#106 After the Breakup...with Paul Bauer

Breakups can turn smart people into amateur time travelers—looping through the past, bargaining with memories, and mistaking longing for a plan. We sit down with author and podcaster Paul Bauer to unpack that spiral and chart a way out. Paul shares how a rough divorce and a second hard breakup pushed him to confront the real constant—himself—and why inner game, not tricks, determines whether attraction lasts.

We dig into the difference between being a good man and a “nice guy,” exploring covert contracts, boundary setting, and why approval-seeking reads as instability. Paul breaks down the painful math of chasing an ex: fixed narratives, harder tests, and the near-inevitability of relapse into old patterns. Instead of looping back, he lays out a clean framework for moving forward—no-contact done right, grief without bargaining, rebuilding routines that restore purpose, and practicing selection with intent. The goal isn’t to win her back; it’s to get yourself back so you can date from strength.

From there, we shift into practical tools for attraction and long-term desire. Paul explains how leadership, playful tension, and everyday physicality revive intimacy—especially in “dead bedroom” dynamics—and why waiting until bedtime to ask for connection sets everyone up to fail. We talk about the captain–first officer model, how to lead without steamrolling, and how to keep relationships fun without slipping into complacency. Whether you’re wrestling with one-itis, navigating divorce, or trying to bring spark back to a long-term bond, you’ll leave with clear steps and a steadier frame.

If this conversation helped you, subscribe, share it with a friend who needs it, and leave a quick review. Your support helps more people find the show and start moving forward with confidence.

Chapters

• 0:00 Opening & Guest Introduction
• 0:08 Attraction, “Nice Guys,” and Boundaries
• 3:29 Paul’s Backstory: Marriage to Divorce
• 8:19 The Second Relationship & Wake-Up Call
• 12:22 Deep Dive into Dating Psychology
• 16:28 Why Chasing Exes Fails
• 19:38 Healing First, Then Dating Strategy
• 22:47 The Series: Fix, Forget, and Keep
• 26:44 Relationship Leadership & Long-Term Desire
• 29:32 Initiation, Desire, and Everyday Seduction

Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:00

Welcome to the Straight From the Source's Mouth Podcast. Frank talk about sex and dating. Hello, Tamara here. Welcome to the show. Today's guest is author and podcaster Paul Bauer, and we'll be talking about the struggles men face after a breakup or divorce, especially when it comes to attraction, emotional obsession, and rebuilding your dating lives. Thanks for joining me, Paul. Tamara, thank you so much for having me on. I really appreciate it. Yes, thank you very much for being on. Great information from what I read about your what you're going to talk about. So excited to have the information for my listeners.

SPEAKER_01: 0:34

So I'm happy to share this stuff. And uh just to preface what we're about to talk about, I my my book that I have out is very controversial. Well, at least the title is. The title's controversial, but the inside's pretty it's uh it's it's it's a little bit softer and easier to swallow. Uh, but uh you know, you gotta you gotta get an attention-grabbing title these days, otherwise people aren't gonna buy your book. Yeah, for sure.

SPEAKER_00: 1:00

Yeah, and and I mean I've had several episodes about like the differences between men and women and how we talk differently and the attraction that women have. Like a lot of people think I read years ago about you know, women men thought women liked assholes, but really we want a challenge, but we want a positive challenge. But if we can't have a positive challenge, we'll settle for a negative challenge versus a no challenge. So I don't know if you agree with that, but it's it was like askmen.com years ago, and it's always resonated with me. But I think that's kind of the stuff you talk about, or at least how to keep the attraction for a man. And then feel free to start where you want to start.

SPEAKER_01: 1:37

Yeah, no, I actually um a lot of guys think that, right? They think that I can either I can either be a good guy or I have to be an asshole, and that's not necessarily true. You don't have to be, you can be a good man, you just can't be a nice guy, and there's a there's a big difference there that a lot of people don't understand. Like nice guys, self-proclaimed nice guys, and the guys that we're talking about in the men's space is uh guys with classic nice guy syndrome. And there's a guy named Dr. Robert Glover, he wrote a phenomenal book years ago called No More Mr. Nice Guy, and he really is the the expert that shin the light on this phenomenon that has been happening since World War II, where men have been raised to be people pleasers and and we let her we we let people walk all over us. We don't know how to set boundaries right, we don't know how to have standards for ourselves and focus on our purpose and and all this kind of stuff. And so what these guys end up doing is they're nice in order to get something back, and we call that a covert contract. So they're in reality, they're anything but nice, and the moment that they don't get back what they believe that they're owed for doing this nice behavior, now all of a sudden they're not so nice anymore and they're passive aggressive and all this kind of stuff. And and so a lot of self-proclaimed nice guys that complain about the jerks out there, that's how they're acting, and then they're wondering why women don't really like them that much, is because women aren't stupid, women can actually sniff this out. It's like women can smell this like sharks smell blood, you know. So so women if that's their option, they're gonna go with the the jerk most of the time because the jerk actually knows how to set boundaries. He might not do it in the best possible way, but he at least knows how to do this sort of thing, and so yeah, no, it makes perfect sense to me. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00: 3:29

And do you want to talk about your book first or talk about how you got into knowing all this information, like kind of your background or yeah, let's get into my my background a little bit.

SPEAKER_01: 3:37

I'll give people my my Batman origin story. So uh yeah, I wasn't always in this space, and I used to think that I knew everything I needed to know about women. I was actually always pretty good with women, I used to think anyway. Uh, you know, in high school, I always had girlfriends, uh, but I was always that guy that was running for the white picket fence. I was looking for uh a wife someday, and and I would just sniper date any girl that was remotely nice to me. I would go all in on her, and this is this is it, she's the one, you know. And so that carried uh after high school into the the Navy, and two years into the Navy, I met my now ex-wife, and she and I we eloped when I was 19. Um, and so I wasn't even old enough to drink alcohol yet. But but uh we in and when we did that, we hadn't even really known each other that long. I met her when I went home on leave one time uh through some mutual acquaintances, and we had this long distance relationship for about a year before I convinced her to move out to San Diego where I was stationed. And then three months after that, we got we eloped because I was getting ready to go on deployment and I wanted to make sure she was taken care of, and that's that was my job as a man to be a provider and all this kind of stuff. So so I did that. I married her, um, completely didn't have time to really get to know her that well, uh, really understand her red flags and all this kind of stuff. And um, what ended up happening was uh the I would say the first half of the marriage was pretty good. We were married for 14 years. The first half was pretty good. We ended up having two really wonderful kids uh as a part of that relationship, but the last half was just absolutely miserable. Um, I just I didn't like being around her, I didn't think she didn't like me that much. Uh there was times where I'd I'd just be so frustrated with her that I would I would go in the garage and grab a cot and go sleep in my office because I didn't want to sleep in the same room as her. There was days where I'd work like 18-hour days just to avoid going home. And then I knew when I got home that I was gonna get an earful, you know, so I would just sit in my car and just, you know, take some deep breaths, waiting for this, this uh bombardment of nagging or whatever. And so I was just miserable. But at that time, I I was also the guy that never would have quit because I, you know, my parents are always uh stayed together, my grandparents, both sets of grandparents, stayed together, but they're always miserable. The men in the relationships were miserable, but that's just how life was. And so I was like, oh, this is it. You get married, uh, it's pretty good at first, you have some kids, and then all goes downhill, and you're basically Al Bundy. That's just how life is supposed to be. Well, God bless her. She finally had enough of it in um in 2014, the very beginning of 2014, she filed for divorce, and so I ended up back on the dating circuit for the first time in 15 years, and I hadn't practiced in forever. It was a whole new world. New date, dating apps and everything didn't exist when I met her. And so I just floundered. I floundered around for about 11 months. Um, and I was 50 pounds overweight and stuff too. And so I just floundered for 11 months until I met this other gal um who I refer to on my podcast as Red Pill Chick. I always like to keep people anonymous, you know. And so I met Red Pill Chick, and she was a little bit of a chubby chaser. She liked, you know, thicker guys, and so that she took pity on me, and I just went back to my old patterns, went all in on the first girls nice to me. And we were in a relationship for four and a half years, and uh I immediately went back into what I call husband mode, where I just was like, oh, I don't have to try anymore. I already got her. And I was just really looking for that routine, you know, that routine that I had been accustomed to for the last 15 years. So I just immediately went on that. She she checked out, she checked out about two years into that relationship, and she started lining up male orbiters that she had, you know, around. And next thing I know, uh at the four and a half year mark, she's just pushing me away so much and sort of acting so bad that I finally was like, okay, uh this isn't working for me. We got to break up. And then I found out in hindsight that she was actually cheating on me at the end, you know? And so that that was in uh 2019, and I found myself back on the dating circuit again. This time I was able to get dates really easy because I had lost all the weight during that relationship, but I couldn't keep women around more than two or three dates. And I was like, what am I doing wrong here? You know, I had this epiphany moment where I realized I was the common denominator. Like the both the biggest relationships of my adult life failed. Uh, now I'm back on the dating circuit again for the second time in my adult life, and I don't know what I'm doing. Like, I I'm clearly doing something wrong. And so um, one of the blessings of being the real in the relationship with Red Pill Chick was she was really big into audiobooks. And so I was like, Well, I bet you there's some some books out here that I can read or listen to that'll help me figure out what I'm doing wrong. And so I just did an absolute deep dive in intersexual dynamics and psychology. I read some of these books 25 times, just on repeat, trying to understand what I was doing wrong. And uh, and then I was taking that information and applying it on the in the dating circuit, and I was having lots of success with it. And I that brought me into a men's group uh that's no longer there on Facebook, but this in this men's community, we were all studying a book called How to Be a Three Percent Man by Corey Wayne, and so what we were all doing in that group was we were all going out and dating and then coming back and sharing our stories of what worked and what didn't, sort of swapping notes and guys saying, Oh, well, try this next time or read this book. This book has better, uh, a better understanding of this particular scenario kind of thing. And so through that experience, I sort of developed my own style. And then uh I started interviewing guys on that uh from that group. And that's where my podcast started. And then I started meeting uh authors and and and coaches and and other guys, bigger names in the space, and eventually got invited on a panel show on Saturdays with a lot of prominent people. Uh, it was called Rule Zero. And from there I started writing books and coaching guys, and it just sort of blew up from there. I sort of turned my pain into my passion, and and here we are today, and now I have four books.

SPEAKER_00: 10:21

So yeah. I mean, yeah, it's good that a lot not a not a lot of people want to take the time to learn about themselves and figure what's go figure out what's not working.

SPEAKER_01: 10:31

So yeah, well, I mean, I I was I was that guy, and and a lot of guys uh when they go through a breakup or divorce, they're thinking, um, well, there are a couple of different scenarios, right? Like if they absolutely hated their wife or their ex-girlfriend for whatever reason, they're like, oh, well, she was clearly the problem. All I need is another person, and you know, everything is gonna be hunky dory, but they don't realize that they're taking their same bad relationship habits into the next relationship, and they end up dating the same person with a different face, you know, and this the same thing ends up happening and until you start working on yourself. That's the only way you're gonna change these things, but everyone wants to point the finger at everyone else.

SPEAKER_00: 11:14

Yeah, definitely. So, what was your well, since we're talking about your latest book, start there, and then maybe if you want to talk about the other ones too. But what did you what are guys suffering from when they first break up?

SPEAKER_01: 11:27

Yeah, so uh so my latest book, it came out in June. It's it's called Forget That Bitch, A Red Pill Guide to Breakups. And what what really inspired me to write this book was I actually had a couple of uh uh what I call 3% brothers um from that men's group because we were all studying how to be a 3% man. So we're all 3% brothers in that group. And of a good majority of those guys found their way into the space and into that group because they were trying to reattract an ex. And they were all, you know, they realized that they messed something up in their relationship and they were trying to fix it and they were trying to get her back. And there was a couple of guys, two specific guys, that I just remember they wasted years, wasted years just pining over an ex. And they would go out dating and they would have relatively good success, but they could never um, they were always comparing these new women to their exes. They're never good enough, they're not as good as my ex. And these guys were just stuck for years at a time, and it was heartbreaking to watch, uh, absolutely heartbreaking to watch. And in the the red pill community, which is sort of where um where I come out of uh getting back together with an ex is is the worst idea possible because usually your ex has some kind of preconceived notion about you, it doesn't matter how much you're you've changed, they always have this idea of who you really are at heart, and they don't believe the surface level changes. And honestly, most guys are only doing these changes just to get her back, and then they just go back to their their old programming. So they're not even really doing it to fix themselves and change themselves, they're just doing it as a means to an end. And women aren't stupid, like I said before, women can sniff this out, so it almost always ends the same. She'll she'll test you harder, she's going to just to see if this new version of you is real or not. And so it becomes this nightmare and it causes a bunch of fights, and you end up broken up again. And so I just I just don't want to see more guys go through this. So when I wrote this book, the way I wrote it was with those kinds of guys in mind. Uh, guys that are obsessing over their ex, they know they need to move on, but they're they can't stop thinking about the ex. And so the way my book goes, the flow of it is I talk about why after a breakup, getting back together with an ex is a bad idea. But you're not gonna listen to me. You're gonna want to do what the heart wants, right? So the second chapter is this is how you get them back. This is there's a seven-step process for getting an ex back. Like it's if you go to any breakup coach, any get your ex back coach, this is what they teach you, right? And so I put it in my book. This is how you do it. But then the next chapter after that is like, okay, you got her back, and it ended the same way. Now it's time to move on, right? And so the whole next of the book, next um or rest of the book rather, is all just about how do you actually forget your ex and get over her and work on your the your inner game and and and stuff like that. And then taking time to heal, because most guys don't do that. Most guys are trying to fill that void and try to get back to some semblance of normalcy, you know. So that and that's exactly what I was doing after my divorce and and actually after my initial breakup with Red Pill Chick, I was just trying to get back to that normal. And I didn't realize it how important it was to take time to heal and get used to being on your own and enjoying your own company. And and once you're able to do that, then you're ready to go out there and start dating again. And so uh, and then in the book, I actually give guys some game, like how to actually have some success on dating apps and and find the right women and some actual strategy there that most guys don't do. So um I'm I'm hoping that guys read this book and really fundamentally change how they see dating and relationships forever after this, so that they never actually get to this point again.

SPEAKER_00: 15:32

Yeah, yeah, like you said, you're just gonna repeat the same patterns. And I they do say at least six months of a break is helpful to like really figure itself out. And I know I did that before as well, and definitely learned a lot.

SPEAKER_01: 15:43

Did you find that helpful?

SPEAKER_00: 15:44

Yeah, definitely. I mean, I've I met a totally different person after that, like a different kind of person, you know, and it's just like much like much better. Yeah. Good. And I learned from starting my podcast as well, just interviewing all the people and learning from each guest, and yeah, so it actually that's I I did that for years.

SPEAKER_01: 16:19

I um when I first started the podcast, I was just trying to get other authors and stuff in the space, mainly you know, selfishly, just so I can pick their brain, you know, like what so what do you think about this? You know, you know? Yeah.

SPEAKER_00: 16:32

So then have you read sorry, have you read uh Neil Strauss, The Truth?

SPEAKER_01: 16:36

I haven't read The Truth, but I've read the game.

SPEAKER_00: 16:38

Yeah. So he there's a follow-up to the game where he, you know, that was like the pickup artist stuff, followed them around. Right. He tried his um you know, alternative lifestyle stuff, thinking like that's what he needed to do, and then of course, full circle back to like basically learning about himself and healing and all that stuff. So it was pretty powerful coming from the guy that you know kind of blew up that whole world or like in a good way and made it made it famous.

SPEAKER_01: 17:03

Well, you know, uh the book The Game, a lot of people when they read the game, they're reading it for the pickup artistry and how cool that is. But I got something completely different out of that book. When I read that book, what I was finding was that a majority of those guys, the pickup artists, they were really looking for a deeper connection. They they didn't want to just sleep with random girls all the time. And but the but those guys, all of their their stuff was all surface level stuff. It was all tips and tricks, and they were doing it, they were targeting specific women that they knew would be more susceptible to their antics. So they were looking for you know party girls uh at the club with big hoop earrings and wearing provocative clothing and stuff. They weren't doing it on just the average girl at the supermarket, you know? Yeah. And then when they would get in these relationships, they had no uh what we call mental frame. They had they had no um, you know, sense of purpose. They had no, it was all it was all a facade. Everything that they were doing was was flash and no substance. And they couldn't keep these women around, you know, more than a couple of weekends, and it was crushing them, and especially uh Mystery. Mystery, it was like he was basically borderline insane half the time because he was really pining over the one girl, like naughty or something. I can't remember what her name was. He was he was just always pining for this one girl, and I think a lot of guys read that, they're like, Well, why is he so upset by this? Because you know, he can have any girl he wants. It's like, no, but he can't have that girl, and he's got this what we call one itis for this one girl. And so what I I just I just found it was uh the my biggest takeaway was these guys never developed that inner game that made them attractive human beings, you know, at a deeper level that women actually wanted to be around for the long term.

SPEAKER_00: 18:57

Yeah, and it sounds like your book is what covers that part of it. Yeah, well, I at least try to, yeah. Or at least more than the other one did. Yeah. So you want to talk more about the book or talk about some other books that you wrote, or to how you coach or how to reach you, whichever one you want to go next.

SPEAKER_01: 19:14

Oh, no, no, that's good. Um, well, I could talk about my other books too, real quick. So the book right before this, so this is a part of a series. I'm writing a three-book series, and this is book two in the series. And the way I'm doing this is it's kind of a uh a which way guide, right? So the first book in the series is uh this one, which is called Get Her to Fuck You Again. And so this is a a red pill guide to fix a dead bedroom. And uh a lot of people there's basically two main avenues guys find their selves find themselves in um when they're when they find their way to the red pill space. One is they're married and their their wife isn't intimate with them anymore for whatever reason. And so they're just googling online, like how do I get her to bang me again, right? Or whatever. And so uh that's what this book is about. This book is actually about trying to fix your marriage because uh a lot of people just don't realize the absolute hell uh and the the meat grinder of family court is, especially for men. It's really unfavorable for men. And and it's it's interesting because people might argue that the the laws aren't really written against men, they're written against uh the higher earner, the higher uh the person who brings in the most money. Well, the funny thing is that uh women women's nature, they have uh uh their their their primary sexual strategy is what we call hypergamy. And and it's not a bad thing. A lot of people think hypergamy is this evil thing. It's it's not, it's just it's just the way the world works. But women are typically looking for guys that uh can protect and provide, they make more money. You know, you you will you will never see a boss babe, you know, high high earning uh female attorney dating a Starbucks barista. Like you'll never see it see that happen because women are attracted to guys that are above them. So maybe um, and I say above them, like in this case, monetarily, right? Yeah, and so so typically women are are marrying guys that are that earn more than them. And so when you apply the laws to that, the guys get screwed at you know, a lot of the time. And so um, what I'm trying to do is try to help guys who didn't get the memo that maybe marriage isn't the best idea for men, and they pulled that trigger and they're in uh the circumstance, uh a lot of them can turn this around. Like, so so I'm of the mind of well, why if you if you can, you absolutely should try to save your marriage. So this book is all about how to really reignite that attraction with your wife again. Because the reason why she's not having sex with you, it's not uh she's tired all the time, it's not that she's low libido, it's not that she's uh you know has hormonal issues. I mean, it might be part of that, but in in reality, if she truly desired you, she would find a way, you know, to fix it. She's just not motivated to fix it because she doesn't like you that much anymore. So this book will show shows guys how to reestablish their attractiveness with their wife again, you know. But uh not all not all relationships can be saved. So I'm very honest with the reader in that regard, where you go through all this stuff, you level up, you're learning how to be a better communicator, you're learning how to handle her her tests, you're you're learning how to not get angry at every little thing and have some emotional control and all this kind of stuff. By the end of the book, after you've done all this work, you look at your wife. A lot of the times, by this time, um, she's inspired to get on board and start working on herself and start, you know, making a change, and then everyone's happy. That's when guys turn their marriages around, that's what happens. But not, but sometimes women are just so far checked out that they're not getting on board.

unknown: 23:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 23:09

Well, at that point, you got to realize uh you've life is too short, and you and there's no reason to stay in a marriage that's that's bad for you. And now you can be more on the offensive as opposed to being on the defensive, and you can actually make this uh you know divorce happen on your terms on in a in a better situation that way. So the second book is for guys that couldn't turn their marriage around, right? So now they're in the now they're divorced and now they're back on the dating circuit and uh now they need to learn how to move on. So that's what this book's about. And then I'm currently in the process of writing the third book, which is going to be called, it's gonna be called Keep Your Bitch, uh, a red pill guide to relationships. And that one is gonna be both those books. If you were able to turn your marriage around in the first book, that the third book is this the next book that you're gonna want to read. If uh you weren't able to turn it around and you so you've you read forget that bitch, and now you've uh you've met a woman that you're you've identified as your contender um for a long-term relationship, then the third book's gonna be the next book for that one too. And so that one's just all gonna be about maintaining uh a healthy relationship and keeping that attraction going for the long term. And that I'm shooting to have that out by December.

SPEAKER_00: 24:27

Okay. And what what can you share some things that that are in the third book just as far as keeping like what you just said, what you're trying to help people see?

SPEAKER_01: 24:37

Honestly, a lot of it is going to be a mix of the first two books. Um, because in uh in in Get Her to Fuck You Again, it a lot of it is how to um set the tone and actually lead the relationship and and do it from the model of uh what we call a captain and first officer dynamic, or I call it a captain and executive officer dynamic. And that we found in the space after trading notes with with guys and and back forums and stuff like that for the last 20 years that that's the most effective way to run a relationship. And and women tend to be happier in a relationship dynamic like that. And so uh a lot of it is just more of that type of uh how do how to do that, how to how to take her on dates, how to um how to flirt with her and and how to just keep that fun and uh excitement alive going long term and how to avoid complacency the most.

SPEAKER_00: 25:35

Yeah. I how would you say is best for a woman to approach, I mean, I don't you're you usually talk about the opposite where the woman doesn't want to have sex, but what if a how would a man want a woman to approach for sex?

SPEAKER_01: 25:50

Well, that's that's one thing that I I talk about a lot because a guy it a woman can do whatever she wants, she can she can approach however she wants, and a guy will be cool with it, he would just be happy that she's up she's approaching. So I think a lot of women get in their head about that sort of thing, because that's not it's not natural to them to to be the initiators. Like that when it comes to dating, it's women aren't out there shooting their shot all the time, they're out there sort of like, Oh, I hope this guy notices me. And so they sort of put themselves in their the guy's vicinity hoping that he'll say something, right? That's that's girl game, you know. But but and guys are clueless to that sort of thing. So um for women, I would say you can you can initiate however, however, um it's gonna be well taken 99.9% of the time. Uh for guys, um, what I tell them, because a lot of guys, what they'll do is they'll get in their head of I want her to initiate more. And so they they think if I stop initiating, she's going to initiate more. And that's not what happens. Like it what happens is sex just dries up, it just stops happening. And so what I tell guys is like, look, it's just not, it's just not in your wife's nature to initiate all the time. So if you want more sex, like you need to initiate more. You need to be the one that's seducing her, you need to be the one that's doing uh what do we call kino escalation throughout the day. And don't just wait until bedtime and go, okay, well, now it's 10 o'clock, it's sexy time, because women can't just flip it on like a like a like a light switch, like men can. Um, you have to sort of prime the pump throughout the day, get her in the mood first. And so that's what I I teach guys how to do that um in the book, so that by the time it is bedtime, she's just as ready for it as you are, you know. And I'm like, if you do that enough, she's going to initiate plenty. You don't have to worry about it.

SPEAKER_00: 27:43

Yeah, yeah, definitely. Yeah. Do you want to talk about your podcast or how people can work with you as a coach?

SPEAKER_01: 27:51

Yeah, well, yeah, we can do that. So um, if you want to check out my podcast, uh, it's best to just go to comeonmanpod.com, www.comonmanpod.com. That will uh take you to my my gumroad page where I have um I have free ebooks there that you can download. Um, one for if you're in a dead bedroom situation, one if you're in a breakup situation. They're both free. Uh one's called She's Made You Weak, and the other one's called Um Fine, Here's How You Get Her Back. Actually, um break down the seven-step process to get your ex back in that one for the guys in a breakup. Uh, you can you can hire me from coaching there, and then you can also check out my podcast. I have new episodes every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday on all the major podcast platforms, and the show is called the Come On Man Podcast.

SPEAKER_00: 28:39

Okay. And do you have any like final takeaways you want the listeners to get from what you've shared?

SPEAKER_01: 28:46

I would say the biggest thing that I would teach guys um when it comes to when it comes to a breakup is you need to reevaluate whether you want to get your ex back and start focusing more on getting yourself back. I think that's the biggest takeaway I'd want guys uh to get from this episode.

SPEAKER_00: 29:12

Okay. Well, thank you very much for being on. Good information, of course. And yeah, I know the titles might offend some women or some people, but like you said, you gotta be catchy to it's not written for women.

SPEAKER_01: 29:24

So but uh but I'll tell you what, if you if you have a lot of female listeners, um, a lot of women do have brothers out there, they have uncles, they have fathers that go through this sort of thing and they can see it. Like women, women sort of can sniff out the badness in other women better than men can, right? And so a lot of women will see a guy just pining over over their ex, and she'll be like, Man, you just need to move on. You just need to move on. And so if if if that's uh a woman in your audience and she's got a a guy friend or a brother or something like that, like recommend this book for him because that will help him through, I think, more than anything.

SPEAKER_00: 30:03

Yeah, yeah. Hearing it from someone neutral too. But yeah, books definitely do that. All right. Well, thank you very much for being on. And if you love this episode, be sure to tell your friends about it and rate it as well. And thank you again, Paul, for being on.

SPEAKER_01: 30:15

Thanks, Tamara. I appreciate it.

SPEAKER_00: 30:17

Alright, and don't forget to check out his site website. Alright. Thanks everyone.

SPEAKER_01: 30:22

Frank Talk! Frank Talk! Sex and dating educates!