936. If You Negotiate With Yourself, You're Dead 😵

In this episode, I'm not talking about sales tactics—I'm talking about the hardest sale you’ll ever make: to sell you on you. 

You’ll learn why the internal “yeah but” conversations are killing your momentum, how emotions—not facts—actually drive your decisions, and why acting before you negotiate is the key to breaking through.

This episode will show you:

• Why curiosity is the doorway to change—and why you keep slamming it shut
• The three ways you act when faced with change: sabotage, stagnation, or transformation
• How to make belief by stacking small wins and earning new facts about yourself
• What it really means to stop negotiating with your future and start building it

If you’ve been stuck, doubting yourself, or waiting to feel ready, this one’s your wake-up call.

Listen now—and start selling yourself a better story.

Thank you to Bryan Eisenberg's book, "I Think I Swallowed An Elephant," for the inspiration for this episode. 

Transcript

0:00

All right. 3, 2, 1. Let's get it. This morning I opened up Brian Eisenberg's book, amazing book. I think I swallowed an elephant, and I landed on chapter 24. Facts Tell, but stories sell, and that's a phrase that we've all heard in sales training, but it goes way beyond selling a product. It's about selling yourself a new possibility. A new identity, a new life, and it starts with understanding One simple truth. Facts may tell, but stories are the things that sell. See, you can memorize every detail. You can know the features, you can understand the tech behind the features, but none of that, none of that sells the car, the house, the gym membership, or even the idea. What sells is the emotion. What sells is the story. Brian writes, action happens because of the emotion behind the facts that hit me. See, you can pile up all the logic and still go nowhere because logic doesn't move people. Emotion does, and every emotion you have to understand has an arc. It's got a rhythm, it's got a swing. I mean, think about it one minute. You believe in yourself, you're riding high, you're telling yourself you can do this, and then life creeps in and suddenly you're spiraling. You're telling yourself, I'm gonna fail. I'm not enough. I'm falling behind. And that's the emotional arc that Brian is talking about. And unless you understand. That, that swing, that arc is normal unless you even expect it. You gotta expect it. Then you're gonna start making long-term decisions in short-term states, and you're gonna end up sabotaging everything good in your life because you think the low is permanent. Brian says that change starts with curiosity. I say it's gotta stay with curiosity. You gotta stay in a state of wonder. Can I do this? Is this for me? What if it works? But you gotta understand, man, curiosity has a short fuse because right behind that curiosity comes negotiation. This is when your mind starts to talk you out of it. You start negotiating with yourself. What if I fail? What if I lose? What if I'm not enough? And once you start negotiating with yourself, bro, you're dead in the water. That's when the Yeah. Buts show up. We all know the Yeah. Buts. Yeah. But I've got kids. Yeah. But I've got all these obstacles. Yeah. But I don't have the money. Yeah. But I don't have the time. Yeah. But I don't have the followers or support. Let me be clear. The, yeah. Buts are the bricks that build your limitations. And if you don't act before they show up, those yeah. Buts, they're gonna talk you out of your goals every single time. So here's the play. You gotta act before the negotiation begins. You gotta move while you're still curious. And this is where Brian really brings it all together. See, there's an order of change. Facts sell the emotion. Emotion sells the action. Even if the facts aren't really true, it's true to you. And if that's enough to drive a feeling, that feeling drives the decision. But not all action is growth. Let me be clear about that. There are three kinds of action. You sabotage yourself. You stay the same, which really isn't staying the same because nothing stays the same or you change. That's it. You're either wrecking it, drifting in place, or doing the hard work of evolving. Brian says the turning point comes when the story you hear aligns with the emotion in that moment. Let that sit in the story you hear, meaning the story that you're telling yourself has to match the emotion of the moment. Think about that. So if you're angry, the story has to be about resolve. If you're heartbroken, the story has to be about rebuilding. If you're hopeful, the story has to be about possibility. That's when belief replaces doubt. This is when action becomes not just possible, but inevitable. This is what I mean when I say you gotta make belief. And when I say make belief, I'm not talking about Pixar, I'm not talking about Disney. If it's possible for them, it's possible for you. This is what I call earned belief, the kind that comes from showing up every single day, doing what you said you do day in, day out. You make the belief by laying the brick, take the steps, do 'em. What's hard, showing up when no one else is watching. And when you do that long enough, the story begins to shift. The facts begin to change. So let me land this straight in between your eyes. The greatest sale that you're ever gonna make. It's to sell you on you. You gotta sell yourself that you're worthy. That until is my timeframe. And that you're not going to negotiate with your future anymore. And the only way that you're gonna sell yourself on that is you gotta take action. You gotta earn new facts. Facts that say, I can do this. I am worthy, I will succeed. And once you earn those facts, and I say earn, once you earn those facts, the belief. It gets easier to sell. You stop selling from fear, and you start selling from a position of strength. So today and every day for the rest of your life, stay curious. Take action before you get into negotiations with yourself and earn your belief. Sell yourself a better story because when you do that. The facts will always follow. Let's get outta here. Keep it simple. Keep it moving. Never settle. Stay tough. Peace.