I wonder about the person who struggles with sympathy . They might be asking like where do I get the power to sympathize with other people ? And I would say you need to look to Christ and see that he was sympathetic towards you . Hebrews 4 , verse 15 , for we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weakness . God does not just stand over and above human suffering and human weakness . He is the God who laid down his crown and willingly stepped into our human suffering .
Oscar NavarroHe was the God who experienced homelessness Matthew 8 20 . His family thought he was crazy . His best friends turned their back on him . One of his closest confidants sold him for a pocket change . He stood face to face with the devil and endured demonic tricks . He dealt with death . He endured gossip and slander . He endured suffering for righteous sake . He was shamed publicly . He experienced periods of hunger . He received criticism over his ministry . His theology was mocked . His message was rejected . His preaching was critiqued . His disciples , his closest friends , didn't get it and furthermore , worst of it all , or the one that matters most , he endured complete separation from God . Why did he endure complete separation from God ? Which he says on the cross my God , my God , why have you forsaken me , so that we would not have to experience that separation from God ? He is our savior , who sympathizes with our weaknesses and with our needs , and through that sympathy we have salvation . That is the power we have to sympathize with other people .
Emeal ZwayneSomething really ruffled my feathers this morning . My fair feathered friends Last night , in the middle of the night , this song that I have not heard in I don't know five , six , seven , eight years . It's been a long time . I'm smiling because I know you're going to sing , just popped into my mind , you guys will remember this one .
Ray ComfortPlease send your kids out of the room .
Emeal ZwayneIt's an oldie but a goodie , here it goes My-a-e-a , my-e-oo , my-e-a , my-e-a-a . You guys remember that one ? Yeah , I don't remember the words .
Mark SpenceThat's pretty good .
Emeal ZwayneRemember it went viral . It's some Romanian song it sounds like my chickens .
Ray ComfortTony , this is urgent .
Oscar NavarroI'm unable to mute easy .
Emeal ZwayneMaybe it was your chickens , but remember this one guy , this real funny guy , lip-synced the song just sitting at his computer on the camera and it went viral , it exploded and I just out of nowhere how does a brain do that ?
Ray ComfortThat is funny . Yeah , I find the same thing and I've got memories from like 50 years ago that I what am I hanging on to that for ? It's just a weird little happening man seriously , it's scary to think of like you know , the brain has stuff stored in it .
Emeal ZwayneBut what determines what stuff it pops up , you know , at the forefront of your mind .
Ray ComfortWho's getting the ?
Emeal Zwaynefiles to the front . Yeah , who does this ? But the reason why my feathers are ruffled is because I tried to hum the tune into Siri to find the song for me and it didn't work . And you're surprised . That made me so mad . How crazy you guys . Now you could actually , if you're walking through somewhere , you could tell your phone to listen and it'll find the song for you .
Ray ComfortWhy is this set as listening my iPad after you said that just says I'm listening you serious , yeah , it's synchronized to my voice today .
Emeal ZwayneYeah , so I'm looking , because I had the tune going through my head but I didn't remember what it was .
Mark SpenceMaybe it only recognizes masculine voices .
Emeal ZwayneI put in fat guy singing funny song and it was the first thing to pop up on YouTube . Really , yeah , oh , that was very funny .
Ray ComfortThanks for sharing that . That was really edifying . Yeah , that was my whole point right .
Emeal ZwayneThat guy's a listener by the way . I come to bring edification . He doesn't care . That dude's a legend now . But that got me thinking . Where do we get these sayings Ruffled my feathers . Ray , you immediately thought of your chickens , Of course .
Ray ComfortWhy ? Because they've got feathers , and when I brush them , they ruffle . Yeah , I don't brush them .
Emeal ZwayneThey unruffle I could totally see you brushing your chickens , yeah , but stuff like ruffles my feathers gets under my skin .
Ray ComfortOr the fur on your back of your head stands up . Have you heard that one ? The back of your head , yeah , back of your neck , oh , your neck . That's when you're really angry .
Emeal ZwayneYeah , or sticks in my craw . What ?
Oscar NavarroYou ever heard that one ? That's not a thing I don't know .
Emeal ZwayneOh , it is oh yeah , oh , that really sticks in my craw , rubs me the wrong way . What's that one ?
Mark SpenceIt goes the opposite way , like a shark Like a shark , I think DL .
Ray ComfortMoody said does this rub you up the wrong way ? Then let the cat turn around . Oh .
Emeal ZwayneSo it's going against the grain Is that what that means .
Oscar NavarroDebra has this story where he's preaching somewhere in the Middle East and he's got a translator that's translating everything he's saying into Farsi , I think and so he's going through a sermon and then he gets to like something he's going to say and he goes . You know , it's the straw , the boat broke the camel's back and he looks over at the guy translating , he goes . I don't know if you guys have that phrase here and the translator goes , that phrase comes from here . If you guys have that phrase here and the translator goes , that phrase comes from here , that's funny .
Emeal ZwayneThat's really good , yeah , but a bunch of them were coming to mind Fly off , the handle Spitting mad or feeling down in the mouth , which is ridiculous .
Ray ComfortDown in the mouth . Down in the mouth Up in the nose you ever heard feeling down in the mouth when you're depressed ? Yeah , dentists actually .
Emeal ZwayneBut isn't it so weird , ray , like you said that and immediately it brought something to my mind . Oscar didn't know it , so he can't connect , but when you know something , when you break down the idiom literally , it makes no sense . But we can connect with it the word idiom comes from idiot .
Ray ComfortIdiot idiom .
Oscar NavarroOr , like you guys ever say , you're the spaghetti to my meatball .
Emeal ZwayneWhat no ?
Oscar NavarroI just made that up .
Ray ComfortYou just started a new thing .
Emeal ZwayneA bone to pick , flipped my lid , tickled me pink . What's that ? Tickled me pink .
Ray ComfortWell , you know , if you start tickling me , I'll go pink , seriously . Yeah don't even joke , prove it .
Emeal ZwayneRed , you go red no you start with pink before you go red . That's the starting stage . Over the moon , on cloud nine , happy camper .
Mark SpenceHappy camper ? Yeah , there's no such thing as happy campers .
Ray ComfortNot in the Spence family .
Emeal ZwayneNot in real life .
Ray ComfortNot when there's a beer , comes in your tent .
Mark SpenceYou have like five little kids you've got to take care of in the tent , had a whale of a time .
Ray ComfortA whale of a time , a whale of a time Whale of a time that was started by Jonah yeah .
Oscar NavarroIt wasn't good how was your ship . Shipwreck .
Emeal ZwayneI had a whale of a time and then happy as Larry .
Ray ComfortYeah , we met Larry in Santa Monica Remember .
Emeal ZwayneLarry ? What's your name , larry ? After he claimed to be God , you've heard that one , franz . All right , I got to cut this short because we have a long comment and this one's worth reading . Time for a cool , classy comment . Greetings , easy , ray , mark and Oscar . My name is Julia and this email comes to you from Gilbert , arizona .
Emeal ZwayneI'd like to share a story , one that is still unfolding but reveals God's smiling providence and how he truly is in every detail of our lives . About one year ago , I was engaged to another professing believer , eager and excited to be married . A few weeks before our scheduled wedding , the relationship was brought to an abrupt end and he left my life faster than I could recover the air in my lungs . But it is moments like those that remind you how sweet the Lord's mercy is in every breath we take . That fall , I had the blessing and opportunity to attend G3 conference with a few members of my church . It is impossible to put to words the way the Lord used that conference to minister to my aching heart and connect with people that would be instrumental in encouraging me during an emotionally trialing season . And a few of you were there too , recording several episodes of the Living Waters podcast , which I had the privilege to witness , fast forward a few more months and , after much encouragement of my friends and my pastors , I created a dating profile on a Christian dating site . One of my photos on the profile included a picture snapped at G3 , me and a few friends standing before one of the giant G3 photo op signs . In fact , I think your booth is behind me in the photo .
Emeal ZwayneWell , not too long after my profile went up did I receive a message from a very cute , if I can add , gentleman . It turns out this gentleman is a huge Living Waters podcast fan . He listens to every episode you release . It turns out that he had just listened to one of the episodes you recorded at G3 a week or two prior . It turns out that it would be on that episode that he would learn about G3 Ministries for the first time . It turns out that my profile showed up in his feed and he saw my G3 photo . It turns out that he felt confident that I'd listened to Saul's biblical teaching if I was at G3 , all to the praise of the Lord that I am under Saul's teaching . And it turns out that our first date was so clearly a gift from the Lord and he redeemed the brokenness sin .
Ray ComfortWe all have a little violin in the background , an heartache of our lives .
Emeal ZwayneWe went on our second date the very next day , but of course none of this is a surprise , because the Lord knew all of this and would ordain every ordinary moment that led to the first time that Travis and I got coffee together .
Emeal ZwayneOne of the Christian hymns highlighted this past year at G3 belongs to William Cowper , and in it he writes Judge not the Lord by feeble sense , but trust him for his grace . Behind a frowning providence he hides a smiling face , Again hard to put to words . That way , a few days in Atlanta would be used so abundantly by the Lord . I share this with you because Travis and I have so much gratitude in our hearts for the four of you and for your Living Waters ministry . It not only has been used by God to bring us together from strangers to preparing for marriage , but also has been used by Him to encourage us , convict us , challenge us and bring us closer together , as you have pointed us to Christ time and time again . Thank you for being part of our story and for being instruments of God's truth and encouragement in our lives each
week . I pray that I follow up this email with a wedding announcement soon .
Mark SpenceAre we gonna be invited ?
Ray ComfortThat would be a great sanctified hallmark movie . Mark will officiate and he's guaranteed .
Oscar NavarroAre we going to be invited ? That would be a great sanctified Hallmark movie . Mark will officiate and he's guaranteed to get at least half your names , right ?
Emeal ZwayneThat will never die . Oh , Julia , that's amazing . Yeah , Thank you so much . That's from Julia Logering and I hope I pronounced that right L-O-E-G-E-R-I-N-G . That really touched us . And how cool you think of the different stories . We've had people that have met . I think there was a couple that may have met at our ambassador's academy ended up getting married .
Oscar NavarroWhen we did London , we had a couple . She lived somewhere in .
Ray ComfortAfrica . Could you be a little more specific ? When we did London ?
Emeal ZwayneYeah what did you do in London ?
Oscar NavarroWe did the London outreach , the King's coordination . We had a couple at least a thousand plus people come to help hand out tracks and we did a conference before to encourage , to edify and to get people out there training as well . And while we were there we met a couple . She was from Africa , he was from Canada . I believe they were engaged and they only get to see each other once a year . She was from Africa , he was from Canada . I believe they were engaged and they only get to see each other once a year .
Oscar NavarroThat's all they can afford and they determined to use our outreach to see each other before their wedding . Isn't that cool , wow Praise .
Emeal ZwayneGod , we are bringing people together .
Oscar NavarroEvery year .
Emeal ZwayneI hope we don't get blamed for divorces one day . God forbid All right friends .
Oscar NavarroIt all started when he started listening to your podcast .
Emeal ZwayneWe could send him a wedding gift card of Chick-fil-A oh yeah , now that Ray has thousands , all right friends , time for a radically revolutionary resource Made in Heaven Man's indiscriminate stealing of God's amazing design . One of my absolute favorites , in fact , ray . I was looking at the cover this morning . I can't get over what a brilliant job they did on this .
Ray ComfortYeah , it's beautiful and the photos are magnificent . The layout just everything .
Oscar NavarroI mean it's really really top-notch you know it's good because it's one of the few books Ray remembers writing .
Emeal ZwayneBecause it has pictures in it . That's why All right friends make sure to check it out , along with the Living Waters mug and the Evidence Study Bible all at livingwaterscom . Hey , it's supposed to match me . It did , it was fun .
Mark SpenceThat's how I sound really Squeaky .
Emeal ZwayneAll right friends , On to the show .
Ray ComfortToday we are talking about . I'd like to see a picture of your vocal cords Scritchy they are .
Mark SpenceAnd I want to get a picture of your brainwaves on how you work and act and respond . You don't slow down , yeah .
Emeal ZwayneRay oh , I should have , you should have gone to the Smithsonian .
Oscar NavarroI'd love to see that Ray comforts brainwaves . They go into it and it's just a monkey .
Emeal ZwayneRay , how far are you into your new book , Ray ?
Ray Comfort34% through .
Emeal ZwayneWow , when did you start it , ray ?
Ray ComfortAbout two and a half weeks ago , wow .
Emeal ZwayneAmazing . Let's not talk about how long it took me to write my book . All right , wow , that's amazing . Let's not talk about how long it took me To write my book . Alright , friends , I suppose you're going to Ask for the title .
Ray ComfortThe title of my book , no , not yours .
Oscar NavarroMine .
Mark SpenceDo you know the title Of your book ?
Ray ComfortYes , jesus , amplified Going back to the Original Greek Words of Jesus . That's fun .
Emeal ZwayneThat's great Jesus , that's great Ray Wow .
Ray ComfortRepent you better edit that out .
Emeal ZwayneI'm thinking of the Lord all the time that I do that . Amen , all right , friends . On to the topic of the day Today the sovereignty of God , boy anything is fitting .
Ray ComfortWhat is it ? Should we have a show ? Sympathetic , Be sympathetic . Wait what ?
Oscar NavarroYeah , yeah , you got the wrong one .
Emeal ZwayneSympathy , it's sympathy . Next one is sovereignty . Wait oh .
Oscar NavarroI went down too far .
Ray ComfortOh , how to grow in being sympathetic . Spoiler alert what our next one's going to be . We're just getting sympathy towards you Easy .
Emeal ZwayneOh man , I switched up the comment . It was supposed to go on the other one . Why do you guys do this to me ? It's your fault , oscar Easy we're being sympathetic towards you . Okay , and just rest in the sovereignty of God , if you messed up .
Mark SpenceMaybe if you showed up on time he's .
Emeal ZwayneYou guys are bad people , all right . So there we are . We're talking about . You can hear the disappointment . At least I have the notes this time . How to grow in being sympathetic toward people ? Here's the online definition of biblical sympathy people . Here's the online definition of biblical sympathy . In the Bible , sympathy is the ability to understand another person's situation , especially when they are suffering or in pain , to share that experience .
Ray ComfortWhat are you doing , ray ? Hurry up Easy . Will you hurry Get on ?
Emeal Zwaynewith it . Why do I under ?
Ray ComfortI think Mark started that , this movement , the turning of the hand to say hurry up , yeah .
Emeal ZwayneThe word sympathy comes from the Greek word , which can also mean to be affected by the same feeling as another or to show a willingness to help because of a shared feeling .
Ray ComfortI like that , isn't it ? One down from empathy ? Yes .
Emeal ZwayneYeah .
Ray ComfortSympathy is what Jesus had . Sympathy is what kind of we've got .
Mark SpenceYeah , boy , I have a lot to talk about that .
Ray ComfortOkay , is it a good time to ?
Emeal Zwaynetalk about that Talk . Go ahead , talk , mark talk .
Mark SpenceThe Christian walk is first about fellowshipping with God and then fellowshipping with each other . Right , our fellowship with each other is designed to go deeper than sports and politics Our koinonia , our fellowship with one another . In order to go deep , we move from sympathy a lot of times to empathy , right , sympathy is like you got into an accident and you broke your wrist . Man , I sympathize with you . I've never broken a wrist . Right . Empathy takes it a step further , because I understand what you've gone through , because I've gone through that .
Right . So somebody who loses a limb , for example , and has no ability to walk anymore , can look at you as you try to sympathize with them , and they respond with well , you don't know what it's like to go through what I'm going through . They can't say that same thing to somebody like Johnny Erickson , tata . Right , because they've walked in those steps , no pun intended . Right , that they have been where they have gone . Well , we listen .
Mark SpenceScripture says that some are appointed to suffer for his namesake . And there are a lot of people that are rallying around a close family member of mine with great sympathy . And then there's a couple of people that are coming along with great empathy because they've gone through what this family member has gone through and my family member and this individual can weep together and they're speaking each other's language . They understand each other without having to say anything else . That's good . Right , it's like I weep with those who weep , of course , but weeping with somebody who's gone through what I've gone through , it's like no language is necessary , no scripture is needed , no anecdote , no , nothing . It's like there's an understanding and then they're dwelling in deep koinonia , fellowship , because they've walked in that same position as the other person . Right , there's the difference between sympathy and empathy , right ? Sympathy you feel sorry for someone's misfortune , you recognize their pain , but you don't share their emotional experience because you've never experienced it yourself . Empathy the ability to understand and share the feelings of another person . It involves putting yourself in their shoes and experiencing their emotions as if they were your own , because you've been through it yourself . There's the greater difference .
Mark SpenceNow , what does this bring ? Here's the obvious You're going to go through it . You are not going through what you're going through for your own sake . When you go through that fire , as you get older , as you mature , as you learn , you're going to grow , you're going to change , you're going to mature , and now you're able to share those things with other people that the Lord has shared with you . Listen , you're going to mature and now you're able to share those things with other people that the Lord has shared with you . Listen , you're going to make it . This , too , shall come to pass .
Mark SpenceBut , god , this isn't our home . This removes the roots here on earth and has your roots to grow vertical up into heaven instead of down here on earth , because this isn't our home . Right , we are homesick for a home we've never been to , and this is what trials are going to do . And when people are able to empathize more than sympathize , it's just a prettier picture . But nobody wants to go through pain , right ? I'm allergic to not a lot of things , but I'm allergic to pain . Right , it doesn't do well with my body . But God says no , listen , you need those trials If you want to have those spiritual muscles stretched . You got to go through the trial and that's the only way you can have those muscles stretched .
Emeal ZwayneRay sing Refiners Fire .
Ray ComfortNo no no , you cannot make me .
Emeal ZwayneHow does it go , though I ?
Mark Spencedon't remember the word .
Ray ComfortI've never heard it before . What's the opening four lines Gang up on me .
Emeal ZwayneYeah , mark , that was beautifully put and you know it reminds me of 2 Corinthians 1 , where it talks about how he comforts us in all our affliction , that we may be able to comfort others with the comfort with which we ourselves were comforted by God . Amen Perfect . And that is that level of empathy , you know and I was relating this to someone the other day like what it's like when you've been to another country and it's been a while and you haven't been home and then you meet someone who's not just from your country but even from your state and sometimes from your area . That's happened to me a number of times Like have you eaten at this restaurant ?
Emeal ZwayneOh , I love that restaurant and like they're talking about streets and areas and you feel at home while away from home .
Mark SpenceDo you ever go back to Westminster areas where you kind of grew up in ?
Emeal ZwayneOh , all the time . In fact , I was wanting to go by the other day because I was in Huntington , I was near it and I'm like yesterday in fact again , I just always love to go back .
Ray ComfortSo that was when you were in the Crips . You want to go back .
Emeal ZwayneNo , that was beforehand , was beforehand .
Ray Comfortthat's when I was uh uh , choking kids in elementary school . Anyway , why do you bring out bad memories ? Right , they were good memories , as I'm concerned .
Emeal ZwayneYeah , it's great . So , um , so , yeah , um , yeah , I was always fighting . Just to give context to that , I wasn't going around killing people also he was going around killing people . Yeah um , but no , you know what I mean , though . Right like that feeling of you meet people in another country that are from your home and you just feel at home all of a sudden , because they're speaking your language , they know your area , they've eaten at the same restaurants , they're familiar with the climate , everything .
Ray ComfortWhen I meet someone from down under , I just say meat , pies , fish and chips , meat pie , meat pie . Yeah , oh , meat pie . It's not white boy Meat pie .
Emeal ZwayneMeat pie , Well it happens with Lebanese people too . When I run into someone Lebanese , just like immediately the walls are broken down .
Ray ComfortYeah , I say tabouli to Lebanese people .
Emeal ZwayneNo , you say other terrible things that your dad taught you when you were a little boy . What is it May ruin ?
Ray Comfortcome upon your home , you empty head , yeah my dad was in the war and he learned a few phrases from the Middle East and I picked them up . I don't know what they meant , but I told him it's easy and his hair's still on end . I can't believe you weren't killed by some Arab . Yeah .
Emeal ZwayneArabidik mafishmok , Yakhrabaitak mafishmok May ruin . Come upon your house .
Mark SpenceYou empty head this is what Ray was going around telling Arab people and he'd smile and laugh . Do you say it with an Indian accent ? Of course ?
Emeal ZwayneYou're going to pay to my future mom . That was pretty good , anyway , but yeah , that's great . And yet , at the same time , I think , though , sympathy is not empathy . There's a general element to sympathy because , generally speaking , we've all been through tough times , even if it's not that particular thing that person is going through , which is why it gives all of us the ability to be able to minister to each other's believers and the word again sympatheo . It means to have fellow feelings with , to be touched and moved with the feelings of another's infirmities , to share in the sufferings of another , to experience tender compassion with another , to experience the painful experiences and miseries of another . So it's kind of like you're entering someone's world and , even though sometimes you don't intimately understand , you can say , generally speaking , I've been through tough times , I've gone through pain . It hurts .
Ray ComfortEver stubbed your toe ? Really bad , oh yeah , that is so painful . So when Seusses have just stubbed my toe , I'm empathetic . Yeah , I don't laugh .
Emeal ZwayneWhat as he cracks up now You're going all hot , right , you're going all Reed .
Oscar NavarroYeah , speaking of laughing , I was just talking to friends of ours their faithful listeners , brian and Linda , and they were telling me this story about how Brian had this excruciating
sunburn . It was so bad , and he asks his wife , linda , to put aloe vera on his back , and so she's starting to rub it onto his back . He's like , oh , it burns . And she's like , oh , knock it off , it's just aloe vera . And she looked and it was . It was .
Ray ComfortKerosene ? No , basically it was rubbing alcohol Hand sanitizer .
Emeal ZwayneOh boy , you know , some lady convinced my sister when she was younger . She put like I think it was something like cooking oil on her body before she went out sunbathing at the beach . It totally burned her body it was horrible .
Ray ComfortThere's an old wives' tale if I can say wives' tale that butter on a burn is supposed to help it . But that's a myth .
Oscar NavarroAnd then you go back outside .
Emeal ZwayneYeah , yeah , you think of the tragedies that people face from just listening to advice , or like they used to drill holes in your skull when you had a headache .
Oscar NavarroThat's real . No , that is real . We have , like we find mummified bodies that had drilled drilled holes into their skulls because they thought it would relieve pressure for don't knock it till , you try it yeah , oscar , i'm'll bust out the drill guys .
Emeal ZwayneYeah , so .
Ray ComfortI'll tell my dentist next time .
Emeal ZwayneSo 1 Peter 3.8, . Finally , all of you , be like-minded , be sympathetic , love one another , be compassionate and humble . So , Oscar , there we have an imperative from Scripture , and the Word of God is telling us be sympathetic . And I think this kind of ties together . When you're like-minded , it creates sympathy in you , you know , and tied to that is love , because when you're sympathetic you end up showing love . That creates compassion . And I think it's all connected to a heart of humility of just saying look , I'm your servant , so how can I come alongside you ? That's good .
Oscar NavarroI wonder about the person who struggles with sympathy . They might be asking like where do I get the power to sympathize with other people ? And I would say you need to look to Christ and see that he was sympathetic towards you . Hebrews 4 , verse 15 , for we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weakness . God does not just stand over and above human suffering and human weakness . He is the God who laid down his crown and willingly stepped into our human suffering . He was the God who experienced homelessness Matthew 8 , 20 .
Oscar NavarroHis family thought he was crazy . His best friends turned their back on him . One of his closest confidants sold him for a pocket change . He stood face to face with the devil and endured demonic tricks . He dealt with death . He endured gossip and slander . He endured suffering for righteous sake . He was shamed publicly . He experienced periods of hunger . He received criticism over his ministry . His theology was mocked . His message was rejected . His preaching was critiqued . His disciples his closest friends didn't get it . Disciples , his closest friends didn't get it . And furthermore , worst of it all , or the one that matters most , he endured complete separation from God . Why did he endure ? Complete separation from God ? Which he says on the cross . My God , my God , why have you forsaken me so that we would not have to experience that separation from God ? He is our savior , who sympathizes with our weaknesses and with our needs , and through that sympathy we have salvation . That is the power we have to sympathize with other people .
Emeal ZwayneYeah , hebrews 4 is one of my absolute favorites , and then Hebrews 2 , 17 to 18 , and therefore , in all things he had to be made like his brethren that he might be a merciful and faithful high priest and things pertaining to God , to make propitiation for the sins of the people . For in that , he himself has suffered , being tempted , he's able to aid those who are tempted , because there's that element of sympathy . It's not just this sort of sentiment , but it's power-packed in that it leads to action , it leads to saying I don't just have it , I want to help you , I want to enter your world and help bring you out of it . You know , john Fawcett , in kind of keeping with what you shared , oscar , he said the Son of God , had he never become incarnate , might have pitied , but he could not have sympathized with his people . To render him capable of sympathy , it was necessary that he should become man , that he might be susceptible to suffering , and that he should actually be a sufferer , that he might be susceptible to sympathy .
Emeal ZwayneYeah , so , ray , there are times when we are busy , we have a lot going on , and there is what I call the get-a-grip syndrome that I think we can sometimes have as believers , like , come on , get a grip . It's something we haven't gone through personally and we just quickly want to just try to shoot a few things out at a person . But I remember you calling me before even Rachel and I had started our relationship , we'd just become friends . I remember I was sick and you called me just to check on me and there was such a sympathy . I've always noticed that about you when someone isn't feeling well , you have a deep sympathy . What's that about , ray ?
Ray ComfortI have no idea .
Emeal ZwayneI don't know , because of my kidney stain . What's that about , ray ? I have no idea , I don't know .
Ray ComfortBecause of my kidney stain . I sympathize with everybody now . I looked ahead to my kidney stone that was coming when I called you that day , but I think it's something that we have to bring into our witnessing encounters with unsaved people .
Emeal ZwayneWow .
Ray ComfortTo see their perspectives . I was witnessing to a homosexual just yesterday and he said I'm a Christian , I love the Lord , I just don't believe the Bible . And I had to come on heavy with him because of that fact . I said how can you love the Lord and not read the Bible ? But I had to at the same time think of his perspective because he's coming with this baggage in mind . He knows he said I know religious people and they're very harsh . And I says I hope I haven't come across as harsh today . He says no , not at all .
Ray ComfortSo we have to pull that sympathetic tone into our witnessing by seeing unsaved people's perspectives . I think I love the Bible verse that says a servant of the Bible , verse that says a servant of the Lord must not strive but be gentle unto all men , because Satan's blinded their minds . They haven't got a clue what we're talking about . The God of this world is blind in the minds . Except a man be born again , he cannot see the kingdom of God . So what we're talking about is like light to a blind man , and so we've got to sympathize with their perspective . They cannot see what we're talking about .
Oscar NavarroWow , so um this kind of that . You're reminding me of something , ray , which I I probably shared on episode 50 , uh , and it kind of goes along with what you were talking about earlier , mark um , which , for those of you maybe who came on , started listening . More recently , I had a sister 13 years younger than me , sweet , just one of my closest friends . She passed away , took her own life a number of years ago and in the midst of her struggle with depression and anxiety , at one point she wanted to get a job . You know , when you're struggling with depression , you tend to isolate yourself , which is the worst thing that you can do . And so at one point she was ambitious . She wanted to get a job where she'd be in front of people . So she went and got a job at Disneyland , hoping that just the interaction with other people would help pull her out of her desire to isolate . And sometimes she'd come home and she'd just have like the greatest day . People were so kind and nice . But other times she'd come home and she'd just have like the greatest day . People were so kind and nice , but other times she'd become , she'd come home and she was treated like garbage , like trash , you know , um , and I mean when she would get anxiety . She would just , full blown shiver , fall into the fetal position . There was just nothing you can do other than just pray and wait for that moment to pass . You know , she had just no control over her body . And so , speaking of sympathy , and I think those experiences open your eyes to the world around you , it causes you to be less self-aware and more selfless and aware of others
.
Oscar NavarroBecause years ago , after she passed away , I remember I was at a coffee shop and I was running late . And dare I be late to work or easy will torture me . Yeah , I ordered a cup of coffee and I'm waiting for it . It's taking longer than it should . And I noticed the barista . Her hands are shaking and I start to realize , man , this poor girl .
Oscar NavarroI don't know her story . She may have had one of those mornings where she just couldn't understand how to take another breath , how to get out of her own bed , and yet she had the courage to show up to work this morning . And I'm going to be frustrated because my cup of coffee is taking too much two minutes longer . What if the Lord gave me that moment with her , to to show her grace , to build rapport , to be kind towards her , to slide her a tract right and instead to think selfishly and just add to her frustration , add to her anxiety . And so , instead of being frustrated , I leaned over and I asked her how her day was going and told her I'd like to pray for her . And so sympathy also is the Lord , just opening your eyes to the needs of the people around you , and it causes you to stop thinking about yourself and start noticing others .
Emeal ZwayneOh , oscar , that story , you've shared it before . It always touches me and it convicts me because it reminds me of how many times I have that mindset . You know , because we're so self-centered , it's my agenda , it's my routine , it's my inconvenience that I want to avoid . And there are precious souls before us , bearing the image of God , that we have the opportunity to impact . And it just takes a shift in our mind and that one moment just , I'm going to do this differently .
Ray ComfortThe love of God flows from me like a river , until someone cuts me off on a freeway .
Emeal ZwayneI know , I know , that happened to me the other day and it just rose up in me .
Ray ComfortIt was just like I never get too upset , I just shoot a couple of shots above the head .
Emeal ZwayneAnd yeah , I just like the temptation is just to do something . You understand why road rage happens . You know people don't have self-control .
Mark SpenceMy daughter . We had a similar situation driving along and this person was driving crazy and we're going on the side island is that what it's called the shoulder Shoulder Going around us and was just driving crazy and I was like frustrated , you could tell , and my daughter goes I hope everything's okay with that person . Well , that's the other thing .
Emeal ZwayneI'm like , oh , yeah , that's what I was thinking too . Everything is okay . Yeah , mark , don't you think sometimes we act like crippled people who are pointing the finger and laughing and making ?
Ray Comfortfun of Is crippled , a correct way to put it nowadays .
Emeal ZwayneWe're disabled people pointing our finger . He means it like in the 90s . Thanks for ruining my whole analogy , guys . I thought it was fine .
Emeal ZwayneThis was an emotional moment here , yeah , they're really crippled , they're invalids , they're invalid , but really , though , someone who's disabled pointing at someone else who's disabled and making fun of them and laughing at them , and when you have the exact same thing , I mean in the general sense , man , we're all fallen and broken and sometimes we get frustrated rather than being sympathetic . And I'd love you to speak to Romans 12 , 15 , rejoice with those who rejoice and weep with those who weep .
Mark SpenceYeah , I love this . I spoke at an event the other day and I didn't accept the honorarium . I gave the honorarium back and he went on and on about how much they need the honorarium themselves to do the work that they're doing . When I was all done , this lady came up to me and put a stack of hundreds into my hand I don't even know how much it was and I quickly shoved it into the pocket of this missionary who just gave his testimony before I was done speaking , and the way that kind of went down right was such a beautiful moment . It's not me , right . Somebody's going through something . What can I practically do to help them out in this situation ? They're weeping . You weep with them , right ? They're rejoicing , rejoice . Your time will come , or your time has come . When my wife is going through something , I ask her a question . All the time I'll say do you want compassion or do you want a solution ? Because I don't know at this time what you want . I don't want solutions , mark .
Ray ComfortThey don't . A lot of times they just don't want solutions .
Mark SpenceCompassion , they want compassion , they want that bent ear , they want you to just be there , to be that shoulder , and I think that it's not easy .
Ray ComfortIt's not easy for a man because we're solution people .
Oscar NavarroThat's right . I did the other day the laundry .
Mark SpenceNo , you're good . That leads into the next thing I was going to say . Oh good no , which is just simply don't speak before somebody's done speaking .
Mark SpenceIt is actually my point that I was going to make . Oh , that's funny , and the idea is to listen actively . Right To our shame , we will over-talk someone and we want somebody to stop speaking , because we already know what we want to share . Or we want to share our story that is similar to their story , but it is one up on them , me , me , me , me . We need to slow down because it conveys a message . When you do not overtake them in the conversation , you don't know the direction they're heading . You don't know if they're going to head a whole other direction , if they're still painting a picture within the story .
Mark SpencePeople feel undervalued if their voice is not heard and easy . How many times have I gone to you and I've said he's , I just want to make sure you have all of the facts before you make the decision and then , once you make the decision man , I'm cool man , everything is great . I just want to make sure you have all the facts . You understand this right and you understand what I'm saying . Can you reiterate what I just said ? Yep , man , it's , it is well with my soul . Facts , you understand this right and you understand what I'm saying . Can you reiterate what I just said ? Yep , man , it is well with my soul , bro . You do whatever you need to do to make the decision . That that's well . But when you start cutting people off , you start you're just like I'm undervalued , you know which makes me underappreciated and you're not going to make the right decision . But man , slow down .
Emeal ZwayneYeah , and then you also miss out on on gaining wisdom too that could be dispensed by that other person , like you're listening to bless them . But there's also that by-product blessing of learning something , whether you're , you know , working with someone who's struggling with something or just going through pain , or someone who's giving you counsel or advice . So , yeah , that's that's hugely important and you know there , hugely important . And there's that element of , I think , oftentimes forgetting that , yeah , we can weep with those who weep right , we think about that and that's kind of like the one we focus on out of that verse . Weep with those who weep yeah , that's hard , I gotta weep .
Emeal ZwayneBut rejoice with those who rejoice , that sounds like , yeah , that's easy to do . But rejoice with those who rejoice , that sounds like , yeah , that's easy to do . It's not often , because the element of jealousy can enter in and I think in the whole realm of sympathy there's that aspect of fellowship and communion and being bonded , so to push ourselves , even in rejoicing , like to just say , wow , this person just got blessed with all this money or with this promotion or or these gift cards to take away , or with $6,000 worth of gift cards , yeah , we're so happy for you , Ray .
Mark SpenceYeah , Ray , Thanks Thomas .
Emeal ZwayneYeah and so , but to be able to will ourselves there and say , no , I'm going to rejoice because that's what love does . We're so focused on us , it's so disgusting and we need to get beyond that .
Oscar NavarroIt was so helpful to hear you . I've heard you say before like our wives need compassion over solution . I've been able to apply that the other day . The dishes were just to the top and I just looked at Kelly and I go . I know you don't want a solution right now , so I'm just going to give you compassion .
Ray ComfortSo you later do the dishes ?
Emeal ZwayneWhat a nice man Oscar , yeah , so , yeah , so you got nothing to say .
Ray ComfortI'm so thrown off by .
Emeal ZwayneOscar's wickedness , I can't even move forward .
I love this quote here .
Emeal ZwayneThis is by FB Meyer . He said To know Christ in the storm of battle , to know him in the valley of shadow , to know him when the solar light radiates our faces or when they are darkened with disappointment and sorrow . To know the sweetness of his dealing with bruised reeds and smoking flax , to know the tenderness of his sympathy and the strength of his right hand . All this involves many verities of experience on our part , but each of them like the facets of a diamond or reflect the prismatic beauty of his glory from a new angle .
Oscar NavarroThat's really good .
Emeal ZwayneAnd you know , going back to what we started with Oscar , you , oscar . It comes back to remembering the sympathy that Christ has toward us . I mean , if God is sympathetic with human beings that are so far removed from him , I mean you think of the gap between us and some people whose lives we don't understand . I mean , how do you even compare that to infinity ? Because that's holy God versus wicked , wretched , depraved sinner . And not only does he sympathize , he became one of us , barring the sinful nature in every way , to sympathize with us and to save us , and then to come alongside us and help us . I mean think of what 1 John says this was written so that you may not sin . These things were written so you may not sin , but if anyone sins , we have an advocate with the Father , jesus Christ the righteous . That word means one who comes alongside to help .
Ray ComfortCounsel for our defense .
Mark SpenceYeah , mark , you know we talk about the practical steps . I gave one practical step about being an active listener . Here's a couple more practical steps if you want to grow in sympathy towards people . One is to ask thoughtful questions , right , and that is you know . Is there anything that I can practically do to help you during this time ? I mean , you can read the room We've talked about in the past about somebody's gone through something .
Mark SpenceYou don't even need to ask them if you could bring them a meal . You just bring them a meal . You're just stepping out to do things , and that is coming from somebody who really has empathized , right , they've been through something , so you're able to do that . Next is just to simply be patient with someone as they're going through something .
Mark SpenceI saw a TED Talk from a secularist who was suffering the death of her husband , and about five years had gone by or so , and her friends are going up to her and saying what else ? What's your problem ? You know , I mean just move on already . Oh , and she said I learned a valuable lesson as my friends were saying move on , and it's not move on . We're saying move on , and it's not move on , it's move forward . Right , what are you practically doing to move forward in the midst of your situation ? I don't know what you're going through , I can't empathize , but I just want to make sure that you're to Oscar's point you're not being deserted in a corner , you're being alone , but you're in fellowship . You're actively still walking in the work which God has prepared beforehand . How are you moving forward ? What is the game plan as you do what you're doing ? Very practical steps , right . So listen actively , ask thoughtful questions and be patient with someone as they go through what they're going through . That's great , mark .
Emeal ZwayneYeah , that's so needed , man , you know , because we , we , we don't pause enough , we don't stop enough to to just say , look , this is real to this person , you know it's real to them and it's something that we may even have gone through but we forget . Time kind of wipes it out of our heart and mind and we need to just stop and say , no , this is really real and I'm going to enter this person's world and come alongside them and help them . And here's the final thing I want to say as we wrap up Understand that there is value in your suffering , beyond just what God may be doing for His glory and what he may be doing in you , for you . Ultimately , everything is for God's glory . But think beyond that to what God wants to do through your suffering for others .
Emeal ZwayneWe've alluded to it lightly , but this quote by John Fawcett is just so powerful . He said a spirit of sympathy toward our companions in tribulation . They give occasion for the exercise of patience , meekness , submission and resignation . Were it not for the wholesome and necessary discipline of affliction , these excellent virtues would lie dormant . Afflictions serve to convince us more deeply of our own weakness and insufficiency and to endear the person the grace , the promises and the salvation of our Redeemer more insufficiency and to endear the person , the grace , the promises and the salvation of our Redeemer more and more to our hearts .
Mark SpenceMark let me give a biblical illustration of what we're talking about here , which is so great . It's an unlikely biblical character . It's not a hero inside of a story , often a villain . We see in Genesis , chapter 16 , verses 7 through 13 . It's the story of Hagar , the Egyptian servant of Sarah . She flees into the desert to escape the harsh treatment from Sarai . Later to become Sarah , she encounters the angel of the Lord who addresses her by name love . This listens to her in her distress and the angel tells her to return to Sarah and promises her that her descendants will be too numerous to count . And then what does Hagar do ? Names the Lord , el Roy , the God who sees me .
Mark SpenceI don't know what people are going through , I don't know the situation , the circumstances . I know that God has pre-appointed our boundaries and the timing of our habitation so that we yearn for him , so that we groan for him . Right , there's a point and purpose . And maybe you don't have the community and the fellowship that koinonia , that maybe we have or other people have , because of where you live or your situation with your family , but there is a God who sees , right . So what are your options ? You have two options here . Where are you going to go , because he alone holds the words to eternal life . It's not an option to go back to Egypt and to give up , to go back to the place of slavery , where you are held captive by the idols and these lowercase g gods . Your option is really singular and that is march forward on your knees , knowing that there's a God who sees , he sees and he knows .
Mark SpenceAmen .
Emeal ZwayneWell put , mark , and a great place to wrap this up . You know we need to yeah , we need to step back . We need to remember our part in the body of Christ , to be those that are conduits through which he works in his sympathy , to minister to other people , by us showing our sympathy because we've received it from him , and the impact of that can be absolutely massive . All right , this is one of those where we end on a sober note . Friends , I can't even remember what the resource was , but check out livingwaterscom . Thanks for joining us . We'll see you here next time on the Living Waters podcast .