Satisfaction Factor

#28 - Finding Your Eating Persona: The Unconscious Eater

April 06, 2022 Naomi Katz & Sadie Simpson
Satisfaction Factor
#28 - Finding Your Eating Persona: The Unconscious Eater
Show Notes Transcript

This week, we're continuing our 4 episode mini-series on the eating personas with a look at The Unconscious Eater. This eating style consists of 4 subtypes: The Chaotic Eater, The Waste-Not Eater, The Refuse-Not Eater, and The Emotional Eater. In this episode we discuss: what characteristics distinguish The Unconscious Eater persona, how these eating personas can show up as stress responses & how that can actually be a useful tool, the overlaps between many of these eating personas, and how this persona benefits from things like self-care, stress management, boundaries, and planning.

You can stay up to date on all things Satisfaction Factor by following us on IG @satisfactionfactorpod!

Here's where you can get all the info about Sadie's free Intro to Intuitive Eating workshop at the Black Mountain YMCA!

Here's where you can sign up for Naomi's 1:1 Intuitive Eating coaching waitlist!

Here's where to find more info about us:
Sadie Simpson: www.sadiesimpson.com or IG @thesadiesimpson
Naomi Katz: www.happyshapes.co or IG @happyshapesnaomi

For this episode's transcript, visit: www.satisfactionfactorpod.com

Naomi Katz:

Welcome to Satisfaction Factor, the podcast where we explore how ditching diet culture makes our whole lives more satisfying. Welcome back to Satisfaction Factor. I'm Naomi Katz, an Intuitive Eating, body image, and self trust coach.

Sadie Simpson:

And I'm Sadie Simpson, a group fitness instructor, personal trainer, and Intuitive Eating counselor. If you listened to last week's episode, you've already heard we're doing a little mini series of four episodes breaking down the four eating personas, or the four eating styles, as it's outlined in the Intuitive Eating framework. So last week, we covered the careful eater, which is somebody who is overly conscious and may scrutinize their food or nutrition labels, and that type of thing. And a careful eater might be someone who others view as living a, quote unquote, healthy lifestyle, but in actuality, they tend to be very preoccupied with things like food, and nutrition, and eating. So if you haven't had a chance to listen to last week's episode, and that sounds interesting to you, be sure to check that one out. This week, we're covering the unconscious eating style, which consists of four subtypes, the chaotic eater, the refuse-not eater, the waste-not eater, and the emotional eater. And we'll get into all those details of what these subtypes are in a minute. But before diving in, it's important to recognize and remember that what we're sharing here in this episode, and within this whole series, isn't meant as a way of self judgment, or to put anyone in a box, but instead, it's more of an awareness tool. So when you're listening to this episode series, you might recognize that you may have more than one eating style, or you embody more than one eating persona, or you might also recognize that you have possibly identified with different eating styles throughout different seasons of your life. That is normal, that is okay. This is simply information for you to be able to kind of see where you may recognize some of your tendencies with these things.

Naomi Katz:

Sort of along those lines, as I've been reading through your notes for this episode, something sort of came

Sadie Simpson:

Yes. For sure. to mind. So you and I are both on like a surface level familiar with the Enneagram. You know, not necessarily like a deep dive. But I learned recently that like you have a certain Enneagram number that you are, that's like your baseline personality type, but within the Enneagram framework, in times of stress, certain numbers go to other numbers in the Enneagram when they're stressed. So like, just to sort of give you a sense of that, like I'm a nine. And when nines are in stress, they

Naomi Katz:

Like I'd say I'm usually an intuitive eater, you go to six. First of all, I find this like fascinating. But I also feel like it really applies to these eating styles and personas in a lot of ways too. know, after lots and lots of practice. And it's still just usually because that's what this actually looks like in practice. So I'm usually an intuitive eater. But if I'm unregulated, or ungrounded, or sick, or in burnout, or like not doing a good job of managing my stress, or like whatever, I tend to go to being a chaotic eater. And the more I strengthen my stress management skills, and my grounding skills, and my regulation skills, and stuff like that, the more time I spend as an intuitive eater versus a chaotic eater. I guess another way to frame this is, at some point in the past, I had posted on Instagram about how I always know when I'm like in a state of overwhelm because I burn my morning bagel. It's just like, I can't even pay attention long enough to toast my bagel without burning it. And that's like a signal for me. And actually, over- once I recognized the pattern, it's been a really helpful signal for me to like check in with what's happening, and where I'm overwhelmed, and what I can shift, and stuff like that. In retrospect, I feel like that bagel burning thing is totally a chaotic eater type of a characteristic. And I'm wondering if, like maybe we can view this stuff as how like knowing your stress eating style can work as a cue for us to like tune into what might need some attention in our lives and stuff like that.

Sadie Simpson:

Yes. Oh my gosh, I'm so glad you pointed that out because that is so true, especially with this eating style- with the unconscious eating style- because I think, specifically with these subtypes, like the chaotic eater, and the refuse-not eater, and the emotional eater, like as we're talking about this, you'll recognize that a lot of these specific eating styles or eating personas are very stress response based. Like we talked about the careful eater last week, and in my opinion, that's not necessarily reactive, as much as the unconscious eating style is reactive based on stress, or overwhelm, or different things that you just mentioned. So yes, I think as we go through these- a lot of people that I've talked to, and a lot of people that I've worked with, out of all the eating styles, yes, a lot of people may have experienced some careful eating or professional dieting, but a lot of people identify with this unconscious eating style more than anything.

Naomi Katz:

I will say, though, I think it's kind of interesting how I actually think that careful eater could fall into that stress response thing too. Where like, you go to that when you feel like things are out of control in your life. I think that that like- which we talked a little bit about last week- that- I actually think- I think it's probably a slightly more rare stress response, but I could see it being one nonetheless.

Sadie Simpson:

Okay, yes, that makes sense, for sure. So as we're going through this episode, or any of these other eating styles, and you hear something that you might want to explore more in depth, Naomi and I both take on one on one Intuitive Eating clients. And we'll put more information in the shownotes. But we just wanted to tell you all briefly a little bit about what we do and how you can reach out to us in regards to potentially working with us. If you're listening to this, and you're a person who lives in the Asheville area, I'm going to be doing some in person work through the Intuitive Eating framework with the Black Mountain YMCA. So one, I'll be taking on one on one Intuitive Eating coaching clients in person through the Y. And in May, I'm actually going to be hosting a 12 week Intuitive Eating group workshop. And I'll share more about that as the information comes out. So probably in the next week or two. And if that's something that you're interested in, come send us message on Instagram, @satisfactionfactorpod, and I can share more information about that with you.

Naomi Katz:

That is so awesome. I'm so excited that you're doing that. And I also feel like it's a shift for the Y to be doing something that's not weight loss focused. And so that's like exciting on multiple levels.

Sadie Simpson:

Yes, I'm really excited about it. This is something new, this is something the Y, or at least are local Y, hasn't tried before. So yes, bringing something from an anti diet culture lens into a place that, you know, still runs some weight loss programming- and in any gym setting, whether it's the Y or- or most gyms out in the world, there's gonna be some diet culture, weight loss based programming and messaging included. So I'm just excited to bring an alternative to that here locally.

Naomi Katz:

Yeah. And if you are not local, I offer one on one Intuitive Eating coaching remotely. Currently, I am in the process of doing some restructuring of what those one on one coaching packages look like. So I'm not actually taking on new clients, right this second. But if it's something that you are interested in exploring, I do have a waitlist that I've opened up for folks who want to get the information about what those new packages look like as soon as that is available. So I will be sure to put that link for the waitlist in our show notes. But also, you can always reach out @satisfactionfactorpod if you have any specific questions.

Sadie Simpson:

So let's talk about the unconscious eater. So some broad characteristics of this eating style are that unconscious eaters are often multitaskers. They may eat while they're working, or driving, or doing a million other things. Unconscious eaters are often busy in general. They might feel kind of chaotic and just pulled in a million directions. They may struggle to find balance, and, again, life might feel kind of chaotic and overwhelming. Often I have found- and this is more anecdotal than anything, just based on conversations I've had with people who identify with this eating style- is that unconscious eaters tend to be really highly motivated in certain aspects of life, like their career, or parenting, or volunteering, or something that they devote a lot of time, and a lot of energy, and a lot of effort to, which sometimes creates chaos and stress on the eating side of things. Unconscious eaters may sacrifice physical or mental health for the sake of focusing on other things or other people. Often attunement to recognizing things like hunger and fullness, and the ability to kind of listen to your body is kind of challenging for people who identify with this eating style. Unconscious eaters struggle sometimes to feel their feelings and may use food as a distractor, or maybe as a comfort for negative emotions. And another important thing to note about the unconscious eater and some of the subtypes we'll talk about in a minute, is that people who identify with this style may have experienced food scarcity at some point in their lifetime.

Naomi Katz:

Can I just say- just like a little high level observation about that list- is my first thought when I looked at that list was, oh, so basically, it's just a person who lives in capitalism.

Sadie Simpson:

Pretty much, which we all do.

Naomi Katz:

Right. Which we all do. Exactly.

Sadie Simpson:

Yep. Great observation there. Yes.

Naomi Katz:

Which is probably one of the reasons why this eating style- why we see it as a stress response so often, is because like this is just- like, this is all of us. We are all this person. At least sometimes.

Sadie Simpson:

Yes, for sure. And if you haven't listened to our Intuitive Eating series episode about emotional eating, that might be a great supplementary episode to listen to, if you are listening to this one, you kind of want to dig a little bit deeper into the emotional eating side of things, too. So I think another thing that's important to recognize, as we begin talking about the unconscious eating style, is that unconscious eating, or really any eating style, there's nothing morally wrong or bad about it. Emotional eating is normal. Eating past fullness is normal. Eating food just because it's there, regardless of whether or not we're hungry, is normal. We'll get into some more nuance here in just a minute, but especially when we talk about the waste-not and refuse-not unconscious eating subtypes, there's a lot of privilege tied into our ability to unravel some of these unconscious eating ideas and things that we're going to talk about, especially if we have experienced some kind of food scarcity.

Naomi Katz:

Yeah, that's a- that's a really good point. I think we talked a little bit about this in one of our Intuitive Eating deep dive episodes, too, is the privilege of being able to like not eat while distracted, and like to remove the chaos from your eating experience, and stuff like that. Food scarcity is definitely a part of this. But also, so is- like eating environment can be a level of privilege. And we'll get into this a little bit later, but I also see a lot of ways these eating styles might show up with neurodiversity, and it's never like, oh, just try harder.

Sadie Simpson:

And when we break down the subtypes of the unconscious eating persona, some unconscious eaters might experience behaviors that align with all four of these subtypes that we're going to talk about, and some people might only relate to a few of these subtypes. And in fact, some of these subtypes actually kind of contradict each other. So somebody who identifies with being a chaotic eater might be so busy or preoccupied with working or whatever that they forget to eat sometimes, while a refuse-not eater, which is a different subtype of the unconscious eating persona, might find themselves constantly thinking about food, and the idea of forgetting to eat is just very foreign to them.

Naomi Katz:

That's so interesting to think about- that both of these things are unconscious. One of them leads to not eating, and one of them leads to eating more. But one of the reasons why it's so interesting to look at that contradiction, and that neither of those are necessarily like a tuned in eating experience, is because of the way diet culture would frame one of those as a really bad thing and one of those as like somewhat virtuous or good. It's a lot like how when we talk about emotional eating, and like coping with emotions with food, it's like emotional eating is heavily demonized, but dieting in order to deflect from emotions, and restricting in order to deflect from an emotion, is something that like nobody is that concerned about, that's fine.

Sadie Simpson:

So let's dive into these unconscious eating subtypes, starting with the chaotic eater. And even going back to what you said earlier, about recognizing that you might fall into this chaotic eating style during times of stress, I think that's very common, and very normal that a lot of people will also like see themselves in this eating style when we talk about it in just a second. So a chaotic eater may be someone who has an overscheduled life, or struggles with boundaries, and, again, finding balance. But for somebody who is a chaotic eater, whether that- this is like a consistent thing, or something that you may fall to during times of stress, food is often an afterthought. So just some behaviors that you might recognize if you identify with this eating style, is that you might rely on things like vending machines or fast food to kind of sustain throughout the day, because food is often an afterthought. And if you find yourself not eating enough throughout the day, and all of a sudden, you're like, oh, crap, I haven't had anything to eat, that vending machine sometimes is a savior- which is not a bad thing, it's just something to point out, to recognize that if you haven't been able to eat a meal or a snack, and you've been working from 8am to 2pm, and haven't had anything to eat, that might be a default mechanism to reach to to get some nourishment. Somebody who is a chaotic eater might also find themselves binge eating in the evenings due to not eating throughout the day. And I've seen this happen quite a bit actually, like with the people that I've worked with in Intuitive Eating coaching. They just- they get so overwhelmed, and so busy with life, and with work, that when two or three o'clock hits, they crash because they haven't had anything to eat all day, and they experience some of these like binge eating type behaviors. I don't know if that's something that you've noticed or you've recognized.

Naomi Katz:

Yeah, and I think one of the big things that is like a huge mindset shift that is hard for people, because I hear a lot of people being like, but I snack all day. And the thing is like it doesn't matter how many trips you make to the vending machine during the day, there's no chance that eating snacks from the vending machine is actually meeting your caloric needs for the entire day. Like chances are, if this is the way that you're eating, you probably are in a caloric deficit by the time you get to the evening, hence the binging. When we think that like, oh, I've been snacking all day, is a bad thing, that actually drives that binge even worse, because then we also have like guilt that we're making up for, and stuff like that.

Sadie Simpson:

Yeah. But something specific that I feel like that has been really helpful for folks in this situation is the idea of meal planning and meal prepping. And often, meal prepping has a very like diet culture feel to it. Because when we generally think of meal prepping, we're thinking of like getting containers, and putting specific macronutrient foods, and carefully portioned out things, like so you can control your portions, and your calories, and whatever. But when I say meal planning and meal prepping, I'm thinking of just doing a little bit of planning and preparation on the front end, to kind of set yourself up to have food easily and readily available during the day, so that you can eat conveniently, without feeling like you have to, you know, just snack throughout the day, and you can eat like a meal with some sustenance. And I found that that's been a really helpful thing for folks who struggle with this. But it's important to also bring in the whole kind of nuance of I'm talking about meal prepping, not in a calorie control sort of a way.

Naomi Katz:

Yeah, the way I like to frame that with people is like, in diet culture when you meal prep, it's to make sure it's not too much. In Intuitive Eating when you meal prep, it's to make sure that it's enough.

Sadie Simpson:

Oh my gosh, I freaking love that so much. I'm going to steal that and use that because that's so good.

Naomi Katz:

This is why we have these conversations.

Sadie Simpson:

Oh gosh. Well somebody who is a chaotic eater might even identify themselves as a people pleaser. Maybe they are somebody who has a hard time saying no. They prioritize things like productivity, and getting shit done, and being reliable, and doing a good job. And often this results in neglecting things like rest, or restoration, or basic self care. And one other thing to kind of note about the chaotic eater, just coming from an Intuitive Eating frame, is that a chaotic eater may struggle to recognize hunger and fullness cues.

Naomi Katz:

I just feel like I'm being called out right now.

Sadie Simpson:

Like chaos.

Naomi Katz:

No, seriously. I mean, I just- I recognize so much of this stuff in myself when I'm, you know, when I'm maxed out, and when I've have said yes to too many things, and stuff like that. And so yeah, I'm- I imagine a lot of our listeners are probably relating to this pretty heavily as well. One thing that really stood out to me, you

Sadie Simpson:

Mm-hmm. know, looking over this, is that some of this also might sound familiar to folks with ADD, or ADHD, or maybe some other kinds of neurodiversity. And by the way, we are actually going to do a whole episode on this. We are recording an episode with a special guest to speak both from some professional and from lived experience about how neurodiversity impacts the practice of Intuitive Eating, and that should be coming out, I believe, at the end of April. So stay tuned for that. But I know that pulling away from tasks, and switching gears, and multitasking, and stuff like that can be really difficult for folks with like ADD and ADHD. You know, a lot of times what happens is they'll like tunnel into a task, and like everything else is like hard to even notice. So things like hunger cues basically just don't register during those times. And that it's also, like even if they do register, it's real hard to pull away from the tasks that they're doing in order to honor those hunger cues. So just, you know, this- it's just sort of another level that's sort of important to recognize, especially for folks who might have ADD or ADHD and want to practice Intuitive Eating, to sort of recognize those things. Yes, that is so important. And I think that's another thing that a lot of people will be able to relate to. So a couple of things to try if you recognize some of these things within yourself. One of the things for chaotic eating that I like to have people do is to sort of take note of what attunement disruptors they may have in their lives, and kind of using that to direct where they might be able to make some shifts. So if you're not familiar with what I'm talking about, attuned eating means to be tuned in and aware of things like hunger, and fullness, and rational thought, and preference, and that type of thing when it comes to eating. So an attunement disrupter would be an obstacle that interferes with your ability to hear and to respond to messages your body is sending you. So when you think about removing or even just acknowledging some attunement disruptors, that's an opportunity to give yourself to help you respond to your body's cues. But in order to do that, you kind of have to identify what some of those disruptors are. So it may be that if you habitually eat while working or watching TV, that might be an opportunity to step away from work or from watching TV while eating, if you have the chance to do that. I'm not saying like all the time, every meal, every snack, every day, but just an opportunity to kind of check in and notice if that's something that you do regularly. Again, no shame, no guilt here, because I for one love sitting on the couch watching TV while I eat, so that's not necessarily something that's a bad thing, just something to pay attention to. Or again, like we just talked about, maybe preparing some meals or snacks ahead of time, or bringing enough food or snacks with you to work so you can kind of sustain yourself throughout the day without it feeling like an extra job to eat. Or recognizing other just basic self care things that you might have the opportunity to try, so like rest, or time away from screens, or time away from social media, and things like that.

Naomi Katz:

It's like we sort of touched on earlier, that like sometimes what this tells us is that it might be a good time to check in with like, where can we say no? Where might some boundaries be helpful? Are there stress management skills that we can be honing? And things like that.

Sadie Simpson:

So let's shift and talk about the waste-not eater. So this subtype of the unconscious eating style generally associates monetary value with food, which I feel like we probably all do to an extent. The waste-not eater clearly does not like to waste food. They may be a member of what we tend to refer to as the clean plate club. They may eat leftovers from others' plates so that food isn't wasted. And like, specifically, I think about kids here- like, it's really hard, like your kids eat like two bites of something, and you're like, oh, they're gonna waste all this food. So the parents tend to like have this go to of eating food off their kid's plate, so it's not wasted. And often, specifically with the waste-not eater, this type of eating persona might recognize that they regularly eat past the point of comfortable fullness, so that food isn't wasted. So another thing to note about waste-not eaters, is that folks who identify with this eating style may have experienced some sort of food scarcity. So a couple of examples might be a parent or a caregiver limiting or forbidding them from eating bad foods like candy- and when I say bad, I mean, quote unquote, bad foods like candy. Or potentially dieting, or self restriction for the sake of losing weight. Or it could be something like food insecurity, or limited access to food, due to lack of financial resources. Another example might be generational or cultural messages of you have to clean your plate, and that type of thing. So I think it's important to point out here too, that experiencing food scarcity, whether it was from a financial standpoint, or a self restriction standpoint, or any of these other things, it can have a really profound effect on your relationship and your behaviors with eating, especially when it comes to assigning monetary value to food. And a lot of times when people identify with this waste-not eating type, they specifically might have a hard time recognizing fullness signals.

Naomi Katz:

I have a question for you, as a parent and- and somebody who has done a lot of work around the postnatal experience. So you mentioned that sometimes this is like moms eating off their kid's plate, and that there's also like a connection to food scarcity. And so I'm wondering how much of the, I don't want to waste my kid's food off my plate thing, maybe is like connected to or like correlated to the food scarcity that goes along with the pressure of like getting your- your pre-baby body back, and stuff like that. Like, do you think that there's a connection to that at all?

Sadie Simpson:

Oooh. I think there's probably something there, for sure. Because it could be a scarcity thing, like not wanting to waste food, not wanting to waste money- I think there's some of that going on- but it also could be coming from a place of self restriction. And a new mom or a new parent trying to diet and to lose weight, and being very cautious and careful with the food they serve themselves, but then they see their child eating something really tasty and delicious, like chicken nuggets, or cookies, or candy, or something like that, and they'll allow themselves to eat off of their kid's plate as almost a rebellion from their careful eating based on the whole idea of trying to get their pre-baby body back.

Naomi Katz:

People I've worked with, but even just like mom friends, who are like, I literally do this when I don't even like what's on my kid's plate. Like, so it's not even necessarily- at least with the people that I've anecdotally had this- been there to experience this with- it's not even necessarily like, oh, this is a thing that I love that I won't let myself eat, but it doesn't count when I'm eating it off my kid's plate. It's more of like, just whatever's there. If it's on- if it's left on the plate, I eat it.

Sadie Simpson:

Yeah. Oh, yeah, I think that's a big part of it, too. So there are a lot of factors that come into play here.

Naomi Katz:

So interesting, the layers of these things.

Sadie Simpson:

Mm-hmm. And that's a really good segue, because when we talk about the refuse-not eater, which is the next unconscious eating subtype, a refuse-not eater is somebody who eats food just because it's there, without consideration of hunger or fullness. They may not be aware that they're eating, or how much they're eating, or what they're eating. It's just kind of something that's done without really a lot of thought and consciousness to it. So something that might be kind of triggering for somebody who is a refuse-not eater may be open candy jars on a desk, or like free meeting food at work, or just food sitting out open on a kitchen counter. And I think there tends to be a lot of overlap between the waste-not and the refuse-not eater. The waste-not eater, specifically, in my opinion, is really more focused on associating the monetary value of food waste. Whereas, the refuse-not eater still has some concerns with wasting food because they don't want to waste money, but also, there's this layer of just not being able to resist food. So kind of like what you were talking about with the moms like just eating food that they don't even like just because it's there- I think that kind of comes into this refuse-not eating style as well.

Naomi Katz:

Is refuse-not eating like maybe more of that like mindless, like autopilot type of eating? Like, I used to know somebody who referred to like, if you're sitting in front of the TV, and you're like eating- you have like a bowl of something or a bag of something- and you're just like eating it without paying any attention. They used to refer to that as the mechanical arm- like that- just like in and out- like in the bag, to your mouth, and just without any kind of attunement whatsoever, or like even enjoyment, is the thing.

Sadie Simpson:

I think that's really characteristic of a refuse-not eater. It is just kind of autopilot. Food is there, I'm going to eat it, whether I like it, whether I'm hungry.

Naomi Katz:

Whereas the waste-not has like a real specific narrative to it, but the refuse-not is sort of just like- like, there isn't even really a narrative. You're just doing it.

Sadie Simpson:

Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Well, I think some other things to point out about the refuse not eating style, and how it might be reinforced in our society, is the idea of food being compensation. So I'm sure you've sort of heard or seen the memes about like, well, I'm not getting a raise this year, but my boss was throwing me a free pizza party. So it's kinda like that- like free food at work, like free pizza, or free bagels, or whatever, being offered in lieu of other benefits, such as a pay raise, or time off, or, I don't know, health insurance. And I think that's just something that's kind of reinforced in our society, that like, oh, well, I'm going to have this free food at work, because I'm not getting paid shit. So I'm just going to eat all this pizza. And it kind of is another layer into this whole conversation.

Naomi Katz:

Also, hello, employers, please stop doing that.

Sadie Simpson:

Pay the money and give them a pizza party.

Naomi Katz:

This is like maybe an overlap between the waste-not and the refuse-not also, where like both of these things kind of benefit from the concept of leftovers. Where like, okay, food waste is a legit issue, like-

Sadie Simpson:

Yes.

Naomi Katz:

-in the world. And especially in our country, I feel like. And so, you know, having values around not wanting to waste food makes perfect sense. And also buy some Tupperware. You don't have to eat it all at once in order to honor those values. Ditto for things where like the refuse-not stuff comes up on- like, when you're at a fancy- like, you're at a restaurant, and you're out to a fancy dinner, and it's like, you know, when's the next time I'm going to eat this, and I better eat it all now while I have access to it, and stuff like that. And it's like, that's what doggie bags are for. You don't have to finish everything on your plate. If anything, you get to take it home and eat it again the next day. And isn't that awesome? And so like, that's just something that like, I feel like is such an important conversation to have within both of these things. And I think it's really interesting. I think one of the reasons why- especially with the refuse-not- one of the reasons why we don't do- we don't see doggie bags or like leftovers as an option, is because of that calories don't count when- well, I'm at a restaurant, it's a special occasion, but I could never eat this two days in a row, that would be terrible for me. And it's like, why? Is it really better for you to eat to the point of being uncomfortable now than it is to just eat it twice in comfortable amounts? Just- and so, unpacking that a little probably has a lot to do with why we don't see that as a realistic solution for this.

Sadie Simpson:

Yes. Oh my gosh, yes, that's such a great point. Because often, with the whole calories don't count thing, people don't want that to overlap over the course of two days. Like that's- that even kind of goes back into the idea of cheat meals and cheat days that we talked about in the careful eater episode. And I think that's where there's some overlap here too, because like technically, you know, you can cheat for one meal, but God forbid we allow that to bleed over into two meals, or two days, or whatever. So yeah, there's there's definitely some overlap between the careful eater and the refuse-not eater in that sense, too.

Naomi Katz:

Interesting.

Sadie Simpson:

Yeah. So one last thing to think about, about the refuse-not eater, is that they may identify as people pleasers, as well. And I think we talked about this in one of the other Intuitive Eating episodes- how people pleasing shows up with refuse-not eating would be when you might eat something that you don't really want, or you don't really like, or you're not really hungry for, just so that you don't offend somebody by not eating the thing. And again, like we talked about in the other episode, that's not necessarily a bad thing. It's just something to be aware of, like all of this stuff.

Naomi Katz:

Yeah. That ultimately- I think when we talked about it last time- like, what it really comes down to is you always get the choice. Like, there might be times where being a little bit uncomfortably full is worth seeing your grandmother smile because you ate whatever it is she was trying to give you. And there might be times where it's not. Like you get to make that choice.

Sadie Simpson:

Yes. And the last subtype of the unconscious eater is the emotional eater. And we talked about this in depth in our emotional eating episode, so be sure to check that out if you haven't listened to it yet. But just to kind of re-summarize that back up, an emotional eater may be someone who uses food to cope with negative emotions. And what might be perceived as emotional eating may or may not actually be emotional eating. But I think it's important to reiterate again here that eating and emotional eating is normal. Eating provides pleasure, it provides nourishment, and it provides comfort. But often self identified emotional eaters might experience this lapse of consciousness between the first and last bite of food. They may recognize that they zone out while eating, or they might not be aware of things like taste, and texture, and satiety, and even preference. And sometimes, again, what is perceived as emotional eating might actually be the result of something else, like a lack of sleep, or a lack of rest, or lack of boundaries, or a result of stress, or chaotic eating, and forgetting to eat throughout the day. And it might not be actual emotional eating. Instead, it might just be how unconscious eating kind of manifests itself.

Naomi Katz:

Yeah, emotional eating is such a nuanced conversation, because it gets so much attention within diet culture, that every time we're eating in a way that feels a little bit out of control, or at night, or whatever, we're like, almost conditioned to say it's emotional eating. And sometimes it is. And a lot of times, it's actually not. And it's like one of these other manifestations just being called emotional eating, because it's the only language we have for it.

Sadie Simpson:

So there we have it, that is the unconscious eating style broken down into four subtypes. Next week, we'll be diving deeper into the next eating style, which is the professional dieter, so be sure to tune into that. As we wrap up, I think we always have to recognize that discussing these eating styles and working through the Intuitive Eating framework, it's not a prescriptive thing. There's not going to be a one size fits all component that applies to every single person in every single situation. This is not supposed to be another set of food rules or eating rules, or this is not supposed to make anyone feel guilty about their behaviors, or their relationship with food, or eating, or their bodies. But again, just another awareness piece that I think is really important to talk about, because like you just said, we really only hear about emotional eating. We don't hear about all of these other layers that could be discussed when describing how we're feeling, and how we're reacting, and how we're eating.

Naomi Katz:

Yeah, I feel like this theme comes up a lot in a lot of these episodes, where it's just like using accurate language for what we're experiencing, and like learning what language there is to describe our experiences. It's all- it just helps us better meet our actual needs.

Sadie Simpson:

Yeah, for sure. And again, if you're interested in diving deeper into this, if you want to explore this more in depth, be sure to reach out to us on Instagram @satisfactionfactorpod, or check out the information in our show notes, if you would like to learn more about working with us through one of our Intuitive Eating coaching programs.

Naomi Katz:

Yeah, absolutely. So Sadie, what's satisfying for you right now?

Sadie Simpson:

I am satisfied by knowing that next week is spring break, so my husband, who is a teacher, and my child, whose preschool follows like the local school systems calendar, they are both off for the week. So I'm excited, one, to have my husband home during the week to help out with things around the house. And for us just to be able to kind of get out during the day during the week, and maybe go out and ride bikes, or just, hopefully, do some things outside because, fingers crossed, the weather will be nice by then.

Naomi Katz:

Well, that sounds really nice, and fun, and like a good break from the usual routine.

Sadie Simpson:

Yes, I think we're all ready for that.

Naomi Katz:

Yeah, I'm sure. I'm sure. That's awesome.

Sadie Simpson:

What's satisfying you right now?

Naomi Katz:

I feel like it's kind of similar. But um Ben and I just booked a vacation for the beginning of the summer. And I am very satisfied because it's going to be the first time in- literally, I'm not even sure how long- where I am- I'm going to take the whole week off from everything. Like, I'm not going to see clients, I'm not going to work, I'm not going to do anything but relax for a whole week at the beginning of the summer. Like over the past, I want to say a couple of years, like even when we've gone on vacation, it's worked out to where I've still seen clients at least- even if like I did it just towards the beginning of the week, or just towards the end of the week, or something, like I've still done it. And this is, I think, the first time in a very long time that I am like fully taking a week off. So.

Sadie Simpson:

Yes, that is awesome. And something we all need to take note of and do from time to time, because sometimes you just need like the full week to step away from it all, to have fun, to get refreshed. So that's amazing.

Naomi Katz:

And we can thank my awareness of my chaotic eating habits, as well as shingles, for making me realize that it was time to do this. Yes, so the moral of the story is don't wait till it's too late. Take some time off as soon as you can. For sure.

Sadie Simpson:

Awesome. So if you liked this episode, again, be sure to come hang out with us over on Instagram, we are @satisfactionfactorpod. Let us know what you think about this episode, and if you identify with any of the eating styles that we talked about today.

Naomi Katz:

Yeah, and one other thing that you can do to support us if you feel called to do so, is to leave us a rating and a review on Apple or Spotify. I mean, you can probably leave ratings in other places, but I think those are the only two places where you can leave reviews. But doing those things helps more people find us.

Sadie Simpson:

That's all for this week. We'll talk to you next time.