Laker Jim’s Fletch Cast
Laker Jim’s Fletch Cast
Fletch Quote Bracket Madness (Part 2) The Finals
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EPISODE 25: AND THE WINNER IS...
The exciting conclusion to the Fletch Quote Madness Tournament. Two of the greatest Fletch Quotes (Moooooon River and It's ALL Ball Bearings) will be going head to head to determine the greatest Fletch Quote of 2022. Who will be crowned the Champion? Listen & find out!
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FletchCast is Your Ultimate source for everything Fletch: the books, the movies, & the latest news about our favorite journalistic reporter, Irwin M. Fletcher... making sure Fletch Lives forever!
Host: James "Laker Jim" Kanowitz (@webguy911)
Co-Host: Jake Parrish (@jakelparrish)
Co-Host: Bob West
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Fletch & Fletch Lives are Copyright 1985, 1989 Universal Studios and distributed by MCA/Universal Pictures. The Fletch Soundtrack is Copyright MCA Records.
All images and sounds are the intellectual property of Universal Studios. They are used only with the intent of public appreciation of a great film and possible
publicity for its place among the great comedies of our time. We imply no rights to the characters created by both Gregory McDonald and Universal.
FletchCast is Your Ultimate source for everything Fletch: the books, the movies, & the latest news about our favorite journalistic reporter, Irwin M. Fletcher.
... making sure Fletch Lives forever!
Host: James "Laker Jim" Kanowitz (@webguy911)
Co-Host: Jake Parrish (@jakelparrish)
Co-Host: Robert "Big Bob" West
Follow Us on Social Media:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/imfletchcast/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/imfletchcast
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P.S. Have a nice day.
Fletch & Fletch Lives are Copyright 1985, 1989 Universal Studios and distributed by MCA/Universal Pictures. The Fletch Soundtrack is Copyright MCA Records. Confess, Fletch is Copyright of Miramax with Paramount distribution. All images and sounds are the intellectual property of Universal Studios. They are used only with the intent of public appreciation of a great film and possible publicity for its place among the great comedies of our time. We imply no rights to the characters or intellectual property created by Gregory McDonald, Universal or Miramax and is used for educational purposes only.
Broadcasting live and around the world from Cabana One the only podcast with all bearings your ultimate stores for everything flat take it up starting like a jam and it's paperwork to make it for flat forever forever They don't shower much.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzThank you, Sammy, and welcome Fletch Fans to a historic episode of Fletchcast. Today, we will crown the Chick-earn Memorial Fletchcast book of the year. Joining me as always, Jake and Big Bob Boys. When we arrived to the Sportal Realty.com arena this morning, we were shocked to see that the fans have remained here since last Thursday. Yes, no one told them to leave. They've been here chanting, doing the wave. Luckily, they don't shower much.
Jake ParrishYeah. A lot of blood, sweat, and tears. I mean, it looks like a war zone down there on the floor. It was a bloodbath down there.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzEverything is covered in manure. When that quote went down, it jackknifed hard.
Jake ParrishBut two survived.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzThe Moon River people have had the wave going for now three and a half days. Yep. And sadly that will come to an end today.
Jake ParrishAnd when you look back at these quotes, these two, I really do think that these two are the most popular. And I think when you hear them, for a lot of people, you immediately think of Fletch.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzWhat Fletch quote would you say had the most disappointing season? Hmm. Much like the Lakers of today. Yes. Red the Dwarf Dorfman not qualifying for the tournament was a huge fluff.
Jake ParrishWell, and there was a couple other ones that we heard on social media that didn't even get into the tournament. Like, he draws the foul. That one didn't even make it.
"Big Bob" WestYeah, he draws the foul. It was a big mess.
Jake ParrishYeah. That didn't get in.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzThey'll have their opportunity next year to compete again.
"Big Bob" WestOne thing to keep in mind, too, is that these were all Chevy Chase Erwin M. Fletcher quotes. So who knows? Maybe next year we'll go with a different format. Maybe we'll do non-fletcher lived quotes. Maybe we'll do Fletch Lives. Maybe we'll uh we'll we'll ask our uh loyal audience what they think we should.
Jake ParrishI I think that's a great idea. I think we could go in a lot of different directions as the years away, you know, go on. So I think we'll be fine. I think we'll be fine. We have a lot of uh material to still mine when it comes to Fletch quotes. Plus, we could always look at some of the quotes in the books and how they compare to the movies, too. Oh, book quotes. You really wanted to see that John Castos too. I know, I know, because that was really one of the ones that that was as close to the book. Because I think in the book Yemis Strinsky or something like that, I think that's what he said. So it was close. So that one was kind of near and dear to my heart, and I wish it would have gone on a little bit more in the tournament.
"Big Bob" WestBut well, I think I think it got as far as you could possibly go. Right. Laker Jim, you know, you asked, you know, were you surprised to see any go early? Um sugar Mr. Poon, no never never. Uh, I was a little surprised it didn't go as you know to the end. Yeah. Because no never never is something that I say constantly. So, you know, really there's so many to that. But but again, tough competition all around, and the two winners that we have, the two bohemist, the two giant quotes that we have, I think are very deserving of being in the finals.
Jake ParrishNow, correct me if I'm wrong. Were both of these quotes that are left, were they one seeds? Both quotes that are remaining were one seeds. Okay, so we do have two of the most popular ones. And that's also why we had to take the power out of our hands and give it to our audience. You're right, because it's hard for us to decide because we have so much love for both of them.
"Big Bob" WestAnd this isn't something that should be decided by just three men. This should be decided by everybody.
Jake ParrishAre we? All three of us? Let me oh yes. We're not men, that's for sure.
"Big Bob" WestWe are not.
Jake ParrishUh I know you like to be manhandled, right? Isn't that what he says? I don't like to be manhandled. I like you, Bob. That's for sure.
unknownThank you.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzAll right, now listen, guys, before we make up our final vote, let's analyze the two remaining quotes right now.
SPEAKER_10Tonight championship matchup. Moon River. Thank you, Doc. You ever serve time? It's so simple. Maybe you need a refresher course. Hey, it's all ball bearings nowadays.
SPEAKER_04Here's the tip. Four seconds, three, fifty.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzLet's do a little deep dive, like we always do, into the Moon River quote. Because a lot of times we just repeat the quote because it's a great funny quote. We fail sometimes to realize the meaning behind the quote or where it came from or the history behind it. So the song Moon River was actually written for Audrey Hepburn to sing in the movie Breakfast of Tiffany's back in 1961.
SPEAKER_09Drop your shorts and bend over.
SPEAKER_00I'm crossing you in style someday.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzWas that Henry Mancini? Yes, and it actually won an Academy Award for Best Original Song.
Jake ParrishThat's what I thought. Yeah, yeah. So Chuppi was actually belting out a classic. Yeah, it's got some clouts. And Mancini had a great you know reputation. He did the Pink Panther theme, he did a ton of great stuff.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzAnd I think what makes this quote extra special and really excelled in this tournament was the fact that a quote that can be delivered in duress, you know, yes, a quote that can be delivered when you're not really prepared for the moment.
"Big Bob" WestRight, right. A reactionary quote, you know, something like you stub your toe or you get shot. You know, if I got if I ever got shot, I would immediately shut out Moon River.
SPEAKER_04I know that about myself.
unknownRight.
Jake ParrishMy question is what is the correlation between a cavity examination and the song Moon River, you know? Well, he's he's up as you know, they say you're mooning someone when you're showing them your backside. Well, that's true. Yes. You're right. That's a that's a very good point. I never even thought about that. That makes perfect sense.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzYou know, much like we saw Chris Rock during the Will Smith um incident at the Oscars, when Chris Rock was able to come back with that immediate quick joke about having the the shit slapped out of him, that was very much like Moon River. Yeah, yeah. A very reactionary quote that you have to be really sharp to deliver that type of quote out of the blue.
"Big Bob" WestAnd you know what I was just thinking too? You know, if if he's using the whole fist, Fletch in that case would be wider than a mile. And that is the next follow-up line. You know, so those thinkers.
Jake ParrishThe ample amount of lubrication, is that what you're saying? A very generous amount. Well, you saw it.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzI mean, you know. I wonder what a duet between Audrey Hepburn and Chevy would have sounded like. I think they're on two different pitches, but you're a serve time.
"Big Bob" WestAnd by the way, something else to consider, second time rubber gloves are mentioned in the or not mentioned, but but kind of brought up in the movie, too. There's a there's a rolling scene there. Like I say, I know you're a big memorability guy. Didn't you once own a M Mm at Walsh autographed rubber gloves?
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzI did. I actually still have them. I do still have them. The problem was the latex crack over the. I'll dig it up.
"Big Bob" WestHe signed it very beautifully, it's a very beautiful graph. Not an easy thing to sign either. No, I have to have four sets of hand stretching that thing out, and then he signed it with like a gel pen type of thing.
Jake ParrishAnd oh, that's that's he always seems like a really good guy, and he was so good in that scene.
"Big Bob" WestYeah, I love him and everything he's in.
Jake ParrishWe did the recasting episode, but when we look at it, he's just so perfect, so deadpan.
"Big Bob" WestAnd he and he was also he was also somebody we had in the uh record gym before, too. We talked about his other movies we love, and you know you mentioned uh back to school for one, too. It's just everything he's in is just fantastic.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzWell, since we're on the topic, let's hear M. Emmett's Walsh's opinion on the scene featuring Moon River.
SPEAKER_09The great scenes. I mean, Chevy's very proud of it, I know, because I've I've heard references uh, you know, of that it's it's a bell, it's a beautiful little scene that rings like a bell. And it was a semi-improv on Chevy's part, you know, the Moon River and using your whole fist dock. Thank you, Doc. You ever serve time? Breathe, easy, and uh it played very well. The scene is just a perfect little scene.
"Big Bob" WestSo hang on. First, first thing I gotta say, does everyone call him Chevy and not realize it's Chevy or is it not Chevy? Have we been wrong all these years? Are we the ones that are crazy? Why is everybody involved in Chevy calling him Chevy? Burton William called him Chevy. Um Athens.
Jake ParrishMaybe it's just a great, maybe it's just the years of good marketing from the Chevy Corporation that they've just it's just been ingrained into them that when they think or see that word, they say Chevy. Subconsciously they pronounce it. Right, right, because they're thinking of the automobile. It is very, very strange. All right, anyway. That took me, by the way, him calling him Chevy took me completely out of that course. I I missed the whole thing. But he's right, it is a nice little scene, and it's very funny, and I I think we can agree that it's probably one of the most popular scenes from the movie. Do we know for sure Jim in the script was Moon River in the script or was using the whole fist line in the script? Do you remember?
"Big Bob" WestGreat question. Were those improved or were those were they in the book? No, they were in the room.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzGive me a second, I'll go I'll go run again. It's right here. Hold on.
"Big Bob" WestOkay. Yeah, that's definitely worth it. That's a great question. That's worth a little bit of inspection.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzHere's Fletch and Frank. Dr. Dolan. Alright, guys, I'm looking at the script, and here's the differences between the scene and the line and the quote. Dr. Dolan tells Fletch, just relax, and he says, Honestly, I feel fine. You better be married. He puts him into position. Fletch says, Did I say my kidneys? I meant my ear. Okay, that's not in it. I wish that was left in. Dolan starts the probe from behind. Fletch says, Ever serve time. Dolan says, breathe easy. And Fletch says, anyway, I was surprised Alan got the policy so easily. I know there's a history of cancer in the family. So Moon River's improvised and ever served time is in the and he says, Whoa, look out there. You really need you really needed the whole fist. He says, just relax. And he says, I can't discuss another patient. Well, I can't find anything wrong with you. So yeah, so the Moon River part is not in the screen. Okay.
"Big Bob" WestThat was an improvised scene by Chevy. Maybe Chevy just watched Breakfast of Tiffany's, or maybe he just heard that song that day. You never know. But great, what a great improvised line. And again, no shock that one of the lines that is considered one of the best lines by us, and I'm sure everybody else is improvised. It shows how 100% talented Chevy was in this video.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzWe have one more castmate that wants to chime in on this on this quote. It's Marvin Gillette. Okay. So let's hear what George Weiner has to say about the famous Moon River line.
SPEAKER_03Um it's hard to pull out just one scene from the movie, but uh I've I must say that Moon River's never sounded quite the same ever since. I used to love that song, and now I so my the association ruined it for me.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzBig Audrey Hepburn fan.
SPEAKER_03Thank you.
Jake ParrishReally seems like the uh his delivery of Moon River has ruined that song for a lot of people. Well, I think you I think he's right. I think when you hear Moon River today, you don't think of Audrey Hepburn and Breakfast Tiffany's. You immediately think of Fletch. Without a doubt.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzAnd so I guess Gillette's rooting for all ball bearings. That sounds like he might be. Between Dolan and Gillette, it's a split. It's a split. Dolan's voting river and Gillette's voting ball bearings. So speaking of ball bearings, let's talk about the other quote that's up for the championship title tonight.
SPEAKER_10Oh, come on, guys. It's so simple. Maybe you need a refresher course. Hey, it's all ball bearings nowadays.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzNow we can all agree that it's one of our three favorite scenes, and I think favorite scenes of Fletch fans everywhere. You know, and I think our interview with Burton Gilliam really made our love for this scene and a love for the characters and a love for the quotes within that scene even stronger than they were before.
Jake ParrishBall bearings are just that, ball bearings, but obviously after the movie, it's it has taken on a whole new meaning, I think, in in society and in culture and pop culture. Um because when you think ball bearings, I I just don't understand how you can't immediately think of that scene. Now, when it comes to ball bearings, I often find myself asking the question, what the hell do you need ball bearings for?
"Big Bob" WestBob, you usually have that info. Um I'm no engineer, but uh they uh there they're the technical definition is that the purpose of a ball bearing is to reduce rotational friction and support radial and axial load.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzCarls, I had Larry pull the microfiche, and here's all the information that she could find on ball bearings. Let's take a listen.
SPEAKER_01Let's take a closer look at a classic ball bearing. How do bearings work?
SPEAKER_10Maybe you need a refresher course.
SPEAKER_01Bearings are used to reduce the friction between two objects that are in linear or circular motion against each other. The first intuition came from Leonardo da Vinci in his studies regarding friction. Then, a Parisian bicycle mechanic named Jules Surrey was able to patent the first ball bearing on August 3rd, 1869. This invention allows him to win the first cycling race in history.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzAlright, Bob, so you were pretty pretty close. You were pretty basically right, I get it. Yes. Wonder if Da Vinci's worth 30 ways.
"Big Bob" WestYeah, they facilitate motion essentially. So they make sure that things keep spinning. I gotcha. But okay, what about the gauze pads? Every engineer has their own way of doing things. So funny. I you know, you know what's funny though? If you now this is hilarious, if you Google search Fetcher Valve, Fletch and Chevy Chase come up in the search results.
Jake ParrishWell, it's true. When you Google it, as far as then they show like video clips, it's the first thing that comes up. How great is that? That's so great. Actually, this is totally random, but there's actually a Twitter account at Fetzerval, and the picture, the profile picture is Chevy and Burton Gilliam. Look at that, it's right there. I'm looking at the exact same thing you are. Yes, I I have that.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, give them a follow.
Jake ParrishOh my god, that is sweet. We are now the 12th follower. Oh my gosh, so smart. I'm sure a follow of them must get them going again. Actually, there's more than one Fetzer Valve. If you do a Google search or uh search on Twitter, there's one, two, three, four accounts. There's at Fetzer Valves, uh, another one named Fetzer Valve, seven Fetzer Valve, and Fetzer Valve, and they all have pictures of Chevy.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzCome on, Twitter, verify the real Fetzer Valve. Seven accounts, it's nuts.
"Big Bob" WestTo our listeners that are that are so loyal to us, if you haven't yet listened to our Burton Gilliam episode, go back and give it a listen.
Jake ParrishOh, yeah.
"Big Bob" WestBecause he he has a great story all about uh that scene and also um you know the the Quaker State story he tells about the oil and his endorsement. You know, give it a listen if you haven't yet. It is a great, great explanation of the scene. A lot of details that you would never know.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzUh no, back here.
"Big Bob" WestYeah, it's it's great. All right, guys. I think now is the time now to find out. Oh man. Are you re are you guys ready for this? I'm sweating. How many nights of sleep have you lost just thinking about this? Both of you. I don't know. I'll be honest. I'm not gonna I lost two nights of sleep. But it's only been how many days? Five days, six days?
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzNow we have had this poll up since our last episode dropped. Yeah, and hundreds of Fletch fans have voted since.
Jake ParrishYes. Should we get a drum roll?
"Big Bob" WestI thought we were gonna do the Christmas vacation drum roll.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzNow the winner won 53% of the vote. So it was very, very close. Very, very close. The winning quote only won by 11 votes. Wow.
SPEAKER_04Mm-hmm.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzNot surprising. This thing was this thing was like a seesaw all the week, weekend long. And it was one particular day where one of them beat the other by by this amount. By 11 votes.
SPEAKER_04Mm-hmm.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzWow. All right, let's do this. Hey, let's turn the uh the crowd mic up a little bit so we can hear the crowd. That's perfect. All right, everybody. 32 of the greatest fletch quotes of all time entered the tournament in hopes that they would be standing here at this moment tonight. Two quotes are remaining. Then with one more win, one quote will receive Fletch Immortality. The winner of the 2022 Jake Hern Memorial Fletch Cast, Fletch Quote Championship is. It's all ball bearings.
SPEAKER_05Wow. Wow.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzWhat a ride it's been.
SPEAKER_05What a tournament. Um thank God Vegas was taking bets on this. I I just want a fortune.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzI'm I was glad that our votes didn't need to decide the winner because I mean, I think we can go around the room. Jake, what were you gonna vote for?
Jake ParrishAs much as Moon River means to me, and we talked about this on the last episode, how it all started with the message board. I think it's all ball bearings, is is just more quotable. I think it is used more. I think uh I think a lot more people remember it. Yeah, I think it's like I said, it's really taking its place in pop culture now.
"Big Bob" WestI can't think of a of a situation where I could slide Moon River into a conversation you know, seamlessly and easily without without there being a reason to do it. Whereas it's all ball bearings, just fits naturally into any conversation, you know. Yeah. Anytime someone doesn't understand what you're doing, all you have to do is explain them it's all ball bearings.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzI would have also gone ball bearings as well, so it would have been a clean sweep amongst us, but it wouldn't have mattered because the fans voted, the fans picked the one they wanted to see. And the fans were very passionate about it, even in the comments on Twitter and Instagram and Facebook. Right. People were very passionate about their picks. They wanted us to know who they picked and why they picked it. So, you know, I I just want to thank everybody that contributed to this championship tournament. It was a lot of fun.
"Big Bob" WestAnd hats hats off to Moon River, you know. I it may have not have won this time around, and but still, you know, a hell of a competitor to make it that far.
Jake ParrishYeah, yeah, it gave it a great run. Uh LJ, is the ball bearing slide in the script?
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzNo, now obviously we know the whole scene is not in the script. Right. So now that's a great point. I mean, really, what it came down to it was two things that were not scripted. I mean, the the airplane hanger scene was scripted, but as we found out from the Burton Gilliam interview, him and Chevy went off on their own and they re-winged the dialogue. Yep. So two lines that were completely improvised wound up taking on each other for the title The Greatest Fletch Quote of 2022.
Jake ParrishAnd we have to give credit to Chevy or Chevy, as some people like to call him, because it was all on him. It was all on him. So, you know, big props to him. Uh he really had the knowledge and the improv skills to really. Pull out some great one-liners. So that just shows the talent that he has that you know 35 written years removed, we're still talking about it.
"Big Bob" WestThe quotes that are scripted, the quotes that are not script scripted are just so legendary. Just one of the most quotable movies of all time. And I can't wait to do this again for Fletch Lives and non-fletch related quotes and every anything else that we want to do along the way. This was a great, great time doing it. I'm gonna put you both on the spot right now. What quote comes to mind just off the top of your head? That's not gonna be your favorite quote, but if I were to say, give me a non-fletch, non-Tevi quote, which one comes to mind? I'll go first. I'll go first. Just because I I I said this quote today. I'm gonna say uh a quote that comes to mind for me is Velma makes the most unusual lemonade. And I asked that I I bring that quote up. What do you think is in Velma's lemonade that makes it so unusual?
Jake ParrishI think for me, you're skating on thin ice, Larry. It's probably yeah, one of my favorite, you know, non-fletch Frank lines.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzYeah. And without putting any thought into it when you said it, the first quote that came to my mind is what are you doing? Some stunt flying or something? Well, of course. Yeah, yeah, it's true.
"Big Bob" WestYeah, that was a lot fletched quote that that came to mind first. Yeah, it's gonna be fun doing this again. I can't wait.
Jake ParrishBut I think that's a great idea. We should be pulling lines from from supporting characters because they are a lot of great ones in that one.
"Big Bob" WestSo I mean we could match we could do 64 lines easy. Yeah, we won't. Yeah, we won't do that, but we'll do 32 again, maybe maybe when it comes, it comes.
Jake ParrishHey, that was another one that didn't make it, did it? Uh talking about communists, are you? It did, it was a playing quote line. Oh, that's right. It was that's right. I remember that now.
"Big Bob" WestYeah, that's right. So, but yeah, there were there were so many that didn't make it.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzYeah, I would say the standout quotes that didn't make it were uh Fred the Dorf Dorfman, which I really think could have made some noise in this tournament.
Jake ParrishAnd he draws the foul, I think is one. Another one is I don't like to discuss my business on the Lanai.
"Big Bob" WestYeah, yeah. If you're wearing rubbers, leave them outside. You know what? Uh if you're wearing that whole scene. Maybe what I'll do is I'll take not 32, but maybe 16 or 8 quotes that didn't make it, and we'll have an NIT tournament. What do you guys think?
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzAh, I'd be all right with that. You know, they should compete almost like the Olympics, where they have to they have to qualify for next year. You know what I mean? Yeah, and they got too much.
"Big Bob" WestThat's great. That's a great idea. Maybe we'll have one division of the quotes that didn't make it going next year's tournament.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzAll right, flex fans. Well, listen, we'd like to thank all you guys for participating with us. All you we really, really appreciate it. It's been a lot of fun for us. I loved it. I think it was great. We have one more episode left in season two, and then we're gonna take a little break. We're gonna take a little hiatus, having a baby on Thursday.
Jake ParrishYay! How about that? Congratulations.
"Laker Jim" James KanowitzVery, very soon. So, uh, for Jake and Bob, I'm Linker Jim. Time to close this one out, Chick.
FletchCast IntroGame's in the refrigerator, the door is closed, the light's out, butter's getting hard, the eggs are cooling, and the jelly is jiggling. We'll see ya. See ya.
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