After Thoughts: Attachment Styles (Season Finale)

[A.I. Generated] As the curtain falls on another season, I find myself reflecting on the profound journey we've shared, from exposing the raw edges of mental health to celebrating the quirky victories of our beloved podcast. With our final episode, I invite you to join me as we toast to the episodes that captivated us, the surprises in download spikes, and the laughter that filled our studio. It’s a candid look back at the moments that defined our season, including how a deep dive into attachment styles led to a personal epiphany and my own dance with anxiety—a teaser to an entire episode dedicated to this ubiquitous shadow that we plan to unpack next season.

Setting the tone for the next chapter, we revel in the polished soundscapes that have become a signature of our podcast, thanks to technical triumphs in music and editing. I share a laugh over my weekend battle with workshop materials, which only cemented my resolution for a staycation, much needed after the personal milestones we've crossed. With a future as bright as the electric guitar riffs now gracing our episodes, we close this season with hearts full, heads high, and a teaser of the hair-rising topics awaiting us when we return. Stay tuned, our adventure is just hitting its stride.

Transcript

Season Celebration and Future Plans

Speaker 1 0:00

here we go .

Speaker 2 0:01

All right , we're going oh my god , you're so high right now I am yeah , I don't know how this conversation is gonna go .

Speaker 1 0:10

I thought I would you know , do it up a little bit for the finale hey , we're celebrating . We're celebrating the season it's the end of the season . Can't believe it . It really , you know , kind of hit you fast . I felt like we did not go through as many episodes as we actually did . Maybe it's because I was actually edited them all . Right , I wasn't living week to week . Yeah , this season . I bet that helps . It definitely helps . I'm acting like an adult . Finally , three seasons not doing that and we already have next season planned out .

Speaker 1 0:46

That's true . Acting like an adult .

Speaker 2 0:46

finally Three seasons not doing that , but yeah . And we already have next season planned out . That's true .

Speaker 1 0:49

And .

Speaker 2 0:50

I was actually thinking about season six . I have an idea of what I want to do for that too , so we can get an initial list together .

Speaker 1 0:58

Yeah . So for all those people that may have heard us say that season five was the end in a different show , what was that ? That was After Hours , wasn't it ? I don't remember have heard us say that season five was the end in a different show . What was that was after hours , wasn't it ?

Speaker 2 1:05

I don't remember I think it was .

Speaker 1 1:07

We've had so many conversations yeah , or you did it live , maybe so many names of things yeah , but we said season five was the last , but we have . We have more , so ignore . That , basically , is what I'm saying . Um , yeah , this was a good episode though yeah , I really enjoyed it .

Speaker 2 1:29

It was , uh , you know , I hadn't really as I said in the episode , I hadn't really looked into attachment style much at all before that , um , but you know , definitely felt called out in a few things in that episode .

Speaker 1 1:43

Yeah , yeah , definitely . Yeah , I don't . It's been so long since I edited that one particularly , but I was listening to bits and pieces of it as I was doing the music a few days ago and , yeah , it was definitely like . There was the first part of it where we're just talking about a lot of the we like found camaraderie and all of the uh , the negatives . Um , yeah , I was . That was about the extent of how , how I thought that conversation was going to go and I didn't think past that . So the whole second half of the conversation I remember being newer information to me because it wasn't what I thought the conversation was going to do , I guess . And so , um , yeah , that whole I remember the whole second half of the conversation was was uh , enlightening . I felt like I was in a seminar at that point which is taking a new information and starting to like reanalyze my entire life .

Speaker 2 2:40

Hmm , yeah , I did not like the fact that basically , she was like you've got to go from avoidant through anxious to get to secure . Yeah , and I'm like fuck dude , because I am feeling that hardcore , like the last six to nine months have been me letting myself experience anxiety and I'm realizing how much that is is the story arc in a lot of ways . Yeah , because so much of what I was doing was just trying to avoid the feeling of anxiety and not realizing that that's what that was like Like , that's what the feeling was , that's what I was doing , any of that stuff , yeah . So yeah , we're definitely going to do an anxiety episode next season and I'm gonna have a lot to talk about .

Speaker 1 3:34

Yeah , and it's . I tried , I think I tried to suggest that as an episode at least a season ago and but it wasn't . It wasn't the right time , because now I'll have a lot more to talk about . Because , yeah , I definitely I take , I take two different uh anxiety meds a day , so like I know all about anxiety and now the lack thereof in many ways . But , um , yeah , I , yeah it's , it's an interesting map to kind of like analyze where you are and those around you in a way to try to you know better , connect and manage relationships . I guess in some ways , which I don't know , if we really talked that much about .

Speaker 2 4:13

I can't , I can't remember exactly all of it I'll be honest , I did not listen to this conversation . I listened to it , yeah , today's tuesday .

Speaker 1 4:20

You quality checked it on sunday yeah , you made sure that it all sounded right , so you got the fresh , and every time I think I'm gonna do the same thing , like I'm gonna go listen to it too . Just so I know I didn't , and we even had an extra thing about being an adult , yeah yeah , well , you know I have a lot of things going on . Yeah , that's true , and uh , yeah , it's it's . It's hard for me to keep juggling all the balls .

Speaker 2 4:46

I spent all fucking weekend working on the workshop .

Speaker 1 4:54

Stuff like the stuff in the workshop , oh yeah .

Speaker 2 4:56

Like I mean , people probably don't care about any of this , but I want to vent for a minute . I went through like like four different checkout things because I'm trying to get like we're already paying for certain tools and so I'm just trying to get the thing to work with the tools that we have . And so I was piecing stuff together and then I had some people test it and they're like , oh yeah , this is shit . And then , uh , so I'm like , okay , well , I'm gonna implement something else . And then it's still not right . And so , uh , yeah , that's what I did all weekend and I anticipated being able , like I anticipated needing to work on some of the stuff . And then , um , and then yesterday was , uh , the anniversary of amy's mom passing , and so we , uh , I just went ahead and planned to take yesterday , today and tomorrow off so have like a little staycation and also recover from having to work on this stuff all weekend .

Speaker 1 5:52

It's the first anniversary , second second wow god , so much time it's passed yeah , um .

Speaker 2 6:00

So that when you , when you said you have a lot of stuff going on , I was like yes , I can relate to that very much .

Speaker 2 6:08

So yeah , for sure but I we already have people like signing up and buying tickets and stuff , and I'm really excited about it yeah , that's it's gonna be it's gonna be a really cool event , like I I think we've talked about this to some degree on like what our vision has been for the longest time , for this is not just a podcast , but an actual like body of work and resources for fives , and I think this is the first step into that next phase of actually putting together like material and like courses and workshops and whatever that are specifically designed for fives to help us on that path of of integration .

Speaker 2 6:48

Essentially , yeah , um , and so this is the first , the first real one that we're doing . It's more of like a teaching thing and I'm really excited about it . Yeah , yeah , I'm really excited about it , and Sam's going to be awesome , um , as always , and so I'm looking forward to , I mean , for real . A big part of why I'm putting this together is because I wanted to attend Right , which is a good sign , because then probably other fives- will as well .

Speaker 1 7:17

Yeah , definitely . Yeah , I'm excited about it . I'm excited to see just kind of it's how it goes , I guess , and and and all the technical sides of things . But also , like I think it'll be really fun for it to get anybody anybody , any of our listeners together with us in the same like digital room or whatever , and and just do something together .

Speaker 2 7:39

I think that'd be really fun too Well if you want to , if you want to come you better get your ticket before the super early bird pricing goes away . Wait , when is that Shit ? I should know that it's in like a week .

Speaker 1 7:54

We should do these kinds of ads yes , like it's cool that you did that one for the promo , but this should have been one . We should do one together , like all the big podcasters do yeah that's true . That'd be really fun .

Speaker 2 8:07

Yeah , I didn't feel like coordinating that .

Speaker 1 8:12

We don't really . It's just like I think all they do is have like a bullet point instead of a script . They just have a list of bullet points they know they have to get to and so they just find a way . So there isn't a lot of structure to it . We just need to know what we need to say .

Speaker 2 8:28

But yeah , of structure to it , we just need to know what we need to say . But yeah , well , in that case , the workshop is May 9th at 7 pm . Eastern time and we tickets are on sale now and you go to enneagram5.com , slash connection and we've got a super early bird special going on and I believe that's until like next Wednesday or something . Next Wednesday or Thursday .

Speaker 1 8:50

Okay , I have to put it on my calendar . There you go , the shameless plug .

Speaker 2 8:59

I know .

Speaker 1 9:00

It's fun . It's fun . Yeah , it'll be fun . I mean , anybody who's listening to this podcast should definitely be there . You guys are like in it , more so than the average listener , because nobody else hears this , except for you .

Speaker 2 9:15

But yeah , I feel like we should have had a lot more to say on the season finale of Afterthoughts , but I don't really have a ton to talk about . I feel like this whole season one one has been really cathartic , yeah , especially because it you know , it took us so long to get the season out .

Speaker 1 9:34

Yeah , but I really had to push through those days . We were like is this gonna keep ? Is this gonna happen ? Like are we done like what's going on ?

Speaker 2 9:40

it .

Speaker 2 9:41

I think it was necessary , though , like I had to go through what I went through , so that you know , I could get back into it , but also so we could talk about it , yeah , and then a big part of me processing all this stuff was talking about it , um , and so like just for me it's been , it's been really cathartic too , because this was kind of like the last sort of stage of me processing it , because not only did we talk about it and we recorded it , but then I listened back over it like six months later and I'm like , oh my God , like so much has changed . And then hearing responses from people , like in the community and in comments and stuff of just you know how all the stuff we talked about resonated with them . You know we opened up with politics , yeah , which feels like forever ago .

Speaker 1 10:30

It does feel like forever ago .

Speaker 2 10:32

And we have people sending messages saying thank you so much for doing this episode .

Speaker 1 10:37

I really loved it Really . Yeah , yeah .

Speaker 2 10:40

Because I think it was because we are . So the view that's presented to us is such a polarized perspective , and what I was trying to get to in that episode was like we all have so much more in common than we have that separates us , and so much of the divisive issues are amplified because they want us to be fighting each other instead of fighting them , and that was my the gist of that , and I think that people needed to hear someone who's not like Alex Jones say that .

Speaker 1 11:15

Sure , yeah , yeah , that's fair . Well , I can . Maybe we should go this direction then . Okay , what are ? What do you think are some , some highlights that stick out to you about this season that you , you loved more than the rest ?

Speaker 2 11:33

uh , let's see I I really enjoyed doing the conspiracy theory episode yeah , not a surprise there um , it was just really fun for me to go down some rabbit holes and talk about that stuff and share my whole philosophy of conspiracy theories . That one was good . I'm grabbing my phone so I can actually see . Like I said , it feels like we started this forever ago .

Speaker 1 12:05

Yeah , it's like two different lifetimes . Yeah , it was wild different lifetimes .

Speaker 2 12:08

Yeah , yeah , it was wild , so I actually can't even remember all the episodes we did .

Speaker 1 12:12

You're looking at Notion .

Speaker 2 12:15

I'm going to do the same thing . We need some like hold music here .

Speaker 1 12:21

In fact , if my chair was turned around , I could make that happen .

Speaker 2 12:29

Yeah , so we did politics and then conspiracy theories and then levels of development

Season Highlights and Reflections

Speaker 2 12:31

was really good . I really enjoyed that conversation , um , and I think we talked about , you know , we did the low fives and the high fives , yeah , um , and then you can look at our like downloads per episode , yeah , and then they dropped off a cliff at high fives and then they stayed low the entire rest of the season .

Speaker 1 12:50

Oh no , that sucks , that sucks . We actually turned people away . That's . That's like the worst case scenario . It was so bad . People like what the fuck are these people doing ? And let's just never come back . We get no second chances .

Speaker 2 13:10

Oh man , like I , almost I almost wonder if like apple made a change to podcast or something and like the podcast app , because the the bulk of the downloads that we get in the first day are from apple podcasts yeah because they still automatically download everything , and so I'm wondering if they made some sort of change or something with that .

Speaker 2 13:26

Because it's just , it was weird . It was like I could understand it , going down for a couple episodes and then coming back up , but like it stayed at like half of what it was before . Yeah , which is just crazy . It is kind of weird , but I would , I don't care , I would never not go back and do that episode .

Speaker 1 13:51

A true fan yeah , if you made it past our high episode , I and the thing about it is like most people in the actual community know why we did it . It's because they talked about it all the time . They asked us to , they asked us to , but then that did not go mainstream very well I guess , but it was great .

Speaker 1 14:07

I mean , I guess you know I I suggested before it ever came out , at least a couple times . Are you sure you don't want to just like release this in the community , or so it's 100 your fault that it's out there to the whole world . That's true . Um , you got any others ? Uh , well , why don't you go ? I ?

Speaker 1 14:25

said a couple um well in , my favorite moments are any of the times that you cried . That was like a drinking game oh thanks , um and uh . I think that , other than the high fives , I remember in low fives was actually the one we probably laughed the hardest in , if I remember correctly I think that was the one then . It was like we're supposed to be . It was the one that we laughed the most in .

Speaker 2 14:51

It was supposed to be about depression oh , and that was the best part of it okay , yeah , I don't even remember that one . Yeah , that was oh one of my favorite things about this season . We did the . We did the incompetence episode . Yeah , and I purposefully misspelled incompetence and no one said anything publicly , but everybody dm'd me about oh and I would just I would just send back a smiley face well , somebody commented on the instagram post I think about it was like , oh , it's supposed to be this .

Speaker 1 15:23

And then you , all you did was comment a smiley face and I was like damn it , josiah , because you want to do this so bad . And I was just like I I don't know if I don't , I don't think we should do that , we're just gonna piss everybody off . So he played a social experiment on you , basically .

Speaker 2 15:38

Oh no , it was more just for my own amusement . I wanted to see how people would respond and how many messages I would get .

Speaker 1 15:49

Well , it sounds like it was well worth it for you , oh man .

Speaker 2 15:54

And then let's see .

Speaker 1 15:56

I like the Spectrum episode a lot A lot more than I thought I would . Yeah , it was fun to talk about , unlike the sociopath episode from what was that season one ?

Speaker 1 16:07

No , two , no , yeah , two I think , and , unlike that one , I feel like I had a lot more answers for the questions and the things that we talked about on that episode and so I felt like it was fun to explore a lot of those different things and to look at how things were . You know , some things might come from things , someone who is on the spectrum , or it might be that they it's just five things , and it's like it's weird how much those overlapped and we didn't go maybe as far as we could have about that in that conversation honestly . But I liked it . It was kind of cathartic for me and it was fun to put it out there and , um see kind of the conversations that have sprung up from that , because I had noticed that that was a pretty if I remember quickly , it's a pretty heavily commented post in our community .

Speaker 2 16:56

Yeah , talking about it ? Yeah , definitely , and I like that . We explored a question that I think we had been asking in the community for a long time and I've not really seen anyone explore that , and then it was also comforting to know that there aren't really any answers yet , because there's not really any good research done , right , yeah , and so it was cool to have that conversation and not really land anywhere too . I actually enjoyed that part of it .

Speaker 1 17:32

It's true . Yeah , it's important to land on that , on that strip of hey . By the way , just healthy reminder .

Speaker 2 17:39

We don't know what we're talking about and neither does anyone else this should be our slogan oh , uh , actually we should make t-shirts yeah , there's some good t-shirt options in the community .

Speaker 1 17:55

We we saw your comments and your pictures and the art . I believe I commented on a few of them . I was I'm all for shirts . I want to do shirts .

Speaker 2 18:03

Maybe that can be our summer project , just in between seasons spinning up a uh like a little swag store . Yeah , yeah , yeah , um . The the other one that I have to call out was when we did family dynamics and we literally talked about my hair for 20 fucking minutes . Oh my god , how could I forget ?

Speaker 1 18:24

you left it all in there . Yes , I did , because , well , and because of course you made a point with it , that kind of was so tied then to all that conversation that I couldn't really it didn't make us , it didn't make sense to to cut it out .

Speaker 1 18:39

But also , too , I was just like I'm watching the minutes while we're talking about it and I know that you went on for at least 24 minutes about it and then , like you gotta add , in the other times where you kept bringing it back up . So it's like , yeah , I couldn't not leave it in there . I left a lot of things in this season that I would not have done probably in the first couple seasons and , yeah , that was also nice . It's

Music and Editing Improvements

Speaker 1 19:07

. My own personal highlight for this season is how much better I got at editing . At least I hope it's better . I hope everybody enjoyed it and the music was . I'm super pumped about . I feel like the music kind of jumped up in quality a lot because I have a much better setup for that , better mics and stuff . I've got to throw in some actual electric guitar and stuff that I don't ever do , so yeah , all that was fun awesome .

Speaker 2 19:34

Well , I love this season . I'm glad we came back . Yeah , I'm glad it . We made it through all of our shit and that we're moving forward and the I'm excited about where we're heading yeah , and we promise pinky swear it will not take a year for another season to come out , we will have it out quicker , much , much quicker . Yeah , all right . Well , thanks everybody , and that's a wrap .

Speaker 1 20:02

All right , we barely made 20 minutes Crazy . All right , bye .

Speaker 2 20:06

We should talk about my hair , yeah .