My Thick Accent

Friendship, Food & Firsts: A Newcomer’s Journey | Beneath The Accent with Muzhda Akbari

• Gurasis Singh • Season 2

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What happens when a missing taxi and a faulty internet connection lead to unexpected kindness and delicious pizza? Hear how my first day in Montreal turned from chaos to charm, thanks to the generosity of strangers like Beer Inder and Harpreet. I reflect on the warm welcome I received and the surprising ways these encounters helped me find my footing in a new country. 

Together with my guest, we dive into cultural surprises in Canada, from the classroom revelations to the joy of celebrating diverse festivals. We explore the nuances of adjusting to a new life in Canada, including trying poutine for the first time and dreaming of owning countless cats.

Throughout our conversation, we express gratitude for the insights shared and the connections made, leaving you with a deeper understanding of the immigrant experience and a sense of shared humanity.

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Gurasis:

so much that, before we get into the final segment, I have introduced this new segment in the second season of the podcast and I call it know your host, where I give my guests an opportunity to ask me any questions you might have yeah, I would like to ask you a question so what was the your favorite?

Muzhda:

like what was your first day in Canada? Like what was your experience in Canada? Like when you first came here?

Gurasis:

wow, I was waiting for somebody to ask me this question, because I have asked this question to all my guests and I do have an answer to that. I have a really long answer, but I'll try to shorten it up and I'll share that with you. Um, the short answer is it was terrifying, it was hard, okay, so okay, I'll tell you briefly. So, when I landed, a taxi was supposed to come and pick me up at 8 pm, 8.30 pm, and I was supposed to go to like a distant, random person I found on Facebook Messenger, who was very sweet and who said sure, you can come and stay with us for the initial days and by the time you find your house, you know, I was like sure. So I packed my bags, I landed here at 8, 30 pm and when I checked, like, my taxi is not coming, which was supposed to come, which was? Which was a taxi given to us by school or something was there which I don't exactly remember now, and that taxi was supposed to come and pick me up. That didn't show up and I was like man, how am I supposed to go anywhere? And even my internet is not connecting for some reason. I don't I even if I want to order an uber. It has to be like through credit card and everything. So how am I supposed to do all that? No, you were just. You have like so many other things going on in your mind when you just land. Um.

Gurasis:

So I called those that person whom I was supposed to go to the house to. I called him on messenger and somehow my internet connected and I called him and he said oh, I don't live that far, so I'll come and pick you up. So he was so sweet that his name was peter and I mean shout out to you amazing person, amazing human being. I'm still in touch with her. It's been six years and he came and he picked me up, along with his friend, and then he took me to his house and I remember their house was on the fourth floor of the building, so you can imagine a lot of stairs, and I had three big 23 kgs bags. They were not 23 kgshta, I can assure you. I was trying to pack my life in those three suitcases. They were not 23 kgs, they were at least like 25 each or maybe more than that, and one of them was even close to 30. I remember I paid extra for that when I landed here, that his actual guy whom I connected with, he went to his work and his friend was there to welcome me to the house. His friend helped me to carry those three big bags to fourth floor and he was so nice and he helped me do all those. And that was tiring and when I was, I remember moving my bags upstairs and I was like, okay, this is Canada, welcome to Canada, this is where your struggle starts.

Gurasis:

And yes, that was my first night, so to say. And what happened the next day? I think I'll keep it for another episode, for sure. But yes, that was my first night and I remember when I reached the place, you know, when I moved everything upstairs and that guy was very nice. He ordered a pizza for me, you know, and he so that was also the first time I got to know that you can order a pizza which can be half vegetarian and half non-vegetarian. I didn't know that you could do that, and because he didn't eat non-veg, non-vegetarian, and he ordered a pizza which was like half veg, half non-vegetarian, I was like, oh, you can do that, I didn't know about that. So he ordered a pizza for me and along with that he served me juice and his name was Heartbreed, I remember. So yeah, amazing people, I came across on my very first night and I, I came across on my very first night and I can't be more grateful for that.

Muzhda:

And yes, so that was my first day, first night in Montreal, canada. Yeah, that's good. So you went to first to Montreal and then came here so I am, I'm still in Montreal.

Gurasis:

I landed here in Montreal and when I met you in toronto, I was just visiting, uh, toronto for like 10 days or so.

Muzhda:

Yeah oh, that's great. Montreal is such a beautiful city I just went there once indeed it is.

Gurasis:

It is very beautiful, a lot, of, lots of things to do, a very exciting place for sure, yeah, okay, well, thank you. Thank you for that question, loved it. So now we're in the final segment of the podcast. I call it beneath the accent because we are knowing each other beneath the accent. I'm going to ask a couple of questions. You can answer them in one word or a sentence, or how. So you feel like the idea is just to know more about mushta, so ready yeah, of course so what advice would you give to mushta, who is in the initial months of landing in canada?

Muzhda:

don't go outside that much because I got sick okay, okay.

Gurasis:

Describe a moment when you experienced like a significant cultural shock in our school.

Muzhda:

I was in first day of school. My sister and I we were. I was so prepared and serious like I took my notebook, my pen and I was staring at my teacher. And then the teacher said okay, do your work. And then one one of my classmates is playing video game, the other one is watching movie okay and the other one is, oh my god, talking very badly.

Muzhda:

I was like, oh my god, what the teacher is here, why you're talking like that, but then I realized that it's just normal. Then even one student was sleeping and then I said, oh, this is the class wow, what kind of classroom was that? That's crazy, crazy it was physics class okay, okay.

Gurasis:

What's that one dish from your home country that always brings you comfort and nostalgia?

Muzhda:

it is mantu. Oh, I love mantu. I even love the name of it. It's like mantu. When you break it down, it's mean me and you oh, okay then it is a dish. So it is like oh my gosh, such a delicious dish. We we cook it, like not often, but like sometimes we cook it and I love it what?

Gurasis:

what is it?

Muzhda:

tell me more about that yeah, it is uh kind of like. It has uh meat onion, some spices, and it is. It has the shape of dumpling, like the chinese dumpling, but it's like quite different. It's like not similar, it's quite different. When we cook it like all together, especially when my mom cook it, it is the most delicious one. I just love it awesome, sounds great.

Gurasis:

Is it that available in canada? Do you think I can buy and try okay?

Muzhda:

exactly like whenever you saw a afghani restaurant. Like, just ask them like a month or month, yeah, month two. They will like they will probably have it for sure, okay, perfect.

Gurasis:

Are there any funny story related to misunderstanding around the accent or English that you have?

Muzhda:

Around English, I think yeah. So most of the time like I mix up the words, like I mix up a lot of like the words when it comes to the school, like when I talk, I keep like different words.

Muzhda:

And then there was like very funny experience with me is that my best friend, so she is afghan, so we always talk persian together, like we always talk like farsi. Then sometimes I'm in a classroom and then my canadian classmate or my indian or pakistani classmates are with me and I'm just talking with them and then they say like what, what are you doing? And then I realize that I'm speaking farsi with them and they said, like what are you speaking? Sometimes even with the teacher, like I'm talking with the teacher, and the teacher is like are you okay? And then I realized that I just spoke farsi with the teacher because, like I'm so much exposed with my best friends and we talk in farsi a lot, I mess up like the whole language yeah, so it's a lot of forgetting words, uh, in this like moment no, I can relate to that.

Gurasis:

I remember initially, in my initial year, my translator would just completely stop my my brain would stop. I wanted to say something and I would end up speaking in punjabi and they were like what, what do you? What do you mean by that? And I'm like, okay, give me a moment, I'll get back to you. I don't know exactly. Yeah, okay, so what's your favorite cultural festival or celebration in Canada?

Muzhda:

in Canada. Oh, in Canada, I think I never been to any like big culture program till now, but there are some like. In mississauga we have celebration center. Sometimes there's like a lot of like cultural programs. They have like food. There was one time I went there was like international food festival where countries, different countries, was bringing their own food, and I'm a big fan of food, so that was like my favorite and I love the fact that how diverse canada is, so when I was there I could find food from all over the world, so I literally tried food from all the way india to china perfect experience okay, share a quick tip for fellow immigrants who are trying to adjust to a new country yeah, I think sometimes we tend to think, okay, I'm just going to learn everything by myself.

Muzhda:

I think this is kind of illusion. We should not be like. Yeah, I think, asking questions, trying to talk with friends, ask, just simply ask the question what are your advice for a new immigrant?

Gurasis:

what are?

Muzhda:

your advice for a new immigrant? What are your advice for a new refugee? I think asking these questions will help you so much. The fact that sometimes you know, even myself I find myself not asking and then spending two weeks trying to find a way for something. But if I ask someone it will just solve in one hour. So why not ask? So I think my best tip would be like always ask questions and don't be afraid to ask questions.

Gurasis:

Love that. Yeah, absolutely. Tell us about your first friend that you made in Canada and where did you meet them?

Muzhda:

Yeah, my first friend, okay, I think the first friend I met here was also Afghan. No, no, no, no. Afghan, yeah, actually, I have a very also Afghan. No, no, no, no. Afghan, no, yeah, actually. Yeah, I have a very good story. Sure, the first friend I met was an Afghan refugee in Tander Bay. She was also from Badakhshan and we kind of got very close.

Muzhda:

What happened was my family we are a big family, like we have a big family members, like we are five, like seven people, and then our room, Like seven people, and then our room. We had like two rooms but we used to gather all in one room, we used to come together, and then there was a lot of noise. My little sister and brother, like there was so much noise and everything. So what happens is I met this friend and she said you know what? I am all by myself, I'm alone. Why you do not join me in my room? And then it's an amazing idea.

Muzhda:

And then I spent that three months in tanderby with her. I used to sleep in her room and she was amazing chef. She used to cook so delicious food, and then I was having the best time, I was having the best food. We used to watch movies together, we used to go explore the city like. So I think the first, my first friend was her name was mushteri that I met her in tander bay and ever since that we are even friends. I was um part of the mu in in toronto I the cost of the house the hotel was 200 but because I knew my friend I went to her room. She has her roommates but just because of that friend I went to her room and she had been super helpful like a sister for me.

Gurasis:

Wow, love that, love the story. What's something that you ate for the first time in Canada?

Muzhda:

yeah, I tried poutine. Oh, that was like, yeah, when I came here I started to search okay, what are the most famous foods in Canada? And then it start like poutine and some other food. So there was two canadian women in tander bed. They said, okay, let's take you to uh, try poutine. And I was expecting a very like different food, a canadian food, but I just found that it's just fries and cheese, which I said, okay, okay, you didn't try anyi food.

Gurasis:

Ours definitely. I would say you know our Indian, even Afghan. You know our brown food, so to say, is really good. It's full of flavor and good. You know it's quite different.

Muzhda:

It's just like fries yeah.

Gurasis:

Okay. If you had to describe yourself as any creature, animal or a bird, what would it be and why Okay?

Muzhda:

I love this question. My my favorite animal is cat and I love cats and. I think I would definitely be a cat and I think, if there's, like there's one theory that we say, okay, in the previous life I was some animal, I think I was a cat, I was a cat and I will be a cat. I love cats okay.

Gurasis:

Do you own a cat right now or no?

Muzhda:

oh, I have been insisting my mom that I want a cat but she says no, no, no, because I have one little sister. And my mom said you already have one cat and we don't need anyone. But definitely, whenever I have a chance to be with myself, I will get not one cat but 10 cats.

Gurasis:

Okay, these are like classic answers from our parents. You know we already have a dog, have you why we need a dog? We already have you why we need a cat. So it's like classic answers from our parents. Yeah, yeah, okay, okay. So, mushta, if you could have one superpower, what would it be?

Muzhda:

wow, I love this question too. I think superpowers I love the superpower of being in this no, no, no, not invisible. I wanted to have one invisible friend, okay, one creator, maybe, like just one invisible friend, who would be so like intelligent, so smart, and then that invisible friend would help me in everything. Because, like I wanted to have one, like I used to watch movies and I thought, maybe, like there are some invisible creatures even in the world and I was even one time trying to connect with one, which is very scary.

Muzhda:

Yeah, like, do you know that they really say like there are creatures that we can see, like ghosts, and okay I was thinking, if I connect with one and that ghost would help me with my exams, they would take the exam papers and everything. But no, that's a bad idea. But I wish I there was like an opportunity like that to have one invisible friend who can do everything, and then can I help you okay, don't, don't try that ghost thing again.

Gurasis:

I don't, I would not recommend that. Okay, if you had to create this one law that everyone has to follow, what would it be?

Muzhda:

I think everyone should own their own businesses, like just everyone doing what they want to do and not trying to sneak out on other people's like life in a way that it is not like comfortable, Because even in this world right now we can see that people are just OK with giving opinion and I think it is not OK to just give opinion.

Muzhda:

I think freedom and democracy does not mean that you should be so much okay to get into other people's rules, beliefs, because we're just different. Like you know, people come from different culture and if you are expressing your culture in any way, either it is dressing in a different way, either it is speaking in a different way. I think no one should be allowed to like stop you. So I think that one rule would be respecting everything. Everyone, and just everyone, should own their own businesses yeah, perfect, love the answer.

Gurasis:

Okay, so much that the home is where the heart is, you know, and if you had to choose one thing that makes you feel most home in canada, what would it be?

Muzhda:

uh, I love like poetry sometimes. No, no, afghani music, afghani music, yeah, I think whenever I play Afghani music, they just like bring me back home.

Gurasis:

And.

Muzhda:

I don't know. Like that's a great feeling and also I have. I want to show it here, it's just in my table so I have this kind of like carpet like little carpet. Yeah, I got this from Afghanistan, so it is like a piece of home. I have it like in my room.

Gurasis:

Loved it.

Muzhda:

So it's kind of always when I see it, it's like giving me that vibe of my country. I love culture. So I love like carpets, so it's kind of give me home.

Gurasis:

Amazing, yeah, okay, so describe Canada in one word.

Muzhda:

What a sentence peaceful, I think peaceful, yeah. I love the fact that, how people are living in harmony, the fact that we knew when I was in a country like afghanistan I thought like, let's say, christians or muslims would never live in a classroom together or live in a place together. But when you come here and then like in our school, in one class, like I have a classmate who is jew, I have a classmate who is, like, for example, hindu yeah, I have a classmate who is muslim.

Muzhda:

Like all people together, like different skin colors, different cultures, and everyone is okay, like this. This teaches something that you know like all the politics how politics can be scary that you know people are trying to stop us to be together, but when you go in a classroom you see people don't have any problem. Like people are just people. So I think I love the harmony and peace in here absolutely can't agree more.

Gurasis:

So if you could leave me mushtaab in one piece of advice, what would it be?

Muzhda:

I think I really love the fact that you started this uh like podcast, like my take accent, and I want you to keep doing this. I think it is, as I just mentioned before, like our cultures, our things that are, differentiate us from the others. It does not mean that it make us to be like so separate us, but cultures can bring people together. Like if I am from afghanistan, it's it's very important that how can I learn to deal with other cultures, learn from different cultures, and I really love the work that you are doing. So I think just keep doing it and you are doing amazing awesome.

Gurasis:

Thank you. And finally, how would you describe your experience of being on this podcast?

Muzhda:

amazing, wonderful. I think I was previously in one podcast but I wasn't maybe like that comfortable in a way that, because it maybe was my first experience, but I've had like the most amazing conversation and it was like the questions, the way you speak, everything you ask, very amazing. So, yeah, thank you so much for that awesome, thank you.

Gurasis:

Thank you for your kind words uh, much time. Thank you for being on the podcast, or how you taught me. Initially, you said tashikor right, tash Tashikur, which means thank you. So thank you. No, I'm not that smart. I have my notes here. But yeah, if you say yes, I did remember that. So Tashikur, and thank you for adding value to my listeners. Thank you.

Muzhda:

Thank you so much for that.

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Gurasis Singh

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