Speaker 1: The year was 1986.
Speaker 1: I was a junior in high school and my family we had the honor, my dad and my grandfather purchased 80 acres of land in northern Michigan way before I was born.
Speaker 1: But we got a chance to go up there and we called it Up North.
Speaker 1: I grew up in Grand Rapids and so it was about an hour and a half or two hours from our house and we would hunt for deer, we would fish, we would drive motorcycles and dirt bikes and all kind of crazy stuff.
Speaker 1: And on this one occasion in 1986, my family it was just my mom and my dad and me and then one of the other, my cousins, their family was up there and it was my dad.
Speaker 1: Had, counting my dad, there were 10 siblings, and so everybody got a parcel of land as a part of the legacy and heritage of my grandfather passing, and so we were up there together, the two families and the cousins and I were having so much fun.
Speaker 1: I mean, listen, I'm sorry, chicago, we were out shooting guns and we were out, you know, taking down chipmunks and squirrels, and I'm sorry, I just got to be honest, like it's what you do when you're out in the woods, you know it's like there's only a few things you can do, and that was one of them, and we rode our dirt bikes and started fires in the woods and then put them out.
Speaker 1: Of course we put them out and so.
Speaker 1: But we had so much fun and we were eating dinner, just my family, and they were in their cabin.
Speaker 1: But we were in our little cabin eating dinner and then I was finished before my parents were done and I was like I'm just going to go check and see.
Speaker 1: And so I was running towards their side of the property and I noticed their truck was leaving.
Speaker 1: They were on their way out, loaded up and had a lot of wood to burn back at the house, and so they were truck full of stuff.
Speaker 1: They were leaving and I turned around and ran back to my cabin and walked in there and they were like what's up?
Speaker 1: I was like, well, they just left there.
Speaker 1: And they were like what's up?
Speaker 1: I was like, well, they just left and I have a declaration, I'm ready to leave now.
Speaker 1: And so they were like okay.
Speaker 1: So it took them about 30 minutes to clean everything up and get ready and they're like let's go.
Speaker 1: And so we got in the car and started driving south towards Grand Rapids and it's just a two lane highway, nothing fancy, all through the little towns of Northern Michigan.
Speaker 1: And as we were driving we came up over a hill and the highway was just illuminated by all kind of emergency vehicles and ambulance and police officers and it was just lit.
Speaker 1: It lit up the sky.
Speaker 1: And as we pulled through the accident scene I'll never forget it is as clear as today, as could be.
Speaker 1: And I remember looking to my right out of our window of our vehicle and my uncle's truck was upside down, the cab of the truck completely flat, there was debris everywhere and I just remember a panic and fear and my dad said I'm going to.
Speaker 1: He pulled over to the side road.
Speaker 1: He said let me go check.
Speaker 1: And not before my mom realized I was opening the door and following after my dad and To God be the glory they were, they were not injured severely, there was no.
Speaker 1: It could have been so much worse.
Speaker 1: But the fallout of that was the next few weeks.
Speaker 1: I had such weird emotions and I struggled for the next weeks into a couple of months of just severe anxiety and fear and when I would close my eyes at night I would see the image of that vehicle turned upside down and even though I knew they were okay, there was just.
Speaker 1: It was like there was a gripping fear, that of what could have been, and I can't explain it.
Speaker 1: I couldn't get around it.
Speaker 1: I didn't want to sleep at night.
Speaker 1: I didn't try out for basketball that season, I just had.
Speaker 1: I could not get my brain to focus.
Speaker 1: It was just this weight on me and I'll never forget.
Speaker 1: One afternoon I was just kind of complaining to my mom about it and she said you know what, maybe just forgive the driver of that vehicle that hit your uncle and aunt and your cousins, and just forgive them and just see what happens.
Speaker 1: And so I'll never forget.
Speaker 1: I sat down and I prayed a prayer and I just released that situation.
Speaker 1: I released that guy and his responsibility.
Speaker 1: I just was like God, I just forgive that person.
Speaker 1: I don't think he really meant to do it, but it was.
Speaker 1: I forgive him and whatever it was.
Speaker 1: But I'll never forget that night I slept all the way through and the next day I felt so much better and day after day it was just like I completely bounced back from that just terrible anxiety and I never have dealt with that anxiety again in my life, and it's the year that I learned that a spirit of forgiveness will remove the weight of bitterness and offense in your life so you can move forward.
Speaker 1: So why don't you just turn to your neighbor and just say, hey, I'm ready, and tell the other one you've been ignoring all service.
Speaker 1: Just bump them and say I have a declaration.
Speaker 1: We're in week three of our series, I Declare.
Speaker 1: It is a powerful series of moving us from want and wish, and even hope, into action.
Speaker 1: And hey, I've got good news for you you are on your third Sunday of the best year of your life.
Speaker 1: Come on, it's your third Sunday, third Sunday of the best year of your life.
Speaker 1: So far, we've had these declarations this year.
Speaker 1: With God's help and the power of the Holy Spirit, I declare I will be a person of consistency.
Speaker 1: And then last week week we made a declaration that I will be.
Speaker 1: I will take responsibility for my life and no longer will I blame others.
Speaker 1: I won't play the blame game, but I will release that.
Speaker 1: I will take responsibility for where I am at life, because the buck stops with me.
Speaker 1: And, man, I just got to give a shout out to those of you.
Speaker 1: It was a powerful Sunday.
Speaker 1: If you missed it, I would go back and listen or watch it on YouTube or Facebook or the podcast.
Speaker 1: Anywhere you can find a podcast, you can say hey, alexa, play Free Church Oak Park podcast and it will come right up and I would encourage you to listen to that.
Speaker 1: There were so many people responding by email, taking next steps of responsibility and seeking help to move forward.
Speaker 1: And if you haven't done that yet, it's not over.
Speaker 1: There's still time for you to keep taking responsibility for where you are at in life.
Speaker 1: Not that there was no other people involved in it, but you take your responsibility and move forward.
Speaker 1: And today is kind of an add-on to that and this is the declaration.
Speaker 1: I'll give it to you and then at the end we'll share it.
Speaker 1: We'll all declare it together.
Speaker 1: Are you ready?
Speaker 1: So here we go this year, with God's help and the power of the Holy Spirit, I declare I will greet each day with the spirit of forgiveness.
Speaker 1: Should be up on the screen there.
Speaker 1: There we go.
Speaker 1: I will greet each day with a forgiving spirit, recognizing the poison caused by bitterness.
Speaker 1: I will choose to move forward, move toward forgiving others the way Jesus has forgiven me.
Speaker 1: Forgiveness.
Speaker 1: Everybody say forgiveness, forgiveness.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna give you three truths about a spirit of forgiveness and as we move forward, I think this is gonna help you tremendously.
Speaker 1: And when you talk about having the best year of your life, there are things you need to change in your life and mainly, you need to let go of what's behind you so you can push forward into what God has for you.
Speaker 1: Paul said this forgetting what's behind me, I press on towards the mark of the prize of the high calling of Jesus Christ, and that mark and that prize is your best year yet.
Speaker 1: So let's go, you ready.
Speaker 1: Three truths of how to grow a forgiving spirit.
Speaker 1: Number one a forgiving spirit is commanded in God's word.
Speaker 1: It's not a okay, if you want to.
Speaker 1: It's not a when it's easy, it's not, uh, only on friday or only on sunday morning.
Speaker 1: It is an everyday commandment that we should walk with a forgiving spirit.
Speaker 1: It's commanded in god's word and i'll'll give you scripture for this.
Speaker 1: This is Colossians 3 and 13.
Speaker 1: Bear with one another and if anyone has a complaint against one another because Paul knew we would have complaints Smack your gum too loud.
Speaker 1: I'm not picking anybody out here.
Speaker 1: I'm just saying there are some things I have complaints about others about, but listen if anyone has a complaint, that didn't go over well.
Speaker 1: So if anyone has a complaint against another, forgive each other.
Speaker 1: Just as the Lord has forgiven you, you also must forgive Ephesians 4.12 says this and be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ has forgiven.
Speaker 1: You See those commands in there.
Speaker 1: Those are commands, that's God's word, commanding us to have a forgiving spirit.
Speaker 1: This is what Jesus said in Matthew 4.
Speaker 1: It says if you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive you, but if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive you.
Speaker 1: There's no conditions to this verse.
Speaker 1: There's no disclaimer or asterisk on this verse.
Speaker 1: It is a command that when we forgive, our Father forgives us.
Speaker 1: And really, if you want to be forgiven, you have to learn how to forgive.
Speaker 1: It's not like we can say this is what the scripture doesn't say.
Speaker 1: The scripture doesn't say forgive unless it's been more than 10 years, or forgive unless they never asked for forgiveness, or forgive unless it's adultery or abuse.
Speaker 1: No, the scripture says we're to forgive and then we'll be forgiven.
Speaker 1: So that is the first way to grow a forgiving spirit is to understand that.
Speaker 1: It's commanded in Scripture for us.
Speaker 1: The second part is this A forgiving spirit is a strong witness to an unbelieving world.
Speaker 1: It goes against culture.
Speaker 1: 1 John 1.9 says if we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us of our sins.
Speaker 1: We have in First John 2.2,.
Speaker 1: He is the atoning sacrifice for our sins, and not only ours but also the sins of the world.
Speaker 1: So Jesus has forgiven us and when we forgive, it helps us to be more like Jesus.
Speaker 1: It helps us to be more like Jesus.
Speaker 1: You see, forgiveness is a callback to the cross.
Speaker 1: Remember as Jesus is hanging on the cross.
Speaker 1: He looks to his right, to his left, he looks in front of all the people there and he says Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.
Speaker 1: It means we even need to forgive when it's unintentionally harming us, when others are unintentionally causing harm in our lives.
Speaker 1: We learn how to forgive.
Speaker 1: When you forgive, you're releasing the right to revenge or retaliation, and that's what makes you most like Jesus, and I read this the other day Forgiveness is a funny thing.
Speaker 1: It warms the heart and it cools the sting, and I think that's so true.
Speaker 1: Forgiveness also has physical and mental effects on our life.
Speaker 1: When we forgive and we don't carry that weight of bitterness and offense, we actually we live a healthier life.
Speaker 1: We can trace sickness to stress and sickness to bitterness, and so when you forgive, you actually live a healthier lifestyle.
Speaker 1: Holding on to bitterness is a trap that actually can destroy you.
Speaker 1: Look at Hebrews 12 and 15.
Speaker 1: It says look after each other so that none of you fails to receive the grace of God.
Speaker 1: Watch out that no poisonous root of bitterness grows up to trouble you, corrupting many.
Speaker 1: And I was thinking about this that remember in school when in school, your teacher had to bring a milk carton and I know that you usually used a smaller one, but I used bigger ones so we could see it better.
Speaker 1: But they would have you bring a milk carton and then you would put the, the soil in and you would put a seed or two.
Speaker 1: Or, if you were like me, I put as many as I could in there because I wanted the plant to be as big as possible, and and then the teacher would say okay, there's a few things that you have to do if you want this to.
Speaker 1: I put as many as I could in there because I wanted the plant to be as big as possible.
Speaker 1: And then the teacher would say, okay, there's a few things that you have to do.
Speaker 1: If you want this to grow, you have to water it.
Speaker 1: And so you would water that.
Speaker 1: And then you know, you would prep it all week long and then Friday most of us were so excited to get out of the room we wouldn't water it and we'd run out.
Speaker 1: But you know, the A students not me, the C students we were out on the, we were already out on Friday, it's like the weekend.
Speaker 1: But the A students, they would prep and water and then you come back and then the plant would be like this because they watered it and then they would continue to water it.
Speaker 1: What I hated most about this project was mine mostly resembled this.
Speaker 1: Rarely ever resembled this.
Speaker 1: And then the teacher's pet would walk in and it would resemble that.
Speaker 1: I forgive you, susie, in third grade for being a teacher's pet, but our teacher would say something when we were leaving.
Speaker 1: She would actually say this If you don't water it, it won't grow.
Speaker 1: And that's the same with bitterness If you don't water that, it's gonna grow if you continue to water it.
Speaker 1: And look at this.
Speaker 1: I thought this was pretty powerful.
Speaker 1: That where am I out of my nose here?
Speaker 1: Because it's powerful.
Speaker 1: The root of bitterness grows when it is watered by the moisture of our memory and fertilized by the failure to forgive.
Speaker 1: So if you, if you don't want bitterness to grow in you, don't water it.
Speaker 1: I read this today, like don't let today's pain rob you of tomorrow's hope.
Speaker 1: So I read this evil for evil is man's way.
Speaker 1: Evil for good is the devil's way.
Speaker 1: Good for evil is God's way and God's way should be our way.
Speaker 1: Like even though we I mean everybody would justify if somebody does wrong, it's justifiable, go ahead and take them out.
Speaker 1: But that's what the devil wants to do.
Speaker 1: The devil wants to tempt you to live in this lifestyle of just wait.
Speaker 1: Or here comes my revenge, here comes my moment for payback.
Speaker 1: And I'm just telling you.
Speaker 1: The word of God tells us don't water that bitterness, don't water that bitterness, don't water that bitterness.
Speaker 1: I love this quote by Lee Strobel.
Speaker 1: He says those who move toward bitterness rather than forgiveness can become a hostage to their own hatred.
Speaker 1: So my question is do you have the grudge or does the grudge have you?
Speaker 1: We need to learn how to forgive and people handle bitterness in different ways.
Speaker 1: I read this about this older lady, single lady, senior lady, who was pre-planning her funeral and she went to the funeral home and bought the lot and was talking to the funeral director and he was going through the order of the service with her and then he said okay, well, you need pallbearers, that's the people that carry the casket to and from the hearse.
Speaker 1: And he said so, who would you like that to be?
Speaker 1: And she named six of her female friends and the funeral director sat back and he thought for a minute and he said now I just wanna make sure you don't want any men to help carry the casket.
Speaker 1: It's gonna be pretty heavy.
Speaker 1: And she says no way, those guys wouldn't take me out when I'm alive and they're certainly not gonna take me out when I'm dead.
Speaker 1: You're gonna carry that bitterness all the way to the grave.
Speaker 1: You know, if you don't, if you don't feed it and if you don't water it, the bitterness will not grow in your life.
Speaker 1: A snake slithered into a barn and slithered over a saw and as it went over the saw, the teeth of the saw cut the snake and shocked it and then, just in its own natural instinct.
Speaker 1: It turned around and coiled around.
Speaker 1: That saw in anger and then it hurt more and so it coiled even stronger, even tighter, and then it hurt more and it coiled even tighter until finally the snake bled out, not realizing the snake could have saved his life had he let go of the initial pain.
Speaker 1: And that, friends, is how many of us live.
Speaker 1: It's not the last pain that takes us out.
Speaker 1: It's the first smaller pain and we keep coiling and attacking and feeding and watering it.
Speaker 1: And I'm telling you we have to stop watering it.
Speaker 1: And last one, as I close, number three, number three is this A forgiving spirit grows from experiencing it firsthand.
Speaker 1: Scripture says Matthew 18 and 21,.
Speaker 1: Then Peter came to him.
Speaker 1: This is Jesus.
Speaker 1: He came to Jesus and asked Lord, how often should we forgive someone who sins?
Speaker 1: How often should I forgive someone who sins against me?
Speaker 1: Seven times, boy Peter, you are.
Speaker 1: Let's give it up for Peter.
Speaker 1: He is so seven times, let's go.
Speaker 1: Everybody is like, oh, seven.
Speaker 1: I know those guys around him are like teacher's pet, like God.
Speaker 1: No, peter does it again.
Speaker 1: But Jesus says no, not seven times, but 70 times seven.
Speaker 1: And the reality of that was Peter.
Speaker 1: If you're counting, it's not working.
Speaker 1: If you're counting, your heart's not in it.
Speaker 1: If you're counting, you're just going through the motion to get it over with.
Speaker 1: And Jesus continues, and he tells this story in verse 23.
Speaker 1: He says therefore, the kingdom of heaven can be compared as a king who decides to bring his accounts up to date with the servants who had borrowed money from him.
Speaker 1: And let me just give you a little trick If you're in the Bible app right now following along in notes, if you just click that reference, it'll ask you if you wanna launch the whole scripture and then you can read the whole story.
Speaker 1: Don't do it now, but you can do that later.
Speaker 1: But let me just paraphrase the story.
Speaker 1: There was a man we'll call him man A and man Number One, we'll call him man Number One.
Speaker 1: Man Number One owed a year's worth of salary to the master.
Speaker 1: And as the master was settling accounts which, by the way, the word reconcile means to bring back to zero so he was reconciling accounts, which meant he saw that this man owed him so much money.
Speaker 1: But he reconciled that account, he brought it back to zero and he forgave that man of that year's worth of salary.
Speaker 1: And so man number one walks out the door and runs into man number two which, by the way, man number two owed man number one just a day's salary and he says hey, I just remember you owe me that.
Speaker 1: And he's like oh listen, I can't pay you today.
Speaker 1: Give me a few days and I'll be able to pay it.
Speaker 1: And man number one says no, that's not an option.
Speaker 1: And even though he had just been forgiven of so much, he looks at man number two and says nope, you're gonna have to go to jail for this because you're not paying me.
Speaker 1: Then the master hears about man's number one actions and he goes back and he finds him and he says you know what?
Speaker 1: I was gonna relieve you of that debt, but I've changed my mind.
Speaker 1: Since you won't forgive, I'm not forgiving you.
Speaker 1: In fact, I'm gonna throw you in prison.
Speaker 1: And he said well, in prison, I'll never be able to earn the money to pay you.
Speaker 1: And he said well, you're gonna be in prison.
Speaker 1: And oh, by the way, you will suffer much harm in prison.
Speaker 1: He actually said you'll be beaten and you will be taken out in prison because you refused to obey.
Speaker 1: And that is such a picture when I read that story.
Speaker 1: This is what I see.
Speaker 1: This is what I see when I read that story.
Speaker 1: The master is God.
Speaker 1: Man number two is the person that has done something against me, has a debt towards me, and I'm man number one and God has forgiven me of so much in my life.
Speaker 1: And I'm looking at this person who's done very little in the scope of things, and I'm not forgiving him.
Speaker 1: Then how can I be forgiven of so much?
Speaker 1: It's almost this is the way that I frame this.
Speaker 1: The greatest debt ever against us is our sin.
Speaker 1: The greatest debt ever against us is our sin and the greatest price ever paid for us was his life.
Speaker 1: And because of that, because God forgave me of so much, I need to learn how to forgive those.
Speaker 1: Even if it's little, bitterness pulls a filter over your eyes so that every relationship you have is filtered through that betrayal.
Speaker 1: That's why it's critical for us to learn how to forgive, and I know, in a meeting like this, in a moment like this, that this kind of word is a stretch for us, because it actually goes against how we've responded to most situations in our life.
Speaker 1: And when we carry bitterness and when we carry offense in our life, it seems like we're constantly coming up against something that hinders us from moving beyond it.
Speaker 1: And the reality is, what we're coming against is the very thing that we're carrying in our heart.
Speaker 1: Recently, a few years ago, I used this as an illustration and I looked all over for it in this building.
Speaker 1: I'm sure it was still here, but I carried a fence around as I preached a message and it was just a section of fence.
Speaker 1: And it's what we do when we carry bitterness and offense in our life.
Speaker 1: And what's incredible to me is, when we carry that fence with us, it's almost like we'll set that fence in position so that nobody can get to us, because the hurt of one and the mistrust of one becomes the mistrust of all.
Speaker 1: And so, instead of using that like we think, we're using that offense and that pain to protect us from it ever happening again.
Speaker 1: But what happens is it not only keeps other people out, but it keeps us locked in, and we'll never get beyond that until we learn to let it go.
Speaker 1: And I just want to just challenge you today.
Speaker 1: Like man, the Holy Spirit moved in a powerful way in worship and did far exceeding and abundantly more than we could ask for or imagine.
Speaker 1: But in this moment, we have something that we have to do.
Speaker 1: And I just wonder who is it that you need to forgive?
Speaker 1: It might have been something small, it could have been a story or a joke at your expense, and it could have been something significant, like a wrong touch, or it could be something that just, man, it seemed so unfair at the time.
Speaker 1: Was it painful?
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Was it awful?
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 1: But it's only going to keep growing until you deal with it and release it.
Speaker 1: And the only way you release it is you do just as your heavenly father has done for you you learn how to forgive.
Speaker 1: So some of you have some homework today, this week, some of you have to step back and say, like, who is this person that I need to forgive?
Speaker 1: And you need to write them a letter, pick up the phone, call them, reach out to them.
Speaker 1: But I promise you this is a critical step to your best year yet.
Speaker 1: Because what if we get on the other side of that offense?
Speaker 1: What if we get on the other side of that bitterness been growing in our heart?
Speaker 1: Man, there's to be so much freedom.
Speaker 1: There's going to be so much opportunity.
Speaker 1: There's going to be so much room in your heart to be filled up with all the things God's doing, all the things God's saying, all the way he's working in you.
Speaker 1: And this is just the, maybe the last little piece.
Speaker 1: And I'm just standing here saying can you make this declaration with me, can you take this step with me?
Speaker 1: Because if you can forgive, you can be free.
Speaker 1: If you can forgive, you can be free.
Speaker 1: Are you ready?
Speaker 1: Let's put it up on the screen, let's all say it together.
Speaker 1: Man, this is gonna be such a freeing moment.
Speaker 1: I just get a glimpse of, I get a glimpse of just the, the excitement of us living on the other side of the fence.
Speaker 1: Are you ready?
Speaker 1: Here we go ready.
Speaker 1: Here we go this year, with God's help and the power of the Holy Spirit, I declare I will greet each day with a spirit of forgiveness.
Speaker 1: I will greet each day with a spirit, a forgiving spirit.
Speaker 1: Recognizing the poison caused by bitterness, I will choose to move forward, forgiving others the way Jesus has forgiven me.
Speaker 1: Come on, do you mean it?
Speaker 1: Can you receive that word today?