#35: Your Jordans Can Handle Confetti — Why Your Heart Needs Lent

Ever notice how faith slips from alive to automatic without a dramatic moment or decision? Desireé shines a light on that quiet drift and offers a clear way back, using Joel 2:12–13 and Psalm 51:10 as a practical map.

We talk about why hearts grow tired, how routine replaces wonder, and why Lent is less about gritting our teeth and more about making space for grace. We explore the difference between performing for God and returning to God with our whole, imperfect selves.

Desireé shares three nightly questions that spark awareness and intimacy with God:
Where did I sense Him today?
Where did I feel distant?
What stirred my heart?

These prompts pair with a simple, powerful prayer that becomes a handrail when life shakes us. You’ll also walk through a vivid, guided reflection.

If your days feel full but your soul feels thin, this conversation offers relief and direction. Expect practical spiritual habits, honest talk about busyness, and a renewed sense that God is gracious, compassionate, and near.

We are throwing around encouragement like confetti once again... and possibly getting it all over your J's! If this episode helped you exhale, share it with a friend, leave a review, and subscribe so you don’t miss the rest of our Lent series.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:06

Ciao and welcome to Life Out Loud. I am your host, Desiree Melfi Bozzo. We are going to use this space to share experiences and help you find lasting, unshakable, unwavering, unmessable with joy and gratitude. We're going to be throwing around encouragement a little bit like confetti and giving you support to live your very best life. Ciao friends, welcome back to the Life Out Loud Podcast.

Lent And Returning To God

Rend Your Heart Not Garments

How Spiritual Drift Begins

From Relationship To Routine

Lent Disrupts The Drift

Three Questions To Ponder

Create In Me A Clean Heart

Guided Reflection At The Cross

Daily Awareness Practices

Prayer In Life’s Friction

Closing And Next Steps

SPEAKER_01 0:33

I'm your host, Desiree Melfi Boats. So we are in episode 35. And today, since from Lent, we're going to dive into this notion of returning to God. And last time we met, episode 34, we talked about preparing, prepare what? Preparing our hearts. And we visited Joel 2 verses 12 and 13. Today we're actually going to revisit those, but in a different way. So I'm going to read it first and then I'm going to dive in and I have two scriptures for you today. So Joel 2, 12 and 13, even now, declares the Lord, when? Right now. Yep. Now. Even now, declares the Lord, return to me with all your heart with fasting and weeping and mourning. Now, if you remember from last episode, we dove into those three. So if you're interested in the fasting and the weeping in the mourning, check out episode 34. Verse 13 goes on to say, Rend your heart and not your garments. We know that rend means to tear, to break open, to rip apart. Back in the Old Testament, people would uh tear their clothing and anger and grief and emotional distress. God's saying, don't do that anymore. Do that to your heart. Rend your heart and not your garments. Return to the Lord your God, for he is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger, abounding in love, and he relents from sending calamity. So I'm gonna dive into this notion of returning. Now, some of us, not all, no rarely, let's start there. Rarely do people wake up and go, Today I'm drifting. Today's the day I'm walking away from God. Peace out. I'm doing this on my own. Let's go. That doesn't happen. That's not a thing. Okay. So we don't just decide to walk away from God. We drift. It's subtle and it's gradual. Most of the time, it's completely unnoticeable until it's not. That's a real thing. Nobody really notices until it's not, right? So, I mean, didn't really notice I gained a whole bunch of weight, uh what, five few couple few years ago. And then all of a sudden my endware didn't fit, right? Like that's a real thing. You're like, what does this have to do with? I'm going somewhere, I promise. We don't notice the drift until something falls into place that shouldn't be in that place, right? It's never intentional, it's rarely intentional, it's unnoticeable. We get busy, we get tired, we get into bad habits that just compound and compound and compound until suddenly. Never suddenly. Somewhere along the way, our intentional relationship with God shifts from being this thing that we're focused on to being this routine that we are in, maybe an obligation that we're forced to do. There is nothing about God that is routine or an obligation. What he wants from us is relationship. He wants our whole heart. We see this in human relationships all the time, this notion of drift. We see it in marriages all the time, more times than I even would love to admit. I've seen it, I've seen it in my own marriage. We've been married almost almost 20 years. I've seen it there. I've seen it in friends' marriage. It's like there's a drift that takes place, and it's usually not intentional, but you're busy doing the things, right? And you're focused on other things, and then all of a sudden you're not focused on each other. So you went from being these adorable, cute, newlyweds, just loving each other to being like roommates, right? It happens. It happens in friendships. You lose track of people, you lose touch with people because you're not intentional. Your lives are in different phases and things, and it happens, it's adrift. It's because relationships take work and it goes from being intentional to routine because we stop standing guard over the doors of our hearts. Happens with our God, it happens with our spouses, it happens with our friends, it happens with our family. So when we turn to Lent, we have to think. So I said last episode, I used to sing things, what? I used to think of Lent as this punishment. It's not. It's our time to make space and to tune into God who stands there whispering, come back, return to me with all your heart. I'm gracious, I'm compassionate, come back, come this way. God also, I think it's worth pointing out. He's not saying, hey, return when you're perfect, though, okay? Come back, but make sure you're polished and consistent. Come back, but make sure you're tidy. God's not saying any of that. He's saying, come back imperfect, come back when you need some polishing. Come back even if you've been inconsistent. Sometimes we get so busy holding everything else together that we've accidentally let go of our hearts. And so the drift shows up. We don't mean to, it's not intentional, and yet it happens. Lent is amazing because it comes to disrupt the drift. And so I love the time of, I don't love the time of year, but also I love the time of year when Lent shows up. Usually, today I mean today it's sunny, that's great, but it is bitter cold. For some reason, February just seems kind of like the heaviest month, which is crazy because we're like totally coming right off of like Valentine's Day, like literally the Hallmark holiday for love. I mean, I just, but February is just February nonetheless, and sometimes it's just heavy. And I love that Lent comes comes in to draw us back to God, to draw us out of the drift. Our New Year's resolutions are probably like, what are those, right? Maybe we've probably forgotten them. I know the gym's a whole lot less empty, which is great for leg day when I need all the machines. Anyway, I digress. I want to give you three questions to ponder on your heart about Lent disrupting this drift. So if you have something to write, write it down. If you don't, just I don't know. We'll I'll post them. Where is your heart grown quiet? Also, for quiet, you can replace it with cynical, resigned. Yeah, it's just the way that is. That's whatever. It's just giving up on that. What? Nope. Where where is your heart grown quiet? Start noticing those places. Where is passion gone from this amazing energetic boil to like just lukewarm? Kind of cool. Eh, meh is like the emotion for that that question. Where is it just went meh, right? Last one. Oh, this one's a heavy one. What has removed God from his place as first love in your life? We know that it goes God, spouse, children, in that order. Sometimes responsibilities get you out of that order, but like that's the order that God has established for us. God, then our spouses, then our children. When we get any of those confused in the wrong place, chaos ensues. Don't let that happen. God's not asking us during Lent. He's not saying try harder. Why don't you hustle a little bit more, Des? Why don't you just give me a little bit more grit? Give me more of that Des hustle. Give me just a little bit more, you know, tenacity, maybe some relentlessness. Let's just bump up the energy. He's not saying any of that. He's saying, get real quiet and get real honest with me. I want to point you to Psalms. Psalm 51 verses. I'm sorry, just one verse. Psalm 51, verse 10. Just one verse here. Create in me pure heart, oh God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Psalm 51, 10. David, I can't wait to get to heaven and have coffee with David. I don't know if they do coffee in heaven. I hope they do. If they don't, maybe it's like some great herbal. I don't know. I can't wait to sit down with David and just, I got a lot of questions for him. He penned these words and he wasn't praying, God, make me more productive, right? Like, like creating me a pure heart, make me more productive, God. No, he was what? No, he wasn't saying, just give me more willpower so I can just go muscle through and do the thing on my own, God. David didn't pray for any of that. He prayed for a clean heart. And David also knew something about God that I don't know if many of us keep in mind because we're temporal beings in this world we can taste and touch and see and smell and hear and all the things, and it's enticing and it captivates our senses. But David knew God doesn't work on the ways of the world. See, God works from the inside out. God changes our heart. So David prayed for a clean heart, and he knew God works from the inside out. So he prayed over that. He understood how God worked. I think we need to get really honest about the state of our hearts these days. I think we need to sit and we need to admit some things, not to like the world. Don't go put it on Facebook for God's sakes, but maybe just to yourself, maybe to your spouse, maybe to your people. We need to admit to God our spiritual distraction, the places that have taken the place of God. Where does that happen? We need to admit that sometimes we're we pull a little Mary Martha action and we start running around doing all the things because we have lots of obligations, things to do, and kids to get places and jobs and careers and spouses, and we have all different events to go to, and we're on boards and we go to gallas and we do all the things and we go to all the events and we have dinners. And when's the last time you sat at the foot of the cross? And I'm not just saying this to you, I'm saying this for me, like from me, like this is applies to me. I'm preaching to myself here, right? Sometimes we have to admit where we've let comparison or judgment or resentment or anxiety or anger or like insert your thing, where we've let that take up more space than worship. So all of that in mind, creating me a clean heart. Oh God, renew a steadfast spirit within me. I want you to close your eyes for a minute. And I want you to imagine something. If you're driving, if you're operating heavy machinery, like I say every time, don't close your eyes. Stick with your job, stick with what you're doing. But, and if you can, close your eyes. If you have to go somewhere, get go, I don't know, sit in a bathroom stall, whatever you have to do. Get real quiet. Get into a place where it's just you and God. And in your heart, I want you to answer the question: what has quietly, ever so quietly, snuck in and taken God's place in my heart? What's the thing? What's done it? Could be improval, could be accomplishment, could be control, could be distraction, could be noise, could be the pull of social media, scrolling, conspiracy fear, all the things that capture our attention. What's taking the place of God in your heart? We all have something. Now, don't beat yourself up over it first. It's not meant to beat yourself up or talk down to yourself about how you got here. It doesn't, that's not the point. The point is call it to mind. And I want you to imagine something. I want you to imagine that cross on Calvary. I want you to imagine walking up. I want you to hear the crunch of the dirt beneath your feet. I want you to imagine walking up to that cross and taking that thing that's taken God's place in your heart. And I want you to imagine laying it in the dirt. If you need to, have a good cry over it. If you need to, you know, let the emotion flow, but also let it go. Put it in the dirt and hand it over to Jesus at the foot of the cross. It's time to return. It's time to return to him because he has literally never left you. Even on your worst days when you feel like you were the furthest from him. What's the footprints in the sand poem like he was carrying you? Now, open your eyes. You've laid it at the foot of the cross. You've walked away from it. Repent. Do the things you have to do. Get your heart right. Create in me a clean heart, oh God. Renew a steadfast spirit within me. Right now we're in a mercy season. Lent is a mercy season. It's a forgiveness season. It's a grace season. Lean into it. This week, I want you to practice noticing a couple things. And if do this, write these down also, but do these at night. Do these, you know, before before you crawl into bed, get on your knees at the side of the bed and just close your eyes and just call this to mind as you pray. Share them with your spouse. Maybe that's like a thing. Hey, I want to I want to talk to you about these things. And then ask them, like, what about you? Where did this happen for you? Or like, go sit somewhere quietly if you want to like just meditate on it, right? Why don't you practice noticing three things? First one is, where did I sense God today? He's there. He's there every moment of every second of every day. Where'd you sense him? Where did he show up? I want you to ask the question where did I feel distant? Where was I so in it that I didn't feel God? Or I didn't feel close, or I didn't feel in proximity with him. Where did I feel distant? And the last question is what stirred my heart? I might not have known it was stirring at the time. I just felt like, whoa, that was something, right? That was a Holy Spirit. What stirred your heart today? Asking those three questions brings awareness, and awareness brings returning. It's super easy to go through life on autopilot. It's so easy to go through life. Just one thing to the next, following our schedules, following our tasks, following our to-do lists. But when we go through life on autopilot, we miss life. We miss the richness. We miss all of those things that are amazing from God. Awareness leads to the returning, and he's calling you, saying, return to me with all your heart. This week, when you find yourself stuck in your stuff, create in me a clean heart, oh God. That person cuts me off. Create in me a clean heart, oh God. You get some, you know, crappy news. Create in me a clean heart, oh God. Your friend treats you like crap. Created me a clean heart, oh God. I don't want to go there. Don't want to have those awful feelings about that person. Don't want, you know, do the thing I know I shouldn't be doing. Do it. Whatever that thing is, whatever happens in your life, because life is going to happen. That's the one thing we know for certain. Created me a clean heart, oh God. Pull yourself into greatness. Pray yourself into greatness some days. Let's be honest. Not easy. Friends, I hope this was fruitful. I hope you were able to just let some weight fall off your shoulders through this. You don't have to be perfect. You just have to consistently go back to God. You have to just consistently talk to him, keep him first and foremost in your life. Keep him on that throne of your days. So with that, this concludes episode 35 of the Life Out Loud Podcast. Come back next time. We're going to continue the Lent series. That's going to happen. I'm going to keep going with this for the next six weeks, five weeks, a few weeks, a bunch of weeks till Easter. We're going to keep doing it. Come back next time. We're going to throw more encouragement around like confetti. Be careful. If you get too close, it's going to get all of your Jays and get all mad, but whatever. It's fine. Encouragement comes off Jordans. Whatever. Right? It does. I think it does. Or it makes them look better. Either way, have a fantastic rest of your week.

SPEAKER_00 18:07

Cheers. Thank you for joining me, Desiree Melfi Bozzo, for this episode of Life Out Loud. I would love to hear from you. Leave me a comment, tell me what topics you want to talk about, and how you take your coffee. If you enjoyed what you heard, text a friend the link, share it on social media, or if you're interested in becoming a supporter, beep up over to my webpage, lifeoutloud.me and sponsor a cup of coffee that keeps this podcast fueled. Until next time, sweet listeners.