Two Dozy Broads Podcast
Two Dozy Broads Podcast
Gold Teeth & Toenails
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This month, Two Dozy Broads are back to telling family stories
& giving you a few suggestions for making your Holidays more pleasant.
Hello, hello. Hello. Hello. And a happy start to this holiday season. Ho ho to everyone. And welcome to another Two Dozy Broads Rambling. Also known by some as a podcast. We hope everybody enjoyed the full uh we did the full opening music. We did it as closing music last month, the full three minutes. We hope people enjoyed that. Yes. So uh if you are interested of what the whole music sounds like, go back and listen. Yes. The Don is wishing I wasn't cooking so many holiday meals because all the producer wants is a huge pot of grandma's dressing to himself. Yes. And I have to make the industrial batch this year. Uh we're not sure what Gary would like this holiday season, but at the moment he's waiting by the front door for a FedEx package.
SPEAKER_01That's it. That's what he wants.
SPEAKER_00Uh but we do know that Blaze would like a festive bowl behind her ear for her next grooming appointment.
SPEAKER_01She is she is so lovely. I am Sandy from Gemological Esoterica. And I am Linda Strochane from the Mercury Academy, and we are two Dozy Broads. Well, the holiday season is here. Oh yes. Boy, it just landed like a load of hay, didn't it? Yeah. At least according to some. Uh and and we Dozy Broads have decided to uh regale you with silly family stories.
SPEAKER_00Yes, after last month, which was rather serious.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, we can't do that for very long. No. So we have a few uh a few bits of information also on how to survive the holidays. So here in the States, those holidays would be Thanksgiving through New Year's Day. Since we were both very young children, we both heard the story of how our great-grandfather died of gangrene after badly cutting his toenails and refusing to let anybody deal with the matter. This is one of the silly stories, this is our idea of a silly story.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. And we we both we both heard this.
SPEAKER_01Oh, we heard it from the time we were very young.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, and the funny part about it is that the last time I heard it, and you'll go on a little bit about how your father would tell the story. Yeah, but my mother in later years, she was in her 80s and she couldn't cut her own toenails anymore. And so she would say to me, San, take and take and cut my toenails for me, after having told me the story. And I would look at her and go, I'm not cutting your toenails. What if I cut them? And the one time she talked me into it, I cut one too short. And it wasn't that it was bleeding or anything, but she's like, It's too short. I'm gonna get gangrene like my grandfather. And it was like, All right, from now on, you go to professional. And at the time, she and Aunt Uni Brow would go together, and it was 15 bucks, however, it was once every cup, whatever it was. And they would each get their tone, they would have toenail appointments through the doctor. They would that's and they would just go in and there was a special nurse. Can you imagine this poor nurse? This is all she ever did was got toenails.
SPEAKER_01You wonder what her view of the world was. Yeah. It had to be annoying. Karma. What was the poor woman's karma? What was what was your how did your father tell these stories? Oh, yeah. And he he he as we got a little older, and a little older is like once I was say five or six, uh, he'd he'd like to tell it when he was cutting his own toenails. Oh, okay. Yeah. And and uh he'd tell it, and he'd tell it with great relish, and as he'd tell it, uh his grandpa's leg got greener. Oh god. And the gangrene got stinkier. But uh the moral of the story was uh don't be don't be too stubborn to to get help. Yes. And uh then my father went on to be equally as stubborn in his own way. So they loved telling the story, but they didn't exactly get the point of it. But that was that was a story that went on forever.
SPEAKER_00Oh, yeah, for the whole time. And the really weird thing is that my father, one of the reasons he died was gangrene of the toe. Oh, yes. And so I do know what it smells like. And he had seen like three or four doctors, and they had never diagnosed it as such.
SPEAKER_01Probably never saw it before.
SPEAKER_00I don't know, but that was the weird thing, is that that was one of the two big things that my father ended up dying of.
SPEAKER_01Now that is just seriously weird.
SPEAKER_00Yes.
SPEAKER_01So next we have the story. Yeah, we have the story about the gold teeth. Yes. Yeah, well the the the version I was told is so much more interesting than the true story. But uh it's before I got the ring, uh our Aunt Unibro gave each of the nieces at the who were at that time.
SPEAKER_00Who didn't have a who didn't have a mother who had a ring.
SPEAKER_01Yes. Gave us each uh uh a ring that had belonged to great-grandma. Yes, our great-grandma. And I got an emerald gold setting. And um and it was never none of them were ever marked with the carrotage. No, no the caratage. There was no markage. But I was told be before I even got this thing, that what had happened was all of my my grandmother's, my father's mother, all of her godfathers, and she had four, had take had taken out a gold tooth and had it melt. No, this is the story. No, but I know the real story, which I'll tell. Oh God. And and melted it down, and they they had it made into this ring and had this emerald set in it. I had to, I had, I have to be one of the most gullible cynics in the entire history of life. Because my father told me this for years, even before I got the ring. So when I got it, I was so excited because I had this tooth gold ring, and and I thought that was just the neatest thing. But that was the story I was told. And and and and he told it with a straight face and with all of the trappings. And because the f the older members of the family, uh, my father's parents and and everybody else knew the real story, but they all were weird. Yeah. I could look at them and figure that they do something that's screwy.
SPEAKER_00But the real story was the real story. Well, and and all the girls, all the girls, my mother and her sisters all knew the real story. And the real story was our great-grandmother, actually, probably would have been our great-great-grandmother. Yes, she dated a jeweler around 1900, 1910. And he gave her much jewelry. And they dated for a few years, and on, you know, the anniversaries and birthdays and stuff, he would either give her a ring or a pendant or whatever it was. And so what ended up happening was she never ended up marrying him. My mother's story was she dated him to get as much as she could out of him and she dumped him. That was the way my mother told the story. Her great-grandmother was a gold digger. Yes, that was the story.
SPEAKER_01My that was the story my mother told him.
SPEAKER_00Yes. So what ended up happening is there was a lot of jewelry. I ended up with a turquoise turquoise ring, and it was dated, it did have carriage on it. Uh-huh. And I ended up with a sapphire and pearl pendant, uh-huh uh, which both of these I've passed off into the family as I have no children. Yeah. Uh Shirley got the emerald ring, that's where the emerald ring came from.
SPEAKER_01That's where that came from.
SPEAKER_00And uh uh the better daughter ended up with the ruby ring eventually. There was a ruby also. Okay. And there was also some miscellaneous jewelry, but that's where it came from. But there were gold teeth. And what happened is when Auntie Uni Brow was leaving her apartment for the nursing home, she gave me a box. Now there will be a story if anybody asks, but you're gonna have to actually ask me for the story. Uh-huh. The family Bible was in that one. And boy, that's a story. But there was a sucrets box. For any for any of you that grew up in the United States, Sucrets was a sore throat lozenge, and it came in a little tin. Yes. And maybe, you know, I don't know, whatever. It wasn't that big, but you opened it up and there were lozenges. But so I I go and I find this family bible, and I find this and I find that. And I opened this thing up and it's filled with gold teeth. Now, when I mean filled, I mean three or four. Well, that's a lot, though. And it was heavy, right? And so apparently somebody in the family, or or we had a mass murder, I don't know, had their teeth pulled and kept the teeth. Maybe they were gonna make a ring out of it and everything. Well, you never know. But that's what happened. So there were gold teeth somewhere, I think, probably, I don't even know where I I haven't seen them in actually I do know where they are. I just remembered. I know where the gold teeth are.
SPEAKER_01Oh, how wonderful.
SPEAKER_00I don't think I'm gonna pass that on to anyone ever. I think those may get get maybe cashed in eventually. But there are three or four really heavy gold teeth. And but but they were never made into rings.
SPEAKER_01It was our great-great-grandmother that that anyway, that was our great-grandmother, the gold digger. Well, that explains how I got the uh the the the pendant watch, yeah. And all of that. So that was all of it. We have we have our our great-grandmother's ill-gotten game.
SPEAKER_00Yes, but and as I say, I have passed all of it on to cousins who have children and grandchildren. So that's that part's all gone. That's all good. So anyway, so now you uh I let's see, where are we up to?
SPEAKER_01I think I think we're up to uh we're up to something something for the holidays to save you at the holidays.
SPEAKER_00Yes, you have some you have some some uh bits of bits of good information. Let's hope so. Well, you got some information. All right, I have.
SPEAKER_01Whether they're good is is up to the receiver. First of all, you take cinnamon. Now in this case, cinnamon stick. So it's gonna be herbs you're talking about. This is herbs we're talking about. Okay. You take cinnamon because it's a masculine uh masculine herb, it's the sun. It's also protection, love, and lust. And in e in ancient times, very ancient times, cinnamon oil was what they used in Egyptian mummification. Right. So you you know, you've got that link. But you take a little hunk of cinnamon stick, or a whole one, but at least a hunk. Then you take a few cloves. Now, cloves will drive away the hostile and the negative, which is really good at keeping And it makes a ham taste good too. Yeah, but it's good at at keeping certain relatives away, you know. The living ones or the dead ones? All of the above. Oh, okay. Okay. And it's also masculine, and it's Jupiter, so it expands in its space because Jupiter is expansive. Now, clove deals with protection. It's also good for exorcism if you which is another thing you do with the holidays anyway. Uh, that's a family holiday for you. Exorcism at the faculty.
SPEAKER_00You're gonna have to request that one too.
SPEAKER_01Uh yeah, and then peppermint. Now, in this case, I advocate n you you can use the herb if you want. This is not oil. You see, it is like a little a little hunk of peppermint stick or a little uh candy cane, a tiny one or something. Oh, so not just okay. Yeah, but you've got the pep peppermint in there. Okay. So that's masculine, it's mercury. That's purification, love, and healing, the cleansing of evil. Now, you take a lemon, a whole lemon, a little well, lemons aren't that big anyway. Lemons are purification and friendship. And they're a feminine. So this gives you the feminine. You take the little lemon and you take at least three little cloves and you push those suckers in in something you consider a creative way. Okay. Then you get yourself some kind of way to tie or affix uh the little hunk of cinnamon and the peppermints. A ribbon. A ribbon, a little piece of tr of twine, you know. Pipe cleaners. Pipe cleaners, anything, anything like that. You and you tie those things on there. You put them on your holiday table. You got you know, and that will help to purify the energies at the table. That whole combination. And that's why I didn't have it with uh oil or anything else. Yes, because it's a f it's a table decoration. It's a table decoration with a purpose. All right. And if you make if you've got a big table, you know, maybe have You could have a couple of them. You could have three little centerpieces and you could shove one of these in there. What do you do when they're done? When they're done, well, you can like with a sensor in in in church, you could throw them around the room, you know, kind of move them around the room to clean the room afterward. Kind of like how you how they they used to go around with that little ashtray that would suck up the smoke. Yeah. You go around and you cleanse the room and then you say thank you and throw it away. Okay. Because at the end of a holiday gathering, these things are gonna be wilting fast. Because they do a lot of work in a short space of time. Okay, okay, so they can just be thrown out. So that that that little do-it-yourself is my contribution to the holiday thing.
SPEAKER_00And I have a couple of stones that people might find useful to navigate the holiday terror. Uh, I talk about pyrite every year, so I'm not gonna talk about it this year. I have two other ones. I have black tourmaline, which absorbs a lot of negative energy. And when I mean a lot, this stuff is like the energizer bunny of absorbing energy. Sure need that. It also grounds you, which is which is nice, and it would ground everybody in the room slightly at least. We're in the we you have to remember that uh Mercury retrograde is starting around here too, so it's gonna be one weird holiday season.
SPEAKER_01It is. Mercury doesn't go direct until basically 15th, 18th of January. Yeah. It's retrograde and sag. So it's going everybody's going to be making everything because it's Sag. Yeah. And it's Jupiter. Everything is going to be bigger than it seems. It's either going to be bigger better or bigger worser.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Probably bigger worse.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, there you go. So if you are the hosting whatever holiday terror, I if you have, I would put one by the front door, and I would also put one by the dining room table to absorb the the weird, strange energies that come in. Oh god, yeah, what a good idea. And if you can get some size to them, it's even better. I mean, you know, a little a little 25 millimeter one-inch piece isn't going to do much, but you know, if you can get a couple or you know, get a bag of it hanging under the table or you know, put it up instead of mistletoe.
SPEAKER_01If you have if you have your your holiday center pieces, you can tuck it in. Including your lemon there, tuck it in. You can tuck it in with there, and that'll that'll really energize.
SPEAKER_00Yes, it'll really absorb mega.
SPEAKER_01It could save a call to uh the authorities trying to.
SPEAKER_00I wouldn't count on that, but but if nothing else, you can always throw it at somebody. The other one I have is Bloodstone. Uh this one is good for digestive issues. And if you've ever overindulged in food or drink or cookies or pie or whatever, and a lot of fights start over food. Oh, they do. And a lot of fights start after the meal when everybody is just full and cranky and they all want a nap, but you're at somebody's house, you can't take a nap, and every some want to watch the football game, and some want to do this, and some want to do that. Bloodstone is really good to bolster the digestion so you can digest that food comfortably and easily.
SPEAKER_01So it might make it easier when all of the all of the holiday memories of years and years come back and people are either crying or growling or something. And then somebody brings out the cookies and you know that Well, this is Minnesota, and in Minnesota, after you've fed people, you have to feed them again. Oh yeah. Because you can't send them out on the road with only an eight-course meal inside of them. There has to be a little lunch, there has to be a little supper, there has to be a little snack. Have a little snack. I'm putting now I'm going to put out the herring and the cookies and all of these stuff.
SPEAKER_00And none of it, none of it goes together. But anyway. So try Bloodstone. Try Black Termin and try Bloodstone.
SPEAKER_01Oh, that would be great. So that is just about it for this podcast. Now, whether it was topped with a festive bow or not, it's completely up to you, our dear listeners. And a very happy holiday season to each of you and all of you. And I am Linda Strochane of the Mercury Academy. And I am Sandy from Gemological Esoterica. And we are two dozy broads. Ho ho. Ho ho.