Real Talk about Manifesting, Swingers, and the Journey to Success with Jenn Knoles EP6

We are going deep in this episode today with my new awesome assistant, Jenn Knoles. We're here in my office, and it's the first time we're recording a podcast here, so you know it's going to be special!

We are spilling the tea on all the things, from swinger's parties to breaking down diet culture. From hilarious house party mishaps to deep conversations about personal growth, we're covering it all.

So how did Jenn end up working for me?

She saw an opportunity, seized it, and now she's soaking up all the knowledge like a sponge. She had been hanging out in my DM’s and was ready to speak up when I posted that I was looking for help. That's the power of believing in yourself.

You need this real talk about thick skin and social media games. It’s not easy, but Jenn's learning the ropes.

Authenticity is at the core of everything we do. If you can’t be you, it might be time to look at the situation.

Trust me, we are sharing some stories that'll make your jaw drop.

We're not afraid to tackle tough topics like health, fitness, and mental well-being. Because life's a journey, and it’s nice to know you aren’t the only crazy one trying to survive and thrive.

Go grab your espresso martini (vodka optional), kick back, and join us for a raw, unfiltered conversation that'll leave you feeling ready to take on the world.

Connect with Sam on Instagram or TikTok

Transcript

 I really think. Women want to feel like they are relatable, like  we need to be relatable so we can, offer as much help as we can.

welcome to the crazy ass world of my brain. So I mean, I mean, I've

I think when you're first starting into that I did, I was into bodybuilding. I did a bikini show clear back when  my youngest son was, I think two years old.  Okay. But you just had babies. So do you feel like that was like,  What were you going for there?

 I have to remind myself, How far I've come.

I'm like, I can do anything. Fuck. Yeah. That's that's the idea. I survived a narcissist, sociopath, psychotic  relationship.  And I feel like I could do anything. I was homeless at one point, like it's insane. 

 I was like, I really like your pants. Those look like really cool traveling pants. And he's like, yeah, they're great. You could just stick your hand in my pocket and touch my. And I was like, you were at the airport and I was like, excuse me. Yeah. And he's like, yeah, you could just stick your hand in right now.  And I was like, and I was like, you know, buddy, you can go fuck yourself. Yeah. And I got up and walked.

So I was like, but this is what I'm talking about is it almost gets like this attitude where. I'm like, I'm 39. And this feels like high school. I'm like, so we still have to be on the defense as women.

I can't just say hi to people I know in the airport. And I was like, plus, I'm like, you know, my husband, how dare you talk to me that way? How dare you? And even if you didn't know my husband, I was like, how dare you like say that to me? 

 

All right, Jen, welcome to the podcast. Thank you for having me on.

I'm excited. I'm excited for this new venture and excited that you allowed me this opportunity.  All right. So this is the Samantha Parker show, and I feel like maybe you've been a fan for a while, even though this is only episode number five. I have. You know I have. I've messaged you and been like, I would love to podcast.

And So this is my online stalker.  And look, she hired me. So it worked.  Okay. So today on the podcast, we're going to be diving into a lot of different topics, but Jenna sitting in my office, this is the first podcast I've ever recorded in the office. Oh, exciting. Right. Should we do a little dance? I'm your first, first and last.

No, definitely won't be the last. You know what we should have done is we got a little bar cart in here and we got a coffee set up and I did get espresso martini mix, but we just need some vodka  and we could have had espresso martinis.  So I was saying Sam knows Sam knows I have the potential to be unhinged and make this show 10 times better, but I also got to be professional.

So it's  which would date, which one am I going to be today? You know, the best thing you can do in life and business is just be yourself. Yeah. And it doesn't matter. I agree. Like I've dropped the F bomb so many times. Like it just doesn't even matter anymore. And like honestly learning from you and watching you and you're so authentic and handling issues.

It's being a social media manager. Like I just came into this and I'm like, Oh gosh, that is a lot on your plate and you've got to have thick skin and you've handled everything. Oh, thank you. Okay. So for you guys who don't know, I hired an in person assistant and in fact I was kind of manifesting this and then maybe I was leaving a little like sneaky about it.

So. I was at perks in the drive thru and I was like, I got a message that girl, Jen, because you kept DMing me on Instagram 

yeah. I want to learn. And I honestly, like I ultimately believe manifesting is, again, I talked to you earlier today, like where I came from, I got pregnant at 20. Got married at 20 and where I was at 20 to where I am now, I look back and it's like an immense gratitude and , I got everything I ever dreamed of.

And so I'm thinking, if I ever fell down on those days, I look back and be like, Oh my gosh, I've achieved so much. And now, at that point, I was all about, Helping my husband and helping him with his career and I have two sons and Was I'm blessed and grateful to be a stay at home mom. And so when you gave me the opportunity I was excited because it's part time, but I'm also learning a lot.

Okay, so this is what happened. Okay? So I'm in the drive thru at Perks and I was like, I gotta message that girl back just for one thing I was like gotta be A decent human, you know? And, but I was like, I'm going to message her. Now they moved into my office and she totally could come in and I'll show her how I set up my podcast and everything, you know?

And then that day too, I was like, I wonder if I made a story and I was like, I want to hire a personal assistant. I'm manifesting it. I was like, I wonder if she'll message me. And I did, 

so you were like, can I be your assistant? And I was like, I don't know what that looks like, but you want to come over. And so you came over to the office and then we walked over and grabbed a coffee and I was like, I don't have, I don't have like an assigned role, but I need help. Yeah. And here you are.

And here's the backstory is, I've been a stay at home mom. Like I said, I've been grateful and blessed. And then all of a sudden I was like, okay, me and my husband, our goal, and I, and this is to open a business by the end of, summer. Hopefully. Summer 2024. This year. Yeah. And so I applied for five jobs and  in between those interviews, you had posted that and I'm like, girl, I'll be your, I'll be your assistant.

I know you were like, this dentist office wants me to come work for them. And I was like, well, I don't know. You can work for them. No, I applied for quite a few and they all offered me the job, but, and there's some jobs that I would have been able.  I just, at the end of the day, I'm 40 now and I've got to think about I want to learn things that's going to help me out in the future.

And if I'm going to own a business.  I mean, just working with you for the last week, I've realized how much time it takes. And that's why I think social media for, small businesses are so important because we're, again, I talked to you, we were all, we're all on our phone and social media managers have to learn the latest trends.

They have to learn the latest trends.  They have to learn to do so much. They're on their phones. They're learning all these new techniques. And just  one week I've been here, I realized, wow, you do a lot and you have to have thick skin,  thick skin. You do. So I'm excited to have Jen working with me. So since we were making this up as we go, I was like, I'm going to have you help curate the show.

So she's been reaching out to really cool people. So like,  hormone doctors. We have someone coming in to talk about women's mental health and yeah, I'm really excited because those were things I didn't have time to do was like find and curate what I really want the Samantha Parker show to be about.

And I think that's amazing. And I am so glad that I can help you with it. And the days that we don't have guests, like I'm so excited to kind of correlate shows where we can talk about our own mental health and our own issues. Because I really think. Women want to feel like they are relatable, like  we need to be relatable so we can, offer as much help as we can.

So if a guest comes in, I was like, Sam,  let's do a show that correlates with mental health. And I want to get like a marriage coach and dating coach. I want to get, med spas. I want to get cosmetic dentistry in here. We're going to learn all kinds of things. Like I want to get a lot of fitness  coaches.

I would love to talk to specific fitness coaches because, I made a real the other day. I had been eating. So initially when I worked out with a trainer and I lost a bunch of weight, I was eating 1200 calories, which I found out is absolutely horrible for my body because wreck your metabolism. Yeah. And I have PCOS.

So my blood sugar is like, very in. Yeah. And it's taken me a lot of time to understand what sustainable weight loss is. Because I expected when I started working with my coach, that I found her specifically for working with my hormones and my body that I looked at her Instagram. She's amazing. Yeah.

And you chose a good coach. Yeah. And so I found her, but I have to tell you, I like fought her like no tomorrow, because I was like, well, what do you mean? Like, I thought we were be, be cutting down to like 1400 calories and she's like. Are you insane? And it took me months to hit that calorie goal. And I was like, I would text her and be like, this is stupid.

This is stupid. Yeah. No, I just, I think when you're first starting into that I did, I was into bodybuilding. I did a bikini show clear back when my, my youngest son was, I think two years old  and he is about to turn 14. So he was two. Okay. But you just had babies. So do you feel like that was like,  What were you going for there?

I just, okay, so this is my second baby. I knew it was gonna be my last. And it was kind of like my husband had a lot of connections with bodybuilding and I have a lot of friends in NPC  and all that. And so I was like, okay, this is going to be a bucket list. So I tried it and it's great. But when you, Told me you're eating 1200 calories.

I'm like, girl, that's what I was eating to diet down. That's not realistic. Like anyone eating 1200 calories is, it's just not realistic. So I'm glad you got a coach and I'm glad she was like, what are you doing? And she said that I'm still in a calorie deficit. Yeah. She had the science to back it up. Yeah.

Yes. It was so funny last night, but it's been six months. So it's taken me six months to really see it because I expected to be like, Oh, I'm going to be at my goal weight in like three months. And that's not sustainable weight loss and that's not healthy. No, you have to do it long term and it has to be  a part of your life.

Yeah. And so I'm excited to get, some people in here that like know a lot about it because I thought I knew a lot about health and fitness, but I grew up in the nineties and I was watching, you know, my mom took fen fen. Everyone was taking fen fen and hydroxy cut. Oh my God. I remember buying hydroxy car when I was 17.

They don't make the same hydroxy cut. They took that off the market. The hydroxy cut now versus the one that they had then day and back in the days. Yeah. Different ingredients. So, and then we went through the fat free era. We grew up in that. Oh lean. My mom was all about the Oh lean chips, but we, I mean, I would have, you know, if that was introduced now, we didn't know any better.

Right. But now it's like,  a lot of weight loss drugs are being pushed. And so I'm a little hesitant. I've heard there's good things and it can be good for some people, but I still, I'm, I'm, I need more information and I also want.  To wait it out. Well, I just wanted to feel good. Yeah, I wanted to feel good And so there's been so much more than it's not the number on the scale like I feel good You know, my son said to me last night He goes you look like you have less fat and I was like, oh, thanks. 

Our kids right especially boys  They just are so blunt  and he touch my stomach and I was like, don't ever touch my stomach again.  , I'm warning you, you do that again. I know. Seriously. But yeah, so we wanted to record a podcast because I'm just, I'm just fucking excited to be recording in my office. I mean, honestly, I was like, Sam, how? 

How raunchy can we get this? Like I want girls to tune in and be like,  we need to go, we need to go to brunch. Here's the thing. It's like, I don't want to scare your clients away, but like everyone listens to call her daddy. Right. And so I'm like, Oh gosh, I really could do something like that. But then again, Yeah.

We live in Utah and I don't want to scare people away, but I think a lot of people are interested in, when I moved here nine years ago, I found out a lot of crazy things in our local little town. And I'm like, we should talk about it. I mean, people want to hear about it, I think. Yeah.  What's funny is we grew up like right next to each other. 

You're a year older than me in school. but yeah, we grew up in Utah County. Yeah. How wild. That is wild. It is crazy. So you grew up in Orem and I grew up in Linden. They're right next to each other. Yeah. And I was on the border born in Linden. I was on 1200 North. Oh, I know where this is. That way I would have been in Linden.

And yeah, and I went to PG. I wonder if Linden has it's on high school now. Do you know?  They all still go to PG. Is it it's either PG or Timpani, I guess, because  Timpanogos is off of 1600. Yeah, so during my high school era. So I graduated in 2003. Right? Yeah. Yeah, I graduated in 2002. Yeah.  I'm like, I just don't care.

I'm like, when did I graduate?  But Timpanogos was a brand new high school, and so for some reason everyone was like, oh that's where the rich kids go. And then I was going over to that really ghetto old high school. P. J.? Yeah. Yeah, see? Yeah, well, I mean, so I grew up and I had friends at Orem High at Mountain View, because I went to Mountain View and to Madagascar, but I had friends at Orem High, and then I had friends that went to PG, so it was kind of like, did you kind of have that same thing where a lot of the high schools kind of meshed, especially with football games, and then after the games, the guys would get together and go to like Rock Canyon and start fights and stuff.

Oh, that's funny. That's funny. I don't know. Maybe we were doing different things. Probably. Didn't you grow up Mormon? I grew up Mormon, but, I just wasn't super active. I wasn't Mormon, so. Okay, yeah, so we were probably. Yeah. When we got married, had a baby and got married, and then three years later, I mean, my husband Was, is very, was very active growing up.

And so we had our baby.  Just so people know the reason why I know if someone's listening from like even California, I've had clients be like, What the fuck are you talking about? Like one time I brought up food storage and they were like, what are you talking about?

So Utah County is predominantly Mormon. It is one of the most concentrated Mormon capitals. Like, I don't, that didn't make sense. Concentrated Mormon capitals. But I was the only not Mormon girl on the street and everybody knew it. Where I've heard it's usually the opposite. They're like, Oh, like people, if you're a Mormon, you are the out.

And I would know I was the out. So that's, that's part of it right there. Yeah. Well, like, and I think, , it's gotten better though. It's gotten better. And I think I don't live there. Well, well, no, I mean, like I live in St. George and I'm still LDS and I'll go to church every once in a while. And I'm friends with the lady in my ward and we play pick a ball.

They're active. They know I'm not super active, but they, you know, include me. See, that's awesome. Yeah.  But then, you know, there's certain ones that are like, no, I'm not going to associate with them because they're not active. But for the most part, I think,  I guess in generally speaking from my perspective, a lot of them have been open to,  Being okay with my family not being active.

That's awesome. It's a different story with family, but that's a whole nother episode  You know, I'm putting a pin in that. Yeah. Okay, so growing up in Unisign County for me It was really interesting because kids weren't allowed to play at our house  Like that's that's what I grew up in. Oh, really? Huh?

Because we were not the Mormons. Okay. Yeah So, did you feel like you grew up probably differently because you were part of the I did, and my family was LDS, but we were not active by the time I was like in junior high and high school.  We were active all the way up until I was like 10 years old, and then my family just stopped being active.

But we were members, and all my extended family were very, very LDS. And then,  I don't know. I just, I hung out with a lot of people and I went to a lot of parties and, you know, I, I did party a lot when I was younger. Yeah. Didn't do anything too terrible. One time we got my boyfriend's older sister to buy us like wine coolers.

Yeah. Yeah, I probably did a little bit more than that, but  I didn't do any hard drugs But I definitely partied and football games secretly get a little Wasted before just a little like for lack of better word. I was just a little hoe.  I didn't have like the Mormon Stigmatism of like don't have sex before marriage.

Yeah. Yeah. So like I had sex with my high school boyfriend Yeah, which I don't think that's a big deal. I mean, I really feel like we are born in a different timeline You And how long have you been married? My current husband, I'm just kidding, Jake and I have been together since I was 22. We've been married 13 years.

Okay. See, and I've been married, it's almost 20 years. So. Honestly, like nowadays, like the new younger generation, my son is, he'll be 19, May 17th. And my daughter will be 23rd. Oh my gosh. But like their generation is so different. My son is a very, like  he's such a goody good. Like he's, I don't feel like I sheltered him.

It was almost like it was his personality.  But, he's never had sex, which, you know, I appreciate that. I mean, I think he sees his mom and dad like, Oh, they got pregnant. They had to live a hard life, but yeah, they made it. Like I look at myself and again, where I was and where I am now. So when I have to remind myself, How far I've come.

I'm like, I can do anything. Fuck. Yeah. That's that's the idea. I survived a narcissist, sociopath, psychotic  relationship.  And I feel like I could do anything. I was homeless at one point, like it's insane. But yeah. So Utah County is an interesting culture. So what I think school is we both ended up in Utah, which I always tell people.

It's the sunny side of the state. You know, people will be like, are you from Utah? Like how often do you ski? And I'm like, there's not a drop of snow where we live. Not a drop. Maybe if you go to Brian Head, but other than that, no. It's in as far away. So, you know, I think it's confusing for people cause they think of Utah, greatest snow on earth, Park City.

And I'm like. Oh no, we're like right above Vegas. We're like, yeah,  I'm wandering in the desert. I got burnt at soccer the other day and it's still winter, you know? Yeah. Oh yeah. Oh yeah.  But so you moved here and it was really interesting cause my husband and I had been living in Salt Lake city for 10 years, which is just, there's a bar scene, like you go out and meet people and I was like, Oh, we're going to go out and we'll make friends.

Yeah.  Like we'd go grab drinks and you end up talking to people. That's why I met my husband.  Yeah. And some of my best friends was just like, Being going out and then I realized there was nowhere to go out here. So it's different today. It's definitely different today. I mean, I feel like social media plays a big part, like for the younger generation, it's like.

I don't even know, like, what is it Twitch or maybe it's not, I don't know, I, I sound so old. I'm like, what's Twitch? I could be wrong, I could be wrong, but there's just so many sites for these younger kids to like meet up and hang up. Like we didn't have that. Yeah. We had to go out. Well, no, but  when I moved here in St.

George and at the time they only were, they had one liquor license that they'd given out to the one and only bar. That's what it's called. Yeah. I've been there once. So we didn't know where to go meet people.  And some of the girls that I work with were like, Oh, you go to house parties. Like people just have parties at their house.

I've never ever been invited. So you haven't, I get invited to like come over, hang out dinner drinks. You know? Yeah. Yeah. Like adult house parties. Okay. Yeah. And we ended up at the wrong party once. Oh no. And I didn't realize what was going on. Oh no.  Like, tell me, is this like, okay, cause when I first moved here, I learned some crazy stuff.

You know where we're going with this, right? I think so. Because when I, when I moved here and I was like I met most of my friends from going to the gym cause me and my husband and my kids were gym goers and that's like where we met the bulk of the people. And they were like, Jen, what's your name? Be careful.

Stay away from this group. Stay away from this group. Did you know this group does this? I didn't know. Okay. Yeah. But like, and they told me, but it was like, I, I didn't really believe them cause I was like, yeah. Am I sheltered? Because I don't think that happened. But then also I was younger then. Yeah. So maybe the older generation, you know, I'm like, you know, early thirties and I'm like, oh, well, you know, we're adults.

Consent was a thing. Yeah. But, actually what happened, it's really kind of traumatizing to be honest. I still think about it. So. We were at this party, everyone's having fun, and I noticed, a lot of the guys were really friendly, and I was, honestly, it was kind of refreshing. I was like, oh, these guys are having conversations with me, because I didn't know anyone.

So I was like, you know,  it was like a friend of my husband's from work, and he didn't look the same. We did not know what we were getting into. We're not these people. And if you choose to live that way, that's okay. I mean, to each their own. Like, I don't like, honestly, to each their own. This is just a great story.

I'm just not as sure. I'll just put that out there. Exactly. Now you guys know where we're going with this, if you didn't already. But,  yeah, one of the guys kind of, I had on this really cute short dress. I remember I showed up and I was feeling myself, you know, when you're feeling yourself. Oh yeah.  The weird thing that this guy was like, so do you enjoy your lifestyle?

Which I guess that's what they call it is if you're swinger is you're in the lifestyle and yeah. Okay. So, and I was like, Oh, I do enjoy my lifestyle. Like at that time, I think I'd been in business for like four years and you know, business is all mindset. You're going to learn this, but you were so naive.

And I was like, I actually do enjoy my life. I have a great life. I worked really hard to get here. And I was like, this guy is so nice. I was burying myself. Okay. And then, you know, they're taking shots in the kitchen and he kind of, kind of like put his hand like kind of on the back of my skirt and normally I'd be like, don't touch me.

And I just kind of, I pushed him and I was like, you guys have had more shots than me. And I was like, I'm gonna go find my husband. He's outside by the fire, you know?  And honestly, I didn't, I was not, I did not feel, no, like, was that like your red flag? Like, okay, no, I didn't feel violated. I just was like, but it was like, kind of like a red flag.

Like maybe this was my husband, you know?  And I was like, you guys have had more shots. And I still, I was just like, whatever. I'm not going back over there. Like lots of the fire, I'm out there with Jake and I'm like, Hey, it's, This is like really weird. And his friend, , Jamie was out there and Jamie's like, dude, I didn't know it's going to be a fucking swinger party.

And I was like, wait, what? And I still was like, whatever, you know? So I go back in to go to the bathroom and this is where it really blew my mind. Is I'm like, what are they doing in the kitchen? And this girl was giving this other guy a blowjob and then her husband was filming it. And I was like, that is the most degrading thing I have ever seen in my life.

Like, is this a party trick? And I was like, we're going to go. Oh yeah. That would have been like my first. Yeah. And to me though, it wasn't like an empowering, you know how a lot I've heard people talk about, it's not really empowering. You can do what you want. No. I was like, that's degrading. They got her to suck this guy's dick and film it.

And I was like, what is this? That college? Remember when college, like they would get on the bus and they'd get girls to flash them. Oh, yeah, like girls gone wild. Yes, I was like, what in the fuck are you doing to this woman? Yeah. It wasn't a, like No, that seems awful. You know, people do I do understand that, like, people have different mindsets around sexual stuff.

And I'm definitely not, like, prude in a box. I'm open. I'm, yeah, I'm like, do your own thing, but that is not me. But I, yeah. There's no way. But this was The energy and the vibe of it was just grating and disgusting. So you've been, is that the only party you've been to? Yeah, because, well, no, I mean, I go. No, that was, yeah, and it was an accident.

Yeah. And I didn't realize that that's what was going to go on. I've, I've never been to any of those parties. I think my husband got invited to one, but he was like  the, and then another friend was like, don't go there. Like, I know you, Curtis, like, Like even if I go to just like a regular party like a Halloween party with a bunch of like married couples Oh, my husband's very like one time  See where I'm very extroverted like well I'm very introverted and then like I but I love to talk to people and I love to you know Yeah, and one time we did this Halloween crawl and it was so fun though but the last house we went to it started to get where the girls were you know and all of a sudden everything started to Switch and I was like That's, and I was sober, so I was like, Oh yeah, it's time to go home.

And I was like, well, we're not hanging out with them anymore, but the rest of the night we'd, that was the fourth house we'd been to. It was so fun. Oh gosh. Yeah. But I think that's why we're talking about this because like, honestly.  I've never heard of any of that in Utah County or Davis County. Did you? I lived in Salt Lake.

I mean, what? I lived in Salt Lake City before we moved here. Did you hear about that up there? Well, I mean, I knew that like people were swingers. I mean, I knew more about polygamy than swing, you know? I mean, when I came down here, this is what opened my eyes. And I was like, you're kidding. Like, I just, I, okay.

To each their own, whatever. But I just, I wonder like, why are you married? Why don't you get divorced? Like what's the, oh, a lot of people do get divorced a lot. Well, it ends up in divorce. Yeah. But like, why don't you get divorced beforehand? Like, this just seems a little weird. But, my friend,  I saw a picture with her and I was like, oh, I wonder if she knows. 

The people that were in the picture, you know, but I'm like, Hey, maybe, maybe that's what she wants to do. She's single. She can do what she wants. And then she called me like three or four days later and she was like, Oh my God. She's like, there's this picture on Instagram and I didn't know. And then I went to her and she's like, I think I need to delete it.

And I was like, well, you're just,  she was at a restaurant with, you know, and she's like, people have been texting me. And I was like, yeah.  Oh gosh. Yeah. It was a huge wake up call when I moved here. Cause like when I, when I first heard it, they were like, Jen, stay away from these people, stay away from these people.

Everyone knows me. I'm like, are you being rude? What's wrong with these people? Yeah. Like I'm not like a judgmental person. And I think because I, You know, the more mental health and like struggles that you've been through, the more empathy you have for people. Like, Oh, maybe they're doing this because this happened to them.

Maybe they're doing this cause this happened in this.  Something they enjoy, but there's some people that are crossing the lines. I did have another incident. It just popped in my head when you talk about it because it's still, I probably need therapy from it. So I was on a trip to, I was in the Salt Lake City airport, so I'd flown St.

George to Salt Lake City and I was going, where was I going? It doesn't even matter. But I ran into a couple. , that I would say we were acquaintances, friends, I was friends with the girl, but they are known to be big swingers. But like, again, I'm like, that's your thing. Like, you know, so we're sitting there in the airport and I was like, Hey,   I said the guy's name.

I'm not going to say it on this podcast. I was like, I really like your pants. Those look like really cool traveling pants. And he's like, yeah, they're great. You could just stick your hand in my pocket and touch my. And I was like, you were at the airport and I was like, excuse me. And he's like, yeah, well, his wife was there and you were at the airport.

It was his girlfriend. Yeah. They're still not married, but they still are together. And they're from here. Yeah. And he's like, yeah, you could just stick your hand in right now. And I was like, this was like two years ago. And I was like, and I was like, you know, buddy, you can go fuck yourself. Yeah. And I got up and walked.

So I was like, but this is what I'm talking about is it almost gets like this attitude where. There's still, you know, I'm like, we're almost 40. Are you 40? You said you're turning 40 in August? I turned 40 in August. Yeah, I'm 39. And this feels like high school. I'm like, so we still have to be on the defense as women.

I can't just say hi to people I know in the airport. And I was like, plus, I'm like, you know, my husband, how dare you talk to me that way? How dare you? And even if you didn't know my husband, I was like, how dare you like say that to me? Some, some guys just have no consideration. My husband is well known at the gym.

And he is probably the most overprotective man in ever. And like any girls that I've ever hung out with, they know my husband. So, so I need to get him on team Sam. He's like, he's like,  no, I think like everyone's  don't F with Jen. You, like, Curtis will fucking kick your ass.

Like, don't even entertain the idea of having you as a couple. Oh yeah, my husband was so mad. I was like, He's like, are you okay? And I'm like, I mean, mentally, no. Yeah. Physically. Yeah. Cause I can take care of myself. Right. And I think what happens though is this just giant gray line, right. Where there's like a line where it's like, Hey, these are our boundaries as human beings.

And I think when, you know, this like cross line where it starts happening, I feel like it's just like, it just smears the line where it's like, you should never cross that line. And they're like, well, I can't really see the line anymore because I just do what I want. Yeah. Yeah. It's sick. And it's really, really sad.

Cause I, I know the sweetest couple and I've known them for a long time since I moved here and we saw them at the gym and, same situation and it didn't end well. And I feel really bad because they're both really good people and I mean, they're both doing well now, but yeah, so I've, I've seen, I've seen the ending of some of that stuff that happens. 

I had a friend, She, they had kind of gotten into it and she told me one night, she's like, Sam, it's so horrible now because when I go places, I'm just expected to sleep with people. And I was like, yikes, you're in the wrong group of friends. I literally was like, come here. Just let me give you a hug. 

She's got to get herself out of that. They were like, that wasn't, you know, and I think what happens is they're like, Hey, maybe this would be fun to experiment. Yeah. And I do know,  both of them are coming out of like, Long term Mormon relationships. And so I kind of like, I got a lot of that out as a teenager  and in my early twenties.

Yeah. And I think maybe some people are like, I want to go try all the things. I mean, I get that. I mean, there's a lot of roles in that religion. And so, If they decide they want to leave the religion, I've seen them kind of just go.  Swing. Yes, it definitely does. And I'm not saying I've never done anything crazy, but yeah.

Yeah. But yeah, I've definitely known some. Okay. So we both are from Utah County. We both had to avoid swinger parties. Cause I mean the first, the first like month I got here, they're like, Jen, cause we went to summit and they're like, stay away from this, stay away from this team, you know, like, I mean, it was everywhere we went.

And, my husband left,  so my husband's powerline contractor. So we grew up, Utah County, moved here. Okay.  And one thing I felt like we had in common was, I think when I met, cause me and you had coffee once. Yes. I think my husband was deployed then, right? Yeah. And you were like, my husband, I mean, he wasn't deployed, but your husband's gone a lot.

He  So yeah, he travels a lot. He's a lineman and he's a contractor. He did that since, I mean, we were first married and then he was like, okay, my kids are young. They need me home every day. So he decided to work for municipality for St. George city. Well, that  was just, I mean, I can't say anything, but, , I am so glad that that chapter is over and now he's his own boss.

And.  I mean, he's as high as he can be. I mean, and he could go on further, but it's just, it's just night and day. But we, we made the decision to do municipality where he can come home and be with his kids every day. But we were lucky enough when he went back to contracting, he was able to stick with contracts close to home.

And now he's kind of at the top, so he can choose, pick and choose his contracts. Yeah, but he's gone a lot, right? Yeah, well, the last three years, he was lucky enough to have contracts close to home, so he still comes home every day. Nice. That'll change here soon, but,  we always have the option to, So, I mean, Rocky Mountain Power is kind of union and so if, if it gets too much for the, for him traveling too much, we'll probably apply for one certain area and then move to that area permanently.

But we just like the freedom of contracting and the money is so much better. And that's awesome. And so that's why our goal is to start a business and I'm learning a lot from you and,  like I said, the end of summer, that is our goal. We're going to get a business. We're going to get it going. And when he's doing contracting, which I think is amazing, I hope he can take two or three months off and we can live, you know, we can travel and stuff because when he's contracting.

It's harder to take vacations cause it's like,  he has to finish a project. And so we're always like a wing it type of family. Like, Oh,  we'll know if we're going on vacation, like a week before. Yeah. So, well, yeah, my husband's about to retire from the military. We're so close. We're like a month out, I think.

Okay. Yeah, and you know what's wild is he just got pulled for deployment again. Well, I was wondering what was going on with like everything in politics, like where though, because they are stationed in, I've heard they've been stationed in some crazy areas. Yeah, I don't know to be honest, but,  he's So they had to deny it because his packet had been approved the month before and I was like, Oh shit. 

Oh my gosh. Yeah. I was like, I don't know. It's so, it's like PTSD even thinking about those deployments are wicked. So he's getting out though. Yeah. Yeah. So he's not going.  My, my cousin is in Germany and he, I think he's in, oh, I don't know.  Navy  and they will not let him out. Apparently they can do that too.

Apparently.  If you have a mouth and you are a rebel, they will make it so you can't get out. Well, you have to follow the rules. Yeah. To the T. Yeah. And if you have a mouth and you tell them off or you're just kind of an attitude, oh, you're not going anywhere. You can't get out. Yeah. And that was shocking.

They can do that. They can, you know, be like, no, we want you to stay or do this. But you would think they would want those people out, but apparently they won't let them out. Well, even my husband, I mean, he's, you know, put,  Platoon Sergeant and all that, you know, he's done really well, but they could, they could decide that, Hey, we're going to need you to stay in.

That's scary. I never knew that. I never knew that. Yeah. I think people don't realize what they're getting into. And even my husband didn't, you know, he's never had any like.  Like qualms. Is that the word? Yeah. Is that a word? I get it. No, no. And he says he's just really always felt like a sense of duty, but he's like, no, my life is controlled by that.

And he keeps talking about how he's going to grow his hair long and like have a man bun. And I've tried to be like, yeah. And like, well, babe, you're like, um, 40 now. And like, I don't know if you're like your hairline's going to like support that.  I can't say it, but honestly, like I know of people been like, that were able to get out.

And so I just learned that. A lot of people can't get out. That's, that's frightening. Yeah. So anyways, Jen, welcome to Samantha Parker. That was a great first discussion.  Unwanted DJs in the kitchen. 

Yeah, it kind of went from here and there, welcome to the crazy ass world of my brain. So I mean, I mean, I've been here for a week and I just, I realized how much work social marketing is and these businesses need to realize it's not just something like anyone can do. It's so time consuming.

Yeah. And you know, running a business too. And anytime you put yourself out there, we're also going up against that. And so then I always also have, I'm always going up against my. Level of being uncomfortable because I'm constantly experiencing things that are not comfortable. Right. You know, but I also, when I told you, I was like, okay, I'm uncomfortable in front of the podcast, but I want to overcome it.

And that is straight up growth. And we did it and we did it. Ready? High five. All right. Keep doing it. 

All right  Peace out