WTHII Radio - A Nostalgic Look at the End of the World

Chet's got the greatest radio show in the world, and it's about to end forever.

Transcript

SPEAKER_03 0:00

The clock has struck and it's that time again on WTHI Radio. What the hell is it? Today we bring you all the tracks ashore to soothe your soul, tame your ticker, and colour your world. I'm Ket Baker Bunker, and I'm thrilled to be with you this evening for a journey down Nostalgia River. So grab that bottle of champagne, light up a cigar, hold your lover close, and listen to the sweet sounds of Eloquipo del Norte and their big hit, Bossa Gogo. What the hell is it? The weather looks like nuclear clouds of irradiated THC this evening, followed by golden showers and a warm sunny afternoon tomorrow. Let's turn now to a different style of great classic 1930s and hold on to your bootstraps and tie up your tits and bits as we present Amy Rowe and her number one hit, the beautiful dreamer. Time runs funny when you got no money. Yes, it's your favorite DJ. The man with the plan, the voice of Joyce, the speaker with the bigger room, sweet, sweet. We take you now around the corner and into the ballroom. Who doesn't love bombs? Bomb, everybody? I say here's another track from Linda Marsini. Lit and legit. Take it away. Welcome to WTHII Radio. What the hell is it? Our show, Dancing Back into Time, is sponsored by the Mutual of Omaha, Nordic Pillow. And Gonko Gorilla Sanctuaries protecting gorillas all over the world from human predators. We'll be right back after a word from our sponsors.

SPEAKER_00 13:13

Hey there, folks. Listen up. The world's about to go full mad max barbecue, and you're still sleeping on a queen mattress like it's 2019. Mushroom clouds and jacket with radiation rain and double jacket. Your neighbor Karen turning into a glowing Halloween decoration. You betcha. But guess what I've got sitting on my lot right now? Genuine, slightly pre-loved deluxe apocalypse edition bunker. Only one previous owner. He uh didn't make it to closing. But that's just more savings for you. Twelve inches of rebar reinforced concrete, and air so filtered, it smells like victory, and a five-year supply of freeze-dried lasagna. Because even when civilization ends, the dinner's still gotta be Italian. Am I right? Radiation? My shelter laughs at gamma rays and my wiring's basically Amish. Good luck running that. And get it. If the four horsemen themselves show up, I've got a little peephole so you can flip them the bird in comfort in the next sixty seconds, and I'll throw in a free radiation detector that may or may not have batteries. But hey, optimism is free. Don't wait for the flash. By then it's too late to haggle. Because when the world ends, you deserve leather red recliners underground. Operators are standing by enhancement No refunds after Armageddon. Some assembly required. Once again, operators are standing by.

SPEAKER_03 14:56

Look at the door. Hide in the cellar. They're coming to get you. Free speech is out of style. Fuck you. And fuck all of you. We've got fire. We've got drones. We've got plenty of drones. And it's only a matter of time before everything's fucked shut down and put away forever. Let's hear the glorious melodies of Martin Landstrom and kill your darling.