Peptalk: Discover Your Best Self and Achieve Your Goals in the New Year.

As we approach 2024, embracing a resilient spirit and having a clear vision for personal growth is essential. In this episode, we'll explore setting intentions that align with our deepest aspirations. We'll talk about seizing professional opportunities, the power of a nurturing community, and the wisdom we can gain from influential people who inspire us. We'll also discuss how jealousy can be reframed and transformed, why it's necessary to set tangible goals, and the excitement of embarking on new experiences that help us evolve. Finally, we'll affirm the importance of self-love as a vital practice, not a selfish indulgence, and we'll make a New Year's resolution to prioritize our well-being as the foundation of empowerment and love. Join me in this heartfelt exploration of what it means to boldly step into a year of manifesting our deepest desires.

Resources for the Standard:

• Download the Asset Foundation Manual (Free): https://www.emmerance.com/free-manuel/
• The Asset Newsletter: Get notified of new logic and standards. https://www.emmerance.com/self-first-letter/

About Emmerance: Emmerance Victoria is a Professional Coach and the founder of Emmerance Coaching Inc. She specializes in the Self-First Standard, a framework for vetting character, bridging identity gaps, and establishing personal authority.

Through her podcast and coaching, she provides the strategic logic for those ready to stop reacting to the material world and start leading from the Source.

Connect with the Source:

• Website: Emmerance.com 
• All socials: @TheEmmerance
• Contact: Victoria@Emmerance.com

Self-First isn't selfish. It's a standard.

Transcript

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Choosing Yourself and Making a Change

Emmerance 0:00

It all starts somewhere . It all starts with you , and it all starts with you deciding that enough is enough , like , how low do you want to go or how low would you like life to drag you down , until you realize that you need to make a change . This is the Emirates podcast , where we empower you to choose yourself , because there's no other human being that's more important in this world than you . This might sound selfish , but it's not . If you believe that choosing yourself is selfish , then I want you to know that self first isn't selfish , and I will tell you why . Hi guys , welcome back to another episode of the Emirates podcast . I'm your host , emirates , victoria O'Tien Dalla , and , as always , I'm so happy and blessed to be back here recording a new podcast episode for you guys . This podcast episode is basically one of the things that I've never thought that I would do , and now here I am and I'm planning big things for 2024 . By the time you're hearing this , I'm posting this on the 1st of January , the New Year's , 2024 . I hope you guys had a wonderful holiday , wonderful time with your family , friends , loved ones , or you just you just rested and you took this time to kind of take care of yourself . I know that the holidays is not equal for everyone . I am 100 percent in that spectrum where I did not have the holiday spirits . But I took the time to really just meditate about life because many things happened and unexpected things happened and it was just like a weird season for me . We're not going to get into details to that , because I'm not here to talk about myself . I'm here to help you . So basically , in this podcast episode , we're going to lift up your spirit a little bit . I am turning 28 this year and I'm just looking back and I'm like , wow , you know I there's things that happen in this world and you just don't know why . I'm going to be forever grateful for my parents . I'm an immigrant and I live in Canada and I'm just so grateful for my parents because if they did not make that decision to move out here , I don't know where I would be or what would be of me . So I'm pretty sure things are just meant to be like , seriously , even with my boyfriend , like we are together . It's been more than a year like a year and five months or six , I think and it feels like we've been each other's childhood friends , like it's crazy . I mean , we're not perfect , but I just feel like the experience that I had when it comes to dating brought me here , and I'll always be grateful for that . So , yeah , it's the new years and I'm here being grateful . What about you ? Are you grateful ?

Emmerance 3:08

I would like to give you a homework for this podcast episode . I'm going to say a lot of things . I'm going to talk my heart out , just how I talk . Most of the time , a divine download . There's just one thing after another when I feel like I need to say something .

Emmerance 3:24

For this particular episode or this particular time of the year , I feel like I just have this intuition to tell you something , and this is probably going to touch someone's heart maybe one person , maybe two , but as long as you listen and you take into consideration what I'm saying , because there's a lot of things that I share . But it's not where you're at in your journey , and that's OK . But in this podcast episode , I wanted to really be real with you and I feel like there's a lot of things that this world brought up . I feel like in this , into this world and in the future , we are going to be more and more softer and I feel like , if you are constantly being soft . There's not really any rewards to that Like you really need to go on , go out there and live a life that you really want . It's not about because someone did something to you that you're going to stop . It's not because of your childhood traumas that you're going to let your future affect you like that .

Emmerance 4:28

I've read so many self-help books about you , know a lot of many public figures , and I think the key to success is really realizing that you deserve more , realizing that your past is just a past , is there for your life lessons , for you to get better in the future , for you to be like . You know I've survived this , so I can survive this . You know new incident that's happening in my life and that's how I really go about my days . When I'm feeling depressed or I'm feeling a certain way or I have all these emotions and all of that and I always think to myself like I'm better , like I've done this . I was younger and I survived a lot of things and it's not because I'm turning 28 that I'm going to be soft . You know , if I have to do those pushups or those burpees or whatever workout that I'm doing is making me do , then I'm going to do it . You know , because I am capable , your body is capable of doing a lot of things , and that's another thing that I have with birthdays .

Emmerance 5:32

It's like I just feel like birthdays are there to remind you that you're getting old , but it's fun . It's fun to celebrate , of course , but at the same time , don't let that dictate what your life is going to be . It's not because statistics are saying that by this age you should be doing this , that , that , that you have to go with it . It's not because someone already predetermined because of the mass , is going through that that you're also going through that . So one thing that I want you to remember going into 2024 is that you shouldn't be putting yourself in a circle where you know that it's not healthy , like you shouldn't profess or you shouldn't speak into existing stuff . That doesn't apply to you . Like I understand , there's people that have disabilities , there's people that have horrible things going on in their lives , but I want you to know that that shouldn't be the cause to stop you being great .

Emmerance 6:33

I don't have a background where my family is well off and things like that , but what I know is that that does not determine my future . That does not determine the fact that I'm unable to have financial freedom , I'm unable to create that wealth that I need generational wealth . It all starts somewhere . It all starts with you and it all starts with you deciding that enough is enough , like , how low do you want to go ? Or how low would you like life to drag you down until you realize that you need to make a change .

Emmerance 7:07

And , unfortunately , whenever I give advice to people and they don't listen , like they will start listening or they will start not really saying oh , it's because Victoria told me to do it . But I've told many people many things and they don't listen . And it's only when they get to that bottom of the bottom or that disappointment not necessarily like when I say bottom of the bottom you guys think that something bad happened . Of course it's going to hurt . Okay , the bottom of the bottom is really that place where you were like I shouldn't have done that . You're regretting your choices . So what I'm trying to say is how disappointing do you want to be of yourself in order for you to make changes ?

Emmerance 7:49

I don't know each and every one of you who's listening to this , but I know that we all have challenges . I know that life can slap us in the face on expecting things can happen , but are you going to let that guide you or are you going to take control of the things that you can take control of your reactions , of your habits , your goals , of the things that work and don't work , of the change , of that change that you have to make in order for you to get on the right track ? And , to be honest , let me be real with you when you progress somewhere , you're still going to get a new challenge . Okay , there's still going to be a new challenge . I experienced new challenge every day , either at work , in person , just by chilling with myself , my mind just goes into places and I start thinking and anxiety kicks in . It's a lot and I understand I'm pretty much not the only one dealing with that . But you can control the way , those thoughts , those events , the things that , the challenges that's happening in your world . You are in control of how you're going to react and how you're going to deal with it . You can take a break , but you cannot quit .

Emmerance 9:06

One thing that I love when I look at , let's say , the social media influencer and I see how they started and where they got now and I enjoy seeing the fact that it didn't take them a year to get there . I enjoy seeing some people where they started on YouTube and they see that it didn't work on YouTube , so they go to Instagram and Instagram is working for them . And then they go to TikTok and TikTok is not working for them , but they still go for it . They're still pushing through , they're still not giving up , because the thing is , there's a lot of reward when it comes to achieving something long term than short term . It's like a lot of people and I'm also for , you know getting something right away , like if I win the lottery today , I'll be super happy , but there's a bigger reward when you know that you got a certain amount of money every year because of your hard work , because of the decisions that you've made .

Emmerance 10:08

I've met many women this year who are really great . Vancouver really opened doors for me , not in a way that I was expecting , but in its own way . You know , god works on its own . You know different ways and for me , it's really about the lessons that I learned when I meet certain people . I can meet you and you're , like you know , a fantastic person , a mom , and just by talking to like mothers this year , I'm like , wow , I'm not a mom yet , but I feel like they do a lot Sacrifices , working , taking care of the kids , making sure they're well fed and all that . Like kudos to you guys .

Emmerance 10:50

If you're a mom and listening to this , let me know , like let me know your challenges . Let me know what you would like me to talk about too . I feel like when you're a mom , you no longer live for yourself , and I do challenge moms to do live for themselves , because the way you help your kids is by giving them examples . Kids learn by watching and they don't really listen . You know you can tell a kid to do this and that , that , but if you are not doing that , how are they going to follow you ? If you want your kids to eat more veggies , to eat more fruits , to eat all of these nutritious foods and healthy stuff , you need to guide by examples . That's how your child is going to learn . That's how they're going to actually grow and be a better human being like you want them to be .

Setting Goals and Embracing Change

Emmerance 11:41

Understanding that enough is enough is really one thing that I would like to talk about today . Like that is the topic that drove me to talk about it today , on the 1st of January 2024 . Like time is passing , we're getting older . When I'm at work and I see that there's new hires , their birthdays on , like in 2004 , and things like that , and I'm like what you know I get , like life is literally letting me know that I'm getting older . But if I were 17 or 15 and I'm unable to work , now that I'm able to work , I need to do something Right Now that I'm able to be on a payroll and make money and not have my parents over like telling me what to do now .

Emmerance 12:32

You need to just spread your wings and go out there . You know , even though there was not a lot of people around you that supported that , there's not a lot of people that took the risk to do whatever they wanted in life . I think you can find that circle . You can find those people that went out there and lived the life . And one thing I think I already spoke about it in previous podcast episodes like , read people's books , like other people's books , the people that you would like to become them or have their life . You need to read their story . Like , read what they did .

Emmerance 13:11

Everyone has challenges and it's not like from the next day they became like that big , that public figure . No , everyone started somewhere . Everyone has haters . I'm pretty sure you have haters too . You don't want to go out there and say that you have haters , but I'm pretty sure you do , and I do too . I don't know who they are , but I still love everyone . You do have haters and people are going to be getting in your way , and sometimes it really has nothing to do with you . It's just it has something to do with their own self-esteem , like some people just don't like what you have because they don't have it . And that's how jealousy works . Again , we all experience jealousy and for me , it's the way you respond to that jealousy .

Emmerance 13:54

I use jealousy , my jealousies towards other people , to see what I'm missing , like you know why is it that I feel a certain way like that ? Why you always have to ask yourself like be intentional with yourself , be focused on what you really need in this world . It's really important In 2024, . I want you to speak things into existence and be intentional about things . Like I have another episode about manifestation that's going to come up and I really want you to listen to that and be like how can I use this to manifest things that I want ? Stop living life as a zombie . Stop always . Like .

Emmerance 14:34

I understand we have to pay bills , things are hard , finding money is hard and stuff but get on with it . Like , write down your goals , write down what you need and I understand not everyone likes to work , but you have to do what you have to do . Like , to be honest , you just have to find something that you love and something that's easy for you to do . Like me , it's easy for me to start talking deep , like I am not someone that just has small talks . I can't have small talks all the time . It's really boring for me and I know that and you should know this for yourself too . Maybe I should talk about how to get to know yourself better , and I'm going to do that . Maybe I'm going to write this down and have in podcast episode in 2024 .

Emmerance 15:18

I think it's really really important for you to have clear boundaries with yourself when you're setting goals . You have to really be strict . Like I said , it's no more the softness , like we are soft because our childhood traumas have been hard and we're just trying to do what we didn't do , have that love , what we didn't have when we were children . So we're trying to be less strict . But I understand , and that's a good thing , but also there's times that you need to be strict and be like you know what . This is a goal , like I need to go and I need to get on with it , and you have to just push through those thoughts that really makes you feel small or makes you feel like you're less than you have to understand that the way you're acting today it's not because of your own reasons , it's not because you decided to do that . It's basically all the things that you've experienced In the past and that's why the past is there for you to meditate on , for you to learn from , not for you to just mourn over it and linger and think , oh , I should have done this , so I'm regretting this , like this is the time . It's 2024 . It's the time for you to actually wake up and do things that you want to do . Set up a goal , do one thing new at least . Do one new thing that you have never done before but you've been interested in doing . I do that at least every year . I do one big thing that's really going to shock me , like , oh my gosh , I did this . And then there's one small things that I do each month . That's new . You know like it can be anything . You know what you need . You know what you want .

Emmerance 17:04

Before I end this podcast , I wanted to talk about how spiritual health is also very important . When I talk about the side health , spiritual health is one thing that I think people even me like . Sometimes I just neglect my spiritual health , but don't neglect it . We are living in a world where there's a lot of things happening without you knowing . Like I talked about haters , there's people that don't want you to go far and if you listen to other people's story that you know . When it comes to witchcraft or whatever it exists , and if you don't know about it , that's great . You can stay ignorant , but at the same time , you still have to protect yourself .

Emmerance 17:43

So , whatever you call that entity that you think is bigger than you , and that's there for you , because that's what God is for me . God is there for me to help me to go through my life challenges and stuff like that . Always put God first , always be grateful , always . Just by sitting down , you can be like thank God for the things that I went through . I'm so happy that I have this , and it's the same way that you manifest too . God is basically telling you that you can ask me anything and that will help you . Sometimes people want to take the hard way up , but you can also take the hard way up , be independent and stuff . But just have God in your head , god with you , put Him anywhere you would like , have Him included in your projects , in your goals , in your life , in your relationships . He's there to help you go through it . So in 2024 , if you're listening to this and your spiritual health has been whacked , you need to work on that . I have been working on it with my boyfriend . We're working on it and we're doing all of this .

Emmerance 18:59

And have goals . Okay , you have to know where you're going . You have to have a goal , a direction . You don't let people dictate where you have to go . Don't let work say , oh , because I'm giving you these pension and things like that , that you're going to stay for 30 plus years . And if you are , please have a goal . Are you going to be a supervisor in these 30 years or are you just going to stay low level ? Have goals . You don't need to be an entrepreneur , you don't need to be a millionaire , you don't need to be all of that , but you still need to understand that your body needs some love , so you need to take care of your body . Have goals for that . Your pocket money needs some goals , so have goals for that . Anything you do in this world , you need to have a goal where you're going to live . If you're where you want to live , if you're going to stay there for 10 plus years perfect . What are you going to do in those years ? You really need to know like goals that just about self care , like I'm going to take care of my skin more . One thing that I want to do is really take care of my skin in 2024 .

Emmerance 20:10

Guys , I've been dealing with acne pretty much all my life and I'm like so sick and tired of it and it's like I'm at that stage where I can go vegan . Like two years ago I was contemplating it , but this year I'm like okay , maybe I shouldn't just say vegan , but I should really treat this with seriousness and treat my acne from inside out . So the things that I eat are very important . It's going to affect my acne . I hope that I'll be able to make videos without any makeup on and people are just going to see clear skin . That's what I want . I see clear skins all the time , you know , and I envy that and that's the jealousy that I was talking about . But my reaction is not to go out there and say they're ugly or you know , it's not even that deep , it's not even that cute . No , my solution is to take care of that for myself . Anyways , I said a lot of things and I don't want to drag on because I have a lot to say .

Unleashing the Power of Self-Love

Emmerance 21:04

All I wanted to tell you is that you are more powerful than you think . You are love . You're made of love and love is basically there for you to guide you and to be more grateful and to just love . You know you're made of love and you need to love yourself first before you can love someone else . So fill up your cup and let it overflow , and it's the overflow of you know , that love that you give to other people . So take it seriously , take your life seriously . I want you to start listening and start taking into consideration people's advice . And one last thing don't wait until you're disappointed in order for you to make changes . Make the change now , all right . So happy new years and wishing you all the best for 2024 . And remember self first isn't selfish . Bye , bye .