Episode 255 | Travis Talbert musician

Musician Travis Talbert joins The Imperfect Dads Podcast for a powerful conversation about grief, fatherhood, sobriety, faith, and finding purpose through life's hardest moments.

Travis opens up about the heartbreaking experience of losing a child as an infant and how that loss shaped him as a husband and father. He also shares what it's been like raising three children after that tragedy, why being present for his family matters more than ever, and how quitting alcohol changed his life.

Beyond parenting, we talk about Travis's work as a pedal steel guitarist, balancing music with family life, his children's educational experiences, and his evolving journey with religion, spirituality, curiosity, and critical thinking. It's an honest conversation about growth, resilience, and what it means to keep showing up for the people you love.

In this episode, we discuss:

• Losing a child as an infant and navigating grief
• Raising three children after loss
• Fatherhood and being present for your family
• Quitting alcohol and the impact of sobriety
• Travis's journey with religion and spirituality
• Critical thinking, curiosity, and personal growth
• Playing pedal steel guitar and performing while raising a family
• Navigating your kids' educational experiences
• Making the most of summertime with your children

If you enjoy conversations about fatherhood, grief, parenting, sobriety, music, faith, mental health, and personal growth, be sure to like, subscribe, and share this episode.

#TravisTalbert #Fatherhood #ParentingPodcast #Grief #InfantLoss #Sobriety #Recovery #PedalSteel #Musician #Faith #Spirituality #MentalHealth #TheImperfectDadsPodcast

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This podcast is part of the Never A Phase Network, follow them on instagram at @neveraphasenetwork and check out their podcasts like Emo Kids Anonymous  Wasting Time Podcast Certified Fangirl and The Ska Mailman

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:03

Welcome to the Imperfect Dads Podcast. You believe about their family. But they don't always have a space to discuss what their life looks like. Our podcast has a space for dads to discuss the ups and downs of other and how they feel like they're holding it together. Or how they're not. Thank you for joining us for this episode. This podcast is part of the Never of Faced Network. Make sure to follow them on Instagram. Go to the website Never of Faced Network.com. On this episode, we have a musician, Travis Talbert. This conversation started out a little heavy at first. Ask Travis how many kids he had and he actually lost a child whenever they were an infant. So we talked about uh bereavement, losing a child, and um what that experience was like for him. We also talk about having three kids after that experience, playing pedal steel guitar, uh his kid's education experience, his journey with the religion spirituality, critical thinking and curiosity, quitting alcohol and what that experience has been like for him, being around for kids and playing shows around town and what summertime is like with his kids. Just like one more thing.

SPEAKER_01 1:04

Just start the episode.

SPEAKER_00 1:07

Oh, my bad. First off, uh first question I usually ask Travis after saying, Hey, welcome to an episode of The Imperfect Dad. I appreciate you taking your time to do this. Yeah, is um how many kids you got? Ages, all that good stuff.

SPEAKER_02 1:25

Uh so we have three uh three with us that uh my my son is the youngest, he's three. Then we have Ellie, who is uh 10, then my daughter Hazel is 12, and then our firstborn before them, uh, he lived his whole life at children's hospital. He made it to about seven months. Uh oh, okay, gotcha. Yeah. I figure that's pertinent to this conversation. So yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:50

Yeah. It it is. How um I first of all, I'm sorry for the loss of your child.

SPEAKER_02 1:56

That's uh um how how long ago was it if I He was born in September 2012, and they lived into the beginning of 2013.

SPEAKER_00 2:06

Okay. What was the gap between having uh your first child and your second child? It was about a year and a half.

SPEAKER_02 2:13

Uh Hazel was born in 2014. Okay, cool. Nice.

SPEAKER_00 2:19

Yeah. How's it? Um I've had on other dads who have lost a child and everything. Um yeah, it's uh thank you for leading with that. Because it is kind of like like hey, this is actually part of my story. Yeah, I try and be pretty forthcoming with it.

SPEAKER_02 2:32

Um I'd say especially like the people that know me real well know that I'm perfectly willing to like I like talking about him. I've you know it's um his his life like it was it was complicated. I mean, but everybody's life's complicated. And uh it really it it it taught me so many things that I think about constantly every day, and it kind of solidified so many things about how I see the world and um uh now I feel like I've missed missed your uh your question.

SPEAKER_00 3:09

Uh that's uh it's uh it's uh me wanting to make sure to give space like to discuss your your firstborn child and everything, and being like, oh, thanks for um I I mean that that's such a um yeah, even like, hey man, I just met you like five minutes ago and here we are talking about like a very good thing.

SPEAKER_02 3:24

Well yes, and uh um I uh yeah, it's funny like I uh and not to like not to like reference another podcast. I did a podcast uh with a friend of mine where um a lot of that was about talking about the first time that I really did tell us that I remember telling a stranger uh as I met him. So I I did this interview with somebody where I was talking about the first time that I that I decided, like in casual conversation, like I was on the road playing somewhere, and uh and this person I was talking to that uh it was his club, and we were talking about our families, and I decided like I'm just gonna say this, like how it is. And I told this guy that I had never met, kind of the same way I met, and he said the exact same thing had happened to him. And that was the first person I ever told that. So, you know, that like that that didn't know. And and so now like I don't know, you know, that made it seem like uh a thing that I already knew was you know, like you know that everybody goes through this, but um uh y you know, you're never far away from somebody like everybody loses people, so it's it's not something to shy away from, at least to me, you know, and I think it's actually it's much more helpful to talk about things than it is to not.

SPEAKER_00 4:57

Yeah. It is and I mean already my assumption is like, oh man, you've seen some shit and you've probably experienced some some shit. And so that's like honestly is why it's like, oh, you and your wife have probably known each other really well because that's such a deeply intimate thing to like go through together and to experience each other and then like have kids afterwards. I'm like, oh that's um that's a journey, I guess, is what my mind usually goes to if someone tells me that. For sure. Yeah, I I agree with all what you just said. There's uh there's a group called the Sad Dad's Club, which is uh a nonprofit created for uh bereaved fathers or fathers who have lost a child, and they're like tagline or whatever you want to call it is um best guys worst club, where it's like you they've met some of the best guys, but the reason you're in this club together is one of the most atro like awful things you could possibly go through. Okay, so tell me again. So you have do you go daughter, daughter, son? Is that the order after your firstborn? Yeah, his name was Tobin. Then I've got Hazel, Ellie, and uh and Leon. Nice, cool. We also I have three kids. It goes daughter, daughter, son, and um, I I feel like the son made me think like after having two daughters, we were like, oh, we understand daughters, we understand how this works. And then having a son was just like, never mind, gotta reset all of my knowledge base, everything I think I know what I'm doing, because it's just having a son is a different having two of one gender and then one of another is just such a different experience.

SPEAKER_02 6:22

Uh yeah, I mean like I know what you I know what you mean, but I just try not to think about things like that. Uh-huh. In well, at least in those kind of uh terms. And I mean like honestly, like we've got all three of them in the same room. Mm-hmm. You know, and the the girls are old enough that they're they're a big help with them and they like having them around. So um I feel like he's getting you know, I only I grew up with I I just had a younger brother. Um I feel like I feel like there's gotta be something like more worldly about growing up with uh you know like a a wider perspective in the household for you know for all of um that that I didn't get. So I don't know. They're gonna be their own people anyway. So what am I what do I know?

SPEAKER_00 7:12

Well, as long as uh we have this moment with our son where the two older ones, so mine are 10, 8, and he'll be five in September. Similar kind of vibes. Similar, yeah. But we're finding that whenever the two my daughters want to help him, there's the moments where he's like, no, I got this. Like his need for independence is greater. So yeah, it's it's real fun to have them be like to look at a kid and be like, what you're doing has really good intentions. He hates everything right now.

SPEAKER_02 7:39

And that's not about Yeah, like they always want to help him, and I and I'm like, you gotta get out of his face. Like that's you know, my man does not want you up in his up in his face like that. You know, he this is not the time for a hug. No, it's not. I mean it probably is, but he doesn't want it.

SPEAKER_00 7:59

It the timing might be good. His willingness to receive the love you want to offer him is not there. So uh and also like when they're a baby, you do like get like you know this close to their face. So like to teach your kids like, hey, actually, like now you can have physical distance from to understand you and see you is like takes them a bit to understand too, I think. Our daughters share a room and her son has his own room currently. Uh what made you guys be like, hey, this I'll just do one room for all three kids. Is it just like necessity, or is it was it more intentional? Uh necessity.

SPEAKER_02 8:32

I mean like so our house, we um uh there's there's two bedrooms upstairs. Um and there's this room that I'm in is in the basement, and it's it could function as a bedroom one day. Uh but currently I use this as a teaching, like I teach guitar a couple days a week out of uh out of this room. It's got a door right outside. It's kind of perfect for that. Um and at one time there were six kids in this house. Like they had four girls upstairs and two down here. Um, and I know that because um we bought the house from um it was my mom was friends with all the siblings that live that grew up here that were part of the six that lived here. Um they got like this was my high school principal's uh bedroom that I'm in right now. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 9:27

Nice. I was just gonna say it it it is interesting because like my dad is one of five, and I think yeah, their house had like two, maybe three bedrooms. So yeah, they all shared rooms. And it's and interesting that like having the ability to have like two kids in one room, one room, they to have kids have their own space and stuff, like feels like a luxury to some extent, or like privilege. It's like, oh, you guys can all have your own space. It's like, well, they don't need that, it's but if you can have it, it's it's an interesting mental thing.

SPEAKER_02 9:54

Yeah, like it's like also I'm trying to think it was probably I read a uh biography of Robbie Shankar a few years ago that he was talking about like just growing up uh you know a hundred years ago in India and just how many people in that family lived in the same like the whole family was in one, you know, like slept in the same room. And you think about like the you know the reality of that, uh yeah, it it is all coming down to like what you want versus what you need, you know.

SPEAKER_00 10:32

Yeah, yeah, pretty much. Yeah, I remember we uh my wife and I before we had kids, um, we're able to do a trip to the Philippines, like Manila. And yeah, like you've got like how many million people in a on one island? And it was like, oh, so like all the things I think I need are more comfort than necessity. And it's I'm trying not to add like a value to it of like it's good, I want comfort, it's bad I want comfort. It's like nope, you have the option for comfort and you're choosing it, and you know what? This I just acknowledge what it is.

unknown 11:02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 11:03

Yeah, every time I've been to New York City, I like I like it a little more every time, but I'm like, no way I can live here. No way. Yep.

SPEAKER_00 11:12

Uh New York for like three days is great. That's like the amount of time. And much more than that, I'm like, oh my god. Like this it's just a lot of stimulation. And yeah, man, it's uh not I don't know how you sustain the day-to-day rhythm with that much like things coming at your life.

SPEAKER_02 11:30

Yeah, I think there's certain people that probably thrive on it, but you know, like I like I like it to be kind of well, not kind like I I like when it's completely quiet sometimes, you know? Yeah. And uh I've never had that there.

unknown 11:45

No.

SPEAKER_00 11:46

No. No, I don't think it's possible. What uh my kids all like to read a lot, which means their house is usually pretty quiet. What are your what are your kids into? Do they like reading? Do they like more quiet activities?

SPEAKER_02 11:56

Yeah, I mean they're they're very relaxed, uh, you know, um very easy to be around. Uh my oldest daughter is real into the Harry Potter books right now and is reading a lot. Um the younger one was uh at least toward they they just got out of school last week, but she was she's been enjoying those Lemony Snickets books. Oh yeah. Um which I've never read either of those uh series, you know. Um my son is definitely the loudest uh of the bunch. And uh but you know, he's he's laid back when he needs to be, and you know, and um my wife's a teacher, so she's off for the summer now. Um she has endless things planned every summer for them for the whole, you know, the whole time. So they really pack it all in.

SPEAKER_00 12:51

Nice. That's cool. That's uh do you guys we do libraries a lot. I'm a I'm a stay-at-home parent, so whenever it's whenever it's summertime, it's me and all three kids at home. And I feel like a lot of going to the zoo, going to science center, or going to uh yeah, libraries is kind of like where we live during the summer. Yeah, uh pro library.

SPEAKER_02 13:11

We we do love the library.

SPEAKER_00 13:13

Um we we do too. It seems like uh because I don't know about you, but like I rarely reread books. I don't know if you read much as like uh grown-up and everything, but like I feel like I rarely come back to books as kind of like a one and done. Um yeah, I I I would say I read compulsively.

SPEAKER_02 13:32

Um and I I have things that I have read more than once, um but not a ton. Like I can I could probably name the ones I've read multiple times on both hands. Like I've read uh Demon Haunted World by Carl Sagan at least four times. Um I've read the Malcolm Malcolm X's autobiography multiple times. The Boys of Summer by Roger Kahn.

SPEAKER_01 14:03

Um uh Winesburg, Ohio.

SPEAKER_02 14:09

Uh those ones. Uh then everything else is a pretty kind of like I don't even I I stopped even keeping books. I I started reselling them to get them out. Um just because I figure they're gonna do better for somebody else if they're out there and they can read them.

SPEAKER_00 14:29

Yep. Unless I have I I I feel the same. Unless I have like a really strong emotional connection to the author or the book after I read it. For the most part, I'm like, I might never pick this up again and like it's just gonna take up shelf space. So maybe take it somewhere.

SPEAKER_02 14:44

Yeah, the thing that well, and I even have kind of like a one-in, one out policy with my records now, um, where I'm just I'm not gonna get more storage space. Uh we've got the yep. We've got most of the dining room. Um, so if they don't fit, something's gotta go.

SPEAKER_00 15:01

Yeah. That's the hardest for me, because I will buy something and then I'll like realize something else has come out that I want to buy, and then I'll buy it, but it's before I even took the time to listen to the album I just bought. So no, that is uh I need to be better about that because I do that a lot of like I'm just gonna but I you know I'm supporting local record stores and musicians, so I should just keep on buying them and not think about it.

SPEAKER_02 15:23

I mean, I think you should. I don't think you know, the like but yeah, at a certain point it's always good to just you gotta weed the garden a little bit.

SPEAKER_01 15:32

A little bit.

SPEAKER_00 15:34

A little bit. Or be like, I didn't remember I had this album. Cool. Do you need to keep it then?

SPEAKER_01 15:41

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 15:42

It can be that for sure. It can be. What's uh for your oldest, is she in middle school now? Is she or is she in high school?

SPEAKER_02 15:50

So she she'll be going into seventh grade next year. But they they're all like it's all like one big elementary thing until high school form.

SPEAKER_00 15:59

So okay. What was your exp in my experience? I did K through eighth grade, all of the same school, but I went to like a small Lutheran private school. What was your experience? Did you have like K through fifth and then like middle school?

SPEAKER_02 16:14

I had the exact same experience that they're having because they are going to the same place that I went to grade school, which is uh a little Catholic school in uh like in our neighborhood. I'm in Latonia, Kentucky, which is uh just south of Cincinnati, like we're part of Covington area. Um and that was I would say even more at my wife's behest because um I you know, like I don't follow any sort of religion, like I'm an agnostic. I I I've kind of completely reject the whole idea, but uh I can't yeah, I I always have to kind of come back to the fact that I can't say that it didn't give me a good education. Um because it really did. Like that, you know, they sort of created a person who I think is very critical of of what they're telling me because of how they taught me to think. Um and so I guess maybe like I'm partially hoping that they'll end up the same way. I mean they're gonna form their own ideas about it anyway, but you know, it still is important to my to my wife and the rest of my family in a way that it isn't to me, but I don't um and then the other thing being that my wife is a a public school teacher and you know has a way more informal opinion on anything education-based than I ever will have. So I'm gonna defer to her. Yep.

SPEAKER_00 17:42

Yeah, since since I went to a Lutheran K through eighth grade school, yeah, my hope is that if you do go to a religious school of some sort, they're more honestly teaching you like a lot of critical thinking, which any school should be thinking teaching you. But like to me, that's more like curiosity should be like what's what's a creator? Why did this God create us? Is what I think a healthy version of religion should be. And I that's a whole side tangent of whenever religion is just about obedience and not about curiosity. And I also not a fan of that life.

SPEAKER_02 18:11

Yeah. Yeah, it just uh it doesn't make any sense to me, and I don't even think about it, honestly, on a day-to-day basis. And I mean, like I, you know, my kids all know that uh like and I I don't know. I I I don't know how in how to do anything other than just tell them like, yeah, I don't I don't believe any of that. I don't need Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 18:33

Yep. Yeah it it's been interesting because my wife and I both were raised like in uh religious settings. And to be like, whenever we've tried to do like a Sunday school or something like that for our kids, and they're like, you're a dirty sinner and you deserve hell. We're like, that's I don't like you saying that to my kid. And like I also don't know if I agree with that. So uh we're not coming back.

SPEAKER_02 18:52

Thanks. Yeah, that's not a good way to make uh make friends, I don't think. What part of the country did you grow up in? I grew up in Evansville. Oh, okay. Oh yeah, you did say that in one of the the messages. Okay, so you're yeah, you weren't far away.

SPEAKER_00 19:06

Yeah, I'm uh grew up along the Ohio, you know?

unknown 19:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 19:10

Yeah. But it's it's interesting to like think about what messages you heard as a kid and now have be it be a the parent and be like, uh yeah, no, that message was really damaging to me and did not teach me love or community. It taught me shame and guilt. And I would rather you guys not learn shame and guilt at a young age.

SPEAKER_02 19:27

Yeah, like you just start to like think about things that um whether or not I want to frame it that way, I guess I am kind of imparting some sort of guidance to how they're gonna look into the world. Um but I guess all I'm trying to do is be a little more objective about it than I feel like some of the people around me were because I don't um I like to tell them like you know, even when I'm saying something very uh sternly, I don't know what the hell I'm talking about.

SPEAKER_01 20:03

You know, like Yeah, yeah, no and nobody does.

SPEAKER_02 20:07

Like that's all you figure out the longer you go. It's like nobody knows what's happened. Like no one knows.

SPEAKER_01 20:12

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 20:13

No.

SPEAKER_00 20:15

But as a kid, whenever you're in like a religious circle, a part of a religious school, you're like, oh, this must be the correct way to live. And as an adult, I'm like, it's a way to live.

SPEAKER_02 20:23

And it is, it's a way to live.

SPEAKER_00 20:25

That's about it. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 20:26

Yeah. And there's you know, it's it's definitely like a community-building thing, and it's uh yeah, I guess that's the thing that I always kind of just find frustrating is that uh, you know, that you almost can't find like a large society that's figured out how to have communal kind of social gatherings that is you know removed from some sort of overarching religious thing that has almost always kind of uh got some fear, you know, looming in it. And yeah, you know, it's that's like bigger questions of like, why do we, you know, what do we're all just dreading something, I guess, you know. So like that's yeah, pretty much.

SPEAKER_00 21:08

Yep.

SPEAKER_02 21:09

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 21:09

Yeah. But maybe don't feed me what I'm dreading, you know. Like I'm already gonna be anxious. I'm already gonna be like, what if I die today? Like that's already gonna be in my conscience. So don't remind me every second I talk to you, you're gonna die one day.

SPEAKER_02 21:21

Like I already know. Yeah, but I mean, I guess, but like I, you know, just talking to you, like it seems like we have that kind of in common. But like, don't you ever meet people that you're like, I don't think that they're worried the way that I am right now? And I'm like, I wonder what that's like. Yep. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 21:36

Yes, yes. My wife and I will talk about that of like, because like, yeah, guilt or shame is like a natural response for me. It's like, hey, did you do this? And I'm like, oh, I feel guilt and shame. Well, you don't even like you don't even know what your answer to the question is yet. You're just already assuming guilt and shame. And we're like, so there are people who just don't feel guilt and shame as like their natural instinct. Huh. Whoa. That must be freaking. No, they have something else that fills the void. Um Self-hatred. But still, that's fascinating to know. Yeah, I don't know what that must be like. So it it's fun though to have kids and like um try to not repeat your mental warfare you go through every single day with the full knowledge of you don't really have that much control over. You just hopefully put them in scenarios where they can like learn to trust and love themselves because that's I feel like pretty important to teach a kid.

SPEAKER_02 22:27

Absolutely. Yeah.

unknown 22:28

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 22:29

I mean they're just little balls of autonomy. Um and I just want them to keep being there.

SPEAKER_00 22:35

Pretty much. And be decent, you know? Like, hey, let's just be a decent person, be nice to people, you know.

SPEAKER_02 22:39

I repeat the axiom in all kinds of aspects of life of don't suck, don't die, which was the the title of uh Kristen Hirsch had that book that she read about Vic Chestnut, and that was the title, and I was like, that is really everything. Pretty much pretty much just keep it simple, man. So we're probably done here, right?

SPEAKER_00 23:01

Yeah, that's it. That is it. Well, thank you so much. No, I I think uh I'll always say that like I think life has a lot of really simple answers, and then my mind likes to overcomplicate everything. So it is like, hey man, just be decent to people and try not to die today. And it's like, oh, that took a lot of work today. Today overcomplicated that message a lot.

SPEAKER_02 23:22

Yeah, I think I'm getting better at that, but I know what you mean. Like I um yeah, I've definitely overcomplicated things in my past.

SPEAKER_00 23:32

Yes. Well, let's talk about like um what do you what do you do for a living? I know you said you teach guitar lessons. Do you play like with the band or anything? Do you tour?

SPEAKER_02 23:40

Yeah, I do all that. Uh, and then I also I've worked at a record store in Cincinnati called Shake It for sixteen it's like coming on 16 years in a few weeks. Um I do that uh kind of like half the week. I teach the other half of the week, and then I do kind of uh play gigs and tour for different people. Um those things all adding up. Nice.

SPEAKER_00 24:08

Yeah. Yep. What's your what do you feel like your primary instrument is, or if you go out to play a show, what are you normally playing?

SPEAKER_02 24:16

Um the last few years, what I mostly play is pedal steel. Um but I I still just think of that as a guitar, and I just think of myself as a guitar player.

SPEAKER_00 24:27

I was gonna say I've tried pedal steel before and I cannot my brain just doesn't click with it. It's just I've messed with it a bit, but I haven't I've never been able to make it like even playing like slide guitar, I'm just like, oh, this is a different like I just need to practice more because I don't naturally like get it. Yeah, I I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 24:42

I mean, like steel I just think of as like it well, I mean, music in general, like especially guitar, I just think of like chess, where you have like all these possibilities. So there is a finite number of things that could happen, both, but it's almost incomprehensible for a human brain to kind of think of all of them. But then there's a lot of things that are pretty logical, so you can boil it down and like eliminate a bunch of other options. And so with steel, it's just about like you always have some tuning that you have to land underneath the bar, and then it's about like what can I do with these changes to make that the tuning that I need?

SPEAKER_00 25:23

Yeah, you're saying how you approach it, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 25:26

But now I I I bet you know, if you just hung out with it for a few weeks, I bet it'd start to make more sense to you.

SPEAKER_00 25:35

God, that's that's what my wife is really gonna love is me just one day being like, you know what, I'm playing pedal steel now. And she's like, what are you are you like? Did someone ask you if you wanted to like play in a band? I'd be like, no, I'm just exploring new things.

SPEAKER_02 25:48

I will say when I bought my first one, which was um it's probably been like nine years ago, I do remember saying to my wife, I was like, people might actually pay me one day to play this one. And uh and yep. Not that like she's ever cared about that, but I uh it has actually been the thing that you know I have I will actually say I've made money from playing that instrument. Um you know probably hasn't offset everything else, but what does, you know? Yeah. I was gonna say we're a debt-based economy. That's you know that's that's we have to be that's how I that I read that Hamilton book, that's what I took from it, you know.

SPEAKER_00 26:39

Yeah. Yep. Pretty accurate. Well one of my buddies down in Nashville, uh Todd Farrell, picked up pedal steel, and yeah, I'll just like see pictures of him online randomly being like, all right, here he is at this venue. What's he playing? Pedal Steel. What would he play if you could? Probably Slayer covers, which is very different than pedal steel.

SPEAKER_02 26:59

Yep. The other thing that's fun about steel that I think that I always encourage people to get into it is that like you just immediately make friends with all of the steel players because it's a very welcoming community.

SPEAKER_03 27:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 27:12

Um yeah. So I'm sure you you know plenty of them, and I think they all say the same thing. Like everybody's very approachable. It's great.

SPEAKER_00 27:23

And also they know I feel like Todd was like, or when talking about it, he was like, I know way too much about this instrument. I have no idea why I went so deep on learning about all the history of it. It can be Hawaiian sounding and like all the different uses of it is like there's actually a lot of depth to steel pedal or pedal steel guitar that I did not know existed. Oh, yeah, it's great. Yeah. But I mean, what else are you gonna do with your time? You know?

SPEAKER_01 27:45

Yeah, exactly.

SPEAKER_00 27:47

Yeah, I mean, well, just it was either what's the what's like the meme is like, do you choose like craft beer or this? And you I instead of choosing a lot of craft beer, I chose, you know, pedal steel for something.

SPEAKER_02 27:59

Yeah, I quit drinking shortly after I got a guitar. Like the steel. Uh so yeah. I I mean like I I I quit drinking for I just decided in all aspects it wasn't doing me any good. Uh, but I will say that playing pedal steel, I thought, man, I need to have my shit together to to even like approach feeling like I'm doing this justice. And I thought, definitely can't drink before these gigs. Uh you know. Yeah. And then that just kind of extended into things, and I was like, you know, I don't think I need to do that anymore. And I just stopped doing it.

SPEAKER_00 28:38

Yeah. Yeah. I I've never heard someone be like, unless they're an alcoholic, maybe, no. Um, I don't feel like anyone's like, man, I miss drinking. Anyone who gives up drinking is like, oh man, a lot of things are a lot better. Like, I'm a lot healthier in a lot of ways where I didn't realize I wasn't so healthy because I was just drinking.

SPEAKER_02 28:54

Yeah, I I I I have way fewer arguments that I've started with people that I don't know or people words than like ones that I do know. You know, it's like, um, I I've got a big enough mouth as it is, and like that didn't help any of that, you know. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 29:12

Some filters good. Some filters good for you know, not getting punched in the face and not punching someone in the face.

SPEAKER_02 29:17

I mean, I shouldn't have had the shit kicked out of me way more times than I have, you know.

SPEAKER_00 29:20

So uh sadly I relate to that sentiment of being like, while I'm saying something I'm not being like, Devin, stop it. That's a person. That's a person.

SPEAKER_02 29:27

Stop talking. Just stop talking. Nobody's interested in the intellectual point you're making. Is that's like the thing that I I had to tell myself.

SPEAKER_00 29:37

Yeah. It's like, hey, you're not building any connection or community here. You're just trying to be right about something, and that's not fun to be around. So try maybe don't be this person right now.

SPEAKER_01 29:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 29:50

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. What um how is it? I was gonna ask, like, uh, I think it's really cool to highlight dads when because I I've talked to a couple dads where like they stopped drinking because they just knew it'd be healthier for them. And I love that because like I feel like the story that I would always heard growing up was like he was an alcoholic and he almost ruined his life and need to stop drinking. And I'm like, actually, most people that I know just look up on Dan they're like, I actually just need to stop drinking because it's like I think there's better decisions for myself.

SPEAKER_02 30:18

Yeah, I I'm I think I I quit drinking 2018.

SPEAKER_03 30:24

Okay, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 30:25

So my my youngest daughter was a couple years old, and I do remember being at maybe like a 4th of July thing or something like that, that I I had had a couple of drinks, and I, you know, and I just I said something like about like stop doing that to one of them that I thought, I don't know if I would have even like said that if I was, you know, just like stone sober. And it wasn't like there was nothing really malicious about it, but I thought, I don't want to have to like I I second touch of what's in my head all the time anyway, and I thought, I don't want to have to keep, did I lose my temper because I was angry, or did I lose my temper because I was mostly drunk and I I don't know, it just seemed like there's nothing good about this for me. Um and yeah, and I I had other people around me that that had quit for you know for similar reasons. Um you know I guess you know everybody quits for their own reason, but yeah, it just seemed for you know, for me, like the thing that I'm always worried about is my my anger. And that was that was not helping that. And I thought I I gotta I gotta eliminate that part first.

SPEAKER_00 31:51

I I think if you have a substance that emboldens the characteristics of yourself that you don't like, it's pretty logical to stay away from the substance that makes you feel comfortable being a worse version of yourself. But it's that it's interesting how much time it can take you to admit like no man, alcohol makes you um alcohol makes you okay with being angry, and you're like, oh, I shouldn't be drinking.

SPEAKER_02 32:12

I know, but like you just said that and it like you just like streamlined my thoughts perfectly. And then you even said, but it's amazing how long it takes you to figure that out. Oh, dude, you know, yep. Like yeah, well, I mean that's how everything worked. It's been like not that bad. It's been like half my life at the time that I finally decided to do it, you know? Like what the hell?

SPEAKER_00 32:35

That's stupid. And I'm glad you're in a place in which you can look up and say, that was really dumb that I kept coming back to alcohol and assuming different results. And now you've been able it takes a while to be that honest with yourself, though, man. Yeah. I just yeah. Who knows? But it's uh I think really though I really mean it is like if you know something makes you a worse version of yourself, hopefully everyone has a mint the mental availability to look up and go, hey, how do I distance myself from this? How do I not put myself in a position which I'm drinking consistently because I really don't like who I am whenever like I I I am more permissible of stuff whenever I drink than I should be. So I need to so I need to stop drinking. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 33:23

I'm glad it's over.

SPEAKER_00 33:26

Also though, a hell of a lot easier said than done. Because like how do you handle now like I mean most of your gigs I'm assuming are in bars or like, you know, it works alcohol is very accessible to you, is what I would assume.

SPEAKER_02 33:36

Yeah. I would say, I mean, like just speaking as a person who has plenty of people that I think have uh I don't even know I get I I shy away from ever thinking like I was an alcoholic. Um not in the way that like you know, you go to one of those one of the secret society meetings and they're like, no, no, no, you gotta say that kind of thing. Yeah, yeah. I I I didn't have the the like my brain doesn't latch on to it the same way that I see other people do it. So like um it it's it definitely was hard to like rate the habit at first and there are there are moments where it sounds like oh that might be nice kind of thing, but but I don't know. I I don't at this point I've been doing you know, still playing out and being in places like that enough that I don't even think about that part anymore.

SPEAKER_01 34:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 34:37

Um and then like the last you know, like post-pandemic, most of the places that I've played, it's been it's it's been a nicer situation where there's a plant somewhere that might have a green room. Like and I can just go I can go be away from all those, you know, those things.

SPEAKER_00 34:58

Um hopefully. Um yeah. There's also the rise of non-alcoholic options. So like it might be like, hey, do you want like I feel like uh most bars have a ton of non-alcoholic options. They're like, hey, do you want a soda water? Do you want this? Do you want that? As opposed to like, do you want beer or liquor? Yeah. Because like I feel like 10 15 years ago, those would have been the two options in that scenario, as opposed to like maybe you want a non-alcoholic mule or something like that. Yeah, the soda water is definitely where I go. Yeah. Yeah. Oh man. I love also talking to like people about like green rooms because it's hilarious to me. Because like, I don't know if you aren't someone who's like been around music venues, but like green rooms are either non-existent, a closet, or like its own suite and beautiful and great. And I love that.

SPEAKER_02 35:45

Yeah. Uh I I don't I I kind of forgot to do it recently, but I used to do a pretty regular Instagram post where it was just a picture of myself in the green room, and it always just says green rooms are rarely green. Um yeah, a lot you you're right. Like a lot of times they're a closet or uh they're like the walk-in, you know, right before the cold part. Uh, you know, all that stuff. But yeah, it's fine, you know. Yeah. It's it's a dumb way to spend your time, but it's better than anything else I've found.

SPEAKER_00 36:20

So for like summertime with your kids, like it seems like your wife kind of like takes the lead with like planning stuff for them, making sure that they're taken care of the entire time. Does your job allow you much flexibility to like go on adventures with them during the day or be part of that? Or are you kind of like, all right, let's uh do some more guitar lessons, let's find some more gigs like for the whole summer?

SPEAKER_02 36:39

I would say uh yeah, I would say it's it's a lot of both. Like I try and keep myself as routine as possible. Um where I still have weekly lessons. Um I still pick up gigs like as you know, it it kind of depends on like I have a handful of of people that I've been playing for for the for a few years that those are kind of like if they if they offer me a tour and it's gonna work out, I'm gonna go do that. Um and then uh I've got my own things that I do and I try and keep those kind of regular. Um but then yeah, it works out pretty well, like that my schedule that I can you know, like I'm gonna take uh w last year we got both the girls uh King's Island passes. Have you ever been to King's Island? Yeah, yeah. So yeah, so like they love that, and we got them that again for their birthdays this year, and I went a couple days ago, and after we finished this, I'm taking them both and we're going for the rest of the night today. Nice. Um and during the the school year, like I'm I'm home in the mornings with my son uh nearly every day, and then like uh we're lucky that my my mom and now both my parents, now that my dad's retired, um watch have always watched the kids like in the the evening times, like when I go to work. Um but I get to be with them in the mornings and I do get to spend a ton of time with them. Um and then yeah, like the balance being that like then you know, like a couple weeks ago I was gone for the whole week and everybody kind of helps out and and it's awesome and they make that work. If you're if you're talking to lots of musicians, like it does kind of go that it'll seem like nothing's ever gonna happen ever again. And then all of a sudden, and then all the and I've stopped I've stopped worrying about that as much because then it it's like everybody asks for for something all at the same time. Um and that just seems to inevitably happen. But yeah, look, um, I just try I try all the time now to just do now is really what I strive for. So like I don't even believe in time. I really don't. I don't uh I don't think it exists. All we have is our perception of right now, even the things that are in the past, I'm just thinking of it right now. It doesn't exist outside of how I see it. I don't think about I don't worry about like the things like feel like they're going fast and uh like everything's flowing by. I try not to do that at all. It's just right now. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 39:22

Yeah. Yeah. I I think I'll have moments of like realize that I'll I'm more prone to realize the passing of time, but not pine for like a previous day. Like I'm not, I'm not a very nostalgic person. Yeah, I'm more like, oh if anything, I'm like, how lucky it is to have watched my my oldest is 10, but how lucky it is to watch her and be in her life for 10 years. Amen. Not like I can't believe she's 10. I'm just like, oh man, like she's been around for this long. I've been around for this long. I know. What a gift.

SPEAKER_02 39:48

I know, it's awesome, right? Yeah, yeah. It's so good. Like, yeah, I I think of all these things that I've seen them do, and yeah, it's just amazing.

SPEAKER_01 40:00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 40:00

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But no part of me is like, oh man, wasn't it so good? Like, I'm not nostalgic for diaper days. I'm not nostalgic for a kid missing a nap and then like being a jerk because they're overtired and won't take a nap. Like, I'm not nostalgic for that. I'm grateful I was able to do it. But yeah.

SPEAKER_02 40:16

But I I also I feel I don't like any kind of canned language when I when I'm talking to people. Like, I don't like small talk with people for the most part. But like I I I also kind of despise when people go like they ask how old you're and they're like, oh, that's a fun age. And I was and I I like to say as a canned language back at them, I always go, they've all been fun ages. Because they have. Yep. I I really can't think of a moment with any of my kids that hasn't been awesome. They're they're just so much fun. Everything about it is great. It's like the only thing I don't feel jaded about ever.

SPEAKER_00 40:53

Yep. Yep. Yeah. Yeah. No. I do. No, yeah, because it is like um, because it's I I think like one of the most fascinating responsibilities as a parent is to like know your own cynicism and your own distrust of the world, and then watch your kid enter into the world and try not to pass it on to them, but also like make them aware of what the world is actually like. Yeah. It's like an exhausting balance. Because like I want my teen year old to understand the world, but not fully, because the world is real effed up. So, like, how do I do that? But also get to see them like see stuff with a positive, trusting light that I don't have as much anymore.

SPEAKER_02 41:28

Uh yeah, yeah. Yeah, I was telling I think I was telling my oldest daughter something to the effect of like the things that I saw my parents do that I see in myself, and then things that I do to like try and correct some of those things that I don't want to like fall completely into. Yep. And you know, no slight on my parents uh for whatever. It was just like things that it's like I don't want to fall into that habit the same way that I think that they have. And I and I was telling her, and I was like, You're gonna have the same thing, you're gonna have something that you're like, oh, dad did that and that's super annoying. And now I see myself. And I was like, and it'll happen, it'll it's fine. It's just what you know, it's familiar. Uh yeah. And you yeah, you get the choice of how far you want to let yourself lead into it. Hopefully.

SPEAKER_00 42:17

Yep, yeah. Pretty much, yeah. Nope. And it's like, yeah, it gives you your it's an opportunity also to give yourself some grace, give your parents some grace, maybe, and be like, oh, cool. If I want to be this person, then don't change anything. But if you don't want to be this person, how do you break the habit? Yeah. And hopefully you get the energy to do it. Yeah. For sure. Yeah. I I feel like I, in relation to also like the what is time, does time really exist? It's like, all right, so if I'm about to enter into this space, what energy do I have? Is like another thing. Is like, do I have the energy to approach this the way I think I could or should? Sometimes, yeah, sometimes now I'm pretty tired. So uh I'm going I know this version of me is going to give less than I feel like I'm capable of. So uh just acknowledge that to yourself at least, and maybe someone else if you feel like they're that you can trust them with that also. Yeah, I mean, I'm tired all the time, so I'm always giving less.

SPEAKER_02 43:07

So uh I don't wake up feeling refreshed.

SPEAKER_00 43:11

Uh do some people that's another do some people wake up and they're like, let's go, dude. And then I'm like, I'm sorry, what I know.

SPEAKER_02 43:18

I've never felt like that. Like, doesn't nothing nothing to do with kids. Like, I just do not feel like I wake up uh like I don't know how I got through school because I don't know how I was up that early as a child. Like I can get up earlier now and I'm just fine with being tired because nobody's rushing me. But like to get up and then they're gonna go ask me to perform mental tasks. It's like, what the like how the hell did I do any of that?

SPEAKER_00 43:46

My my wife is always like, I feel like you wake up at like 8 p.m. Like I've I've been awake since six, but like around seven or eight p.m. I'm like, all right, what are we doing? And she's like, We've just I've just we've been going for like 12 hours. I'm ready for bed, and you're like ready to like this go to a concert. I'm like, yeah. I also wish my rhythms were different, but this is who I am. So here we go. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 44:05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 44:06

Yeah. I feel you, buddy. But yeah, waking up refreshed and ready to go for the day, that's I feel like more the like, oh, I got stuff to do was what wakes me up. Not like my body is naturally rested and goes like, oh man, these kids gotta get out the door by seven. Okay, I gotta, okay, I got I can't sit here. I gotta get up. I gotta do stuff. Yeah. Yeah, I know what you mean. Yeah. Necessity. Necessity. Yeah. How we end every episode is I ask every guest a series of five questions. They're all like pretty casual, um, and you have time to think about them. Okay. Um, they're in rapid fire. The first question is did you have any backup names for your kids? Like, did you have anything that you almost named your child?

SPEAKER_02 44:45

We had other things that I know I pitched that I thought were great that my wife wasn't as into. But I feel like we came to a pretty uh um pretty good, you know, understanding. And they all have meaning to me, like outside of uh outside of like whatever they might just appear on the surface, then I don't know if yeah. Um I don't think my wife cared about uh that Hazel's name is Hazel Alice, like Hazel Dickens and Alice Gerard. Like I don't think that part mattered to her. She just liked how they sounded together, and that really is all that it mattered. Um yeah.

SPEAKER_00 45:22

She's a school tea if she's a school teacher also, though, you've got a big mountain to climb up kids.

SPEAKER_02 45:27

Yeah. Yeah, she has specific names that she was like, no, no, no, that one's not good. Um, but I I think like in general, I like hard consonants most of the time, and I like things that, you know, I I guess you would call them like old timey uh like I thought Walter would have been a really good name for one of my sons, but you know, I was not I was not uh not in a friendly room for Walters.

SPEAKER_00 45:55

I think if you name a kid Walter, you have to figure out how to age them to be like 60 or 70 automatically. Because you know, like I've never met a ten milder Walters.

SPEAKER_02 46:03

I am very prepared to do that. Uh I because I just talk to everybody exactly the same way. Like from the moment they get here. I don't I don't really know any other way to do it. And I am in my head, I'm like a 73-year-old man and have been from you know. Yeah uh yeah, I try I I think I try to embody the like my one grandpa that lived that I, you know, that I knew him, he would just he he smoked constantly and he would just sit and tell us stories, and he was he loved just sitting and talking. And yeah uh I I try have tried to have that energy.

SPEAKER_01 46:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 46:41

And he would just say, like when we were kids, we'd be out out to dinner with him, and he'd go, Trev, you want to go smoke with me? And that just meant that just meant you were gonna walk outside the Bob Evans and he was gonna smoke and he was gonna talk to you. And that was a I I I still think of that very fun.

SPEAKER_01 46:56

That's awesome.

SPEAKER_02 46:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 46:57

That's so you're just waiting for your body to catch up with like your mentality of being a seven-year-old man.

SPEAKER_02 47:04

You know, I don't know. He I mean, he lived till he was like eighty-six, uh 87, 88, something like that. And in the last few years, I remember going over to his house for something uh that he was just standing in his doorway. He looked all frail, as can be, you know, he had shrunk. And I don't remember what he was joking around with me, but he he kind of like dropped back onto his onto his legs and threw like a combination of punches. Like this is a guy that'd been in the Navy. Yeah, he did that, and I was like, if he had hit me, that shit would have hurt. You know, and like when he jumped, I was afraid for him, like he was gonna fall down, and he hit great bounds. So like I, you know, maybe I'm in as good a shape as he ever was. I don't know. Now maybe I'm just already on the down downside. I don't know. Yeah, you don't know until you're there.

SPEAKER_00 48:01

You don't. That's cool. Um, next question is who's like your favorite TV or movie dad? Or what comes to mind?

SPEAKER_02 48:11

Um I think the one that comes to mind is probably Uncle Phil. Yeah. Yeah. Um Yeah. Oh man, he's a good well, I mean he was a lawyer, which is a little quite my thing. But you know, like he's he's uh when you find out more about Uncle Phil, you find out he was kind of coming from a radical place and he was trying to it was like he was trying to take down the system from the inside. I can get down with that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And he, you know, yeah. He's he's loud, but he's he's well intentioned. He's taking in his his nephew. Yeah, I'm going with Uncle Phil. Yeah, very happy with that answer.

SPEAKER_00 48:51

It's a it's it's a consistent answer to the point where like Yeah, it is. It is. No, you're good. Okay. I think like Fresh Prince of Bel Air is like one of those shows I remember watching like the reruns of as a kid, but never watching it like in real time. You know, I feel like whenever you're a kid, there's just like always episodes of like Seinfeld or The Simpsons on, and I had no idea why. Yeah. Um so I'm like, I don't know what the st I need I want almost one need to like go back and watch Fresh Prince of Bel Air so I can actually watch the Uncle Phil's like character arc because like I just think of him as like being in the background and that's about it.

SPEAKER_02 49:28

Yeah, um I I don't remember if I was watching I feel like I was watching that as it was going on, but I'm not sure. Okay. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 49:36

That's another great thing with time is to be like, yeah, I've no, I just the Simpsons are a big part of my childhood. I can't tell you what seasons, I can't tell you what years. I can just tell you random quotes from episodes that make no sense out of context. Yeah. Yeah. Yep. Um, next question. You might not have one. Do you have a replacement curse word? Or do you just say the curse word? Uh oh, you've been like in front of my kids? Yeah, in front of your kids, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Like step yourself, something like that.

SPEAKER_02 50:03

A few years ago, and I know this because I was like loading out of a show that I had played, and my wife texted me that they had been at some sort of family function, and that my daughters had been telling like all of my aunts that, oh yeah, dad curses all the time, you know, like and uh and she's and I and I remember thinking like, well, that's no, you know, not that I I cared, but I was like, I don't want that to be the thing they tell everybody about me. That's your legacy, yeah. And I was like, I'm gonna show them and I'll just never swear in front of them ever again. And so I didn't for like four or five years. And now I don't I I would say in general, I don't curse in front of them, but I also I I think they're old enough now that like I'm not worried about it. Yeah. Uh it's like the same thing I tell them with a joke. Me it like they said, like the only rule with a joke is that it has to be funny.

SPEAKER_01 51:03

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_02 51:04

And and I I I mean that like in the same way that like if they're saying something like that, I was like, you gotta know the room, and if it's not gonna land, you're gonna look yeah, don't say it. Um and so yeah, I I think I just say I've I've been trying not to to curse in front of the boy because he's young and uh he will repeat stuff that I'm not you know I'm trying not to do that. I don't think I have a replacement word, I just don't I just you know, I just grunt.

SPEAKER_00 51:41

Right, yeah, sound effects. I I think sound effects is more what I'm prone to do.

SPEAKER_02 51:44

Yeah. Yeah. I had uh it's kind of along these lines, but it wasn't my fault necessarily. But when um when my younger daughter, she had uh trigger thumbs.

SPEAKER_03 51:56

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 51:57

You know, when she was real little, and we had to go get those, it was like a real quick operation, but I had to take her for uh a preliminary visit, and it was around Thanksgiving, and I know that because the night before she had come downstairs and she was probably like three. And uh and I had planes, trains, and automobiles on. And I oh god. And I thought she was asleep and not even paying attention, sitting next to me in the chair, and it was during the whole scene where it was like, you know, they don't you didn't have the fucking car in the fucking room. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Where he says the efforts over and over. And I'm I just thought she was asleep. And so then the next day I drive her to this appointment, and she's sitting in the back of my van that I had at the time, just like like this tiny little kid in the back of my van. And she was like singing to herself, fucking, fucking, fuck. And I was like, What are you saying, L? And she just and and so she's singing that, and then I realized that and I was like, well, she just she just heard the word, she doesn't even know what it means. But then somebody cut me off on the drive home, and I went, whoa! I just went, whoa, that's all I said, and she said, What will you say, whoa? And I was like, this guy cut me off, and she went, This fucking guy. That's awesome. How old was she? Like three, four, something, you know, tough.

SPEAKER_00 53:27

And I was like, wow.

SPEAKER_01 53:29

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 53:30

Yeah. Yeah. We watched, um, we were watching through the bear, and our like four-year-old son and come into the room and we thought he had fallen asleep. And we watched the episode of like uh The Dinner of the Seven Fishes, which is like this massive Italian like dinner, and they get into a huge fight. There's a moment where Bob Odinkirk is like trying to get someone to punch him. He's like, You fucking pussy, you won't do it, you fucking pussy, you fucking pussy. And my son just starts going, You fucking pussy, and we're like, no, no, no, that's not you can't do that. There is no scenario in which my four-year-old saying, You fucking pussy is a scenario. It's not gonna work out well for you. Yeah. It no, it's not, but it's now a good story to tell. But in the moment I was like, how do we negatively reinforce this to never say this phrase again? Because this does not turn out well for anyone if you say this in a different context. Yeah. Um, next question. What's like one of your favorite like activities or toys that you play with your kids?

SPEAKER_02 54:26

Um well, um I do like any time that they want to go like hit wiffle ball. Um just because I love baseball. Um but in general, I would say just like I like I like being outside when they're riding their bikes. I just I remember like riding my bike when I was a kid and loving that. Um and then maybe selfishly, but my son definitely loves playing the drums. And so uh and I I've play oh like I'll play music with my daughters too, but and I I've told people like they they definitely like it, but he seems like it might ruin his life, you know? Yeah, yeah, I got that. Um and so I I like playing playing music with them whenever they want to do that. But uh Yeah, I mean the both of them are the my daughters are real like they like painting and making crafts and stuff like that, and like they'll wrote me into doing that because I don't I don't ever like gravitate towards it, but I I've enjoyed doing that with them.

SPEAKER_01 55:35

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 55:35

Yeah. If they want to hang out with me, I'm pretty psyched about it. It's cool. Doesn't matter.

SPEAKER_00 55:41

Oh, this is great. This is great. Yeah, what you want? Are we getting ice cream? Are we just hanging out? Are we walking around the neighborhood?

SPEAKER_02 55:45

This is also just taking a walk is my favorite.

SPEAKER_00 55:48

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But also taste takes the most energy to convince them to do, I feel like. Sometimes I like going swimming with everybody, like we really like doing that too.

SPEAKER_01 55:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 55:58

Yeah. But never in the Ohio. That's the oh no, absolutely not.

SPEAKER_00 56:03

Can't do that. God no. God no. Um, and then last question for you what is your least favorite kid's show or movie? Like show that your kids used to watch or do watch, whereas like I cannot stand this show.

SPEAKER_02 56:20

Uh I don't even know if I have an answer to that because I'm I'm pretty good at ignoring things when I want to. Um that's impressive. That's impressive. Um yeah, I don't know. I I think like I just block out the ones e even a lot of the things that they're enjoying, like I I can I can do something else and just you know sit and read while they're watching it. Okay, yeah. Cool.

SPEAKER_00 56:50

Then I'll ask you a backup question. Um what's like a moment is there like any moment of your kid's life you're most excited to be a part of or see them enter into? Like, is there any phase of like, oh man, I can't wait till my daughters do this or my son does this or anything like that?

SPEAKER_02 57:05

No, just uh again, it's like comes back to the like right now is it. Yeah. Yeah. Um because that's yeah, I really do that like that's all we have. So um and I would I would say that kind of comes back to especially with with our our firstborn to like you don't know what's gonna happen, and that's just how everybody's life is, you know? So some people's lives are longer than others, and yeah, that's just how it is. So yeah, uh I'm just uh the furthest I'll look ahead is you know, like a practical amount, like a week or so. Like I, you know, just to be like planned enough that uh that'll be fun. But yeah, yeah, so I'm looking forward. We're gonna go ride some roller coasters today. That's gonna be a good time.

SPEAKER_00 57:51

That's awesome. I so I never went to Kings Island because Evansville was pretty was that a bit of a driver, I think, to say.

SPEAKER_02 57:57

Yeah, that's a little bit of a drive.

SPEAKER_00 57:59

Yeah. So Holiday World is where we went a lot. Where is that one at? Uh Santa Claus, Indiana. So it's like central of Indiana, and it had like all these wooden roller coasters and stuff.

SPEAKER_02 58:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 58:13

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 58:14

Santa Claus, Indiana. I know that. Santa Claus, Indiana.

SPEAKER_00 58:17

Yep. Yeah. Home of Jay Cutler, maybe?

SPEAKER_02 58:20

Oh, I didn't know that. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 58:23

No, as if you need to, you know, like you're gonna have at a trivia one time and be like, what kind of above average NFL quarterback is from Santa Claus, Indiana?

SPEAKER_01 58:33

Yeah.

unknown 58:33

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 58:34

Oh, Jay Cutler. Yeah. Oh yeah. Yeah. And then um, last thing have for you is just like moment for self-promotion. So I don't know if you have like if you're going on tour, playing any shows or anything like that, Instagram, anything like that if you if that was uh something you wanted to do.

SPEAKER_02 58:48

Uh well I do have a record that um we uh so uh on Instagram I'm under Mavis guitar, and that's what I call all my kind of so like solo recordings. Um and we put out a record, it's me and my brother and my friend Nick, it's uh called Petal Steel Trio. Nice. And um we did like a release show, but I mean, you know, I uh I'm in other bands that uh tour more frequently, and like most of the Mavis stuff just happens around here. So like we've had some residencies in the past years and stuff like that, but we've got uh we are playing a benefit show next month for a thing called Sofa Gives, which is a local nonprofit that's all for um uh uh musicians' healthcare expenses is what they raise money for. So yeah, like if people can check that out, like you can donate to that anytime, Sofa Gives. Okay, cool. Um and uh and yeah, and like you can listen to the record on Bandcamp or anywhere you can stream it.

SPEAKER_00 59:55

Nice. Awesome. Well, that's pretty much all I've got for you, and try not to keep you from going running some roller coasters with your daughters. But I appreciate your time, buddy. Yeah, man. For the most part, yeah, man. Thanks for taking some time to hang out with me and talk about life. Yeah, this was fun. Perfect. Thanks, Travis. Enjoy the rest of your day. You too. Thank you so much for listening to the episode. Make sure to follow us on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube at the Imperfect Dads Podcast. And make sure to give us five stars for every listen to us. Music, editing, and production is all done by me. Make sure to tune in on Mondays and most Thursdays for an episode. This podcast is part of the Never at Faith Network. Make sure to go to Never at FaithNetwork.com to learn more about it.