The Leader Learner Podcast

S01E04 The Not Giving Advice Episode

March 07, 2022 Theresa Destrebecq & Vincent Musolino Season 1 Episode 4
The Leader Learner Podcast
S01E04 The Not Giving Advice Episode
Show Notes

Check in Question:

  • Do you believe criminals can be truly rehabilitated in prison? 

Big Ideas:

  • “You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.”
  • Fear of people who are different than us
  • The costs of the advice trap that leads to dysfunction in teams
  • Advice is personal and the transfer of it doesn’t alway flourish in another context, or with another person
  • Best practices shift based on context, and means that there is only one.
  • We don’t live in a linear world, so there can’t be a best. 
  • Advice creates demotivated advice receivers and overwhelmed advice givers
  • Advice creates a short term solace
  • Advice is everywhere and we all seem to like giving it out
  • Is sharing of information giving advice? 
  • Sometimes the expertise and advice is wrong for you
  • The power of the scientific process (randomized trials)
  • Selling your idea as “THE” idea
  • Is the problem the assumption behind the advice and not the advice itself?
  • The importance of drawing out the ideas of all people, and being attuned to why they aren’t sharing their ideas
  • The person who talks the most often has the “power” in a situation.
  • Are we willing to share our voice and have power dynamics shift as a result?
  • How to hold power? Being worthy of power.
  • Power with people versus power over others
  • When we interact with people who want our advice and expect to receive it
  • The people who want to be told what to do, and the people who love to tell others what to do
  • What about the cultures where giving advice is a natural part of life because it is a passing along of knowledge? 
  • What’s the middle way?
  • Is advice giving a way to exert power over others
  • The intention behind the advice giving has many nuances
  • The dynamics of the relationship matters when it comes to advice giving/receiving


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