The Samantha Parker Show

The Art of Being Bored: Finding Peace in Sobriety with ME Samantha Parker!

• Samantha Parker • Season 1 • Episode 72

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In this solo episode, we dive into the often-overlooked topic of boredom, especially as it relates to sobriety and personal growth. I share personal stories, recent experiences, and insights on how embracing boredom can be a powerful tool for healing and self-discovery. We break down key topics such as, the challenge and opportunity of boredom in sobriety and everyday life. My recent Sunday experience and how I processed feelings of restlessness. The science behind dopamine, alcohol, and why peace can feel uncomfortable. Social media’s role in dopamine hits and cultural shifts around drinking. The importance of leaning into stillness and not sabotaging moments of peace. Practical tips for handling boredom in a healthy way.

Guest Mention: Shoutout to Beth McDonough, former TV reporter and author, whose new memoir is coming out soon. I share the excitement of receiving the first copy and highlights Beth’s inspiring sobriety journey. Find Beth on TikTok for more of her story.


  1. Introduction and Welcome
  2. Shoutout to Beth McDonahue and Book Launch
  3. The Art of Being Bored in Sobriety
  4. Sunday Reflections and Dealing with Restlessness
  5. Dopamine, Alcohol, and Social Media
  6. Cultural Shifts in Drinking Habits
  7. Embracing Stillness and Practical Tips
  8. Closing Thoughts and Calls to Action


Resources & Links:

Step into Your Sober Era! Are you ready to embrace a life of clarity and empowerment? ✨ Check out Sam’s Sober Club on Substack for journals, tips, community and more [Subscribe Now ➔] Sam's Sober CLUB | Samantha Parker | Substack


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Hey guys. Welcome back to the Samantha Parker Show Today. You're getting a solo episode with your favorite person, Samantha Parker. I might talk to Cindy over here. Cindy, grab a mic now. Yeah. I'm recording an episode by myself and I feel like it's been a hot minute. It's probably been since I recorded.

My episode about being a year sober, so this will be fun today. I'm gonna dive into something that's been on my mind a lot lately, and maybe it's on your mind too. It seemed like it was on a lot of people's TikTok minds when I posted a TikTok video about this, I decided to also write my substack if you guys are in Sam's sober club.

 Today we're gonna talk about the art of being bored, 'cause boredom. It's a big thing, especially in your sobriety journey, especially in your life in general. When you start finding yourself bored, I think it's an opportunity for us to lean in.

It's not an opportunity for us to go to old habits, AKA drinking, or think we have to create 10,000 more projects. I think there's a beautiful gift in being bored. Last Sunday I learned a lot about this. So you guys, welcome to the show today. First off this morning I went over to my friend Beth's house.

Shoutout to Beth McDonahue and Book Launch

So Beth Mc Donahue. , You guys probably remember her on past podcast. Episodes. Just one episode. Actually, it's one of my most listened to podcasts and it's pretty recent, like a month or two ago. She was a TV reporter. Worked for Fox News and other popular channels, and was publicly fired because she had two DUIs and wrote a memoir.

If you're on YouTube and you're watching the podcast. I got a copy of her book this morning. I went over to her house and she hadn't even opened the box and she hadn't even seen the book yet. So I went over and got some content 'cause that's what I do as a social media queen. I live to slay the day.

But I went over and got content of her opening it and seeing her book for the first time. I have the very first copy of her book and she signed it for me, which is pretty cool. She said to Sam, social media boss. Stay sober, Beth, I just wanted to give her a shout out. This book standby is phenomenal.

I've already read a PDF proof of the book, and it's super fun to be holding it in my hands. And what else I think is pretty cool about Best Book is it has color photos in it. You can see her on TV news to Houston. Her mugshots in here like she was reporting on a Super Bowl.

It's pretty cool. It's got some old photos of Beth, which I thought were just like fabulous. If you guys wanna check that out, her book will be for Cell soon. At the time that I'm recording this podcast, it's actually not for Cell. But it will be out like super, super soon. So you guys go check out Beth.

Her TikTok is killing it. On our team call yesterday, I said, Hey Jess, I'm gonna have you start doing best TikTok. Because typically I will start like the client's tiktoks. I like to do the keywords. See what's gonna trend and all these things. And two weeks in Beth's already going viral.

I'm like, Jess, I'm gonna hand it over to you. So her TikTok is amazing, you guys. It's her telling different stories about her life and her own sobriety journey and it's really doing well. And I'll pat myself on the back for that too. Okay. 

The Art of Being Bored in Sobriety

But let's talk about boredom today. Particularly the art of being bored.

Sunday Reflections and Dealing with Restlessness

So this is what happened Sunday, I found myself being really itchy and I describe itchy as anxious. I don't know what to do with myself in the first few months of sobriety. That typically was me being like, I just wanna have a drink. I wanna fill this void with something.

I wanna fill this anxiety with something, I wanna celebrate with something. And that's something obviously being alcohol. I noticed myself getting really anxious and itchy on Sunday. It was Sunday night. My husband and I were laying in bed and we were watching Netflix.

He is really into the show lately . I think it's called Quantum leaping he's two seasons into it. It's about this guy who like quantum leaps and he quantum leaps into different bodies and he has to help them.

It's a feelgood show. I keep being like, it's Mr. Rogers. But he helps whoever's body he leaps into, helps them avoid. A horrible, tragic end, or changes the narrative of some timeline where people died and or went to gel, et cetera. It's like a really good, feel good show. I have no idea why he's super into it.

'cause I think the acting is horrible. But that's what we've been watching. In fact, he was all ready for bed last night at 8:00 PM which is so weird for my husband. He, does the dishes every day. I do the laundry every day. It's working for us right now. I think it's a good flow. But his dishes were done.

He'd taken a shower, he was in bed at eight. And I was what's going on? And he's I gotta watch my show. I gotta figure out what happened. And I'm like we all know what happened. Every episode he saves the day and then he quantum leaps into a new body and his name is Ben and he is trying to get back home.

So yeah, check it out, guys. I don't know if I sold it or if you're like, I don't wanna watch it now. It's good, I can scroll TikTok and miss a whole episode and still figure out what's going on. It's one of those shows, but Sunday night we're watching the show.

I found myself super anxious. I was like, why are we just watching Netflix? Like dah, dah, dah, dah, dah. And sometimes I'll act on that anxiety and maybe not in the best way. I was watching myself. When you can tell, you're going through this thought process and you're like, why am I doing that?

Why am I saying that? You really can tell you're trying to stay on top of a spiral I was like, why am I feeling like this? What is going on? I thought it was great. That I did this, but I really gave myself permission and space to lean in and say why am I feeling bored?

Why am I feeling itchy? Because that whole Sunday had been really great. We woke up, went for a walk we started at Dutch Bros, walked a mile down the trails where I live in St. George. The trail systems are phenomenal. That's where I run, that's where we walk a ton.

You can bike like the trails are hands down. Phenomenal. Here. We started at Dutch Bros. We walked a mile, walked back with the dogs, got a coffee, got the dogs a pup cup. It was a great start to the morning, then we went home. I took a shower, we got ready and drove up to Brian Head, which is about an hour and a half from here.

I was going up to get content for one of my travel clients and we bought like Lyft tickets. So Brian had just for contacts, it's a ski resort, but in the summer, you can ride the lift, like the tram up and you can either hike down or ride it back, but it's really beautiful. We bought Lyft tickets.

Unfortunately, this freak hailstorm came outta nowhere and there was like lightning in hell. And it was weird too 'cause like we bought the tickets, it was fine. We went to the bathroom, we came out and it was like, you're not getting on this tram. They closed everything down, which was fine. We ended up at one of my favorite pizza places in Cedar City.

Which is phenomenally fun. It was a fun day. It was a great Sunday drive activity. I could tell you my 14-year-old did not wanna be there the whole time, but I was enjoying myself. So we get home, we're just chilling. We don't have anything else to do, and. I'm like pissed. So I'm like, why do I feel this way?

What's going on? I think a lot of it comes down to when we feel peace, sometimes that doesn't feel like our norm. Recently I heard this kind of thinking pattern described really well.

I went to an event, the Vine Club locally here. They do these luncheons and the speaker described it as the eye of a hurricane. When you're in the eye of a hurricane, everything is really peaceful, but everything on the outside is like absolute trash, like total chaos.

You can either stay in the eye of the hurricane or keep popping into the wall of the hurricane. Ultimately we are always saying we wanna be in the eye of the hurricane, but then we'll do crazy things to cause chaos.

Dopamine, Alcohol, and Social Media

I'm enjoying my Sunday and want to be pissed that I was just relaxing and enjoying peace. There's some science that goes along with this I was using alcohol to get my dopamine hit. Alcohol hijacks your dopamine. When you're drinking alcohol, you get a huge rush of dopamine, which ultimately leads you with a massive crash.

It's like riding a rollercoaster, dopamine hit crash, dopamine. Hit crash. And I actually have some statistics written down here. So after quitting. Little things like, just enjoying your day and that peace, like that eye of the hurricane, can feel really, really flat. And I did some research on this and really see, I did some research on this and it can take 12 to 24 months for dopamine sensitivity to rebalance after heavy drinking.

So when life finally feels quiet, your brain's wiring still crave stimulation. That restlessness that I was filling. It's really just part of the healing process. And I have always been very high functioning. I'm like, oh, we're gonna sign up for this race.

I'll practice more than you. We're gonna do X, Y, and Z. I'll show up every single day. My husband and I have that deal, he does dishes every day. I do laundry every day. Somehow I'm gonna out laundry him. That's just the way my brain works.

It's weird. And so alcohol was like a massive rush of dopamine that almost like. Complimented it. It's almost like a forest fire, right? The fire is burning and you get like this rush of wind. That's what alcohol is doing for me all the time. And so the restlessness that I'm feeling is just part of my healing process, being okay with doing nothing, because ultimately that's what I've been craving my entire life, is to feel some sort of piece, which alcohol also gave me that piece.

So it's a little bit of a wild ride. Alcohol would shut down the like tr. Alcohol would shut down all the noise in my brain. Alcohol would give me that warm, sensational feeling that felt like peace and calm to me, when really it wasn't. It was just causing massive amounts of chaos in my body. Dopamine hit.

Depressed for days. Look at me. Go. I could do anything. I'll say whatever I wanna say. Guilt and shame for a week. It's not a good path to be on I also believe as a culture, we're really conditioning ourselves not to feel that calm that's basically what every social media platform is built on giving you little rushes of dopamine.

Every time you're scrolling a video, you're like, ha, that's funny. Dopamine hit, and they're short bursts of dopamine. I enjoy a good scroll. I just have to be really careful of how I'm using it, and I think everyone should as well. Because I do social media for a living and I will say, too much of anything, it's not a good thing.

The world right now, is even more primed to give us those little dopamine hits the cool thing about all of this is I do think as a culture and a society, we are shifting.

Cultural Shifts in Drinking Habits

So there is a new poll that just came out. It's the Gallup Poll, and every year they do a poll of how many people drink and asking them different questions. And right now it is the lowest it's ever been since 1943. I think that's incredible. So the average number of people in America, this is just for America too.

On this particular poll, and it's the Gallup poll, you can look it up. It's G-A-L-L-U up, u up UP. You can look it up. It's G-A-L-L-U-P. I find the graph very fascinating and there's more stats on there than I'm even gonna talk about. Only 52% of people are drinking.

That means that half of the people you meet don't drink. And that is the lowest it has been in years, like years and years and years. The highest it ever was was sometime in the 1970s, or the 1980s, but it was 73%. That's a huge decline, not drinking is becoming more of a norm. And I'm wondering if it's because, more people are catching on, more people are being very outspoken about it.

That's one thing I do love about social media I get on my FYP and can see tons of people talking about not drinking alcohol. I realize that's how the algorithms work, because I talk about not drinking alcohol. I am being fed content about not drinking alcohol. But either way, I'm not alone.

It's not like I'm the only one out here talking about it. There's thousands of other people also talking about it and being brave enough to say that it changed their lives. On this poll as well, they're also saying that over 53% of Americans now believe even just one or two drinks a day is harmful.

This is a big shift and what was once considered completely normal. Now it's really not. It's like half of the people like, there's two of us sitting in this room. I've got Cindy, my amazing podcast editor. Shout out. We could call you podcast producer.

She's been learning all the things lately, Cindy's sitting here in the room with me, out of the two of us, like there's a good chance only one of us drinks, but it happens. Cindy, I don't think Cindy drinks, and if she does, she better not tell me. She's not old enough to drink anyways, but.

You guys get what I'm saying for every two people you meet, at least one is most likely not a drinker. And I think that's pretty freaking cool. Okay, so back to boredom though. The art of boredom, really, boredom isn't emptiness, and I think we need to recalibrate our minds around this.

I was bored. I was laying in bed watching Netflix on a Sunday night. I was triggered because that was oftentimes, and you know what, I was triggered. And that was because a lot of times. That, like watching Netflix that late at night on a Sunday meant I was hungover, and that's probably what I had done all day,

so I was feeling a little bit triggered by that, but also I was feeling extremely triggered because I was feeling bored, peaceful. I'd had a really good day. I remember saying to my husband, this has been such a good Sunday, like I've really enjoyed this day. Even though we got rained out, I was having a good day.

And so in my mind that good day. I don't know it like it felt too good or something. It felt too good to be true. And if you guys pull back and have these moments of clarity, I bet you've done this a lot in your life. Like when the promotion felt too good, you might have sabotaged it and you might not have even meant to, or the client was super amazing or you were doing really good, with your goals and then you sabotage it.

We do this all the time. It's because it can be hard to feel okay in that eye of the storm. We go through things and when we get to the middle and we're feeling peace and joy, we're like, oh, no. I better jump back in. It's wild. Logically you're like, there's no way I would I do that? But we do it. We do it all the time.

Embracing Stillness and Practical Tips

So really I think when we're having these moments of boredom, we can really lean into the stillness. You can find something creative to do. You can find clarity on a project or clarity on your life. You're giving yourself peace and space and you can rest. I think I have not mentioned that, 'cause I'm not a big fan of oh, we should rest more.

I'm like, what am I supposed to do? Just lay in bed all the time? It messes with my head. Hence why we're having this conversation about being bored. But really that's what I've been seeking my entire life is like that rest and that piece. Okay. I just knocked my microphone over 20 times.

I did just get this new electrolyte drink you guys, this is not sponsored. I just wanna throw this in here. But this is glowy. It's a powder you put in your drink, but it's supposed to be skincare that you drink. It has hyaluronic acid in it, and then it also is supposed to replace like your probiotic drink and your electrolytes.

They gave me this cute water bottle as well, so it's cute, huh? Yeah. So today is my day too. Drinking it. It's supposed to reduce bloatedness and clear up your skin. I have to tell you I have a freaking planet growing on the side of my face right now.

I don't know what's happening. I'm breaking out so bad, and it is clustered on the side of my face, I think it's from this lip blushing. I just got lip blushing done on Friday. This was my second time going in. I won it, so I was really excited. I was like, yeah, I'll go try it, check it out.

My lips though, the second round was my touch-up. They are on fire. I got a bunch of tiny blisters. I don't know what happened. And then it's weird, like the whole side of my face is broken out and I think it's, 'cause that's where she was like wiping, maybe it got irritated or maybe it's just I don't know.

It could be whatever I ate. But I'm excited to try this new drink, but I'm also ready for my lips to be all healed. And basically lip blushing is just a giant tattoo on your lips. I'm ready for them to be healed and I'm ready for them to be feeling better 'cause it's making me feel a little off. But anyways, this is my drink today.

Okay, you guys, if you're sitting there in sobriety, you're feeling itchy, you're feeling restless, you're not broken. I understand that. The calm feels strange. And it feels strange to me too because you're meeting yourself without that noise. You're meeting yourself without that chaos of alcohol.

I know that alcohol comes packaged as connection happiness love celebration and clubs. But it is such a false promise. It is one of the biggest lies we have ever been sold. It is not peace. Being in this space of actually experiencing peace, I think it's a really beautiful thing. So next time you guys are feeling itchy, the next time you guys are feeling bored, I want you to remember this, the art of boredom, we're gonna conquer it because I'm working on it too. We're gonna master this.

The next time I'm bored, if I need a dopamine hit and I'm really losing my mind, maybe I'll walk to Baskin Robbins. I can get a walk-in and I can get a sugar hidden. It feels a lot more healthy than destroying my life. Even if you just give yourself 20 minutes, oftentimes this will pass.

Could you pick up a book? Could you walk outside into your backyard? Could you just do something different? That does not mean when you're bored that you need to redo your whole closet or remanage your whole life, or get on Pinterest and decide that you're gonna rebrand every thought process you've ever had.

It doesn't have to be that. I think the art of boredom is just being bored. And I'm here for it.

Closing Thoughts and Calls to Action

If you've ever felt this, and I know a lot of you have, I've already had a lot of feedback on this topic. I know a lot of you have had.

If you're feeling this way, 'cause I know a lot of you have felt this way, I've gotten a lot of feedback on this topic. Make sure you guys come over to Sam's Sober Club, that is my sober stack. You can join it for free or you can become a paid member. I have some really cool stuff on the paid side.

It's $7 a month. I've got my sober journal. I've got a lot of things for new sobriety, but if you're not on the sober path, 'cause I know that not everyone is and that's cool. Seriously challenge yourself the next time you're feeling bored not to beat yourself down. Not try to like fuck shit up.

Don't ruin your life. Don't start a trash can fire. Just see if you can master this boredom. All right guys. I'll see you guys next week we've been dropping two episodes a week, so I'll see you guys on Sunday. This will be our Wednesday Thursday episode.

 I'll see you guys on Sunday for the Samantha Parker show.