From Ridicule to Resilience: My Journey with Physical Disability

Physical disabilities can be debilitating especially in a Country like Nigeria! 

Brother K shares the continuation of his life story as a physically challenged man, recounting his journey from childhood bullying to self-acceptance and personal growth despite living with polio.<br><br>• Enduring years of mockery and bullying from neighborhood children who would sing behind him and push him while walking to school<br>• Standing up to his tormentors by fighting back against a boy who pushed him, using his polio-affected leg in a way that shocked everyone<br>• Learning independence through his parents' tough approach, which required him to do all household chores despite his disability<br>• Searching desperately for healing at numerous religious crusades and prayer meetings<br>• Attending Reinhard Bonke's massive crusade in Lagos, walking miles with his wooden crutches only to leave disappointed<br>• Making the life-changing decision to accept himself and stop chasing miracles<br>• Discovering his talents and strengths while learning to cope with his situation<br>• Finding that hope is essential but must be directed toward realistic goals<br><br>Hope is the currency we spend for tomorrow, and any man that has hope has a future. The matter does not matter until it begins to matter.<br><br>

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Transcript

Childhood Mockery and Bullying

Speaker 1 0:00

Turn it up . I told you nah-ah , ah , please . No , you are worse than me . I know that you're a handy shaker , but they want to help me . Welcome to another episode of the Butterbox Podcast . And of course you know they call me Brother K .

Speaker 1 0:21

Last week I started a series into my life as a physically challenged man , and so today it's the continuation of that story , and I'm going to try to recall where I stopped , and I think that is when I talked about how the kids in my area was singing behind me , mocking me as I was making my way to school every morning , which was a very challenging time for me . It was crazy , it was depressing , demoralizing , but it continued for years , for years , and one day I made up my mind that , out of all these kids that sing mocking me , I'm going to deal with one , and which and not this is what they do , for every time they sing mocking me , some of them will be shoving me at the back , some would even push me . I will fall over , stand up , pick up my bag , continue . Sometimes before I get to school , I'm looking all dirty because they've pushed me multiple times , I've fallen and when I get up , I look dirty , but I still have to go . So one day I was mad , I was furious , and so a boy showed me from behind and as I turned , before , as I was falling , I grabbed him , his shirt , pulled him with me on the floor and that right leg , that my right leg , which is the reason they mocked me for I twisted it around his neck , I held him down . He was was screaming . All the other kids were screaming . They were shocked . They never knew I could do that , but of course , because of the way my leg , or that right leg is , because of the polio , you know , there were some things I could do with the leg which every normal kid could not do , meaning that I could move it around anywhere and I wouldn't feel any pain . So I wrapped it around his neck and they were screaming . In fact , they had to run to go get his mom , and when his mom came , they saw us on the floor . They were shouting leave him . Leave him feel it . Feel it , of course , but I didn't .

Speaker 1 2:40

I was determined to make sure that he feels every pain that I felt for all those years that they would mock me behind , singing , humiliating me . And when the mother noticed that I wasn't giving up and I wasn't going to let her son go . She pounced on me . She was hitting me a kid , a 10-year-old kid . She was hitting me left , right and center . And the moment I noticed that she was hitting me left , right and center , and the moment I noticed that she was hitting me because she felt that by hitting me I would let her son go , I made up my mind that you are going to have to kill me before I leave this boy and I held on tight to him .

Speaker 1 3:18

Now , by the time they realized that I wasn't letting him go , I think somebody suggested that they should go get my mom . So they ran to my compound , called my mom . My mom asked what is going on . They were just pointing at the direction where the whole incident was happening and my mom ran there . My mom got there , saw what was going on . He shouted my name , kingsley , leave him , let him go now . At that point I raised raised my head and saw that it was my mom , and as much as I didn't want to let him go , but my mom had screamed my name , telling me to let him go . So I let him go and somehow letting him go .

Speaker 1 4:01

All those kids that day were frightened . So that was how I got them to stop singing behind me and mocking me every morning when going to school . And so the next day , while I was going to school , I was expecting that they were going to do the same thing . But as I was walking to school , nobody came out . Nobody stand behind me , nobody was behind me mocking me and for the first time in my life , in a long while , there was this peace , there was this calm , so the life could be this free

Standing Up Against Tormentors

Speaker 1 4:37

. And I got to school . And years passed , I got into secondary school . You know now , this is the thing .

Speaker 1 4:50

While I was growing up , a whole lot was happening . My parents never treated me like a physically challenging boy , because they knew that life wasn't going to be easy on me . So they made me do everything every normal kid would do . I would wash the plates , do the dishes , sweep the house , wash clothes , go fetch water . Now you would imagine how the boy with the bad leg would do all these things . Trust me , I was doing every one of them . And while I was doing these things , I felt my parents were being wicked to me . I felt they were being heartless . I mean , who would see me in this condition and give me all these things to do , all these house chores to do . But they made me do it , in fact , because I have three younger sisters . They never allowed them to do anything Not that they don't allow them to do anything , but they allowed me to do most of the job , and I was the eldest . And so several years later I realized that what they did paid off , because today I do practically anything on my own without having to depend on anybody , and that was because of how my parents trained me . Now so .

Speaker 1 6:02

But then , getting into secondary school , started going to church , started reading my bible , and I started hearing that god can heal me if I believe , if I have faith . You know I was attending deeper life by then . So every program that was held in deeperer Life that Pastor WF Comey was preaching , you would find me there . Any miracle center or any place there's a crusade , that miracle crusade . You will find me there . Because I was looking for miracles , because I was growing older . You know , I saw my friends have girlfriends , but I could not , because you know which girl is going to like me or love me the way I am . You know , that was just my thought .

Speaker 1 6:52

Anyway , I was looking for miracles , trusting that I was going to get healed and I would walk normal and somehow I would go to all these crusades , all these miracle nights , and I'm seeing other people get healed while I'm not healed . A leg remains the same . In fact . You will hear somebody just shout Papa , somebody here was blind for several years and he can see . And they will shout Hallelujah , he can see . And they will shout hallelujah , he can see , he can see . Name it every crusade . I was everywhere at that time . I was there . If bishop waloki was having a crusade , I was there . If rehan bonki was having a crusade , I was there . Name all the crusades . I was going around looking for miracle because I needed my leg to be healed .

Speaker 1 7:41

And so sometime in 1996 or 1997 , I was listening to the radio and I heard an announcement that Evangelist Rehab Bonki was coming to Nigeria for his mega crusade . Now , rehab Bonki was a very , very notable evangelist that was preaching all over the world , holding big crusades and healing people , and he was usually you know , every year he would visit a particular African country , and that year in particular , he came to Lagos . And so I made up my mind and I said to myself this is it . Finally , I'm going to get my miracle . Because I've watched his miracle crusades on TV and see , and I saw the kind of healings that happened in his crusades . So I said to myself , if he can do this , and because of course he was a white man he's late now , though God bless his soul I said if he was a white man , since he's a white man , he would be able to heal me . And so that day we heard that he was going to be coming to the Olympic ground . Don't mind the coffee you're hearing at the background , that's my wife's coffee . Yeah , I'm married now . So , um , it continued and I heard it was coming to the olympic ground .

Speaker 1 9:08

If you live in lagos , there's a place called sonia bus stop . Uh , before agor palace became developed as it is today , um , that area was linked to sonia bus stop . It was an empty large expanse of land . It used to be called the olympic ground and that was where rehat bonke held his crusade in 1996 or 1997 . And so I was living in satellite town . Then I blew a shunt , to be precise , because then when we meet girls , if we want to tell them where we live , we say we live in satellite town so it doesn't sound too . No , satellite town sounds posh .

Parents' Tough Love Approach

Speaker 1 9:46

You see that you say you live in satellite town or you say you live in fest town , but where we're living was just a place very close to satellite town . It was called a bl .

Speaker 1 9:54

So I walked all the way from Aboloshun down to Sonia Bus Stop that evening to Rehat Bonki Crusade . The crowd was massive . You know , just imagine that kind of experience . You know the experience the gospel concert that holds every year in December Times . Three of that crowd was the crowd that came for the rehab donkey crusade that year , and so there was massive crowd and when I got there the whole place was jam-packed , open airfield . I could not even see where the podium or where the stage was . From where I was standing far back Just imagine , like I'm standing at Onikon and the stage is somewhere around the Atlantic and I still couldn't see the stage . But I could hear the sound of the pastor as the evangelist preaching and somehow I was forcing my way in between that crowd . I told myself if I could get to that crowd or in front of the stage I would get my miracle and somehow I got very close to the stage and evangelist Reha Bonki started preaching and started praying .

Speaker 1 11:14

Finally , it was time for miracle and everybody was praying fervently . I also was praying fervently because why was I here ? Why was I there ? I came for my miracle . I was going to get my miracle . Nothing was going to stop me from getting my miracle . And just as he was praying , every other person around me was shouting that they have been healed , they can see the lane can walk , the dead is rising , people , disabled people could walk again . Everybody was getting healed , but except me . Why ? Why am I not getting healed ? What's going on ? What's happening ? This is the reason why I came . How come every other person is getting healed ? What's going on ? What's happening ? This is the reason why I came . How come every other person is getting healed , but I wasn't getting healed and I waited , I prayed fervently and eventually the crusade ended for that night and it was time for everybody to leave the venue .

Speaker 1 12:16

Now , as we're trying to make our way out of the venue , disappointed as I was , heartbroken as I was living without being able to receive my miracle , there was a heavy stampede , heavy stampede . People were pushing themselves and the ushers , the stewards , were trying to , you know , direct everybody to go towards a certain direction , but somehow the place was dark , the whole place was dark , and because the crowd was massive , a group of us fell into a big ditch . You know , when you fall into a very , very deep , deep ditch and we fell into it we're 100 , almost 100 of us fell into that ditch , very big . Now it sounds like something from a movie scene , but trust me , that's exactly what happened . And at this time I

Searching for Miracles

Speaker 1 13:16

was already walking with wooden crutches . You know , I'd grown out of . You know , holding my knee and bending over walking . I'd now learned how to start walking with crutches , but the crutches I was walking with at that time was wooden crutches , and so I fell into the ditch with the other people , and the whole place was dark . As we were inside the ditch , people were screaming .

Speaker 1 13:38

Now , when I fell into the ditch , I passed out . I don't know for how many seconds or how many minutes I passed out , but by the time I regained consciousness , everywhere was dark , everywhere was dark , and I was like like what's going on in my head ? I'm dead . Because I could hear screams , I could hear people shouting and because inside that ditch was dark . In my head I was saying to myself oh my god , I think I'm dead and I think this is hell . Because the screams were loud . You know that scream of fear because a lot of us didn't know what was happening at that time . So my head , so I died and I went to hell . And just as I was confused , disoriented , we had a voice Everybody stay calm . Everybody stay calm . We are going to pull you people , one after the other , just be calm . So at that point I said to myself okay , maybe I'm not just dead yet , because if I'm dead , I'm not sure anybody will be talking to us in hell the way they are talking to us . I'm not sure the demons talk this way . And we saw a bright light . Somebody shone a torchlight into that ditch and for the first time we were able to see a light . And they threw a rope and they started pulling us out , one after the other and eventually , when they pulled me out , I was still sad Because I was going back home , not being healed from my Situation or my disability .

Speaker 1 15:26

And as I was going home that day Now I was trekking home I trekked to the venue . I was also trekking back home that night , and as I was trekking back home , I trekked to the venue . I was also trekking back home that night and as I was trekking back home , I said to myself this is it , I'm done . Never will I go out again in search of miracles or for healing . I told myself today I'm going to finally accept myself for who I am , the way I am , this situation or this condition , and I'm just going to make something good out of my life . And that was what I did . I stopped looking for miracles , I just accepted the situation and I started learning to adapt , or adapt to the situation , and I continued life basically .

Speaker 1 16:24

And so , years down the line , I learned how to appreciate myself for who I am , with my disability , with my situation . I didn't want to bother myself for who I am , with my disability , with my situation . I didn't want to bother myself about it anymore . But then I also realized that I was blessed with a lot of talent . A lot of talent Like what I'm doing today is a talent that I was blessed with , and so I started working on my talent , knowing that one day , an opportunity will come and I would have to be prepared .

Speaker 1 17:03

So what am I telling this story ?

Accepting Myself and Moving Forward

Speaker 1 17:05

I'm telling the story because I feel like a lot of people need to learn . A lot of people feel like their situation is the worst situation on earth . No , your situation is not the worst situation on earth . I just told you a part of my story and a whole lot more that I'm still going to tell you , just to let you know the struggles I've faced over the years .

Speaker 1 17:26

But you have to come to a point where you do not allow your situations drown you . You find a coping mechanism to survive . You survive and move on , because life is not going to give you what you want . In most cases , life will never give you what you want . You have to take it by force . And in trying to take it by force , you have to take it by force . And

The Rehab Bonki Crusade Experience

Speaker 1 17:53

in trying to take it by force , you're going to . You know you're going to have to believe in yourself , trust in yourself , trust the process , and that's what I did .

Speaker 1 18:13

Anyway , this is where I come to an end on this episode of the butterbox podcast , and I do hope I've been able to use my story to motivate you , to encourage you and let you know that , no matter what you're going through , somebody else has it worse than you , you understand , but somehow they've been able to manage it , live with it and hope that tomorrow will get better . Like I always tell people that hope is the currency we spend for tomorrow , any man that has hope has a future . And , like I always say , the matter does not matter until it begins to matter . And , of course , you know this is the Battlebox podcast . You can always listen to us on all our streaming platforms . Also , follow us on all our various social media platforms as well . At Battlebox , make sure you subscribe to our YouTube channel . And until I come your way on the next episode of the BattleBot Podcast , I'm signing out . Bata , bata , bata , bata , bata Bots .