“The shame response is an unavoidable, emotional reflex, universally experienced and intensified with the use of digital communication and social media.”
In other words, Shawn discovered we have an autonomic shame response that is involuntarily activated when we have human interaction and communication via non-human devices.
Our brain doesn’t get it and bugs out big time!
This is a subconscious process and occurs 25x’s faster than our conscious thinking brain! Before we even notice, our brain sounds the alarm, “pull back! Social danger!”
This is where we get stuck! Nervous system says pull back, but needs us to move toward real time, face to face, social engagement to repair the shame response.
We don’t understand what the problem is or where the enemy is located, and this subconsciously drives us to to spend on social media searching for the danger by comparing and competing to no avail. We then shame, blame and stigmatize our response.
This is not a conscious process and it’s not your fault. It’s what your body will do when confronted with communication on metal.
In today's episode Dr Shawn discusses the difference between guilt & shame, the importance of separating our behaviors & circumstances from our identity, the difference between toxic shame and healthy shame, the difference between shaming and describing, and the role digital communication has on our autonomic shame responses.
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Dr Shawn Horn is a licensed psychologist, author and speaker. In addition to her private practice in Spokane, WA, she serves as faculty at the University of Washington's Medical School (Spokane's Psychiatric Residency Program), is columnist for TOI magazine, hosts Inspired Living Podcast, is a media consultant, founder of Instagram's The Psychology Directory, and host of YouTube's Digital Practice.
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Disclaimer: This is not a replacement for therapy and is not clinical, medical, or mental health treatment or advice.
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