After Thoughts
After Thoughts
Transitioning Careers, Travel Tips, and Tackling Midlife Challenges
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(This description is AI-generated hahaha) Ever felt a nagging sense of dread going to work? That was me, stuck in a toxic job and feeling like every day was an uphill battle. It took a lot of courage, but I finally decided to give it all up and found myself back in a familiar industry – alcohol distribution. Boy, what a ride it's been! This episode talks about my exciting journey of transitioning, finding balance, and how I learned to do what I love while still putting food on the table.
Planning a trip to Miami for a bro-weekend? Or Montreal for work? We've got you covered! We laugh, we cringe, and we share some tips as we talk about our upcoming adventures. We also discuss a hot gig that almost melted me, and how I discovered the TeeMoo app that's been a game-changer. On a more serious note, we delve into our GoFundMe campaign to record an EP and the possibility of finding sponsors for the podcast.
Finally, we get a little personal. We open up about the challenges of creativity and songwriting, and how it feels to go through a midlife crisis. It's not all doom and gloom though! We also talk about the importance of taking a break, recharging, and reconnecting with loved ones. We can't wait for you to join us in this intimate and enlightening conversation.
After Hours Catch-Up
Speaker 1After Flowers , after Flowers . After Flowers , after hours . Hello and welcome to after hours , hello .
Speaker 2We still do this thing .
Speaker 1It's been a couple months . Yeah , yeah , a lot , a lot has happened . A lot has been going down .
Speaker 2A lot has happened , yeah .
Speaker 1And you and I haven't even really talked .
Speaker 2No , not really , not other than like sharing gifts and articles Pretty much , yeah . Yeah . Now we've both been kind of covered up with things so I don't know anything that's going on in your life . This would be like a true catch up . Yeah , actually , talk about it and you have no idea what's happened in my life . Well then let's start with you . Red , yellow , green . Let's get into it . I am green green .
Speaker 1Oh , by the way , whoever's watching , drop a comment , let us know where you're watching from and we'd like to say hello . Hello , so you're green , I'm green ?
Speaker 2Yeah , tell me why . Well , let's see . Last time that we got together on here , what was I doing for a living , do you ?
Speaker 1sales for a global shipping platform .
Speaker 2OK , so yeah .
Speaker 1Melissa , hey , melissa .
Speaker 2OK , cool . What is WOT ?
Speaker 1Will of Time she says this is Melissa . Name change because a huge she's a huge wheel of time fan .
Speaker 2All right , that's awesome . I don't know what that is , but that's cool .
Transitioning to a New Job
Speaker 2Yeah , so I'm not in that job anymore . That job was making me . That actually may be one of the worst jobs I've ever had , like ever , as we've talked , I've had a lot of jobs and a lot of really bad jobs . A lot of really bad jobs . Yeah , it was . You know there's , even if the job itself was like the best job ever , if the culture was as bad as this culture was , then it still would have been the worst job , right , like it's really hard to overcome really unhealthy culture , company culture and it's kind of what was happening . But then , on top of that , the job also sucked . So I was having a lot of the same problems that I was having at my last company before that , because the market's bad and it turns out , supply chain is not immune to that . In fact , it's actually kind of on the front lines and I didn't know that . I know a lot more about how the world works and is all connected now . So there's that , I guess .
Speaker 2But and actually to throw that , just to throw some icing on that cake , the last company that I worked at , you know , my friend got me the job , whose name is also Cody . Yeah , like he just got laid off with 50% of the entire company , like got rid of half of the entire company what's up to Nancy ? But yeah , I got rid of half half the company . So , like nobody was safe essentially , and they're I don't even know what they're doing like they're flailing . But I just saw a lot of like red flags with the company I was in last , because of very similar things . I started seeing certain red flags , the way they were using certain language , the way they were starting to put an insane amount of pressure on sales to like boost as much profits and get as much you know , try to see things through the sales funnel as much as possible . And so then I started realizing really quickly why I hate sales and why I'm not driven by that particular . I'm just not driven by that like I'm alive , like , so they're like trying to put all this pressure and like you got to be succeed and got to be the best , and I'm like that's not what makes me want to do it , so you're actually making me hate it more .
Speaker 2It doesn't help , though , like I said , there was this huge culture , cultural problem where , like , from the top down , it was just like this intense , like demeaning , derogatory behavior , like we were all like basically just like shit , children that needed to be micromanaged all the time and couldn't deal . Like they made us come into the office and basically what we started realizing was they made us come in the office because they didn't trust us to do the work at home . So I'm like we're adults , like why do you think we don't want to work like this ? Isn't teenagers in a fast food restaurant like ?
Speaker 2And so I don't know , it was just really aggravating . And then I mean like literally in the conference room there was a sign that I'm sure it was meant to be a joke , but it was kind of ironic that it said it said the beatings will stop when the morale improves , oh God . And I just remember looking at me and like I know that I know they think it's a joke and which was to laugh , but that actually is really accurate with how they do things . Maybe it's not supposed to be a joke , I don't know .
Speaker 1But so it was all of truth in the humor .
Speaker 2Exactly yeah , and so , yeah , it was . It was really rough , and so I decided to start looking for something else , and then they just started putting all of us on pips to like over and over and over again performance plans for those . Yeah , yeah sorry for people who may not be in sales . It's performance and blue improvement plan , yeah , yeah , which is basically like their way of saying you're about to be gone and so well , what it ? What it actually is , is you .
Speaker 1You're going to be gone , but we need to cover our ass and say that we tried to help you first . So , yeah , don't sue us .
Speaker 2Yeah , exactly , and in my , and what I was starting to think is that they were going to do it so that they didn't have to give severances . So I was like I got to get out of here and this is the craziest part . This is where we come full circle , and you don't know what I'm currently doing , so this will be a fresh reaction from you as well . This is a full circle moment because , for anybody who's been listening to the podcast , you've known that I've done other things before . You probably were familiar with my last jobs . So I am , I got talked into .
Speaker 1I think I know where this is going .
Speaker 2I got talked into taking my friend's role who's moving , my friend Toby , who's moving to Ireland in a month , and I took his job at a alcohol distributor , which is still sales . But here's the fun part it's really it's the job I originally applied for when I left the wine shop , all right , and so it came full circle and they're all super excited to have me
Transitioning to Better Job, Pursuing Goals
Speaker 2. The difference is , when I did the alcohol distributor job before , that was my first like sales . Each job and the things that I hated about it was I was the only rep in this entire area . I was driving all over the state , basically just like , and I was .
Speaker 2I had this mandate to open like three accounts a week and it was just like this huge push again Not what I'm about and it was wearing me out . Also was like for like 28,000 a year , like . It was like nothing , because they're like you'll make all this commission , but then I wasn't , because no one knew who that distributor was . So there's a lot of like problems in that . You know , and I was working myself to death . This job pays me a base of what I was making at my last job , plus an incentives . It's not commission , it's not a commission focused . So it's really just about because this is a bigger distributor and they have stuff that everybody wants . So basically it's just maintain your accounts and all of the accounts are all on premise , which means for for people in the industry . It means all like bars , restaurants , stuff that where you can actually drink on the premise , premises and so . But the best part is , most of my accounts are within walking distance of my apartment . Dude , that's amazing .
Speaker 2They're all downtown and I just have to maintain relationships right like I don't know . I've been in quotations but like you know , you're just like you're more of an account executive than a Salesman .
Speaker 2Yeah , I'm just building , keeping those relationships , keeping everybody happy , getting everybody what they need . Most of them , most of my accounts like literally text me their orders , like I don't even have to drive that much , like it's and I know everybody , like I already know everybody at all these accounts and so like I'm friends with half of them , so like it'll be a whole different ballgame and like I've already been done this . I started this week , like on Monday , and just the first two days I'm just like , oh my God , this is going to be amazing , it's going to be so much better . And I'm not really like thinking about it as a long term goal either . I'm still . My big focus is trying to fill all of my life with what I love to do and try to find a way to make money doing that . So if I'm having a day job , I wanted to be super creatively focused . Right now . This job is actually allowing me to have more time in my life for the creative things , and so that's really nice . In a long-term way , I still think I might try to work my way into like maybe something marketing related , something more creative .
Speaker 2You know , there was a job that I came across recently that was like it was marketing , but it was like marketing and quotations . It was like the marketing company but they facilitated like grants for people that have , for people that are in like early childhood education . So that was part of like we're . A weird part of the facet of that job was like signing up , signing people up for that , and then the other half was Producing the podcast that the company did for people who are in our early childhood education , so editing and maybe hosting a podcast , and so I was like well , I'm pretty qualified for that job actually . And then other the other half of it I can figure out because I would just be going and talking to people and , you know , giving them money . So that's pretty nice . It's kind of funny that I just realized as I'm talking about this I don't know if you would listen to this , but the guy who currently has the job and he basically told me about it , I think listens to our podcast because he's five . So that's why , also why I was like , he was like I love this job is the best job I've ever had and I'm a five , so and I was like there we go . So anyway , yeah , we'll see that's , but that all that to say like I am a Huge amount of stress .
Speaker 2Like when I quit my last job I mean because it sales I was like do I mean I don't need to work ? I like a notice or anything , do I ? And they were like no , I mean you can piece out if you want . So I literally walked out of the room , grab my backpack and left . Wow , and I felt so much lighter walking out of it , cuz I mean , literally this job was like morning to night walking on eggshells , eggshells , eggshells and just like constantly Like sweating bullets , like what are they gonna look at next ?
Speaker 2What are they gonna like come down on ? And it was always stuff like they would try to improve my job and they would try to make me improve at my job , but they had no answers as to how I should do that . So it was just like the worst management . So it was just it was . It was really bad and so , yeah , I'm really really happy to be out of that .
Speaker 2So I'm super green and I'm like I've been like recording demos all this week and like getting stuff ready for like recording . Plus , I'm also in the process of it's looking like I don't know if anybody was here for the , the campaign launch party , but I also transitioned from Kickstarter to go fund me because Kickstarter took way too much money out of that whole thing , so , like it ended up being too high of a goal and I but I had to do it if I was gonna try to cover a whole album . So I switched to go fund me and I can do tiers . So at this point it looks like I might be able to get enough for a three song EP , and if that's the kind of the level that I'm at right now , then my plan is basically even if it's a five song EP , even if you , anybody here wants to help me Get to , you know , the five thousand other markets essentially a thousand dollars a song . So I'm trying to get to the twenty five hundred three thousand range .
Speaker 2Right now . We just broke two thousand , like right before we started this , though , so that's nice , and so you know , if I can only do a three or five song EP , I'm going to . I think what I've decided to do is transition fully out of gigging and go into trying to play in real venues , on real stages and opening up for real bands and Try to just be in that space and do it more seriously . So I am putting a band together for the first time since my teenage years . Demos are for that winner tryouts .
Speaker 2Inside joke . I'm so sorry everybody , but he did do that one time , um , but uh , yeah . So all that to say like Everything's pretty exciting right now . So I'm pretty green and everything's like I'm doing all the things I love .
Speaker 1So yeah , that's awesome . So basically your new job is walking around downtown hanging out with your friends and drinking .
Speaker 2Yeah , I mean they even give me like a Certain amount that I can expense , as long as I'm eating at the accounts that I eating or drinking at the accounts that I'm at , like I serve dude that I call on . So that's amazing . Yeah , it's pretty great . I have to do a ride along with you .
Speaker 2Yeah , but yeah , so my you know then , my buddy Toby have , like we were roommates forever ago and so like we know each other for very long , all literally 10 years , almost 10 years we know each other . And so I've just been riding around with him like I'm doing all week this week , and so we're just like basically just hanging out Where's he ?
Speaker 1moving to .
Speaker 2Ireland , dublin .
Speaker 1Wow , okay cool .
Speaker 2He has no job , no place to live . He's gonna stay in a hostel until he figures it out .
Speaker 1That sounds like Toby .
Speaker 2Yeah , I wish I had the guts to do that . I don't know , I'm too much of a , I'm a too much self-preservation . You know , like I just I don't know if I could do it better . Like it sounds whimsical and amazing . Like definitely he could . He's basically putting himself in his own indie film , you know , the center of his own indie film in life . But that's what he's always done . He's done it everywhere . He moved .
Speaker 1So that is true , and things tend to magically work out for him too .
Speaker 2Yeah , yeah , it really does . It's crazy , but anyway , yeah , all right . So let's , I've talked enough . What's , uh , what are you ? Red , yellow , green , hmm .
Speaker 1I am yellow .
Speaker 2Okay .
Speaker 1Yeah , I Coming out of red probably .
Speaker 2Yeah , I kind of suspected as much . Let's , let's , but let's talk about why . Why are you yellow and Coming out of ?
Speaker 1red . It's been a rough couple of months . I can't remember if we talked about this on the last one or not , but you know I Amy injured her arm Back in March . I was about to go out of town to Seattle and up staying and I think that that that whole incident was Just a bit of a pattern interrupt . That got me Just looking at everything I was doing and I Don't know .
Speaker 1I kind of just stopped pretty much everything I was doing outside of work and family and Got quiet and and then , and then in April , we had our anniversary or wedding anniversary , and then , like the next weekend , was the the one year anniversary of my mother-in-law passing , so there's a lot of , you know , intense emotions around that . And then the very next weekend , the family friend committed suicide , and so that also was a huge sort of Emotional Hard situation .
Speaker 1Yeah , and and then recently , in the last week , amy injured her back , and to the point like which she was in so much pain that she could barely walk , and she went to the chiropractor and the chiropractor told her she has Well More stuff going on that requires , like further Treatment , and so it's just . It just feels like one thing after the other keeps happening , and yeah , and then , like all of that on top of Work has been very stressful because , like everyone's , like everyone is going into Um sort of self preservation mode as we're all sort of bracing for the impact of yeah the economic tidal wave that's coming and uh it .
Speaker 1You know that that causes extra stress and plus we've got , like , uh , the culmination of A couple of really large initiatives that we've been working on for the past year . Year and a half I'm trying to get it across the finish line and bring it to market and it's just really complicated and , you know , stressful and , yeah it just it has felt very heavy for a while , last few months .
Speaker 1And so I hate to be a downer , but that's just kind of like where I am right now . I've not really wanted to do anything else , I've just felt completely drained and I'm realizing that I really need a vacation . I think that's one thing . Yeah definitely , and we're planning . We're planning to do it in May and then that got moved to August , ugh God . So we'll see , but
Upcoming Travel Plans and Heat Tolerance
Speaker 1I'm doing . I do have some fun travel stuff coming up . So I'm in July , I'm doing a bro weekend in Miami with Brandon .
Speaker 2Oh man , jealous we haven't .
Speaker 1We haven't really gotten to hang out in years and like just one on one . And so we were like , hey , let's pick a weekend and just hang out together . And then we started saying hey , what do you want to do ? That somehow turned into hey , let's go to Miami for a week .
Speaker 2So it's all right .
Speaker 1Taking a long weekend . We got a condo on the beach and we're just going to hang out and drink . I guess I don't know .
Speaker 2Are you doing that new , the Chattanooga to Miami flight , because they have a new flight for like super cheap .
Speaker 1No , I'm no , because the well , I mean , I don't know what new you're talking about . I know that there is one . When I looked at it it's like once a week so I'm flying out of Atlanta , so , yeah , we're actually going to be in like the Fort Lauderdale area , so that'll be fun . And then in August I'm going up to Nashville for a work thing that I'm basically like it's a working session with my team , so I'm bringing on my team and the VP of engineering and our general manager to do some like intense planning stuff for like the upcoming , really like looking at like two to five years in advance and putting together some visuals around that and planning what we want to do with the technology . And then so that'll be fun we rented a massive Airbnb that's basically like two Airbnb smushed together with two rooftop decks , right in the Gulch in downtown Nashville .
Speaker 2Oh , yeah , so that'll be fun .
Speaker 1And then in September I'm going to Montreal for a work thing , and so that's my . That'll be my first time up there . And then in October I'm really excited going to Palm Springs for our company retreat . You're doing all kinds of shit , Right , but I have to like make it to that point .
Speaker 2Yeah , you know that's what I'm like pushing through . I need to get through the summer , which is going to be like grueling , and it's already like hot as hell here , and that's making me miserable I don't know about you , but I just hate the heat . I don't . I don't do well with heat , as I'm sure we've probably talked about yeah .
Speaker 1I'm not a big fan . I'm trying to like , slowly adapt . We got , we got a suite . I'm pretty proud of this deal . So we I've been wanting to buy some outdoor like outdoor patio set for a while , but yeah , as you know , they're ridiculously expensive and I could just can never justify it , especially because I was like we don't have a great place to put it and and like we're renting the house right now and so I just it's always hard to justify buying things for the house but we I wanted to see if I could find something for Memorial Day . I love the heat on the lizard .
Speaker 2I cannot relate to that . I just start sweating . So that's , I mean dry heat , I would probably be fine with , but probably , yeah , it's the it's going outside immediately . I just I sorry I'm totally interrupting your story , I , but just on the on the sweat thing , I played a gig recently that was outside and the stage faced the sun . I was like seven to nine , it won't be bad . The sun doesn't set to like eight , 52 . And so I was facing the sun , did not ? I don't do that kind of stuff .
Speaker 2So like this gig was a good gig though and it was paying well , and it was like 300 people and but I sweated . I was sweating so much , like so much that I my hat completely soaked and was dripping off of the brim . My shirt was completely drenched . I and that was just for setting up . I had to , cause I said it's a big place , I had to set up my sub and speakers and whole deal , and so I got in my car , took my shirt off , literally brought a towel cause I knew it was going to happen and like dried myself off and then just let the air blow on me for like the 20 minutes , got back out , started to play .
Speaker 2By the end of my first set I almost passed out Like I actually legitimately almost passed out . Like people in the like near the front were like are you okay ? And I was like no , I definitely almost passed out . I'm going to take a break . And so I went , got some and I was like I'm going to get some calories in me . So I got a beer and just like tried to push through and got back up and played another hour but it was real bad . But I just once I start sweating , I can't stop . I'm just like that's just how it goes , and so I'm just not made for the heat . And so , yeah , definitely , here we go . We got the other end . Now that's the other side .
Speaker 1Um , Robin , I can , I can . I can't work in an environment where it's hot . I just I can't concentrate I can't do it .
Speaker 2I can't concentrate .
Speaker 1Yeah , when I was in school , like if they didn't have the if , like if they didn't have the AC turned on um properly , and and like I , I couldn't concentrate , like I , just I don't know why I'm the same way , but anyway .
Speaker 2Yeah .
Speaker 1So I was .
Speaker 1I I had decided I was going to try to find a deal and , um , I was going to go to like Lowe's or Home Depot or something and Amy needed to run to Walmart for some stuff and she said they had some powdery of furniture . So I was like , okay , we can check it out . And it was like a set that was better than what I could find anywhere else in terms of what I wanted , because it's like a full L-shaped sofa with a table , but not like a coffee table , but like an eating table , and two little seats that are also like Ottomans , so you can sit like fully around the table , but then also you can put your feet up or you can lay down , and it's perfect . And I was talking to them to see how like there wasn't a price on it and then they didn't have any more in the store and so I talked them into giving me the floor model , for it ended up being like half off , basically , and so I paid like 448 . Oh , wow , this is like really nice . Yeah , that's really good .
Speaker 2Even 800 is good for like a full one .
Speaker 1I know we finally found out the price and we looked it up on the website first and it was like $100 off on the website for the Memorial Day deal , and so it was like 800 . And so normally it's like 900 . And then and I was like , well , that's actually pretty good . I'm like maybe I could get like a 30% discount , and so I'll see what they come back with . They came back with like pretty much half off . I was like , yep , let's do it . And so I had to make three trips to Walmart to like take it in pieces .
Speaker 1Because we didn't have to talk or anything . Yeah , oh , man , that's really funny but totally worth it . So we put up . I have I want to get like some sort of like temporary-ish gazebo type thing or pergola this is in .
Speaker 1It's in the back . So we've got this like concrete pad , I guess a shed or something used to sit on , but it's right next to a tree and so it kind of it had become unlevel enough for it wouldn't work for like a shed , but it works like I don't even notice at all what I have the sofa on it , and so we got we have one of those pop-up tent things that you'd like like a tailgate or take to the beach or something . So I have that sitting over it , so at least keeps the rain off . And I'm going to see if we can get like a , like a Z-Bow or something . Find a good deal on that .
Speaker 1But it's been nice because , like I , can actually go and sit and be comfortable while the kids are playing in the backyard , which was never really possible before . We'd have to take camping chairs out there , but still we're sitting in the sun usually and it's just not that comfortable , which sounds like a very like bougie thing to say . But when you have to like keep track of a bunch of kids in the backyard all the time , it's nice to be able to sit and relax as much as you can while you're doing that . But I've been slowly trying to acclimate myself to the heat , because I know that's coming and we're only just now dipping our toes into it , and I go for walks every day in the middle of the afternoon , so I'm definitely feeling it , but I'm hoping that I can get to the point where I'm at least it's at least tolerable , so that I'm not angry all the time in the summer .
Speaker 2Yeah , man speaking of deals , though I'm going to say something really funny right now . Has anybody drop it in the comments ?
Speaker 1just so you know I'm going to say something funny , funny funny .
Speaker 2you're going to be laughing at me , okay , but yeah , drop this in the comments if you guys know what I'm talking about , because I remember they did a commercial for the
TeeMoo App and New Season Plans
Speaker 2Super Bowl . But there's this app called TeeMoo . You know what this is .
Speaker 1Nope .
Speaker 2Yeah , it's called TeeMoo and I mean it's basically like a bunch of shit from Korea , right , like it's like you know just whatever , like I don't know where it's coming from , but they're like making stuff . They're making all this knockoff stuff cheaper , right , and most of the time those kinds of apps or you know they have a bunch of it's like actual shit , right , like that you're getting .
Speaker 2Oh , that's cheap shit yeah like Wish , like Wishcom kind of stuff . But here's the thing . So , madison , I mentioned it to her and she was like oh yeah , everybody at work is talking about it Because they all get stuff from it all the time and it's actually really good stuff . And I'm like really , and when I started looking at the app and like there's always these reviews on everything that are obviously not paid reviews , because some things their reviews are really bad , but they have like a way of being like . You know , people can review .
Speaker 2Like if it's clothing , they're like was it too big or was it too small ? Like how did it fit ? Like how accurate was it to the size ? Stuff like that . So it's pretty detailed . But I was like I'm going to give it a shot , I'll buy some like really cheap things . And like I needed a . I found like a wrist blood pressure machine and then , like the doctors always want to take my blood pressure . So I was like all right , I'll just buy one of those . I can take it home and see if it works . You know , it was like it was like $10 . And I got some , a couple of pillars . I don't know if you know what those are like you know when you use them on a couch or like clothing to like . Take the little like oh deep pillar .
Speaker 1Yeah .
Speaker 2I got those and I got something else . Oh , I got running shorts . I was like I'll get , I'll try some clothing and see how that fits . Everything came in . It was amazing , like everything was great , all worked perfectly . So then I did a bigger order and we'll see how that stuff , if it works , some things in my background will change Because I found these panels are on there , but they're exactly the same panels but for a third of the price . So , like there's things like that that I'm like I'm going to see if it'll work . I mean , if it's not , I mean because Amazon is cheap as hell . Sometimes in there you've paid more than what it's worth . So I'm going to give it a shot . But yeah , that's that . That's something I thought there sounds crazy .
Speaker 2Super shady .
Speaker 2Yeah , yeah for sure , but I mean , like they have like rain jackets , that there's a rain jacket on there that I really want to try . But like there's stuff on there , like I think that if you're just like careful to look at the stuff , you can find good deals on like random stuff . That's just like . I mean , they have some like brand stuff there , but I think it's like you know , it's kind of like an overstock situation probably , or something , but it gets here super fast . Everything worked exactly the way it said it was and I was like well , hell , all right . And then , like you know , madison said people at work do it all the time and they've never been , they've never been let down . So I'm like , wow , that's so crazy . So , yeah , you guys should try it . This episode brought to you by team .
Speaker 2That's what I was about to say 2.com slash any grand five for 10% off . I don't know why we should really do . We should just do sponsors . Let's just pull the trigger . Let's make money . Yeah , so , anyway , so , but I do love Are you kidding me If I could make money doing what I love ?
Speaker 1I would sponsor this show .
Speaker 2I don't know Somebody might . Speaking of the show , though , we should probably mention that we're actually going to start making it again . We have .
Speaker 1Hey , we've recorded one episode for the season we have . I don't even remember I don't remember either .
Speaker 2I was actually considering earlier . I was like this week I was thinking I should probably just edit it and get it ready and just like have it ready to go . But yeah , so I'm going to , I'm going to try to work out , doing like I've already got some music and stuff for this season . So I am ahead actually , but for the first time in the history of the show . But , yeah , I think that I'm really excited to like we have the entire season planned out . We just got to execute it . And you know my campaign still going . I assume your book is still trying to be finished , right ?
Speaker 1Yeah .
Speaker 2Yeah , yeah , but I'm like we can't , we can't wait any longer . We were trying to put it off so that we could do these other things , but I've , like that's . I texted you . The day was just like we should probably just like , probably , make things .
Speaker 1Yeah . So actually I don't know if we put this on the list or not , but I'm kind of at the point where I was thinking about what we could talk about and I kind of want to just do the politics episode , just get it over with . Yeah , yeah . Well , I figured we didn't , we didn't , we didn't do a good enough job like alienating our audience with the religion episode . So we should yeah , you should do the politics .
Speaker 2Yeah , but you know , that's the thing . I don't think that neither one of us are . I would say fives generally are pretty . I don't know , I'm Maybe generalizing here . Please correct me in the comments , but like I think that fives probably are less concerned with politics and more concerned with the system and or the lack Thereof , and like I don't know , I just don't think you start , I start talking about politics and I just start talking when everything's broken and it's oh yeah down to the ground and start over .
Speaker 1So so we'll have a fun . We'll have a fun conversation .
Speaker 2It's gonna be real nihilistic everybody . Yeah , I think that I think it'd be fun at this point . I was always afraid to do it before , but now I'm like I don't give a shit because I think everybody's bad , so Doesn't matter anymore . So we're basically that we're gonna start start with politics and then we're gonna start talking about how we're all doomed in the world is terrible . I .
Speaker 1I .
Speaker 2There's a few part to use I would like to do . Actually , maybe we can do that for the like the next season do like a follow-up to some of our our most downloaded episodes . There's a few that like I would like . I think I have . We have probably more things to say and I honestly Could bring in listeners to you . That'd be fun . Other guests , but yeah , season four we uh . Yeah , we're gonna start the next episode on Monday . Yes , fingers crossed as long as nothing else , because catastrophic happens .
Speaker 1Yeah , fingers knock on wood there . Yeah , amy's slowly doing better , so that's good .
Speaker 2Yeah , that is really good .
Speaker 1I Person fully agree .
Speaker 2No , definitely not too far . Definitely not too far . Yeah , no , it'll be , it'll be fun
Discussion on Topics and Personal Challenges
Speaker 2. Yeah , look at , do that topic . Maybe we should pick two . Let's see we knock two out .
Speaker 1I don't know . I most of my mental energy is probably gonna go to towards all of my rants for the politics one . So , if we do , and we'll have to pick , we'll have to look at the list again .
Speaker 2Yeah , and we'll pick one that , like , I can rant about and then I can just switch , do two episodes . But what all that to say ? We promise we're gonna do another season . We have we , there's things , things planned , we'll make it happen . Yeah , okay , amount of things to talk about . I talked about good deals . Talked about the podcast , music stuff , everybody listening . Please go check out my campaign . Help me make music that would actually make my all of my dreams come true , because I have some , in my opinion , good songs that should . That needs to get the professional treatment . And , yeah , I don't know how I really want to take what did Daniel finish his studio ?
Speaker 2He , it's , I , it's operational , he's you know , yeah , it's , it's enough to where he can use it . Oh , yeah , it'll be , it's there . He's recording out of it right now . So , yeah , we'd love to make that happen , but I think at this point we're pretty close to at least a three song EP , so I can at least do that . It's just gonna be weird , though , because I wrote these songs with an album in mind .
Speaker 2So , like , do I pick the most intense songs ? Do I pick ones that are the most commercially accepted a year acceptable , acceptable you know what I mean like , hmm , do I make three songs super religiously intense ? I just don't . I don't think that I want to do that . Like I have , I mean , stay wild .
Speaker 2The first single will be on there , and so , like , that's obvious , it's already done and out in the world . But I have a song that is about a panic attack in the shower . Probably we go on there . And then there's the other song that I want to put on there . That's like more like a ballad II , and it's literally about I Think I've played it here before , at least on something called love this way , and so , yeah , it's all heavy topics , I don't know . I just feel like . But what's really funny is to I don't know if if people realize this about songwriters , like most of the time , that's probably it that way with everything creative , because , say , creativity Is always so delayed , like when you're putting out projects , any kind of project . It's so delayed , but with the process and your brain is always going way faster .
Speaker 2So , like I am two projects ahead of this project already , like I've been writing songs in the last few weeks that are I'm challenging myself to write like really both tempo and vibe , upbeat songs and Like very much changing my vibe and trying to write about like different aspects of life that I haven't ever tried to do before , just to challenge myself . And so , like you know , I just wrote a song about . It's actually it's not I just I say that it's a really upbeat and and happy sounding song , but it's actually a song about Getting to this point . It's like a midlife crisis essentially is what it's about and like how do I , how do I , how did I get this far with nothing to show ? I think it's the first line of the call .
Speaker 2So , yeah , yeah , I know , it definitely is . If I said the lyrics out loud , it definitely sounds super angsty , because the first line is I'm just picturing like like dashboard confessional .
Speaker 1Where's my iPad ?
Speaker 2Let me know . Let me just read out the lyrics . It'll be funny . Yeah , no , it's totally like . It is super . Oh man , what have I done ? It's called good bones , and it's the first verses . I miss being young . I miss having friends .
Speaker 1Miss being young . I miss having friends .
Speaker 2Plenty of time and no responsibilities . I Want to go back knowing what I know now . Life was summers filled with possibility . And now , how did I get this far , with nothing to show for all the people in places I called home ? The journey has led me down some dark and winding roads and , boy , I've grown baby . Now I got good bones .
Speaker 1Dude . So you should , you should write the song you know the way that you intended and then write yeah , change it to the emo version the second verse is on the wrong side of 35 drink , drink too much , and I've been running up tabs .
Speaker 2Somehow I forgot who I'm supposed to be . I'm making up for fucking up my wildest dreams . It works on guys . I swear to God , oh man , but yeah , it's pretty funny , but it's really upbeat . Yeah , that's that . That makes that made me laugh , um along those lines , man I've been .
Speaker 1I've been fighting the , the urge to blow my life up . Oh , recently .
Speaker 2I mean , yeah , I mean to , I get that . I was like that with my and when I was still in that last job , like the last month and a half . I'm just like I Hate . I hate everything , like I just let's just blow everything up and start on them and and it's .
Speaker 1It's like I love my job yeah , but at the same time it almost is . It's more like I . I just I'm tired of doing the same thing . This is always my problem , right I'm . I just get tired of doing the same thing , yeah , and I , and so I know that it's just like a . In the past I would have listened to that and Done something stupid , mm-hmm I . I at least know now that it's a . It's just a feeling , and I can sit with it and let it go . I don't have to act , yeah , and it'll get better , because I've gone through sort of cycles like this since I .
Speaker 2I used to . I used to spiral really bad and then I got on anti-depressants so that helped me particularly , but they were for anxiety , but they yeah , I actually had a speaking of that . I had a really weird experience recently that kind of forced me to Remember what it was like before I had those meds in my life and , yeah , I don't ever want to go back because I yeah , I didn't ever really think this would happen , but , like I just didn't . I didn't think about this possibility that my body , my brain , would actually become resistant to not resistant , but taught , like building a tolerance and so . But when you do that , it's kind of like you're just coming off of the meds and the meds that I'm on you can't just do that like bad side effects happen . And so I started having these Crazy experiences that I read about online . This , the one that was the craziest , is this literally called brains apps that's like that's the term for it . I don't know if you ever heard of it , if anybody here has heard about it , but I have a song that's basically about taking your meds . But yeah , it was the . It was the craziest .
Speaker 2It was like you know , that moment when you're starting to fall asleep and your body like jolt you back awake . Mm-hmm which side note you know why that happens Too fast and your body is afraid you're dying . So it shoots a little like a shot for different theories . Yeah , that's , at least . Yeah , it's one of the theories , and so it was like that feeling , except imagine that . But it's centered right here and it's like somebody touched a taser to my forehead first .
Speaker 2So you feel this like jolt , really strong , like very . It's not painful , but it's . It's upsetting , this jolt and it's just like in your whole brain and it's like in your nerve centers . Because I'd feel it here and I'd feel it in the back of my head and it was literally just this jolt and I could feel it like radiated through my body , but it started in my head and it was like the strongest in my head and it would basically start anytime . I was going to bed , which makes sense . I took the meds in the morning , so it was like at the point where it was the weakest and it would get worse and worse and worse and worse until somehow I could try to fall asleep . And the last night it happened before I decided to Call the doctor , because I say the last night . It happened two nights before . I was like the second night was the worst .
Speaker 1I was had . Doctor say no more Cody jumping on the bed . What , sorry , I'm in parent mode . So when you said I called the doctor , in my head I said and the doctor said no more Cody jumping on the bed .
Speaker 2Oh , it's like a book , a Children's book . Okay , oh , never mind .
Speaker 1We need one of those .
Speaker 2Yeah , but uh , yeah , I am . I was actually having it so intensely that I was like I think I was having seizures , like it was like I would like everything would go black and then I'd have to come back out Of it and it was like taking a wild ride on shrooms , it's kind of what it felt like . Like it would just be like a , it would shock and then I would see a ton of color . So it was . It was really crazy . But I read it like medically they can't figure out anything . It's like dangerous about it . It's just really , really terrifying . And so , yeah , I talked to the doctor and she was like , oh yeah , this does happen on these meds , like we can either try to pull you off Of them or double your dose . It's kind of up to you . But she was like changing meds could be a long journey . So these meds have worked for you and if you double the dose , then it could work for you for another 10 years or six years or whatever . And so I was like I Guess double it .
Speaker 2But in the meantime , with all these like brain shocks and stuff , I was also going manic for like three days and like all over the place was super like spirally , emotional like , really impulsive , like , and I was just like this is how I lived my whole life before I was on those meds and Just like put up with it . No wonder I couldn't keep a girlfriend , I can keep a relationship , I can do like . No wonder I couldn't do any of those things . I couldn't like be in touch with my feelings because I couldn't process them . There's too many things going on . It was wild . So all that same , yeah , my spirals . I Also have been able to handle them and get through them without imploding my life , but I think it's mostly just because I'm on meds .
Speaker 1But so let's hope the supply chain doesn't break down .
Speaker 2Yeah , definitely that would be bad . I don't know what is happening over here in the chat . I guess they're talking about .
Speaker 1It's the 10 little monkeys . Was that ? What's that one ? I don't know what that is . I .
Speaker 2Don't get it . You guys have lost me . Cool . Well , it's all I got . That's the update to yeah all right .
Speaker 1The other date is we'll make sure to get these scheduled To do these more often . I can't remember if we actually talked about this last time , but I think what we're gonna do is for just because we , we , we love having this be part of like , the , like the full community , so we're gonna do these live streams . I think from now on , we're gonna do the live streams for the , the community as a whole , like we did the last couple times , and then the recordings will just be for the premium and subscribers . So , yeah , that way we can include Everyone in the conversation , which has been fun . I always love just seeing the chat fly by and you guys having conversations Separate from what's going on . Yeah , so yeah , and hopefully next time I'll be in a better place .
Speaker 2Well , we will have recorded if we do one next week or we do them every week or every other week .
Speaker 1We , we were doing them every other week . Yeah , I might , I might , just we'll figure out the cadence of it . We'll talk about that .
Speaker 2Okay , that's how we're gonna do it either way , we will have recorded some episodes next time we talk like there's a lot of things that I think will probably , even if nothing changes in your life . It'll be a better mood , because we're always in better mood when we you know yeah , that's a good point , I think that's also things together .
Speaker 1That's also part of it too is I've not been doing anything . Yeah , outside it like the . The best I've felt was A couple of weeks ago . We went yeah , it's like mid-may we went up to visit my parents for the weekend . I took a , I took a Friday off because of my mom's birthday on Saturday and we took the kids . They went up on Thursday night and to Nashville , took the kids to the zoo and then just like hung out and it was almost like a little mini vacation , even though Vacationing as a parent isn't really vacation , it's just parenting in a less convenient location most of the time . But yeah , it was . It was still nice to like just have a change of scenery and kind of break that rut .
The Importance of Regular Hangouts
Speaker 1And I realized today that actually texted Amy , I was like I when we moved our vacation plans like I get why we did that . But one thing I forgot to like Factor into that is how desperately I needed a vacation . I was just like really truly running on empty and and then , just like this weekend and my parents Was was enough of it like noticeable recharge where I started to feel better , and then it's like that sort of tapered off , especially as I've gotten back into work , stress stuff , yeah . So all that to say that means that we need to hang out more and actually Not go like two or three months without seeing each other .
Speaker 2Yeah , yeah , that's a , that's a very good call .
Speaker 1All right . Well , thanks for everybody for hanging out with us , and until next time . We'll see you later . Cheers .