How One Surrogate Turned Setbacks, GD, And A Tough Birth Into Purpose And A New Journey

The story starts with curiosity in a small town and unfolds into a hard-won lesson about what truly makes a surrogacy journey work: fit, trust, and closure. Amber joins us to share how she went from a first match that felt distant and clinical to a second match that clicked immediately—and why a simpler, well-explained protocol helped her achieve a healthy pregnancy after months of waiting. She opens her notebook to compare two clinics’ approaches, spotlighting the difference between piling on meds and choosing minimal, evidence-aligned treatment that respects the surrogate’s body and sanity.

We walk through the emotional terrain of pregnancy after a failed transfer: a gestational diabetes diagnosis, the discipline of diet and nightly exercise to stay off insulin, and how medical anxiety can strain communication with intended parents. Amber shows how she rebuilt trust by inviting direct conversations with her doctors, turning fear into clarity. Then labor tested everything—days of stalled dilation, a face-up baby, heart rate decelerations, shoulder dystocia, and an episiotomy. The baby was healthy, but the moments after birth brought a different kind of pain: silence, missed gratitude, and no space for the private, grounding “first hour” she’d hoped for with her family. We unpack why that brief, unobserved time matters for many surrogates—not to claim the baby, but to complete the story their body has lived.

Amber didn’t stop at survival—she changed direction. Now a surrogacy coordinator at a small, hands-on agency, she offers crisp, practical advice for first-time surrogates: research deeply, expect a slower timeline, ask clinics to explain every medication, and be explicit about boundaries for communication and postpartum plans. She’s already matched with new intended parents whose values align, ready for what she calls a redemption journey built on respect and transparency.

Subscribe, share this episode with someone exploring surrogacy, and leave a review with the one boundary you think every surrogate should set. Your insights help more families find the right match and the right kind of support.

https://stopsitsurrogate.com

Transcript

Welcome & Sponsor Messages

SPEAKER_03 0:00

Welcome. We are a mother-daughter podcast about all things surrogacy. Together, we have brought eight beautiful babies into this world, and we would like to share through education and knowledge about surrogacy with those who want to educate themselves on the topic. This is Stop, Sit, Surrogate. Have you ever thought about growing your family but aren't sure what your options are? Or maybe you're someone who wants to help others experience the joy of parenthood? That's where Northwest Surrogacy Center comes in. Northwest Surrogacy Center is a full-service surrogacy agency that guides intended parents and surrogates through every step of the journey with compassion, transparency, and personalized care. From matching to legal support to emotional wellness, they make what can feel overwhelming feel deeply human and supported. Whether you're considering surrogacy to grow your family, or you're ready to become a surrogate yourself, Northwest Surrogacy Center is there to walk beside you every step of the way. Visit Northwest Surrogacy Center.com. That's nwsurrogacycenter.com to learn more and take the first step towards something truly life-changing. Northwest Surrogacy Center. Love makes families. Surrogacy makes babies. Hi everybody, welcome back to Stop Sit Surrogate. Today we have a beautiful, lovely guest. I'm very excited to talk with you. We were talking a little bit before. This is a longtime listener, which like always just makes me so happy. Um, so would you like to introduce yourself?

SPEAKER_01 1:37

Yes. So hey, my name is Amber. I'm from Georgia. I am a one-time surrogate working on journey number two. Uh, and I work for Exceptional Fertility. Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_03 1:49

Okay, we will get into your job in a minute, but I really want to know how you found out about surrogacy.

SPEAKER_01 1:57

Do you know someone who did it? Actually, yes. So I live in a very small town, and I always was like a little bit interested, like, oh, that'd be really cool to do, but no one around here does that. And I actually went to church with her. Um, and she was doing a twin journey when I was pregnant with my son. And so after that, I just kind of reached out and I was like, hey, like, how did you get into this? Where, where did you go? You know, what do you do? Tell me about it. Um, and so she just told me everything about it, and I was like, okay. So I'll talk to my husband and we decided to to move forward.

SPEAKER_03 2:32

Oh my god. Well, so you found out about this while you're pregnant with your own child, and then you were like, Yeah, I I I can do this again. Mid-pregnancy. Yeah, I can I can do this again. You already sound like a surrogate. Yeah, I'm gonna get pregnant again. I love that. How funny. Okay, so when you so how quickly after then were you like, baby's born, now I can move on, like not move on, but you know, like move forward in the process.

Discovering Surrogacy And First Steps

SPEAKER_01 3:00

Yeah. So, you know, everybody says you have to be finished with your family first, just because if something happens. Um, my husband and I have always said, like, we want two kids. As soon as we had our son, he did not sleep. And he still does not sleep, and he's four. And so we're like, nope, we're done. Oh, and so he was going on one, I believe. Um, I was my goal was to breastfeed for a year, and so I applied, I would say November 2022.

unknown 3:33

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 3:34

Um, and he turned one in December. And so my coordinator reached out and she was like, Hey, um, well, you're breastfeeding, like you have to stop breastfeeding for the time being. So, like, when you're done, just let me know. And so I was like, okay, cool. So I reached back out about February 2023. Um, that's really when I jumped in and I was like, okay, let's do this. Let's hit the ground running. And then it all hit me where you have to just hurry and wait because you have to wait for everything.

SPEAKER_03 4:00

Everything. It would be such a dream if we were like, okay, sign up today, okay, match tomorrow, okay, pregnant next week. Like yes, maybe one day. So amazing, right?

SPEAKER_01 4:12

But amazing, you know, the medical records getting all of that. It's just like, oh, but can we hurry? Can we have a universal system?

SPEAKER_03 4:21

It's the it's the annoying thing about it is like it's not like we could make it fast, but it's like relying on other people to like understand our urgency and make it fast because they definitely don't.

SPEAKER_01 4:33

So I'm also gonna throw another curveball at you. So before I worked here, I was a medical assistant for my OBGYN. How so? So I have that side of things as well. And so I was able to be like, I send my records, I send my records.

SPEAKER_02 4:50

Oh my gosh, that's a huge perk. That did it work? Did it get to go faster?

SPEAKER_01 4:54

Oh, dream. Yes, definitely. They got my records literally the same day.

SPEAKER_03 4:58

Oh my gosh, what a dream.

SPEAKER_01 5:02

I was like, thank you.

SPEAKER_03 5:04

Seriously. Okay, so um when it came time for your journey, did you just did you just go with the same agency that your friend told you? Like, or did you do research or okay, yeah?

SPEAKER_01 5:16

I just went with the same agency. Um, it was kind of one of those things I jumped into at first. I didn't know a whole lot, and actually that's when I found your podcast and started learning a lot. Um, but they're actually 30 minutes from me. Um, and so they do things. We have a lot of local surrogates um in the area, and so um I was able to come and like meet everybody. We went out for lunch. Yeah, so it was really nice. I loved that.

SPEAKER_03 5:43

That is super nice. You don't hear about that very often anymore. I mean, like back when my my mom did it, like a lot of people we meet in person, and like it would be obviously because back then technology wasn't like the go-to thing. So that's cool that that kind of still exists in some parts of industry industry. It does industry.

SPEAKER_01 6:04

I love that.

SPEAKER_03 6:05

How cool.

SPEAKER_01 6:06

Um, and I actually, so my first match, I was matched with an single-intended mom. Um, had I had one transfer, the transfer didn't take.

SPEAKER_03 6:16

Oh that's hard.

First Match: Canceled Cycle And Break

SPEAKER_01 6:19

Yeah, so then after that, um, we attempted a second, and then my lining just wasn't adequate. Okay. Um, so we ended up breaking match after that one. She only had three embryos, and so she was just kind of like, let's try something different. Sure. Um and so I broke match with her. Um, I actually have a little timeline written out. I love you. So my first transfer was in February. No. No, I'm sorry. So I did like med screening with her in over the summer, like August. Okay. And then my my first transfer was not until January or February of 2024.

SPEAKER_03 7:01

Okay. So kind of like a whole year from like being like, hey agency, I'm ready to go. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 7:09

Because when I initially signed up, I wasn't I I thought I was gonna, I thought I had a match, like an independent match that I was gonna bring, but that didn't work out. So it just took me a minute to like match with someone. Um, and so that that ended, I would say, May of 2024.

SPEAKER_03 7:27

Okay. When I do have a question, so when because first-time surrogates, right? Some are like, I have a checklist of things I want my IPs to be. And then some are like, give me anybody. I'm here for anything. And then there's the in-between. Were you leaning more one way, or were you like, hey, if I read the profile and we click, I'm good.

SPEAKER_01 7:48

Yeah. So I'm definitely in the Bible belt, and so my family is very religious, and so at first I was kind of like um heterosexual couple only, just because family judgment and things like that. Personally, I didn't care, yeah. But it was just that sort of thing, and so I was open to an extent to pretty much anybody except for like a gay couple. Um and so uh it just honestly was just like you said, I just wanted to look at the profiles and just see what kind of clicked. And that first time it was honestly like a yes. I was yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. You know? Yeah. Um, looking back, maybe that wasn't so great a great idea.

SPEAKER_03 8:28

That's the but that's the and I say it, I say this lovingly. That's like the because that was me too. That's like the sweet naiveness of being a first-time surrogate, like, you want a baby? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's do it. Like, I'm ready, you seem ready, we can do this. And it's just like you just want to get going, and like, why not? Like everybody's gotta be nice, right? But yes.

SPEAKER_01 8:50

Well, I also wasn't super thrilled with that match. We were on email terms the whole time, and like I was like, email. Mm-hmm. I wanted more, but it was it was very professional. Um, and it was like she was a lawyer, so it was just all like boom, boom, boom. Um, there was nothing like personal to it. She she sent me like a couple things for like Christmas or something, but other than that, it was just so like detached, if that makes sense.

SPEAKER_03 9:16

Business, like unfortunately, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 9:18

Yeah, and that's not what I wanted. But I didn't know that that's not what I wanted.

SPEAKER_03 9:23

And see, you don't you don't know until until it's there. And that's the part of learning. Okay, so then you have a transfer. Is that who you mapped? Is that is that the mom that you had that you did the transfer with?

SPEAKER_01 9:35

Yes, that was the first, the first year, first time. Um, so I had the field transfer in, I think it was February, and then we attempted again in May. Um, and the May one was a cancelled cycle. Because of the line. And I yes, and I actually came out to San Diego for that. So I was I was near you guys. Oh my gosh, you should have been like, hey girl. So near you for that one. Um and so then I would say the beginning of June is when we broke match. Oh, okay. So like right after. Yes.

SPEAKER_03 10:14

How were you?

SPEAKER_01 10:15

Were you did you were you like I hate to say like were you okay, but like did you see it coming or like um no, like I kind of with the first one, so like my transfer just didn't take it all. Like I just didn't get pregnant. Um, I had a false pregnancy test at home because I was testing at home. And so I got a little glimmer of hope, and then I was like, oh, this isn't working. And I didn't understand. I was like, I, you know, like this, there's no reason this shouldn't work. Right. You know, and that's just how I thought.

SPEAKER_03 10:48

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_01 10:49

Um, and then when it came to the canceled cycle, um, I was a little disappointed. Like I said, the communication, um, I had emailed mine to the mom and told her like what was going on, and I never got a response.

SPEAKER_03 11:00

Wow, wow. Oh, I'm sorry. Yeah, that's that's not how it should go.

SPEAKER_01 11:08

Never got a response. And then the clinic was like, Oh, we're just waiting on her to let us know what next steps are. We're waiting on her, we're waiting, and then finally, after I got off work one day, I had an email from her that just said, I've decided not to move forward, and she didn't even tell the agency. Really? Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_03 11:27

So oh wow, I'm really sorry. That's that's a hard pill to swallow, especially as a first-time surrogate, because I want to let you know nothing, you did nothing wrong. Like that's that's not on you at all.

SPEAKER_01 11:40

Definitely, and that's something that I also try, like now being in the industry, like I try to let my surrogates know, like, hey, if this doesn't work, it's not your fault, you know.

SPEAKER_03 11:50

It's still science. It's still I hate to say that that IVF is still a gamble, like, but it is. It's kind of like roll the dice and let's let's more times than not, it will be you know, it'll land on it'll land perfectly, but there are times when it when it just doesn't, and that's on nobody's fault. Yes, yes. Luckily.

SPEAKER_01 12:13

Obviously, going into it not knowing as much, like you don't know that. And so definitely that's why the research is very important, I think.

SPEAKER_03 12:20

Yeah, absolutely. Okay, so then if that ends in June, are you you stay with the same agency the whole time?

SPEAKER_01 12:27

I do. Okay, and so then they're they're very adamant to get me a good match.

SPEAKER_03 12:33

Oh, good, that's good. Yes, good, okay, good.

Matching Again: Finding “I Love Them”

SPEAKER_01 12:37

So they were there to support you a hundred percent. Okay, love that. Yes, yes. Um, I kind of came in at as like, okay, here's what I'm actually looking for now that I've been through this one time. Like, this is what I'm more of what I'm looking for. I want to see more profiles this time. I'm not gonna just go with the first one that I see. Good for you, girl. Yes. Um, so they were able to kind of go back and forth with that. And the way it works here is they typically show the intended parents the surrogate first and just make sure that like they're okay with their bottom line, like everything. And then like we let the surrogate know, like, hey, there's an interest in your profile. Um, would you like to see this intended parent? And you know, yes, most of the time they want to see them, and so that's generally how it works, but you know, it's it's spaces, it's every everybody's different, it's basically different, you know. So in my instance, I think they did show me profiles prior prior to the parents seeing me.

SPEAKER_02 13:32

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 13:33

Um, so uh I got a profile from Samantha that you had talked to. Um, I was actually with a different coordinator, and Samantha had this set of parents, and um, they sent these parents to me and I read their profile, and the first words out of my mouth was I love them. And everybody else, it was just like, Oh, I like them, oh I yeah, I'm interested, you know, just kind of eh. But it was just like I love them, I have to meet them. Okay. Perfect. That's how it should be. That's the that's the feeling you should get. Definitely, definitely. Um, and I actually have my whole timeline out here. So July 2nd, uh is when I had my Zoom call. Okay. Um, that was 2024. 24, okay. So I had my Zoom call with them. And if I remember in right, like it was actually it was on a Tuesday. Um, and then that Thursday, I had another Zoom call scheduled with um, they were actually in Arizona, and then I had the parents that were in Atlanta, which is you know, of course, local to me.

SPEAKER_03 14:34

Really close to you.

SPEAKER_01 14:35

Yes. Um, so I was gonna talk to both of them and just see which one I liked more because they were both pretty interesting. And I had that Zoom call and I got off and I was like, nope, that's it. That's them.

SPEAKER_03 14:47

Oh my god, the Arizona, the Arizona one?

SPEAKER_01 14:49

Yes, yes. Oh wow. So I was like, that's them. So my coordinator called and she was like, What do you think? And I was like, I that's it. Like, how do I not have this other call because I know this is them? And she was like, it's okay, like we'll just tell them, you know, that you matched with someone, and I was like, okay, cool. Um, so we did that. Um, they moved forward with getting medical records approved with the clinic. So that took a minute. Um, that was done on July 18th. So wow, quick. Yeah. Um, on July 29th is when I did my like baseline. They let me do my um everything like locally to me. So I like I had my PAP and like the best exam and all of that done. Um then on the 12th I did my like saline ultrasound of August. So August the 12th. Boom, boom, boom. Yeah, girl. Yeah. Um, I was ready at this point, of course. Oh, for sure. So I did my saline ultrasound, all of that came back good. That was 8.12 and then 8.13. I had my sock appointment. It was just just mine. Okay. And then we also had to do a group sock, and that was on 8.19.

SPEAKER_03 16:06

Oh my goodness, is this quick?

SPEAKER_01 16:10

Yes, yes. This one was very quick compared to the to the first time. Yeah. And I was very shocked. So, um, so then 8.26. I'm officially medically cleared.

SPEAKER_02 16:21

Wow.

Protocol Whiplash: Too Many Meds Vs Simple Plan

SPEAKER_01 16:22

Mm-hmm. Um, legal, we finished that on 1010. Okay. Um, and then girl, like I can break this down to like my cycle day one was 1025. I started issues in on this day. Oh my gosh, I love how you have all that. I purposely, because like I knew that I wanted to do your podcast. Oh my gosh, I love you. Like, I just wanted to keep up with everything. I was like, because I know you ask all this. Like, so how was your meds? What was your med protocol? What was your med for? Oh, that's a great one. What was your med protocol for the for the tra for the first one? So I actually have both of those on my computer. I love you. This is so great. Um, so it was a little bit different. So my very first transfer that didn't take, um, I just did lupron, which is the shots in your stomach that like suppresses your ovaries. So I did that for a little bit. Um, that clinic was insane. I had to do lupron, I had to do oral estrogen plus patches. I would love the patches. I never got to do those. In addition, I also had to do estrogen injections. Okay, that's a lot of estrogen. Yes. I we had to bump down on my estrogen. Whoa. I'm telling you, they were crazy. That is a lot. Um, progesterone was also in all three forms, um, oral, vaginal, and injectable.

SPEAKER_03 17:54

Oh, suppositories suck.

SPEAKER_01 17:56

Yeah, yeah. I know y'all talk about it though. It honestly wasn't that bad for me.

SPEAKER_03 18:00

I didn't think you're one of the lucky ones.

SPEAKER_01 18:02

Yes, yes. So I don't know what it was, but your your body can just handle it. Yes. Um, they also did a combination of like two or three antibiotics, and I normally it's just like one antibody like a rot before your transfer. Right. Okay, wow. Wow, that's a lot of medications. Also on prednisone, and like they didn't explain to me like why for some reason. Okay. And so, and then on and then I was on birth control pills as well.

SPEAKER_03 18:31

Okay, so I've been on prednisone before, and that's just to kind of my understanding when I asked, I was like, this, this is the this is to bring inflammation down. What are we doing? And they're like, yeah, just to like make sure that you're chilling. Like everything's good. There's no basically it's to calm everything and make everything just cozy, happy, healthy, okay, same level. Which I get, but it's a it's a very it's a very I was always very weirded out. I'm like, prendosone's a very strong drug. Why are we going on a steroid?

SPEAKER_01 19:06

Yes, yeah. Well, then the the second time they hit me with a new protocol because they were like, okay, well, the first one didn't work, so let's do something different.

SPEAKER_02 19:15

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 19:15

They put me on heparin, which is a blood thinner. Yes, it is, and so I did heparin injections on top of everything else. I think the second time. Oh, I was on baby aspirin as well. I forgot that one. That I was on I was literally on a handful of pills. Yes.

SPEAKER_03 19:32

Oh my gosh, but heparin, I've never heard not saying that this hasn't happened. I've just never heard of somebody being on heparin. It's always baby aspirin, because that's a blood thinner, and that's just like a mild version of it.

SPEAKER_01 19:47

So if I'm if I'm counting correctly, so leading up, I was on the birth control, the lubron, the klindamycin, which is an antibiotic. So that's three. Then I started estrogen and prenatal, so that's five. That's a lot already. And then one, two, three, four, four more. So that's nine. Pills? Um, a variation. It's a it's just everything together, right? Plus, there's the Esther Dun injection. So I would say like 10 to 11 medications I was on. Literally insane. And I need to also mention I'm a horrible pill taker.

SPEAKER_03 20:34

No, it's okay. I have I know I have to I have to have alarms on everything. But like No, like I physically like struggle taking pills. Oh, taking them.

SPEAKER_01 20:42

If they're the horse ones to do, I have to do like one at a time. Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_03 20:47

Oh, I don't get how people can do multiple, like just like a handful. I I would choke.

SPEAKER_01 20:52

Yes. Yeah. So I I went from that to um my clinic where my transfer work, I did two estrogen tablets twice a day. Um, and then right before transfer, I did doxycycline, which is the antibiotic, and progesterone injections. And that was it. That was for the second one. Maybe I did baby aspirin, but it's not on here. And of course, like the prenatal. You probably did, yeah. That's that's way less.

SPEAKER_03 21:23

I'm not a doctor, but that the first round seems like that's too much.

SPEAKER_01 21:29

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_03 21:29

Going like that's too much for your body to process.

Transfer Trip, Connection, And Positive Betas

SPEAKER_01 21:33

And like they literally, so I left the day, like my cycle got canceled. I left that day, and then I did not hear back. My appointment was say like 10 o'clock that morning, right? I did not hear back from them until like 6 p.m. to let me know that my cycle was canceled.

SPEAKER_03 21:51

Oh, well, that's not what?

SPEAKER_01 21:54

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 21:55

That's I mean tracking everything I've heard about them. Ridiculous. Yeah, no, because that's normally they'll tell you right then and there, like, oh, your lining's not thick enough, so like we gotta postpone.

SPEAKER_01 22:06

Like they made it seem like, oh, like we're just gonna have to talk to the doctor and we'll see like what what he says. Okay. I was like, all right. And then side note also, um, do you watch the Mormon wives?

SPEAKER_02 22:19

Oh my do I watch the secret lives of wives? Of course they do.

SPEAKER_01 22:24

So Macy, oh, don't be judged. We all love it. Um Macy actually went to that clinic that when we were watching it. I was like, oh my gosh, I looked at my husband. I was like, that's where we went. Shut up. Oh how funny. Yes. Oh wow. I was like, oh, that's crazy.

SPEAKER_03 22:42

That's kind of far from her, isn't it? They're Utah. Yeah, I don't know. Is my geography wrong? Are you guys close to Utah?

SPEAKER_01 22:50

No.

SPEAKER_03 22:50

No, you're not. I didn't think so.

SPEAKER_01 22:52

Well, that was in Utah and California is not that far, I don't think.

SPEAKER_03 22:56

Oh, in California.

SPEAKER_01 22:58

Yes, yes.

SPEAKER_03 22:59

Oh, I don't know why I'm thinking it's in Georgia.

SPEAKER_01 23:01

No. Okay.

SPEAKER_03 23:02

Oh, yeah. Those I'm so sorry you had to go through all that. That's a lot. That's crazy. But at least the second time we got it all. Yes. Yes. We got it all figured out. And it worked the first time. I was gonna say, did it work the first time? Was it a one embryo transfer? It was. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 23:19

Did it split?

SPEAKER_01 23:20

No, no. Okay. I've only done I've only done a singleton. Okay. Um so yeah, so back to my little timeline here. Um so my transfer was I didn't write this down for some reason. My transfer was November 13th. Um, and like I said, it was in it was in Arizona. We were in the Phoenix area, and I brought my mom with me to transfer. Um me and my mom are both just like, she's one of my biggest supporters, other than my husband. Um, she me and her are both just alike, we will go somewhere and we won't have a plan and we'll just go. And so we ended up driving like three and a half hours. I had to go down like a day early for an ultrasound. And so we had like two days before the transfer. So we spent the day in between. We went to the Grand Canyon. How fun! Oh, it was so fun, and so like that was just such a good memory because like I don't know that I would have ever gone with without doing this, right? Exactly. Of course, like we paid for everything, like as far as like that goes. Like, we didn't put it online to no parents or anything, but oh, it was so nice. Um, but I got to meet my parents then. Oh, we met the day before my transfer. Uh, we went to like a Mexican restaurant and I got to meet them and um we took pictures and oh, it's just so nice. And I I actually learned so they found me off a third party off of Ghost Orc. Um, and and Exceptional works with Ghost Orc. Oh, okay. And um they said, like my intended mom started like telling me, like, because I asked, Well, how did you guys find me? Like that kind of thing. Like, how did you get to Exceptional? You're all the way in Arizona and they're in Dalton. Like, how did you match up? And she said, you know, they found me on there, and they said that they had gone through like 80 profiles, literally. And she was like, We just did not find the one. And I have not, I had not said anything to her at this point about like my story of how I felt about them. Right. And the first thing out of her mouth was, we just read your profile and fell in love with you.

SPEAKER_03 25:27

Oh, meant to be meant to be meant to be, yes. Oh that's amazing.

SPEAKER_01 25:36

So it was it was just like we just loved each other. Um, and then it also like she felt good because I worked in OB and I was able to like, you know, be there.

SPEAKER_03 25:46

Cute, like if I was an intended parent, huge sigh of relief. Yes, like big flex. She knows what to do, what not to like not that surrogates don't, that's not what I'm saying. Like I wasn't, I didn't work in OB at all, but like just an extra level of like okay, got it. And if something's if if you feel like something's off, you can immediately just go be like, hey, hey doc, what you think? Like 100%. Oh, love that.

Pregnancy Highs, Work Reactions, And GD Diagnosis

SPEAKER_01 26:13

100%. So um they came to the transfer as well. Oh, both of them? They did, yes. Were they allowed in the room when it was happening? They were. So they both were there, and so was my mom. My mom was like, This is weird, I'm here while you get pregnant. Oh my gosh. Party in the room. Um, and what was so funny is so I don't know how your transfers have ever been, but I was I just had a gown on, but I was clothed from the waist up. And so when I went to sit down on the bed, they were like, You're gonna have to like pull the gown out from under you. And so, like, I didn't want my butt to show, so I'm just trying to like, you know, scoot down. Be ladylike, yeah. And I said, Well, at least you took me to dinner first. Very cute. Oh my gosh, that's so oh so um, so we transferred uh a little girl. So they knew going in. Okay. They knew um it was their healthiest embryo, and it just happened that they did want a girl. So perfect. That worked. Um, so that was the 13th of November, and then my first beta was the day before my birthday on the 22nd of November.

SPEAKER_03 27:23

Gosh, what a nerve-wracking birthday!

SPEAKER_01 27:25

Yes, yes. Uh, I think it was actually supposed to be on my birthday, but it was on a Saturday. Okay. And so they they moved it to the day before. Um, I don't remember my numbers though.

SPEAKER_03 27:36

That's okay. They were clearly like they weren't low, low where you were like scared, right?

SPEAKER_01 27:41

Yeah, they were wonderful. Okay, great. Great where they were supposed to be. I was able to also like reassure her because of I like a new, you know.

SPEAKER_00 27:48

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 27:48

Um, and then we had a heartbeat confirmation on 1219. And then on 1.3, 2025, I was released to my OB.

SPEAKER_03 27:56

Oh my gosh, I just got the chill. Oh my gosh, that's amazing.

SPEAKER_01 28:02

Wow, that happened so freaking quick. Definitely. And is it gonna it's gonna blow your mind too? So I delivered July 19th and I matched with them July 2nd.

SPEAKER_03 28:13

Oh my gosh, wow. That's that's a very quick journey.

SPEAKER_01 28:18

It was, especially like I said, compared to the first. Yes. Intended parents that I was.

SPEAKER_03 28:23

Sometimes I gotta go through some bumps to get to the to get to the other side. But yeah, that's really that's really amazing. So did you how was like pregnancy? Like, did you have complications? Everything was yeah, smooth.

SPEAKER_01 28:38

Um so I was very sick with my son. I was nauseous. I never threw up with him, but I was just very nauseous all the time. Um, with her, no sickness at all. I was like, okay, what is this? Love it. Um, but pregnancy, I honestly would have to like remind myself, hey, you're pregnant, you know, because it I wasn't looking forward to my own baby, you know. Right.

SPEAKER_03 29:03

You have a different mindset when it's not definitely yours.

SPEAKER_01 29:09

Definitely. Yeah so um everybody at my work knew because I was very open with it with them, and they were all excited for me. And so the physician's assistant that I worked for, um she was like, we would be in a room doing a pap smear with somebody, and she'd be like, Did you know she's pregnant? And they would be like, Oh, congratulations! And then she would she would say, It's not hers.

SPEAKER_03 29:33

So she enjoyed that part. She was like she'd be a friend, she is pregnant, but it's not hers. I'm just gonna have this conversation with her. Telling all the patients about it. I love that. That's it's a fun shock. I speak from experience, it's a very fun shock factor.

SPEAKER_01 29:48

And my husband loved it too. My husband would be like, Oh, oh yeah, Amber's pregnant, but it's not my baby. And they'd be like, Oh man, I'm so sorry. And he'd be like, Oh, it's not hers either. Oh my oh, that's right. That's so funny. So yeah, he he loved it also. That's so good. But um, yeah, so pregnancy-wise, it was all good. Um, I did fail my gestational diabetes screening, so I had gestational diabetes. Oh, you did have gestational diabetes? I did, I did. Um, and one thing about me is I'm a very picky eater. Okay. Um, I eat like a toddler. So um the only vegetables I like are green beans and potatoes, and potatoes are starch. So at least you like green beans.

SPEAKER_03 30:34

Like I I tell my I'm I tell my son the same thing. The only thing he'll eat is broccoli. So I'm like, at least you got one vegetable. Exactly. Just eat a bunch of that.

SPEAKER_01 30:43

So definitely had to make a bunch of changes because at this point I 100% knew that like I want to do this again. Okay. And so I did not want to be disqualified by, you know, because if you go on medication, you're disqualified.

SPEAKER_03 30:56

I was gonna ask. So, because I we actually haven't really talked about gestational diabetes in anything, in pregnancy or in surrogacy. So I am curious. So, so you failed you failed the hour one, right? I hate saying you failed, you didn't pass the hour. Okay.

Diet Control, Exercise, And Trust Tensions

SPEAKER_01 31:15

I failed it by I think it was like 160 or 170, and at my office, the cutoff is 140. Okay. Um, so a little education, and it's it's not cheating, but it's cheating almost. Um, but if you go into it with the right mindset and you know like more education about it, so as a pregnant woman, you're not supposed to go more than like a couple hours without eating anything, um, because it makes your body like take its own fat pretty much, you know, like you go into like ketoacidosis. Sure. Um, and so we say in the OB world, like you need to eat six small meals a day kind of thing.

SPEAKER_04 31:53

Sure.

SPEAKER_01 31:53

Right. So when I was preparing for my one hour, I I was uneducated even working there, like I didn't know a whole lot about it. And I went into it fasting. So let's say I didn't eat after like six or seven p.m. And then I did my test first thing the next morning. So that was almost 12 hours, if not more than 12 hours with no food. Right? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. And so what happens is your pancreas like will dump you a lot of sugar once you get to a certain point, and so you get this big overrush of sugar, and like it can cause your fasting things to be abnormal, like in this scenario. Does that make sense?

SPEAKER_03 32:37

It does. That's very interesting. Cause I've done that. I always made mine like first appointment in the morning because I'm like, okay, you guys told me I I couldn't eat before or whatever, blah blah blah blah blah. Every office is different for sure.

SPEAKER_01 32:51

Yeah, yeah. How interesting. But my recommendation and like going forward, like I started telling patients, like, eat before, just don't eat anything super sugary, you know, eggs, you know, no bread, because bread turns to sugar, you know. Don't eat a brownie. My you're right, my sister-in-law ate a brownie and failed. Oh, yeah, that'll do it. Yeah, protein, protein, protein, protein. Um, and so like it was one of those things, like, I wish I could have like went back and just done my one hour again. And realistically, like I probably could have. Like, I worked there, I could just kind of goodbye. But I was like, well, I'll just do the three hour. Like, I'm not gonna fail. I failed by one point. Oh no, by one point. So so for the three hour, you have four lab draws typically. You have a fasting, a one hour, a two hour, and a three hour. It's super fun. Um my fasting was abnormal, and it was abnormal by like not a lot. It was it was very minimal. And then the other values, they they vary to based on like which hour you're in. So, like I don't remember which one it was for sure, but like I think it might have been the two hour, it has to be under 140 for that one. And I was literally like 141. Oh, and to fail the three hour, you have to fail two numbers, and so I failed the fasting and the two hour. And then my other two were good, but so I literally failed it by one point. If I if I would have been one point below, I would have passed it. Oh my gosh, how annoying! So I was like, Okay, I'm not the best with diets, but we're gonna do this. Um, so I forced myself, not forced, but kind of forced myself to drink two bottles of water after every meal. Okay. Um, and so I definitely got my water. Um, my fasting was my biggest issue um because you can't control it, you know, it's it's there whether you're you've ate or not, you know. Um, I did all the tips and tricks. My high risk doctor said, you know, check it while you're still laying down, don't get up, like all the things. I tried everything.

SPEAKER_03 35:02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 35:03

Um, they were really close to putting me on insulin. Um, I also started taking like cinnamon capsules because cinnamon's good for your sugar. And it's just cinnamon, like it's not gonna hurt. Okay. So I was willing to try whatever. Um, I also started riding eight miles on an exercise bike. I worked up to eight, but I did that every night after dinner. You go, girl. Because it was sweltering hot.

unknown 35:26

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 35:27

Um, and so I wasn't gonna get outside and walk. So yeah, yeah. So that actually ended up leveling out my my fastings. And so the the dietitian was like hardcore pressing, like, hey, you should do insulin. And I was like, my doctor was saying, No, you're fine, like you got this. Yeah. Because they knew like that I was really working towards doing surrogacy again and I couldn't do insulin. And so I just kept telling my diabetic educator, I was like, um, I'm gonna wait until I talk to my MFM doctor because you're you're not the doctor. Let me talk to him first, right?

Gallbladder Scare, Surgery Timing, And Recovery

SPEAKER_03 36:03

Yeah, I feel like that's just like a quick fix. Like, go on insulin, it'll get fixed. And it's like, but it give me some time to like see if if I'm not in danger and the baby's not in danger, like give me some time to like work it out myself. Because our bodies are pretty smart, like yes, as long as we give it what it needs, it most of the time can figure it out. So good for you. That's a lot of dedication.

SPEAKER_01 36:26

Definitely, definitely. Um, I will say, as much as this journey was amazing to me, this is kind of where the relationship started to kind of take a turn. Oh, because of the because of the gestational diabetes? Yes, yes. My intended parents were like, Do we need to come now? Are you gonna give birth tomorrow? Like, what's going on? You know, they just got worried. They got worried. Um, and it kind of went from they don't trust what I'm saying as far as like I'm okay. Like they had to hear it from higher doctors.

SPEAKER_03 36:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 36:57

Yes. And so it was like, okay, like we got this. So I let them talk to my doctor, let them ask all their questions, and he was like, No, you absolutely don't need to come right now. Like, she's fine. This can be a normal delivery. Because then they were like, Well, does she need a C-section? Does she need, you know, what do we need to do? Right. And so um that kind of shifted a little bit. Okay. Uh, also around the same time, and it may have happened a little bit earlier. I think it happened a little earlier. I ended up, I I think I was around 23 weeks. I thought I was having contractions. I woke up in the middle of the night like just hurting so bad. And turns out it was my gallbladder.

SPEAKER_03 37:42

Oh my gosh, no, not while you're pregnant.

SPEAKER_01 37:46

Yes, yes. So thankfully, though, that was really the one and only time because I did change my dieting um because of the gestational diabetes. So I didn't really have any other issues like while I was pregnant, but I did have gallstones. So I was like, okay.

SPEAKER_04 37:59

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 38:00

So I went and asked um general surgery. I was like, I went and saw one of the doctors. I was like, hey, like, can you just take my gallbladder out while I like right after I have the baby? You know, I'm already in the hospital. I'm already, you know, can you just do it? He was like, No, you have to wait two or six weeks postpartum. I was like, okay, fine. Really? Yeah. He said that the uterus is still too large and so he can't get to what he has to get to. So that's fair. So um I guess I'm skipping forward a little bit too. You're good. But um, so I delivered in July. Okay. And we can go back to delivery in a minute, but I delivered in July, and so my six-week postpartum, it was in August.

SPEAKER_04 38:42

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 38:42

Um, I was going on a cruise around six weeks, I think. It might have even been four, honestly. Um, that was like my gift to myself. I was like, ooh, let's do this.

SPEAKER_03 38:54

Wait, I went on a cruise in August. Okay, okay. What what state did you go out? Did you go out of Florida? Out of Florida. Oh, then never mind. We didn't go on the same one. Yeah, that makes sense. You go out of Florida.

SPEAKER_01 39:07

Um, yeah. So I went though, and my general surgeon was like, Well, if I was you, I wouldn't go on a cruise. Because I was asking him, like, okay, so what can I do to like help my gallbladder? Like, if something happens while I'm there, because obviously I I'm not gonna have gestational diabetes anymore, and I'm gonna eat what I want to eat. Oof. Um, that's a hard. I was like, Well, sorry, I'm going, bud.

SPEAKER_03 39:35

We'll be right back. But first, I want to take a quick moment to talk about something close to my heart, helping families grow through surrogacy. If you've ever thought about becoming a surrogate or if you're an intended parent ready to start your journey, Paying It Forward Surrogacy is here to guide you every step of the way. At Paying It Forward Surrogacy, you're not just a number. You're supported, celebrated, and connected with real people who've walked this path before. Whether you're just starting to explore or ready to take the next step, they'll make sure you feel informed, empowered, and cared for from day one. Visit Paying It Forward Surrogacy.com to learn more. That's Payingit Forward Surrogacy.com because every journey to parenthood deserves heart, honesty, and the right support. Now let's get back to the episode.

SPEAKER_01 40:22

Um, I actually and I did start having like gallbladder issues on the cruise again. No, it it wasn't severe, um, but it did like wake me up at night a couple times.

SPEAKER_03 40:33

Yeah.

Induction Stalls, Positions, And A Long Labor

SPEAKER_01 40:34

Um and then it just kind of stopped again. So I was like, okay, cool. Like I've just I've just been off work for these like six, seven weeks. I'll go back to work for a little bit, and then before the holidays, like I'll get my gallbladder taken out. No big deal. Um, the week before I was scheduled to go back to work, it hit me very bad. It was around Labor Day. Hit me very bad. Um, couldn't sleep, couldn't do anything. Like anytime I would eat anything, it would like just start hurting so bad. So postponed going back to week work a week. Had my gallbladder out Monday, went back to work on Friday.

SPEAKER_03 41:10

Oh my god, oh my gosh. Oh bless you.

SPEAKER_01 41:14

I was out of time. I was out of like my my PTO time. Like my job made me use all of it, and so I didn't have any of it. And that technically wasn't pregnancy related. So like I couldn't get right, you couldn't extend it.

SPEAKER_03 41:27

I so I speak from experience when I say I literally know your pain. I had my gallbladder taken out in 2023. Worst pain I've felt um awful, and I had to go back to work the next day. It was a whole shebang. Yeah, it was super great. Um, so I am right there with you. At least you got a couple days. Yes, yes, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 41:53

And my work, thankfully, was like, oh, you just take as much time as you need. That's very nice. Mine was not. Oh, it's very nice.

SPEAKER_03 42:01

No, but that's I'm I'm really sorry because that's like I can't even imagine having to deal with that six weeks postpartum. Like you're still recovering from like a whole other shebang over here, and now you have to like because gallbladder pain is very intense. It's a very, very intense, excruciating pain. Maybe not for everybody, but for me it was, and by the way that you sound, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 42:24

It was in my back. It was it was oh awful.

SPEAKER_03 42:28

Yeah. It be I was like, I would tell my husband I would wake up in so much pain. I'm like, I would rather have a baby without medication right now, because at least then I know when it's gonna be over. Exactly. Exactly.

SPEAKER_01 42:39

This is just I would have to get up and like go sit in a recliner and just try to like sit as upright as I could and still try to sleep. It was just like, oh hate this.

SPEAKER_03 42:50

Oh, well, I'm glad that it was taken care of and it was you're feeling better now. Yeah. Definitely, yes. Good. Well, then how was delivery? Did you you said six weeks, so I'm assuming not a C-section. Correct, correct.

SPEAKER_01 43:03

It was a vaginal delivery. Um, so I delivery was okay, I will say. Okay. Um, it was not as good as my son. So my son uh was an elective induction. Like I was due right before Christmas, and I was like, you're gonna be here before Christmas. So I did that and I had him within 12 hours. Um with my surrogate baby, I had a planned induction because I also like I have no desire to go to 40 weeks. Take take the baby as soon as you can. We're at school. I did you, yeah. Um, so I had an induction scheduled, I think it was for July 29th. Um, my due date was August 1st. Okay. Okay.

SPEAKER_03 43:42

Oh, that's like nothing.

SPEAKER_01 43:44

Yeah, yeah. Yeah. So I ended up we had Bible school at church, um, and I was teaching like the 10 year olds. And so we're at Bible school all week. I've started having contractions. I'm like 37 and some change weeks. Um So almost 38. Uh Wednesday comes and like things are just a little bit different. Like it's like more consistent. Most of the time they would stop. So more consistent contractions. Um and so I left early, and because I had my I had my nephews with me. So I left early, took them home, and then I went home and like I took a shower and tried all the things to see if it would stop or see if they kept going. Um I texted my PA that I work with and I was like, Melanie, what do I do? Like, do I need to go? You know, whatever. Um, and then also to mention, so my intended parents had just arrived that Saturday. Okay, so they were there. Good. They were. I turned 36 weeks on Friday and they got their Saturday.

SPEAKER_00 44:44

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 44:45

Um, they came early just because, like I said, they were worried about everything and they wanted to be cautious. They worked from home, so they were able to like work here. So they just rented like a long-term Airbnb. Um, so they were here, and I'll the whole time I was like, oh my gosh, they're here so early. They don't need to be here this early. I went, I gave birth to the next week. Oh my gosh. Yeah, I had her, I had her the next Saturday. Um, they were in the hospital longer than they were in their Airbnb. Really? Really? So um I texted her around like seven o'clock that night, seven or it was either seven or nine p.m. and I was like, hey, like I'm having contractions, um, they're like five minutes apart, you know, but I'm not really hurting, like they're just consistent, but I just wanted you guys to be aware, like be ready just in case. Um, and she really pushed like, hey, let's let's go ahead and go to the hospital. Like I live 45 minutes away from the hospital. So she was like, let's just go ahead and go. Like, I'd feel we'd feel better if you were already there. So I went. Um they they checked me and I did progress. I went from like a centimeter to three.

unknown 45:59

What?

Water Breaks, Heart Decels, Shoulder Dystocia

SPEAKER_01 46:00

In the hour that I was there. Okay. Okay. Um, so that is Thursday at like 12 to 1 a.m. Okay. Okay. Finally, finally when I get there. Okay. Um, I once again did not have the baby till Saturday. So they kept me. They what? They kept me.

SPEAKER_03 46:22

Oh, okay. I thought you said they cut you, and I'm like, what?

SPEAKER_01 46:25

No, no, well, maybe, yes. Oh no. But yeah. Um, so they kept me and we're doing all the things. And because I'm not 39 weeks yet, they can't do anything until I get to either six centimeters or my water breaks to like help me progress, right? Right. Wait, how many weeks are you 37? I'm like 37. I'm 30, I'll be 38 on Friday. So I'm like 37 and 6. And they wouldn't and they wouldn't give you anything. No. Even with just sexual diabetes, they said I'm still diet controlled. If you were on insulin, we could do it at 38, but you're not. And my doctor that I work for is very by the book. Okay. Um, she's like, I don't want to get sued. So it's very by the book. Okay. So yeah. Um, I stall out at four centimeters and I'm just not dilating. I was stuck at like a four for like a day and a half.

SPEAKER_03 47:21

No, you were not.

SPEAKER_01 47:23

I was, and I was terrified to go home because I was like, Well, I'm not in any pain, but like, what if something happens? I live 45 minutes away. Yeah. And so I like begged her. I was like, please don't send me home. And she's like, Oh, you're not going anywhere. Okay, fine. Um, but at this point, like, I want to say by like Friday, I'm getting so emotional. I'm like, what am I doing wrong? Like, I was walking the halls, I was I was doing everything. She she was cozy. Yes.

SPEAKER_03 47:55

He just she changed her mind.

unknown 47:58

She did.

SPEAKER_01 47:58

She did. Like, nah. Yes. So intended parents had their own room as well. So we had two different rooms. The whole time they had their own room. The whole time. Super nice. So the way the way it works at the hospital that I worked for, um, we labor and deliver and stay for postpartum in the same room. And your room is your baby's room. So they don't have a nursery, like they do everything there. If you have a boy, like they take them for their all their stuff. Yeah. Um, but like you stay there. So like they just did like me under me, and then they put their room under the baby. Okay. So um they had their their room the whole time. So they were just kind of going back and forth, taking breaks between like their room, my room. Anytime like the doctors or nurses would come in, they would go get my parents and they would bring them to the room with them. I told them that was fine. So um, they wanted to be there. And my intended mom like held my hand for my epidural and all of that. My husband about passed out when we had my son. So I was like, You're not gonna be in the room. So she was there. Um, she got a little lightheaded and had to sit down at the end, but it was like after they were done.

unknown 49:08

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 49:09

But um, so finally, it was Friday night around like 9 p.m. I asked my nurse because I had asked, I was like, Can I pump? You know, like that's that'll stimulate, like that makes you contract. I was like, Can I pump? And at first they were like, No, because that's technically induction. Like, if you're want to be technical about it, I was like, okay.

SPEAKER_03 49:30

Yeah, but it's not medication induction. This is like a natural induction. If I was at home, people I'd be doing this. Like, exactly.

unknown 49:37

Close.

SPEAKER_01 49:38

I kept telling, I kept telling all of them. I was like, just drop some cytotech on the floor, like I know what to do with it.

SPEAKER_02 49:44

Oh my gosh, so funny.

After Birth: Hurt Feelings And Missed Moments

SPEAKER_01 49:47

But so finally, my night shift nurse, I was like, I'm just gonna try again. So I asked her, I was like, hey, can I pump? Like, and she was like, Oh yeah, yeah, I'll bring you the pump, no worries. Me go girl, and so she brings me a pump. No joke, Kennedy. I pumped for maybe 15 minutes and she was like, Okay, I'm gonna check you because I hadn't been checked since like four o'clock. Okay, I pumped for like 15 minutes. She comes in, checks me, and I don't know if she was telling fib, she might have been, but I don't care. She said, You're six, we can start Pitocin. I said, Woohoo! Oh my gosh. That was like Friday night at 9 p.m. We start Pitocin, um, go to sleep. Uh I I did not have any bad contractions on Pitocin. Like everybody says it's awful, and I did not have any a bad experience on it.

SPEAKER_03 50:37

Um Yeah, I've been on Pitocin. It's it's a hit and miss, I think, for people. Because a lot of the times it can be a really intense contraction. But I had intense ones, but I didn't care. I knew that puppy was working, so pump it up.

SPEAKER_01 50:52

I I I honestly was I was starting to starting to feel them, but like they were not bad. Um, so they came and the anesthesiologists are on call. So, you know, when they're there, you need to get them. And so 5 a.m. She comes in and she's like, hey, anesthesia's here. Do you want to get your epidural while they're here? I was like, sure, let's go ahead. So I got my epidural, um, went all day the next day. I'm like six and a half, seven. Stopped again.

SPEAKER_03 51:23

I was like, you gotta be kidding me. You just gotta keep pumping.

SPEAKER_01 51:28

Oh, so like I said, so frustrated. Oh, that is frustrated. Um, they're not. Nope. And they're not willing to break it. Um, so they had like checked me and she so like they checked baby by station, so like where they're at in your pelvis. She was too high in my pelvis for them to safely break my water. Oh, they were afraid the cord was gonna come out. So, and then that's an emergency C-section.

SPEAKER_03 51:56

Yes, it is. All right, we'll hold off.

SPEAKER_01 51:59

So they come and check me, and they're putting me in all kinds of different positions to try to get her to like come down, and you know, I'm I'm literally like head touching the my feet, like bent backwards, like it was crazy.

SPEAKER_02 52:11

Oh no.

SPEAKER_01 52:13

So we go through everything, they do an ultrasound, she's face up, and so that's why.

SPEAKER_03 52:19

Oh no, she got stuck.

SPEAKER_01 52:20

She's she's stuck, yeah. Yeah, so she's face up it won't turn around, so her head's not like on my cervix like it should be. Right. And so they put me in different positions to try to get her to flip around, so she flips finally. Oh, they didn't flip her. No, no, they didn't flip her, but they like put me in different positions to encourage her to flip. To do it on her own. What a nice option for you. Even on an epidural. Yeah, yeah. They just positioned me with all kinds of pillows and the peanut ball. And yeah, it was very weird, actually.

SPEAKER_03 52:52

I'm very jealous of you. I my my second surrogate paid, that was my third delivery. The doctor comes in and is like, why is she not here yet? I'm like, how rude, I don't know. And he's like, Oh, that's why and puts elbow deep, turns her around. And I'm like, Cool, thank god I have an epidural, but still kind of elbow.

SPEAKER_01 53:10

Well, see, my water was my water wasn't broke yet, so maybe that's why.

SPEAKER_03 53:13

Oh, so they couldn't do that. That's right. Yeah, yeah. That's right. Yeah, okay, that makes sense. So yeah. Wait, they still couldn't break it then, even though they realized that she was based up.

SPEAKER_01 53:26

She was she was still too high up. They were just afraid to do it. Oh, this girl just wants to be so dramatic. A diva. A diva. Big diva. So they we finally get this game plan because I wanted the specific doctor to deliver because I worked with her and I was hesitant about some of the hospitalists, and so we were just like, okay, so finally it gets to a point where I'm just frustrated. I'm like, we need to do this. Um, the hospital I worked for was Seventh-day Adventist, and so was my doctor, and it was Saturday, and she was at church. So we were literally on the verge of getting another doctor because I was like, I have got to have this baby, like I'm over this. Yeah. And so the nurse was like, Well, let me check you. We can talk to this other doctor. I'm almost certain I can get him to break your water. I was like, let's do it. Okay. So we get my intended parents in the room, and the she checks me, and my water breaks. So here I am. And then let me also tell you so my mom and dad had been at the hospital, like my actual parents, and then my husband had been at the hospital. My husband had left because he didn't have any clothes with him or anything like that, because this wasn't planned. Right. And we had to like rush out child care and stuff. So he went home to like get stuff together and he was just gonna chill for a little bit because nothing has been happening. And then my mom and dad left to get food. So, like, it's just me and the intended parents. Okay. So the first thing that goes through my brain is, oh my gosh, you guys said that the cord could come out and I would have an emergency C-section. I am like freaking out. You don't have anybody there to advocate for you. No, no, and I'm like by myself, and I'm like, oh my gosh. So um my water's broken. There was two nurses in there because they were like tag team and they were like, okay, let's figure out what to do.

SPEAKER_04 55:18

Okay.

Seeking Closure, Limited Contact, Six-Month Update

SPEAKER_01 55:18

Um, one of the nurses like starts grabbing towels, and my intended parents are clueless, they have no idea what's going on. And I reach over, grab my phone, and I texted my husband. I said, Water broke, come now. That's the exact words. Oh no. And like I said, we're 45 minutes away. Oh no. I'm like in my head, I'm freaking out. So they kind of like calm down a little bit, and I'm like, okay, everything's fine. So then I like tell my intended parents, like, my water just broke, and they're like, Yay! Like they're so excited. Yeah. Um, and then we had a whole thing worked out where like she was gonna be wearing a hospital gown, and I didn't get like my son on me. He had the cord raptor on his neck, and so I definitely didn't want that with my surrogate baby. Like, she was gonna go to them first thing. We had it all worked out. Get that, yep. Um, so delivery-wise, everything starts going good. Um, my doctor rushes in and she's like, Um, the her heartbeat keeps dropping. Like, we need to go ahead and like check you. We need to deliver like as soon as we can. I'm like, okay, cool. Immediately a wave of panic hits me, and I'm like, oh crap, I'm about to do this for somebody, you know, like I've been so excited. I've not really been nervous this entire time until this moment. And I just remember like I started kind of like shaking. I got those like shakes, you know, and I was like, oh my gosh. And so my mom and my husband were able to be in the room. So they're they're there at this point. Like at this point, like we're all just waiting until I get to 10. And um, it happens pretty quick. So my water broke around like one, and I had her around 3:30. In the morning or in the afternoon? No, in the afternoon. Okay. So like that went pretty quick once my water broke. That's all I needed. Yeah, super fast. So um they're just all kind of hanging around, and I'm falling asleep like mid. And so my doctor rushes in, she's like, Were you asleep? I said, Yes, I was. You're tired, it's been like two days of laboring. Yes, yes. And so um, my mom and my husband were like over here off to the side, and then I had a nurse here, and then my intended mom was on this side and she was holding my leg, and then dad was like off in the corner.

SPEAKER_02 57:30

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 57:31

Um, I had told my my mom and my husband they had clear instructions. I want pictures of this baby when she goes to her mom. Aww. And like that was like their top thing. Like, I wanted it. Okay. So my mom is actually like recording, like she wasn't supposed to be, but she's like taking little video snippets every time. Like, I have a contraction and do it. So I have all these videos and they're wonderful, like, it's just sweet. Um, but as I mentioned, like her heart rate kept dropping. So that's scary. Heart rate dropped. Um, and what it was is she got stuck in my pelvis. Okay. So I had what's called a shoulder dystocia, and um, that's where baby gets stuck and they can't pass the shoulder through the shoulder. Yep. Um, so in the videos, you can see my nurse is literally like jumping on top of me, like pushing, trying to get her out. Um, yes. And baby nurse that was there. Um, she was a nurse practitioner that actually worked in our office. And so, like, I had a really close relationship with her as well. And I said, I want you to be in the room, like you have to be there. And so she was baby nurse, but she was also like in telling my intended mom, like, hey, this is what's going on, this is what's happening, like all the things. So it was so nice. Mm-hmm. It was wonderful. Yeah. Um, I ended up with an epesiotomy where they cut you. No, what? Yes, yes. Why? Well, because she was stuck and wasn't coming out, like it was it was it was bad. It was pretty bad. Um, and I had the epidural, so I couldn't really get into a different position at that time. No, so she told um mine to the mom, she was like, Hey, like you want to look away. And so, like, even with the epidural, like I still felt it a little bit. Of course you did. Um, so that was rough. Oh god. And so Was it all the way to Amber? Was it like no, no, thankfully not. Yeah, it wasn't all the way. It's still horrible, but okay. Yes, yes. Um, so we are finally getting the baby out. Yeah. And my my friend Darlene was like, Hey, like, you're not gonna get the baby. Like, this plan is not gonna go because the baby's not breathing, like, baby's gotta go to the warmer as soon as possible. Right.

SPEAKER_03 59:52

Okay.

A New Match And Clear Boundaries

SPEAKER_01 59:52

Um, so she was kind of telling her, like, we're not gonna do the plan, all that. So baby's born, and my intended dad like rushes over, cuts the cord, um, and he's like, phone in hand, you know. And so they like take her over. Um, she's not crying at first. Okay, then she starts crying. And so this is also where things kind of my my feelings got hurt a little bit at this point. Okay. Obviously, like I 100% know the baby is their number one priority, like they're not gonna stay there with me, of course. I didn't expect that.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:25

Right.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:26

Um, so they go to their baby. Okay. She turns out she's fine, no issues, all all's good. Um, then they come back over and she sits down in a wheelchair and they're gonna wheel them to their room because you can't just carry the baby. So she's gonna start skin to skin. Okay. But before they left my room, they said they did not say a word to me.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:49

Okay, hold on. So not even after babies not even after babies born, like nothing. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing really?

SPEAKER_01 1:01:01

Nothing. Um and my mom's good for you.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:06

I don't like that.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:07

Yeah, my mom and my husband, like I said, were like there and they were like over to the side. And so once my mom could get over, she like came over and my husband did as well because they're like sewing me up and all the things. Um, and my husband was actually upset with it too, and he doesn't get upset, like he's like, I don't know.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:23

Well, his wife just went through something big and traumatic. I mean, that you got into peasy out of me, and it was a very long labor.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:31

And I mean And that's not it. That's not it. So they go to their room. Okay. Um, everything happens with me. Like I get cleaned up, they take my epidural out, I get my food finally.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:43

Oh, love that food. Um, have you not eaten for two days?

SPEAKER_01 1:01:47

Uh, I did. I ate like on Thursday afternoon, I believe. Maybe, maybe Friday morning sometime. I don't remember. I don't I have been eating popsicles. Oh my gosh! Yeah, yes, you need a burger. So I had girl, I had a um what's called a killer potato. Okay, and that is a big baked potato with like barbecue, uh barbecue chicken and like cheese and all the things. It was so not healthy. So oh my gosh, that sounds so good right now. Um, and I had a donut while they took my girl out. Like that was the very first thing I had. My mom had them there waiting for me.

unknown 1:02:25

I love that.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:26

Good. Treat yourself. Okay, okay. So I'm sorry, we've got off topic.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:29

You're fine. So you you have your meal.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:31

So I'm eating my meal, and Samantha, my coordinator texted me and she was like, Oh my gosh, she's great. Like, I'm so glad you're doing good. Like, she's beautiful. Immediately I said, You've seen her. Because at this point, my intended parents have still I haven't seen them. I haven't, they didn't even send me a picture. They sent my coordinator a picture before they sent me a picture.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:56

I literally just birthed your baby. I don't get that. That's a very weird. They were chill with you this whole time while you're laboring. Yes, they were chill with you after the whole diabetes situation. Like it got better.

Working At An Agency: Inside The Process

SPEAKER_01 1:03:11

Okay. So at one point, so we had talked originally about me coming to their baby shower. Um, and that was like, cool, cool, cool. Like, yeah, I'll come. And then it got pushed to where like it was past my travel, like when I couldn't travel. So then she was like, Hey, like, we'd love to have you on Zoom. We want you to meet all of our friends and family, let them see the bump, all the things. I'm like, okay, cool. And then, like, two weeks before, I get a text from her and she said, Hey, so the time got pushed back for the baby shower and it's gonna be late where you live. It was gonna be like nine o'clock where I live. And she was like, So we're just not gonna do Zoom. And I was like 32, I was like 32 weeks at that point. So, like, and I I see the best in everyone too. And so, like, I'm just over here like, oh yeah, things are great, like it's fine, and like my coworkers are like, that's not cool.

SPEAKER_03 1:04:08

No, I hate to put it out there, but it to me, it it is especially with the delivery and everything, like when you add it all together, I could understand maybe one thing and then like rectifying it later, but like all of that together is kind of a slap in the face, like a little disrespectful.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:27

Mm-hmm. Like, um, and then so like uh they finally like told told my nurse like they were ready to like come and see me and wanted to know if I wanted to come to their room or if they could come to my room and like ask what I preferred. Okay, and my nurse, my nurse like was aware of the situation, like I had told her everything, and she was like, Oh no, you guys could come to her. Like she just had a baby, like you come to her for sure. So they come to my room. Yes, so they come to my room, and they had like a card for me and they got me like a little necklace. Um sweet, yeah, it was nice. Um, I intentionally made sure like I wanted to like hug them first. Like, okay, so I hugged both of them. Of course, I'm like emotional, I'm crying, I'm like, oh my gosh, I'm so happy for you guys, you know, all the things. And by the way, Samantha had sent me the picture at this point as well. Like she immediately texted me the picture when when I saw it. But it should have come from them. It should have, yeah, it should have. Um, so they get the baby and I get to hold her. Um, and you know, something big from your podcast is like the whole hour time with the baby. And I I told them about that. That contradictable thing that we put out there in the world that everybody hates us for. I talked to them about that just to like ask like, hey, are you open to this? Like you guys can grab something to eat, and like I'll just like it doesn't have to be the same day, like that whole thing, you know. I didn't care. Um, they were so open to. To it and then the time comes. No. And I'm holding her. I held her for like five minutes and just pretty much long enough to get a picture with them. And she was kind of hovering over me, like you know, and it I just I did not feel comfortable. And so I was just like, here you go, you can have her back. Like, yeah, and then they stayed in town for like a couple days afterwards. Um, she was in the hospital for a little bit because because of my gestational diabetes, she had to have an insulin drip. Okay. Um, her body wasn't like regulating her sugar the way it should have. Okay. And so um they I I left the hospital on Sunday, so the next day. And then my son did get to come and meet her. I was gonna say, okay. But it wasn't like what I was expecting, like I was wanting like them to be holding her. Like I didn't necessarily want him to hold her, but like I wanted him to see them, like see them all together.

SPEAKER_03 1:06:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:57

Um, but he just got to look in the bassinet. So my husband came. Um, my mom never once laid eyes on her, which really she was there for the transfer, she was there for the delivery, like never once saw her in person. Other than like the quick, like you're you know, out and you know.

SPEAKER_03 1:07:16

Oh wow, poor mama. That's not yeah, mama was there for a lot of it.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:22

She was, she was, and and that was something too. My mom was like, Well, you're our family now, like, yeah, this is a whole like a whole thing, and and no, it's not that way. Oh, Amber, I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_03 1:07:34

It's okay, it's okay. We're like no, we're we're making it. It's hard it's hard to the initial the initial process of that, like mental process of that, that's why we harped on it so much. And it's not like we're not saying that that's absolutely what everybody has to do, but it's it doesn't have to be an hour, maybe 15 minutes, maybe 30 minutes.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:54

Yes, just don't hover over me.

Practical Advice For First-Time Surrogates

SPEAKER_03 1:07:56

And I think and that, and that's the big thing, that's why we say alone, because it's and while I understand, because I've talked to intended parents that have had very strong views on it, and while I understand that and I completely respect them 100%, I get it. You've waited however many years to have your baby 100%. I'm just saying you trusted me for nine months and you weren't hovering over me, and I got your baby here safely. All I want is 10, 15 minutes, 30 minutes, however much time you're comfortable with, so that way me and my family can have closure without being observed. Like it's the it's very awkward, especially when you have a little, because my son was little too. I it's to me, it was really important to have that full closure. Hey, look what you helped mommy do. Look at the baby. It's so important for kids, I think. But that's my spiel. Yes, yeah. So I am sorry.

SPEAKER_01 1:08:52

Yeah, yeah. So they actually, like I said, stayed in town for a few days before they went home. Okay. Um, and a friend of mine had a lot of breast milk left over from when she was pregnant. Um, I didn't plan on like pumping full term, and so I just did not. Um, but we had given them a bunch of milk. Um, and then my husband also was able to get dry ice from his work, and they were gonna use the dry ice, got going home. So I was going to meet them. So, like they were staying where my hospital was, so 45 minutes away from me. Okay. And the Nintendo dad was like, Oh, I can just like meet you like halfway and get get the dry ice. I'm like, no, it's okay, I'll bring it to you. Yeah, like you guys are I I just played it off, like you guys are busy packing, like I'll just bring it to you. But I really wanted to see them and I wanted to see them. And the baby, yeah. Um, so I get there, they invite me into their B. I go in, and they're like, Oh, she's upstairs to sleep. So finally before I leave, I was like, I I know finally before I leave, because at this point, also I've never seen her hands, I've never seen her feet. And it's like, you wanna you wanna see that? Like, that was inside of me, you know? Like it's the mental process of it.

SPEAKER_03 1:10:18

Like, I don't think some people understand that. Like, we don't want to keep your baby. That's not what this is. I don't want your baby. I want to, I want my mind to be able to process everything that happened, see the baby, and be like, okay, cool, little one, we did it. Like, go us and then bye. Like, go have a merry, merry little life.

SPEAKER_01 1:10:44

So before I left, I was like, you know, hey, like whenever she's not swaddled up, you know, can you just send me a picture of like her hands and feet? Like, I would like to see her little details, you know. Yeah, um, her ears, you know, all the things because during this whole process, also, mind you, I work in an OB office. I have access to an ultrasound machine the whole eight hours I'm at work.

SPEAKER_04 1:11:04

You're right.

Closing Thanks, Contacts, And Sponsors

SPEAKER_01 1:11:05

So I have seen this baby, okay? Yeah. Um, and so she was like, Oh, okay, well, we can go upstairs and see if maybe like her hands out of her swaddle. And I was like, Okay, cool. So we go up and like I just got to look at her. That's it. Wow. So she sent me a couple of pictures once they got home. Um, and then I talked to them last when I was actually leaving for my cruise, and I haven't talked to them since. But uh, we are friends on Facebook, so I've seen like update pictures. She's actually six months old yesterday. Like as of yesterday. So um, I've just been like seeing her from a distance, I guess. So I'm really, I'm really sorry. Like I and I texted them on Thanksgiving and said, you know, happy Thanksgiving. Hope you guys have had a great day. Like, I've just been trying to give them space, but the answer I got back was thanks, you two. So journey number two. We know what we want. We know what we want. Yeah, I am matched with a wonderful couple in Orlando. Yay! Yes, yes. Uh, I have cream with the crop because like I'm here, like I can see everybody. Yeah, dreams. Um, so they kind of like stood out to me and I kept trying to like give them to other people and they just kept coming back. Like, and I was like, okay, it's it's Destin, it's me. Um, so I was very open with them about how I was treated and what I'm looking for, and you know, all of that. And they are a hundred percent, they seem very I'm I'm I'm in records right now. I'm I'm waiting on their clinic to approve my records, but um, like they're very sweet and they're just very understanding and definitely so good.

SPEAKER_03 1:12:56

I'm so glad to hear that. I really hope you have I've heard somebody say this in the past a redemption journey. Yes, not that this one, not that this one was super horrible, but you didn't get the closure in the ending that you had envisioned, and so I really hope that you get that this time.

SPEAKER_01 1:13:14

Definitely, definitely. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_03 1:13:17

Wow, we covered a lot. Um I know, I know. I'm like, oh my gosh. No, no, okay, but we'll we'll we'll uh we'll tap on this real quick. But now you work for the agency that you were with, yes? Yes, yes.

SPEAKER_01 1:13:31

Exceptional fertility.

SPEAKER_03 1:13:33

Ah that's amazing. How um how is it? How's it going? What do you do? What's your role?

SPEAKER_01 1:13:39

I love it. I love it. So I'm a surrogacy coordinator. Um, we're a really small agency, so we have two surrogacy coordinators, uh, two egg donor coordinators. Um, one of those is part-time, and then we have two girls that are bilingual and they kind of help with both. Um, we live in a highly um Hispanic population where we're at. And so um they deal with our Spanish people. Um, and then Jennifer, which is the owner, and she helps out with everything pretty much. So we're a very small agency. Um, we're in the process of trying to grow. Um, so we're we're trying to maybe eventually get a little bit bigger. Um, but right now we're just kind of hitting all the stops, getting all the getting all the information that we can and and going from there. Um everybody's gotta start somewhere, right? Yes, yes. And it's funny because so I was texting with Samantha. Um, she ended up being my coordinator uh because she was with those intended parents. And I was like, oh my gosh, I wish I could work like part-time, doing record review or something like that, just because like I was in the the the OB field and I was like, Oh, I wish I could do that. And she's like, Well, we don't need anybody part-time, but we need somebody full-time. Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_03 1:14:51

And so did you did you leave your your MA job?

SPEAKER_01 1:14:54

So I did. I was actually hesitant. I was like, I at first I told her, like, no, like I'm not looking to leave because I love I loved my job. I was so happy. I loved everything about it. Um, and then I talked to my husband about it. I mentioned it, and he was like, Oh, well, just go interview, just see what they say. Yeah. It's like, okay, okay, cool. So I did. Um, and that was like right before Thanksgiving, I believe. And oh, so this is new. Yeah, yeah. I started here on set uh December the first. Oh my, you're like, you're fresh. Yes, yes. Um, so I came and like shadowed with Samantha a couple days and just kind of watched what she did and was telling my husband about it. And he was like, it just seems too good to be true. Like, what's the cat? What's the cat? What's when's the shoe gonna drop? Right. Oh, so um I finally got him talked into it. Uh, and so I was like, okay, I'm gonna do it. And so I put my notice in right before Thanksgiving. Um, worked my two-week notice in the day after Thanksgiving was my last day there. And I started here, like I said, on the first. So good for you. Yes, it's been wonderful. I have uh about five cases that I'm working. Like, so I just started with all the new people. Yeah. Um, and I'm just going step by step with them. Um, I've had a couple who, you know, records didn't pan out or something just didn't work or we can't work with them. Um, but I have two surrogates right now that are one is actually going for like her medical screening tomorrow. Oh, and so there's her, and then those intended parents actually have two surrogates, and they just matched their second one last week. So we're getting the ball rolling with her.

SPEAKER_02 1:16:40

How fun!

SPEAKER_01 1:16:42

Oh, that's the dream working in the office dream. Yeah, yeah. My first week I went to a transfer um in Alabama. Oh my gosh! Like, there was nothing else for me to do here, and Samantha had to go. Samantha was going. Um, the surrogate didn't have a travel companion, so um we we do that. We will travel with surrogates if they don't have a companion, also with the egg donors. Um super sweet. Mm-hmm. So um we traveled with her. It was only about three hours, so we just drove. Um, so I got to go to her her transfer. Um, I went to an appointment, I think, first, and then we went to a transfer. And then um one of the one of Samantha's surrogates didn't have a companion for her transfer. Her transfer was Saturday. Oh, oh, and so that's the one that you went. So we went up to we went she was we were in Connecticut, but we ended up like going over to New York while we were there. So that was fun.

SPEAKER_03 1:17:38

Very fun. Oh, well, good for you. See, look, everything, everything happens for a reason. Steps are steps are always in the right direction. You just might not know your destination yet.

SPEAKER_01 1:17:50

Definitely, definitely. And it's just been it's just been wonderful. Jennifer is just all around, she's a wonderful person, and I I just love her.

SPEAKER_03 1:18:00

So I we really enjoyed speaking with her. I've gosh, was it a year ago now, I think? Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:18:05

Uh it's it's been about because so I actually told Tiffany, she was the coordinator that was here. Um, I told her I was like, you guys should go do this podcast. And the next thing I know, like, here they are. I was like, oh my gosh. Oh my gosh, how funny.

SPEAKER_03 1:18:22

Yeah, they had reached out and we were like, oh my gosh, absolutely. We never turned anybody down. Anyone's got a story, come on and and share your story. We absolutely love it. We love meeting new people, love talking to people, and it's better, it's even better when they're such nice, genuine souls.

SPEAKER_01 1:18:37

So actually to update you, so Samantha did a twin journey back when you talked to her. She had done a twin journey. Right. Um, she delivered a surrogate baby in September of this of 2025, actually. Wow. Yes. So I delivered in July, she delivered in September, and then surprise, Jennifer did a surrogacy. Not uh she just delivered on uh December 23rd. Oh my gosh! Whoa, that's awesome! Now now we are all seasoned, we've all done it, we know what to tell people, right? Exactly.

SPEAKER_03 1:19:15

Yeah, you have firsthand experience.

SPEAKER_01 1:19:18

That's that's so um Samantha's working on doing it again as well. Um she's matched, and we're both at the same clinic. Our our intended parents are the same clinic. I was like, let's do it together. She said, No, we can't be off at the same time.

SPEAKER_03 1:19:33

I love that. Oh, that's true, that's true.

SPEAKER_01 1:19:36

I didn't I didn't think about that part. Um but but yeah, it's it's been great.

SPEAKER_03 1:19:42

So amazing. I love that. Do you have any advice for anybody who's starting off or looking into surrogacy?

SPEAKER_01 1:19:52

Um, definitely it's not a like like we said, it's not a fast process. Um, I actually had a surrogate recently who she applied in December and thought she was gonna be pregnant by February. Oh um, so I was like, eh, no, I'm sorry. Not around the holidays, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Definitely do the research. Um, I I tell everybody to listen to your podcast. I mean, it's it's literally the best resource, you know. And so um that's definitely a big thing. Um, do the research. Know what you want to happen. Yes. Don't be don't be so like willing to say yes to everything either.

SPEAKER_03 1:20:33

Yeah, I think it's really good to have some things that you're like, yeah, no, maybe I don't want that. I mean, if you're a person who's just like, yeah, free for all, then I mean by all means. Yes. Go ahead.

SPEAKER_01 1:20:45

We live in if you're doing it just for the money, like sure. But like if you want a genuine connection and you really want to do this to help someone for that reason, like have have an opinion. I guess is the best best thing to say, you know?

SPEAKER_03 1:20:59

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:21:00

It's it's it's definitely helpful. Yeah, don't just say, Oh, it's up to you.

SPEAKER_03 1:21:05

Yeah. We're all surrogates are definitely people pleasers, but it's okay to be like, actually, I want this from for myself. I want, I want a relationship because that's what I want, or I want the intended parents to text me, you know, every so often. Like it's yes, you got just have something that makes you feel happy.

SPEAKER_01 1:21:24

Yes, and that that's something too that like I thought I was weird. I thought because like I thought I was selfish, I guess is the best way to put it. Like, I want the attention, like I want you to want me, you know what I mean? Like, I I want to be wanted, I want to be needed, you know.

SPEAKER_03 1:21:40

Sure, well, of course. Zirk, I I don't, I mean, I'm not trying to speak for everybody, but like I think there's that little sense of like we all are like we wanna help somebody and it in a weird way, it does feel good to be like, yeah, I'm I'm appreciated. Like I am appreciated, and somebody sees that what I'm doing, I'm doing it because I'm I want to do it. I want to be, I wanna give, I wanna, you know, my heart is here, and somebody notices that. And I think that that's like a a big quality in a lot of surrogates.

SPEAKER_01 1:22:12

Yes, yes. And I definitely, it's like, I don't know, I don't know if it's bad to say, but it's like I craved the attention. No, that's not bad. Like, like I wanted to just shout it from the rooftops. Like I just loved all the the oh oh my gosh, this is great. Like, you know what I mean? Like, yeah, for sure. The recognition of it. Yes, yes, yeah. Um I don't know, but I'm not like that normally. So that's what it's that's why it's weird to me.

SPEAKER_03 1:22:38

No, but it's surrogacy is its own world, and it's just like a beautiful little niche, and it's once you find it, you don't ever want to leave it. And like it just it's just a feel-good community, which thank goodness. Yes, yes, thank goodness, yes. Oh my gosh, Amber, this has been so amazing.

SPEAKER_01 1:22:56

I know, I've I've loved it. I'm like I said, I'm so excited, totally fangirling. Oh my gosh, you're so cute. Just a normal person, he promised. Oh no, I'm here to chat whatever. Oh, I love it. I know I have you and uh and Raven. Is it Raven? I always want to say Raven. Is it Raven? Is it Rachel? Rachel. I always want to call her Raven. You're gonna her her username, it reminds me of like that's so Raven. Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_03 1:23:25

No, you're good, you're good. I know I love we I love Rachel.

SPEAKER_01 1:23:29

Raven's been here with me since day one. Oh, yeah, she'll comment like she'll comment on my stuff and I'll comment on hers occasionally.

SPEAKER_03 1:23:37

Huge supporter of everyone. I give her the credit because I am tired. I work a full-time job. I am tired at the end of the day. And I'm if I pop on and I see something, I'm like, like, like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes, yes. It's hard. I give her there for everyone all the time.

SPEAKER_01 1:23:54

Yes, she is so sweet. Um, and then she just delivered too.

SPEAKER_03 1:23:58

So she's so excited for her. Yeah. Happy for her.

SPEAKER_01 1:24:02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:24:03

Oh my gosh. Well, thank you so much. It's been wonderful speaking with you and meeting you. And my gosh, yeah, keep me posted on this on this next journey.

SPEAKER_01 1:24:12

Definitely. And um, I would love to do any of your Friday facts or anything. Oh, I'm having 100%.

SPEAKER_03 1:24:18

Yes, I will let you know. I gotta get a list together for this year. Yeah, we didn't do that many last year. Life got away from me, so I'm hoping to get back on it this year.

SPEAKER_01 1:24:28

Well, I would definitely like to talk to some of the other girls and go from there. Yeah, awesome. Sounds great.

SPEAKER_03 1:24:34

Okay, well, I will definitely be in touch.

SPEAKER_01 1:24:37

All right, thank you so much, Kennedy. And like you said, tell your mama said hi. I will. I know she says hi.

SPEAKER_03 1:24:43

Have a great night, Amber. You too. Thank you. Bye. Bye. Oh my gosh. Well, thank you so much, Amber. That was amazing. Your story is so sweet. I'm really sorry that, you know, my heart is with you because I understand parts of it very, very well. Um, but it seems like everything happens for a reason and you're healthy, baby's healthy, and now you get to go on to have a beautiful second journey. So thank you so much for sharing your story. If anyone has any questions or stories they would like to share, please feel free to reach out to us on Instagram at stop periodsit period surrogate or at our email at stop periodsitperiod surrogate at gmail.com. And this has been another episode of Stopsit Surrogate. See you next time. Bye. Before we wrap up, we want to give a huge thank you to our sponsors, the Northwest Surrogacy Center, the New York Surrogacy Center, Paying It Forward Surrogacy. Their continued support helps us share real stories that educate our community and connect families through the incredible journey of surrogacy. Thanks so much for tuning in to Stops at Surrogate, where every story matters and every journey is worth sharing. We'll see you next time.

SPEAKER_00 1:25:59

If you enjoyed this podcast, be sure to give us a like and subscribe. Also, check out the link to our YouTube channel in the description. And be sure to also check out our children's book, My Mom Has Superpowers, sold on Amazon and Etsy.