8. How to Know What You Really Want

You don’t need another blueprint.

You need to remember how to listen to yourself.

In this episode, I guide you through what it really means to know what you want beyond old expectations, beyond external “shoulds,” and into your own heart, values, and vision.

This isn’t about quick clarity.

It’s about reclaiming your inner compass.

We’ll explore:

• Why confusion is a good sign
• How to access your internal answers through memory, visioning, and feeling
• A journaling framework to help you find clarity from within
• Why your purpose isn’t a job title, it’s something you feel
• How to gently act on your desires before they’re perfectly defined

Let this be your invitation to tune back into you.

Watch the video version on my YouTube channel: Healing Business Podcast with Frida Kabo

Join me for my free live webinar:
“Align, Attract, and Anchor Your Business Growth”

This is for healers, practitioners, and intuitive business owners who are ready to stop hiding and finally create a holistic online presence that truly supports you and your clients. 

Learn more and register here: www.fridakabo.com/webinar

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Transcript

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The answer is inside of you. It's not outside of you. It's not in your chart. There can be a lot of clues and insight for you there. It won't tell you the steps to take in this lifetime, in this reality here and now to make that into what you really want. Welcome to Healing Business, the podcast for healers, practitioners, and intuitive business owners who are ready for more flow, abundance, and impact. I'm your host, Frida Cabo business coach, healer and bridge builder. I'm a suite living in the bush in the far north of New Zealand, supporting clients around the world to grow businesses that truly work for them. In this space, I share conversations, practical insights, and a touch of magic to support you as you step into your next level, whatever that looks like for you. Are you ready? Let's begin. Hello, it's R KaVo here, and in this episode I want to talk about how to know what we really want. I think that's such an important subject. There are so many people out there. Wanting to tell us what we want, and that's also how we are used to have it. When we grow up, when we go to school, when we have our parents, everyone is telling us what we want, what we should do, what we are supposed to do. But when we're grown up, especially when we have our own business, we need to tune into our own answers and find out what we really want. In this episode, I want to talk about a few ways that we can do that and a few different aspects of looking at it that could help you to find out what you really want. The answer is inside of you. It's not outside of you. It's not in your chart. There can be a lot of clues and insight for you there. It won't tell you the steps to take in this lifetime, in this reality here and now to make that into. What you really want, and there's so many different aspects to it as well. What do you want for you? How do you want to live your life? What is the bigger mission, the bigger purpose? There's so many layers to what we want. We can get lost in that and start to feel like we don't have that answer because it's so muddled up. If you're confused, if you searching, that's a good thing.'cause that means you are looking for something else. Looking for something new, feeling a shift that you're going from what you thought. Right, and now there's that uncomfortable in between where you're searching for something new and being in that space is really powerful to letting that new thing emerge and letting that new thing come up in that space. Be curious. Here are some things that can help you. One thing I usually do with my clients is to really tune into before we look at what we want, where we want to go forward, is to really look back, where were you a year ago? See the change to the shift, see what's happening in a year and just see that, yeah, I've actually gotten somewhere else from where I used to be. Really tune into who you are now because sometimes we have old visions or what we thought we should be or what we are caring for others, for our parents, for our ancestors, and really seeing that we can let that go, release ourselves from that. And by seeing and looking at a year ago, we actually get proof that we are evolving, that we are changing. And then when we'll look forward, where do I want to be in five years? And we don't have to know the practicalities, but be open to whatever comes up. And if you are not driving or in any place where you have to focus, you can just close your eyes and feel into that space in five years. What comes up for you there in five years? Who are you? Do you have around you? What are you working with? Are you doing the same thing as you do now? Only more, or are you doing something totally different and same thing in 10 years? If we step out into 10 years, who are you then? Where are you? How is your life different? Like in 10 years? My teenage boys won't be home. That will be a big shift for me. There will be so many exciting things in the future. So I really think about where are you in 10 years and then step back into now.'cause it's from here. And now that we can create that reality and those visions that we want to create. But if we still don't know what we really want, that's okay. You don't have to know. That's what we are here to figure out as well. One really powerful thing is to tune into your heart. Just close your eyes again and tune into your heart. I really want, and fill in the blank, take a deep breath. What is on your heart? What is there for you? What are you really passionate about? What is that bigger mission, that bigger purpose that you're here to do? You might be very clear on that. You might have a, a inkling of an idea or you might be super focused on what you want. Only you know that and just feel into your heart. Your heart is there to support you and it knows. And a question that I use is, what is one thing that you would change in the world? If you could change one thing in the whole world, what would you change? We might think that is super big question that people come up with the same answers, but it's not. I always get different answers when I ask that question. What's on your heart may feel really obvious to you, but it's not to anyone else. It's on your heart, on your mind, your calling, because you are here to contribute with that. You don't have to do it alone. There are other people doing a lot of stuff as well. Really tune into what is really important to you. If it's important to you, if it's on your heart, it is for you. How is what you're doing today? How is that aligning to that bigger change that you want to see in the world? Because when we're connected to that bigger mission, to our future magnet, our ideal, uh, project that we want to see, the change that we want to see in the world, we can find so much magnetism there that it can draw us out.'cause. Sometimes we focus on the how to much. And this is a way of raising your vision to see if that is strong enough. It pulls you strong enough that the how will come, the how you can always figure out. And another thing that I do is, uh, to look at your perfect day, to really tune into how you want your day-to-day life to be.'cause sometimes we have those big goals and missions without really thinking about, okay, but what does that really mean? On a day-to-day basis, do I really want that or do I want to create something where my life looks like this? There's a balance there, and that's a journaling exercise that you can do as well. Just journal out your perfect day. We can have several different perfect days, but just tune into will that vision support the life that I want to live. Also, how can I make my life the way that I want to live and still create that change in the world that I want to see? Another thing that we can tune into and affect right here and right now is how you want to feel. How do you want to feel? Sometimes we think about like, when I do this, then I will be, or then I can feel this. It's the opposite. Who do I need to be to create that vision? Tune into those feeling and then stay in that resonance of I am being this, feeling this, but also taking the actions between the two. Feeling this action, feeling this action. So if you want to feel more happy, then you can just think about, okay, what makes me happy? Well, kittens can watch a small YouTube clip with kittens that will make you happier. Right. What I found is more helpful to me than aiming for happiness is aiming for meaningfulness. So what is really meaningful for me? What could I do? One thing that is meaningful, and then we can tune into those feelings. If you want to do the exercise on that, just write down seven feelings that you want to have more of and then see, okay, what makes me feel that way? And take small actions to feel that way. Yeah, we have the big vision, the change we want to see in the world. We have the life that we want to live a perfect day and the feelings that we want to have. So there's some different layers there, right? And how do we know what we really want? Well, we have to start. We have to try it. We have to test it out, especially with business. When we try things out, then we know if they are for us or not. We can just sit at home. And just be, that's not what I'm saying here. We need to get out there. We need to collect the information. We need to know what people want and find that balance between what we want to create and what they actually are talking about. We need to get out there and be in conversation. Be in connection. Yeah. So try things, then change it, then try, then change it, then try it. That's how we find out what we want, but also what works in our business. Just because we see someone else doing something, you think, oh, I have to do that. But no, you don't have to. You can do the way you want. You can tune into what you feel like. And I know sometimes we just feel like staying in the bush and staying there forever. And yeah, we can do that for a while. We can set a timer like maybe it's a weekend. I'll have that weekend, no rush. We can take a weekend to do whatever we want, or a week or a month or a year. That's totally fine too. And if that's on your heart and do that and see what you get from that and learn from that, that might be where you find your purpose. That might be where you find out what you really want. Just allow ourselves to really tune into what we want and what would happen if you actually follow that. If you pull that thread of what you want, and if you have several different things that comes up, that's totally fine too. You can decide if you want to pull one thread right now, just go one way and then you can pause the other ones or look at how you can combine them into creating something unique. That is so totally you. Alright, I feel like I've left you with questions today. I'm gonna recap them here, so if you want to journal on this or feel into this, here are the questions for today. So tune into where you were a year ago, where you are now, five years, 10 years, your vision. And the next one is, if you had one thing you wanted to change in the world, what would that be? Your ideal day, how would that look and how would you like to feel and what are you gonna start with to to experiment with today? Thank you for listening. If you enjoyed this episode, make sure to follow or subscribe so you don't miss what's next. And if you're feeling inspired, I'd love for you to share this podcast with a friend who's on the same path. You can also find me on Instagram at Frida carbo or head over to frida carbo.com to learn more about how I support healers and intuitive business owners like you. Until next time, stay grounded. Stay open, and keep trusting your magic.