Repisode 951. Happiness Takes Discipline.

Everyone says they just want to be happy—but that mindset might be the biggest head fake of them all.

In this episode, I unpack the hard truth: being happy is fleeting, but choosing happiness is forever.

Happiness isn’t a mood. It’s a direction. And the path to it? That takes discipline—a personal code of behavior that keeps you moving, especially when your emotions don’t.

We’ll explore:

• Why chasing happiness keeps you stuck
• How to define happiness using the Five F’s
• The difference between emotional highs and directional fulfillment
• Why discipline isn’t about punishment—it’s about alignment
• How to stay the course when life throws adversity, uncertainty, and complacency your way

If you’re tired of relying on motivation and ready to build a life that actually means something—this one’s for you.

🧭 Read the full companion post: marshbuice.substack.com

🎧 Subscribe to the show + catch all episodes: marshbuice.com

Get your FREE worksheet for this episode 👉 (or https://docs.google.com/document/d/19Shx3SFdNz5miihytpX4Pf5nTCCVd0is/edit?usp=sharing&ouid=114215176850004969751&rtpof=true&sd=true)

Transcript

0:00

All right. 3, 2, 1. Let's get it. You know, everyone says that they just wanna be happy. Like being happy is some final destination that you're gonna reach. Once the stars line up, the bills are paid, the stress is gone, and the mood is right. But bro, that's the biggest head fake of 'em all. Being happy is an emotion, and because it's an emotion, like all emotions, it comes and goes. One moment you feel great, and two minutes later, dude, you feel completely empty. That's how emotions work. They're fleeting. They're unreliable, they're reactionary, but happiness. That's different because happiness isn't a feeling, it's a direction, and that direction takes discipline. This morning I was reading Stickability, the Power of Perseverance by Greg Reed, and this is published through the Napoleon Hill Foundation, and he dropped a line. I'd read this book years ago, and when you go back and you listen to stuff again or read stuff again, you're in a different season. And I know I'd heard this before, but it just didn't resonate with me. And today I read this, happiness Takes direction and bro, that stopped me. I never put those two words together. Happiness and discipline. But when I did. And really thought about this and started wrestling with that passage right there. Everything changed. See, we've been sold this lie that if we just work hard enough, we rest long enough, we hustle smarter, we meditate more, we journal better, then we're gonna feel happy. But it just doesn't work that way because again, happy is an emotion. It's based on external conditions and when life takes a shift on you, and those conditions shift, and they always will. So too does your emotional state. So if your happiness is only based on how you feel. Then it's forever gonna be fragile. It's circumstantial, and because it's circumstantial, it's gonna be inconsistent. But when happiness is a direction, everything's gonna change for you. Discipline is how you stay aligned with that direction, especially when your emotions try to pull you off track. Discipline. It is not a punishment. There are consequences to getting outside of discipline, but discipline is nothing more than a code of behavior. It's how you carry yourself when things are going your way and when they're not going your way. See, you don't get head faked on the emotion of it going your way, , and you don't get in the gutter when it's not going your way. It's a code of behavior. So when things are going well for you. You're still trying to ex extract opportunities when it's going poorly for you. You're still trying to extract lessons and opportunities because I don't know what it is about us that we say, oh, I just wanna be happy and we choose to get our lives right. And we're under this illusion that things are just supposed to be peachy cream. It's not. Things are not gonna go your way a lot of the time. Let me ask you this. What does happiness look like for you? Just pause right there. And I'm not saying happiness in some vague feel-good kind of way, but happiness as in directional terms. So what does happiness look like for you in your faith, in your family, which is also relationships and your fitness. And your finances and your fulfillment, both professionally and creatively. These are the five Fs that I use every single day to check my alignment. Because if I'm not paying attention and being intentional in those areas, I'm just gonna drift off. Bro, is it just me? Or have you ever felt like that you're just drifting through life? Not really miserable, but not really joyful either? Kind of like empty inside. That's usually a sign that you stop choosing. That is a operative word, choosing the direction of happiness. You're waiting to feel good before you bust a move, but it works the other way around. You gotta move first. You gotta make the first move. Lemme put it, in my world, I don't always feel like writing or reading every day or recording a podcast. But I do it anyway because that's just part of my code. It primes my mind, it aligns my behavior. It reminds me of the direction that I'm headed. I don't always feel like working out, but I'm not showing up for a feeling. I'm showing up for a result for a way of life, for a direction that I've chosen. Because if I don't choose it, life's gonna choose it for me. And I'm not gonna like the scraps that life hands me. I get to choose that. You get to choose that. That's a discipline. That's where happiness lives in the deliberate act of showing up with alignment and purpose. Even when your emotions don't support it. Now, let me tell you this. You're not gonna get it right every single day. You're gonna fall short. You're gonna blow it. You're gonna wanna quit. Some days you're gonna crush it. Other days, bro, it's like you're just dialing it in. I mean, you just have the don't wants. You're just like kicking and screaming and big lip all the way, and some days you're just gonna completely fall apart. That's normal. That's what it's all about. You have to, if you won every single time, you'd be bored. You'd never grow. It's the losses. It's the times you don't feel like doing it, or more important than the days you do feel like doing hell. Everybody can do something when they're happy, but it's when the emotions leave you happy, will leave you. Happiness will never leave you because you choose it every single day. You choose a direction. You choose the course, and you recalibrate. You just analyze, you adjust, and you keep rocking. This is what discipline is. It's a code of behavior. Regardless of what it looks like out there, the code, you gotta determine that. What's a code for me is not a code for you. It's a sequence of events. It's the numbers on the dial, but you have to put in the reps. You have to come back at it at time and time again when you feel like it, when you don't feel like it. But I do it because I'm choosing the direction of happiness. And when you build a life on those things, you don't have to feel happy to be happy.. So just stop chasing the temporary emotional high of being happy. Stop saying, I just want to be happy. Instead say, I choose happiness every day. As a direction, and I'm willing to develop the discipline, the code of behavior that it takes to keep walking this path, because that's how you build a life that actually matters. That's how you live a life of purpose, of intention. No matter what the day throws at you, it's going to, it's not if things go wrong, it's when things go wrong. It's part of it, man. That's how you succeed. It's the mixture of the wins and the losses, but anything worth doing is going to be hard. It's gonna be some challenges, it's gonna be some adversity, it's gonna be some uncertainty. There's always gonna be complacency. It is all of those things. So in what ways will you choose happiness today? Not as a feeling, but as a direction. and how will your discipline, which is nothing more than a code of behavior, your code, the things that work for you, a behavior, the way that you conduct yourself at all times. What ways will keep you on the path, will keep you aligned with happiness. Do not. Get head faked on the fleeting bullshit. Emotions of being happy. Choose happiness. And choose the direction. It's your choice. Alright, let's get outta here. If you enjoyed today's episode, please subscribe to come back to it. Also I did start a substack. Which is another version of what I share with you just in the written word. Sometimes you need that primer for that. It's my name, marshbuice.substack.com. Be sure and subscribe to that over there. And with that, remember, keep it simple, keep it moving. Never settle. Stay tough. Peace.