Recovering from Conflict

In this episode, Jacqui examines the nature of recovery after conflict and discusses attempts to regulate in her own life and shares some considered, empathic observations along the way.

This latest episode will challenge your ability to self-reflect and support you in discovering your own way to recover following a conflict that seems unmanageable in your life.

"We must never stop bringing our whole self to the table. After conflict, we must always remember to be kind to ourselves."

"Know that there is an end to all things - no matter how enduring and incapacitating it is in that moment. Hang on to the hope that it ends. There is an end, and you will be okay."

If you want to discuss this episode further or any other queries about how we can work together next year, get in touch on connect@communitymattersmedia.org

Stay tuned for the next episode as we build your capacity with Community Matters Media. Stay strong and #StayConnected

Music by Bensound.com/royalty-free-music

License code: U6EWJCDDX8XNCHJ7

Transcript

Recovering_from_Conflict_S5_Episode_01_FINAL_090425
Jacqui: [00:00:00] Hello, hello. Welcome to Season five and another episode of Community Creatives. This is Jacqui joining you again. I am so happy that you decided to press play. I wanna talk to you today about a big issue. It may be a bit triggering. So if you clicked play, I want to hope that you felt ready to examine this topic, and if you are feeling challenged by anything, I would never want to add to the burden of whatever's going on in your life.
So sometimes we need to pause and breathe and just sit with these feelings and come back. If you want to flag this episode and pin it and come back to it, I would love, love, love for you to join me another day when you're feeling [00:01:00] like you're doing okay. If you're still with me, let's get into it.
Conflict has many faces. I guess what really inspired me to talk about this today was recovering from the conflict that we feel and we cannot escape from our children, and dealing with the tension that's thick in the air and the constancy and monotony of parenting and struggling with the everyday. So, as I said, conflict has many faces and I respect where you are at in your life and hey, maybe for you, parenting is not the most challenging ball in the air I am happy for you. If that is the case, it's important to not compare and no matter what your burdens are, no matter what those balls in the air are. That you're trying not [00:02:00] to drop. I salute you on your journey because I know that it is just as hard as anybody else. Don't take those opportunities to devalue your struggles because other people might have it harder.
Yeah, maybe they do, but it doesn't take away from your heart. Your heart is justified. My heart is justified. If you're going for a rough time, then you're going for a rough time. It is what it is. So when you are recovering from conflict, what do you need in your life to protect yourself? How do you heal? I actually really wanna know, I wanna hear from people about their real experiences and their struggles because it is authentically their story and we need a village.
My gosh, we, we just don't have villages [00:03:00] anymore. And it's isolating. The more digital and fast our world becomes, the more we are building bridges that we are not crossing and we stand on the fast side and we can't connect and we can't reach each other, and life just keeps zooming on by. From one side of the bridge to the other, but hey, we're just not even there.
I feel like sometimes we're bystanders in this fast-paced world and it's hard. The more disconnect we're feeling, the breakdown in community, the breakdown in connection, it makes us that much more lonely. So I really wanna know, how do you recover? Let's talk about this. How do you regulate after these run-ins with conflict?
How do you find yourself after you've been through these [00:04:00] struggles and you are trying to put yourself back together piece by piece by piece? So right now I am trying to figure that out. Coming in from some pretty heavy conflict that has been enduring for a long time and I'm so tired, I don't wanna do it anymore.
You know, sometimes I just wish that things would just be a bit easier. But one thing I realized that is a blessing, but it's also a curse. I feel so deeply. I feel everything and I feel for everyone, and it's hard to know when, when I'm gonna protect myself and how I'm going to protect myself. And then when I throw myself all in, how do I recover?
I don't know exactly what those answers are. [00:05:00] I feel like I'm getting there. I'm learning. And I know that you're learning too. If you press play today, then I know that you're trying super hard and I applaud your efforts. Keep doing what you are doing because you are awesome to show up and to keep bringing your whole self to the table.
We must never stop bringing our whole self after conflict. We need to remember to be kind to ourselves. You sit in it as long as you need to, but remember, there are people and your life waiting on the other side of the bridge and there is an end. Know that there is an end all things, no matter how hard.
Depleting and exhausting and [00:06:00] all enduring and incapacitating it seems in that moment. Hang on to the hope that it ends. You will be okay. Find the things you need to do to regulate, protect yourself, recover, take breaths and remove yourself mentally and physically from situations that cause you harm.
There's so much that you have to give, but in order to give that, you simply must learn how to recover. How to find wellness within yourself. How to rise above whatever burdens you are carrying and get back on your path and take those steps. You've got this. Hang in there. I know you can find yourself again, and I know you can find the best way forward with how to recover from the conflict that you carry.
Listen to your heart. Listen to [00:07:00] yourself. What works for other people might not work for you. You've got this and you can do this. Let's recover. Let's shake off the conflict of the day and our lives and know that we can heal.
All my love, Jacqui.