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Can+Did, a TN Voices Podcast
Can+Did, a TN Voices Podcast
Best me in 2023: Achieving Self-Care
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Join Rikki Harris, CEO of TN Voices, & Will Voss, COO of TN Voices, as they reflect on 2022 and what they want to lean into in 2023. Listen in as these leaders discuss how to successfully guide their teams to a year of self-care and betterment.
Candid is a podcast of Tennessee Voices about mental health, featuring stories of people who have overcome mental health challenges, as well as those who have helped people overcome mental health challenges. This podcast is about authenticity, and it's intended to give a voice to those who are passionate about mental well-being. We hope that by sharing stories, listeners understand mental health and just how important it is in our day-to-day lives, and they will help us reduce stigma. We want you to know that so many who have struggled with mental health can and did overcome their challenges. And if you are struggling, you can too. I'm your host, Ricky Harris, CEO of Tennessee Voices, and with me is my favorite co-host, Will Voss, COO of Tennessee Voices. Welcome to our podcast. Let's get candid.
SPEAKER_00Thank you to our candid sponsors who made this episode possible. The Omni Family of Services is a multi-state human services agency serving adults and children. Through a trauma-competent lens, they provide a continuum of care, including foster care, family preservation, behavioral health, and primary care services, focused on helping kids, families, and the communities they live in strong and healthy. To learn more about the Omni family of services, or to contact an office near you, there's a link provided in this podcast description, along with the contact email if you or your business would like to sponsor an episode of Can Did.
SPEAKER_02Well, here we are. Will 2023.
SPEAKER_032023, we made it. We made it another year.
SPEAKER_02Can you believe it? Can you believe it?
SPEAKER_03No, and I also can't believe we are already one month completed of the year.
SPEAKER_02That's unbelievable. So fast. That the can did podcast had over 1,500 downloads in the last uh year of the episodes we put out last year. So it's big to think about what episodes we want to put out for 2023. And this is the first one.
SPEAKER_03This is the first one. No pressure.
SPEAKER_02No pressure at all. It's February. We made it. Um, so theme of 2023. I've heard it, you've heard it, how to be the best me in 23. I think that's kind of been where our conversations as leaders have been circling not only the best us, but the best everyone that we're influencing, inspiring, and leading. And we as an organization have been walking people through some ways to set intentions and goals. And so that I think is where we're going to land today, kind of spelling out for you what we've done, what we've asked our staff to do, and then what we did ourselves with that information. And I really want to dive in and I want you to tell your story about what your goals are and how it all amounted to one word. But first, like give me a five sentence wrap-up of 2022. What what was your how would you summarize your 2022?
SPEAKER_03How would I summarize 2022? I would say um new experiences, growth, uh, vulnerability in different areas, uh both personal and professional. And I would say another year of uh increasing my faith. Yeah. I want to hear it. Oh yeah, all challenging things, and I I I ended the year grateful and looking forward to what is to come this year. What about you?
SPEAKER_02I um 2022 was was good overall, and um I think from a family standpoint, we crossed milestones for our family in 22. One of which was Clay and I's 20-year anniversary. Whoop, 22 years. I mean, in 2022, we celebrated 20 years. Um one kid started high school. That's a big milestone, and another started middle school. So we all sort of crossed the threshold into new, I guess, uh new times for all of us, new journeys, new experiences and opportunities to grow ourselves. Um, and we leaned in, I think we all leaned in as a family, um, accomplished some really big things, both in my clay and I in our uh professional life. And um, but we've got some big goals for 23. So pretty pumped. I'm I'm pretty excited. I'm ending the year feeling very, very grateful and um leaning into a new stage as a mom, uh kind of changing from the helicopter stage to the coaching stage. So that was hard through 2022. That was one of my most difficult challenges in 22, was just trying to figure out how to adjust to their stage of life um and not be too hovery, too uh worried all the time. So it's been good.
SPEAKER_03It is it's interesting, and I'm not gonna take us down this rabbit hole. It's interesting you say helicopter. Um that that's that's a bit of your parenting style. There's a show. I love I love some reality TV, but I'm a I'm a documentary nerd, but any anything I can really learn from, I love it. But there's a show, I believe it's on Hulu called the Parent Test.
SPEAKER_01Oh, I haven't watched it yet.
SPEAKER_03Yes, it is a bunch of parents, different parents. I think it's 12 total. Okay. Uh they all have different parenting styles, and they are sitting back watching their children uh complete different challenges, and they're giving each other feedback on all right, how did this go based on your parenting style? And it ranges from being child-led, the helicopter parent, the free-range parent to the strict, the high achievement, um, and traditional parenting styles. So I definitely encourage everybody to watch it, be it a parent or not, caregiver. It's it's interesting to see how different uh perspectives are and how that plays into a child's life.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Yeah. I I think that would be a really cool podcast episode to talk about parenting styles because what I think is so fascinating is that there isn't one right path, but that you it the best parenting style is the style who focuses on your child and their specific personality and needs, and and and to parent them, like if you have more than one kid, if you parent them differently, you've probably figured that out.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, it's gonna be interesting. So we're putting putting it out there. Reach out to us if you guys are interested in a parenting, parenting styles podcast. Yeah, but I digress. I digressed. We ended 2022 strong, we ended 2022 grateful.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, absolutely, absolutely. Um, and so we did what we do at Tennessee Voices, and um I led the staff through a challenge to work on goals for 23. And we, in short, do the same thing every year. We look at the four parts of ourself mental, physical, spiritual, social, and we set goals in those four areas and we think about things that are um not easily achieved. At least that's my advice. If I can write it down and get it done by next week, it shouldn't be a 2023 goal. These are things that I challenge the staff to stretch themselves, to reach for something that they really, really want that's been hard for them to get on their own. And then um, you know, enjoy the fruit of the labor and enjoy the opportunity at the end of the year to go, man, I could have never done that on my own. That was that was an uh an effort of the people around me. Uh, if they're spiritually led, that's an effort of my my faith. And um to really appreciate how much more exciting it is to accomplish a goal that's big and not to be um also not to like stress yourself out. So there's balance.
SPEAKER_03Gotta have balance, gotta have a balance.
SPEAKER_02Gotta have balance. But then, but then I ask them to look across the goals that they have set in all those areas and look for themes, look for things that jump out at them in all the areas that they start to see, like, oh wow, my mind is really swirling around accomplishing this thing. Um, and and so to label, like label those things. So if you if you look across your goals and you see themes, pick a word that represents all of those goals because they fall within this theme. And that we spend some time on. We spent the whole month of January with our staff. And Will, you took this further with your individual staff that you lead and ask them to really, you know, I make it an option, right? I I send it out to the staff and say, this is what I'm doing. And I invite you on this journey with me. And it's always so fun to get feedback and emails from staff who are on the journey and they're telling me what they're choosing. You leaned in really hard to this this year and laid an expectation for your staff to do this work. You want to talk a little bit about why that was important to you and what you think it'll accomplish for your staff?
SPEAKER_03Yes, I know this was uh I found it fun, you know, uh for me. And it's not something that I wanted to uh impose on people, but I wanted to challenge them as we are looking how do we lead from the top down and all the way down back up to the top? How is it that we can be consistent in our messaging and how we're leading one another? You know, we talk with staff often that, all right, everybody in this agency is a leader in one way, shape, or another. And so what I wanted to do was challenge my team. All right, pick that word and how does it relate in those four areas? And mine, you know, it's it's only one area that's a little different. I go physical, mental, spiritual, and emotional to the social. And I I chose hunger for the year. And what I wanted to do was meet with those other leaders. And you always tell us that other leaders create other leaders. Well, what is it that we're focused on this year and how are we communicating that with other staff? And I thought that that was very important that we do at each level. So we've been pushing it down, and I would say that whole agency has really been receptive to it, majority. And some have struggled with trying to figure out what is that exact word. And I've also given them the time and space to say, you know what? It can even be a phrase. Whatever is fitting for you as you're continuing to grow. And this is a part of that self-care journey and also a part of that leadership growth that people are looking for.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. And and you're right, this is their work. So make it their work. If a word doesn't fit, it's a phrase, but it's not, this is not a rule. This is this is just an invitation to take this wherever they want it to go.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Okay, we have to debate something though.
SPEAKER_03Let's let's debate.
SPEAKER_02When you set your goals, what is different? What's the difference between your mental and emotional goals?
SPEAKER_03Yeah. So for me, and let's turn into a whole therapy session. Um I've always looked at it as all right, my mental piece is the all right, what am I thinking about? What am I focus on? Um, as it relates to the word that I've chosen, it's all right, what am I feeding my mind? What am I focusing on? What am I what am I listening to? What am I engaging in? Um, and then the emotional piece is the the feelings. Um how am I feeling about this? Uh, how is it affecting my day-to-day mood? Things of that nature. I've always just separated those because of how big of a, I guess how big of a weight they do play in my life. Um yeah.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, that's that's really cool. I I I've got to also take a quick rabbit trail. I met a woman the other day, and this this was just I just found it interesting. Um, she I was reading her information about her business. She started a business called Like a Virgin Mocktails, local here in Hendersonville. And um, or Nashville. And she was I was reading her story and her business grew out of some goals that she had for herself. She said she was spending a lot of her social time drinking, and it led to just things she didn't feel good about, whether it was, you know, affecting her physically or her choices, I don't know for sure, but just led her to a place where she was convicted that, you know, I'm not, this isn't my best self. I'm having fun. I'm getting social, like check the box. But it's harming other areas of my self-care that I don't, I don't appreciate. So, but she but she didn't want to give up the social aspect that she got from drinking because she enjoyed being with her friends and having fun and new experiences and all those kinds of things. So she created this business where she sets up pop-up mocktail shops. And um, I just thought, you know, what a cool way to look at your goals for yourself and go, there's something about this I don't want to give up, but then there's parts of it that I really do want to give up. And how can I, how can I figure this out? And I was like, that that's awesome.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, I look at that and like, wow, there's so much that that's so much we can dive into with it.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_03But hopefully it's encouraging someone that's listening. Like, you know what? I can turn this thing that may be having a negative effect on my life into something that's positive and can have an impact on other people.
SPEAKER_02And to that point, I had the I had the personal experience. Like you were describing, you have a goal related around emotional health and really leaning into understanding your feelings and your emotions and how you use those. I um I'm more of a person who would like to avoid feelings and emotions and don't often, it's not natural for me to lean into those, but rather just to avoid them completely because they're uncomfortable or when they're uncomfortable. And uh I was challenged to lean into some of that. So I have appreciation for the fact that you have a separate goal that really focuses on this. Uh, my coach last year, my leadership coach challenged me to lean into some of the negative feelings that I experience. And in my, I don't know if it's my personality, my the way I've been taught in the world, but Southern culture, I don't know, be happy, be warm, don't put people off. Uh, don't use any kind of any way, shape, or form, let people think that you are rude or angry or uh whatever. And so it just put the light on negative emotions like anger for me that those shouldn't be, I shouldn't feel anger because that's a negative, bad thing and it makes me look bad and it's bad for me. You know, that that was what I told myself from I guess just culture. Um and she really challenged me to lean in and understand the purpose of anger or how it could serve me. And I especially couldn't make that leap in leadership. Like I've never had a professional experience where I expressed anger in the workplace ever. That's just not been like professionally, that it was always very taboo for me. And also as a woman, I didn't want people to label me in a certain way if I were to appear angry or to appear even, you know, upset for any reason. So she challenged me to kind of learn to process it, not express it maybe to others, but to process it and understand it and see how it serves me and how it might serve my leadership decisions. And that was a really cool process. Have you experienced anything like that?
SPEAKER_03So I guess for me, uh yes, in some aspects. Um, you you and it's it goes back to upbringing, you know, we we can throw it out there and it's no no negative connotation or saying, hey, mom, dad, you did something wrong. It's a bit of all right, traditional, hey, let's make sure this is how we're presenting. And also I'm gonna even go a little deeper and say the the spiritual aspect of it too. Yeah, you've got too much to be thankful for and grateful for to be upset about these things.
SPEAKER_02Absolutely. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Well, there is a space for both of those things to fit. Um, and I know for me, I try my best not to do it at work. And I I I try to compartmentalize and all right, anything that's going on outside of work, leave it at the door. Once I get to work, how are you presenting? Um I know for me it's always gone to the all right, I want to be the person that's liked. I don't want people to be upset with me and piss anybody off. Yeah. Um, but then as I'm continuing to to uh I'm continuing to get older and learn more about life, well, you're not gonna be able to please everybody. And that's one of the things I've struggled with the most. I'm definitely a people pleaser, uh, but also recognize that, well, I've got to get my needs met as well. And then when you put that in the perspective professional aspect, we've got to meet the needs of this this company, the needs of the grants, the needs of the goals. And you have to go in and have those difficult conversations where all right, the decision has to be made and one person may leave not liking it.
SPEAKER_01We'll be right back after this short break. TN Voices is now hiring qualified applicants to fill positions all across the state. You can be part of a growing team that puts the mental health of Tennesseans first and thrive in a compassionate work environment. To apply to join our team, log on to tnvoices.org slash employment. Welcome back.
SPEAKER_03So it's a tough place to be, but when you start recognizing, you know, we say I think we've said it in employment podcasts, it's bigger than us. Once we start recognizing that, um, and it's it's interesting you brought this up as well because there's a quote that I read recently. I can't remember who said it, but it was just a lot of issues that people have with you is due to their internal struggles that they're having with themselves. And it just makes me wonder, you know what? Are we taking the time to say what's going on, what's wrong, and allowing people to know they can't talk about it with us.
SPEAKER_02That's yeah, that's true. I I thought about a few years ago when I started to kind of wrestle with this. Um I was a I'm a recovering people pleaser and recovering perfectionist for sure.
SPEAKER_03And um the tips on how to how to recover age and wisdom.
SPEAKER_02I don't know. No, oh no, that's not true. I I'm being funny, but I did do a lot of work on that. I did. And um what I realized is I looked at people who were like me who really aimed to please and and make everyone happy. And there's a difference between diplomacy and confusion. And I I think people who just aim to keep people happy and want people to like them can create confusion because we become unclear as leaders in our expectations, we become unclear in our hopes and goals and visions, and we become swayed by other opinions. And so I really had to see that uh uh out of someone else to recognize that that wasn't going to serve me well because I experienced the frustration and confusion of being in this person's presence and they had authority and they wouldn't ever um claim their truth, their their opinion, their. Thoughts and I was desperate to hear their thoughts because of their authority that they had. And so I realized how much confusion it created. And I decided I would pursue diplomacy, but still be strong in my conviction. And so, you know, being diplomatic is different than just being gullible or being um focused on making people happy or being a people pleaser. And so you're right. I mean, learning to handle situations differently and to care about people in the process, but to still say no or to still be clear on what you think is right and to lead with conviction. And I've had times I've had to do that in Tennessee Voices when great ideas are surfaced and they're great ideas. But in my gut, they're not, they're not for Tennessee voices. And I know that. And I have to figure out how to say that without crushing someone's thoughts and ideas because it doesn't mean they're bad.
SPEAKER_03Yep.
SPEAKER_02It's tough.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. And it and for me, I'll say it goes a little into we tell people, all right, it's okay to not be okay. We've got to remember that for ourselves too. It's okay. It is okay.
SPEAKER_02Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yep. I had my coach one time made me speak to my anger. It was the weirdest thing I've ever heard. Um, but she played the role of my anger and she started talking to me, and as uncomfortable as I was, I I just had to lean in and go for it. And it it ended up being a really helpful exercise once I got past myself and just let it go and and you know, let her do what she was doing, which was helpful. But I've started to do that on my own without her, where you know, gosh, I feel I feel like really angry right now. And I don't know why this is bothering me so bad because I'm really inclined to not be bothered by this. I want to let this go. I don't want this to be an issue for me. And I I've learned that I do a lot of like like the rugs, they're full because I've sweat so much stuff under them. So yeah.
SPEAKER_03Do you know what? That's the that's the human aspect of things. We have to recognize our we have to face it. We have to face it. That reminded me a lot about empty chair. I used to do that sometimes with uh with kids during therapy sessions, and they're like, this is weird, but as they start talking to what what what the issue is, it it's helpful. I've even done it myself from time to time.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Because you've got to get that out and begin to understand, all right, what is the core of it? What's the core issue?
SPEAKER_02Yeah. I think the most wise people recognize their emotion quickly and then process it in a healthy way. I think those who ignore it and sweep it and think it's gonna go away because you ignored it never works, right? We all we all know that.
SPEAKER_03Oh, yeah, and I had to learn that the hard way.
SPEAKER_02That's terrible. And somehow I feel like there's a story there that you don't want to tell.
SPEAKER_03So but I but I just let let people that are listening, you are not alone.
SPEAKER_02You are not alone. You are not. This is the most human human thing to do. Well, okay, so I want to hear more about hunger. I want to hear more about what your whatever goals you're willing to share, what what those look like, both professionally, personally, whatever you want to dive into there.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. So the word I chose it was hunger. Uh it was driven uh out of a fast that we did at my church. Um, I'll tell you guys, this is gonna be shocking, but a lot of days I was hungry during this 28-day fast. There was no no um fried foods, no meat until after four, uh, no sweets. And then I'd added no alcohol as well. Um did you draw January? Well, almost close to it because it was a 21-day fast.
SPEAKER_02Good for you.
SPEAKER_03And as we chose as as the task came to us or the challenge about picking a word, that's the that's the main one that kept coming to mind. And I think about, you know, how can I challenge myself with this? What can this look like? Is this going to be a quick goal? And I broke it into those four areas. So spiritually, for me, um, I I kept going back to scripture. All right, man, can't live off of bread alone. I quoted it so much during those days where I drove past Chick-fil-A and I'm looking at the clock, waiting until four o'clock, like, yes, I can have meat finally. Um, but until Panda Express. Oh, Panda Express, yes, I know. If I could, yeah. Um it but it just made me recognize all right, I'm quoting scripture to fill me up. Uh and how am I feeding myself? How am I feeding myself spiritually? How am I really diving into it? And yes, I've talked about, you know, I read the daily, daily uh verse every morning, no matter what day it is. I try to make sure that's the first thing I do. Well, can I go ahead and click the verse and start looking into the chapter as well? Start getting a better understanding. I mean, my pastor has always talked about, yes, we know these scriptures, we know these verses, but do we know what comes before that one and after? Do we begin to understand the story? So it's something that I'm gonna be challenging myself with in the spiritual aspect mentally, like going back to what I stated earlier around what am I feeding my mind, what am I focused on? Um, and really making sure I've got some organized thoughts. There's a lot of strategic thinking and planning that goes into both personal and professional life. So, all right, am I making sure that mentally I'm well? Am I taking care of myself? Am I doing those check-ins? Am I accessing the My Health Coach app to take an assessment to check in and make sure I'm doing okay? Um, we want to pour into everyone else, but all right, who's pouring into us? And then are we sitting back waiting on someone to pour into us when we actually can pour back into ourselves? Um, emotionally, hunger as far as those hangry days. Um, I've been there and I recognize I I've got to eat, gotta eat something, and I'm upset about this. I'm emoting these different things. Well, am I being aware of how I'm presenting both in person and also via email? So to everyone that is listening, nonverbal communication, make sure you're aware of it. People can pick up on it. Um, so just being aware of that and then physically beginning to eat better. I love fried foods. I can eat chocolate from 8 o'clock a.m. to midnight, but that's not the best thing for me. Uh, I've got to be aware of that. Ifortunately I am getting older and I don't want all that to catch up to me sooner or before it needs really needs to. And then that a lot of that is the personal aspect, and then professionally hungry as far as what I learned more. How am I really diving into understanding more and the the contract piece that a lot of people are like, oh, this is boring. Well, this is also the contract piece that's it's important to know, or it's important to make sure we're clear on it, compliance-wise, um, and then assessing my team's hunger. Who's hungry for more? Who do I need to feed? And whose plates are already full. How can I make sure that they have the tips and tools that they need to be successful in their role? And something that I've been talking with each one of them about, I'm also assessing their diet. There are certain things, there are certain things people can't be fed.
SPEAKER_04Now that's important diet.
SPEAKER_03Uh-huh. You got it. You got it. So you've got to be aware of all right, what is it that people are wanting to eat? What can they eat? Um, how we're feeding them, and who's hungry, who's hungry for more. And it's okay when people say, All right, I'm full. All right.
SPEAKER_02I love it.
SPEAKER_03So hung hunger is gonna be my word for the year.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, that's awesome. That is awesome. Well, I know that your staff will benefit from your effort to guide and to um help them journey on this path to a better me in 23. Um I I'm really excited for Tennessee Voices. I feel like, and look, this is a little skewed because we have more staff this year than we've ever had, but I feel like more people have fully embraced this journey than they ever have before. Yes. I do think it's taken the years we've put in on educating them about self-care and how important it is and how it impacts them because of the work they do. When they're doing this kind of work, it is so draining. And we don't even recognize, sometimes or realize how draining it is. And honestly, you call them heroes. These people are heroes, they're carrying other people's burdens to make their load lighter so that they can the people they're serving can just manage through the next day, the next week, the next month. And, you know, that's that's a lot because we all carry our own. And so they're throwing extra baggage on their back out of love and out of commitment and compassion. And I believe they understand now what self-care really is, and not that it's just setting aside time for themselves to go get a massage or whatever. You know, the those like those little basic layers, uh, those commercial layers I will, I will say, of self-care, where you see the quick commercial 15 seconds and you know, the bath bomb, bath bomb, self-care. Um, they're getting a deep understanding. They're understanding at their core that I'm better not only as an employee, not only as a therapist or a family support specialist or a care coordinator for other people, as a sister, brother, mom, dad, friend, um, all of the things. So I'm loving it. I'm enjoying this so much this year. I definitely don't feel like I'm doing it alone because I've had so many people reach out to me and share what they're trying to accomplish and how hard it is. Just some of the things I've recommended, a practice of silence, three minutes of silence. And I've had people say, like, why is this so hard? Well, our brains are not trained anymore to be sit with silence, to just sit with silence. We are uh unfortunately wired to be moving nonstop, to be thinking nonstop, to be I all I don't, I don't even know anymore. It's so many, so many competing priorities, compete, competing things for our attention. Um but I will say for me, it is a year of my word is investment. And that went across all like that the theme of investment goes through all layers of my goals. I have invested a lot, starting spiritually, because that's kind of the priority for me. So invested a lot in volunteering at my church, being part of what's happening with the student ministry. I just really have a huge heart for children and students, and I believe in giving back to the generation coming because they're going to be taking care of us pretty soon. They're going to be making decisions and influencing the world in a way that will impact us. And so just really thinking about how I can dive deeper into that. Um, I have invested in spending time with one of my neighbors who is older than me and has she's full of godly wisdom. And we just, you know, every month or so we we've started having coffee at her kitchen table. And she's recommended some some really cool things, but there's a book out there uh that she recommended 40 prayers for my husband. There's also a book, 40 prayers for my wife. So if you want to do it the other way, um it's so it's been so cool to be intentional about praying for my spouse. I do that for my kids. And I think in, you know, like a not I don't mean to way, but I I think we all kind of go like, oh, well, they're my spouse has grown, they're adult, they got this, they will take care of themselves spiritually. I'm gonna focus on these children. Um, but to really stop and go back and and say, like, no, no, no, how can how can I be a support and encouragement and actually pray for you daily? It's just been really cool. I've enjoyed it the first month of this year. So that's an investment on my part to take time and do that and to spend the time. Um, which sounds, sorry, Clay, if you're listening, which sounds terrible. Like how are you not already praying for your husband every day? But I think we just cut we kind of get in a groove, like he's good.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, good, you know.
SPEAKER_02Um, he's not a needy person, he doesn't have lots of struggles, and so um that doesn't mean he still doesn't need prayer. Um, so that's cool. Physical, I you know, I I'm always deep into new wellness ideas. So sauna is my new commitment. I'm doing uh trying to do sauna at least two or three times a week.
SPEAKER_03Wow, okay.
SPEAKER_02Who knows where it's gonna take me on my physical health journey? From everything I've read, Will, I believe it's gonna make me healthier and I just won't know it till I'm older and I don't have you know problems that maybe I would have had. And for that, I will never know. I'm just believing. I'm just believing in this idea. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Faith and hope at its finest right there.
SPEAKER_02Is easy in the winter. I'll tell you that. I've been enjoying it when it's really, really cold. We're gonna see how July goes, August.
SPEAKER_03We'll check on you by then.
SPEAKER_02See if I'm still two to three times a week. Uh definitely from a social perspective, I have got to take an actual vacation. It has just been like I don't know, it's time to do something really fun. So um the goal is to go to Hawaii this year. Let me tell you why. From my family's perspective, you know, they can't wait. It's awesome. They've heard only good things about Hawaii. My husband's been there. He's like, he he can't even stop talking about how awesome it is. I've never been. I've never been for one reason, and that's because I'm scared to fly. I do fly, I fly for work, uh not often, but when I do, hour and a half, two hours max. Um, did go to Colorado with the family a year or two ago. Two and a half hours. Not too bad. I made it. I did it. This is flying over the water for six hours.
SPEAKER_04Yes.
SPEAKER_02This is not, this is I have avoided this my whole life because I don't want I I especially don't want to fly over the water, which my husband and everybody else tell me, do you understand it would be better to land in the water than on land?
SPEAKER_04That is correct.
SPEAKER_02You went down. I do not understand this because I feel like I would immediately be sucked to the bottom of the ocean and there would be my death.
SPEAKER_03So is that how it happened? We did not want that.
SPEAKER_02Well, not every pilot is Sully, okay? So I'm gonna do I committed to my family. Literally, my kids sat at the table and said, Mom, can you please let us go somewhere fun that takes longer than an hour and a half to get to? And like we really want an awesome experience.
SPEAKER_03Well, I have never been, but I can tell you it from what I know, from what I hear, it is gonna be beautiful by the time you get over there.
SPEAKER_02Man.
SPEAKER_03So buckle up, buckle up, take a nap.
SPEAKER_02And everybody else, you know, oh, just take some medication. Look, I'm not doing that. People don't understand this other thing about me is I hate medication, not because I don't believe in it, not because I I think it's bad. Just I have this. I personally have whatever side effect any medication has listed. I have it. That's me. I'm the one. And so I'm so scared of everything under the sun because I've taken things and got had reactions and you know, had horrible things happen. So I'm I'm like, nope, I gotta do this. Unmedicated, yes, ripping those the arms of the chairs. I'm gonna do this.
SPEAKER_03It's it's funny that you say that. I I'm I'm for those that are listening that don't know, I'm a bit of an old soul. I love old school TV. It just reminds me of the A team, uh, Mr. T, very tough guy. He hated flying, he hated flying, and he had to be put to sleep every time he took that flight. So you could you can do it, okay? You can do it.
SPEAKER_02Okay, but in the words of the uh of the uh amazing Mr. T, he probably feels sorry for me and he might say I pitied the fool. So anyway, um wow, that was good. So those are just some highlights of I'm investing in myself, I'm investing in my family, I'm investing in a vacation that I really want, but I'm not gonna let fear hold me down. And um, for my staff, I am investing in their well-being. I have been 100% sure that helping them understand how to take care of themselves is better than me and you trying to take care of them. Because we don't know what's best for them, but they intuitively do. And so I'm super excited to see them lean in because I know that that makes all of us better. And if they are willing to dive in and do the work and see for themselves what their own needs are and can tell us what they are, we'll be a better organization.
SPEAKER_03Big time. I'm excited about it. I'm excited. This is gonna be a good year for another growth year.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Yes. And so stay tuned. We're gonna invite some amazing guests this year. We're gonna get this podcast machine cranked back up. And um I'm I'm I'm excited about what is possible in 23. I'm excited about taking people along the journey with us. And if you are listening and you're thinking you might remotely be interested in doing this work, the the steps are simple. Jot down four major categories or five, if you want to use emotional and mental as two separate categories: spiritual, physical, mental slash emotional, and social. And if you're a leader, throw in the category of leadership and jot down for yourself in each of those categories some big things you want to accomplish, like overcoming flying over the water for five hours. And in those areas, look through what you've written down, spend a couple of days thinking about it and ask yourself like, what is the theme of my goals? What what what am I trying to accomplish here? Overarching. Give yourself a word like we did, hunger and investment, and then put that word somewhere where you see it daily. Mine is on a sticky note on the bottom of my computer monitor. It will remind you daily to stay focused on that goal, on those goals. When I um thinking about handling a conversation one way, I glance to my right and under my monitor it says investment, and I decide how how do I handle this conversation in a way that invests in the person on the other side of the conversation. Um, and so I've used it so many times to shift my thinking, my focus, and stay committed to the goal. Any other tips, Will, for our listeners before we wrap up this first podcast episode of 23?
SPEAKER_03I I think uh my biggest tips would be challenge yourself, dream big, dream realistic, and recognize that it can happen, it won't happen overnight. Um, it's this activity I definitely encourage everyone to do. And I also just remind everybody that hey those goals can be adjusted throughout the year. This isn't a all right, I'll never hit this, or maybe it's a different timeline that we put it on. Maybe there are different steps that we've got to take to get there, but it can't, it can be achieved. So really be hopeful.
SPEAKER_02Be hopeful. And I'm gonna leave one last meaningful tip. I've done this for a few years, so I have several words from the past year. When you end your year, commemorate that word if you if you felt like you really accomplished those goals, commemorate that word in some way. Um, I had mine stamped into a little bracelet one year. Uh there's lots of awesome ideas, right? Just commemorate that word and celebrate your accomplishments and know that it wasn't done alone. So make sure you tell people in your in your bubble about those accomplishments and thank them for being part of your journey. All right, y'all. Have an awesome month. I hope to uh be back in front of you with amazing guests in the next few months ahead.
SPEAKER_01Thank you for joining us. If you enjoyed today's program, like, subscribe, and review this podcast. If you or someone you know is in need of mental health support services, log on to Tnvoices.org or call 1-800-670 9882. Join us next time as we get candid.