What If It Did Work?
What If It Did Work?
Finding Clarity in Chaos: The Kava and Kettlebells Approach
What if the answer to modern chaos isn't another biohack, supplement, or fitness trend? What if it's simply showing up consistently and doing the unglamorous work of discipline?
Charles and Heidi Hatley have built their lives around this counterintuitive wisdom. As the voices behind the Kava and Kettlebells podcast, they're redefining healthy living through authenticity rather than algorithms. In this riveting conversation, we explore why consistency trumps complexity every time – whether in fitness, parenting, or personal growth.
The Hatleys pull no punches discussing why most "influencers" offer empty promises while lacking results themselves. We dive into their 4 AM training routines, not because they love early mornings, but because they've built the mental fortitude to do what matters regardless of feeling. As Heidi powerfully states, "People think they want the body or the scale number. That's not what you want. You want the process and the lifestyle that comes with it."
Their journey extends beyond the gym. We explore their decision to replace alcohol with kava, a botanical alternative providing relaxation without destructive side effects. This choice wasn't about addiction but alignment – creating a lifestyle where they could be fully present for their children while modeling healthy choices.
Perhaps most compelling is their approach to education. Rather than merely complaining about the school system, they homeschool their children. This exemplifies their life philosophy: don't just identify problems—implement solutions. As they point out, our education system hasn't fundamentally changed since the 1880s, teaching compliance rather than crucial life skills.
If you're tired of chasing the latest trend only to find yourself back where you started, this conversation offers a refreshing alternative: build discipline, embrace consistency, find meaning in service rather than significance, and measure success not by followers but by lives changed.
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I never told no one that my whole life I've been holding back. Every time I load my gun up so I can shoot for the star, I hear a voice like who do you think?
Speaker 2:you are all right. Everybody. Another day, another dollar, another one of my favorite podcasts of my well, my favorite episode of my favorite podcast. I can't wait to talk to these two. I mean, if I actually ever got off my butt and put it like out video form. You guys, you guys are definitely eye candy. You guys play the part Because, let me tell you, there's a lot of. Whenever I go not in my CrossFit gym because I think they'd get killed, but whenever I go to a Globo gym and it's always those people that are barely lifting any weights and they have a little tripod up it's like what the hell are you guys doing, man? How can you be an influencer when you look like crap and you guys have horrible forms? But I digress. You can tell we're going to have an amazing conversation about everything.
Speaker 2:This is Heidi Hatley. In a world drowning in misinformation, oh my gosh, isn't that what we were just talking about? Two parents chose strength over stagnation, clarity over confusion and kava over cocktails. Charles and Heidi Hatley, the unapologetically authentic voices behind kava and kettlebells. The podcast redefining what it means to live healthy in today's chaos. He's a us air force veteran. Thank you for your service. Turned small business consultant, she'sa personal trainer, homeschooling mom hey, homeschooling is the way to go these days and brain injury survivor who fought her way back to strength. Literally Together they're raising kids, lifting heavy, sipping botanicals, in a cultural obsessed with alcohol. Every episode delivers real conversations, real experience, real solutions for overwhelmed parents we're all overwhelmed parents who want to cut through the bullshit, take back their health without sacrificing fun, family or faith. The three Fs that I love you guys aren't influencers, you guys are living the walk, talking the talk. Thank you for being on my show. What's up, guys?
Speaker 3:Yeah, thank you so much for having us, and we agree, as far as the influencers, that their little tripods in the gym drives us crazy. So we're with you.
Speaker 2:And isn't it always like when you go to a globo gym? It's like freaking ass packed already yeah and these guys have the.
Speaker 2:It's like you know. It's not like they're showing you how to, how to hit that 225 on your bench, that magical mark. It's always something crappy, like like a fly. Oh please, please, tell me how to do that. Can you please give me the proper form? It's like if you can't with those, it's like what next? Can you show me how to use the Smith machine and that I can possibly bench more on the Smith machine or do more squats, but yeah.
Speaker 4:Well, first they got to get the fit, you know.
Speaker 2:They got to showcase the fit, and then drive to the gym. Yeah, if you guys had it okay. But one it's like it's two things, these influencers. One it's a kid trying to be a life coach. He's like 20. He's not a parent, he's nothing.
Speaker 3:And he probably still lives at home with his parents. Yeah, 100%.
Speaker 2:He watched a couple grant cardone videos watch, you know, bought like a zigzagler book on how to sell both of them. Their ears are are ringing, zigzagler's rolling in his grave with these people and they're like oh yeah, we're here to to change the world. Man, move out of your basement, of your parents basement, and you change your own life. Man, how are you gonna be an influencer to me? And then also, yeah, the people at the gym, cause I, I love, I have a torn ACL so I can't do much squats. So whenever it's like a heavy squats at the CrossFit gym, I go to the Globo gym and that just drives me nuts when I see the tripod and and it's like, and they try to be like funny and and like cute and it's like man it. And once you hit one reel, like on social media, just to laugh at it, the algorithm's like oh my gosh, this guy really loves this stuff he must watch it 20 and it's no, I just want to.
Speaker 2:So, yeah, I get those reels like nonstop. It's like, please God, why I just want. I just wanted to watch one, just to laugh.
Speaker 3:I just want to, just want to peek at it and then, yeah, the algorithm just sucks you in and that's kind of part of our podcast is trying to. You know, cut through that that BS, and you know, none of these influencers influencers, some of them have some value, I would say a little bit, but but not very much. And so you know that's what our goal is to just shoot it to people straight and and let them know, honestly, you know what, what's real and what's not well also too.
Speaker 2:I mean, everybody's waiting for like the newest craze and exercise or how to lose weight.
Speaker 2:It's like peptides have been around forever but but all of a sudden you know it's, it's hip and it's like okay, guys, once you quit injecting yourself, you haven't fixed what's up here in your head. That's why you're overeating. That's what that's like. That's why, when you hear those stories about oh, the guy won 20 million in the lottery and he pissed it all the way because he didn't build the muscle on what it takes to earn it, he's not doing it on a consistent basis and someone that's like oh my gosh, I want to look like you two guys, but I want to be super thin. Let me just take Mungero or whatever. Well, you're not going to the gym, you're losing muscle, and when you can't pay for the 200, 300, I don't know how much I, a guy my age, only knows the TRT and the moral and stuff like that I don't know how much it costs, but I mean the money runs out, and then they're going to look like one of those ex-contestants on the Biggest Loser.
Speaker 4:Yeah, and I think a lot of it has to do with even going back to the fact of always looking for new craze. Right, I live, you know, I think now, especially this generation, the past 10, 20 years and I'm speaking even to ourselves as millennials like we got so used to social media. Social media is instant gratification. Used to, social media is social media, is instant graphication. It's, you know, you swipe, swipe, swipe, and you need to see everyone in their peak form for that day not realizing that's a photo shoot, right, and it's not. You know it's, it's cropped, it's been highlighted, all that kind of stuff. So now we live in this attention economy where people are always like what's the next thing? What's the next thing and being consistent is next thing.
Speaker 3:And being consistent is boring.
Speaker 4:Yeah, yeah, it's not sexy. Let's be real. Like going to the gym every day at 4 am and doing the same compound movements week after week and it sucks. That's not. It's not sexy.
Speaker 2:And it sucks, Doesn't it, Charles? When it's like small, All three of us. It's not like all of a sudden I'm going to hit a PR. Well one, I'm getting older but like, let's say, I was like in my 30s but I went every day. It's not like, oh my gosh, I just hit 50 pounds more on my PR. So, yeah, it's just that consistent. You, you see gains, but it's like so small, but both physical, both lifting weights, and then you know, you see someone I mean everybody's on a different path. Literally, somebody can hit a PR, Like, if you can't hit because I know a lot of people can't do a 45 pound bench, so you can go from that to all of a sudden doing 135. Well, that's like a holy smokes. But you know, in general, if you do the work on a consistent basis but nobody likes working out at the gym, but it becomes like a mindset. I mean, I haven't had a rest day, and it's not because I'm doing 75 hard. I used to do that because I thought one day it would create my happiness. My self-worth was based on goals, or andy frisola is just gonna be like hey omar you've
Speaker 2:done you. You've done my program so many times. I want you to be on my podcast. You, me, ed, my, let we're just invite the missus, we'll hang out with emily and we'll do a barbecue out in st louis. So you know it took.
Speaker 2:It took a while to realize. Yeah, you know, I can buy, I can buy the, buy the first form stuff and I can do the 75 hard challenge over and over. But at the end of the day, you, you know, as long as I'm happy, he's not. You know who cares. So, yeah, now, it's not that, you know, it's not people. If they hear that like, oh my God, he's doing another 75 day challenge, it's like no, you just do the work on a consistent basis. And it's like brushing your teeth. You, just you, you guys feel horrible, right, if you take like two rest days, three rest days in a row. I know literally my body feels like I ran a marathon or did like a, like a Spartan, like a super Spartan, if I take like two days off in a row, and I know it's mental.
Speaker 3:And it is.
Speaker 3:It's mental, and I think that's one thing that people are looking for is they're looking for it to just click for their body when they hear the idea that you know, oh, people love working out and they feel like it's just gonna click and that they're truly gonna enjoy it and it's gonna be like this magical experience and it's like, no, it's the mentality and it's the discipline that it builds, Like, if you can be disciplined enough to go to sleep you know, we are so blessed to be here with you, Omar, but this is close to our bedtime because we are up at 4 am.
Speaker 3:You know, if you're disciplined to be able to do that and go to the gym and eat, that's going to carry over into every other aspect of your life. But it's really hard for people to get over that hump and understand that they just have to push through it and they have to get that discipline and that's when they will enjoy the benefits that they see. Enjoy the discipline and the process. Like, enjoy the process, enjoy being someone who works out, not the body, Like they think they want the body, they think they want the scale. That's not what you want. You want the process and the lifestyle that comes with it.
Speaker 2:Well, people want the significance. Oh my God, heidi you look so amazing. And you know what, even if life was like that? Because everybody, you know, deep down inside we want the cyber hugs and we want the kudos, but overall you have to do it for yourself because it's not like they're going to be. You know, a half hour later, guys have a dinner party and they're you know what charles and heidi. Man, I gotta say they look amazing, don't you think? No, they're everybody's into their own thing.
Speaker 4:So and I think too, man, like even going back to, like, let's talk. You like the, the aesthetics, like the visuals, right, working out. A lot of people you know start for that and I, you know, at the same time, I think it's okay to want to look good, you know. But I think what people you know misinterpret they. They think of this like goal and anything else in life. When you get there, great, it feels, good, we'll celebrate, but then it's like all right, what's next? Keep on moving on.
Speaker 4:It's the same thing with physique, and people go with a mindset of you know, I gotta look like, you know this guy or this girl. Well, when you get there, I can promise you you're gonna look at yourself and you'll be like, well, maybe I can add, you know, a millimeter to my biceps, or maybe I can, you know, do this and look this way, or maybe I can lose a little bit more fat, like you're never truly satisfied in some way. I think that's the beauty of not just working out but life right, like if, if you're constantly just meeting a goal and you're satisfied with that, then well, I guess just stop working out or, you know, stop making money or stop doing this, stop spending time with your family. You know what's the point of, you know, reaching this thing if there's not a process and a journey to it, and that's why I shall sleep. You know people too.
Speaker 4:It's like it's not just about the looks like, yeah, it's great if you want to look great, naked, great, but it's about the process and it's about the hard work and you never want to be satisfied, you know well and, and I'll bet you, uh, you're gonna have the same answer that I know you guys are gonna give, because to me it was always.
Speaker 2:It wasn't about me. I, I had two daughters and I started running marathons, I started doing Spartans, I started everything from since. They never saw me as a couch potato, they never saw me as, hey, I'm going to binge watch Netflix all day and do absolutely not. Oh, hey, let's go to McDonald's. Do I go eat horrible ones in Blue Moon? Yeah, I'm human. I don't walk on water. I'm not St Peter either. So here's the question you guys, your kids, live an active lifestyle, correct? They're healthy. They don't look like the morbidly obese kids that you see out there these days playing PlayStation 20 or whatever the number's up to these days.
Speaker 4:Yeah, xbox or whatever it is, man, it's like back to the nintendo handheld now too.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I've seen that. I think it's called the switch or something yeah I keep on hearing like in the background switch.
Speaker 2:So my kids have never played video games. So I mean, from an early age they went all the way to travel soccer until my oldest grad. She's a sophomore at LSU, but it was never. It was never. Like what those delusional parents oh my God, my kid's going to be the next Mia Hamm or whatever BS you know it was.
Speaker 2:I always wanted them healthy and I always wanted them to compete because, you know, starting with the millennials, it was who cares, man, all these new, we don't need to keep score, you know, as long as everybody has fun. I remember putting my oldest it's a franchise, it's I nine. They're like, really, she was really small and it's like, and I was the coach and like, please, whatever you do, you can't keep score and you're always supposed to give, get this. You give the medal of the game not to the person that does the best. It could be the kid that does absolutely nothing but picks grass or just sits there because you want to empower them, you want to feel special, so sit. So just give it to that kid. I'm like that kid's going to learn mediocre how to be mediocre. That kid's going to learn. Just show up, that kid's going to learn. Yeah, hey, boss, I don't have to do the work. Or hey, I showed up. Man, we didn't get the goals in, but hey, we all had fun, we're all here, we're all having a good time. Yeah, that's.
Speaker 2:My biggest complaint is like, yeah, entitlement and also being a Gen X and I guess all the boomers raised like the young kids, that everybody's special, everybody should be president. Everybody can be. Yeah, you can be, but if you work your ass off you can't just show up. It's like going to the gym yeah, sure you can, can be, but if you work your ass off you can't just show up. It's like going to the gym yeah, sure you can look like jay cutler, sure you can look like ronnie coleman, but you just can't show up and do like a hit class for a half hour. Or do you guys remember those bow flex commercials?
Speaker 2:oh my god, yeah, just 30 minutes three times a week and you'll look shredded. And they had, they always had the hot chick and the hot girl, the hot guy. They're like zero body fat, just doing yeah I got only 90 minutes a week and I'll look like that holy smokes I do.
Speaker 4:um, I do want to say, though, like going back, um, we originally asked us, you know, about our girls, because you know we have two girls, uh, and you know they're younger right now. But I think, overall, right, it's a reflection on parents and, like you know, video games. Last time I played a video game was in college. My roommate had a, you know, ps3 at the time, or whatever it was, and so you know, I think kids are so impressionable. It's something that you know, I think a lot of parents they take for granted kind of their routine and how it pleases them, but versus, all right, how does it, you know, portray onto my kids? So when you demonstrate, whatever it is, you know, if there's a dad sitting around at work playing video games, his son will be like, well, all right, cool, that's what I do. I come home, I expect my wife to have everything done for me, then I eat and I go play video games.
Speaker 3:Pop open a couple beers.
Speaker 4:I'm sure, and that's life.
Speaker 2:That's what my dad did. I mean, I was an entrepreneur for 20 years. I couldn't imagine just coming home and, you know, not thinking of marketing, not thinking of creating market share, if I was just like you know what the new john madden's out man and I gotta say I'm I'm to spend the next week or so and I'm going to buy the book on the cheat codes and, man, I'm going to beat this machine. Or now I guess you can play people from all over the world. I mean, that's got to be such a great feeling knowing that you're beating some 40-year-old dude in his underoos, living in his parents' being a burden, you know being being entitled because he wasn't homeschooled it goes, I don't know man.
Speaker 4:It goes back to that whole just, I'm not here, I'm not gonna, like you know, preach and say that every once in a while, like, yeah, I like to, you know, chill out and watch netflix, like sometimes I just like you're human, I didn't think exactly lived like 100 clean living and you guys never watched tv and you guys are like amish.
Speaker 2:It was just working out raising your kids, working out doing the business stuff, and then that's it. No man, we're we're. I mean, of course, we're human, of course. Who doesn't like pizza?
Speaker 1:Who doesn't?
Speaker 2:like some gourmet donut. That's like 3000 calories, I mean.
Speaker 4:I think what drives us kind of both. I don't want to say crazy, right. And you know, we're getting to the point where it's like you got to understand the why behind it, why the person has this behavior. But you know, even talking to people, you know I'm a big investor, you know I started trading back in college and, um, you know I I think financial literacy is an issue in our country. Obviously it's not taught in schools, right, then kids are all at all, and then they're released, you know, as an 18 year old, and they have no idea.
Speaker 4:But, all right, we all hold a super computer in our palms every day that most people spend, you know the majority of the day on. So I talk to people and I'm like, well, how do you know what a mutual fund is, or an etf, or do you have a 401k or a roth or aage account? And they're like, what? Like, what is that? I don't, I don't have time to learn about investing. But yet the same person who told me that just told me they're spending all weekend on Sunday football. They just finished a season of whatever Netflix. So I'm like, so you're telling me you have time to do all that, but you can't spend 30 minutes on google learning about something that's productive.
Speaker 2:you want to hear something crazy for all these people, and it's it's called, since they're on their phone, their social media, stalking their exes or their. They have to put their social views or their political views or ranting on why their life sucks, because it's never my fault, it's always some politician or some hypocrite there's no ownership.
Speaker 2:Yeah, zero ownership, that if you start watching, because on Instagram if you just watch one or two reels or videos on ETFs or on compounding or on investing, it'll flood you. And I mean, heck, I'm showing my age. You know what? I was a financial advisor for years. I started investing at 18, when it was legal, but it was because I read a Peter Lynch book on from the guy from fidelity, all those books, and it's like I literally had to go drive my ass to Walden books this is predating Barnes and Noble find a book, buy it, go all the way home.
Speaker 2:Or if I was poor and I had to go to the library and go to the Dewey decimal system and do all that nonsense. But now you're right and you're like OK, well, I don't know what reels are, I can't do that. But you do know how to go on YouTube and watch videos of dudes kicking each other in the balls or all sorts of stuff. But you can't how to invest, how to make a million dollars by only DCA and dollar cost averaging. And they have all those reels at whatever age.
Speaker 2:And it's not like saying, hey, you need to do options. It literally is idiot proof, if anything, on how to do that. That's why I'm saying if somebody's like, well, I don't know how to get how to lower my body fat, I mean shit. Like I said, literally I have a degree in journalism, so I had to go to library science for a whole year, which meant learning how to get all these materials, or like literally anything, if you want to be personal development, you can download it, like now I laugh and tell people if you're suicidal. You could get Anthony Robbins personal power rush delivery in only two weeks. So you better not kill. You better like yeah, right, but but back then, yeah, now you're right, but everybody focuses on stuff that doesn't serve them.
Speaker 4:Yeah, exactly, and I think you see this a lot with, specifically, your clients and and shifting that mindset yeah, I think it's.
Speaker 3:it's just always the what was me mindset and everything is so hard, I don't have time, and always just finding excuses instead of and really just the mindset, like I think just society in general needs to shift their mindset with you know, again that ownership, taking ownership of how, how did I get to this place, like, what role did I take, instead of looking at everyone else and blaming everyone else? What decisions did I make to get to this place and what decisions am I going to make to get out of it? And that's what I think people have a hard time doing.
Speaker 2:Heidi, you could have played victim. It says here in the notes brain. You're a brain injury survivor. You could have just packed it up, packed it in and just gotten on your soapbox and said do you know what it's like? Do you know I have a brain injury? Because everybody always wants to—life isn't fair, for starters. But everybody wants to say well, you know why someone else is ahead. Well, you know we all dealt—you had those cards handed to you and clearly you know we all dealt. You had those cards handed to you and clearly you overcame that. Clearly. And I need to know about the kava because I tried it a couple of times in Fiji. I don't know if it's an acquired taste.
Speaker 4:We'll get you on the right spot.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 4:We got you.
Speaker 3:So it tastes. You know it's called mud water for a reason.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, for sure it tastes a little like mud water, but it's.
Speaker 3:And kava is a little different because it is different than alcohol in that it has a reverse tolerance as well, and so with alcohol, if you haven't drank it in a long time, you just have one drink you're going to feel it, whereas kava it's the reverse effect, so you might have to drink it a few times or drink a lot of it before you actually feel it. So a lot of people that it tastes so bad. They taste it once or twice, they don't feel the effects and they say what the heck? This is worthless and they stop, which I'm assuming is what you did.
Speaker 2:And well, no, I was. I was literally, literally Fiji with, with my ex-wife for a week. We're doing like a a life in the health seminar and it was on wheatgrass, which I can tolerate, but you know the Fijians do it for tribal and so it's like every day you're like, oh yeah, bula. And you know the cool part is like when you get that tingly, that numb taste it feels like. Yeah, but but the actual drinking of it is like, yeah, it's not sipping tea.
Speaker 4:It's not like yeah.
Speaker 2:You're not like oh my gosh, this is amazing. How did you make this? Because your recipe is way better. But yeah, no, it's, it's, it's good. And I have to ask you about, about the kava. Did you guys?
Speaker 4:you guys were drinkers and you switched it to kava, or you guys were never drinkers and you were on the right path on that one I mean, I think, like when we were younger, like we drank, not like I would say excessive, but you know, I think at an early age we both found you obviously right the detrimental effects of alcohol. I think everyone who's drinking understands a hangover. If you're in the fitness, you understand that's going to set you back a couple days in the gym and you know, for us it was just never a big thing and we also, didn't, like, you know, being around drunk people and the, the effects that it gives you and you know, not having kind of a clear mind, and the thing with kava is kava acts on your gaba receptors just like alcohol does. So it gives you those feelings of, you know, relaxation, a little bit of, you know, social uplifting, all that, but it in that it can't get you drunk, gives you hangover. In fact it's studied right now for a lot of metabolic benefits, you know, versus alcohol, which we know now is linked to about seven uh cancers directly.
Speaker 4:Um, that info just kind of came out in the last year, right. So you know, for us, like we never had an alcohol problem, um, but it just we realized quickly it didn't fit into our lifestyle. But we still want something that we can, you know, drink at nighttime and help us relax and socialize. And you know, kind of on our search we found Kava and we heard about these things called Kava bars, where people go and it's like, you know, kind of the same thing as an alcohol bar, but people aren't getting the bar fights, they're not getting the wasted and DUIs. In fact it's much more relaxing, chill vibe.
Speaker 3:You actually remember the conversations you have. You don't get in fights and yeah, so we went to, and I think a lot of it too was we had kids. I think once you have kids, we were very young when we had kids, and kids don't care what you drank the night before.
Speaker 3:They are still going to be up at the exactly yeah, and we wanted to be present with our children like we wanted to be able to enjoy those years with our kids and not be distracted and forgetful, and obviously that's, you know, what alcohol does. So that was, I think, the biggest motivating factor for us was just our children and being able to again set that example for them and be present in their life, and it just fit.
Speaker 2:Yeah 100%.
Speaker 2:Well, well, it's a great thing. I mean, my, my two daughters have only seen me tops drink maybe two drinks and it's like two light beers. They've never seen me drunk because I don't. And you know, I went to school in louisiana, in the south. You know it's all about getting hammered and yeah, yeah, I don't want, I don't want my daughters that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you can be a social drinker. It it's not something it I do. I drink very rarely, but when I do, it's just because other people around me. But if I was to become Baptist, I guess, or you know, jesus told me himself in St Peter not to drink alcohol. It's not something that you know.
Speaker 2:I'm like, oh my God, I would ever miss if I never had another drink. And you're right, I mean every time I've ever, especially on a cruise, because you know, you see everybody and you have the package. So you feel like you need to have the four or five drinks. I don't care if you drink light beer, I don't care if you drink straight up whiskey or straight up whatever. That's empty calories and that's just crap that you're putting in your system. So it's like, literally you, you're, you're walking on a treadmill, literally you go to the gym. You think you're walking. You're at least, but you're not, because unless you're at the gym and on a ship for like four or five hours a day, which nobody does, which is empty, by the way the gym is always empty.
Speaker 3:I'm trying to even think like who on the cruise to the gym so I have so many clients who will tell me, so I'm a virtual trainer and I have so many clients you know I create their programs for them and they go. Well, I'm going on a cruise. They have an awesome gym. So like, keep my programs on the schedule. And I'm like, let's be honest with ourselves. Like, are you really gonna go to the gym? Because we know you're not.
Speaker 2:So like, just enjoy your time, that's okay you, you would be shocked then I always, if I'm in vegas, I have to go to a casino that has at least a decent gym, like caesar's palace, and it's not because, whoo, because I, I've gone to like the, the mid to lower, and it's like um, new york, new York, literally small gym, and they only have like one pin for like that Everybody has to share. Yeah.
Speaker 4:Yeah, dude.
Speaker 2:It's like but yeah, no, because I've made that mindset that wherever I go before I would have to go run. Then, after I tore my ACL, I stopped running. So I have to hit every gym, and before now I'm a member of, like the Glow Crunch, just because they're located everywhere, but before that, yeah, I was like an idiot. I go, oh, I'm going to go visit this CrossFit box. It's only going to cost me $75, $25 a day for a drop in, and it's like for what I already know how to do all those lifts. What's the programming at this one? So let me pay $75 for three days, oh, and let me buy a shirt so I can promote that guy's business too.
Speaker 4:But you get to go slam a ball around and call it functional.
Speaker 2:Of course, of course. And then what's crazy is, like everybody that's, that's like the going rate is 24, drop in, yeah, like f45, which I, I the f, the big f, and functional f45, which, okay, I'm not, I'm not gonna shit on them, it there's, there's a gem for everybody. Put shit on them a little bit, okay, but right, I mean, could you? I'm gonna fucking pay 25 to do that.
Speaker 3:Yeah, 45 minutes, oh, I know are you insane, and that's my biggest thing. Like I'm not against crossfit I think you know it has a place but most of the programming I see is trash, where it's like they're literally slamming a ball and jumping on boxes for like 30 minutes, I'm like no no, mine, the one that I was a member of 10 years.
Speaker 2:It was always lift and lift heavy until you, you got I let's see, I have, uh, I had to have a double hernia. Oh my gosh, torn labrum, which I did, I was and I kept on. I'm like I have to finish the wad. And then it was like, oh, I might need just one rest day. And then it was just like I didn't go get it checked out until cause I'm like, okay, my, my, my strict press, or you know, jerk, it wasn't until I could only lift like 65. I'm like, okay, yeah, maybe I need to go go get it that's like that, guys.
Speaker 4:Bro, I feel like we right dude, it's the last minute to go to the hospital unless you guys have, you know, a cold, then it's like oh no it's a different story. Yeah, those memes are different story.
Speaker 2:Yeah, those memes are correct though. Yeah, yeah, that's, and it's funny because a cold to me is like even worse than the Rona. I had that a couple times. I was one of the first ones, so I thought I was going to die, because you know all the media said that, right, you're just going to write it. My, I'm gonna have to write a letter to my kids and, and you know, it's like day two, day three, I'm like okay.
Speaker 4:So what am I gonna go down the history books as the one who spread it, you know the super spreader, man the super spreader.
Speaker 2:You see, we're all on zoom because we're waiting for, we're waiting to flatten the curve finally, you know, um, it's, it's funny, zoom because we're waiting for, we're waiting to flatten the curve Finally, you know, um, it's.
Speaker 4:it's funny, matt, cause we were talking about, like you know, your uh uh experience out, like you know, um, at college and Sam.
Speaker 2:So we went to Arizona state, you know, which is a pretty big pretty school, yeah, so you're naming like two schools where it's really drinking and then you major in drinking and partying and then minor in actually like learning something.
Speaker 2:There you go, you can get across the finish line yes, and there's no four-year. Usually it's five, five and a half and it's like no, there's no master's degree involved. Friday's optional yes, yeah, degree involved friday's optional yes, yeah, that that was in the running too was arizona state, because I bought from walden books because you know we didn't have that information super highway, it was like a list of party schools. I I picked lsu because it was no priorities, you know. So that's that's how I got there.
Speaker 2:But I've got to say you guys, I love everything about what you guys believe in. You guys don't believe in F45 or horrible gyms. You guys are spreading the word with your podcasts and you know you can easily when you don't like something, you don't like the way society is teaching your kids, so you did something about that. You homeschooled them instead. You know what happens is a lot of people oh, I, I want this, I want that, I don't want. Well then, why don't you just homeschool kids? I mean, yeah, I, I took my uh. Well, my ex-wife and I were work entrepreneurs at the time, so we didn't have that option. But we didn't like the public school because you know they were starting with the transgender bathrooms and just teaching them all sorts of wacky stuff. So we put them into, you know, catholic school all the way through, you know.
Speaker 2:But it wasn't like I'm like, well, I want this. Well, yeah, if I want prayer in school, that's why, you know, and that's what you guys were doing. You weren't waiting and bitching Because that's what people love to do. They're like, well, we want change. Well, if you want change, you do it yourself. You know right. Could you imagine if all you did was like rail against it? Oh, I can't believe what the school system's doing with my kids. But they went from kindergarten all the way to 12th grade and they graduated. Whose fault is that? Is it the system or is it you guys? That had choices? You guys chose hey, let's take them out, let's do it ourselves.
Speaker 4:Yeah, I think it's a combo because you know I won't lie. You know right now for us, like we're both remote, so we're at home all day and we have flexible schedules. And I realize, because you know there are probably people listening and be like, oh, I work all day, I have to have an hour commute. You know I got this office, I got an hour commute home. You know, cost of living is increased so now you know, a single income household is not as within reach as it used to be, right, unless you're, you know, making good money whoever you know the breadwinner is, and good money whoever you know the breadwinner is.
Speaker 4:But at the same time I think even just like society, we've kind of lost touch. I think about like we outsource so much, we outsource everything in our life and that includes our kids. And you know you look back at all of history and it was so normal, right For the family unit to be a family unit, for the parents to raise the kids, to teach them to, you know, have them work around the house. And then obviously industrial revolution came around. You know schools very much followed that and that's been the system.
Speaker 4:So I think I mean it's hard Cause, I think it's like a deep rooted factor of cultural society. Then you know I'm I mean it's hard because I think it's like a deep-rooted factor of cultural society than you know I'm I'm a capitalism supporter, right, but same time, you know, I think it has worked some things in the country to where, yes, like you know it's, it's shaped some ideals around building wealth, making money, and I think that has driven a lot of people to want to go to the workforce early and stay there, you know, and even just with kids, right, look at the United States birth rates gone down, um and I think for a lot of women too, like a lot of women, I feel like it's starting to go.
Speaker 3:You know, switch the other way. But a lot of women, you know when, when I was in college and I told people how excited I was to become a mom, they were like, well, why are you even going to college? Then, you know, we were always pushed this story of like we need to be that boss babe, like you need to be going and making the money. There's nothing wrong with that. But for me, you know, my kids are always going to be the top priority and I am thankful, like Charles said, that I can work from home and still teach them, but they will always be that top priority and I feel like so much of society loses track of that and the kids take the backseat and the kids no longer become the priority. And it used to be. The kids are our future and I just don't think people see that anymore.
Speaker 2:What people love to do, too, is point the finger, and this is like everybody. It's not Democrat, it's not Republican. The school system has been the same since 1880s.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 3:Literally so backdated.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yes, the technology has has changed, but it's still the same thing and really what we, with schools, teaching them really is to be a worker, exactly you have to be in at 8 am, you have to clock out, you have to do your busy work, you, and that's all that school is and it hasn't changed. I mean we spoke about there is no financial literacy. It's because we're still teaching kids how to square dance.
Speaker 1:We're teaching kids how to play that recorder.
Speaker 2:I don't know why the recorder? Because nobody likes that sound. It's just pure torture. A parent has to hear that instrument, plus a kid can never play it.
Speaker 4:Great yeah hot crust buns yes, and here's.
Speaker 2:This is what I did for for my senior year project. You know the important stuff family, family living or whatever. The class yeah, you and your partner had to take care of an egg. Well, congratulations, thank you. You didn't teach me how to do open up a, how to balance my checking, or how to open up a checking account. You didn't even teach me how to friggin buy a cd back then at five percent or whatever, instead of the point zero, whatever percent. You didn't teach me anything, but you're like, oh my gosh, information superhighway. It's got to be completely different these days.
Speaker 4:Same curriculum yeah and you know it's tough too, because I know there's great teachers out there who know pour their heart and soul into it. And you know, I think even just going back to like all right, it's like we point the finger. Right, we want our kids to have the best education, but we pay our teachers shit. So what kind of talent does that attract, right?
Speaker 2:Well, who wants to? If you want to be educated and live a life of poverty, you would go to seminary school. You wouldn't go go get an edu. I mean, if people always say, well, you know it, it's like a catch 22 because you hear the, the teacher, all your teacher friends, the pay sucks. The pay sucked 40 years ago. 30 years ago, it wasn't, it wasn't like academia was like saying, hey guys, when you graduate, I heard the starting pay for a teacher is going to be 75 000. No, it's been, it's been crap. So you, you take that job knowing that you're doing it because you want to live in service, you want to help kids. You want to live in service, you want to help kids, you want to educate kids, or you love that cushy. Three months off, you get Kwanzaa off. You get the Muslim holiday off, you get every holiday off, juneteenth, you name it. You, you get that off. Those are the benefits.
Speaker 4:Yeah, you know, you know that going in you do and it's it's tough because, like you know, we know teachers. I know I have some friends who are teachers and they get jaded right, they go oh, who doesn't? And but same time, like it's, it's tough because again, going back to our society, like it's, it becomes the point where it's babysitting right, who's gonna babysit the kids and who's gonna give them a three hours right?
Speaker 4:just past my kid so again we're saying it's, it's outsourcing and again, like I don't know the full answer to it, you know, and I think even in this country, like you know, we used to like revere moms and families and having kids and there's such a beautiful thing, right, of course.
Speaker 3:And now it's like all right, or even like less than 1, like 0.75 kids per married couple, because people just aren't having as many kids.
Speaker 2:But also what stopped the overall family. You know the one breadwinner, the housewife, madison Avenue. Because, holy smokes man, we need that Lexus, we need to live beyond our means. We, we, we will finally be because I, I chased it. I I chased happiness, thinking, not that I know, it's crazy, I didn't think I could create myself.
Speaker 2:But, oh my gosh, if I bought this, the ultimate stupid move, because and coming from somebody, that's fine, that would teach people how to invest I really need this hundred thousand dollar car. It's zero percent, it's only two thousand dollars a month car payment. Now, you know this. The sound person would be like I would tell them are you fucking stupid? I don't care what mutual fund, I don't care what index fund, unless you're buying enron stock or planet hollywood stock invest. But that's that's where we came, because back then, you know, there wasn't all these commercials where the husband's a hero because he comes home with the new lexus for christmas which I don't know who's gonna make. Oh my god, honey, thank you. We're barely paying the bills, but now we, you added a 700 payment, thank you.
Speaker 4:It's got a belt on it, though, you know yes, this was the best christmas present ever. You are a rock star yeah, I, you know it's um I think a lot of it too is just social media, of course.
Speaker 2:None of us have credit cards right. All three of us can't go to a high-end hotel anywhere in this country on this world on a credit card Not at all. We can't rent a Lambo and say hashtag winning, nothing like that. We can't go on Airbnb or any of those sites and just rent out a mansion and do reels or anything like that. No, we have to show people you know we can't buy a fake Rolex or fake Gucci or Prada, nothing like that. And yeah, people see that and they're like oh yeah, I want that lifestyle.
Speaker 3:And I think a lot of people you know, I think in general society just lacks a foundation like for their life and they're looking for that purpose and they're looking for that meaning. And I think that you know for us, like, the foundation of our life is our faith and you know that is our meaning and our purpose. And I feel like so many people lack that and so they're searching for it and they think that buying it and the likes and the clicks and the thumbs up and the hearts and you know the photos they think that's going to give them purpose and value.
Speaker 2:I mean it's not and they're going to forever be chasing that seen that and, trust me, I'm someone that actually had well had and has a relationship with christ. But it was always like something like maybe there's more, like I. I felt like heaven would like every time I set a goal, whether it's fine, spiritual, financial, everything. Because I was spiritual, financial, everything, because I was always goal-driven. If I did this, then I would be worthy. And you know, john 3.16 says we're all worthy. Quit the bullshit, hands down, but that the gates, the sky, would open and, like a ray of sunshine, would hit me and go and I would hear the voice of anybody Moses, jesus, st Peter, whomever going. Omar, we are so proud of you. You are happiness, you are success. I just and cause I had all the answers, but I lack common sense Cause you know I would tell people, you know any rational people would be like yeah, you know it comes from within. You wake up and it's a choice, but it was always like that. But, yeah, no people, there's, there's zero found.
Speaker 2:You have to have a strong foundation to be disciplined. For starters, waking up at 4am Nobody likes that, that I don't care. There's no habit, you know you. You program yourself, but you know how 20 days or whatever creates a habit. That's, that's wrong. I I've taken, I've read 10 pages like the 75 day challenge, whatever, 75 day hard, all those habits. The 76 day gone, gone, yeah, no, no, cold shower, no, this, no, that.
Speaker 2:When people say 21 days, it's a solid poster, it's a solid dream, because there's times until you pass that point, like you guys, it's automatic. You say why do I work out going out of town? Because there was a time I wouldn't even work out in town. But it's just something that we can all be obsessive, but at least create good habits with that obsession. Because what happens is people choose the bad habits. They choose the porn habits. They choose the porn. They choose the overspending. They choose the 70 pizza, which I love everybody. You know the latest craze buy the 70 pizza on a friday might have like six wings, a couple of cokes. So not you. Not only are you setting yourself back big time, but your wallet and your body, but everybody it, because it's it's you know that that meme and that saying choose your heart. Yeah, people, people always choose the wrong heart and it's because it looks easy well, I too.
Speaker 4:There's this weird phenomena that we're in now and this even goes back to the influencer piece a little bit and you know being so influenced by social media, both good and bad, because you know you have one end of the spectrum. It's like these biohackers out there and they have their 10-hour you know morning routine. They wake up and they, you know, do this on and take this many supplements and all these things, and then people try to emulate that they can bring information over.
Speaker 2:Like Dave Asprey, oh my God, and I've read all his books and like shit. Yeah, there's like 40 hours in a day. Yeah, responsibility.
Speaker 3:Yeah, of course, and I keep a day. Yeah, you have no responsibilities.
Speaker 2:Yeah, of course, and I keep on. I'm like, okay, I can't wait to hear the news, and it's just, he repackages it over and over. But it's not. If you and I, all of us, we're disciplined, we can't follow that. Or, like you know, the Joe Dispenza, you know, just start meditating for 30 seconds and before you you can do it for two, three hours. I'm like, yeah, you're world famous, exactly, but I get that. Yeah, when you, when you say the super, the biohackers and and do this and do that and have a plunge, you know like, yeah, I, I just have a plunge, a plunge bath right right out, right, you know, the neighbors come too, and I've got a cryo machine in my spare bedroom.
Speaker 4:yeah, it's this weird thing where it's like people they see that and like I'll add all this to my routine, it's gonna make to make me fulfilled. Or you know, I'm going to go on. I'm going to go on this trip where I saw this influencer. I'm going to go eat this restaurant thing. And they're not living for themselves, you're.
Speaker 4:It's a really weird thing. It's like porn in a sense. You're getting off from watching someone else do an act that you should be doing, right, right, and people are watching all these other people live this life. Then they go try to live it or they live through it and it's like, well, did you really want to go to that restaurant or do you just want to go there because your influencer went there? Or do you really want to do this? Or are you just doing that because you know simon sineinek told you or something Right? Does that really fit into your lifestyle? I'm not saying, don't take good info, but I feel like now people, even with podcasts and stuff, people listen to podcasts all the time but it's like, how much do you actually take from that? And then not just conceptualize it every single time you listen to it Like, oh cool, cool, good idea, good idea, but do you go apply it, or are you just listening to it for an hour a day?
Speaker 2:Oh, no, man, you guys are going to laugh, but most people, even those that they're seminar junk, they're just addicted to dopamine. They're no different than the guy eating a $70 pizza, but they feel like they can put themselves on the pedestal because they're like well, I've gone to all, I've gone to all of them, it's, it's a dopamine rush. You know, you feel like you can walk on fire, you can do the 10x sign, but when you get home, man, that goes all out the window. You're back to reality. You're not in an, an arena full of like 10 000 people that want to get, you know, live a healthy lifestyle or live their best life. So do they ever implement anything? If and you'll hear these people all the time oh man, I've read like 50 personal development and business development books. Yeah, but then why? Why are you such an f-up? Right?
Speaker 2:oh, because you don't implement it's like implement one thing and do it on a consistent basis and you'll be successful in any aspect of your life. Imagine this if somebody who's sad prays and prays and just pray. It takes time out, morning, at night. You know, live in gratitude, like you know. Hey, thank you, jesus for giving me one more day so I can post memes and and do nonsense. Yeah, you, you would. You would literally just feel better about yourself instead of just like triggered and angry and being overweight and taking meds because you're feeling like crap, you look like crap, it is what it is and it's sad because you know people are chasing an illusion.
Speaker 4:It really is.
Speaker 3:And they're chasing that quick fix and they want, you know, maybe if I do this one thing and I'm able to get to this meditation and these cold plunging routines, like that's going to be the quick fix, then I'm going to get the life I want, then I'm going to have the happiness I want, then I'm going to get the life I want, then I'm going to have the happiness I want. And they aren't willing to, like you said, just do that one small thing consistently, and what a difference it would make.
Speaker 2:Well, imagine you're a couch potato, you just felt inspired because it's your birthday or it's January 1st, and you pick up a biohacker book or on Audible and you listen to the 50-step thing on how to change your life. And I know all these guys. Oh, I used to be a big, fat piece of crap. I weighed 280 pounds and blah, blah, blah. But look at me now and I'm a rock star and I'm super wealthy because I keep on selling all you people the same books and same programs and the same supplements over and over again. But if you follow this, you will be happy Overall. That's what they're selling Happiness and acceptance, Because people will accept me. Finally, If I follow this, if I look better and they don't realize it's a, it's an inside job.
Speaker 4:And again like, and he goes back to like. It's that sense of fulfillment and you have a higher power than yourself. Like you know, as Heidi mentioned, faith is big for us and at that day, like, the only really acceptance I look for is from you know, my father and um, you know the ones that mean the most to me, my family, who really wouldn't care if I had.
Speaker 2:You know half the stuff that I do, right, um, and so you're telling me that your happiness and salt worth isn't based on how many downloads Calvin kettlebells and how many subscribers.
Speaker 3:Well, there's that dopamine, you know I think that is a perfect example, because so we our podcast, we've been doing it for three years um audio and we recently brought it to youtube and it was a huge like chasing those likes chasing the subscribers and realizing how quickly we got pulled into that and then we did not like it.
Speaker 2:Like how oh, I had to stop my youtube because I was like how can? I have all these downloads on audio. Is it because of my looks? Is it because of this? It's because no, man, because on youtube people, people aren't chasing how to be better, they're watching videos that don't serve them.
Speaker 3:Yeah, they have a 20-second time span.
Speaker 4:Yeah, it's a frustration because we're like you know we built our audio up and you know it was building and even after doing YouTube, our audio was still growing at a faster rate. And it's like, well, shit like, will we not deal with YouTube?
Speaker 2:Oh, yes, yes, I, I gave that up. I'm like because people like is this going to be on youtube? Like no, why not? Because do you do you honestly want the seven watches or the eight people? Nobody cares, they'll listen to it. People, people that want to follow stuff like this, they'll listen to it. Yeah, yeah, I agree, we're just talking. It's not like you know if, maybe, if I had slot machines and we're like you know, we're in las vegas and the neon lights so we could get dopamine fixes.
Speaker 2:But there's nothing, you know, and that's it's. It's a tough battle and that's why I I threw it out. And then, for the longest time, you know consistency. You you'll hit numbers in audio and overall you, all three of us, are in the same purpose just to be in service, just to live the world. Have, make the world a little better by changing one life, two lives, three lives, four lives. You guys weren't doing this thing. Oh, I, you know I want to be with Ed Milet and they. You know we're not in competition to see if Andy, for soul, is going to hang out with us.
Speaker 4:You know that's, that's funny. You mentioned that to you, man, because I look back to like when we started podcasts and we were like, hey, if we could just get one person to stop drinking every day and then come home and try kava and then to go hit the gym the next day like bro, like, is that not fulfillment, is that not a win? That's, that's exactly. It's like even you know. Now it's like we're trying to grow podcasts. Yes, we're trying to do more, but it's because we've seen we've had people met listeners in person who are like yo, like you, inspire me to start working out. Or I stopped touching alcohol for the past six months, and it's like that's pretty fucking cool.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's what it's all about.
Speaker 2:Yeah fucking cool, like, yeah, that's what it's all about. Yeah, exactly because I I remember, um, somebody, it was like an interview before doing my ted talk. Would I feel fulfilled in my life if, yes, the podcast, it grew numbers over the years, did a few more self-published books, maybe did another TED talk, but that was it. Would I? Would? I think I was successful and I was like, hell, yeah, because my main mission is just to change people and you know it was. I said I'm only going to if one person changes, if I made a positive impact and if, years from now, I never said I wanted to be an influencer, I'm socially awkward anyways, overall I am. You know, a person I didn't know came up to me and said, oh, I read your book and I was like I went full, like who the hell is this? Don't talk to me like that. So, yeah, people get people think people don't understand. When you choose to be in service, like all of us, it's not about any number or metric, you're doing it for the right reasons.
Speaker 2:Jesus. Jesus didn't say, well, hey, I'm going to bring Lazarus back If I get a thousand people here to see me do it. He wasn't saying, well, maybe I do, I'll do this miracle If it does this, or I mean, he changed the world with only third. You know only 12 people, really, really 13. Cause I count him and a couple of other people. That's it. You know everybody wants. You know the 5,000, 10,000, but what's that equal to? Are they going to be at your funeral? Are they going to be there when you need help? No, it's the people that you, you care about and yeah. So, overall, yeah, I love what you guys, your whole mission statement. We have the same ones. You know same values. Really love your family. Love God, be a great person, don't be an a-hole.
Speaker 4:That's all you can do in life, man. It's pretty simple, right.
Speaker 2:I mean, could you if, if, if, Jesus came and oh, give me the meaning of life? It's pretty simple, you know, yeah, overall, you wouldn't be like well, well, you know, how many followers do you have, how many downloads, how many people buy from you, how many people quote you? Who cares man?
Speaker 2:he's a big, he will say let me see that meme, the game exactly I can talk to you guys forever and ever, but the parameters and all the numbers say everybody tunes out after this. So kava and kettlebells. I know how to find you guys. How do we find you? How do we listen to the podcast and, more important, how do we hire you? Because there's plenty of people out there that look like shit, need help from the inside. I mean outside's great, but if you're on 50 meds and you're on dialysis and all that crap.
Speaker 3:yeah, so you can find us on Instagram at kava, underscore kettlebells, and we're very active in messaging. So if you have any questions on you know, personal training, the nutrition, the health, you can message us there and then you can follow our podcast. We're on whatever platform you listen through Spotify, apple Podcasts just Kava and Kettlebells, and then, like we said, we also recently brought it to YouTube. If that's your thing, kava and Kettlebells on there and then brought it to YouTube. If that's your thing, um, kava and kettlebells on there, and then, yeah, that's that's how you can reach out to us.
Speaker 2:Awesome. Thank you for the time, thank you for the conversation, thank you for being you guys, and you guys aren't the sheep, you guys are the lions, and that's what the world needs. The world's broken man Needs a lot of healing from the inside, from the outside. So keep doing what you guys are doing and thank you for the time. You guys are rock stars.
Speaker 3:Well, thank you so much. We appreciate it.
Speaker 1:Appreciate it, elmer. What if it did work? Right now you can make the choice To never listen to that negative voice no more. The hardest prison to escape is our own mind. I was trapped inside that prison all for a long time. To make it happen, you gotta take action. Just imagine what if it did work.