%20(6).jpg)
MilSpouse House
MilSpouse House
Our Top 5 Things To Do Before Your Spouse Gets Out Of The Military
Today we talk about the top 5 things to do before your spouse gets out of the military! Whether your spouse has served 4 years, 14 years, or 24 years... this episode is a MUST LISTEN TO episode for every milspouse!
****
Do you know a veteran who is struggling to win their VA disability claim? Help your service member and check out VA Claims Insider! Schedule your FREE 30-minute, no-obligation Discovery Call with a team member! Click here now!!
Resources mentioned in today's episode:
The Complete VA Disability Claims List
VA Presumptive List
The GI Bill
GI Bill School Comparison Tool
VA Home Loans
Veterans Career Transition Program (Top 8 Options and More!)
Military Spouse Transition Program (MySTEP)
Approaching Your Spouse about Post-Military Depression
Instagram: milspouse_house
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/milspousehouse
Website: milspousehouse.vaclaimsinsider.com
Veterans helping veterans get the VA disability rating and compensation they deserve by law!
Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase, I may receive a commission at no extra cost to you.
00:00:00] Erin: If you are a veteran and have filed a VA disability claim and have been denied, have received a low rating, or you're unsure how to get started. Reach out to us, go to vac free thirty.com, LinkedIn, our show notes and take advantage of a free VA claim discovery. Call learn what you've been missing so you can finally get the disability rating and compensation you deserve.
[00:00:33] Welcome back mil spouses to another episode of MilSpouse House! Today, it will just be me, Erin, your cohost, but don't worry! Next week, Molly will be back with us and I'm excited to have her hosting with me again. So let's just jump right into it.
[00:00:52] today, I want to talk about five things that we think you and your spouse should do before transitioning [00:01:00] out of the military, whether your service member has been in for four years, done the full 20, maybe got halfway and decided they wanted to do something else, or they needed to do something else.
[00:01:12] Everybody goes through this at some point in their military career. At some point, your service member will transition to civilian life. So let's just dive into it.
[00:01:25] The first thing on our list is to help convince your spouse to get their butt to the doctor. While you're a service member may have been hesitant to go to the doctor during their career, it is of the upper most importance that they go before they separate. Work this into your transitioning to civilian life plan.
[00:01:47] And while your service member does go through a program while they're in service, I think it's 180 days out, of their actual ETS day, which is their separation date. They do go through a [00:02:00] program to tell them what they need to do before transitioning out of the military.
[00:02:03] But I think you, as the spouse should also kind of keep track of things that need to be done and kind of create a plan for yourself. Put in your calendars at 180 days before their separation date, they make an appointment for everything that has been bothering them. And just for a regular checkup, too.
[00:02:23] This way, if they need to file for VA disability for any condition, that condition can be clearly traced back to their service. This is called service connection. The goal of military disability is to compensate veterans for any condition that may have been caused or made worse by their time in service. Whether they got injured during combat, on-duty, or in training.
[00:02:49] I know that my husband has a lot of issues with his feet due to rucking for miles and miles while carrying heavy equipment. So getting his feet checked is something that I always encourage him to [00:03:00] do.
[00:03:00] And to everyone listening, I know how hard it is to convince your service member, to go to the doctor, but try to remind them that getting these records now makes it so much easier in the future.
[00:03:14] When a veteran receives compensation for their service, doors are opened. They can get access to healthcare after service, financial security, some states provide property tax exemptions for disabled vets, there are educational benefits and the list goes on.
[00:03:32] Don't be afraid of the term disability.
[00:03:34] Disability comes in all ranges of severity and you would be surprised by some of the conditions the VA recognizes as something that can be caused by a vet's service.
[00:03:46] There are over 800 medical conditions on the VA disability claims list. We will link that list in our show notes. VA claims insider has a great blog on this actually, and it's called the complete [00:04:00] VA disability claims list.
[00:04:01] And while reading through it, I personally was amazed at everything that can be service connected. There's also some disabilities that are considered presumptive disabilities. This means the VA has noticed a trend in medical conditions that many vets receive after serving in certain circumstances in specific locations during specific times.
[00:04:24] So even though there may not be a lot of medical proof that the condition is caused by time and service. There is enough evidence to convince the VA that it is service-related. The VA compiled a list of conditions that fall in this category called the VA presumptive list.
[00:04:43] And we've also added that link to this list. In our show notes. Examples of this category would be exposure to agent orange for Vietnam and Korean vets. If the vet was exposed to radiation or was a [00:05:00] prisoner of war and all kinds of other circumstances. So check out that list as well.
[00:05:05] You never know.
[00:05:06] Second, make sure they know their educational benefits. And of course the big educational benefit is the GI bill. So the GI bill can cover the full cost of in-state tuition and fees. There are rates for private schools that can be covered, but there's a cap for those schools. With the GI bill, you can also receive money for housing.
[00:05:31] The monthly allowance for housing is based upon the cost of living where your school is located. You can also receive up to a thousand dollars for books and supplies, and there's also a small stipend of $500 that can help with relocation costs if you had to move to go to school. So for example, in looking up the university of Kentucky, They cover full tuition and they give around [00:06:00] $1,200 a month for housing, which for that area is appropriate for cost of living.
[00:06:06] There are requirements for receiving the GI bill to its entirety, and that is based on time and service. If your spouse served a full 36 months or more, than they'll receive the full benefit. The VA has a great school comparison tool that we will also link in our show notes and it's to help you see how much tuition is covered and what the housing allowance for that particular school is.
[00:06:31] So for example, I looked up the university of Kentucky and of course being a public school, the tuition was covered and the monthly housing allowance was $1,200, which for that area in Kentucky is quite appropriate for cost of living.
[00:06:45] So the GI bill covers 48 months of education, which is the usual amount of time it takes to receive a bachelor's degree. You can also use your GI bill to go to a vocational school, do a work study program on the job [00:07:00] training and apprenticeship, and many more that we will link in our show notes for you to look through.
[00:07:05] The veteran can also transfer their GI bill to a qualified dependent. Your service member also may qualify to receive tuition assistance while they are active duty. Not only will using this program help your service member in promotions, but also have knowledge for another career post-service making transitioning out of the military into the civilian world a lot easier. So whatever branch you're a service member is in check out their tuition assistance program.
[00:07:36] For an example, my husband actually took advantage of the army tuition assistance program, which allowed him to take a few classes each semester for free while on active duty.
[00:07:46] So he received his associates degree while in service. So his plan for his GI bill is actually to use two years to finish his bachelor's and then if he wants to, he can [00:08:00] use the rest of his GI bill to go to school for two more years and receive his masters. I mean, to get a master's for free is almost unbelievable and is an amazing benefit that every vet needs to take advantage of.
[00:08:15] Number three, learn about how to get a VA loan. Some families go ahead and use this while they're in service. But a lot of us have just been renting for years because we move every two years and don't really want to put down roots yet. So now this is something I'm learning more about every day, because we are actually looking to buy a home after our time in Korea.
[00:08:39] Personally, we went through veterans United and connected with them for assistance. As we had no idea where to start. And I will say they've been amazing.
[00:08:50] For a lot of military families, buying home is a new and exciting adventure when transitioning out of the military. It's exciting to feel you may [00:09:00] plant roots somewhere you own after moving around every couple of years living in on-base housing or rentals.
[00:09:08] Simply put a VA loan is a $0 down mortgage option for veterans and active duty service members. While they are issued through private lenders, they are guaranteed through the VA. A VA loan doesn't require you to have a private mortgage insurance, and it has a low average fixed interest and it makes it much easier to quality.
[00:09:32] There are a few different types of VA loans. There's a VA purchase loan VA interest rate reduction refinance loan known as I R R L, a VA cashout refinance and a VA energy efficient mortgage. We won't go over each of those today, but we will provide the veterans United page with all the explanations in our show notes.
[00:09:52] With a VA purchasing loan, you can save thousands of dollars with its low interest rates [00:10:00] and no money down policy, making it easier for service members transitioning out of the military and starting their new life as a civilian. The VA also limits the amount of closing costs that can be charged.
[00:10:12] Also it's a lifetime benefit. That's a myth that we hear all the time, a veteran who qualifies can in fact use this program, even if they've already used the program before. The loan is the safest option for veterans and their families looking to buy a new one. So I will definitely keep you all updated as we go through our VA loan journey in the event that you've never used it before.
[00:10:39] And I got to say, it's super exciting. Buying a house can be super intimidating and confusing, but I have to say with veterans United, I feel very comfortable and I feel like they truly care and want us to be set up to be successful.
[00:10:57] Another important step to think about when [00:11:00] transitioning out of the military is veteran career transition programs and military spouse transition programs. As spouses, we have to remember that it can be hard for the whole family to enter civilian life. But luckily there are many programs that can help ease this transition.
[00:11:19] At VA claims insider, we have a great blog on the top eight veteran career transition programs, and I will also add that link to our show notes. These programs are usually free and they help the veteran learn what it's like to work for a private employer, how to communicate with your civilian coworkers, as well as helping the veteran learn how to talk about their expertise in a manner that is applicable to the civilian employer.
[00:11:47] These programs assist in writing resumes and conducting mock interviews for our veterans who haven't had to worry about such things while they were in service. I mean, think about it. They [00:12:00] probably haven't written a resume in years.
[00:12:03] Military one source also provides a transition program for spouses. It's called MYSTEP and it's a program made just for us. This program teaches you how to financially plan for your family's transition, provides employment assistance, debt management, how to find local mental and health services, and so much more.
[00:12:27] We may not feel like we need help, but it's okay to go through these programs to see if there's anything you haven't considered. Is there anything missing in your transition plan? Go into this next chapter as prepared as you can be so you can enjoy the journey together.
[00:12:48] Things are going to pop up. Unknowns and unpredictables are going to happen, but if you are prepared for everything else, then you'll have the [00:13:00] capacity to put appropriate attention to those things that come up that you just didn't expect.
[00:13:05] And the fifth thing I want to discuss today is be aware your spouse may go through post-military depression.
[00:13:12] Be aware you and your spouse may find it difficult at times. VACI also has an article called approaching your spouse about post military depression. That will also be linked in our show notes.
[00:13:26] This is important for us spouses to keep in mind. Our service member is going to experience a major life change.
[00:13:35] According to our studies, over 1.7 million service members have received mental health help through the VA in the year 2021. Such big changes can cause our service members, now veteran, major challenges that can develop into depression. Veterans can feel an additional pressure when wanting to provide for their family. They have more time to be at [00:14:00] home, which is a new family dynamic shift causing stress and uneasiness the fear of unemployment after service, not feeling like they belong to a community anymore.
[00:14:13] And oftentimes, more time to reflect on triggering events that occurred in service. Post-military depression can come in an array of symptoms. And in severity, you may find your spouse irritable, sad, anxious, unmotivated, they may have weight or appetite changes, decreased energy, loss of interest in activities they once enjoyed, and even the more severe symptoms of feeling hopeless and thoughts of suicide.
[00:14:47] As spouses we may be the first to see the signs, but how do we approach our veteran spouse? In the blog, I mentioned earlier, it goes through steps you can take to prepare yourself [00:15:00] and we recommend going through each step carefully.
[00:15:03] So first you want to make sure that you plan what you want to say so you can provide a safe and calm space for discussion. Don't improvise this. You could take it somewhere it just doesn't need to go. You want to prepare yourself to be quiet and actively listening to your spouse, practice, empathy, and acceptance.
[00:15:27] You may be frustrated about the state of your relationship, but don't let that overtake the conversation, don't criticize or judge, which can be tough when we think we know easy solutions. But showing understanding of their position will increase the likelihood of your spouse actually seeking help. also be sure to take care of yourself.
[00:15:52] You maintaining your mental health is critical in navigating this process with your spouse. [00:16:00] Know there is help and people who want to assist you. Free, confidential, emergency care is always available with the veteran crisis line at 1-800-273-8255.
[00:16:19] I'll read that again, but we will also link it in our show notes, 1-800-273-8255, and that's free, confidential, emergency care for vets. It's always available. You can call that number at any time. The VA can provide help for your spouse in times of need. And if you feel comfortable reaching out to us at MilSpouse House, we are always here to guide you in the right direction.
[00:16:48] Our website has a contact form that goes directly to our inbox. We are always here to give you the resources you need. Transitioning into civilian life [00:17:00] can be scary. It can be stressful. It can be exhausting and it could be exciting. Know your benefits, know your resources and create your plan.
[00:17:12] Remember, plans can change, but your attitude is everything.
[00:17:17] MilSpouses, I hope this helps. If you're going through this transition now or in the near future, or if you've already been through this transition and you feel stuck and you feel like there's just something missing, maybe your spouse is underrated with their VA disability and aren't being compensated properly. They aren't getting the care that they truly need reach out to us. We are connected with veterans who are actually helping other veterans get their VA disability claims approved and helping them through this process. If there's something that you, as a spouse, feel like you need another resource that we can help you find, use that [00:18:00] contact form on our website.
[00:18:01] I'm happy to connect you with the proper organization or proper resource to help you through this journey. We're a family here. We're a community, and we're the only ones who understand what each other is going through. And we even go through our own unique challenges as well.
[00:18:20] But. We hope this helps. And as always from our house to yours, have a great day.
[00:18:31]
[00:18:35] Erin: Mil spouse house is brought to you by VA claims insider let's face it. The VA claims process is a pain, many veterans struggled for years trying to increase their ratings or even get rated at all. Most are not getting the compensation they deserve. Here at VA claims insider we've supported more than 15,000 veterans to win their claims and increase their ratings.[00:19:00]
[00:19:00] Now it's your turn schedule, your free via claim discovery call with one of our team members. By going to vacifree30.com linked our show notes, and you'll learn what gaps you need to fill to speed up your claim and increase your rates.