Henry  0:00
Hey, look down there at the car on the Monster Dragon Ride.

Tommy  0:04
Well, that's not right. Th-th-that’s us! Wavin back at the real us!

(Upbeat intro music)  0:10

Big D  0:16
Howdy ya’ll, welcome to Mosquito Springs. I’m Big D and this here’s Bobby Ray. Grab something cold to drink from the cooler, and come on up here and sit a spell.

Bobby Ray  0:25
Hey, Big D, did you know the best way to get a zipper unstuck?

Big D  0:29
well, I hear a bar of soap works pretty good. What do you use?

Bobby Ray  0:33
Bacon grease.

Big D  0:34
Oh, Bobby Ray!

Bobby Ray  0:35
No, no. It's true. Aunt Ida got her dress zipper stuck at our family reunion last year after she finished up in the outhouse, and she was running around trying to find one of those ladies to get her zipper up, but it weren’t no use. None of ‘em could do it. So, she was half in and half out. Quite a site to see. I tell you what. Nadine told me and Albert about the problem, and I told her to go get that bacon grease can out of the kitchen. She ran back with it and we slathered it all over Aunt Ida’s back zipper. That’s right.

Then Albert grabbed his Bic lighter with that stainless steel LighterBro sleeve that he picked up at the truck stop out on I-20 with the pocketknife multi tool and bottle opener on it, and he heated up that bacon grease around the zipper and - sloop! That zipper just slipped on up like a greased pig in a one piece-bathing suit.

Big D  1:32
Now that's the craziest thing I've ever heard.

Bobby Ray  1:36
Oh, Aunt Ida was ever so happy, so much so that she gave us a whole dozen of her special deviled eggs with the Jack Daniels in it before joining up with her new boyfriend Jerry Bob. 

She looked so purty in that dress, that she had Jerry Bob following her every where. ‘Course all the dogs and cats were following her too because of her greased up zipper.  You know Jerry Bob and her went down to Tijuana and got married? And it were all thanks to bacon grease. I tell you what. 

Big D  2:10
Well, look over there. Tommy and Henry are running like they've got a bee in their drawers. 

Bobby Ray 2:14
You think something's chasing them boys?

(Kids breathing hard)  2:16

Bobby Ray  2:20
Now just slow down and tell us what happened.

Tommy and Henry  2:25
(Talking incoherently at same time)

Big D  2:33
Hold it, whoa, hush, take a deep breath. Ok. Now one at a time. What happened? You go first, Henry.

Henry  2:42
We were just at a h-h-haunted carnival!

Big D  2:44
oh, you mean that traveling carnival over in Canton?

Tommy  2:47
No, it was a REAL haunted carnival in an old park we found in Sutter’s Woods.

Henry  2:54
it was real s-s-scary!

Bobby Ray  2:56
y’all knows that’s where that haunted glow tree is doncha? 

Henry  3:00
w-we do now!

Tommy 3:02
See, we were playing space alien and the preacher man…

Henry  3:04
yeah, I was the space alien with a helmet and everything...

Tommy  3:08
...and I was the preacher man trying to convert the alien so he wouldn’t eat our toes and destroy the Earth!

Henry  3:12 
that’s when we saw the haunted glow tree glowing and ran over to see what was going on.

Tommy 3:18
 but it stopped glowing when we got to it. 

Henry 3:20
yeah, and when we got to it we smelled something really sweet

Tommy 3:24
 yea, Like pies and funnel cakes...

Henry  3:26
 ...it was coming from the other side of the bushes and the trees.

Tommy 3:30
We pushed and pulled each other through the bushes

Henry 3:32
And it was just a bunch of broken down buildings and rides on the other side, really boring, but still fun to play in

Tommy 3:40
Mostly weeds and rusty sheds.

Henry 3:43
and no funnel cakes.

Tommy 3:45
So we went to the Ticket booth 

Henry 3:47
‘cause you got to have a ticket to ride or get something to eat

Tommy 3:50
and it was all dusty and a roll of tickets was on the counter

Henry 3:54
so. I reached in the window hole and grabbed it

Tommy 3:58
Then we heard a weird laugh, kinda like on the spooky movies “wah ha ha!”

Henry 4:05
but we figured it was just the wind 

Tommy 4:08
and we ran to the first thing we saw 

Henry 4:10
It had an old sign that had fallen sideways and said “Taco Bowl”

Tommy 4:15
I wanted to throw a bowling ball at the pins. 

Henry 4:17
but the lanes were cracked and a lot of pins were broken

Tommy 4:22
and there weren’t no balls

Henry 4:24
A bunch of the pins were were knocked down, but just covered in dirt.

Tommy 4:28
and all the pins in one lane were knocked down except one, and it was really slimy 

Henry 4:36
and had moss oozing off it.

Tommy 4:39
‘course I dared Henry to lick the slimy bowling pin.

(Flashback starting) 4:43

Bobby Ray 4:45
uh, oh. Sounds like we’re having a flashback

Big D 4:49
hush, Bobby Ray. So what happened then?

(Flashback starting again) 4:51

Henry 4:54
you lick it.

Tommy 4:55
No you lick it.

Henry 4:56
no you lick it. I double dare you.

Tommy 4:57
No you, lick it. I DOUBLE DOG DARE you.

Henry 5:02
Uhh. OKaaaaay. Why’d you have to double dog dare me?

Tommy 5:07
you sit right there in front of the slimy bowling pin.

Henry 5:10
only if you sit right next to me. I’m not going to do this by myself.

Tommy 5:13
Ewww.

Tommy 5:17
now lick the pin. You promised.

Henry 5:20
blech!

Tommy 5:21
It’s a double dog dare and you said yes.”

Henry 5:26
I know. Here goes nothing.

Tommy 5:30
Just close your eyes and it won’t be so bad.  

Henry 5:34
ewwww. It smells really bad.

Tommy 5:38
ok. Just a little bit more. You’re tongue’s almost there.

Henry 5:41
ahhhhhh … ahhhhhh...ahhhhh...ssssluuuurp

Tommy and Henry 5:50
ewwwww

Henry 5:52
(spitting goo off tongue)

Tommy 5:56
(laughing) see, that wasn’t so bad.

Henry 5:58
not bad?! It tasted like your mom’s Tuesday night Fishloaf.

Henry and Tommy 6:03
ewwwww!

Tommy 6:06
hey, Some of the slime got on the ticket roll and it’s glowing!

Henry 6:09
wow!

Tommy 6:11
awww, it stopped.

Henry 6:13
that’s Ok, let’s play carnival and get some cotton candy over there at the cotton candy booth.

Tommy 6:18
OK. That’d be fun.

Henry 6:20
(Henry making cotton candy machine sounds.)

Tommy 6:25
not yet! You have to give them a ticket first.

Henry 6:28
oh, yeah! I forgot. 

(Ticket tearing. Magic sound. Cotton Candy machine whirring.) 6:30

Tommy 6:32
the ticket you tore off glowed!

Henry 6:34
and the cotton candy machine is really going!

Tommy 6:37
And the booth is back together again 

Henry 6:43
and it’s got lights and everything. 

Tommy 6:46
Oooh, grab a cone. They already have cotton candy on it. Mine is blue!

Henry 6:50
mine is swirly blue and pink! And it tastes so good!

Tommy 6:57
the ticket must have been magic and brought it to life.

Henry 7:01
so all we have to do is look at something and tear off a ticket to get it to work?

Tommy 7:08
let’s try something else!

Henry 7:10
how bout the bumper cars!?

Tommy 7:12
quick! Tear off a ticket!

(Sound of ticket tearing.) 7:14

(Music - Chicken Truck Race by Heyday Highway) 7:15

Henry and Tommy 7:18
It worked! (laughing and giggling.) 

Henry 7:19
I’ll take the blue car!

Tommy 7:22
the green car is mine!

(cars running across metal floor) 7:24

Tommy 7:27
hah! Missed me!

(Crash!)  7:32

Henry 7:34
 got you! 

Tommy 7:36
hey, that red car is coming at us!!!

Henry 7:39
a big rabbit with antlers is driving it!

Tommy 7:42
must be a kid in a jackarope that costume. 

Henry 7:45
I wonder where he got it?

Tommy 7:46
look out!!!

(red car crashing into Henry’s car)  7:49

Henry 7:51
ooof! That was a good one, but you won’t get me next time, rabbit!

Tommy 7:56
ha ha, he got you good!

(Sounds of bumper cars wizzing around) 7:59

Tommy 8:00
here he comes again. Dodge him!

(Crash) 8:05

Henry 8:06
ahhhh! He got me again! And now my car won’t go!

Tommy 8:11
get out of your car before he comes back! Get in!

Henry 8:16
go, go, go!

Tommy 8:19
here he comes!!!

Henry 8:21
hurry! Drive to the entrance! he’s almost got us!

(Wild laughing from Jackalope Boy)  8:24

(bumper car wizzing past) 8:25

Henry 8:27
stop the car and lets get out of here

(Footsteps running in gravel)  8:30

Tommy 8:31
boy, he was really good! 

Henry 8:33
yea, a little TOO good!

Henry 8:36
let’s ride the rocket coaster!

Tommy 8:38
hey we’re not first in line, I think I saw that Jacky rabbit run in there. 

Henry 8:43
quick, tear the ticket!

(Ticket tearing) 8:44

(Rocket Coaster Music starts up) 8:45

Tommy 8:46
it’s running and all lit up! 

Henry 8:50
wow! Let’s grab the front seat on the first car!

(Car bar locks into place) 8:55

Tommy 8:57
we’re leaving the station!

(Clicking sound of cars going up hill) 9:00

Henry 9:01
it’s a really tall hill

Tommy 9:09
we’re at the top!

Henry 9:11
here we go!

Henry and Tommy 9:19
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!

Tommy and Henry 9:23
( laughing, screaming, cars clattering)

Tommy 9:56
there’s two tracks here.

Henry 9:59
there’s that rabbit again and he switched us to this new track!

Tommy 10:05
wait, where’s it taking us?

Henry 10:07
up that launch tower!

Tommy 10.10
where’d that come from?!

Jackalope boy 10:14
(maniacal laughter)

Henry 10:16
hey, look down at the car in the Monster Dragon Ride!

Tommy 10:20
it’s us! Waving back at the real us!

Henry 10:25
You mean there’s two of us?!

Jackalope boy 10:28
(maniacal laughter)

Launch control 10:34
 3-2-1- blastoff!

(Rocket blast) 10:38

Henry and Tommy 10:40
ahhhhhh!!!

Tommy 10:44
Hey, you poured your warm coke on me, Henry!

Henry 10:47
That’s not coke!

Tommy and Henry 10:51
ewwww!

Henry 10:54
the engine stopped!

Tommy 10:56
and we’re falling!

Tommy and Henry 10:58
ahhhhhhhhhhh!

(parachute popping open) 11:01

Henry 11:03
it’s a parachute!

Tommy 11:07
This is really cool

Henry 11:09
Look at all you can see up here.

Tommy 11:12
hey, looks like we’re gonna land in front of the Monster Dragon Ride!

Henry 11:15
look at the Cyclops and other big monsters on top of the ride!

Tommy 11:20
the ground is coming up very fast!

Tommy and Henry 11:23
oof!

Tommy 11:25
where’d our doubles go?

Henry 11:27
hey, there we go into the ride!

Tommy 11:29
let’s follow them. Tear the ticket and let’s jump into the next dragon car!

(Ticket ripping) 11:32

(Spooky music by Lucille Green) 11:34

Tommy 11:35
pull down the lap bar. The ride’s starting.

Henry 11:41
here we go!

Witch: 11:43
Cackling

Henry 11:45
Look out for the witch!

Tommy 11:50
ahh! It’s Frankenstein!

Frankenstein monster 11:52
Mwaaaaaaa

Ghouls 11:53
Blah, blah, wahahaha!

Henry 11:57
look at the zombies popping out of the graves

Zombies 12:01
moan! Moan! Waaah!

Tommy 12:04
They’re getting closer!

Zombies 12:08
Growl!

Henry 12:09
he almost got me!

Tommy 12:13
There’s the bunny kid laughing and waving again!

Henry 12:17
we’re heading for that huge Cyclops head

Tommy 12:24
smoke’s coming out of his mouth and he’s chomping his big teeth!

Cyclops head 12:26
Chomping teeth, Maniacal laughter

Henry 12:28
 and we’re heading right into it!

Tommy and Henry 12:32
ahhhhhhh!

(Accelerating whir) 12:34

Tommy and Henry 12:38
Waaaah! oof! 

Henry 12:41
how’d we get back out in the trees?!

Tommy 12:45
and that carnival is all gone now.

(flashback ends) 12:48

Henry 12:50
And then we ran as fast as we can right to here, Mr. Big D

Big D 12:54
that ghost carnival sounds really scary!

Henry 12:57
it really was!

Tommy 12:59
but it was mostly fun!

Henry 13:01
yea! I wanna go again!

Bobby Ray 13:03
I can’t believe y’all got to see that there Glowing Tree and the Texas Jackalope Boy!

Henry 13:09
you mean he’s real?

Bobby Ray 13:11
that’s right.

Big D 13:13
Oh, Lord! That was quite an adventure, boys. You’ll have to take us with you y’all next time ya’ll go.

Henry 13:19
it’s a deal!

Bobby Ray 13:21
today’s episode is brought to you by Ada’s Avocado and Wheat Bran Biscuits. If you’re feeling pooped, maybe it’s cause you need to. Ada’s Avacado and Wheat Bran Biscuits. Keeping you regular for 13 years, so grab a batch to go.

Big D 13:36
well that was quite and adventure we had today, and we sure are  glad we could share it with you. Be sure to tap that subscribe button, leave us a comment, and tell all your friends where we’re at. See y’all next time!

Announcer 13:48
Mosquito Springs and it’s characters were created and performed by Michael Sessums. Ta!

(Outtro banjo music) 13:57