The Reluctant Homeschool Mom

The Reluctant Homeschool Mom. 
I see you. And I totally get you. When we moved back to California from Texas I knew I was going to have to homeschool our youngest two kids - and I genuinely didn't want to! 

Seriously, I loved having our kids in good schools. I loved having the days free to meet with friends, clean my house, go to Bible Studies, and go out to lunch with my husband. But, I also knew the Lord was calling me to this ministry of homeschooling our kids. So I asked Him for help. And guess what? He helped me - and our kids - every step of the way!

This message Rhonda taught at a homeschool convention. I hope it blesses and encourages you, my friend.

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"This podcast is for the purpose of mentoring only and is not a replacement for therapy. We suggest you seek out the help of a trained biblical counselor for help with your specific situation.”

Transcript

Rhonda Stoppe [00:00:00]:

Let's open in prayer. Father God, thank you for the people that are in this room. Thank you for those that are committed to take their kids and educate them at home. I pray, Father, that as you have called them to do this, that they would find your wisdom and your strength and even your peace, because we get so anxious and so overwhelmed even at an event like this. I pray, Father, that you would be our teacher now. In Jesus name, amen. My name is Rhonda stoppe. And I help women build no regrets lives.

 [00:00:32]:

My website is the no regrets. Actually, it's not the It's Noregetswoman.com. So we're going to get started. Homeschooling with no Regrets homeschooling is a unique calling to be a leader in all aspects of your kids life while leading your kids toward academic excellence. Don't lose sight of your true calling to lead your children to Christ. We have to realize and not lose our perspective. See, we get up every day and we go into survival mode, and we have all this stuff. I mean, I see you all walking around with your eyes and you're chaching cha ching, and you're buying all this curriculum and all that stuff.

 [00:01:09]:

And one lady was telling me yesterday, I buy stuff every year and it goes in a cupboard, and I don't even use it. I just pull it out, try it for a week, and on I go to something else. And it can be overwhelming because we want to have these kids that are raised that are just the best at their academics. I mean, it's kind of intimidating to homeschool your kids because it's life if they can't read when they're like, 14. Kind of reflects a little badly on what you've been doing. And so, you know, there's this pressure to do a good job. And there's a section in Moms raising sons to be men, and it's called People pleasing isn't pleasing. And I'm a middle child.

[00:01:40]:

I am a people pleaser from way back. And we have to be very careful that we don't raise our kids for what people think of us. Do you know what I'm saying? And so when we're homeschooling, that even makes it a little bit more of an intimidation, because I want them to ace those SATS. I want them to get into the best college, or I want them to fill in the blank. And we make that the priority of the time that we're spending with the and when we do that, we can raise really good kids. Good kids that don't smoke, chew, or go with girls that do. And we can raise kids that go to church and sit quietly when they're two years old in the front pew and never make a peep yay for you. Mine wouldn't do that.

[00:02:22]:

But if they leave our homes and they're good people and don't realize their need for a savior, what have we accomplished? Right? Because there's a danger. My husband was a youth pastor for 18 years. There's a danger of raising good kids that become a bit prideful over how good they are. I would never I never look what they did. I would never I get that. And as a pastor's wife, raising PKS, I'm telling you, PKS can be okay. But when we stepped into a full time not youth ministry, but pastor, my husband's been a pastor in Patterson, just down the road from here, for 17 years. And we prayed, God, if we take this job, we will not lose one of our kids.

[00:03:05]:

We will not lose one of our kids. That's our priority ministry. But it is something that, you know, God has called you to this, but we can get so focused on the business of raising good kids that we send them out into the world and they don't even realize their need for a savior. And maybe they do. Maybe they've asked Jesus into their heart and they've received Him, and they're living their life, and that happens a lot, and that's awesome. But can they be made aware by our genuine living in front of them except by God's grace? I would be this kind of a mom except by God's grace. God allowed us to homeschool. It's not because we're a better family than the ones that go to your youth group that don't homeschool.

[00:03:47]:

You know what? God resists the proud and he gives grace to the humble. And if God we all know that homeschooling is a humbling experience because we all know we don't know what we're doing. And we all get in there and we're like, oh, God. But sometimes those homeschooling kids can be raised. It's like, oh, we're the better kids because my mom homeschools us. And God resists the proud. He gives grace to the humble and is humbling yourself under the mighty hand of God that he may exalt you and your kids in due time. So every day we have to go before the Lord and say, god, keep me on my knees, keep me humble, keep my kids humble.

[00:04:21]:

And knowing my goal is not to raise kids that get into the best colleges, not to raise kids that get the best grades on whatever or can fill in the blank. That's the dream that they have them and help them get there. Yay. But raise kids that understand the purpose for their life is to know Christ and make Christ known in this generation. And the way they'll learn that is if they see it in you. So don't lose your perspective. You are on a mission. And I want you all to say with me, I can homeschool with no regrets.

[00:04:56]:

And you can. But you can also do it in a way that you look back and you regret. You get one shot at this. The first time that I spoke on moms raising sons to be men, I actually did it at this conference when my son had just come through adolescence, brandon and I asked know when I submitted the book proposal to Harvest House. I'm like, what should I name the book? What should I name the talk? And he said, call it you're not raising sea monkeys because you can't flush us down the toilet if you mess us up. We all know because we're homeschool. Moms. It's like, that's the easiest science project.

[00:05:23]:

Let's do sea monkeys again, mom. Yes, again. It's either or a volcano in the kitchen, and I'm sick of the volcano mass. You're not raising sea monkeys. You get one shot at this. And that's why my passion is to help women build no regrets lives, to help you build no regrets marriage, and to help you parent with no regrets. And if we lose sight of that eyes fixed on Jesus, if we're on this, you will build a regretful life. You will do it in a way that does not bring glory to the Lord, but it brings glory to yourself.

[00:05:55]:

Or you'll do it out of fear and anxiety of whatever. But there is a way. Jesus said, my yoke is easy and my burden is light. And if I've called you to it, I will equip you to do it, and I'll give you the want to. Remember the scripture that says it is God who works in you both to will and to do his good pleasure. We moved back to California after we had been in Texas for six years, and I knew I was going to have to homeschool when we moved back here. And I was, like, driving because it's a hard job, and I was really having the not want to. But you know what? God gives you the want to if it's what his plan is for your kids.

[00:06:32]:

And we also have to say I'm not the standard. If he didn't give you the want to, don't do it. Because if God's not doing it through you, it's a rough job, as is any ministry if God's not calling you to it. Correct. And if you're homeschooling your kids, it's a ministry that God's called you to. And just like, if he called you to Africa tomorrow, how would you prepare yourself? Would you just, like, wake up and go shopping for the clothes that are in style in Africa and learn the language and walk around and kind of every day wake up and be like, okay, God, send me someone to share Christ with. Send me someone to make Christ known. Send me someone that you want to reflect your glory in the way that I relate to them today.

[00:07:08]:

Do that through me today. You wouldn't want to waste that time that you were in Africa. What if in the back of your hut, you found, like, a vein of gold in some mountain and you started chiseling away at it and you started packing it in your suitcase and the your visa's up and they send you home and they stop you at the airport and they say, you can't take this gold with you? That's not yours. Well, no, I worked for it. And you forsook sharing the gospel. You forsook the people of Africa, which somebody sent you there to represent Christ and you mined for old and now party's over, go home, and they take your gold because you can't take that with you. Don't we do that in life? We're strangers, we're foreigners. We are an ambassador for Christ in this generation and we go, oh, pretty.

 [00:07:49]:

And we start chiseling out that little gold in the back. And maybe that's not a possession that you're into. Maybe it's the accomplishments of your kids. We all know what we want our kids to accomplish and sometimes we mine for that. And it seems like the right thing to pour our lives into and to forsake everything else because that's my kid. But Jesus says, pursue me. Pursue Christ. And living every day waking up and going, god, I want my kids to know Jesus because of how I relate to them today when I blow up at them.

[00:08:23]:

I want to have the humility to apologize to them when I'm on the phone and I'm gossiping and they walk in and they hear me. God convict me of that and make me repent to them. I want to be washed with the water of the Word because if I'm not being transformed by truth, I have nothing to teach these little people in my home, these little Oompa Loompas that you've called me to train. And it is a ministry that God has called us to and we can't lose our perspective to know Christ and make Christ known. Here's a quote from my book if my husband when you and your husband learn to live with a missional perspective, you can stop looking to each other to fix difficult situations. And you can know that whatever trials or blessing God allows to come your way are divinely orchestrated by the Lord so that you may be blameless and innocent children of God without blemish in a crooked and perverse and twisted generation among whom you shine as lights. This means that God will use whatever means necessary to shine his glory through your obedient lives so that through your testimony, he can create an appetite to know Him in those that he is drawing to Christ. Beginning with your children, one of the most dynamic evangelistic resources you have at your disposal is a happy marriage that reflects the joy of the Lord.

 [00:09:32]:

Homeschool wives we're so guilty of this. In fact, someone was just talking to me at my table and saying, yeah, I don't even take care of myself. I don't even do my makeup. I don't ever get out of wear the same yoga pants for three days. Who's going to know? You buy all black ones at your uniform, and you don't even am I kidding? And your husband comes home and you're like, hey, babe. And he's like, hey. I remember when I got pregnant with my youngest, and it was kind of a surprise pregnancy. We bought a house in the middle of nowhere, and it was on a ranch.

 [00:10:01]:

And my husband's dream was to be debt free and live in the country. And I'm like, okay, let's do that. And I remember the day that we bought this place, and I was covered with snow. It was adorable. Little gingerbread. And then when we closed escrow, we went back and looked at it. The know had melted and it was a shack, truly. And we lived on a generator for two years, slept on a sofa bed in the living room.

 [00:10:19]:

My two kids at the time were in the bunk beds in the bedroom. We had a wood stove in the living room. So I tried to be like, oh, it's just romantic, and it's going to be great. Of there were lots of tears, especially when the cows are coming from our neighbors and walking on top of the pipes on top of the ground because the people had no put them underground and breaking my water pipes. My husband's at work from five in the morning till seven at night. And this woman who was born in Los Angeles and lived in the Bay Area my whole life is now Green Acres living on a mountaintop. And when those cows would break the water, I had no water till Steve got home. And I would call him crying, and he'd be like, I'll be there as soon as I can.

 [00:10:55]:

And I remember "it's romantic. I'm going to embrace this life" And it was so romantic. I got a surprise pregnancy with my third child, and the road to our house was real winding, and so I didn't go anywhere because I was nauseous. And it made me sick those first four months, you know what I'm talking about? And I had given away all my maternity clothes because I wasn't going to have any more kids. God surprised us with two more. One, Kayla, who was our youngest, and then Tony picture of him somewhere. Our oldest son didn't come to our family till he was 15.

 [00:11:22]:

So you never know how God's going to ask you to be a parent. But I remember after the nausea was kind of passing and Steve was home for work, and we're sitting down at dinner, and I went in to go to the bathroom, and I looked in the mirror and I came out and I'm like, babe, how long have I looked like this? I had on, like his yellow slug, banana slug sweatpants and a big T shirt that was his and no makeup. And I'm like, how long have I looked like this? And he's like, it's okay. You're busy with the kids. And I'm like, he didn't say, oh, it's fine. But sometimes I think we just have to remember that we want to honor them by taking care of ourselves. And we can be the best homeschool mom, but how do we honor our husbands? Do you brush your teeth before you kiss him when he walks in the door? Do you kiss him when he walks in the door? Right. And having an understanding that the most secure children are the ones who know mommy and dad love each other.

 [00:12:11]:

And the best evangelistic tool that you have is if you're loving Christ the way God's called you to and that love is spilling over onto your husband, that is the magnet that will draw your kids to Jesus. My husband was a youth pastor for 18 years. And in the 18 years of youth ministry, kids that were raised in good Christian homes with hypocrisy, 75% of them leave the church and never come back after high school. And I have watched homeschool families behind closed doors gossiping about the people at church, but what they let their kids wear to church. And we would never and we're not like that. And mom, there's this thing called emotional incest where mom makes her kids her best friend. Usually it's your first born and you start dumping on him all the things that you're frustrated with. You start telling him about "your dad.

 [00:12:59]:

Just can't even put gas in the car, your dad." And you complain about your husband to your kids and you make them your best friends and you are undermining the security of your children. Do not do that to your kids. So if you are living in a way that says, I love your dad and your dad is my priority relationship, that gives them the security. That is just an incredible gift that you give them. And it's a magnet to have them say, mom and dad say they love Jesus and it's reflected in how they love each other and that spills over into how they love us. I want to know that Jesus and I shared in my last session. You give me a kid who's raised in a meth crack addict home and you say, hey, you know Jesus loves you.

 [00:13:41]:

You know Jesus knows your name and he loves you. And they go, Me? He knows my name. He loves me. I want to run to him. I want to know that Jesus. And you tell a kid that's been raised in a good Christian home with mom and dad that are hypocrites, jesus loves you. And they get in the car and they give each other the silent treatment. And those kids go, I know.

 [00:14:03]:

I've heard it my whole life. My parents have preached it, whatever. You have a huge responsibility to live it. If you're married to someone who is not a believer, how much more of an opportunity to honor that woman? I don't know why I'm even talking about this, but let me just tell you, if your husband is not a believer, you still are required by the Lord to honor and respect him. And a lot of times, women who are married to someone who doesn't know Christian undermine, well, dad, he doesn't pray. Oh, dad. He doesn't know. Jesus.

 [00:14:33]:

He won't go to church with us, and you're dishonouring him. You know what Peter said? Shut up. He will be one without a word. If you're loving your husband, respecting him the way God's called you to, even if he's not walking with Christ, and that will be the light that draws your kids to Jesus, your unconditional love for your husband, understanding that until God opens his understanding to his need for a savior, he's not going to see it. And if you have seen it, it's because God mercied you with salvation, and you should be grateful for that. And let's teach that to our kids. Let's teach that to our children. So the first point is we're going to talk about Moses, the reluctant leader.

 [00:15:13]:

And I want you all to say with me, I can homeschool with no regrets. Moses was a powerful leader, but he was first a reluctant leader. By the time that Moses saw the burning bush, he had already killed an Egyptian. He'd already been exiled in the desert of Midian, and he was happy to stay there. He was doing his midlife crisis. I'm 55 years old. I get it. I got to tell you, when Harvest House asked me to write the second book, I cried.

 [00:15:42]:

And I told Steve, please tell me I'm not allowed to write it, because if you tell me I don't have to do it if you tell me I'm not allowed and I was not kidding. And I got to tell you, my husband teared up. And he's like, I don't want you to do it. I want you home. But God's opening the doors, and for me to tell you no is disobeying the Lord, and I can't do that. And he said, Get alone with God and make your decision. And I looked at Moses's story, talk about convicting. He's like, get somebody else.

 [00:16:05]:

I don't talk so good. And God got kind of mad at know remember, he's like, you're doing it. You're doing it. So he was reluctant at first life. How about that? I don't want to home school. I remember that. I don't want to home school every year. Let this be the year I don't have to can we not afford a Christian school? What is going on? Why do I have to do this? Lord, some of us every year wrestle with it.

 [00:16:29]:

Some of us love it, and you're really good at it. Some of you make missions out of sugar cubes, and it's super fun. I was not a super fun home school mom. I'm like, get the work done. We'll go do something fun where I know some of you are like amazing and I appreciate that so much and I would love to have sent my children to your house. But Moses said in Exodus 311, but Moses said to God, I love this, who am I, that I should go to Pharaoh and bring the children of Israel out of Egypt? Exodus four one. And Moses answered and said, but behold, they will no believe me, nor hearken unto my voice, for they will say, the Lord did not appear to you. Nathan, our worship leader in our church is here today and he has a CD out if you want to get it on itunes.

 [00:17:16]:

It's called every breath, every beat. Awesome. And I listened to it. It's my jam before I speak in the morning. So I was listening to that this morning. My son Brandon's on there on the guitar and my daughter harmonizes, so it's kind of know my peeps are there. I think my son in law drums too. Yeah.

 [00:17:28]:

So I'm kind of a groupie. Anyway, there's song on there that he actually puts into words. This whole story of how Moses and he's like, Burning bush, they won't believe me. And I love that song because it's like, you know, he was going, no one's going to believe this. Send somebody else. I'm happy here. I tried. See, God puts into our heart something that he wants us to do.

 [00:17:47]:

Have you ever had it's that I gotta do it thing and then it's a decade later before God opens the doors. I remember Steve and I wanted to be in full time Christian ministry. We were youth ministry. We always did bivocational stuff. We were up until four in the morning with teenagers. He'd get up in the morning and go to work as a carpenter. And I remember for a decade praying that we could just do that job full time. And I think God made me do that.

 [00:18:09]:

Because when we finally went into full time ministry and it gets hard, he reminds you, you begged me for this. I'm like that's. Right? I did. Thank you. And I think the same know in Moses's heart, he saw the injustice of how the Egyptians were treating his people. And he killed an Egyptian because in his heart he wanted to do something. And God was like, Dude, not you're doing it in your own strength and you're going to mess it up. But when we do stuff in our own strength, it humbles us, doesn't it? And sometimes when we want to do something to serve the Lord and we mess it up, then we go, I'm out, I quit, I'm good.

 [00:18:45]:

And that's what happened to him. God humbled him to a place where he was in Midian, he was married, he had a couple of boys. He's good. He worked for his father in law. You know, that family business. I just take care of sheep. I don't have to talk to anybody all day long. If I don't want to.

 [00:18:59]:

I mean, my husband, he really likes to just work and he's pastor, and so by the time he gets home from work, there are no words left for me because when he was hammering, I could talk his ear off and he would actually respond. Now he's life, I'm just sure he hears. So I have to be very careful when I'm ready to have a conversation with him. But I think Moses was good in where he was ready to just stay right there. And he was a reluctant leader. He was a humble leader. He was humbled by God so that God could exalt him in due time. That's one.

 [00:19:32]:

Peter. Five, six. Ever been humbled by God? He's like, you know what, sweetheart? If I let you do what I've put in your heart to do now, it's going to be all about you. God anointed David as king at 17 years old, and it was at least 17 years before he danced in the streets of Jerusalem. As king, God's like, I'm going to anoint you, but you don't get to be king till I take you through the fire. Twelve numbers. Twelve three says this, I love this. Now the man, Moses was very humble above all the men that were on the face of the earth.

 [00:20:03]:

Wow. Can you imagine if God said that about your kid? Not that kid got the best grades in school, that kid was the best athlete of all time, but that kid is one of the most humble people on earth. God uses people from our place of humility, and we have to continually come back to him. See, when you get mad about something, something's violated you or something has made you upset because you just mopped that floor and they walked all over it. You can know that it's an idol in your life. And what is it? Respect of others. You don't care what I do all day. So it doesn't mean I'm not going to teach my kids not to walk on a floor after I mopped.

 [00:20:41]:

It because I want them to not do that to their wives. But when I get mad to achieve my goal, then I know it's my pride and it's my idolatry of respect. You will respect what I do all day. And they're like, sure, okay. Instead of saying, Time out, if I let you do that, you're going to do that to your wife, and you're going to be telling her by your actions, I don't care what you do all day. Here's a mop, go for it. The next points are in weakness, and I'm going to give you the points and then we'll go back over them and you're in your notes. In weakness, a, God's character is revealed, b, God's strength is revealed, and C, God's glory is revealed.

 [00:21:26]:

Exodus three six says this, and he said, I am the God of your father, the God of Abraham. The God of Isaac and the God of Jacob. And Moses hid his face, for he was afraid to look at God. Exodus 313 says this then Moses said to God, if I come to the people of Israel, and I say to them, the God of your fathers has sent me to you. And they ask, what's his name? What shall I say to them? Exodus 314 god says this to Moses, I am who I am. And he said, Say this to the people of Israel. I am has sent you in. On Chronicles 1716, king David said this then King David went in and sat before the Lord, and he said, who am I, O Lord? And what is my house that you have brought me thus far, ladies? I pray that a lot.

 [00:22:14]:

I'm kind of crazy. I would have sucked the life out of my husband trying to get him to make me happy. I would have been resentful when he didn't measure up to my expectations. I'm not an arguer. I'm a silent treatment person. And I would have killed our marriage by what's wrong? Nothing. Okay, they ask. Then they go watch TV and you're like, I can't believe you just went and watched TV.

 [00:22:40]:

You said nothing. I know the wife I would have been, and I know the mom I would have been. But by God's grace, when Meredith was four and Brandon was born, I shared this in one of my sessions. So if you already heard it, sorry, but I'm busy. I got to make some Valentine centerpieces for the Valentine church and get your shoes and let's go and come on and what do you mean you can't find your shoes? You just had the that whole thing. You know what I'm talking about. And Meredith at four years old, firstborn girl, very articulate. They know everything.

 [00:23:13]:

By the way, she said, I know you can't wait till we're grown, so you can do whatever you want. Four years old. Thank God she was the firstborn and not my son, or he wouldn't have said a word. And we'd just been on Oprah one day talking about his feelings, but I got a glimpse of the impression I was giving my kids. You're an inconvenience to my ministry. Now get your shoes and let's go. And we have to understand that. They need to understand you are my ministry.

 [00:23:42]:

You are the one that God has called me to pour into. Now, I will tell you this. That does not excuse you from serving in your churches, because a lot of homeschool families are no, no, I homeschool. That's all I do. And they don't come down and work at VBS, and they don't stay after church and say, hi, I'm so glad you're here visiting. Let me just give you a little commercial. Wherever you go to church, that's your home. And if someone walked into your house and you didn't know them, you wouldn't not make.

 [00:24:07]:

Eye contact with them. And someone's here. Oh, my goodness. Someone's here. Should we talk to them? Somebody else will talk to them. The dog's talking to the good. That's good. No, you would be hospitable, which God calls us to be hospitable.

 [00:24:18]:

And you would walk up to them and you'd say, welcome. Hi. My name is Rhonda. And you would offer them a drink of water. You would say, hey, how old are your kids? Let's get you connected. Because that's hospitality. I have to tell you. I have visited churches.

 [00:24:34]:

I have visited women's retreats, because I go by myself a lot, and people do that to me. I'm sitting there by myself at a table, and they're like, somebody else will sit with her after I speak the first time. Then they're like, hi. And I'm like, Where were you when I was feeling all alone? Make it your ministry and teach your kids, this is our home, and we are going to welcome you. Your pastor cannot do it himself. And your pastor's wife may not be the person that can just walk up to people and talk to them. It may be, just know she'll go work in the nursery and clean in the kitchen. Praise Jesus that she wants to do that.

[00:25:10]:

But God has called us to bring people in. Not you get three times when people visit your church. You get three opportunities to make them feel welcome, and then they're moving on. If they even come three times. In weakness, God's character is revealed. Who am I, O God, that you should know my name and what is my family that you have brought me thus far? I know the woman I would be. I know the kids I would have raised. I know the marriage I would have ruined, except that because of the tightest two women in my life, when Meredith said, I know you can't wait till we're grown, so you can do whatever you want, I'm like, I need help.

 [00:25:42]:

So I bought books to be a better mom. And the books made me feel guilty because I realized they didn't have the power to change me or I didn't read them. And that made me feel really guilty because they're over in the corner getting stacked up in dusty. And when I reached out to Titus two women who were real and genuine, and they spoke truth into my life, and they invited me to study the Word with them, those women saved my marriage and saved my children from being raised by a crazy lady. And that's god's plan. That the Titus two women, the older would teach the younger how to love their husbands and love their children. And yet we're busy because I'm homeschooling. I'm raising my kids.

 [00:26:17]:

I know you have a two year old that you think is going to go to jail one day. You'll get through it. But I don't have time to tell you about that because I'm on the note. You're a Titus Two woman to someone, and God says, hey, I want you to tell them you're going to survive these sleepless nights with that newborn. Hey, I know you feel like you're super busy and don't have time to be washed with the water of the Word, but if you miss that, you will not have the strength to do what God's called you to do. I'm praying for you, moses on the top of the hill, holding my arms up. I'm here lifting you up. We have to understand that if we are not those Titus Two women, who is going to be? And that's why I write the books that I write and why I speak, because it's just imagine you had your own personal marriage mentor or mommy mentor.

 [00:26:56]:

It's written the way that I talk. I write it in tiny little bites because I speak at Mops. I speak it all over the place. And women say, I'm not a reader. I'm like, okay, you read Facebook all day long, so you're a reader, dude. You just don't want to read a book. I get it. So I write it in tiny little bites.

 [00:27:10]:

Just put on the toilet because it's only five minutes out of the day that you get by yourself, except for the toddler's fingers that are under the door going, Mommy. That's why we're always constipated until our kids junior high and just read through the books and get the wisdom. The Moms raising Sons to be men is stories of moms in history. Spurgeon's mom, Billy Graham's mom, women that we can just glean from what they did in their generation. It's your turn now. The baton has been handed to you. And the marriage is just book is just full of love stories. I can't even tell you I don't have time to chase that rabbit.

 [00:27:44]:

But I'm telling you those love stories will inspire you to build that kind of a marriage that shines brightly, that draws others to want to know our savior. Because everybody gets married hoping for happily ever after, and everybody wakes up and says, what happened? I married a person. When Steve and I were on our honeymoon, we went to a whole bunch of fun places, and one of them was Yellowstone, and we wanted to see the geyser. So we took a month. It was super fun. Like, went to Mount Rushmore and the Grand Canyon. Just super fun stuff. And when we went to the Yellowstone, Steve's like, I got an idea.

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Let's hike up there. And when we're up that high, from that vantage point, we'll be able to see the geyser go off from up there. It's going to be super cool. And I'm like, okay, I have to back up a little bit of story, because when I talked about being constipated is what made me think of this. I was super constipated. I mean, we were traveling in a car. I was eating fast food. So the night before that, Steve had said, just take one of these little pills, and it's going to make everything.

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I'm a 20 year old blushing bride, but I'm like, okay. So I take the little pill the next morning, nothing happens. So steve's like it's. Okay. We'll do another one tomorrow, and let's go to Yellowstone. So we go to Yellowstone and know, had my morning coffee and all that, and then we start hiking up this mountain. So I've had coffee, I've had a laxative, and I'm getting exercise. And the higher that we get up, the gurgling starts in your belly.

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And I don't want him to I'm like a hanging back. It's like, I'm super embarrassed. Once you have a baby in front of him, then you're like, whatever. But at that point, I was just like and so I'm kind of hanging behind him, and then I'm like, dude, I kind of think I got to get to the bathroom. And he said, you think you can make it? We're like, almost at the top, and I could see him. He's like, looking at the top, and he's looking at me, and I'm like, I can make it. So the we start hiking. At this point, I hadn't broken it to him that I'm not a hiker.

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I hiked with him when we were dating, but it's like, okay, I'll give him a couple of months into the marriage, and then I'll break that one to him. So I'm hiking up there, and he's looking at me, and he's like, you okay? And I'm like, literally hiking and stoppe hiking and stuff, you know what I'm saying, composing myself. And then finally I go, dude, if I don't get back down there, we're going to have our own geyser right here. I got to go. So I hiked back down, and the I know was thinking that whole for better or worse thing. He's like, the mountain's right there. And it was going to be sunset. So this is his one chance because the park closes at sunset.

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So he decided to forego his plan and walk me back down to the restroom. I made it went to the bathroom. It was fine. But the park was closing, and we didn't get to hike back up to see Old Faithful up there. And I think that's when my husband realized he did not marry a princess. And that's what we all have, those stories where it's like, we're just, oh, I married a real person. And whenever you get to that place, you have to understand that as you live, in light of that's who you are, you expect mercy from them. You want their kindness and their grace to cover the things that you do.

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You ran the ATM card and you overdrew or you hit something with a car or forgot to put gas in it, and he had to go somewhere early in the morning. You want him to believe the best about you. Corinthians says, love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. You want them to believe that you didn't do it intentionally. But don't we look at them as soon as they walk in and it's like the toilet seat was up in the middle of the night and we fell in and we're like, that was intentional. I know he did that on purpose, and maybe he's passive aggressive and maybe he ticked him off and maybe he did, but for the most part believe the best about him. It's like, no, they just forgot. They just forgot.

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God's strength is revealed is the next point in our weakness. God's strength is revealed. Two Corinthians 1210 says, for the sake of Christ, then I am content with weakness, insults, hardships, persecution and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong. One Corinthians Twelve Nine says this and he said to me, my grace is sufficient for thee, for my strength is made perfect in weakness most gladly. Therefore this is Paul talking. Will I rather glory in my infirmities that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Exodus 30 315 and he said to them, I love this.

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He said to him, if your presence does not go with me, I will not go up from here. Carry us not up from here. Ladies. I have prayed that so many times when God's calling me to go somewhere or do something, it's God. If you're not going with us, if you're not going with me, I'm not going. I do not want to do anything in my own strength because I know I'll mess it up. I know I'll do it for my own glory. I know I'll do it out of my own kind of the puppet master kind of manipulating everything, trying to make it all work out.

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It's like, I just want to go only if you send me. And I pray that often in my weakness, God, I won't go unless you send me. The next point is God's glory is revealed when his strength is at work in your weakness. Zechariah Four Six says, not by might, nor by power, but by my spirit, says the Lord of hosts. One Timothy 112 I thank him who has given me strength, Christ Jesus our Lord, because he judged me faithful, appointing me to his service. If God has given you children, he has judged you faithful appointing you to that service. If God has called you to homeschooling, it is a ministry that he has judged you faithful to his service.