The Bowtreader Podcast
Welcome to the Bowtreader Podcast - a journey where bowhunting, brotherhood, and faith come together. Each week, we dive into the heart of the hunt, exploring the lessons learned in the wild and the deeper truths that shape our lives. From chasing game to chasing purpose, we reflect on how faith in Jesus leads us through every season—both in the field and in life.
Join us as we share stories of brotherhood forged through the bowstring, real-life challenges, and the power of community, faith, and perseverance. Whether you're a seasoned bowhunter, a believer, or someone seeking to grow in your journey, this podcast is a place to find strength, wisdom, and inspiration. Together, we'll discover what it means to walk with purpose and a steady aim, no matter what life throws our way.
The Bowtreader Podcast
Ep. 31 - Who Stole My Cheese? Life Transitions Nobody Warns You About
"Life's like a vapor—here today, gone tomorrow." These words resonate deeply throughout this candid exploration of life's unpredictable seasons. Unlike hunting seasons with their clear opening and closing dates, our personal seasons transition without warning. One day you're changing diapers, the next you're watching your child leave home, with no ceremonial moment marking the shift from one phase to another.
The conversation weaves through the challenges and joys of parenting at different stages—from the sleep-deprived early years when simply "keeping everyone alive" feels like achievement, to the delicate balance of letting children experience skinned knees while protecting them from genuine danger. As John puts it, parenting begins as "occupying another country," providing total support before strategically withdrawing as children develop independence. We share personal stories of how boys and girls navigate this territory differently, with boys often claiming independence prematurely while girls seek connection differently.
Beyond parenting, the discussion explores a profound mid-life transition many face: shifting from being a "striver" in our 20s and 30s to becoming more of a wisdom-giving "sage" in later decades. Many resist this change, fearing loss of position or relevance, yet embracing it leads to renewed purpose. This perspective shift represents one of life's great ironies—we only truly understand a season after we've moved beyond it, yet must find meaning while in the midst of it.
Faith emerges as the essential anchor through these transitions. Through biblical examples and personal testimonies, we illustrate how developing trust in something beyond ourselves provides stability when circumstances change. The wisdom shared offers a refreshing counterpoint to our culture's frantic pace: "If it's not going to matter in 30-60 days, don't worry about it." This perspective helps listeners focus on what truly matters while navigating their own changing seasons with purpose and hope.
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okay, here we go, listen, you hear that there's no liquid death, that's exactly right, it's not there it's not there. Sorry, dub, sorry, you feel bad buddy yep, yep, so dub's not here this morning, so we didn't get our our uh, what has apparently become the signature pop-a-top there? Yeah, that's funny. Anyway, yeah, I think he's on the last day of whatever he's got. Yeah, good. But anyway, you know, dub, when he gets sick man, he usually burns hot Really. I mean, he'll get a fever and he'll hit 101 just randomly.
Speaker 1:It's like you know, used to freak us out. I mean not when he was like really little. I guess it would freak us out. The second kid's always you're like.
Speaker 2:I bet You're good. The third one you're like wait, we have a kid. Wait a minute, we've got another kid, yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so anyway. But yeah, he's under the weather. This morning I woke him up and he was like I said, bud, you just get some more sleep. Yeah so, but anyway, all right. So today we are going to talk about seasons of life.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you know, we talk about hunt seasons all the time. We love hunt season, whatever it is, whether it's turkey season or quail season or deer season or whatever it is. We've got all these seasons that we love. When we really stop and think about it, we're living through seasons as well, whereas our hunting seasons are very defined, you know. We know what day is going to open and we know what day it's going to close.
Speaker 1:The seasons we go through in life are not as defined for us. Like, so I've, I've got, I've got two kids and a wife, and my kids are 20 and going to be 17 here in a couple months. And, like, I knew when I was going to see my child for the first time, right, and I knew I was going to be changing diapers and all that kind of stuff, but I didn't know when I was going to change my last diaper, I didn't know when that season was going to be changing diapers and all that kind of stuff. But I didn't know when I was going to change my last diaper. I didn't know when that season was going to end. It's just like dang it's over. I was not sad that that was over.
Speaker 3:Let me clarify that.
Speaker 1:But you go through these seasons that you don't know how long you're going to be in a particular season. You don't know what it's going to look like, how it's going to affect the rest of your life. Because I can tell you right now, at 17 and 20, 16 and 20, things are a whole lot different than it was when it was two and four. Yeah, right.
Speaker 1:I get so so let's talk through that this morning, you know, in an effort to I mean, we want to build you guys up, we want to build everybody up that's going to listen to this and help you to persevere, right To get to a place where you realize, you know, regardless of what you're going through, it's a season. You know it's not the way, it's going to be forever and ever.
Speaker 2:Amen.
Speaker 1:You know, that's just not the way. That's not the way this world works.
Speaker 3:No absolutely.
Speaker 1:You know. So let's talk through that and what it looks like and we can start wherever y'all want to. Yeah, you know, I've kind of laid the groundwork of what it looks like I mean you hit on a chord because I've got James is two and a half.
Speaker 3:He'll be three in July. We've just hit the milestone of potty training and he is, I mean, as of right now. He hadn't missed Good aim. Yeah, good aim and one in two and everything's going as smoothly as possible. There you go. It's been a been a blessing, but, like you said, I didn't know when my last diaper for him was was gonna be and it sounds silly to even say no, it does, it does.
Speaker 3:But but really when you think about it like we're in the like, my wife and I are in the thick of it. We got a two and a half year old, almost three year old, and then a nine month old baby girl yeah that's like on the verge of crawling and standing up and all the things.
Speaker 3:But like those little, little moments in time, like they're. They're big, they're big milestones, but they're also like we're talking about these transitional times where we're sleep deprived and busy with work and trying to be an actually functioning married couple, um to where we're communicating properly. But we have these two humans we're trying to keep alive and nourished and all the things about you and tara yeah, yeah, exactly sometimes it feels like that's all you're doing.
Speaker 1:It's just keeping everybody alive, just making sure everyone's alive and breathing, oh my gosh.
Speaker 3:Yeah, no, it is. It's crazy and I think for the season we're in right now with James and just kind of the I mean, he's just a little man.
Speaker 1:And it's just crazy.
Speaker 3:It's just crazy to see the little transitions and stuff like that and what he picks up. And now Madeline, she's not talking or anything, but like she sees a dog and like she's got like, she's like doing stuff.
Speaker 1:She's got something to say, she just don't know how to say it. She doesn't know how to say it, but she, it's coming out. It's coming out and it's just like so cool to see that. So, yeah, um, so how does that affect? All right. So so you talked a lot about what it looks like. You know in your, in your nuclear family right now, what all those things look like, all these moving pieces that you've got going on. How's it affecting every other part of your life?
Speaker 3:oh, oh, yeah, no, all right so.
Speaker 1:James is two and a half, so obviously Jace and Tara are not living the same way they were three years ago. Absolutely not Three and a half years ago.
Speaker 3:Yeah we were very selfish and I think that's one thing. With kids, you realize how selfish you are, or just self-centered you are.
Speaker 1:Selfish is good.
Speaker 2:Selfish is good.
Speaker 3:We're here for you. Yeah, that's right. That's right. I think, uh, I mean just speaking on the like, doing the things that I love hunting and fishing and all the things. If you were to have met me seven to ten years ago, um, it was every weekend I was hunting or fishing in some destination, um, or locally, um, we were talking about it earlier. I've turkey hunted twice, uh, in georgia, uh, this season thus far, and it's the 24th of april, um, so, between work and and the season of life, things, things transition.
Speaker 3:I would have probably already limited out with a three turkey limit probably right three kids, but uh yeah, not a bragging, but just like, the amount of time I was able to spend doing what I loved was a lot more time, whereas now I've got little blips on the radar of what I'm able to do, and fortunately my wife recognizes that and and allows me to still do some of that, even though it's it's a sacrifice.
Speaker 3:Um, so, but yeah, I would say the the transition from um pre pre-marriage to just Tara and I, and then now with kids, that those three stages have been pretty abrupt, um, across the board for the most part, but temporarily, uh, it's, it stinks, but I know down the road I'll be able to take james and madeline with me in the woods and hunt and fish and do all the things. It's just it'll be their time, not my time. So, um, I'm really excited about that. Um, james already got him, I got him a little play shotgun and he already walking in the backyard acting like he's shooting woodcock and quail, uh, with the bird dog. So I'm looking forward to that season of life too, and that'll be another transition of introducing them, immersing them into God's creation. So that's good.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's good stuff, brandon, what about you? Where are you?
Speaker 2:at right now. So I'm kind of the opposite end of the spectrum. So I've got one who's already out of the house, engaged, getting married in October, got another one who will be moving out in about a month, month and a half, and then I've got a 14-year-old. So I've got a lot of time If we're not at a ball game or practicing baseball, that if we're not at a ball game or practicing baseball, you know I'm a lot more freed up than I've been in years and years to go. But I remember the stage that jace is talking about where I really didn't even hunt, yeah, oh, yeah, um, until my oldest got to be three or four, two, well, probably three, and I would carry him into a ground blind and usually he would fall asleep on the way to the hunting club.
Speaker 2:in the afternoon I would carry him in on my shoulder, take a sleeping bag, take some gummy bears and something for him to do a coloring book or something and we'd sit in the ground blind together and we actually ended up killing a couple of deer that way, you know, and I was like, oh, that's just kind of the bonus, you know, but just being in the woods and him experiencing that, um, and us doing that together was really cool. Um, but that was about the limit of my hunting at that time. And so you go through those seasons and now some of the guys that I turkey hunt with and deer hunt with, they're in the season you're in, and so you know it's always hey, let me see if I can get a pass.
Speaker 3:Let me cash my tokens. Yeah, let me see if.
Speaker 2:I've built up enough tokens to cash those in. But it's a different season where I do get to go more. You know, and um, and you know they can go kind of when they want to.
Speaker 1:You know, um, and they being the kids, kids, your boys, yeah um and so, um, it's just a different season.
Speaker 2:So I do get to hunt a good bit and I enjoy that and the thing that I've seen is every season's different but every season's got its own aspects that are special about it. So you know, when my boys were one, four and seven, that was a fun season. When they were, you know, five, eight and eleven.
Speaker 2:That was a real fun season you know, and now, as they're getting older, it's still. It's still good seasons, it's's just different. You know, before we started the podcast, we're renovating a house for my son and his fiance to move into when they're married, and so you just have all these different things that are happening. I think the thing that's challenging for a lot of people is what you said is giving up those things that you like because it's not about you anymore and having your first child exposes that more than anything else, because you realize it's not about you anymore and being able to say no to those things. And it's not that you have to just become a recluse and stay at home and never do anything, but the priority is now kids and family, making sure family's good, and all that.
Speaker 2:I remember when we had our oldest man, it was like I couldn't take a nap when I wanted to. I couldn't go hunting when I wanted to, I couldn't go fishing when I wanted to, I couldn't go play golf when I wanted to, and I was like whatever, or you do try to go do those things and it's an absolute dumpster fire. Yeah, absolute dumpster fire. Yeah, you know, it's just like absolutely like plant.
Speaker 3:Your plans are to go and do and enjoy, and it's you end up breaking the tip off your fishing rod or spending the whole time like just not doing what you want to do. But again, like you're saying, the focus isn't again on that season is not on you, right, um?
Speaker 2:and and you get. You know it's funny, cause a lot of times young people before they're married they think they're busy.
Speaker 3:And definitely. I mean really you don't have any perspective on anything else and I talked to.
Speaker 2:I talked to a lot of college students at the church and I'm like man, I'm so busy and I'm like and. I'm like man, I'm so busy and I'm like shut up, yeah, be quiet, you know, and I'm like I get it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I get it because I remember the stress of finals. I remember, you know, taking that last final, every, and we were on quarter system, but I remember taking that last final and not even care if I passed. It's like it's just over, you know, and like I remember that feeling of thinking I was busy but you weren't. And and um, when you have a kid and you're up two, three times a night and you know, unless your wife's breastfeeding or whatever, you're making bottles, and like y'all talked about not knowing when you change the last diaper, or you know, for me it was when I made the last bottle, like those are the things that. And I was at a restaurant the other day and there was a little girl screaming her head off and she's sweet, sweet as she could be, but she could tell she was worn out and I was like don't miss it yeah I just don't?
Speaker 2:you know, I I don't mean that bad, but I'm like, don't miss it and you get to this stage where you go from being just like dad to being advisor almost, and just more of a voice in their life, versus telling them or showing them what to do. You're more of an advice giver in a way, and I think that goes with a lot of transitions in life. You move from being the doer, the the one who tries to give wisdom to people you know so.
Speaker 2:But yeah, those seasons are are quick and they're changing and I remember getting two, three hours sleep at night and thinking I cannot do this for the rest of my life and I didn't realize it is a season, like you said.
Speaker 1:It's hard to feel it and see it when you're in the middle of it, when you're in the thick of it, you know so I was told this when I was younger, before kids came along, and it was or, as you know, as we're getting ready, preparing for Allie to be born, people would tell me it's going to go by fast.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Right, you know, don't get stressed about little stuff, don't get overwhelmed, because it's going to be over before you know it yeah. And I'm like these people are crazy. This is taking forever For the first five years, years, you know, for the first five years, or first, you know four years, or whatever. I'm like man, she came to a football. Yeah, you know. What do you mean? This is gonna blow by, you know. And then, and you know, I look back on it now and I'm like where? In the world did the time go?
Speaker 2:Yeah, and it's the seasons of life there's a season for everything. And it goes by. It does go by quick, but life goes by quick. And the Bible tells us that that life's like a vapor. It was here today and gone tomorrow. And you think about how many billions and billions or trillions of people have gone before us? And you know we're going to be the same way, um, and so it's. It's quick and unfortunately, I think we spend a lot of our time worried about things that don't really matter?
Speaker 3:Don't really matter at all.
Speaker 2:So many frivolous things rob our joy that they don't matter in the long run and I had a friend of mine tell me one time I thought it was great advice. He said if it's not going to matter in 30 to 60 days, don't worry about it. I thought it was pretty good advice. It was pretty sound, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3:Yeah, because the situation you're in today, like you're saying, if you think about it long-term, like does this really even going to matter or am I even? Going to remember this little thing. Yeah, that's really good. Yeah, I think the season like Tara and I are in is we're really trying to focus on nurturing and guiding our kids and giving and just putting them in environments where they scrape their knees or they're doing things and teaching them, but we're also really trying to focus on our relationship.
Speaker 3:I think one thing that is really hard when you're in a season like we're in, where we've got young kids, is you constantly focused on the kids, and it's the kids and this, the kids, that you all your schedule is completely around them, but then you forget, oh, I'm, I'm married to this person and, uh, you feel like you're on other sides of the world. But trying to maintain that and have date nights and and realize that we are in the thick of it, it is but just a blip on the radar and the longterm when you're looking at it, long term but, john, just like you were saying, like when you're in it, you're like man, this is like. This is seasons, the seasons forever, yeah, but they all feel like they all feel like that and then you blink your eyes and yeah, you're, you're past it.
Speaker 3:or you look back and you laugh and you're like, wow, that was, that was pretty funny.
Speaker 3:Pretty interesting time but, yeah, trying to be present in the moment, be excited about what's to come, but to also kind of use the time that you have or to make that time and to utilize that in a positive way. We had men's group last night and kind of reflected on that. We've been working through Acts and just Paul's. We're kind of on the tail end of Acts and really seeing Paul's ministry and I think one thing that we can kind of take from his ministry is just the selfless acts of knowing that God's got him, even though there's a couple of times where he's thrown in jail and on the verge of being killed. Last night we were in Acts 23, and there were 40 Jews that committed to not eating or drinking until Paul died.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 3:And we were talking last night like holy smokes. That's some serious activity.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's right. Yeah, we were talking last night like holy smokes, like that's some serious that's some.
Speaker 3:Yeah, that's right, yeah, yeah, we also went on the topic of like did they end up dying or starvation because?
Speaker 2:he didn't. He didn't die. I'm sneaking a snicker. Yeah, let's not eat. How committed are you around the corner?
Speaker 3:yeah you're not yourself when you're hungry. Um, either way, we were just talking through like, that of like I wonder they were mad. Yeah, I'd be bad too. Um, but just knowing, like paul, very easily, I mean he, he could, I mean for him in that season he was committed to god either way, but the selfless act of like letting god guide him, and he ends up getting through the night, having guarded soldiers take them to a Roman city, and just it's just cool to see like you can be in the thick of the thick, but God's going to have you if you're, if you're committed and you're, you're living a life for him and through him. So I don't know, it's kind of good.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you, you know we look at, we look at our, our child rearing days, we look at our families and you know you talked about you know you're you're kind of trying to do things to put your kids in situations where you know james might skin his knee or whatever. Madeline's not doing that yet not yet. I mean really really, you're still at the stage where you're having to do everything. Oh yeah, for them. Yeah, because they, they are incapable of doing anything for themselves.
Speaker 1:The bath time everything everything I mean it's all yeah james hadn't had a, hadn't had a mishap yet with his, with his potty training, with his, with his bathroom, with his new bathroom routine, you know, but it's coming oh, yeah, no because there's gonna be a. There's gonna be a time where you're not able to get him to the bathroom fast enough or what you know, what, whatever you know, something's gonna come up and and it's gonna slip your mind. It's not gonna happen to tara, it's gonna happen to jay oh, it'll happen to me for sure.
Speaker 3:I'm just gonna let you know how this is gonna go. I know, I already know, every time I'm with her she's like make sure he goes to the bathroom. Yeah, I'm like oh, I have like 30 other things I thought I needed to do. Right, bathroom was like on the back of the it's.
Speaker 1:Hey, it's natural, it's gonna come one way or the other. Buddy, whether you remember or not, it's gonna come you know, but, but so you're. You're at that place where you're doing everything. Right now, you and I are at the place where I heard somebody put it that that being a parent is like occupying another country, right?
Speaker 2:so you're, that's pretty much what my house feels like yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 1:Sometimes hostile, sometimes it's a hostile occupation, sometimes it's a friendly occupation, right? But but you, you've done things to to get that country to a place where it can support itself, right? So you start pulling back? Yes, right, and that's natural. That's what we should be doing. That's the whole. Goal is to help these little human beings become adult human beings that are productive yeah which means they can start doing what we've done for them, right? Yeah, now you're, you don't have the joy of having a daughter no, no that We've got three boys.
Speaker 2:It'd be, wow, it'd be different.
Speaker 1:Boys and girls are very different. I don't care what anybody says. This isn't a sports thing, I'm kidding. This isn't a sports thing. This isn't a political thing.
Speaker 2:We can make it work. It would be very easy. This isn't a political thing. We can make it work we can.
Speaker 1:It would be very easy. But boys and girls are very different. So when I'm going through and my wife and I we're working to lead our daughter, she looks to us for a lot. She wants to have our input. She wants her mom's input. Her best friend's her mom. I remind her her all the time I'm not her friend, yeah, but her best friend is her mom, you know I do that gently, yeah, yeah, just, I don't even like you now, yeah right now with my son.
Speaker 1:I remind him all the time I'm not his friend and I don't care if I hurt his feelings, right, and and the difference with him. So you've got this, you know, you've got this nation that you're occupying and your, your desire is to pull back and and to make a withdrawal and to do it, you know, in in a very strategic and ordered fashion. With boys, they start trying to take things earlier. Yeah, they're like nope, this part's mine get out.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'm claiming claiming yeah, I'm putting my flag right here you don't touch this anymore, dad, and they try to do it too soon. Girls don't do that. Yeah, in my, in my experience and I'm not just talking about with my daughter yeah, you know they'll. They'll test waters in other ways, but they don't do that, you know. And boys do, and I know that you can vouch for that because you've got three of them.
Speaker 2:I even you know it's funny because boys are like my dog remo, so every now and then he and I have whom he loves dearly, probably as much as my kids. But my kids cost me money. Remo makes me.
Speaker 3:That's right.
Speaker 2:But so every now and then we have to have this come to Jesus moment Right, when he starts stretching the boundaries a little bit. He doesn't want to necessarily come to me when I call, or he wants to, and he just gets a hard-headed streak of wanting to kind of do his things and have to reestablish like you don't call the shots Baseline, yeah.
Speaker 3:This is what we're doing. Just get back to this and you know, once we do that it's good.
Speaker 2:And I think boys are very similar in that, in that in that over time they're going to try to stretch and see how far they can get into you know their own world, which I think is natural and healthy.
Speaker 2:It's good, yes, it's good. I think where our job is is to set boundaries that they can grow in but also are safe within. I love what you said, jace, of being able to let James have room to skin his knee. You're not hovering over him so much that he can't go explore, learn, experience some adversity, make mistakes, but you're not going to let him go play on the yellow line in the road.
Speaker 2:No, absolutely not, you know and so there are boundaries that are healthy, that let them stake their flag in places that they should and then places where they shouldn't. You know, you still draw that line and say no, no, this is not. And you do it because you care about them, because you want them to develop into people who can run their own household their own family in a healthy way.
Speaker 1:And the way that you're going to see that right now you know you've got two kids that are not good at communicating because they're young. We have kids that are not good at communicating because they're stubborn and stupid. So the way you're going to see small kids rebel to something like that is it'll look like they are throwing a temper tantrum or something you know they'll. They'll throw a toy or they'll um, they'll start crying or something like that. It's because they don't know how to verbally communicate their emotions.
Speaker 3:They don't know how to express their emotions and we're we're seeing that with, with james, and, honestly, madeline started the other day of of yeah, the girls are going to start it sooner. If you leave her in a situation she doesn't want to be in, she's going to let you know. Yeah, but she's also a lot more vocal too. But no, James is he's in that two to three is a very emotional like not knowing how to control emotions, Like he's upset so he's going to throw something.
Speaker 2:Yeah, or take a swing at you, right, I mean like legit man I don't know that, but I'm just telling you, I, I remember, yeah, I remember my oldest, like I learned quickly that, like you know, spanking or something like that, which, if you don't believe in spanking, I don't care you're on, but you know it's, it's necessary a little like spanking him. It didn't matter.
Speaker 2:Yeah, like he was, he was just like you want to do that about me, bro, yeah, and and then like there were times where I would spank him and he'd swing at me and I'm like dude, like I know you're three, but hey, I'm kidding.
Speaker 1:But he would, I mean like he, and.
Speaker 2:But what I learned with him was if you took something away from him, oh my gosh, it was like you just ruined his whole world. And so having to learn how to discipline each one different and you know what gets their attention and what doesn't, and that kind of thing, I think it was part of the whole learning process and they were all different.
Speaker 1:Oh, for sure, yeah.
Speaker 2:It's interesting with my 22-year-old now. It's like I sort of wait and let him come to me.
Speaker 1:That's where you're at.
Speaker 2:That's the season you're in right now. He's a man. Yep season you're in right now. He's that he's. He's a man yep. Um, when he needs me, I'll let him come to me and I'll do whatever I can do to help um, my uh, 18 year old, who's about to move out. I'm a little more vocal. In his life there's still times where I'm like you better.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, get this straight, you know and see, and you don't know when that's going to change, yeah, like you didn't know when that was going to change for Dake. You know that's where you are now. Yeah, and and, and. You would have to really search back through and figure out okay, when did that transition happen, right, when did really? When did that season change to college? So he moved off for about a year and then came back to southern.
Speaker 2:That was when it changed a lot and we talked probably every single day while he was at school and there were a lot of questions and a lot of struggles and challenges he went through during that um with my middle son, jackson, like there's very few times that I have to be real firm with him. He's just a good-hearted natured kid that he wants to do right Now. My 14-year-old Reed if you've ever met him, you understand he's just hard-headed man. He's just, he's just hardheaded. And so he and I man like we won't come to blows but it's like he's a, he's another.
Speaker 2:I got two redheads and um, man like I'm like dude, I will not the red out of your hair.
Speaker 2:If you don't you know, and it's like, just because he's just, he's just wired that way, he's gonna, he's gonna try to argue with me. If I say it's foggy outside, he's gonna be like, nah, dad, that's just smoke. And I'll be like, no, that's fog. And then he's gonna be like, no, dad, that's smoke. I'm like you're a moron, you know you're wrong, yeah and so, but yeah it. But. But he's a lot of fun too, man, and and so they've all got their own personalities. But you know, he's so, he's fun and um, but just hard-headed. And he got that from his mom, of course, that's very sarcastic I was about to say you got that 100.
Speaker 2:Definitely not me yeah and so um, but yeah, it's just different, so yeah I love it.
Speaker 1:I mean, I really do. I love the hard parts. I love the fun parts. You know, obviously everybody loves the fun parts. I love the hard parts. I love looking back on things that I prayed for for my kids and then seeing that stuff, seeing the Lord answer prayers and listen. There have been numerous times where he's answered prayers in ways that I wasn't necessarily thinking he would, but I still I see it as an answer prayer because he, he, he still provided what I was hoping for, man, it was just way different than I thought it was going to be.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:And you know, the one thing as a parent to you can't expect is perfection, like we're not perfect, they're not going to be but helping them learn through the bad choices as well, and I think is super important, and um cause they're going to make them.
Speaker 1:And.
Speaker 2:I think they, I think we help them grow into the people that we want them to become, that the Lord wants them to become, by helping them understand their bad choices as much as them getting it right all the time and that's something that we've seen as our boys have gotten older is all right that wasn't a great choice. Let's learn from it and we're not gonna just harp on that as far as we're gonna deal with it and that's gonna be it and y'all keep talking, I'm gonna take him out real quick okay and uh.
Speaker 2:So yeah, that part's, um, that part's, you know, challenging, because it kind of hurts your heart when something doesn't go the way you feel like it should with them, but then having to regroup and go okay, what do we learn from this, you know, is super important so yeah, I think the hard part too is like you.
Speaker 3:You see the the train wreck about to happen yeah and you know the solution, but giving them enough grace and and distance to make that decision on their own, and then, like you're saying, kind of have a debrief afterwards like, hey, probably could have done it this way and it'd been a little better.
Speaker 2:Um, and certainly not letting them walk off a cliff, no, no, absolutely. But like you, the great example is go skin your knee go run on the asphalt and let them learn that when you do fall and skin your knee, I'm not going to be there to just say I told you so you can run to me not from me and I think that that's important that they know if I make a mistake I don't have to run from. Yeah, I can go to yeah, we uh, we uh.
Speaker 3:a 35 dollar slip and slide from walmart, uh, this weekend. So j, james and I, we were tasked. Tara had some stuff she was doing Saturday morning, so James and I went and got some stuff from the great establishment of Wally World. Oh boy, that was an adventure all in itself. But you have a two-and-a-half-year-old in Walmart. It's just grabbing and trying to get all the things.
Speaker 3:He's the most mature person there yeah, a thousand percent and well dressed. Oh my gosh. Either way, we walk in there with. The goal was to find some form of slip and slide, something that holds water. Yeah and uh, we walk around, we go to the outdoor section, we go, go to the actual outdoor gardening and where you would think some outdoor equipment would be. You ask someone that works there and they don't know where anything is either.
Speaker 3:So I ended up being in the seasonal and I get over there and it's like the last slip and slide. They got like one little kiddie pool and then like this, like slip and slide, with a pool and a slide and a shoot nozzle thingamajigger. And while we're walking around, james picks up like a wiffle ball bat and a ball because one of the dogs chewed up one. So we got him that. But we got him this slip and slide and, um, we get it all back to the house. We had made a pit stop and got some worm and worms and crickets too, because we wanted, we wanted to fish as well.
Speaker 3:So I was like, all right, james, what? What do you want to do? Well, and he's like, well, I think I and he's this is in James terms but he's like I was like you want to slip and slide, or you want to go catch some fish with worms and crickets? And he's like, oh, hmm, worms and crickets. I said, all right, well, you want to go fishing? And then he'd like change his mind. He's like he'd make his on worms and crickets.
Speaker 3:And then he I think he looked back at the, the little box with the slip and slide, and he's like no slip and slide. So we get a slip and slide. And it's funny, like when we first first busted out, like he's you can see him testing, testing the water, literally, yeah, um, and I mean by the end of the day, like he was like tiptoeing in it, trying to figure it out. By the end of the day he's's running circles and doing cannonballs, giving him like we were talking about the freedom, because there was a couple times he made some slips and it looked like it hurt and he'd come crying, but about five minutes later he'd be back at it and figuring it out. But it's just giving him that, not putting him on a leash, but letting him kind of come and go and figure it out and do all that stuff. So it's fun. It's a fun season for sure.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's good stuff. I've been reading a book. It's written by a Christian guy. It's not necessarily a Christian book, but the name of the book is called Strength to Strength Christian book. But the name of the book is called Strength to Strength and it's about transition from sort of your earlier years in life to how do you find success happiness that kind of thing in the second half of life, because I'm about to be 50 in October and I'm kind of sensing transition in my own life.
Speaker 2:And so one of the things he said was he, he had either two or three children. And he said he sat down and he wrote out the three most important things he wanted for his children and he said like to be honorable, or faith to be honorable. And then there was something else. And so then he said how much of my time am I allotting to invest in them so that these three things are actually true of them? And I thought that was like a really intentional, smart-wise, intentional, smart, wise, whatever way of being able to shape and mold your children into the people they should be and what God wants them to become. And I thought that was really interesting. And in that being able to mold them that way, and in that being able to mold them that way, the other thing and this is what I'm sensing in a transition that I'm in as I'm approaching 50 is, you know, all my life I've been what he would call a striver.
Speaker 2:You know, and I know you're that way, you're that way where you want to always build something.
Speaker 2:You want to always. You know you're always pushing where you want to always build something you want to always. You know you're always pushing for the next thing and there's a lot of research that shows most of what you do as far as achievement um actually comes from the work you do in your 20s and 30s. So sort of like the life work that you accomplish may happen in your 40s or 50s, but it's due to what you did in your 20s and 30s, because that's when you're gaining knowledge.
Speaker 2:And that's when you're gaining knowledge and that's when you're experiencing things and as you begin to shift from that. You know and he said, it happens as early as sometimes in your late 30s, but especially by the time you're in your early 50s um, there's a lot of research that supports that if you're going to be successful in the second half of your life, you have to make a shift from the striver doer and gaining knowledge. Not you ever quit learning that's not what he's saying but to a place of more, like a sage, you're the one who is pouring into other people who are where you?
Speaker 2:are people who are where you are and that that's an important transition to be able to make as you get older in life, because you begin to decline. I mean it just. It just is what it is and I don't want to admit that any more than anybody else. But I know that the drive I had when I was 25 is very different than the drive I have at 50. But I want to be able to spend. I don't think it's the second half of my life.
Speaker 1:I don't think I'm making it to 100.
Speaker 2:But I want to be able to spend these years making the best investment I can, and I do believe that that is going to be more investing in people than it is investing in what I'm putting my hands on as far as work, you know, and so I think that's an interesting transition that you're still quite a ways away, for sure. But as for you, and I like, and I know you're intentional with the, the guys who work here in the shop, like how do I pour wisdom into them? And being really intentional in making the transition of of that it's it's me building or me gaining knowledge, or me doing to now, how do I invest in other people so that they are able to do what God wants them?
Speaker 1:to do.
Speaker 2:And I just thought that was a. Really it was really helpful for me to help me understand where. I am you know, and the ability to even take a little pressure off of me from feeling like gosh I'm, I'm kind of suck at my, at what I'm doing in life, you know, and but realizing, okay, there's kind of a different purpose in my life now. Um, not necessarily to drive things as much as give wisdom on how to do things.
Speaker 3:Yeah, you're no longer in the driver's seat per se, you're in the passenger seat giving directions.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I'm a backseat driver, Exactly.
Speaker 1:No, no, let's put you in the front seat. I'd say at least let you be the navigator, slash DJ.
Speaker 3:That's right yeah.
Speaker 1:Because whoever's riding shotgun, your responsibility is to make sure you don't get lost and to play good music. Yep, if you can't do one of those things, get in the back seat.
Speaker 3:And you've got to be able to use the Google machine pretty effectively, because there's times where it's like all right, where's a good restaurant.
Speaker 2:It's like well crap, I got three seconds to put that together. There you go, you just type food, Food, yeah.
Speaker 3:Food near me. No, I think that's an awesome perspective. I'm not obviously in that season, but it's cool to hear you talk about that and hashtag goals. You know what I mean. That's something that we can just looking forward to that time. But I don't want to cut the time that I have right now short because, like you're saying, like right now the groundwork is being put in for the reward down the way.
Speaker 1:You know, and the reality is in your 20s and 30s, and I agree with what you're saying in your 20s and 30s, you're laying a lot of groundwork. You're laying a lot of groundwork. You're laying a lot of foundations. Listen, you might be doing something in your forties. It is completely, altogether different than what you were actually physically, tactically doing in your twenties and thirties. But that doesn't mean that what you went through in your twenties and thirties didn't help you get to where you are right now.
Speaker 2:It's not wasted, yeah. So running a business in my 20s did not. It has only helped me lead a church in my 30s, 40s and now almost 50s.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:You know, it certainly didn't take away. Oh, absolutely, it added value to being able to do that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you got to learn a lot of things that otherwise you were not going to learn. Yeah, you got to have those stressful days and stressful nights. There's times when you were like man, am I going to make payroll this?
Speaker 2:week.
Speaker 1:I got this big job coming up but I hadn't been paid for this last job. But I got to get these materials ordered. I got to figure out how I'm going to do this. I'm gonna have to hire somebody to go get that invoice paid. You know, yeah, yeah, I have to get off somebody. All right, easy, easy. It wasn't that long ago, easy, easy, yeah, I mean. But all all those things are, you know, build us to where we're, where we're going, and help us get to that point. You know the the sad thing that I've noticed, and I know that you guys have noticed this too.
Speaker 2:Wisdom and age don't always go together.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you know, and and you'll, you'll have this, this older guy. Just me saying that every one of us thought about this older guy, that we know that the wisdom hasn't followed.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you know, and you look at it and you're like man, you know what, what happened, where were, where was a, where was a decision made or a series of decisions made where that wisdom didn't come?
Speaker 1:You know, and sometimes it's easy to put your finger on it. Sometimes it's not that easy to put your finger on it because, um, you know it's, it's um, we could be really good about holding our cards really close to our chest and people not know what's really going on in your life. Um, sometimes you just get defeated by something and you never overcome it, for whatever reason. You know, you get hung up on that thing and it becomes an anchor in your life and you're anchored to something that happened 20 years ago, instead of having your anchor in heaven, where it's supposed to be. You know, like what we've talked about, jace you've said it several times this morning talking about milestones and these mile markers that we go through in life. And as we're talking about going through transitions and going through seasons seasons in parenting, seasons in marriage, seasons in our careers, hunting seasons that we get to go through there's all these markers along the way that help us become better if we will allow them to help us become better.
Speaker 1:The reality is it probably was a terrible situation. The things that help us grow the most probably were not comfortable. Yeah, something that we didn't enjoy, something that didn't turn out exactly like we wanted it to. Now it's easy to talk about that from a hunting perspective. I was Turkey hunting and this happened and man, I just didn't get that bird. And I'm disappointed, you know, but we don't, we won't really get hung up on that, that's right. But when something happens in life that doesn't go the way we wanted it to, we'll we'll let that, we'll get really hung up on that and we'll get chained to it?
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 1:You know, and and I think that's what will cause us to our age is going to continue to grow. If we're alive, we're going to get older. That's just the way it works. There's no way to stop that clock. I don't care what the commercial says about what's in that bottle that you can put on your face or that you can put in your body. It's not stopping the clock. That's right. Okay Now, I think it's good to be healthy. I think it's good to be healthy. I think it's good to do things to take care of your body, but you're still gonna age.
Speaker 2:Your drive's still different today than it was when you were 25. Just like you're talking about you can.
Speaker 3:You can nip it, tuck it, stuff it, whatever but, it's, it's still gonna suck I mean eventually yeah, that's right, that's so true yeah absolutely Very vivid.
Speaker 1:Yeah, but he shook it, he shook it.
Speaker 1:You got me on that one. You got me, I'll admit you got me. But how do we get to that point where we identify those things so, like in the book that you talked about, Strength to Strength, he gave very objective things to look at, right? How do we get to that spot where we look at things in a very objective way? You know, one of the ways to do that is to have people in your life that are going to be number one people in your life that you're going to be transparent with. I don't mean very transparent. You're either transparent or you are not. Okay, that's it. So who do you have in your life that you're willing to share things with that they're going to help you go through it? You've got to have that.
Speaker 1:And I'm not talking about a dozen people.
Speaker 2:I'm not talking about 30 people I'm talking about like one or two, and he even talks about that in the book. He's like you've got to have one, two, three people in your life that you can be that vulnerable, that vulnerable with that um. And he talks about the importance of relationships which I'm not a great relate like, I'm relationally just awkward in a lot of ways until I get to know somebody. But, like you, you have to have those people. There's just no way around it, like we're created for a community and you can't I can't become all that I'm supposed to be without people and people can't become all they're supposed to be without me. You know, it's like some people, you know, and so it's so true.
Speaker 3:And there's on the topic of transition, like those people that we're talking about being transparent with and best friends with and all those things those transition over time too, like those change with seasons and kids and before kids and then after kids and all the things. So being able to find your, your community, is super, super important. And uh, like I mentioned earlier with the small group, we've got on wednesday, like we've got kind of a mixed bag of of guys that are kind of in the season of uh not, or we got single guys, we got guys that are engaged and we got guys that are engaged and we got guys that are married and then we got guys that are married with kids. So we kind of got the whole spectrum. But being able to kind of pour into each other, even where you are individually, really allows having that transparency or just a time for us as guys to just talk through being in the crap, like I think for us.
Speaker 3:I know for me I like to stuff like, I like to stuff the stress or the whatever I've got. I like to stuff it and I don't really like to share it all the time. But having that, creating an environment to have that opportunity to share, is super important and it's just good to kind of work through that and, if you have, if we put ourselves on the island thinking, well, this is something that I'm just going through, whereas, like your brother in Christ across the table, he just went through that six months ago or five years ago.
Speaker 1:Or five years ago.
Speaker 3:And he knows the end result. But you don't see it because you're in the thick of it.
Speaker 1:Well, and the other three guys that are you know.
Speaker 3:I don't even know, that's a thing.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, the other three guys that haven't gotten there yet. They're watching. They're watching, Absolutely.
Speaker 3:So that was really cool. We had a couple moments like that last night, uh, in group and it that those creating those type of environments or or um experiences super, super important in this, in that season.
Speaker 2:So, yeah, um, speaking like I'm actually meeting with a, a friend of mine, who we've been through all kinds of things together over the last 25, 26 years, I'm actually meeting with him today, oh cool, and just to talk through some of the stuff that I've been reading and just to process and you know, what does this really look like? Like I understand the concept, but what does this look like? You know what is this? What does this really look like? Like I understand the concept, but what does this look like? You know to to do this, and I think you know that's important to be able to do.
Speaker 2:The other thing you were talking about, john, is people who we can think of, who just never entered into that place of of being the wise person who is able to give other people insight. I think some of that happens because we refuse to make the transition, so we don't want to go from striver to mentor, because we feel like we're losing something or we're afraid of what we'll lose. Um, he talks a lot about being afraid of losing respect, being afraid of losing position, being afraid of losing um sort of the spotlight yeah, I mean we never.
Speaker 1:We don't want people messing with our cheese. You know, yeah, yeah, yes, who stole my? Who stole? Yeah, you know that book?
Speaker 2:I remember reading that years ago and it's that whole thing is. You know, if we're not willing to make that transition, it is going to affect our joy, you know, and our purpose. So, even more important.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think it's. It's another one of those things where you don't know when it's going to happen. You don't know when it's. You know, you don't know when, when you're, when you're going to transition from being the the you know the primary driver to supporting the group of primary drivers.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, um so, and and I I think it's I don't know, I think it's just something that we should talk through, that we should acknowledge that. Hey, this is a thing you know, how do we, how do we position ourselves to be in this place, where we're, you know, not just hoping for growth, but we're expecting it to happen. And I think being in a church is so important because outside of that community, I think it's just so easy to just be floundering in the world.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you just go through the motions for 75 years.
Speaker 3:The world's just going to toss you around like a ragdoll too. I mean, there's no moral compass, there's no true north, so you're just going to be pulled in all the different directions. When y'all were just talking, thinking about transitions, it really made me think about the disciples. Think about the disciples. You had guys that were fishing and had Jesus come and say follow me and drop what they were doing. Well, that morning they were fishermen. Well, after that they dropped what they were doing and they had a period of time there with Jesus. So they were in the transition of from fishermen to now I'm, I'm being discipled, I'm learning from the creator. Then you have we just had easter, you have the death and the resurrection, and and now you have guys that over three year period they were, they were learning and they were being poured into. Well, now jesus has died and is the right hand of God. Now the Holy Spirit's come down and the deployment of hey, go to make disciples of all nations. So they went from fishermen to a season of learning and discipleship. And now, go make disciples of all nations, go grow the church, go make disciples of all nations, go grow the church. And you look at that as a seasonality of they didn't know what that was going to look like if you asked them.
Speaker 3:So I think we can look at the Bible and how godly men took that transition and how they adjusted. Did they make mistakes? Absolutely, they're human. And did they miss a? Did they make mistakes? Absolutely, they're human. And where did they miss? A lot of the things. And we have a great perspective because we can see it from a 30,000 foot view. But I think there's times where we kick ourselves for not being able to see the big picture. But it's, it's okay.
Speaker 1:I think in the end.
Speaker 3:I think as long as we keep the main thing, the main thing and we we focus on Christ and know that he is lighting the path before us. We're going to have seasons of doubt or seasons of this and that, but I think if we can look at examples, it gives us excitement for what is to come and I think understanding too.
Speaker 2:Circumstances can change in a moment, transitions happen over time. So the circumstances for the disciples when they were called to become fishers of men and follow Jesus, the circumstance changed immediately, but the transition from fishermen to you know, fishers of men was something that took them three years to really begin to even grasp a little bit of.
Speaker 3:And even then, even until the end, I mean, they still had no idea. Jesus is telling them hey, I'm going to die. And no, no no, no, no, Everything's good yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, they just couldn't get it Right. So you've got that verse in John where it says Jesus wept right and he's there to see Martha and Mary and what's going on with Lazarus. Lazarus died and he's been dead for four days and in the tomb and he wept in that moment because all right. So they sent word to him and he delayed going.
Speaker 1:He didn't go when they sent word saying he was sick, you know, and he did that to help his disciples believe, and a lot of others, a lot of other people that were there he did it to. He did it to put the, the, the wheels in motion to, you know, lead to his crucifixion, um, because that that gave some pretty um, um, some pretty firm footing to the, to the Sanhedrin that wanted torin, that wanted to take him out. But he wept because, you know, just in my mind's eye, I picture him looking at his disciples and realizing that they don't get it, at his disciples and realizing that they don't get it. Everything I've said to them about that. I came into this world to pay the price. You know they don't get it.
Speaker 1:They still think I'm here to overthrow Rome you know, and I truly believe that's why he cried, that's why he wept, was because he was overwhelmed with the fact that he was trying to help them understand and their human flesh stayed in the way.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and I think that's the nature of any transition as well. Is we never see?
Speaker 1:everything that's happening.
Speaker 2:So that's where I think, faith has to come in is I'm going to trust in the midst of not fully understanding. The meantime is the most difficult time.
Speaker 1:And the benefit is it's not a blind faith, it's not just some whimsical hope that we have Right. So I read a story this week in Daniel so Nebuchadnezzar. Um has these dreams and he's become an insomniac. He can't sleep anymore because his dreams have taken his sleep. And so he calls all of his Chaldeans and magicians and all these people before him and says you know, I want you to tell me what in the world is my phone doing? I'm sorry. I want you to tell me my dream, and then I want you to interpret my dream for me. Well, they couldn't do it.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:You know, and I think I don't know if I don't know, you know the, the dynamic, I don't know the, the, the, the relationship or the situation he had with them or whatever, but I don't think he fully trusted them.
Speaker 1:I think, he thought they were full of crap, right Duh, yeah, they were, and you know. So they go back to him and say listen, there's nobody that can do this, only the gods know little g. Gods know the dreams of men, and gods don't live in men. Gods are not flesh. And then Daniel gets an audience with the king and says hey, if you'll give me until tomorrow, I'll tell you what this dream is and Nebuchadnezzar's. Like You're just stalling, you're not going to be able to do this.
Speaker 1:They'd already started killing these guys Before Daniel gets Before him, and then he reaches out his golden scepter and boops Daniel and says Okay, I'll see you tomorrow, bro. That's my version of how it went.
Speaker 2:You don't find that in the text. That's the John King. You booped people.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you booped people with the scepter. That's a blessing Boop right. And then Daniel goes and gets his.
Speaker 2:Some I'm praying for, some I'm just going to like You're so weird.
Speaker 1:Anyway, one of us is weird, we're all, we're all weird. Um, anyway, daniel goes and gets his closest friends and says we have to pray and and god will provide, god will show us right, and the lord provided his faith was God's going to do this, he's going to provide this for us. And then he goes and meets with Nebuchadnezzar the next day. All right, hold on Before that and this is in Daniel 2, you can go and read it. So he goes, they get together and they pray. So they get together and they pray. And then the next morning Daniel gets up and he knows what the dream is. He knows the interpretation of the dream. He may have dreamed the exact same dream. I don't know how the Lord gave it to him. The first thing Daniel does is praise God. That's the first thing Daniel does is praise God. That's the first thing he does. So I tell that story to say and then he goes and tells Nebuchadnezzar what the dream is and tells him the dream, and then he interprets the dream and none of it is good. None of what he's getting ready to tell the king is good. Now we're done with that part of the story.
Speaker 1:Now let's look at how we apply it to our lives today. How often or how good are we at having true faith that God's going to answer our prayer, right? And then, when he does, how good are we at immediately praising him for it? He does, how good are we at immediately praising him for it? Yeah, you know, I mean to me.
Speaker 1:To me, wisdom doesn't come apart from that, you know. It just doesn't If wisdom, all right. So if we, if we go through life and we think everything that we've done is is due to our effort and and as results of what we have put in and it's all us you're gaining no wisdom through that, I'm just, I hate to break it to you, but we're not going to gain any wisdom from that, right, you know, because we think we got this, yeah, so if you think you got it all the time, how in the world are you going to grow? You think you have no room for growth, Right? So my base question there is how do we put feet to our faith and our belief and our hope and say we can, we can trust god. You know to do this, and I'm not saying mama's sick, okay, I'm gonna pray and god's gonna heal her. That is not what I'm saying, that's not what. This is okay, but how do I have faith in god and do so in a tangible, real way?
Speaker 2:I think some of it comes from life experience, like God's proven himself faithful over time.
Speaker 1:And listen. If you're not keeping a record of that, if you're not keeping up with it I mean, I don't know about you, but I forget stuff really easily, right and if I don't keep a record of what's going on, what he's doing? I'll give you an example, without sharing any names or any details A couple years ago had just a terrible situation with a person and it just wasn't good. You know there was no part of it that was good, everything that surrounded it, and you know there was some anger on my part. You know I was pretty upset about how some things had shaken out, and I was. You know I had the opportunity to get hung up on that, right, and I remember distinctly praying God, I need you to release me of this, I need to put this behind me. And it wasn't a situation where it was something that I was going to get hung up on because of there being lasting ramifications from it or anything like that. It was just like a hurt I guess would be the best way to put it Like this person hurt me, I want to hurt them, right?
Speaker 1:I mean that's kind of like our natural tendency. I mean truly the flesh. That's the flesh's natural tendency. Somebody hurts me, I'm going to hurt them. I don't know what it's going to look like. I don't know how I'm going to do it.
Speaker 1:I don't know if I'm going to physically hurt them or if I'm going to verbally abuse them or gossip about them or whatever.
Speaker 1:Do their Tesla, yeah, I mean all these different ways that that can manifest itself, right? I distinctly remember praying God. I want to forgive because I don't want to be hung up on this and I want the best for this person. I don't wish ill against them Because if I did, then I'm still tied to that. I'm still kind of watching okay, the other foot's going to drop, I'm going to sit here and watch this. That's not a good place to that. I'm still kind of watching Okay, the other foot's going to drop, I'm going to sit here and watch this. That's not a good place to be. You know and listen, I'm not coming at this saying, boy, look at how good I am, because I'm not Okay. Don't, don't misunderstand me. I'm not saying I'm good and I'm wonderful and I did everything the right way. That's not who I am. I am a sinner. I fall short every single day. I have to repent of something every day. Every day, I catch myself in something and I have to repent of it. Yeah, all right. So fast forward. You know, two years.
Speaker 1:I get a phone call from somebody and, um, this guy, I know him, but I I don't, I don't know him really well, you. He calls me. He says, hey, john. I said hey, man, how you doing? He said you got a minute? I said, yeah, sure, what's going on? He said I needed to call you and apologize to you. I said, okay, what happened? What are you apologizing for? He said I cast judgment on you that I shouldn't have. I said okay. I said you know. He explained the situation.
Speaker 1:Things were said and he believed the things that were said, even though we knew each other well enough for him to know. You know, yeah, that wasn't who I was. And he said I cast judgment on you. He said I said things about you I should have never said, and I just want to apologize to you for that. And I'm like. I said, man, listen. I said I accept your apology, I forgive you.
Speaker 1:I don't know what was said, what was done. I appreciate you reaching out to me and everything and um, and that was part of what I asked god to release me of because I knew, because I knew the character of the person, I knew that there was going to be a lot of squawking, right, yep, I knew that there was going to be things said that probably were not true, because when you do something wrong, you paint a picture of how you didn't do anything wrong. You know, because two years ago I said, god, I trust you to handle this. I'm not thinking about this anymore. But I can't do this unless you move in and help me, because me and my flesh. I'm going to think about it, I'm going to dwell on it. It's going to be a thought that I have. I'm going to be curious about it and I'm telling you I never even thought about it anymore.
Speaker 1:You know, outside of I'd pray for the individual a little bit because I truly do want the best for him. I truly do want the best for him and I would pray for him every now and then, but that was it. And then to get that phone call, I'm like you know, I get off the phone and I pull my journal out and I just write a praise to God, thanking him for not thanking him for, you know, any deterioration that's happened between those two individuals, because that's not my prayer, I don't want that to happen, but thanking him for going ahead of me and protecting me, even though it was two years later. Later, you know, he pointed out that. You know he, he moved in this person's life enough to the point where this guy calls and is like man. I was wrong, you know, and that's not natural.
Speaker 2:I was going to say that's that's not natural.
Speaker 1:I praise the Lord for the work that he's doing in his life, not only for the protection that he gave to me answering my prayer from two years ago, but for the work that he's doing in this individual's life, because that was not a natural thing for him to do, right? So, and I say all that and I'll go back to say you know, I'm not perfect, I don't do things in a perfect way. None of us do. But how do we get to that place where?
Speaker 1:we're going to become intentional about saying my hope is in something that's real and alive, my faith is in truth, and then put our feet to it. It is critically important that we do that. Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 2:If that's not where our hope is, then we have none.
Speaker 1:Right. I mean, if we do, it's fake, it's superficial, it's certainly not something we would die for. No, yeah, yeah, but anyway that's good stuff. Yeah, we'll kill it there. Hope you guys enjoyed. We got off cadence a little bit this week, but it's okay. This will post today so and we'll get back on track for next week. So appreciate everybody.
