47 | Feeling Out of Control? 3 Questions to Know if Your Overwhelm Is About Control — Not Your To-Do List

Are you an overwhelmed mom who feels like no matter how much you do, it’s never enough? You’ve bought the planners, tried the routines, and told yourself if you just managed your time better, you’d finally feel calm. But here you are — still stressed, still snapping at your kids, still scrolling late at night just to quiet your mind.

In this episode, we’re talking about why your overwhelm might not be about your to-do list at all — and three simple questions to help you see if what you’re really chasing is control.

If you’ve been wondering “how to stop feeling stressed as a mom,” “why do I keep yelling at my kids,” or “how to calm my mind” — this conversation will meet you right where you are. You’ll learn why time management tips and organization hacks can only take you so far, and how to start making choices that actually bring peace, balance, and confidence back into your day.

Because mama, your worth isn’t in how perfectly you manage it all. It’s in who you are — and the courage it takes to live differently.

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🎶 Instrumental Acoustic Guitar Music by Viacheslav Starostin (original_soundtrack),

W E B S I T E - LisaCovert.com

I N S T A G R A M - @lisamcovert

Transcript

Your Host Lisa Covert: 0:00

Thriving doesn't mean a spotless house, the kids who never argue, or a to-do list with every single thing checked off. Thriving is messy. My house is still messy. My family still argues. You just heard a clip from today's episode of the Overwhelmed to Empowered podcast. In this one, we're digging into what's really behind that constant out-of-control feeling. Is it your schedule? Is it your to-do list? Or is it really about control itself. Today, I'm giving you three questions that will help you see the difference and start shifting from panic to peace. Welcome to episode 47. Hey, I am Lisa Covert. Welcome to the Overwhelmed to Empowered podcast, where we stop pretending we are fine and start leading lives we are proud of. No more to-do lists, no more burnout, just real talk, real tools, and the reset your heart has been asking for. Let's talk about it. Let me just paint the picture. Your alarm goes off and before your feet even hit the floor, you're already mentally running through the list. Lunches to pack, emails to answer, kids to get out the door, maybe the meeting tonight or today, or groceries that need to be grabbed. The whole day feels like a race before you've even brushed your teeth. And you keep running and running all day, from one thing to the next. Drop off, kids! Maybe work or errands. Back to pick up the kids. Practices, dinners, meetings, emails, errands. Somewhere in there you've snapped at your kids. Maybe you're your partner too. Not because you don't love them. You love them more than anything. But because you're stretched so thin. And when the house finally gets quiet, when the people you've been running for all day are finally settled, You're left staring at the TV remote or scrolling on your phone or reaching for a snack or whatever you're currently reaching for to numb, to find a little peace from your thoughts, those emotions and doing. Because numbing feels like the only way to turn your brain off for a second. But here's the thing. That's not living. That's surviving. And surviving might keep you afloat, but it's not the life you want. And it's not the life you were made for. If you're nodding your head right now, I want you to hear me. You're not thriving. You're surviving. Here's the lie that most of us keep falling for. If I could just get more organized, then I'd finally feel calm. If I could just get some of those things done, those projects, I'd feel more calm. How many times have you bought the new planner? The one that promised to fix your life. And two weeks later, it's collecting dust on the counter. Or maybe you downloaded that latest app that swore it would help you stay focused. only to forget your password in the next week. We keep thinking the problem is the system. So we search for a new one, hoping this time it will stick. What is everybody doing? Tell me so I can do it too. But it's not the planner. It's not the app. It's the belief underneath that if we just hustle harder, do more, organize better, then we'll be worthy. And let's be honest, Worthy to who? I used to say it to my husband all the time. Well, what are they going to say? And he'd look at me and say, who's they? And I'd get annoyed because honestly, I didn't know. But isn't that the truth? Who are the they we're trying to impress? There's no award for perfect. There's no gold medal for having every room spotless and every kid perfectly dressed with matching socks. Even if there was, what is perfect anyway? A robot? You're not a robot. You're a human being. But as long as you keep believing that perfection and unrealistic expectations are what make you valuable, you'll stay stuck chasing the next system, the next fix, and never actually feel the peace you're desperate for. What you need is to own your choices. And And I don't just mean like the big ones, like moving a house or changing jobs. I mean the everyday decisions that make your life feel either heavy or light. Here's the difference. Survival is being dragged by your to-do list, your guilt, and everyone else's expectations. Thriving is saying, this is what I choose. This is what works for me. And I'm okay with that. For me, one of the places this finally clicked was something as simple as groceries. I used to bounce between stores, chasing the deals here and the fresh produce there, and listening to what everyone else swore was the best place and had the best. And it felt chaotic. I never knew if I was doing it all right. It always felt like I spent so much money and I didn't have anything to make a meal or anything to send lunches. Then one One day I decided, I'm going to Costco every week and I'm going to Fresh Thyme for my veggies, period. That's my system. That's my choice. And because I owned it, everything got lighter. I wasn't wasting mental energy second guessing myself or chasing someone else's opinion. And here's the funny thing. Once I owned that choice, new options just opened up. I learned about special executive hours at Costco. I can go there at 9am before everyone else and just shop without it busy. It's like no one's there. And I even found ways to either Instacart or pick up the groceries if I'm really busy, if that's what I wanted to that week. And I even spend so much less money. None of that happened until I stopped trying to find the perfect way and just decided. By making that decision, I was able to evaluate and see if that worked for me. That's the power of owning your choices. It doesn't have to be perfect. It doesn't have to impress everyone. It actually doesn't have to impress anyone. It just has to work for you. Because when you own your choices, you stop living on autopilot. You stop surviving and you start moving steadily into a life that feels calmer, lighter, and more yours. Can I share something real for a second? It's not easy to say, but I think someone listening right now needs to hear it. There was a time in my life, honestly, more than once, where I was so burnt out. I couldn't even be around my own family. I remember lying in bed, so drained, so overwhelmed, that even my kids felt like one more thing on my plate. and it broke my heart because I love them deeply but I was completely empty I was stuck in survival mode numbing my way through the days and somewhere along the way I started disappearing from my own life and then life reminded me how short all of this really is I lost a dear friend whether that loss was through heaven or simply distance it changed me and I saw so clearly how easy it is to pour everything into everyone else and leave nothing for yourself. But your story, it doesn't have to go that way. You are meant to show up for your people with joy, peace, calm, and energy. But more importantly, you're meant to show up for you. That's exactly why I created the Empower Living six-week course. It's the reset I wish I had sooner, a simple step-by-step way to move out of overwhelm out of burnout and back into your life with intention. If it's hitting your heart, I want to invite you to take that first step. Your peace, your purpose, and your story matters. Head to lisacoverett.com slash empowered living because you deserve to be present for your life and only you get to write how your story unfolds. So here's where I want you to pause with me for a moment. Ask yourself, what do I no longer need in my life? Not what do you want someday. Not what would be nice if it magically appeared. I mean right now. What is weighing you down that you could start laying down? Maybe you can lay down the letting your to-do list decide whether you're a good mom. Maybe it's laying down perfection. The pressure for your house to look like an Instagram reel. Maybe it's comparing yourself to the perfect mom on social media who, by the way, probably spends hours filming that video just to make it look effortless. Maybe it's trying to please everyone, saying yes when your whole body is screaming no. These are heavy, and you don't have to carry them anymore. I didn't realize how much the weight of survival was even showing up in my body. Years ago, I wore the same necklace every day, and it started to feel tighter and tighter. At the time, I didn't think much about it at all. I just clasped it, like, made it so it was at the last ring. But looking back, I can see it was my body trying to tell me something. The stress, the racing to-do list, the cortisol overload. My body was literally tightening around my throat. Why did I need a blood test to tell me that the cortisol was getting stuck in my thyroid? Now I have that same necklace. I can literally put two hands in it. Because here's the truth. When we ignore what's heavy, it doesn't just affect our schedule. It affects our health. It all affects our joy. and the people we love most. We are not present. So take this question seriously. What do you no longer need? You don't have to have the perfect answer. Just start naming it. Because once you name what's heavy, you can start laying it down. And that's when space opens up for lighter, calmer, the more empowered version of you. Now I want you to imagine what thriving could look like for you. Thriving doesn't mean mean a spotless house, the kids who never argue, or a to-do list with every single thing checked off. Thriving is messy. My house is still messy. My family still argues. But here's the difference. My worth isn't riding on it anymore. When my kids come home from school, I don't measure myself by whether they're in a good mood or not. If I get an email about something they forgot, or even that one time somebody ate in a Yep, that's a true story. the day starts. I choose gratitude even when life is loud and imperfect. I can step out of an argument with my husband and instead of stewing and thinking all the things how it's unfair, I catch myself thinking, I'm so grateful I even have him to argue with. I look at my kids. They're my circus. They're my monkeys. And even in this chaos, I'm grateful they're mine. That's the It's not about everything being perfect. It's about you being present and calm and proud of how you show up, even while life is still messy. Before we wrap up, I just want to say thank you. Thank you for showing up for you. And thank you for showing up here for listening to me and letting me be just some part of your day. It really does matter that you're here because I know you could be numbing out, scrolling or doing a thousand other things, pulling But instead, you pressed play. And that tells me you're ready for something different. And because of that, I want to let you in on something I'm working on. I'm building a boot camp. It's going to be just a couple days long, short but powerful, where I walk you through these shifts in real lifetime. Think of it like a reset button for the overwhelmed mom who's tired of just surviving. Now here's the deal. The first round is special. I'm running it live. It's going to be free. And yes, I said free. And it's kind of my way of saying thank you for being here early and for walking this out with me. Later on, it'll be recorded and I'll offer it as a paid course. But this live group gets me in real time. The only way to know when it launches is to be on the email list. And don't worry, I'm not going to blow up your email. I send about one note a week if I'm lucky. And when the bootcamp is ready you'll get an invite. So here's what to do. Go to lisacoverte.com slash bootcamp and pop in your name on the waiting list. That way you'll be the first to know when the free round opens up. And while you're there, grab the five triggers freebie. It's a quick way to start spotting the exact patterns that are keeping you stuck in survival mode. I hope you have a great day and I'll see you in the next episode.

My Son : 15:20

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Your Host Lisa Covert: 15:30

If this episode made you pause, reflect, or even breathe a little deeper, would you do me a favor? Take 30 seconds and leave a quick review for the show. It helps more women who are stuck in the same overwhelm we've talked about today actually find this podcast. I'm not here for everyone, but I am here for the woman who's tired of holding it all together and ready to live a life that finally feels like her own. And hey, if you're feeling brave, take a screenshot of your comment and email it to me at lisa at lisacover.com. Every month I do a little giveaway drawing for listeners who share or review the show. You never know, you might get something special. Thanks for listening. Thanks for being here. And most of all, thanks for choosing to keep showing up for you. you