Shoutout Atlanta

Meet Sarah Trammell | Musician & Salon Owner

• ShoutoutAtlanta Staff • Season 1 • Episode 1

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ShoutoutATL: [00:00:00] Alright. Welcome to the Shoutout Atlanta podcast. We hope it will become a part of your daily routine because in just 15 minutes a day, you'll learn two life lessons, one for your personal life and one for your professional life. From some of the brightest, most inspiring entrepreneurs, artists and creatives in town.

All right, everyone. We are so excited to introduce you to a talented musician and salon owners. She goes by Sarah Ray and she's an independent musician in Atlanta working to transition into a full-time music career. The 2026. Put a lot of things into perspective for her. And so she decided she wanted to be a business owner and now she owns a salon, but music is definitely her first love and she's hardworking.

She achieves what she puts her mind to. And I think there's just so much that we can all learn from [00:01:00] Sarah. And so with no further ado, Sarah, this podcast is all about us getting out of the way. Giving you an uninterrupted platform to share your story and the lessons you've learned along the way, um, both personal and professional.

So let's start with your story and how you got to where you are today. Hey, thank you so much for this opportunity to collaborate with shout out of Atlanta and be a part of your podcast. Um, so my story kind of weaves in and out of different elements in life and a lot of trial and error, a lot of different things.

Sarah: Have landed me as the person that I am today. I started singing when I was eight years old and I was also professionally and classically trained on the piano. I started in a church choir. My family was, um, very Christian and. [00:02:00] I was put in a church choir when I was about eight and just kind of fell in love with singing and music.

I mean, I would think in the shower I would sing in the morning. I would think at night I was always referred to you. I was a little songbird and for a long time, it was not that great.

I know about as good as a, as a young eight year old can sing. I guess I could carry a tune for sure, but I, I just loved absolutely thinking at the top of my lungs when, when everybody was looking and it didn't really matter to me, you know, with that childhood innocence and, and that grew into, um, a life style of chasing after singing.

I don't know how else to describe it. As I fell in love at eight, you know, I didn't know that I [00:03:00] was in love. I didn't really understand the concept of love at eight, but that's what it was. And music has always been my first love and will always be my love. Yeah. Has I progressed into grade school and high school and college.

I, I went in and out of all these different kinds of zones, I played the flute for four years. I tried out jazz band. I was in theater. I was in dance choir, um, which, uh, was called gold company in my high school. It basically the, the. Version of my high school and from a very young age was going in and out of bars.

Um, I always had composition books with me. I always kept ways to record how I was feeling when I was feeling it and what I was feeling. I always tell people it doesn't make a lot of sense. But I have interactions with someone and, you know, every interaction is [00:04:00] an energetic exchange between two people or two things.

And I, I just hear notes, you know, I hear notes, people claim they can see auras people claim that they can feel your energy. I see notes. And I know that sounds really odd, but. A lot of my music, even compositions that still sit in a composition book are 100%. And Holly based off of my interactions with people or situations where music just relentlessly played in my head over and over and over again, until I sat down at a composition keyboard and that led into a pursuit in college where I think opera and.

As I exited college, um, pursuing music as a career, didn't seem like a viable option. I was pretty much on my own at 15, and I never really had the [00:05:00] support that I felt like I needed. You know, I paid for everything myself. I got myself through college. I got myself through everything I needed to get myself through.

And it was very easy for me to convince myself. Chasing music. Wasn't an option for someone with a background like me. So after I left college and I decided not to use my degree, I needed a day job. And I started working as an assistant at a salon in Roswell. And that has led me almost a decade later to owning my own salon, which in its own way.

Produced its own kind of music. I use hair as a way to bring happiness to the people in my community because you know, a good haircut can leave anyone feeling absolutely amazing about themselves and completely changed their day even for, [00:06:00] you know, an hour. And that's why I've done hair. As long as I. And when the pandemic came around, you know, I, I couldn't be the supporter anymore.

That was kind of how I can't do music in my life. I was the supporter, the group B of all my friends. And I would always go to everyone's shows the genres. I didn't really care for. I would always hang out with everyone's promote their shows. And it just, that was how I kept myself intertwined in the world where my first love stayed.

And of course in the pandemic came around, we all found ourselves devastated and unsure what to do with ourselves. And when I had nothing to do and nowhere to go, I turned back to what I knew, which was my composition keyboard. I pulled out old sheet music. I moved into a new house, which kind of also prompted me pulling out old sheet music.

And I just realized. I love this, you know, I was posting videos, little snippets [00:07:00] of media, practicing vocal ranges, and, um, singing warmup songs that I liked a couple of covers that I recorded, you know, off of my laptop. And I was receiving such a surprise response. You know, like people forgot that I used to be a musician.

Of course, I didn't really openly advertise it for a long time. And everybody was like, what the heck? Like what, where did this voice come from? I didn't know this. I didn't know. You could do this. Yeah. I was like, yep. It's just been kind of fit in there. And of course it was a shaky start. You know, even your voice, no matter how talented you are, is it, um, is an instrument.

And if it sits in the garage, it will eventually start to detune itself and become unusable and you can lose it. People think you can't, but you can. And so it took me probably about six months of the pandemic to, to warm it back up and tune it back up. And I started, uh, retake. Um, so music theory [00:08:00] classes from an online website that Berkeley offers, and one thing led to another.

And I had my first little homemade single blueberry heart, which was just a piano pop ballad that I wrote. And I got found through Instagram, hashtags by Bentley. Right. And they reached out to me and I, I absolutely thought it was fake. I thought it was a scam. And a couple of my producer friends were like, no, I I've, I've heard them of them before.

And I was like, okay, well you want me on your label? I'll be on your label. And of course it's like a truly indie label, you know, it's, self-managed everything. They do. The hard work, the distribution work, the mastering work, but everything else is up. And, uh, they do the graphic design. And so while, um, and some promotion, but, um, I, I just, I fell back into it and I didn't want to lose it.[00:09:00] 

You know, it was like refinding myself. And I feel like a lot of people came out of the pandemic feeling the exact same way. It's like we had to revert back to. Who we were before we could freely roam the world. Right. And we all kind of relapsed, um, some in bad ways and some in really good ways. And I definitely think my relapse was beneficial and beautiful, and it taught me a lot about myself.

It taught me a lot about being alone and a lot about how much I need to perform music. And. And, and it's not a need for fame or for money. It's a need because I, I, I felt happiness that I hadn't felt in a long time. And I thought I wasn't happy, but singing that's, that's where my happiness lies. I love standing behind a microphone.

I love extending the threads of my emotions out to the [00:10:00] people listening to me. And I hope that's what I accomplish with my music. I, um, I consider myself a successful musician, as long as I can afford and hold myself up to just do that. Yeah. So, um, really appreciate you sharing that story with us. And, um, and I think it helps the audience as well to, to get to know you first, before we jumped into the lessons portion, but now let's jump right into the heart of things.

Um, you know, tell us. You know, what's one of the most important or unexpected lessons you've learned in your professional life. And tell us kind of the story behind that line. I think the biggest lesson, especially in the past five years that I've learned. From my professional life is understanding that no, the word no is not inherently confrontational for a long time.

I held myself back professionally, not just in the music [00:11:00] world, but in hair world. Um, as well as with my friends of my lovers, with my chosen family, I, I struggled. I struggled with the word. No. And for a long time, I thought no was confrontational. I thought by not saying no, I was being deemed as the person who is not confrontational, who is easy to manage, easy to work with.

And in reality, that comes off as lack of confidence. It comes off as being unsure of yourself. It comes off as just an unsteady foundation. And of course it took, uh, my therapy sessions that I was doing for awhile for this person to explain to me, you know, Sarah, why do you think that you struggle with confrontation so much?

And I really had to sit and think about it. And when I said to [00:12:00] her that I felt like the word no is confrontational. She, she posed a question to me because I ran into this situation. Where, um, just specifically professionally, I had just started my salon and I was running into these problems where I would have these new clients just, just haggle me, just hug me and haggle me and it would, and then by the end of the day, I would do all this stuff for them and, and barely break even just on their, on their visit alone.

And I was frustrated. I was frustrated because I just started my business. You know, these people wanted to come see me because they knew that I did good work from my previous salons that I've worked for, but they didn't want to pay me what I was worth. And by not understanding that no is a boundary and not inherently confrontational, I was struggling because I couldn't understand [00:13:00] why they didn't see the worst that I knew that I had.

And this goes for any aspect of your life. But the story comes specifically from my first few months as a business owner. And so one day I had this client who was being particularly Karen ish and I just, I just kind of lost my temper. I lost my temper because she, she had made an appointment. Um, I run a Groupon campaign and it's only good for a client's first visit, but it is an amazing marketing tool.

And it's gotten me so much business. Uh, but at first I really just didn't understand how to set boundaries and how to make it clear that those boundaries were from. And you could not talk me down from those boundaries because this is my work. And so I ran into this person and I'd already run into this problem quite a few times.

And so every time it happened, it frustrated me more and more and more because I was bottling up [00:14:00] this emotion from not saying, no, I was bottling up this anger and this resentment towards myself for not saying no. And, um, so this client comes in and she tells me, Hey, you know, you, you did my hair. Already I've already been in.

Um, but Groupon, let me buy this. So since they let me buy it, I just figured I'd go ahead and buy it and do it again. And I explained to her, I said, well, you know, in our last visit you asked me if you could do that. And at our last visit, I was very clear that that's only good for your first visit. What?

Well, it, let me buy it. So if it let me buy it. Obviously it's good. The customer's always right. And now my salon, I have a very open door policy, especially after the summer of 2020. Um, I got a, uh, a mutual friend of a friend to [00:15:00] paint a black lives matter and, uh, LGBTQ plus, uh, positive symbol on the front of my business.

And that. Had been kind of been preparing me for this moment. Uh, um, just, just that open door policy. And I explained to her, I said, well, you know how I feel about this? I am a small business owner and the customer is not always right. Well, that's just not good business, Sarah, because I already bought it.

So what do you expect me to do? Well, it's quite easy. You can go and you can ask Groupon to refund it because you haven't used it and you can pay me and they will give you your money back. So you want me to pay twice and that's what you want me to do. I don't really think that your services is worth me having to go through that hassle.

And so I had to say to her, well, you know, I'm really sorry that you feel that way. That's just, it is what it is. I've already set my policy. [00:16:00] So you're telling me no you're telling me no. Then you're telling me that you're not going to do my hair. And that sentence specifically triggered me and I. Tried to avoid the word.

No, for whatever reason, I kept trying to avoid it. And my voice was shaking and I was shaky and I cry when I get angry. And it's so frustrating because it's like, you're not crying because you're vulnerable. You're crying because you're mad. And then people think you're, you're being vulnerable. So they try and pray on that.

And that just makes you more bad. It's just that spiral. Anyone who cries when they're angry, knows what I'm talking about. Um, and so I'm starting to shake, I feel myself getting ready to cry because I'm getting angry. And, um, she says, so are you telling me that you're not going to take me? Are you telling me that you're just you're refusing the service because I want to use the Groupon.

And I finally said, No. And I can feel my [00:17:00] face turning red because she was doing that thing that clients who think they have the upper hand, they speak louder than you. They speak faster than you because they think the faster and the louder they are, the more you'll back down. Unfortunately for her, I had been bottling up this, this lack of no anger for several clients now, and I just unleashed it on her.

And so now I have like released the bottle and the emotions have, have completely started flowing through it. And I was like, no, I am not refusing you service. I am saying that your services are contingent upon you paying me what my services are worth. I made it clear to you last visit that the group on is only good for one visit and you are trying to take advantage of me and I am Polish.

That this is confusing to you. However, I don't think that this is going to be a worthwhile relationship. If you are going to treat me less than what [00:18:00] I'm worth. And then of course you started trying to backtrack and say, no, that's not what I'm trying to do. You did beautiful hair. And ultimately it ended with me saying that I just think that she, I thought felt like she needed to go and find a new school.

And that freed me. It was a freeing experience. I went and spoke to my therapist about a week later, cause I was doing teletherapy for a couple months during the, the early part of 2020. And that's when she sent it to me. And this sentence completely changed the entire yeah. Way I thought about the word no, and changed how I handled my business and has ultimately made me a happier person is that no is not an inherently confrontational word.

No is only confrontational. If you believe that how someone else sees you as, or views your worth as is [00:19:00] less than what you believe is. And that is what makes no confrontational. If you are saying no, from a standpoint of it being a boundary, because you understand your worth, it's not confrontational, it's just a boundary and it doesn't have to be negative.

And it just completely changed the way I viewed everything. And I have been a much happier and stable person just from that one. Okay. And so how about your personal life? What is a lesson in story that you can share with us? In my personal life, it was kind of similar. I struggled with the idea of what I saw confrontation being.

Um, I suppose it wasn't really about saying no to people as much as it was me trying to control situations, which I also. Um, learned to rectify in the early part of 2020. It's funny because I feel like 20, [00:20:00] 20 happening and becoming a business owner. It really shifted my way of thinking. It really balanced me out because I had to, um, my grandfather used to teach me that you will never have the resources for something.

If you don't go out and get it. If you want a house, get it. You will figure out how to afford it. If you want a new car. Get it, you will figure out how to afford it because you have to. And I, and that was how I approached becoming a business owner. I didn't have bunch of savings. I had no idea what I was going to do.

I had, I mean, I took business classes early on in my hairdressing career because I thought I figured it would be something I would want one day. So I wasn't going into it completely blindsided, but I went into it because. I was ready to be on my own. I was ready. I, I found myself saying to all these people, that one day I'm going to, I'm gonna do this on my own [00:21:00] one day.

I'm going to go for things that I absolutely want. One day, it was always one day and I was tired the same one day. And so when I started my business, it kind of changed the control dynamic as well, because I couldn't control. Whether or not, I would gain new clients. I couldn't control. You know, when I started chasing music, if people would like my music, I couldn't control the outcomes of things.

I could only do my best and hope that the outcome would be positive. And that was always an issue I was running into with my friends. I have always been the mama bear in every friend group I've ever been a part of, you know, I, I always offer the unsolicited health advice. I always had an opinion about something that I viewed as wrong.

I always needed in my mind to [00:22:00] control someone. Else's. And that became a problem in a lot of situations because I just always wanted to fix things. I wanted to fix people. Um, it probably had a lot to do with my childhood trauma from growing up, you know, starting at 15. Um, you know, a lot of what I experienced in life is my need to give love to other people.

And a lot of time that comes out as a woman. Okay. I kept running into this problem, the same problem over and over and over again. And, and, you know, sometimes it would, it would legitimately just be someone not being a good person. And it would legitimately just be someone who should not be in my life because they were not a good person, but a lot of the time it would be my own frustrations and my own.

Spiraling and me trying to control these situations that I wasn't meant to control or control, you know, [00:23:00] mistakes that friends or people that I loved would make without an understanding that it was not my place to control them or stop them from making those mistakes. So, especially there's a story that I think of that comes to mind.

That didn't happen that long before the pandemic happened, it was probably a year and a half before the pandemic. And I started going to this comedy club and interacting with this group of two girls. And they were just both train wrecks, you know, both the kind of people who. Needed validation from other people.

And I think at that time in my life, I did too. And that's probably what drew them, drew me to them. And then to me, um, and so for a time it was kind of harmonious situation because, you know, we were in this very symbiotic relationship, um, which [00:24:00] really was parasitic. When you look back on it, The three of us were receiving the validation from each other that we felt like we needed.

And it was just. One situation after another, where I would realize, you know, the kinds of people that these two girls were. And I would just have these Epiphanes like, well, if I just, if I just fix these girls, they would be great people. If I. Told these girls that Lang to others is not good or manipulating others is not good.

I would be able to fix these people. And I do believe that the most manipulative person can be, can be a good person. You know, I believe everyone has it within them to be better than they were yesterday. I believe everyone deserves a second chance. I believe everyone deserves happiness and love. But at this time, I just [00:25:00] was trying to control it.

I was trying to control these two people who did and said awful things about me, about themselves, about other people. And it was just a very toxic co-dependent friendship circle that I was in. And one thing led to another. And of course it exploded. And a lot of it was me blaming myself. I, you know, if I just tried a little harder, I can fix them.

If I just tried a little harder, everything would be okay. And it was probably that friend group that made me realize that control was feudal because I can only control myself my own healing journey. And as soon as I let go, Which probably it didn't happen immediately. It happened about a year and a half after, closer to the pandemic.

If I just let go of outcomes, the outcome I want will eventually come to me or the outcome [00:26:00] that I need. And that's probably the most profound lesson that I hope that everyone can learn is to let go and just go with the flow and stop trying to control. 

ShoutoutATL: Perfect. So really appreciate you sharing all these stories.

Thus today there's a ton of wisdom for our audience to take away. I'm sure there's something for just about everyone. And so, you know, thank you for that. We can't wait to have you back on the show again, but before we go, what is the best way for folks to connect with you? Learn more, reach out, et cetera.

The best way to connect with me is always going to be Instagram. Um, my Instagram is, uh, at fairies my own. I've also ventured out into the Twitter world. And of course I have Facebook's era things. Uh, my Twitter is there is miles that I Instagram. I like to stay connected with people there because everything is visual and beautiful and staying [00:27:00] connected with people who can consistently.

Go back and forth with you to exchange these beautiful things. That's probably the best way to reach me because I'm always looking at it.

ShoutoutATL: All right. Well, thank you. And thank you to everyone who tuned in today. We sincerely appreciate your time and we hope you'll subscribe. Tell others about the podcast and if you haven't. Please leave us a review. It means the world to us. Alrighty. See you all again soon. .