Defying the Odds: How Ellen Busch Turned Her Dyslexia to Her Advantage

Have you heard these myths about dyslexia? 

• Myth #1: Dyslexia means you're not smart. 
• Myth #2: Dyslexia is just a reading problem.
•  Myth #3: Dyslexia is a childhood problem that you outgrow. 

These myths can be damaging to individuals with dyslexia, causing low self-esteem and a lack of empowerment. The truth is, dyslexia affects reading, writing, and spelling, but it does not reflect intelligence. Furthermore, dyslexia is a lifelong condition that can also bring unique strengths and talents. Join memoirist Ellen Busch as she shares her personal journey with dyslexia and how she has turned it into her advantage.

In this episode, you will be able to:

• Learn the significant role supportive parents and communities play in the success and well-being of individuals with dyslexia.
• Uncover the unique thought processes of people with dyslexia and how they can leverage these strengths in various aspects of life.
• Understand the importance of lifelong personal development and investment for both individuals with dyslexia and society at large.
• Gain insights on overcoming challenges, boosting self-confidence, and investing in yourself.

Meet Ellen Busch, an inspiring memoirist whose lived experience with dyslexia has transformed her into a strong advocate for neurodiversity. In her memoir, Disempowered: How I Turned an Academic Death Sentence into My Life's Greatest Adventure, Ellen recounts the struggles she faced throughout her education and how she eventually earned not only a bachelor's degree in Health Science but also an MBA from Southern New Hampshire University. As a former EMT and adventurer with hobbies ranging from scuba diving to skiing, Ellen is determined to uplift other dyslexic individuals and help them embrace their unique strengths.

• Ellen Busch's memoir, (dis)Empowered How I Turned an Academic Death Sentence into My Life's Greatest Adventure https://www.amazon.com/dis-Empowered-Academic-Sentence-Adventure-ebook/dp/B0BZ5PG9NY/ref=sr_1_fkmr2_1?crid=5DNSK88VJGM0&keywords=ellen+busch+disempowered&qid=1680810170&sprefix=ellen+busch+disempowered%2Caps%2C343&sr=8-1-fkmr2
• The Dyslexic Advantage https://www.amazon.com/Dyslexic-Advantage-Revised-Updated-Unlocking/dp/0593472233/ref=sr_1_1?crid=32CTLKGCWM884&keywords=dyslexic+advantage+book&qid=1686273694&sprefix=dyslexic%2Caps%2C118&sr=8-1
• The anatomy coloring book mentioned in the episode: https://www.amazon.com/Anatomy-Coloring-Book-Wynn-Kapit/dp/0321832019/ref=sr_1_3?crid=3BVNUUGYPNDVC&keywords=anatomy+coloring+book&qid=1686273764&sprefix=anatomy%2Caps%2C107&sr=8-3

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Transcript

00:00:00            

I'm Jessica Kidwell and this is Neuroversity, a space to expand our understanding and knowledge about neurodiversity and to elevate neurodivergent voices and experiences. My guest today is Ellen Busch. Ellen works in the medical technology industry, is a former EMT, has her bachelor's degree in Health Science and an MBA from Southern New Hampshire University City. She's an advanced open water scuba diver, an avid hiker, and a former ski instructor. Ellen is also dyslexic and spent most of her education experience feeling broken.         

00:00:37
             
Her recently published memoir, Disempowered How I Turned an Academic Death Sentence into My Life's Greatest Adventure, is recently published. Ellen is passionate about helping people who are dyslexic and understanding that they are not broken, which is why I'm so happy to elevate her story today on Neurodiversity. Ellen, welcome. I really appreciate you being here. Thank you.         

00:01:02
              

It's an honor, and I do appreciate it. So, Ellen, why don't you start off by just telling me a little bit about you and with this being a Neurodivergent focused podcast, dyslexia being one of the neurotypes under that umbrella, I'd love to hear about when you realized and got the label of dyslexic. Well, I grew up in the New York City area. I'm originally from Kismet Fire Island, and my parents moved to Westchester County croat mount Hudson specifically, which had some of the best school systems in New York State. It was the 70s when I went through the education system, and it was apparent immediately that I was ambidextrous and I did not have what was believed at that point was a dominant eye.         

00:02:05
              

And I went through all kinds of tests and they did not want me to begin to learn to read because I didn't have a dominant eye, because they felt that. And I don't know if this is still the feeling I suspect it's not, but not having the dominant eye meant I couldn't track words across a page. That was the belief system. It was around that time, first or second grade, that I was also given the WISD test. And I was, at that point, diagnosed as Dyslexic.         

00:02:40
              

And this was in the 70s, which is I'm not going to say surprising, but Dyslexia definitely is not something currently that is well caught by our education system. So I'm actually kind of impressed that in the public school system you were in in the 70s that they were able to diagnose you at such a young age. And it's a testament to the quality of the school. Unfortunately, the bias and assumptions against Dyslexic people really were awful. I was written off immediately.         

00:03:26
              

My parents told me this story after I finished my bachelor's degree about a parent teacher conference when I was must have been first or second grade, right around that diagnosis time frame. And the administrator sat my parents down and told me that I would not be successful in life. And they said I might be able to finish high school but college was out of the question. It was a good thing that I was a pretty little girl because they should focus on finding me a husband to take care of me. So it's this assumption of intellectual disability, as opposed to a processing of the way that letters and numbers line up that is upsetting, to say the least.         

00:04:19
              

And it has had lifelong consequences for me. When you take a perfectly healthy, emotionally healthy, physically healthy, loved child and you take away her potential, you take away her self esteem or her self worth, what kind of chance does that little girl have in life? And for me, that led to chronic low self esteem, not believing I was worthy, not believing that I was worth defending. And that created a whole lifetime, 45 years of struggle. And it was really destructive and traumatic for me.         

00:05:16
              

So as you move through this public school system in the 70s, how were you able to push back, or were your parents able to push back on this extremely low bar of expectation from you, from the system in which you're in? Right. And I really have to give my parents credit. They were amazing people as individuals, and they were amazing parents, and they just flat out refused to accept what the teachers were saying. And my mother at the time was a stay at home mom.         

00:05:56
              

She became very involved in the school. I don't even know if they still do this anymore, but she was a class mother, so she would be in the classroom with me often. And she was involved and helped me every step of the way. My father, who was an army veteran, understood the value of learning outside of the classroom and taught me everything he knew. I remember teaching me at a very young age to pilot his boat, which meant that I was learning to navigate, read the water, pay attention to the environment and my relationship to the environment.         

00:06:42
              

I remember standing on an upside down bucket so I could reach the steering wheel and see the compass. They were involved every step of the way. My mom would sit down and help me with my homework every day. And my frustration was just very hard to handle, especially at such a young age. I would often end up in tears, throwing my pencil and my homework across the table.         

00:07:09
              

She would calm me down, get me some water, and we would go back to work. And I just learned how to do these work through these challenges step by step by step, one question at a time. And did it ever get easier, or did your coping mechanisms just become so rote? I think both. With the Wis test, I was tested every, I would say, two to three years.         

00:07:44
              

And as I got a little bit older, the test indicated that I scored at the 99th percentile in abstract reasoning and the 98th percentile in logic. And I remember my mother sitting me down and sharing with me these test results, and I knew I had a fighting chance. My mother used to say, and I think this is so accurate, Ellen, you're obviously highly intelligent. It's just that they don't know how to teach you. And I think she was absolutely 100% right.         

00:08:23
              

And the system that still struggles to teach different learners, the way in which positive reinforcement happens is by excelling in one style of learning. And here you are surrounded by loving parents who are pulling you through a system that was not built for you, and still the trauma of feeling less than was crippling. You have the beauty of parents who wanted and were able to take the time to see you as a whole person, but because of the system that you grew up in, it was not enough to just have them. Can you remember like, middle school or high school ways in which this lack of self worth would rear its ugly head? Yes.         

00:09:41
              

So I also had a minor speech impediment, which made me the target of bullies, which, as I understand, is very common. I just didn't believe in myself. I'm going to rephrase that. I had this terrible internal conflict because I knew that I was capable, I knew that I was smart, but yet all the evidence of every test failure was telling me the opposite. So there was a lot of self sabotage.         

00:10:17
              

When I got into high school, I was listening to the teachers who were saying I wasn't going to go to college, I wasn't capable. And something in me shifted and I said no. I guess you could say I have a little bit of a defiant streak, which comes in handy. And I just decided that I didn't care what they thought. I was going to work hard even if I had failures.         

00:10:46
              

I was going to give it everything I had. Do you remember that shift happening? You can recall before and after that shift. I think it was always there subtly in the background. And it was also because of my parents.         

00:11:06
              

My dad was a cheerleader and he would say to me, Ellen, you know, you can do it. Prove him wrong. Prove him wrong. And that became a mantra. And when I would get stressed out or upset, I would talk with them.         

00:11:21
              

They would let me talk openly and freely. They never judged my feelings. They never made me feel bad about what I was feeling or that something I was feeling was wrong. Just total support. So can we try to describe for the average listener and for those of us who are not dyslexic, can you talk about where the difficulty shows up the most and when the frustration gets the highest?         

00:11:58
              

Sure. So I'm definitely a slower reader, so it takes me more time. So having the accommodations of untimed tests is extremely important. The other thing is, I have virtually no short term memory. My long term memory is excEllent.         

00:12:23
              

Now, is that indicative of dyslexia in general or is that specific to the type that you have or some other co occurring condition? It's my understanding that that's common among people who are dyslexic and it actually become having an excEllent long term memory actually becomes a huge advantage. Well, and if you think about the way most I mean, I'm just going to talk about my own schooling experience with a typically developing mind. Short term memory is how you get through everything and then it immediately leaves my brain like you cram for a test. You memorize what you need to know for the unit that you're working on, right?         

00:13:10
              

Then you achieve the ability to parrot that back, either verbally or written. And then it's like gone. Never to be remembered by my brain potentially again. I know that for a fact now that I have high school age children and I think, no, I have no idea what you're learning whatsoever. Of course, for me there's just virtually no rope memory.         

00:13:42
              

And the school system when I went through it was based almost entirely on rote memory.         

00:13:51
              

Understanding concepts, relationships, gist is a strength of mine, but the short term memory just isn't there. And I still lose my keys in my coffee cup all the time. So the system was built to focus on my weaknesses, not on my strengths. And I didn't understand that. And the perception of that is the child is not paying attention, the child is not intelligent and it's not about that at all.         

00:14:31
              

And as I grew older, when we started getting into the sciences and the social studies, I thrived because those are big concepts, those are ideas, and those I could get easily, whereas other people might have struggled in that area. The irony isn't lost on me that a system is in place to teach short term memory and task oriented success, when in fact, the higher education institutions that we revere are looking for students who can make those types. Of abstract and logic connections and actually aren't all that interested in making sure you have the Timestable memorized or the order of the President.         

00:15:36
              

That's been the case for 100 plus however many years the public school system has been in place that we are so focused on task and repetition. And yet the greatest success for advanced academic studies is this ability that you just described of getting the gist, making the connections. So you became more and more successful the farther in school you progressed, despite the fact that everyone early on was saying you would never progress that far. Absolutely. That's 100% correct.         

00:16:21
              

And in fact, when I got to college, that was the first time I was fully mainstreamed and it got easier and easier and easier. I still had to work harder than everybody else because there was still places where rote memory was important, specifically taking anatomy when you have to remember every muscle in its origin and insertion, which was incredibly difficult for me, but I got through it. And the interesting way that I got through it is a textbook, and it's actually an anatomy coloring book. I don't know if you're familiar with it, but the name of the muscle is in a bubble. So you color in the bubble, and then you color the muscle that has that name with the same color.         

00:17:20
              

So I would memorize the color as well as the name, and the color helped me to remember it. And when I would sit through an exam, I would visualize that page in my head and remember the color and the name, and that's how I got through it. Now, from a story of your life standpoint, did you go straight from your bachelor's degree into your MBA, or was there a space of time before you made that additional education jump? There was quite a bit of space of time. I graduated with my bachelor's in 92, and then I went to graduate school, and I went part time.         

00:18:08
              

I completed that in 2001, so there was quite a bit of time in between. I never believed that I could earn a master's degree. My sister did exactly the track that you were referencing. She went from her bachelor's to her master's, and I thought, wow, she can do it. I can do it.         

00:18:28
              

So she really motivated me. Or inspired me is probably a better word. Is she also dyslexic? No. Okay.         

00:18:36
              

I was just curious if that's where the motivation came from. No, but I just knew that we were the same and we were equally intelligent. She definitely inspired me. And then I was working for a startup during the.com boom, and employers were throwing benefits at people, and one of the benefits they were offering was tuition reimbursement, including books, everything. They covered all the fees.         

00:19:06
              

So southern New Hampshire University, which was New Hampshire College, was right nearby. And I thought, you know what? I'm just going to go take one class and just see how I do. And I got an A, and I couldn't believe it, and I thought, well, that worked. Let's take another class.         

00:19:25
              

I had nothing to lose. I wasn't paying for it. So I just went part time in the evenings and just worked through it one class at a time. It took me about five years, took a long time, but I enjoyed it, and I made lots of friends. That's the thing that is probably interesting from my standpoint, is to think about the kids that I know right now who are dyslexic and talking with you.         

00:20:01
              

School is terrible. It's hard. It is frustrating. And you feel that internal conflict that you describe where, you know, you're intelligent, but you keep getting data points that perhaps you're not. I can almost feel that transformation of adult Ellen sitting in that first classroom and getting that a and thinking, well, this isn't supposed to happen.         

00:20:37
              

Exactly.         

00:20:40
              

Yeah. It was powerful. I love to learn. And that was one of the things that drove me. I'm intensely curious.         

00:20:51
              

One personality test that I took actually indicated that curiosity was my number one trait, which I was very surprised about. But yes, elementary school in particular. The way I wrote about it in my book, it was a dangerous, hostile environment because there were three things going on. There was, one, the bullies. Two, the teachers who didn't believe in me.         

00:21:16
              

Now, I do want to say that I did have some excEllent teachers who really did believe me and didn't see me as broken and disabled. It was more of the administrators who just wanted to put me in that bucket of, don't worry about her, she's not going to be successful. Just get her through. But I love to learn. And I was curious.         

00:21:39
              

I spent a lot of time with my mother, in particular in the museums in New York City. I've been to the museum in Natural History so many times I could be a tour guide. But that fostered my learning, that fostered my curiosity. And even though I couldn't read the plaques, my mom would read them to me. You said there were three things.         

00:22:03
              

So it was the bullying, the teachers, and what was the third? Just the constant evidence of not doing well in the testing process. I was the kid who raised their hand and answered every question, but then when it came to the test, I failed miserably, inconsistently. So I want to touch a little bit on the additional parts of your personal story because I think that we can focus on the impact that it has on people's self esteem. When you are pushed into a system that is not built for you, it can have impact on the potential that you have academically.         

00:22:51
              

But I think it's important to also talk about how it impacts other aspects of your life. So when you described earlier that you are a perfectly healthy, happy, well loved little girl who then receives pretty regular feedback that you are less than that, even with a family of support and a life of privilege, you fell victim to some pretty terrible personal situations, do you attribute those two things to each other? Absolutely. Okay.         

00:23:42
              

When you have low self esteem and low self worth, and you're basically a second class citizen with the learning disabled label, to go out into the world and get a job and try and build a career is extremely difficult. And in addition, the low self esteem made me the target of predators and bullies and I mean managers who bullied me, I mean coworkers who bullied me. I didn't believe that I had the right to defend myself because I wasn't worth defending. That's what I believed. And it was so deep in my blueprint or my psyche that I didn't even realize it was there.         

00:24:37
              

And it wasn't until I did a tremendous amount of work, actually just a few years ago, where I came to understand that and just discard it. But wouldn't it be amazing if that imprint didn't have to happen? And I think about how you made sure that you acknowledged that you did have some wonderful teachers, which thank goodness for it, but that is a luck of the draw situation. And I guess my hope is that these types of conversations and telling these types of stories helps move the culture, which then moves the system to have that be the norm. And the luck of the draw would be like the bad luck of the draw that every once in a while there's a misinformed or bad teacher that the system then writes, as opposed to few and far between teachers who want to see children as whole beings as opposed to task completing beings.         

00:26:00
              

Yes, that is why I've written my book and why I'm speaking out at every opportunity. It's not an intelligence issue. And when we start to look at historical figures who we know or generally accept that they were dyslexic, the list is extraordinary. I mean, among that list is Albert Einstein, Winston Churchill, General Patton, President Kennedy, perhaps even General Washington. President Washington.         

00:26:40
              

It's extraordinary. And one of the things I've heard is that dyslexia is so common at MIT. They call it the MIT disease. Now, I beg to differ with the term disease, but I get the point. It is common.         

00:26:57
              

I've also read that 50% of the scientists at NASA are dyslexic. Wow, that's pretty extraordinary. And the British intelligence services actively recruit people who are documented as dyslexic because they have abilities that other people don't have. Specifically, they see connections and gist that most people miss. I mean, that's the promised land, right?         

00:27:29
              

Exactly. That we move to this neurodiverse affirming belief that the different ways in which brains think is actually a strength as opposed to something that people need to try to stamp out or hide about themselves. And that's another reason for your book, right? Exactly. It is.         

00:27:52
              

I see it as a superpower. I do not see it as a disability. And I do not believe dyslexia is something that you have. It is something that you are. And our brains just work differently.         

00:28:08
              

And I know for myself that I'm a visual spatial thinker. And this is one of the reasons why I think there are so many rocket scientists who are dyslexic. Because it's like we're born with CAD software. So I can take an image in my mind and I could rotate it. I can turn it upside down, I can take it apart, I can put it together all in my mind just like a piece of CAD software would do.         

00:28:36
              

That's not a disability.         

00:28:39
              

When do you think you made that switch into seeing it as a superpower as opposed to this root cause for poor self esteem. I can tell you exactly what had happened. It was when I read the book. The dyslexic advantage. Oh, wow.         

00:28:58
              

And it is written by two MDS, husband and wife team. And they went around and started interviewing people who are Dyslexic, and they started looking at different strengths and weaknesses as well. And the strengths category is pretty extraordinary. And as I was moving through these pages, I could just see, yep, that's me. Yes, that's me.         

00:29:23
              

Yes, that's me. It was right there in front of me on the pages. It was crystal clear. I always knew that I had abilities that other people didn't have, but now somebody had actually done the research and put it into a book. Well, I will be sure to link in the show notes straight to The Dyslexic Advantage.         

00:29:51
              

Fantastic book. Well, good. That's good to know. So what else are you hoping for your future? I mean, being a published memoirist is a pretty big deal, and I appreciate that you have a hope that telling your story will help elevate the conversation a little bit more and to normalize Dyslexia a little bit more.         

00:30:20
              

But what else are you hoping to do as far as for the future? I'm hoping to share with people how I did it, how I took each step and healed, took back my self confidence and my self esteem and the way I did it. Now everybody's journey is a little bit different, and this is my hero's journey. And the last part of the hero's journey is to share with the world what you've learned. And that's why I'm doing this.         

00:31:05
              

And I love to be challenged. I love outdoor challenges. And one of the ways that I worked through this was not just with a therapist at doing trauma work, but I've trained with former Navy Seals and also I've worked with a coach who is a supervisory FBI agent. And those events were transformational.         

00:31:38
              

And I think it's important for people to understand that we need to invest in ourselves. And it's not just about working with a therapist. It's about continuing to learn and to grow. And we have to invest in ourselves to do that. I think most of us, if we go to college, we invest in our college education.         

00:32:08
              

Maybe we work for a big company that has an off site, goal oriented training program. We may go do that, but how many people really reach out and work with a coach? How many people a life coach or go to events that are going to challenge them, like Outward Bound or the training that I've done with Mark Devines program, the retired Navy Seal?         

00:32:38
              

It's an opportunity to continue that growth process. And I have enjoyed every challenge that I've taken on, and I'm surprised at how much I've grown and transformed. I didn't know that it was even possible to do this. Well, it's interesting when you say that we all need to invest in ourselves, but the key is we have to believe that we're worth investing in. This is where my curiosity really took hold, so I didn't necessarily believe that I was worth it, but my instincts were screaming at me, and I was curious.         

00:33:26
              

Going to train with Mark Devine and his cadre of instructors, most of whom are retired or former Seals. I was curious, and I wanted to get out there and just see what would happen. And I was scared to death the first time I walked into one of those events, but I just knew I had to be there. I would also be scared walking into any event with a lot of retired Navy Seals, I imagine a lot of physical exertion. Yes.         

00:34:04
              

His programs are segmented into different types of programs. Some are very physical challenges, and then some may have a physical component, but they're not focused on that. Okay. So there's a lot of breath work. Mark Devine has also trained in about seven or eight different yoga practices.         

00:34:28
              

So it's about emotional resiliency, mental toughness, as well as the physical and the spiritual side of ourselves. So it's a very well rounded program. Well, Ellen, I feel more informed, I feel inspired, and I'm grateful to you for adding your voice to the environment so that more and more people will feel less alone about their neurotype difference and that this embracing of value of all kinds can only spread if those of us are out here sending it out to spread. My experience moving through the education system was terrible, and it was traumatic, and I don't want anybody to go through what I went through. So if I can use my voice to reach people and help them in any way, then that's what I'm here to do.         

00:35:52
              

I always say, usually at the beginning of the introductions or at the very end of the credits, I always say there's always room for more curious minds to enroll. So clearly that call was to you specifically with your curious mind. Thank you so much, Ellen, for being here. I really, really enjoyed our conversation. Thank you.