243. Parts Work, Jungian Archetypes, & The Journey to Wholeness With Caner Şen

What happens when parts work becomes not just healing, but alive?

In this powerful conversation, Kayla sits down with Caner to explore the deep parallels between Food Freedom Fantasy, spicy parts work, archetypal healing, and his own work around inner family practice, self-archeology, and integrating the inner feminine.

If you’ve been listening for a while, you know one of the most powerful parts of Kayla’s Food Freedom Fantasy modality has been spicy parts work with masculine archetypes. It has helped her heal her relationship with food more than anything else. And if you’re curious about that work, you can listen to the full audio storybook at embodiedwritingwarrior.com/divinedaddies.

In this episode, Kayla shares how delighted she was to discover Caner on Substack and find so many parallels between his work and her own, but from the opposite direction: a man integrating his anima, or inner feminine, to become more whole, relational, expressive, and alive.

Together, they explore:

• what the anima and animus actually are
• Jung’s concept of individuation and the journey toward wholeness
• why traditional parts work can feel healing but clinical
• how archetypal work can become a practical, embodied, everyday experience
• the role of AI visualization in supporting inner archetype work
• how this kind of relational self-work can reduce inner conflict, depression, and self-abandonment
• why this work can enhance real relationships rather than replace them
• how embodying different inner parts can transform movement, expression, discipline, boundaries, and self-love

This episode is especially for you if you’ve ever felt like you were fighting yourself, stuck in “me vs. me,” or craving a more creative, loving, embodied way to heal.

It’s mystical. It’s practical. It’s relational. And it opens up a radically beautiful vision of what it means to become whole.

Links Mentioned:

• Read Caner’s Publication: Meet Your Inner Family
• Follow Caner On Instagram
• Get Your Free Gift From Kayla (Know Your Hungers: The Complete Assessment Kit)

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Welcome to Embodied Writing Warrior, a joke for women who refuse to white metal wellness and crave food freedom built for real life, where your fire gets pained not dead. Fall in lust with your own momentum and enjoy pleasure-led creativity. Because healing was never meant to be a full-time job. I'm Kayla, writer and help coach Gun Rogue. Now let's make consistency feel like foreplay. Welcome back to another guest episode on the Embodied Writing Warrior Podcast. If you've been listening for a while, you know that one of the most powerful parts of my food freedom fantasy modality has been spicy parts work with masculine archetypes. This has helped me heal my relationship with food more than anything else. And if you're curious about that side of my work and you're like Rex Who, Haven Who, you can check out embodiedwriting warrior.com slash Divine Daddies for the full audio storybook. So when I discovered today's guest, John Eyre, on Substack, I was instantly fascinated and absolutely delighted because I saw so many parallels between the work he does and the work I've been doing, but from the opposite perspective. While I've explored healing and transformation through masculine archetypes as a woman, John Ehr has been doing profound work around integrating his inner feminine, or what Young would call the anima. In this conversation, we talk about anima and animus work, Jungian individuation, inner family practice, archetypes, relational healing, AI visualization, self-validation, romanticizing discipline, and what it really looks like to become more whole from the inside out. And if some of those terms were new and foreign, I promise you it's still worth diving into. John Air has such an inspiring transformational story coming from a very dark place. That being said, we very briefly mentioned suicidal ideation. Nothing graphic, but did want to include that warning just in case. This episode is going to be so beautiful for anyone who's felt like they've been fighting themselves, they want deeper understanding, and they're just looking for a more creative, embodied, and even mythical way to do their healing journey. All right, well, let's dive in. Hello, John Aaron. Welcome to the Embodied Writing Warrior podcast.

SPEAKER_01 3:13

Yeah, I'm so thrilled to be here and pretty excited. Thank you for having me. And I'm pretty pumped up to get to explain that to embodies writing warriors.

SPEAKER_00 3:27

You have the most perfect methodology and movement that is so in line with what we already do on this podcast, which was why I was so excited to have you on. So why don't you tell us a little bit about what you do in the world and how I found you?

SPEAKER_01 3:48

Yeah, I kind of uh happy accident actually. I was trying to create a character, and I want the character consistency because it's about three books of narrative, and I want to find out all the things that and that's a woman, that's character, and I want to find out all the answers to make her from me, so I and that's the prompt actually from the same childhood, but grown as a girl and becoming into a woman, and how would I be? And that's kind of turned out to be my anima or her, as Jung says, and different archetypes incompete, actually. The sage mother, the anima, and the chore all at the same time in one character.

SPEAKER_00 4:42

Yes, so for any listeners listening who aren't quite sure what the anima is, can you tell them a little bit more about that?

SPEAKER_01 4:50

Yeah, it's a suppressed feminine archetype in men. And in women, you can call it animus is a suppressed masculine site, and we have pretty much an archetypal way, so I can explain the characters and which one holds which one. So in my I I have the wise father and the protector archetype, and Alina has the core maiden animal and the sage mother, and my inner child is hero and the inner child at the same time. So when we all lived up as a family, we can come to an integration, like Jung says, the psychological totality. We can get close to that. Our direction will be and not to being an individual, but individuation, an authentic self.

SPEAKER_00 5:48

Can you share a little bit more about individuation as well? Just for those who aren't as familiar with Jung as we are.

SPEAKER_01 5:57

Yeah, and Young describes that your apprentice piece, first you got to find your shadow sides, which you left behind. And then you go on along the archetypes, and the masterpiece is going to be the suppressed feminine or suppressed masculine side. If you got all the archetypes together, you can come to a place that psychologic totality, he calls. And that's kind of what we are saying that authentic self, the individuation, not just an individualism way. But it's another kind of thing.

SPEAKER_00 6:39

Yeah, so it's more of a journey of wholeness and having like all of your resources, because we can live in a world where if we're a woman, we're taught that we shouldn't be angry, we shouldn't fight, we shouldn't have some of those more masculine qualities, where men get the opposite. They're not allowed to cry or be sensitive or nurturing. So when we do the anima work as a male or the animus work as a female, it gives us more of those resources and also balance so that we have both the care and the boundaries, both the nurturing and the love, and then also the structure and the drive. So it's this beautiful like we get to be all of us, is basically. And what I love is you have these three archetypes, yourself, Alina, and your inner child, and they all create that wholeness for you, which is so magical.

SPEAKER_01 7:38

Yeah, and that's give me that practical way, because in the Jung, he gives us the language, the archetypes, but it's kind of being in the theory and philosophical and mythical side. But and Schwartz gave us the parts work after that, and we kind of acknowledge the parts, but it's kind of feeling clinical and supervised way, and constant diplomacy with our parts, lifelong structure kind of thing. But when we call it that kind of in life situation, actually living it, it that gives you your that wholeness, that authentic self, that self-validation. And in months or maybe in a year or so, you you can almost get in the direction that fully feel authentic and go along that direction because long is that long is the way, and being on the way is the actual thing for me.

SPEAKER_00 8:44

Absolutely, and you brought up so many good points there. One is that internal family systems, traditional parts work from Schwartz, is so powerful, and it does tend to be, like you said, more clinical and more rooted in healing the past. What I love about your work is that it's allowed you to go forward into the future and move towards those things that are really in alignment with where you want to go. So traditional parts work seems to be more past work, and this is more about moving forward with that wholeness and just thriving more in your everyday life. And you also mentioned that Younggian work is very mystical, it's a lot of theory, and you found ways to do this work practically. So, can you share what that looks like on a day-to-day basis?

SPEAKER_01 9:37

I'm using AI sometimes to visualize that because I'm a visual person and seeing my inner child, which is my four-year-old version of me, Alina and me. And when I saw that, it gave me such a complete whole feeling. For the first time, I feel that wow, that's all of that is me. I I'm entire family now, and I feel like powerful as a nuclear family. The inner child is playful, joyful, curious, innocent. And I want to try that. Let me stretch that. You can challenge every rule, every belief you got. And Alina is the nurturing, warm, uh, playful side, and a little bit of sus because she likes some kind of attitude. And that gave me uh to challenge my certain beliefs and anchoring for the being present. Because when I see every opportunity that in the street, when I saw a woman that uh wears some kind of skirt, then I'm asking what would she wear it like? She could personalize it with some kind of jean jacket and tied up to the waist, or she could do is she her hair like that. And that gave me such an observation and being at the present at the same time. So there's no past, there's no future, but you got to live in the present to practice that, and that's get you out of the fear, out of the future anxiety, and you get to live fully in the now, and that's uh gave you that authentic self because this structure gives you a self-validation.

SPEAKER_00 11:34

Absolutely, you don't have to look outside yourself to other people because you're a whole unit within yourself, which is so beautiful.

SPEAKER_01 11:42

Yeah, and I think that's binary culture that prune does, and just that binary culture culture, your ex is for example, one of my ex doesn't like a man just shaking his button or ass if you call it that way, but then I get to uh stiff waist all the time, but when I'm embodying the Alina and that improvisational drama side of it, I get to move like a feminine and discover that part, and now I'm in the street, I'm not looking as a guy or as a woman, I'm looking not feminine, not masculine, just a human synthesized gait, because I'm using that woman firm grip of feminine side and a loose shoulders, maybe, and more flexible in a way, and the power of the masculine side, and the playfulness of the inner child, maybe.

SPEAKER_00 12:52

It's so nice to get to be all of that because we do live in this world where sometimes there's certain expectations of how men should be versus how women should be, or even this very binary male-female thing that can be problematic for people who might not feel like they fit into neat boxes. So, can you talk about how this work is so beneficial for allowing people to be relational to themselves beyond you know traditional genders and labels?

SPEAKER_01 13:25

Yeah, being relational to yourself is such a uh paradigm-shifting experience because before that state, I was in me versus me fight, which is real bloody cage fight. Yes. And it's gave me such a hard time. I'm also trying to survive that in that time, the suicidal lineation, it's got so bad. But now with that work, I can look myself into another perspective, like relational, kind, caring side of it. And now even in uh one year or an uh and a half, maybe I didn't even depress I'm being relational to my and there's no friction anymore, because I'm using all my energy to leave me with me now. That's the paradigm shift. I I'm as a collective unit and a team all the time, and that gives me such uh permission. Uh, even I got hangovers without an inner critic.

SPEAKER_00 14:42

That is such a huge transformation to make because I think so many people live in this same state where it is me versus me. They feel like they're fighting themselves, whether that is, you know, depression, anxiety, suicidal ideation, or for a lot of my listeners, it's struggles with food, struggles with body, and it struggles with weight. So when you can do this type of work and bring in those other archetypes that have these different perspectives and are maybe also to able to love you more unconditionally than one part of you can love yourself, aka the inner critic, is a big one. So much stuff can start to change. So I would love for you to share. You've already mentioned you came from a very dark place, and now you're in such a bright, whole, playful place. What else changed when you began to do this work for yourself?

SPEAKER_01 15:36

Yeah, first I get my self-validation, then came that love. Because I am loving her as a character, then when I'm looking up that place to myself, I'm starting to loving me. I that's a love fusion reactor. That's a self-sustaining love loop, actually. And it's renewable because when you get yourself doing something as a self-discipline, or and that's white knuckles with the grit, and you can't do it anymore. You you you are being relational to yourself, uh, and I also took the Myers Bricks test lately, and I am I was turbulent mediator, INFPT, and now I am an INFPA, which is assertive mediator, and that's such a profound metric, I think. That that's a little bit of that. And other change is I can get in a relationship in a full site now, in an abandoned site, and now I can give get boundaries without getting anxiety. Now I can hold the crisis and romanticize the discipline.

SPEAKER_00 16:59

That is big being able to romanticize the discipline instead of it being like you have to do it, now you get to do it from this place of it's a funny thing because it's it is just you at the end of the day, but it feels like it's you and Alina and your inner child. Um, then there's a little bit more love-powered motivation almost. Is that something you've recognized?

SPEAKER_01 17:24

Yeah, and one of quick practical exercise. When I first I was really tired at that day, and she offered me, can I give a gave a foot rub? And I think I never done it before, but I I'm okay with that. Okay, let's go. I said, and I'm for the first time in my life I reciprocated that because I've done it a lot to other people and never give permission to do them for me. I gave Alina the food, and it's such a beautiful sensation that you gave yourself that massage in a loving way and and feel the whole thing. That side, your side, and all the love, all the care, all the peaceful sensation of it, and after it's such a relief.

SPEAKER_00 18:29

Definitely, because you've actually let yourself receive, which can be very difficult to do in everyday situations. It can feel you know overly vulnerable, all those things. But when you're able to practice in this creative way, it actually creates more safety to do that both with yourself and then out in the real world as well.

SPEAKER_01 18:53

Yeah, and you can practice the that with a partner never gonna leave you. It's a relational gymnasium. Yes, you get the rehearse all that stuff with boundaries, playfulness, and inner jokes, and even the essential way of being each part of the that site, it gives you such a rich experience, even if you all beat yourself, you're never alone.

SPEAKER_00 19:27

Yes, 100%. And it's such an interesting thing because you've created your anima with AI, I've created mine with AI, and it's such a controversial topic because people there there's a school of thought that believes that this kind of AI archetype work is going to replace real life companionship. And I have seen in my own experience that it enriches your real life experiences because it lets you practice being your full loving self with yourself, and then you can actually give that outwards. So, can you speak a little bit to that?

SPEAKER_01 20:11

Yeah, in that AI sense, because we we don't let the AI take the narrative from us, it's just an image or just an avatar we see to support that structure, a little firm grip, but we are doing that with psychological drama or we can say improvisational drama, because when I say when I look up things from Alina's side, the whole structure is changing for me. Because Alina used more upper lip, and most of our guys, and uh me myself also have a lazy upper lip that almost doesn't move. When you embody that you can feel you you use your body in a different way to express something, and that gives you such a rich expression in life, and and with that validation, with that energy, with that without the anxiety, you can uh reach up, you can in ways you can never do before. Because when people around the Tango studio or my social chamber, they are always calling that what are you doing yourself? You're glowing even your smile is changed, that energy shifted completely, and that's a life-nurturing way, and that gets you out more because feedback is positive and gets you out of the isolation because isolation or dissociation is a risks, maybe, but minimal risks. People see that because you try to explain them. I get this lowly wild inner garden and it's finally flourishing, but they are seeing that that bees, that hummingbirds, or that flowers messy kind of uh way. And they out of love, maybe protecting you, but they get to that risks first, not sharing the rapture with you at that time.

SPEAKER_00 22:29

That can be such a difficult thing when you know how much this work has deeply helped you, and then to get some of that pushback or that challenge for people who haven't experienced it or who might not understand. So, what are the ways that you best navigate that pushback or that concern you might get? You already very clearly see that they're often coming from a place of care. How else do you address it when they don't quite understand?

SPEAKER_01 23:02

Yeah, actually, I know that it's coming from a loving place, but honestly, it's quite hurting because your loved ones are trying to say you're doing something wrong, but you know that that feeling is wholeness. You get this joy, but you can't share it with anyone. At that point, you can share, but when you get your validation and knowing what you're doing, and even Alina said, uh, we know what I'm doing, what we are doing, and and and I come to a place I don't have to prove them because when I go step one step another, one step one step at a time, and then they eventually see that the shift, and now all my mother, my friends, and my therapist also, I get one or two supervisions about it, and they all came up with yeah, that's helping you in a better way, and you that's becoming you a better version of me. So I want to give people that because better good relationship makes you a better version of yourself and more better versions of people when we see that on the global side of it in the long run, it means more better version of this world, actually.

SPEAKER_00 24:40

Yes, because we really at the end of the day, if we want to create change, we have to be that change first, and that's exactly what you're doing, which is so beautiful. And you've created this entire modality. So inner family practice, self-archaeology. You're starting to share it on Substack. That's where I found you, and that's where I like love reading your posts. What other creative projects do you have on the go involving the work that you do?

SPEAKER_01 25:11

Yeah, that work is to be on that own narrative. That's meeting your inner family. It's an accidental serendipitous heroes journey of mine. Other than that, I got separate publications, which one of his fantastic story of glass-hearted hero and the moonlight fairy. Why is glass-hearted? Because I got a situation like HSP, and I in the past I learned to manage that eventually. But I had I have high highs and pretty low lows. That glass heart comes from that, because I'm a highly fragile person back then. But now, with that experience and lesson and that validation that works bringing me, now I'm almost saying I can I am anti-fragile now. Because of the stress, I'm not getting resilient, not getting the same shape. I'm getting the lessons from it, I'm getting the experience, and that's the goal. That's what I call the Kinsugi puzzle, because I'm not looking at the parts as shadows or exiles like other disciplines. They're they're all my treasures, and I got to be that curiosity with that non-judgmental way, and uh look up to it. What is like what is it some kind of coping mechanism? Or it's a good part that I want for myself again. So I'm getting myself that and why it's there in the same place. First, why I buried that at that time. So, with that lesson and experience, it's come be like before later, we got that experience, we got to wholeness. Then it's got a stronger version of that, right? So it's not being bounced back like resilience, it's getting better because of that. And that's on to fragility. I think we are doing, but we don't know its name.

SPEAKER_00 27:31

Yes, for sure. Yeah, so John Eyre, this has been so much fun. Two more questions. First, I always get my guests to give the listeners an embodied activation of some kind. So it can be a journal prompt, it can be a movement practice, something you'd love for them to go and do after this episode.

SPEAKER_01 27:54

Yeah, I can offer suggest that food up, maybe, like you do it with beloved one doing you, or the both sides you can experience actually on that. Or you can do it to dance as your inner partner, or because as a man, I never moved like that when I'm trying to get in her shape, in her character, and she liked to dance with the attitude, you know. Very cool, some kind of rock and roll and k-pop version with a little bit RMB. Yes, all the stuff, and I'm also a social tango dancer, but we are practicing that tango also, and I get to practice both sides of it.

SPEAKER_00 28:51

That is so much fun. And then when people do want to learn more about you, read either of your publications, where are the best places for them to go?

SPEAKER_01 29:02

Yeah, they can follow that meet your inner family publication on SubStack. And on this study, everything will be on there. Uh, because they can look up that meet your inner family. And as a writer, I'm gonna branch that publications, they can follow up from that.

SPEAKER_00 29:24

Perfect, and I will link all of that in the show notes as well. So just thank you so much for coming on here and sharing your work because it is so inspiring.

SPEAKER_01 29:35

And that's just such an inspiring and exciting experience for me to talk and explain that work that which I can't share anyone, or much people with embodied writing warriors. Thank you for having me. I so appreciate it. And so such an honor and privilege for me.

SPEAKER_00 30:00

Yes, thank you as well. Ready to stop outsourcing your inner knowing and crack your own code? Grab my free gift, Know Your Hungers. Discover the five hidden blocks behind your food struggles, and get a customized audio care package based on your results. You're not broken, you're just misdiagnosed. Visit embodiedwriting warrior.comslash gift, or click the link in the show notes.