Recovery Works Better When We Walk Together

Recovery feels different when someone who has walked the same road shows you where the ground is solid. We sit down with peer supporter Chantel Bellingham to unpack how lived experience can cut through shame and build trust fast.

Chantel has been on the show to share her journey with addiction and how her experience is now her superpower.

Transcript

Why Peer Support Matters

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Peer support, people living with lived experience, is a powerful way to support people who want to talk about their mental illness and addiction. Chantal Bellingham is using her experience to work as a peer supporter. And she is on the show today with me to talk about that work. Hi, Chantal. Thank you for coming back on the show again. We've spoken before about your life leading up to and through your addiction to sobriety. And today we're going to talk about your peer support work, but just to um remind people, can you talk a little bit about what happened with you as you more when you got to the um post-high school when your drug use sort of really started and kicked up?

SPEAKER_01 0:52

Yes. Hi, Janice. Thank you so much for having me. Um so yeah, I went off to college straight out of high school. Um, I studied social service work, wanted to be an addictions counselor. Um, and I ended up getting into the partying lifestyle. I started experimenting with different substances and very, very quickly um found opiates, which sent me down um a road of a lot of um hardship and trouble and addiction off and on for about seven years after that. Um I had met someone that was quite a bit older than me and we were dating. He also struggled a lot with substances, and then it created a very codependent drug-fueled relationship. So I yeah, so that was for about seven years. Um I did still graduate uh and get my social services diploma. I'm not quite sure how, but I did. I really struggled through my last semester, but I did get my diploma. I worked in the field often on throughout my addiction, uh, mostly off, though. I wasn't able to really maintain a job considering I was on such heavy substances. Uh, I did um get on methadone to help with that, um, and was able to have belts of stability and sobriety through that. Um, but it was definitely a roller coaster off and on until um I got found myself in some legal trouble and finally decided to go to rehab, which is where I ended up finding long-term sobriety after getting the help that I needed and really working on myself and my mental health and all the underlying issues that were causing me to use, um, is when I ended up really finding long-term sobriety. Um, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 2:45

Did you did you when you were studying to be an addiction counselor and you were using substances at the same time, did it occur in your brain, like what, you know, here I am taking this program to be an addiction counselor, and yet I'm addicted to substances myself.

SPEAKER_01 3:06

So 100% felt like the biggest hypocrite in the world for wanting so valley to work in this field and then becoming like seeing the other side of the table, so to speak. Like I felt like such a hypocrite um walking into my placement, knowing that I was up using the whole night before, and then walking in and trying to do the role of a social service worker. Um, I ended up stepping down from my placement. Uh, I I thankfully my supervisor, the person supervising my placement passed me, uh, thank God. Um, but I I didn't, I don't think I deserved that pass. But uh I did end up having to step out of my placement because I just I felt like such a hypocrite using substances and then going and trying to to do this role. Um, but that's where peer support comes in as well, though, and why it's so important. Because I feel like I was living such a double or trying to live a double life. I feel like everyone around me knew and I thought I was hiding it. That I look back now, there was definitely so many signs people knew. Uh but I yeah, I really think.

SPEAKER_00 4:11

We think nobody knows, but actually I thought I did so well. Yeah, uh, but actually every everybody does. Well, physically you start to look bad, right? You're not dressing well, you may be losing weight, that kind of thing, and but but you don't see it yourself. We often don't see when we look in the mirror what other people see when they're when they're looking at us. Uh so you worked a little bit in that field, and then what was the transition to peer support worker? Like maybe explain to me first what a peer support worker does, and what is what the role of a C peer support worker is compared to, say, a therapist.

What A Peer Supporter Does

SPEAKER_01 4:49

Yes. So a peer support worker is a person with lived or living experience, minus past tense um lived experience, as I'm now in sobriety, but you can be a peer support worker still in active addiction as well. Um, and that person um shares their experience, knowledge, wisdom of drug use or sobriety with clients who are also struggling um with substance use in varying forms. And uh you just provide a so you're not a counselor or a therapist, um, but you're just someone that has been down that road, um, understands from a personal level and can provide insight from that perspective. And I find oftentimes a lot of clients appreciate being able to talk to someone that's been through it and understands on that level, because there's a lot of things that are hard to talk about with someone that's never been through them. So I find uh the comfortability level um is a lot different. Um, and my clients really like appreciate that aspect of my role. Uh so yeah, it's it's a little different than a therapist, it's more of a um like a relatability factor.

Beyond Twelve Steps

SPEAKER_00 6:03

Yeah. So is it it's it's sort of like the with the concept of a 12-step program, right? Which is sort of where peer support started and and then has has grown from. Um but peers uh 12-step programs still exist and they're and you know, there's uh there's an iconix anonymous. So um it's is is it uh it's similar to that in that it's a it's it's you uh in single with a single person but also in a group helping people talk about. So it's not just you talking at them, right? It's it's an exchange of ideas.

SPEAKER_01 6:42

Yeah, so I uh I do individual and I also help co-facilitate groups uh as well. Um, but yeah, it I can see the similarities between 12-step. Um I I don't follow the the 12-step in in my work, it's just not the outline that I use, but uh I do see the similarities like with sponsor, sponsor sort of thing, lived experience. It's it's similar in that sense, but um, I don't follow a 12-step um plan.

Training And Certificates

SPEAKER_00 7:08

Oh yeah, yeah, well, it's very prescribed, right? You know, you literally start at step one and you work your way through through those steps, and that's um so when you trained as a peer support worker, what was the the training like? What what did what did it entail?

Roles At CASON And Groups

SPEAKER_01 7:27

So there's actually no specific training class, diploma, degree, anything that you need to be a peer support worker. The only real requirement is to have some form of lived or living experience with substances. That's the only requirement to be a peer support worker. However, there are courses that you can take. Um, there's a lot of online ones. I think they're online. I don't think I've seen an in-person one. There probably is one. I just haven't seen it. Um to you can get a certificate in peer support work. It'll give you the framework of like a little bit more theory of how addiction works in the brain and whatnot and how to work with certain people and stuff like that. I'm actually in the process of taking a peer support worker certificate. Um, I'm a little bit different. Um, most people that get into this field uh like get into it, take a peer support certificate. I have my social services diploma and my psychology degree, and then I'm now taking a peer support certificate. Uh, so I had a bit of the background knowledge as well as the lived experience. Um, but yeah, there's a lot of different ways you can get into it. But the only real requirement is to have been through an addiction yourself, um, addiction or mental health, because you can have a mental health peer support worker as well. Um, and that's really the only requirement to do this job. It helps to have a certificate, though, to have like a deeper understanding and a different level of understanding. But yeah, the only real requirement is to have lived through it.

SPEAKER_00 8:54

Well, you work for uh community addiction services of Niagara, and there are a lot of programs there. Um, but there are there are day programs, and I think there's individual counseling and group counseling.

unknown 9:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 9:09

And so are do you participate as a peer worker in in both of those, the day treatment and um and so individual and and group?

SPEAKER_01 9:17

Um so right now I mostly do individual. I meet with people one-on-one. Um, I do co-facilitate a group called Choices for Change. It's online. Um we work through um understanding your emotions, understanding your needs, and understanding change. It's a three-week program. Uh, we kind of go through those topics. And I also um sit in on Smart Recovery, which is um a group for people struggling with substance use, wanting to make changes to their substance use. Um, we all sit in on a group, um, we do a check-in, we all kind of just talk about our issues for the week, that sort of thing. I find my lived experience really helps in that group. Um but yeah, those other groups I do, but I mostly do individual uh sessions right now. I only work 10 hours a week there. So it's hard to fit everything in that I want to do with the peer support role, uh, just because it is my part-time job right now.

Part-Time Peer Work, Full-Time Care

SPEAKER_00 10:12

Which you're moving in pro presumably to be more of a full-time role, maybe not at Casson, but some somewhere that that's that's your goal is to be.

SPEAKER_01 10:21

I have a um a full-time job as a community mental health worker um so in the falls, and I work at a permanent um supportive living program, or I do like my my title is not peer support worker, but I do use my lived experience often in that role. Any role in this field, um I obviously come from a background of lived experience, and my passion and drive comes from my lived experience. So I do use it um in any role I've really worked in in this field over the years. Um, so yeah, that's I work with people um struggling with addiction and mental health in my full-time role as well. Uh doing you're not too busy.

SPEAKER_00 11:00

Oh no, I can you need to pace yourself, Chantel. You need to make sure you pace yourself.

How Clients Enter Peer Support

SPEAKER_01 11:04

I said this earlier in my other um in our first interview that for me, for my sobriety, keeping myself busy is the the my biggest way of of maintaining my sobriety. And uh, you know, I take it to extremes. So I I I work a lot, I but I really have a passion and drive and love for this field and for the people that I work with.

SPEAKER_00 11:24

So when somebody comes to you, um do they need to be sober? Do they need to be um uh not using substances, or is that something that you help someone work through? And and and I guess maybe you could just explain when somebody comes to you, what's the the process that they go through to get involved? Um, and how do you how do you help someone uh well I guess first of all, does the person have to be um not using substances, or do you have people who come in who are still using substance and looking for help to start?

Options: Harm Reduction To MAT

SPEAKER_01 12:06

Absolutely not. Um you can be anywhere in your recovery journey um from pre-contemplative up to, you know, you've been sober for a while. Um, so I get my referrals. So we have um counselors at Casson, and I normally get my referrals through them. There's also an outreach worker that I've gotten a few referrals from as well. So from the other staff at Casson. Uh so normally you would have to have been in some other program. I'll get a referral for someone looking for peer support, and then I'll reach out to you. We'll have a quick chat. I'll I'll explain what my role is, kind of what we do, the things that are in my realm and what we can work on together. And if that's something you're interested in, I try to set up an in-person meeting, whether that's in the office. For some people, offices are uncomfortable, so I don't mind meeting like the downtown area. I've met at like the coffee shop downstairs, things like that. It's a little more informal and personal. Um, and then oftentimes we just discuss like our shared experiences, my lived experience, what I did um in early recovery. I find a lot of people what they're reaching out for is okay, like I want to stop or change my substance use, but like, what am I gonna do with my time? What do, you know, what do people do in sobriety? It's boring. Uh so I find a lot of the things I work on is finding out what people like to do, hobbies, giving suggestions, uh, is sharing what I did in early recovery, what worked for me, uh, you know, the different options that they have. There's so many options in recovery, whether you want to follow 12-step, whether you want medical assisted treatment, um, even harm reduction. I've given um, you know, ideas and options for harm reduction. We have a safe injection site in St. Catharines, which is such an incredible resource. Uh, you know, we have harm reduction supplies. We have a van that delivers, you know, the different doctors in the area that I would suggest because I've used different ones in the area for like methadone or suboxone, uh, you know, those different clinics. Um, I have the ones that I recommend, um things like that, different counselors that I I suggest, or things like all the like or the issues in early recovery. Um, I try to share my personal experience and what I did, what worked for me, what didn't work for me, what I think, you know, my opinions of what I think would work for them. Um, and just kind of being that listening ear that that understands when when you slip up, because I've personally been there and done that myself. Uh, I feel like they find they feel a little less judgment from me because they know I can say, Yep, been there, done that. I did the exact same thing, I get it. Um, so I find that they really appreciate that factor of my role.

Relapse Without Judgment

Addiction Affects Every Walk Of Life

SPEAKER_00 14:48

Um, I guess the last thing you want to have happen is that um somebody um uses again and doesn't want to come back to you because they're ashamed or they feel like they're going to get kicked out of the program or something like that. Can one of the questions that comes up all the time or some of the observations that people have, and it's it's not because they're mean people, it's an understanding from the community at large. But um, we tend to think that people who are um addicted to substances and would be say coming to you are um unhoused and they don't have a place to live. But my understanding is that the the majority of people who have for whatever life reason um have become um addicted to opioids, have a home. And maybe it's because they got, you know, they had surgery and they were given pain medication or something like that. What's your experience with that?

SPEAKER_01 15:51

I have met people from all walks of life, um, from people that are unhoused to people that were really, really successful, um, have more money than I'll ever see in my life, uh, also struggle with addiction. I've seen all walks of life from one end to the other end of the spectrum, struggle with addiction. Addiction doesn't discriminate. I've seen all classes, all races, religions, whatever. I've seen all people um struggle with addiction. So it doesn't, it doesn't, it's not just unhoused people. I think with the unhoused population, it's more in your face and you have to see it more and and deal with it more. And maybe that's why people have that assumption. But that's not the case at all. It's happening behind closed doors everywhere. Um, so yeah, I that assumption to me is is is crazy because there's lots of people um from every class that struggle with addiction.

SPEAKER_00 16:46

Yeah, my um my um addiction was alcohol. And um I did learn from um and I went to a stealth-step program. That was my actually I I I went into treatment and then the 12-step program, but you know, it was quite a long time ago before I don't even know if peer support actually existed at the time. But it was um that drinking and and substances are the great leveler, right? Like you said, it doesn't discriminate by age, it doesn't discriminate by location, where you live, how old you are, how how much money you make, what your job is. Um, and uh a lot of people there's you know that concept of bottom hitting bottom, and I think that that people hear that. Most people sort of have heard that phrase hitting bottom. But again, we tend to think that bottom is when you've lost your home, you've lost your job, you've got you've lost your family, you've got nothing left, and that's what it takes to get someone to wake up and say, Um, I need help. But everybody's bottom is different.

Purpose And Motivation To Serve

SPEAKER_01 17:58

That's exactly you took the words out of my mouth. That was going to be exactly what I said. Everyone's rock bottom is different, and it really depends on the person what is going to do it for them to want to make changes to their substance use.

SPEAKER_00 18:13

How would they find out about a peer support um program and not not just at Casson, but um, you know, because there are different peer support programs in in even in Niagara. Some of them, uh the one I'm most familiar with actually is the peer navigator um support at the uh at the hospital, um, which is done by Cross Community Health Center. And that is specifically to meet someone who's coming into emergency and to help them navigate that system because it's all very scary. We've all been to emergency. We all know how hard it is to get around in there. And the idea there is that you meet with someone and that navigator, a peer navigator stays with the person throughout the process of admission into emergency, seeing a doctor, maybe admission into the hospital, and continues sometimes with the person if they are um admitted to hospital for a period of time. So there are different ways that peer support comes into it, but I'm I I'm guessing that the approach and the connection and and the and the desire on the on the part of the peer navigator is is kind of the same. Like that you're you you get up in the morning and you want to help someone, and you want to help someone in that specific way.

SPEAKER_01 19:32

Yeah, I feel like anyone that goes into peer support is doing it from the drive of wanting their experience to help someone. Uh, for me, it's like, you know, I I didn't go through all of this struggle and all of this pain to not make something out of it. That's what my drive in this peer support role is is I want if there's anything anybody can take from the struggle I went through that it I didn't go through it for nothing. So that's that's my drive for my peer support. Well, I can't speak to anybody else's, but I I would assume it's on the same wavelength as That's usually what I hear.

SPEAKER_00 20:05

Yeah.

Emotional Toll And Boundaries

SPEAKER_01 20:05

Most peer support workers get up and do this work because they want to for their struggle to have meant something, for it to have helped somebody.

SPEAKER_00 20:13

So you personally, do you find it that sometimes it just feels like overwhelming and and and it's uh uh like a heavy burden to carry in your heart? Because it's difficult day in and day out to be there. There are a lot of moments, I'm assuming, where it's you know, aha moments for you where you know that there's been some sort of a breakthrough, some sort of help happening there, but there must be other times where you're just not able to reach the person. And and those kinds of stories must be really hard.

Self-Care And Team Support

SPEAKER_01 20:52

Yeah, it can be. Uh, I also I find probably my the hardest part of my job is when I see a client like when I know exactly how much pain they're feeling or how upset they are. Like I've been in that exact situation and I'm watching them go through it. And I know there's nothing that I can do to change it, and they have to want the change for themselves, and they have to take the steps. Like, I can't, there's I can't do it for them. And all I want is for them to feel the the accomplishment or the or get to that stage of sobriety and having to sit and be very patient and watch them struggle and watch them get like be there to support, but knowing that like I can't just save them right away and and you know, so sometimes it's hard to to watch that process, but I I know that it's so important for them to go through. So that's what keeps me going and keeps me there and keeps me doing my job. But sometimes it can be really hard to watch, um, especially if I'm watching a scenario that I've lived through that's very, very similar, uh, just because it's it really hits home. I've had times where I've watched some of my clients. Go through or do things like exactly the same as I do. And it, you know, I'd have to take a step in my office after and be like, man, like I just that really hit home. Like, I know how she's feeling. Like, so yeah, there can be days that it's it's tough, but I know that I'm making a difference, and I know that through my addiction, I would have wanted someone there like me. And I know deep down that they they do appreciate me being there completely non-judgmental and there to listen. So that's kind of what keeps me going through. And self-care is really, really important in this field. I also have a wonderful coworkers, wonderful management. Um, everyone that I work with in this field is so understanding and caring and always checking in, making sure I'm okay and and whatnot. So I do really appreciate that too, because it's really important because it does, it does weigh on your mental health. Um, like I said, I have a pretty good self-care plan. Uh, I like to travel, I like to go to the gym, um, I try to eat healthy. I I say I try to sleep, that's that's not entirely true. I don't sleep very much. I should work on that part of myself.

Relapse As Part Of Recovery

SPEAKER_00 23:08

Yeah, you need to work on that part. That's that's so important. Um the so I just want to leave with with a couple of things. One is for the person who's coming in, you don't have to catch on the first time.

SPEAKER_01 23:24

No, not at all.

SPEAKER_00 23:25

It's gonna take you 120, however many times it it's okay to keep coming back. Yeah, because it's not like you go in, switch is flipped, and and and bang, you're you know, well into recovery and you're never going to use again.

Closing And Listener Resources

SPEAKER_01 23:41

Yeah. Well, relapse is part of recovery if you look at the recovery wheel. Uh, I have met the few miracle cases where someone did decide that they were gonna stop and they stayed in long-term recovery. Um, but that's very rare. I feel like I can't give an exact statistic, but the majority of people um do have relapses or lapses. I couldn't even put a number on the amount of times I tried before I was successful. It's gotta be in the hundreds, if not thousands. So it it does take a lot, but as long as you keep getting back up, keep coming back, keep trying, it will eventually stick.

SPEAKER_00 24:15

Chantal, thanks for coming on and and talking to me again. I really appreciate the work you do and and I and I appreciate you taking the time to talk again.

SPEAKER_01 24:24

Awesome. Thank you so much for having me. I do really appreciate being able to share my story on such a public platform.

SPEAKER_00 24:30

You can listen to all shows of Life Unscripted on your favorite podcast app or on my website at lifeunscripted.ca.