Legacy That Lasts

We talk about the kind of legacy that actually lasts and how everyday life at home shapes what our kids carry into adulthood. We share practical ways to keep Christ at the center through prayer, Scripture, and simple habits that build trust and leave a spiritual inheritance. 
• Why legacy matters at every age and season of life 
• Faith lived at home through visible habits like open Bibles and regular prayer 
• How busy parenting seasons still produce long-term spiritual fruit 
• Reshaping grades and performance into identity and gifting in Christ 
• Winning our kids’ hearts so they will listen to truth 
• Simple legacy practices like blessings, devotions, stories, and traditions 
• Why spiritual inheritance outlasts money, records, and achievements 

We’d love to hear from you. If you want to call or text, you can call 629-888-3056, or you can always email at anchored@harpscrossing.com

Transcript

Jen 0:08

Well, hello, and welcome back to the Anchored Family Ministry Podcast. We are three dedicated staff members, and our goal is to help families navigate what it looks like to build disciples at home. And you're used to hearing Daniel's voice. This is Jennifer. I'm sitting in a different spot today. We missed you, Daniel, but we're excited to be here. I'm here with Paul Allen and Dawson Romans, and we've got a lot to talk about today. But before we jump in, y'all doing all right?

SPEAKER_00 0:38

Doing great.

Jen 0:39

Anything going on? Special going on right now.

Paul 0:43

Dawson looked at me. I thought, I don't know.

Jen 0:45

Uh yeah. Okay. Where are we going as soon as we finish the podcast?

SPEAKER_00 0:49

We have the uh the prayer emphasis right now. Yeah. So we're gonna have the sanctuary open for an hour upstairs. Folks can come in. The emphasis today is on praying for government and those in authority.

Jen 0:59

Yeah, this is your realm. You know all the things. It's very impressive. Your history of government, your local government, you're very involved and well educated in this area.

SPEAKER_00 1:11

That's my sphere for sure.

Jen 1:12

Yeah, for sure. Our church has really started a big emphasis on prayer. And I've been thinking about this. This should be all the time.

Paul 1:20

Yeah.

Jen 1:20

You know? And I love that we are jumping in right now and how this is just going to continue to impact individuals and families and our church as a whole and the whole worldwide body of Christ, you know, just jumping in with this emphasis of prayer. So that's exciting. We've got that going on and starting to feel like spring a little bit outside and lots of things.

Paul 1:40

Yeah, lots of weeds.

Why Legacy Matters At Any Age

Jen 1:42

Yeah, I was gonna say lots of allergies. We sneeze as soon as we open the doors already. And yeah, you know, it's funny. My dad had allergies, I've got allergies. I can tell you which one of my kids is going to be the sneezer in our house. And so it's funny, you know, thinking about these things that we get from our parents. And that kind of leads a little bit as we're talking about these things into what we're gonna talk about today. And that's the legacy that we're leaving for our kids, our families, for the next generation of those that we're discipling. So let's jump in. Paul, why don't you take it away?

Faith Lived At Home

Paul 2:16

Sure. Yeah, I'm sure we've talked about legacy before in different ways, but I don't know that we've had a podcast just on legacy, at least in a while. So, you know, I'm married, been married coming up on you know 28 years, so we could just say 30. My kids are getting grown and getting married. My parents are getting older. I have my both my parents are doing well with their health, uh, but they're aging. We just celebrated my dad's 87th birthday a few days ago. So that's kind of what got me thinking about legacy. Dawson is younger by a bit. Uh he's not married yet, but I'm sure he has hopes in that direction and praying and looking. And so thinking about legacy is a big thing for him. You know, so whether you're 16 listening to this, it's time to start contemplating, praying about, looking at legacy, or whether you're 90 and listening to this, that legacy probably means a whole lot to you at that age. So, yeah, we were talking about prayer, and that did get me thinking, wow, you want to talk about legacy, right? And so my dad, being 87, maybe we'll get into the history a little bit of our families, uh, some, but he's very good professional, great provider, great dad. But it wasn't until later in his life that he began to grow more spiritually. And my mom always was kind of the more church family spiritual stuff, and we would have good conversations, but it was when my dad got older that he really began taking that legacy more serious. And so he's done a lot for us the last decade or two that has made a big impact on our family. So we'll talk more about that. But what about you guys? What comes to mind when you think legacy?

Jen 3:54

It's funny. I was sitting with a friend that I grew up with in the church I grew up with in, and he's still there. He leads music there, and we were talking about the name of the church. And, you know, it's not a first Baptist or anything, it was named after a man. And so we were talking about who this man was. Like, why is the church named this? Like, what was so special? No, he was the first pastor. Uh, the church was birthed from a first Baptist church, it was a mission plant. And so we talked about this man, and he had been one of the founders at Samford. And I know all of these things, and I'm like, huh, that is a legacy right there. And I didn't, I knew his last name was devotee, but I didn't know much about him. And so yeah, it's funny that I just had that conversation this week. But yeah, I definitely think about my parents, my dad, and both my parents are still living as well. And I've got three kids at home, but they're all still at home. We're gonna keep them there for a little while longer. And they're a little younger than Paul's, but Tim's parents and my parents, you know, we grew up in church, but it wasn't just a going to church. It was also the life that was lived and the examples given of all of our parents. Tim's parents and my parents, like Bibles were constantly open. Still, you know, when we go to family, the Lord is part of the conversation at some point in every holiday. It's not just a getting together. I mean, there's purpose behind it. And I can remember going down at all ages from when I was little to when I was in high school. And then even when I moved back home for a little while before we got married, my dad always had his Bible out. It was on the dining room table. And it didn't matter what time of day I got there, if that light was on in the dining room, we didn't need it at the dining room. You know, we ate at the kitchen table. But the dining room, if that light was on, I knew exactly what it meant. And still to this day, I can go in the afternoon. And if the dining room light is on, my dad is right there studying his Bible. And like I want my kids to see that. I want them to know that church isn't, yes, church is vital, it's important, and we need to be connected to a body of believers, but it's what you're doing at home too, and the legacy that my dad has left. I'm sure that he got that from his parents.

SPEAKER_00 6:03

I'm a big fan of uh genealogy research. I know we've gone back and forth and talked about it before, but there's one thing that I see over and over and over again as I do genealogy research, is that it's just one individual who changes the entire course for their family. And like the way that my family is today is because just this individual did this and this individual did that. And if it wasn't for the fact that they either for good or bad, if it wasn't for the fact that they did that, my family wouldn't be where it is today in the shape it is today. And God's been good and he's used that to bring about to where I have a godly family and I've been raised in a godly family. But it's all just because this individual did this, or this individual was faithful here, or they sacrificed this for their family.

Jen 6:41

And probably things that they didn't even realize they were doing in that moment. Right. You know, this happened and we pushed through it, or we did this because of it, but they may not have known that this was vital to getting you where you are today.

Busy Seasons And Long-Term Fruit

Paul 6:52

Right. That's cool. The stuff we do when the kids are little or your marriage is new, it's exciting. You know, you got a lot going on, and it's easy to lose sight of the legacy. You know, you're just trying to survive from one day to the next, pay bills, navigate life. It feels like it's coming on you so fast. And I think as you get older, things do tend to slow down. You start to consider other things that are bigger. And so I think it's important to talk to people that are right in the middle of that mix and say the things that you're doing, if you're listening to this podcast, good for you, because that's exactly the kind of stuff that you need to keep you focused on the bigger picture and to be reminded that even though it just feels like maybe a big blur in your day, the things you're doing really, for the Lord's glory, really do begin to pay off. And it may not be till your kids are older. I'm surprised now with my kids that they look at me expectantly all the time. Like, Dad, aren't you gonna do this? Dad, aren't we gonna pray? Dad, what do you think about this? And I'm like, where was this when y'all were like in middle school and high school? Well, no, of course not. Occasionally, yeah. We had some cool talks, but as they get older, it's like, okay, you're starting to see the legacy bear fruit.

Jen 8:08

Yeah.

Paul 8:08

And even start to surpass you, which is really cool. And that's what we want, right? Is from generation to generation for that next generation to surpass us and be further ahead than we were, not just obviously financially or with material stuff, but with spiritual. Let's chat about that for a little bit, the difference between some of these I hate to say it, but worldly goals that we all have to deal with that are important. I mean, your your occupation is huge. Your finances are are very important for the work of the kids, obviously, in your community, but how do you keep a balance in all of that and yet still make your relationship with Christ the most important?

Jen 8:50

Well, I think when your kids are little, you can even talk about grades. We had a conversation this morning, you know, even on the way to school, that I got an whatever on a test. And I'm like, okay, what did you understand? What did you learn from this? And so even just those simple things that everybody's getting a grade when they're little, but to see that there is a bigger picture even there. Now that's a tangible thing. They have to take a test, they have to be graded. They're gonna get, you know, an A or B or whatever to get through to the next grade, but also to talk about the giftings.

Paul 9:21

Yeah.

Jen 9:22

You're not gonna be great at everything, and that's okay because God made you that way. He wants to focus you in a certain direction. So that doesn't mean we don't work hard at everything, but we do keep that bigger picture. Yeah. I don't know. That was just a conversation on the way to school this morning. So it kind of goes along. But I think what you were saying in the rush and the busyness, sometimes we don't think about the legacy, yes, but our reactions to what comes along during those busy seasons is setting the groundwork for right.

Grades And Identity In Christ

Paul 9:53

I think an easy way to remind yourself or help yourself is to remember what you remember about your parents growing up.

Jen 10:00

Yeah.

Paul 10:00

Good and bad, right? You remember the times they were irritated, anxious, frustrated with you some. Hopefully, though, you also remember the good, the grace they gave, the time they sat and taught you, the little things they did that made you feel special, right? That should encourage us to remember that when we do those things, when we pray with our kids before they jump out of the car and run into the class, it may just seem like, man, I've done this a thousand times and they don't even care. That's probably the stuff they're gonna remember when they're older and say, Man, my mom and or dad, you know, prayed with me every time I went to school. And that's gonna be what stands out more than you were a little stressed that morning or hey, you got angry or whatever, you know?

Jen 10:44

Yeah, and like you have two girls taking them on dates and making them a priority.

Paul 10:50

Opening their door.

Jen 10:51

Yes. Those kind of things like makes the a big impact.

Paul 10:55

Love covers a multitude, right, of sins. And so, yeah, as parents, when we are walking in the word and walking in the spirit and growing, it's going to help us to have those conversations about grades that take it from performance to who you are in Christ, right? And it just happens naturally. I love what Jennifer was saying earlier, like how no matter what they did, it seems like the conversation came back to Christ and in our homes. So that's what we want. Sometimes with movies, books, shows, whatever we're watching that are just like, hey, this is like right on the edge of me saying no, we shouldn't watch this. This is a little too much for your age or whatever, but to use that for the Lord and say that some of the words they use, we don't use those, right? Why don't we use those words and talk about it with the kids? Always having a teaching moment.

Winning Kids’ Hearts For Truth

Jen 11:45

Yeah. My daughter is at an age where I feel like every conversation is important because she's a preteen. I've got her a little bit longer where she doesn't mind to hang out with me and go do stuff with me. And hopefully she won't ever want to not be with me. But like she's still listening to me. She's still asking me questions. And so I do like right now, while she's a little bit younger, want to turn every conversation into those teachable moments. Like it's not just uh, hey, let's go run to Starbucks, because that's a huge thing, right? For a 12-year-old, that's a really big deal to get to go to Starbucks. But what are we gonna talk about in the car as we go? What music are we gonna listen to? And to see her make choices. She has an artist that she really likes, and she said, I added three and add the other two. And so we were able to talk about why she didn't, and she had made the choice. They say words we don't say. That's amazing to see those little things that they've been listening to here and there.

SPEAKER_00 12:42

I think uh a huge point in that uh that both of you touched on is the fact that part of that is you have to actually have the hearts of your kids because if they just don't care about you or care what you say, you're not gonna accomplish anything. And you see that like in Second Kings, when the people are turning away from David, it's because Absalom stole away their hearts. And so their hearts were stolen away by Absalom, so they were willing to turn away to a usurper, somebody who was taking the rightful place of the king because the king had lost their heart. They did not have any affection towards him anymore. So you have to have in everything, whether teaching, in families, pastoring, anything, you have to have the hearts of your people so that they'll listen to you in the first place. They have to know that you care so much for them, that you love them so much, you seek their good so much that they're willing to listen to you, and that they seek your good and they care for you in return.

Practical Legacy Ideas From Families

Paul 13:31

I think that a big part of that, and I appreciate you bringing that up, Dawson, is holding to the truth as the leader, you know, in the home, mom and dad, grandparents, the older in the family, uh, to hold to truth at all cost. But you can do it in a way that shows people that you love them, right? And that you want what's best for them. There's been a little bit of a you know, like a social media thing about this family where the granddad recorded the entire Bible for his grandkids. I don't know if you've seen that.

Jen 14:03

No.

Paul 14:04

Yeah, and it's really neat because, you know, he's got these grandkids, obviously that range and all sorts of ages, but a lot of them are teenagers, and they, you know, just at first, I think when that video came out, showed them at Christmas, they each unwrapped a little uh, you know, I think it might have been a jump drive or something that had him reading the whole Bible to them, uh recorded it in a different color for each one, and they're kind of like, oh, well, thanks, granddad, you know, that's cool. But then it's gotten popular because so many people saw that and liked it, and so you know, it caught on, and now they're like super proud. This is my granddad. We're the family that granddad read the whole Bible or recorded the whole Bible. But man, what a legacy to pass down in a loving way the truth. And so one thing my dad started doing about I don't know how many years ago, maybe five, six years ago. He started doing devotions that he would uh text out to each family, each of his kids' families and grandkids. He does probably about two or three a week. I think there's usually three a week. He's an electrical engineer, so he does a hundred words exactly. I don't know how he does it, but it's gonna be fun. I think we'll probably be able to publish these and hundred-word devotions. But they're about him, you know, he walks on the beach every morning. He's retired, of course, and walks on the beach. He still does some work, and so he talks about he and mom and what they see, and just how he sees God working in nature sometimes and other things. But it's really cool because the grandkids love it. I mean, the grandkids feel so special to get these and like them. And he stands for some pretty bold truths, but it's in a very loving, unconfrontational way, where if there's some of his family that doesn't love that right now, they still appreciate getting that.

Jen 15:47

Yeah, my dad did the story worth.

Paul 15:49

Yeah.

Jen 15:50

We gave him that for Christmas. He didn't stop with one year, he went to, so we have two very thick books on our shelf, but it's fun to look at them. Like we'll be talking, and he'll say, Well, I wrote about it in your book. And I'm like, Oh, probably haven't got to that chapter yet. There are a lot of chapters, y'all. A lot. He looked up pictures to go with each of them, but it's fun to look at some of the questions and how he does turn them into pointing to the Lord, whatever it is, if it's a a story about a cousin or or whatever that, you know, on Sundays though, we knew, you know, whatever it is, that he turns it back to the Lord. So yeah, I love that. One thing I was thinking about from what Dawson said about each kid, this made me laugh. I'll share this real quick. And then I've got another thing. Each of my kids this morning in the car was talking about how the other ones were our favorite. I'm like, well, yeah, that means you're all our favorite. And they're like, no, you do this for them and you do this for them. But knowing them each, they wouldn't feel like that one was our favorite or that one was our favorite because it would be obvious, you know. Anyway, it just made me think of that. It was funny. But talk a little bit about the importance of the relationship with mom and dad, the legacy that you're leaving for your kids watching um, your kids watching you. Like the relationship between you and Mandy.

Marriage And What Truly Lasts

Paul 17:04

Oh, yeah. That's been amazing to watch. And I will say too that I would think of Mandy's mom who passed about a year ago, went through a difficult divorce, but she served the Lord, was faithful in her church, was a prayer warrior, loved the grandkids, was hanging out with us all the time. So I, you know, I hate to say it, but it's just so obvious that when you love the Lord, it's gonna impact big time the next generation. Now, if you're married, you know, grandma and grandpa, and we get to watch them as a married couple, that's really sweet too, in that they love the Lord. And so with me and Mandy, I know that's the only real valuable thing we're passing on to our kids is our love of the Lord. And hopefully a decent marriage. Well, yeah, and hopefully some land and hopefully some money and all that. That's what we were talking about earlier. It's like, man, you could pass down pass down incredible scientific discoveries, you could pass down tons of money, and it is all forgotten in a generation or less, or squandered, maybe even. Who knows? Not that those things aren't good, but it's only the things done for the Lord that seem to last for generations and impact things where we look back in our our heritage and like, oh, there was a preacher back, you know, six centuries ago, but look, now we're following the Lord again, you know?

Jen 18:30

Yeah, we were watching the Olympics and it was every race had a new record. Well, yeah. Okay, you were the record for what, a minute and a half until the next guy on the next round did something quicker. And so, yeah, that legacy that you're leaving, these are things that aren't gonna go away that somebody can't outlive because it's not about us. Yeah, it's about him.

Paul 18:54

As much as I enjoy holidays, you know, it's like I remember some of that when I was little, but no. I mean, what I really remember is my parents' love of the Lord.

Jen 19:05

We always made a birthday cake for Jesus.

Paul 19:07

Yeah.

Jen 19:07

I remember other things about Christmas. I mean, I'm sure we did other things. We had a Christmas Eve service at church. We made a birthday cake for Jesus. Those are the big things I remember. Like I know we went to our extended family for some I I know that those things happened, but those were the two meaningful moments of what we did at home.

Paul 19:24

Two things that my mom and dad have done that have meant the world to me. My dad, especially, often he stops me or saying bye, or sometimes just out of blue, he'll say, you know, I just want you to know I'm very proud of you. You know, when you hear that from your dad, it's huge. And so I try to remember that with my kids to take time to say, Hey, I am so proud of you. Keep up the good work. The other thing, too, is the times he has prayed God's blessings over me. And that happens pretty regularly, but then there's been times where it's just been unusual. Made me think of it when you're talking about the birthday party for Jesus and that cake. But like at a birthday party, why not do that for your kids and say, We're gonna do all the fun stuff, we're gonna celebrate, have the you know, parties and food and cake, but we are gonna stop and pray God's blessings over you and lay hands on you or something. Just make it where your kids are like, wow.

Everyday Habits God Remembers

Jen 20:14

Yeah, we do that at family birthdays or family dinners for a birthday. My dad, we call him Chief. And everybody knows if it's your birthday, Chief's praying for you. And he's like, Don't you want, you know, don't you want Tim to pray for you? Nope. I would like for you to pray for me. This is my birthday. So this is what happens. You know, it's a big thing. But this isn't just our family members. There was a kid at church last night, had a hard time going in. This is so great. And we were able to tell his friend who was in the class after class, thank you. I am so proud of you for welcoming him in. And that makes a big, big impact on kids of all ages, adults of all ages, to hear that you're proud of them and for godly reasons that hopefully they want to have those outstretched arms again, bringing more kids with them next week. Any other thoughts? Like in all of this, none of this is extra special.

Paul 21:06

Yeah.

Jen 21:07

Sometimes we want to do the big things and the grand things, and our kids are so gonna remember this, and this is what we're working on for our grandkids. None of these things have been that that we've talked about today.

Paul 21:18

At the conference we just got back from I remember one of the speakers saying that he reads through the Bible like each year. He's a pastor, and and that's understandable. Some people it might take him two years or or more to read through the Bible, but he does it in one of the Bibles that has room for notes. Yes. And so what he does is with that Bible, he makes notes, his study notes about what he's learning and what God's teaching him and puts us all in the um in the margins, and then gives that to a different kid each year. And so by the time he's done, each kid's gonna have a stack of Bibles that they could pass on to their grandkids or his grandkids. And I think he said he was doing it for his grandkids as well, and so that's why he could just keep on doing that. And I said, Wow. That would be more valuable than any stack of money, believe it or not.

Jen 22:04

Yeah, it really would.

Simple Spiritual Practices And Closing

SPEAKER_00 22:05

So every now and then we get formed by like big events, like big explosive, huge events, and that shapes us and that changes things. But the biggest thing, you're right, that shapes us is like, what do I do when I wake up first thing in the morning? What am I thinking about when I'm sitting there eating lunch? What is my evening routine? Like the day-to-day things. How what's my attitude towards work? How do I feel when I have to show love to my neighbor? And you see, like in Ephesians 2, it says we are his workmanship created in Christ Jesus for good works, which he has prepared beforehand for us. So we're created for those good works, and those good works are created for us. So we're designed to fit together with good works. And if God beforehand has created us for good works and prepared those good works beforehand, then he's not going to forget those good works. Hebrews says that he is not unjust so as to forgive or to forget your service, which you have done for the saints. So God remembers because in eternity past he prepared works for us to do, good works for us to do, small good works for us to do. He's not going to forget them because in eternity past he cared, okay, they're going to encourage this person today. They're going to be faithful today, they're going to help their kids today with this. God doesn't forget our good works. And so the most lasting legacy ultimately, of course, passing on through the generations, but also the fact that the Lord remembers and the Lord is written down and the Lord recalls and is not unjust so as to forget our good works, which we have done in his name.

Paul 23:27

That makes me think that we can get bored, depressed as we get older. Not bored from the standpoint of just sitting around doing nothing. It's like, what's the purpose of life? You know, even Christians get that way sometimes because you go to church, you're busy, you're doing all these things, but are you doing the works God has created for you beforehand? And so when you do, if you're bored or you're looking for how to do legacy with your kids, it's not the hard things. It's the more simple things that we know the Lord would have us invest in praying for our kids, teaching them the word, being an example, having conversations with them. Those things, don't let those be a burden, like another thing. Oh, I gotta do this. Let that be the main work that you're doing. And I think you'll find joy and excitement and let the other things fall as they might, whether you know how many sports you're in, how long you do homework, all this sort of stuff. It's those sort of things. And so, yeah, my dad, again, going back to him, he said, I asked him, What do you do on your walk? How do you pray for specifically? I know he prays a lot. He does like a three-mile walk on the beach every day. And so he says, on one way, I'm memorizing scripture. On the way back, I always pray for family, just pretty much just pray for family for 30 minutes. I'm like, wow, thank you. He shared some of the specifics he prays. I'm thinking, wow. You know, and that your kids may never know what you've prayed for, but if they know you're praying for them, that makes a huge difference. And those are the works I'm sure that we're called to that actually will be way more profitable than we could ever imagine.

Jen 25:06

All right. Well, we hope you have got some new things to think about when it comes to the legacy that you're leaving for those around you, whether it's your kids, grandkids, or a class that you might be teaching, whoever it is that God has them there for a reason and has you there for a reason in their lives. We'd love to hear from you. If you want to call or text, you can call 629-888-3056, or you can always email at anchored at harpscrossing.com. And we are so thankful that you joined in with us today. And until next time, stay anchored.