241: This Contortionist Found the Link Between How You Breathe and Why You're Stuck - Kemi Blake

Kemi Blake started training contortion as an adult with a body that wasn't built for it — no childhood conditioning, no natural flexibility, just a fierce refusal to quit and an unusual willingness to pay close attention to what her body was doing in the moments before she lost consciousness. What she found wasn't a performance hack. It was a map of the nervous system, the body's hidden pressure architecture, and the emotional terrain that most of us spend our lives navigating blind.

BIG IDEA

The nervous system doesn't distinguish between emotional pain and physical pain — and that single fact changes everything about how you heal.

Kemi Blake contact info
Website: https://bodikemistri.com

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Theme Song : Rage Against
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(c) 2016 Mercury Retro Recordings

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Transcript

0:56

Folks, it's day off my operating table with Dr. Philip Ovadia. Today something a little different is happening. Normally the guests come through Phil or other people in Phil's circle. Every now and then I find somebody who I think, oh my gosh, we have gotta have her on the show. And Kemi Blake, our guest today is one of those I was introduced to Kemi through a mutual friend of hers and mine. He said, you gotta talk to this girl. And he was right. Kemi Blake, welcome to the show. Thank you so much for having me. I'm so glad to be here. Now, Phil, we focus on the show, primarily on, on things surrounding metabolic health. And what I find interesting about what Kimmy has is it definitely affects metabolism, but probably in a different way than we normally talk about and hear about on the podcast. Why don't you start with your story about your appendicitis. I obviously, I've spent some time talking with her, so I, tell us about the appendicitis and how the things just kinda rippled out from there. Okay. So I was living in Costa Rica and I was actually only there for four days. And then I started having stomach pains. And so everyone recommended that I go to the hospital. And when I got there they were like, okay, yeah, we're gonna operate you, you have appendicitis. And I was like, I do not have appendicitis. Now at this point, I had already been learning about nutrition and how to heal myself like naturally. But at this point I was in a different country. So I, it was I wasn't familiar with what they had available, the natural herbs and all this other stuff. So I did go to the doctor and the doctors was like, okay, you're gonna op, we're gonna operate. And I was like, okay, I need a second opinion. This is a big good decision to make right now. I've only been in country four days and they were like, you don't have time for a second opinion 'cause we're operating in 15 minutes because if not, you can die. And I was like, wait a minute, we gotta call somebody. So I called my parents and they of course were afraid that their daughter was gonna die in another country. So he was like, just let them operate. It's no big deal. And I was like, okay. And I just felt very strongly that I did not have appendicitis. And I felt that if I had a natural drink, like a natural juice, like if I juiced greens and garlic and all of these things that I normally do, that I would be fine. And, but I didn't have access to that. And so I let them operate. And I looked this doctor in the eyes after the surgery and I asked him, I was like, did I have appendicitis? Because they said, oh, we can't truly be sure until we actually operate, but we're gonna do this just in case. And he just looked like he wasn't being honest because he paused and I asked him three times and he said, yes. So long story short, I go back to the home where I'm staying and I get sick again. And so I had to come back to the hospital and the, he wasn't there. It was a different doctor. And he was like, oh yeah you had blah, blah, blah, blah. I was like, wait a minute. So I didn't have a appendicitis. And he was like, no, you had a stomach infection. And I think it was just because I was in a new country, new, you know, amoeba's, germs, whatever. And and at that point I was livid. I was so angry, and it was really hard for me to find peace and compassion and all the things that I can access now, because at that point I just felt super violated. Not because he, it wasn't like he I felt okay, he's trying to save my life and he's doing this ex this operation. It was that he lied to me. So I felt betrayed and then I felt like there was, it can't be undone. Yeah. And and it was a lot of pain that went with that. You know, I had stitches and all the things. So after that I just decided if I am going to be a healthy person, I have to play a more active role in my wellness and in taking care of myself. And I can't rely solely on doctors, and I understand that they're not necessarily, obviously malicious. They're not coming from miti, malicious place. However they are coming from a particular paradigm and it doesn't necessarily always lend itself to healing naturally. Okay. That's a great intro, I think. And yeah we certainly tell people the same thing, and I, as a doctor tell people like, you know, you shouldn't be relying on your doctor to make you healthy or to keep you healthy. You know, your doctor hopefully is a ally to help you understand how to stay healthy. But yeah, that, that's a you know, and what I'll say is we hear stories like this all the time, might not be specific to appendicitis, but you know, oftentimes it takes something like that to wake people up, to realize the power they have within themselves. Yeah, it definitely woke me up for sure. For sure. Okay, so from that point you got here, so tell us where here is and then we'll probably fill in the in-between. Okay. So here is I don't know where the start I, right now I've developed a practice in methodology. I call it body chemistry, and I. Help people regulate their nervous system via breath and pressure regulation and posture. So I got there because of my contortion journey. So This is the bit I got all wound up and excited about. Yeah there quite a bit has happened since the appendicitis and all the things. But the one thing that I was excited about my whole journey was movement and dance. And so I had gone the investment banking route for a little bit and I was like, okay, this is not quite for me. And yeah, and I just, I asked the, you know, that you read the book, the Who Moved My Cheese and all those things, and it's like, what the million dollar questions, what would you do if you could never fail? And for me it was like I, I would dance. So I started pursuing that. Granted, there's a big, there's big gaps. I went to the Peace Corps, figure it out. After the banking, investment banking, I was like, okay, this is not it. I need to be someplace where I can actually think.'cause New York City is like fast place, you know? So I was like, okay, I gotta go to a village. I've lived in other countries, but I've never been in a small village where I can just relax and really get clear about who I am and what I want. So I lived in a village in Honduras for two years and I was always dancing and always moving. And one of the projects that I worked on was with the, 'cause I lived in a Garifuna village, that's the group of people of the ethnic group and they have this traditional dance. And so I always found myself in that. And then I created this project to help them with a sustainable, like a tourism group where they could actually get paid to perform.'cause before they weren't getting paid, they were just performing. Yeah, I'm like, where do, I don't wanna give you all the details, but then I got wind that a friend of mine back in Brooklyn was murdered. And I was like, wait a minute. So she had done all the things that I had done. Mind you, I didn't tell you like where I'm from. I'm originally from Harlem and I got scholarships to go to Georgetown. I went to a Quaker school before that, I went to Georgetown and I was like, yay, I made it. And then I was like, wait a minute. So she did all the same things. She was in the same programs that I was in and I was like, so you could just be gone Just like that. That four year plan, that five year plan didn't matter at that point. I was like, so I said to myself, if I could be gone tomorrow, if this is my last day here, is this the life that I wanna live? And it was just the answer was no. So I was like, okay, what do I wanna do? So then I left Honduras and I came back to the States and I was like, I'm gonna pursue dance. And so I enrolled in the Martha Graham school. And then after that, at the Alvin Ailey School, and again I'm old at this point, ancient. I'm like 25, 26. Ancient, no, in the world of dance because there was no program for adults. Usually people begin as younger, you know, and their teens are earlier than that. And then they continue a professional track. So at my age, it was like there was no professional track. So I created my own way and. On that journey, I realized I was not that flexible and I just thought that you had to be born a certain way to be flexible. Either some people had it or some people didn't. And I was like I guess I just didn't have it. And then I discovered rhythmic gymnastics. I think it was the Olympics or something. And I had seen it, it was the first time at I was 20 something. I had never seen this before. And I was like, wait a minute. They have a whole sport. This is, they're not all freaks in nature. Like you can clearly train this. So when I realized you can train it I sought out a trainer and and that was a really difficult and slow road just because I, at that point I was a mom. I had my daughter was I think about two when I decided, okay, I'm really gonna go for this. And yeah, I eventually. I eventually got into, oh, went to circus school in Queens in Long Island City. You ever met anybody who's been to circus school? Phil, I think this is the first for us. Yeah. So I went to circus school and here I am just trying to do all the things and oh, so one of the moves that I do is, you know, that is trying to sit on my head. So my feet come here, so I'm a back bending and I bring my whole back body up here so that my butt is here and my head and my feet are here. Now again, I told you I was not the most flexible person, so I'm trying to do all these crazy contortion moves and my adult body and I passed out. That was it. Like I just passed out and then I'm like convulsing and and then I was aware of that moment actually had me question, I don't wanna get too out there, but just what is reality consciousness, all these things, because I. Ultimately was in two places at one time. So I was aware of my physical body. At first when I blacked out, I was just somewhere else. I was just gone. And it was like, it was completely real. It was a whole I was, I had a whole story. I was, you know, I was doing a thing, whatever, I don't remember exactly what it was, but I remember it felt so real. And then I became aware of the people around me because they were concerned and they were fearful, and I could feel their energy the fear, and I was actually embarrassed, but I was also unconscious so I could not communicate to them. That I'm fine, but that was my desire. So I remember coming from wherever I went back to. I just wanna tell them I'm fine guys. Don't make a big fuss. It's not a big deal. I'm fine. But I just, it took me some time to be able to recollect my body and to tell them that. And then when I came out it was like, yeah, I'm fine. I'm fine. It's no big deal. Let's go. Next thing you know. And so I, but I did ask them, they're like, you sure you're okay? I was like, yeah. I was like how long was I out? And for me it felt you know, a long time. And they were like, yeah, just like a couple of seconds. I was like, oh, okay. But again, maybe this is my trauma response or whatever, but I was just like, okay, let's just get back in there. I don't wanna look like a, you know, a weak person. But I didn't, I knew I couldn't keep passing out and I wasn't willing to quit consortium. So I had to figure out how to be present in my body and not pass out. So I started like paying. Like a attention to my body and what was happening in the moments when I would get to that edge, because that was not the last time I passed out. I did pass out afterwards, but I started going to my edge to see, okay, how do I know? What are the indicators that I'm getting to my edge? How do I know? And then the first thing I was like, oh, I stopped breathing. And I was like, huh. I wasn't even aware of my breath. So I realized, okay, I started, I stopped breathing. So I was like, okay, if I can slow my breath down and still be aware.'cause there was also a moment where you haven't seen those, you know, those old tv the black and white TV where it has like the fudge or glitches. So there was moments like that when I knew I was to my edge and I wasn't breathing. Things would glitch a little bit, right? So I was like, oh, okay. I know I'm there. So I would back up a little bit and then I would focus on my breathing. And then I used to open my eyes. I'd be like, okay, open my eyes. Because I realized, oh, I closed my eyes and it was easier for me to just completely let go. Yeah. So I just started paying attention to that. And then over time I started realizing it's not just breathing, right? Yes, you can breathe anyhow, but it's a certain way to breathe. So I learned how to breathe diaphragmatically in these range of motion in these crazy positions. And then I learned, okay, the body has these different pressure gates, right? So we have these different diaphragms. I know maybe medical doctors or not medical doctors, but like the traditional, don't recognize, I guess all the different diaphragms. They just recognize the re respiratory diaphragm. However, I know osteopaths recognize the different diaphragms. And so I started working with that because I started in paying attention to what I was feeling intuitively. I didn't have the medical knowledge at that point or anything like that. I just was like, what am I feeling in my body right now? I'm like, oh, okay. When I breathe in the space between my respiratory diaphragm and my pelvic floor, I can control the internal pressure and I can control it in such a way that it can relieve pressure on my vertebrae, and then I can relax a little bit more and then I can bend more. But then I also noticed that this didn't help me just in bending and contortion. It also helped me just in life, like I was able to be calm and be present and meet difficult situations with a level of calm that I'd never had before, and that was. That was life changing. And then I started helping other people do it. And so that is, so this is, that wasn't the goal. The goal was just to be able to put your butt on your head. Yes, 100%. I didn't care about any of the other stuff. I just wanted to perform and put my butt on my head. That was it. And then here I am like,'cause I, I started noticing, I was like, so there's a person, 'cause I wanna honor them. There's a person who I value very deeply. This person is a performer, has been a performer their whole life, known around the world but struggled emotionally, just struggled and couldn't. Find a way to, to just be present and to be still. It, like with themselves, it was hard for them to meet the emotional stress. So they were emotionally dysregulated. And then physically, I noticed that they would manifest physical problems, like postural problems, all of these things. And I was like, wait a minute. And I started putting two and two together and I was like, oh, so posture matters because your nervous system is you know, your spine is a, your spinal cord is a part of your central nervous system is housed in your your in the. Spine the bones and the vertebrae. And so when those are misaligned and there's pressure or compression, then it affects how your nervous system responds. Your nervous system thinks that you're in danger because you're not balanced. And so you go into that fight or flight space. And then again, your body starts producing certain hormones like cortisol and and adrenaline and all of these things. And this affects ultimately your metabolism, but also how you feel, right? Like your emotional state and your emotional wellbeing. So it was interesting to try to explain this to people because usually they don't connect the dots. They're just like, one has nothing to do with the other. And I believe that the body itself, is advanced technology, number one. And then two, it's how we navigate our way through this world, right? We're physical beings in a physical body, but a lot of us do not pay attention to the state of our physical body. Just even just how we live naturally. When I was in India and when I was in China the toilets are on the floor, you know, like the, there's a hole in the ground. And I even the public toilets. So I was very surprised because I was like, what do the old people do? And I asked them and they were like, they squat. And I was like, really?'cause I couldn't even imagine. My mom could never you know, or any of the people, even people in their thirties here are like, my knees, my hips. And I was like, wow. So culturally things were very just different, right? And it lend itself to a healthier lifestyle. And I, and again, so contortion also taught me the importance of not only posture, but specifically joint centration.'cause then that gets me to I'll explain. I don't know what that is. I'll explain. I'll explain. So I wanted to just sit on my head and I wanted to move very freely as a contortionist. I was forcing it the whole way. Because I didn't know anything else. I was just putting myself in these positions and I was doing it forcefully and it was hurting me. So when I went to China and I was training with Jackie c Chance stunt team, and they trained martial arts for film. And that was a completely different training than my contortion training. So they move faster and they require, you know, that hip flexibility, that hip mobility. And so because I didn't have that, I was like, I was in pain. So when I came I came back to the States. I was like, I have got to get an MRI, I have got to do something because this sensation, I feel, I thought it was normal because I always felt this kind of pain or whatever. I just thought, okay, you work hard, your body gets sore. That's just natural. But I went and I had this MRI and I came, I don't know if I told you all the details'cause I think we wanted to save it, but I came back for to get my results for the MRI and the doctor's looking at the paper and she says to me, she's do you ride horses? And I was like, no, that's a very specific and odd question. I was like, why would you ask me that? And she was like because both of your hip labrums are torn and then also the ligaments, you know, attached to that. So what are you doing? And I was like, oh, I do contortion. She's that'll do it. She's that'll do it. And she was, she wanted me to have a surgery. She wanted me to have I forget the name of the surgery right now, but she explained it as a super simple surgery. It was quick, it was gonna be like a keyhole incision, no big deal, bad bang, bad boom, that's it. And I was like, okay. But you know, I know my track records were doctors, no offense, but I was like, let me go ahead and investigate this. Let me go ahead and do some research. And I had another friend who was in Cirque de Soleil, and he actually had that same surgery. So I asked him, I said, Hey, how was, how long were you out? He was like, nine months. And mind you, he wasn't able to go back. He wasn't able to go back to circa he was out too long. And I was like, nine months. I was like, there's no way. Like I cannot. Risk because all the work that I've been doing, if I don't do it for nine months, like it's just like I never did anything. So I was like, we gotta figure out a natural way to do this. And so what I learned is the reason why my hip labrums were torn is because my head of the femur was not centered in the acetabulum. So it is, it drifted forward. Does that make sense? You know you have hip bones, okay. Yeah. Yeah. Alright, so you have your your hip sockets, the ball socket, right? And the head of the femur, that leg bone it should be centered. But what happens, because again. Here I won't say culturally, but our habits. We sit in chairs. We or we sleep on comfortable surf like mattress, memory, foam all of these things that have our hips misaligned and so the head of the femur get drifts either forward or backward. Mine was drifting forward and so whenever I would do my movements, it would grind and tear the cartilage around. And so I learned, okay, can't do that, but gotta figure out how to get that joint. The head of the femur centered in the joint so that I can move with more ease. So yeah, so that's I started doing research and then I started incorporating everything that I learned, the breath, the the positioning of the ball and socket joints because it's not just the hips, it's also the shoulders. And also coordinating the two of those, the, what my shoulders were doing, I had to make sure that I was in line with my hips. And when I did that, I was able to breathe into this canister so that the space between, under the ribs and the pelvic floor. And that's when I started realizing that I can actually control my internal pressure and. Yeah. So here I am. Okay. But what's the, What's the, oh, go ahead, Phil. Yeah, no, this is amazing. And you know, I, I this is probably the longest I've gone into one of our podcasts without talking and just listening because this is all fascinating stuff. You know, so this connection between we, we talk about movement as being one of the four, you know, pillars of health along with what we eat and how we sleep, and, you know, how you manage your stress. But I think flexibility as part of movement is definitely underappreciated. And you know, how it relates to your health. Maybe let's go back a step and just, you know, for those of us that aren't trying to be contortionist why should, like the average person out there be concerned about their flexibility? So I will say this I don't necessarily promote that. Okay. You have to be flexible. I would focus more on mobility than flexibility because I think what happens when you say flexibility, people are thinking, oh, I should be able to do the splits, or I should be able to do you know, a movement like that and for performance reasons. I don't, or or, you know, like a party trick or just to say you're flexible. And I don't think that's valuable for the average person. I think what is valuable is to understand that the body, is a, again, it's technology. It's like a machine. And so it, it is meant to move a certain way, and when it moves optimally, you are well emotionally and physically. So I think people should understand that you don't have to go to extreme ranges of motion, but you should develop a connection with your body so that you can develop what I call, I guess, flexibility of your nervous system, being able to go between parasympathetic and sympathetic states of being. And so the way to do that is to have some awareness of your body, is to be connected to how does this work, how, and also being able to manage. For example, things like pain and not run away from them. You know, a lot of people, as soon as they feel pain, they're gonna take a pill, an Advil or something, a Tylenol or whatever, instead of leaning into curiosity, why am I feeling this sensation? You know, maybe I need water. Maybe that's why my head hurts, you know, or maybe I just need to get up and move so that my lymphatic system is not stagnant, you know? So does that answer the question? Yeah, no, I think that's a great point that you make. You know, we clearly the autonomic nervous system, the sympathetic to parasympathetic is a big role in a lot of, you know, the different diseases that we talk about. And a lot of the, you know, health problems that we have you know, many people have pointed out disease is disease right? When we're not at ease that's when we tend to get sick. And you know, I don't think people appreciate enough that connection, right? And things like being aware of how you're breathing is a very powerful force that we can use. If you know, if you have the right, if you understand what it's trying to tell you. Yeah, I think it's again, I actually one day there's so many things I wanna do, but I kind of see myself kind of in the anthropology role as well. Like I wanna explore how, like how societies affect you know, our choices and then also our physiology, you know, so for example, like I mentioned the things when I was in India, we were barefoot most of the time. Granted even when you're in a city and you're going into the stores, you leave your shoes outside and you walk into the store barefoot. And I was like, oh, this is great. You know, or or sitting down on the floor. I'm sitting on the floor now sleeping on the floor. If you go Korea Chi Japan, people are sleeping on the floor. There are so many just ways or traditions that. Have gotten lost in big cities that do affect people's physical bodies, like I mentioned the whole not being able to squat, you know, so the hip, not having mobility, there also being disconnected, so not having your physi physical body in the shape that I guess it's meant to move. You can't even breathe ideally. So for example, the average person takes what, 22,000 breaths a day. So if you are taking 22,000 breaths, that's a day, and you're breathing into, I guess, the wrong space, right? Your body is now shaping to that habit. So if you are not breathing from the diaphragm, the respiratory diaphragm in the pelvic floor in that space. But your lungs need to expand to get some air so your chest expands upward, your shoulders take over your neck, muscles take over. And so now you start getting tense in these areas because these areas are auxiliary, I guess, muscles trying to help you so that you can get breath. And so now your whole physical body is changing and you're like, why is my back hurting? Why is my neck hurt? We are not taking into consideration like a small thing that we could do to make it change breath as something that we do habitually every day, all day. So if you can just change that, then you can change your physical body. I wanted to dig into that. So we take, we, we practice something 22,000 times a day. Wherever we do it, it's likely to become habit. You are saying, the body compensates for a failure to breathe the way it's best designed to breathe. And in that process of compensating, it can cascade into all kinds of other aches, pains, and probably maladies. So stories, I mean, have you got examples of for yourself or for other folks that you've helped here that can Yeah. Okay. Can illustrate this? Yeah. So one, I helped a woman give birth two weeks ago. And she, so I was looking at her posture, but mind you, I came to her like she was, she, we came to each other at the last hour, right? So it wasn't like I was able to work with her over time. I actually just saw this woman, she was. Eight and a half months pregnant. And she was breathing super heavy and I was just like, Hey, can I help you with that? It just noticed her breathing. And she was like, help me. Yes, please. You know, she's at the end of the pregnancy. And I was like, okay. So I had a workshop and it was called Anatomy of Safety, and I invited her to the workshop. So she came and and then I mentioned, I was like, Hey when it comes time for you to deliver this baby, I can help you if you want. And she was like, yes, please. And her intention was to have the baby alone have a home birth. And but she had never had children and she. Was by herself. And so when she had, she was having contractions, they were five minutes apart, she reached out to me and I was like, okay I'm headed over there. I went over there. It was just, it was, that was a crazy story. I'll bet. Yeah. Yeah. It's crazy already. So I go over there, I'm like, girl, what's your plan? She was like, just to get the baby out. I was like, okay, that's it. So I'm going into work. I was like, listen, I'm not a licensed a midwife or doula, but I have this technique and I can help you with this sensation that you're feeling. Because when I gave birth at home with no doctor. I did have a midwife. She came. And help me, but I was going for what they called an orgasmic birth. I didn't even know that was possible before. And, but when I learned that it was, I was like, oh, I don't have to have pain. Like I can have this baby naturally because my body was meant to move this way. Great. Sign me up. Tell me what I gotta do. So I so yeah, so I was, I applied all of this and everything that I know to this woman's situation. And so I was like, listen, when you have this the contractions, because she was having pain and she was just tired, wanted it to be over, she was like, oh my God, please. So I was like, okay, line align your body posture. I actually would have her go up against the wall Every time she went she was feeling a contraction coming on. She would go stand against the wall just because that was the quickest way for her to understand where to be and have her press her head in the wall because she had forward head posture. So this obviously compromises the breath. So I had her put her head against the wall, stand straight, and then breathe into that canister between the respiratory diaphragm and the pelvic floor diaphragm. And every time she did that, she was able to manage the internal pressure so that when she had a contraction, she could literally, one, control it and breathe into it and need it so that she didn't experience pain. And so she would feel the sensation and then maybe 20 seconds and it would go away. And we kept doing that. We did that for 13 hours. And but also because every breath you take your muscles move, your body's, your body moves. So when you're contracting, because you need to contract, expand, contract, expand so that the body can open and make way for the baby to come through. When you can a affect that change by also expanding your muscles so that you can, with your breath, you can make it happen, I guess, more if you will. Does that make sense? Like you can kind of push the baby out. You understand what I'm saying? With the breath expanding. And so when you do that with awareness, you don't have to give it again because she was regulating her nervous system. And so because she's regulating her nervous system, she doesn't have to lean into fear because now the body is oh, okay, I'm stacked. I'm made for this. I got this. I don't have to like clench.'cause that's what happens. That's why you feel pain. A lot of times women, again, bodies are not prepared for this. People are sitting in chairs. The hips are not where they need to be. So now when the bones have to expand for the baby to come through, they, the pain rocks them and then they tighten because they go into that sympathetic state and then they clench. And this literally is like your body fighting itself. The body's trying to open and you're scared so you're tightening it. So we, I worked with her with that and yeah, she was able to have her baby naturally. She didn't have to have any epidural or any of those things. Yeah, so that, that's one example. That seems pretty stupid. So what are yeah, what are some of like the signs that people should be looking for in themselves right as they're going through just, you know, their day that would indicate right, that they're having these issues. The misalignment that you talked about the, you know, not breathing correctly. What are some things that people can maybe start to recognize within themselves that are issues related to this love that you ask? I have five key points. I call them anchors. Your tongue placement. Where is your tongue? In your mouth? Okay. Because usually we are not even thinking about our tongue, so it's usually off to one side. You can tell this by facial asymmetry. Because again, the pressure is going there so that the bones form, you know, to the way the muscles are. So tongue placement, making sure that the tongue is on the roof of the mouth, on the palate, and evenly spread out on both right and left side. That's the first one. Then your shoulder placement, usually because we're sitting forward rounded for, we're on our phones, we're like this. When you're like this, now your chest is compressed. You cannot fully expand and breathe the way that your body was meant to. So I suggest now paying attention, bringing your awareness to your shoulders. The next thing is your ribcage, your rib cage needs to expand, really always. The 360 expansion. So that your lungs can expand when you inhale. But what happens is those intercostal muscles get really super tight and sticky because you're in this compressed position. So I would pay attention to that because what happens is because people have tight shoulders forward when they go to straighten or put their shoulders where they go, their chest flares like this, which is not ideal, right? Because now again, now you can't fully breathe ideally between that respiratory diaphragm and that pelvic floor. So the next thing after the rib cage is your pelvis placement. Where is your pelvis? Are you rotated anteriorly? Does it go, does it tip forward or does it tip posteriorly backwards? Then the last point that I focus on is your feet. Wear your feet placed. And how are your feet placed? Again, because we are wearing shoes that have heels, even if you're not wearing you know, high heels, like women, you're still wearing these sneakers. These all, even these sneakers, these clouds, huts or whatever it is that they, everybody, those have a heel now that brings your center of gravity more forward. Now all your weight is breath forward and the toes are narrow in these shoes. So now your toes are compressed. So now you have no spatial awareness. Your nervousness your, you know, brain is like, where am I in space? Because it relies on the receptors in the feet to know where you are in space. So you can't stand up fully straight and be okay if your toes are compressed. So I pay attention to that as well. And not just that tripod that people talk about on the feet, that big toe people lose that big toe. The it goes towards the other four toes and now you have, you, you're less stable. You know, you don't have that, that, that. Stability because you don't have the spread. So those are the five things that I would suggest people pay attention to. Yeah. Awesome stuff. And it's interesting, you know, I have heard more you know, practitioners talking about you know, our feet and you know, there's the big movement, right? The barefoot or the, you know, the shoes that can mimic being barefoot, the flat and spread out toes and all of that. And so I think this is something that people are becoming aware of. But it's still kind of strange, right? When you see an our society, right? If you see someone walking around barefoot in public, it's right. Kind of weird. Except if you're at the beach or the pool and you know, you always have those you're like the funny looking shoes, right? Instead of, I was gonna say, I have a funny story. So literally I was just flying two days ago. I flew back to Vegas and you know how you go through the TSA, right? But I have pre-checks so I don't have to take off my shoes. But I had I had those five finger shoes and and I'm actually prototyping them'cause I wanna make my own, but, so I have these shoes and I'm wearing them. And the lady was like, you're pre-check, right? Because we're all in the same light. She's you know, you don't have to take off your shoes. I was like, I didn't. And she looked at my face, she was like, oh my God, those are shoes. She's that's so crazy. But yeah, I explained to her, I was like, yeah, you know, I wear these 'cause yeah. For my alignment. And so she's oh, okay. Yeah. It's so funny. Awesome. When we first talked you hinted, we didn't really get into it, but you hinted about I don't know a better phrase for it than emotional healing. That one of the unexpected benefits from what you started doing for yourself was emotional healing. 100%. 100%. Because. What happens is, so we're relational beings, right? Obviously we don't live by ourselves, so we are meant to be in community. But what we do, we relate to others based off of how we relate to ourselves. And I get it because when we are younger and we're dependent on our caretakers, most of us have learned that their acceptance of us is like our survival is dependent on their acceptance of us, how they receive us, how their emotional wellbeing. Yeah. And so a lot of us has gotten disconnected and dissociated from our own selves and what we really, truly want or desire or need to satisfy the needs of our caretakers. We grow up with that and we disconnect in many ways. What I realized when I started connecting to my physical body, I started paying attention to. Act, the felt sense. What was I feeling in any given moment? And so I noticed that when I was in that fight or flight state, right? I had different sensations in the body. I would have tightness. My breath would be shorter. I would be yeah, I might feel like a, what is this? Like kind of like a heat or cold. It depends. Like when I'm tight or like you get around somebody, you can't stand them and you're like like I had these visceral responses that I was paying attention to. So when I learned how to regulate my nervous system with my breath and all of those things, I started noticing, oh, okay. My emotions also can change and shift according to my physiology because the physiology I was feeling. You know, tight tense all of those things when I was upset or in a emotional state that I didn't wanna be in. So when I was able to regulate that and intentionally bring myself back to a calm state, I also noticed that emotionally I was well. And it also allowed me to distinguish when I was around other people, how I related to people, not just you know, friends, but work. I mean everything family. How did I feel when I was interacting with this person? And I let that feeling and that awareness. But when you say feel you're mean. How did my body Yes. That we're not talking about the kind of ephemeral. Feeling we're talking about yes. Literally what's going on in my body right now? Yes. Okay. Yes. And usually the, I mean, there is a correlation, right? Sure. So usually you'll notice that you feel a certain way in your physical body when you feel a certain way emotionally. So when I became aware of that connection, it allowed me to use that information to guide how I interacted with people. And it allowed me also to just yeah, it allowed me to be more emotionally intelligent. And then I started communicating more authentically, and that was more effective, and it allowed me to have healthier relationships. What does that mean? I mean, meaning, give me an, give me concrete example. Okay. For example, there was oh, okay. This is like a hard one, but a true one. My father, right? This is because, you know, some people, you know, they have relationships with difficult relationships sometimes with their parents. So my father is a person who feels like he is a loving and supportive parent, and I understand why he would feel that way, but that's not how I experienced him always. And so when I noticed that I noticed when I was in conversation with him that I was going to my old pattern, which was trying to just appease him or saying whatever, which would let the maintain the status quo, I guess, of the relationship. So he didn't feel offended. I just, you know, I would just say whatever, but that wasn't me being authentic or honest. And so then I started saying, okay I appreciate where you're coming from, right? However I, because I think I, I think you're supporting me in this way, but this is how I could receive support, right? This would be more supportive to me. So if you could meet me there, great. But if not, I also understand, but I'm also not. Allowing him to just have his own fantasy of what is. Does that make sense? So you were having this interaction with your father fairly, I guess, a common interaction. And you began the process of noting your own physical sensations. And that led to you, I'm trying to work through what happened That led to you realizing, oh, if I'll get back to my practice, for lack of a better word I can neutralize or reverse these negative emotions by addressing the sensations that my body is giving me. And then from that point, from that place of being more emotionally calm because you had, I love how you call it, regulate your nervous system. Is that it? You were able to communicate to your dad what you needed or what did I get that right? Yes, you did. And then also I know I'm really going step by step here, but Yeah. But this is so different from what we normally do and what we normally talk about, and frankly, it's interesting, but not entirely clear to me. So I'm working through it all. Got you. Now, I think, if I recall correctly, you also talked about that this also helped you for lack of a better word, heal. Old emotional wounds. Yes. So again, so this is super personal to me, but obviously here we are. My, I never wanted marriage when I was growing up. Like I never, because I saw my parents' relationship and I was like, I don't want that. If that's marriage I'm good. So I've operated with this sense of, you know, I don't know if you call it type A personality, but I'm doing everything by myself. I'm shooting for the moon. Like I'm just, you know, that's my person. I, I'm gonna get it. I'm have to do it by myself. And so when I had my daughter I was doing that too for a long time until I realized that she needed something more. She needed something else. She needed community and family and I can't do it all by myself. And so I was like, okay, I want partnership. So I desired partnership. And then I noticed that when I would try to partner, I would attract the same type of situation or person. And I didn't understand why I was doing that. So that's actually that conversation that I was having with my dad, I was trying to explain to him I have to relate to you differently because I learned how to relate to men by relating to you. And so now that I understand my needs more clearly and that I'm being more authentic and honest with everyone, including myself, I have to interact with you differently because I have to train myself to interact with other people, these potential, you know, husband yeah, differently. And so that allowed me to really let go of some of the anger or resentment that I had from my father. And also, again, being able to just really regulate my emotions. I was able to just have compassion. You know, just have compassion and understand that the world isn't out to get me everyone. I mean, maybe there are some people who are not interested in, you know, me existing. However I get to choose how I meet the world, how I ch like how I show up. And so I chose to show up honestly. And whoever's able to meet me here and whoever wants to be in my world in a healthy way, great. And whoever isn't is also no hard feelings. And I can do that even though this person is close to me, even though he's my biological father, he's my blood. I can still release and let go and not feel, you know, any sort of anger or resentment. Is it your perception that. By learning. I'm gonna, I'm gonna press the pause button on that question and back up. There's a model of emotional health that's, that is essential. Essentially, as I understand it, it's that we get these wounds just like physical wounds. We develop these scars just like physical scars that are emotional. They're in our past. We drag them around with us. And the only way to deal with emotional scars is kind of by unwinding it, un reversing all the way back. And and what I'm hearing from you reminds me of I read a book by Bessel VanDerKolk, called The Body, keeps the Score, and he's talking about that these emotional wounds are actually, in many ways, they're stored. In our, literally in our cells. Yes. And it sounds like, if I'm understanding you correctly now, I'm gonna get to the actual question. It sounds like your model of emotional or psychological health is get the body, he heal the notice what's happening in the body when you have these memories or whatever it is, get that cleared up through your thing. And those what the, that older model of psychological health would call scars. They cease having any power or something like that. Am I. 100%. Is that a good, is that a good summary? Yeah, because, and that's why I was saying the body, I was using the word somatic, but somatic just means body, right? Of the body. Yeah. And so I feel that we can address everything somatically because we are experiencing the world in this body. And so if you just are, observe the body and do your best to maintain its physical form, you know, in a healthy way, you'll be able to work through all of those other things. That is 'cause the nervous system doesn't re the nervous system responds to a emotional pain and physical pain the same way. Yeah. Yes. That's I think one of the struggles right these days is you know, getting back to that sympathetic nervous system, right? And that fight or flight response. And you know, that's basically a primitive response that was supposed to react to, you know, true, like life-threatening things. You know, some animal is trying to kill you or whatever it is. And one of the problems we have today is that same response gets triggered by. You know, things that shouldn't be triggering it. You know, the way we interact with social media or whatever it might be, and this is a lot of what is contributing to the health issues that we have, is now you're sort of chronically activating the system. I wanted to kinda loop back to something you talked about earlier because, you know, I'm a heart surgeon. I'm in the chest all the time working. You know, and you talked about that we have the diaphragm that everyone thinks of the respiratory diaphragm, I think you called it. And the lungs are above it, you know, on top of it. And we think when we breathe, it is all happening in the chest. You mentioned a couple of times about breathing between that diaphragm and the pelvic floor, which is very similar to a diaphragm structurally. Let's go into that just a little bit deeper. What does that mean? How do people do it? Why is that important? Okay, so it is important for pressure management, like the internal ment overall the whole body. So when you breathe into the into that space, the respiratory diaphragm and the pelvic floor, what happens is that whole area expands in a 360 degree. If there was like a big inflatable ball, right? So it's not just forward and back, it's, the sides also have to expand. And so the shoulders stay down and and this expands. And when you expand on the inhalation, that creates this this pressure that also extends to the lower extremities. So like you can then release the tension off of these the add I don't wanna get too specific, but you know, like the adductor muscles, the muscles around. The pelvis, but that lead into the legs. And your second heart is your, is in your is it soleus your calf muscles to get the pumps, the blood from the lower body back up. So when you are not breathing diaphragmatically into that space and you're clenching your pelvic floor diaphragm, you stop that pressure from going down right into the lower extremities. And now everything kind of gets stuck up here. So now your pressure is dysregulated in internally, and then that, again, that sets the nervous system off to respond in the way that it does, but it also leads to other like actual physical ailments like, you know, like varicose veins and all these types of things. And you know, that blah, blah blah. But just the stagnation of the, of the lower extremities because it's not moving because you're not, you're holding your pelvic floor and then also leads to other stuff like incontinence and, you know, poor sexual function and all these other things. Did that answer the question? Awesome. Oh yeah. No, that was great. You know, and just thinking back right to your sort of the origin story right when you passed out.'cause you're trying to get your butt up over your head, right? And that happens because of those, that pressure change, right? Wasn't allowing you to get enough blood up to your brain ultimately, and Right. That's why you passed out. And it's just fascinating to realize that whole connection. It's so interesting though, because even I mean, I feel like, I don't wanna say a weirdo, right? But people think oh, you're definitely a weirdo Kimmy. That's, it's so funny 'cause you know, my daughter has to put up with me and all her friends being like, who's that? But I say that because I, again, I started, I just. For Pure ego. I just wanted to perform. That's all I cared about. And then and even all the contortionists and thank God 'cause again, when I do things, I'm like, I wanna be with the best of them. So now I moved to Vegas to be with the Cirque de sole coaches and the, and these performers. And I'm looking at the novel level of what I had saw when I was in New York. And but even they don't all understand the details of these things, but the reason that they don't is because they've been doing this forever. So like they've, they started when they were 3, 4, 5 years old. And so it's kind of just like second nature to move a certain way. And I don't think they've ever had to take a body that was stiff and then make it uns stiff. Yeah. Make it flexible in that way, in that extreme range. And so sometimes it's hard for them to communicate what needs to happen in order for that, for me to do that. But I still use, I value their coaching. It's kind of like how I felt about doctors, right? It's like I can't rely 100% on the doctor for my wellbeing, and I can't rely on the coach to tell me exactly everything I need to do for my body to do a certain thing. So I use the guidance of my coaches, but I also. Was paying attention very much to my body. What was I feeling? Because when they say, just breathe, honey, just breathe. I'm like you stretching my, you know, like my nervous system is you're telling me to breathe, but I'm still breathing like this. You see what I'm saying? So I'm still triggered. So I had to learn how to breathe and still let them basically pull me apart. You had to learn as an adult. Very consciously, what they probably learned is children and has become so ingrained that it's fully unconscious and therefore it's what they do naturally. Yeah. Yeah. That makes sense. Yeah. Oh, wow. I'm just fascinated. I am. Yeah. This seems like one of the, one of the most, you know, so much about what we're doing. On with this podcast and with your work at Ovadia, heart Health is about helping people re recover and maintain their health. And this feels like something so deeply fundamental. Like anybody could I'm assuming anybody could start this wherever they are. Absolutely. And begin to see positive physiological benefits that would flow through the, your entire body, your entire experience of life. Yes. Okay. Yeah. So let's tell people how they learn more and you know, how maybe you work with people and where they can learn more about all of this. Yes. So first I also wanna say, because I realize I didn't really explain what my practice is or how, like in terms of. What that looks like. That's true. You did so right. So what it would look like if you came to me and you wanted to, you know, experience more nervous system regulation or emotional regulation, I would put you through a, it's a 60 minute class of it, it would look kind of like a yoga class, right? It's a movement class, but the movement is not done. It's not like just copy my warrior pose. It's not that. It is very internal. It's a very internal process. And I focus on, again, those five anchors and breathing from there. Now, this in of itself is gonna be a lot of work for people because people don't think about how they breathe every day. Sure. So to get, so what you'll notice is that if you're breathing how I'm asking you to breathe, you are gonna be feeling muscles that normally don't work in that way. So there'll be, you know, so it's gonna feel like a workout, but it's just, it would be like a very basic, stretching class, but with awareness of breath. So we go through different poses, and again, they're not to push or to be the most flexible or anything like that, they're just poses that allow you to develop that mind body connection and breathe in that space. Therefore, also like training your nervous system, right? So I, it basically, it's like training your nervous system physically. It's like a physical workout for your nervous system. So that's what that looks like. And each session is 60 minutes and I work privately with one-on-one. But I and in person and online. And I also can do groups and people can reach me at my website, body chemistry.com, which is B-O-D-I-K-E-M-I-S-T-R i.com. And I'm also on Instagram, but you know. And TikTok. So body chemistry is not spelled the way you think it's spelled folks. Sure. No. Wises, they're all I No, there no Ys. That's right. Yes. It's spelled like my name.'cause my name is Kemi. KEMI. So I thought, there we go. I was being cute. Cheeky. Yeah. Alright, we'll make sure that the contact information for Kimmy appears in the show notes. But again, that's body chemistry. I instead of Ys and Ks instead of chs. I think other than that, it's Yeah. Other than all those differences, it's exactly Alright. Phil, I appreciate you taking a chance with me to have Kim on. I thought. When I first talked to her, she was fascinating, deeply educated, self-educated widely traveled, widely studied, and had something that if nothing else would be fun to hear. But I also felt like what she's doing can really make a difference. Yeah, I think this will definitely resonate with a lot of people in our audience who are on their healing journeys. And this is just another component of that. Thank you. I actually like LA later on 'cause I really wanna get my work featured in medical journals. Because I don't know that people are exploring this enough because as I experienced in my body, I then go do research and I realized certain studies just haven't been studied. They just haven't been studied. For example, tongue posture. I mean people have studied tongue posture, but not necessarily in adults that much. And. And how it shapes your physiology. So I'm very curious about doing more of this work and helping more people in that way. So awesome. There's more to come. Yes. Yeah. Very good. Our guest has been Kebby Blake. You can find her work@bodychemistry.com. I already explained how to spell it. The links will be in the show notes. This has been Stay off my operating table with Dr. Philip Ovadia. Thanks for joining us. If you liked this and you haven't subscribed, what are you waiting for? Go ahead and subscribe. It'll be okay. We'll talk to y'all next time.