The People Leaders Podcast

The Art of Managing Up: Crucial Questions for Your Manager

• Jan and Michelle Terkelsen • Episode 149

Share episode

In this episode, we discuss the importance of managing up and making the most out of your relationship with your manager during one-on-one meetings. We explore various questions to ask, such as understanding your manager's key priorities, communication preferences, and ways to build trust. Additionally, we dive into stakeholder management, conflict resolution, and ways to ensure continuous performance improvement. These strategies aim to enhance your performance and showcase your skills effectively, fostering a proactive and productive work environment.

Episode Highlights:

  • 00:35 The Importance of Managing Up
  • 02:56 Key Questions to Ask Your Manager
  • 04:32 Effective Communication Strategies
  • 05:45 Building Trust with Your Manager
  • 07:30 Seeking Specific Advice
  • 08:41 Managing Stakeholder Relationships
  • 09:48 Understanding Top Performers
  • 10:57 Handling Conflict and Difficult Conversations
  • 12:21 Integrating Performance Feedback
  • 13:31 Conclusion and Next Steps

Useful Links

Get in touch with us at info@peopleleaders.com.au
People Leaders Website - https://peopleleaders.com.au/
People Leaders on LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/company/people-leaders-pty-ltd/
Connect with Jan Terkelsen on LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/janterkelsen/
Connect with Michelle Terkelsen on LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/michelle-terkelsen-creating-high-performing-teams-a992744/
Follow us on Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/people.leaders

Speaker 1:

Welcome to the People Leaders Podcast, the audio resource for managers and business leaders creating high-performing teams. Join leadership and team development experts Jen and Michelle Turkelson each week as they explore both subjects from every angle. Through practical tips, valuable insights and compelling interviews with leadership experts around the world, you'll learn how to bring out the best in your staff and how to give your best as a leader.

Speaker 2:

Hi, michelle, hello, and we're back. We are back, all right. So this week we're going to talk about questions, but questions to ask your manager in a one-on-one. So your direct leader or manager and a lot of us hear this term you know managing up and it really is a skill to be able to get the most out of your relationship with the person who is setting expectations. Perhaps they're, you know, have input into your next promotion and role and things like that. So it really is important to get a clear understanding of what they expect, what their world is like and how they operate.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I was talking to someone just today actually, who is about to have their performance conversation, and this is a little bit new to this person, because they are used to being the boss and actually giving all of the performance reviews, and so you know, we talked about it. In fact, you know, changing the mindset to it being done to you, like you know that is, you know you are just this helpless person sitting in front of somebody who has more power, all that, you know. You've got to really flip that mindset and this is about an opportunity to have a one-on-one with someone who you rightly said can, like you know, direct your career, your future. You know, knows more information about what's going on in the business. So use that as an opportunity to ask questions, not just be this passive. You know, receiver of, you know of information and feedback. It's very timely and that's in any conversation, isn't it? You know, like we often talk about the power of one-on-ones when individual contributors can be really proactive in their one-on-ones, it can be a really effective coaching conversation, performance conversation.

Speaker 2:

You know there are so many elements to it and it's another way to show your manager that you're switched on and that you are a good performer, because quite often we actually want our work to speak for us and quite often they don't get to see the level of the detail and the care and the quality that you put into it. So this is a real opportunity for you to actually showcase, and quite often they don't get to see the level of the detail and the care and the quality that you put into it. So this is a real opportunity for you to actually showcase your skills capabilities. Yeah, through your questions. Yeah, okay, so let's get on to them.

Speaker 2:

So the first question that you can ask your manager in a one-on-one is what are your key priorities at the moment? Because what you're doing is you're actually inviting them to share with you where their strategic focus is Now. After they talk about it, then I would add and so what do you think I can support you with? Now? The important thing about this is and I know it seems really basic, but when you're asking a question, you don't want double barrel questions. You want to ask a question, get a fulsome response and then, if there's any detail that you want to explore, then you ask a secondary question. I just find, especially if you're an extrovert, you tend to layer your questions and then you really dilute the impact of those questions and possibly the quality of the response that someone can give you. Great, I love that.

Speaker 2:

So another question is all about getting their perspective on what they see as your priorities. But what you don't want to do is actually hand it over to them and say, okay, so what do you think my key priorities should be? It's more about. Are there key priorities that I should be focusing on that I'm not at the moment, because I see my key priorities as being X, y and Z. Are there other key priorities or pain points for the business that I should be focusing on that I'm not focusing on. So you really want to be mindful that you don't want to.

Speaker 2:

you know, give your manager more work to answer because she's got enough on her plate, yeah, and so the next question is around communication. Now, again, these are options for you. Now you might have regular one-on-ones with your manager, so some of these questions aren't going to be appropriate. It might be a new manager, or it might be the beginning of the year, or a different cycle or a project. So, again, I want you to think about the intention of these questions. So this one is about how do you think it's that we can best communicate, or what's the best way that I can communicate with you? Meaning, do you need a little bit more update? Do you like more detail? Is there anything that I can do to give you a sense of certainty about projects and progress? So, again, give them a little bit of leeway and, I suppose, direction about what you mean in order to communicate best, like how we're going to communicate really effectively together. Love it, love it, love it, love it, because if you don't ask, you won't know. You'll make assumptions and they may be big picture, you may be detail, and they think, oh, this person's not very strategic. They're always, you know, mired in the detail and all vice versa. So great question.

Speaker 2:

So the next one we had a little bit of back and forth about, which is all about this idea of trust and what we do know for sure that really high functioning teams, high functioning relationships, have a foundation of trust. So to that extent, that's why this is such an important sort of conversation to have. However, how do you bring up this issue of trust? Do you ask your manager? So do you trust me? Or know, how do I earn your trust or how do we have a more trusting relationship? But what you could do is actually lead in with this idea of you know, I really want to strengthen my relationship with with you as my manager and with other people in in the. You know that that work, I work with my colleagues, and so I just want to explore, and you may not even use that language. I just want to explore, and you may not even use that language. I just want to explore, but I just want to, you know, talk to you about how do I earn your trust? Or, you know, over the next six months, if you were to say, yeah, I really trust Michelle. You know she has my back, whatever that looks like for you, what would you see me doing? Saying, being that would lead you to say, yeah, I trust you, so that might be a softer way to say it yeah, I love it. And also, when you're asking questions like that, they may not be prepared to give you a fulsome answer, and so it might be. You know, I'd love you know, if you know for you, if you need time to actually think about this, because I really want to nail this aspect of our relationship, because I just know that it will afford us a better working. You know, dynamic, without a doubt. All right.

Speaker 2:

So now the next question is around advice, and the question that I would ask is I would get into specifics. So instead of saying you know, like what is one piece of advice you would give me, I would say something like is is there a piece of advice you could give me that would my skill in leading the team or managing stakeholders, or my written communication. Because then the mind goes from broad and general to quite focused and specific, and when you ask a specific question, the brain kind of knows how to deal with that because it doesn't like ambiguity and it'll pick biased responses. So the more specific you can be with your question, or more focused, it enables the deliverer to give you a quality response. Oh, without a doubt, you want to make this very targeted, because when you have a target and you hit that target, you know what direction to go in. It's as simple as that. There's clarity, and we know that clarity leads to better performance.

Speaker 2:

The next one is probably more for people in a larger organisation perhaps, and it is about stakeholder management or stakeholder relationships, and it is a question that you could ask your manager around. You know, are there people within the business or external to the business that you think I need to develop a stronger relationship with that would benefit the business? So this isn't about your career per se, or it could be about your career like, be honest. So these are the people that I have been working with, external to the team and external to the business, and this is why are there other people you know, external to the team, in the business, that you think would benefit the team? Or you know our business, if I've worked more closely with, and so again, you're, you're, you're on the front foot saying this is what I'm already doing, but do you have anything to add to that? And, as we know, michelle, when we look at high-performing individuals, they're proactive, they actually do what they say they're going to do and then they look forward.

Speaker 2:

All right, the next question is who do you rate as a top performer in the business and why? Because what again you're doing is you're getting an understanding of the criteria of success from that person. So is it about their technical competency around their communication style, their relationship management, and, again, you know you really want to listen and then, based on that response, sometimes then you can self-reflect and so well, where am I in relationship to that being obviously authentic in the way in which you express it? But you're actually gaining a criteria for success. I love that In many organizations we've worked with, they use the LSI and what it does, it's 360 feedback. Lsi. So, and what it does, it's 360 feedback. And there are some people who have extraordinary, you know, positive cooperative profiles and you know, I've always thought wouldn't it be good to share those with the rest of the organisation to highlight ah, this is what good looks like, this is what their peers think of them, and this is why you know to really showcase that good performance. So, yes, I think that's very worthwhile.

Speaker 2:

Okay, the next one is around this issue of conflict, and again you could ask for advice from your manager. If you rate your manager as being someone who is experienced, well-rounded, wise, all that sort of stuff, you know it could be. What I'd like to do is get on the front foot of when there are potential conflicts or difficult conversations. Have you got any advice or tips that you have used over your journey to be where you are that you could share with me? And so, again, you're not asking that person, so what do you do? And then maybe you'll realise actually you don't do that.

Speaker 2:

However, it does create a conversation around it and the other thing that it could lead to, hopefully, is so if there is a difficult conversation you need to have with me or I need to have with you, what do you reckon might be the best way? Because I'd really like to get on the front foot of this so that we do have a good working relationship. So it's a sort of a, like you know, a double edged conversation that you can have advice from them, getting tips, but also, how do we communicate effectively when there is potential for conflict or a difficult conversation? But, again, you have to be prepared to hear the answer and do what you will with that. Yeah, so you know thinking about it. Yeah, I have a bonus one I knew you would.

Speaker 1:

I knew you would Go, go for it.

Speaker 2:

Well, it's actually just. You know we were talking about performance management before and you know a lot of people either think it's you know crap, it doesn't work, and others really try and it can work for you. You know what I mean. Within the system and the structure of what you have, it can work for you, or you just make it work for you. And so the question is if you have been given feedback on your previous performance discussion before you have your next, like performance.

Speaker 2:

You know conversation discussion every now, like every third or fourth. You know one-on-one that you have. Bring in that performance conversation feedback, whether it was you were going to do some. You know learning and development, whether you got some feedback on your competencies in some area, whatever it is. Loop that into the conversation with your manager so that, one, you are being true to the process and two, they are supporting you in achieving your, your goals that you set in the performance process. Yeah, and then you know when you're on track and off track and then you know it gives you such a sense of certainty and then progression, which is a sense of achievement, which feels good, and then you know so it snowballs. Okay, michelle, that was, was enjoyable and ready for the next one. So I think we've got a juicy podcast next time and this is all about team-building activity. So we get a few emails about. I need some team-building ideas. So that's what we're going to work on for our next podcast.

Speaker 1:

Oh fun fun, fun.

Speaker 2:

And if anyone has any questions that they want us to deep dive into and explore, please just send us an email at info at peopleleaderscomau. Okay, see you, michelle. Ciao, for now.

Speaker 1:

Thank you for joining us on the People Leaders Podcast. For show notes and other resources, please visit us at peopleleaderspodcastcom. If you have a leadership or management question or subject you'd like covered on the podcast, please contact us at podcast at peopleleaderscomau. The People Leaders Podcast is brought to you by the Experts On Air Podcast Network.