The Leader Learner Podcast
The Leader Learner podcast is for readers and leaders of all kinds.
Rather than talk to authors about the professional development books that they have written, the Leader Learner podcast spotlights readers and delves into their process the book(s) that have had an impact on them and their work.
This podcast is brought to you by Theresa Destrebecq, founder of Emerge Book Circles.
Join me as I discuss books, learning, and leadership with the guests.
Read Deeper Not Faster.
The Leader Learner Podcast
S02E03 The Explain Not Persuade Episode
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Theresa Destrebecq & Vincent Musolino
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Season 2
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Episode 3
Check-In Question:
- If you were a vegetable, what vegetable would you be?
Big Ideas:
- Theresa's BIG Reflection Question: How can I have an opinion or take a stand on something, without other people taking in personally, or feeling judged.
- "Strong back soft front." ~Joan Halifax
- Is taking a stand the same as having an opinion?
- How can you care about someone and want to persuade them that you are right?
- Can you take a stand without persecuting someone?
- Values as our stand
- Conversations don't always have to be confrontations
- Be open to NOT wanting to change people's minds
- Persuasion is different than explanation
- "For most of us the opposite of speaking isn't listening, it's waiting" ~Daniel Pink
- Asking people for their sources puts them on the defensive
- Logos (what we say), Ethos (character of person), Pathos (affect we are creating in others)
- How convincing others doesn't work and often doesn't bear fruit
- Judging activities and not people
- Difference between judgment (good/bad) and discernment (like/don't like)
- The importance of the words we use
- Swap good/bad for useful/not useful to be less judgmental
- The lens we see things through
- Divide between consequentialists (duty pound) and utilitarians (principle bound)
- We need to take a stand for things to change
- How relationships shift whether we need to take a stand
- Constructive and destructive anger - fighting to be right, or for what is right
- You can't be fierce in a vacuum
- Our stand doesn't have to be other's stands
- Is making a decision taking a stand?
- Can our world exist without people taking a stand?
- Not just what we do, but the environment, timing, and people matters
- How/where does authority and power come into play
- Dissention among individual contributors doesn't necessarily create change
- Taking a stand when your manager gives you another project
- Not just what you say, but how you say it matters
Resources Mentioned:
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