S02E03 The Explain Not Persuade Episode

Check-In Question:

• If you were a vegetable, what vegetable would you be?

Big Ideas:

• Theresa's BIG Reflection Question: How can I have an opinion or take a stand on something, without other people taking in personally, or feeling judged.
• "Strong back soft front." ~Joan Halifax
• Is taking a stand the same as having an opinion?
• How can you care about someone and want to persuade them that you are right?
• Can you take a stand without persecuting someone?
• Values as our stand
• Conversations don't always have to be confrontations
• Be open to NOT wanting to change people's minds
• Persuasion is different than explanation
• "For most of us the opposite of speaking isn't listening, it's waiting" ~Daniel Pink
• Asking people for their sources puts them on the defensive
• Logos (what we say), Ethos (character of person), Pathos (affect we are creating in others)
• How convincing others doesn't work and often doesn't bear fruit
• Judging activities and not people
• Difference between judgment (good/bad) and discernment (like/don't like) 
• The importance of the words we use
• Swap good/bad for useful/not useful to be less judgmental
• The lens we see things through
• Divide between consequentialists (duty pound) and utilitarians (principle bound)
• We need to take a stand for things to change
• How relationships shift whether we need to take a stand
• Constructive and destructive anger - fighting to be right, or for what is right
• You can't be fierce in a vacuum
• Our stand doesn't have to be other's stands
• Is making a decision taking a stand?
• Can our world exist without people taking a stand?
• Not just what we do, but the environment, timing, and people matters
• How/where does authority and power come into play
• Dissention among individual contributors doesn't necessarily create change
• Taking a stand when your manager gives you another project
• Not just what you say, but how you say it matters

Resources Mentioned:

• Joan Halifax
• Daniel Pink
• "Fierce Self-Compassion" by Kristin Neff
• Sinking of El Faro 

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