S5 Ep13 Falcon Crest: Fair Game - The " Fictionally Factual" Episode

Christopher shows up at Falcon Crest in a suit and no collar, and that one wardrobe choice tells you everything. He’s on a leave of absence from the priesthood, Angela is scandalized, and Lance immediately feels the ground shift under his feet. We break down how “Fair Game” turns Christopher’s faith crisis into a full-on power struggle over family identity, loyalty, and who gets to be the future heir of Falcon Crest. Across Tuscany Valley, the other plotlines hit just as hard. Maggie’s book and her amnesia keep fueling that “mystery man” tension with Chase, while lawyers start sniffing around what’s true, what’s fiction, and what can be weaponized in court. We also follow Jordan as she draws calm, unshakeable boundaries with the Manimal, and we clock the growing suspicion that her conflict with her father runs deeper than a simple professional grudge. Then Terry storms in wearing evening gowns like armor and drops a marriage ultimatum on Richard Channing, who responds with his usual brand of panic, arrogance, and strategy. We talk through Richard’s next move, Angela’s surprisingly sharp paper-trail investigation into Peter’s business affairs, Lance and Apollonia’s tour fight, and why Robin hovering around that baby feels like a storm warning for what’s coming next. If you love Falcon Crest recaps, primetime soap opera drama, and character-driven breakdowns of Angela Channing, Richard Channing, Maggie and Chase Gioberti, Melissa, Lance, and Christopher, hit play now. Subscribe, share the episode with a fellow soap fan, and leave a review with your hottest theory about who’s lying and what Terry really wants.

Transcript

Welcome Back To Soap Lore

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Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, welcome and welcome back to another fun filled edition of Soapbour. I'm your host, Jeff Silvio and review on the Sophia study at the five time storylines of 1986. It is a Falcon Crest common day. So go ahead and fell away. Whether you're new to this or tournament, go back and ignore. Tell us if it's time to go outside or outside. Tell babe, no questions, no judgment, or concerns. Go next 25 to 45 minutes. Everyone else on Airside, oh quieter, all the way to the doubt, but we are walking our story. Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls. Welcome and welcome back to another fun float edition of Soapboar. I hope your day is shaping up well. Go ahead and pour yourself up something bubbling and bright. I'm gonna go in the kitchen and see what I can scare up as we jump into season five, episode 13 of Falcon Crest Fair Game.

Christopher’s Sudden Crisis Of Faith

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Some moments in your life are so life-changing that you have to step back from what you knew. You do a complete 180. Pastor Panty Droppers has had a life-changing moment. I suspect it was in the bottom of that swamp. But in all fairness, he's had a couple life-changing moments. Number one, he found out that the gentle old lady who looked like little orphan Annie with a whole lot of money was his grandmother. He found out that his mother had gone on some sort of killing spree or attempted killing spree. Ended up in jail, ended up in a sanatorium, ended up on the run, ended up in a nun costume, ended up blew-up, only not blued up because she crawled through a crawl space. Now she's back in a nun's habitat without the garb. Found that out about his mother. Found out that his real daddy was probably, not probably, was a full on keto, who was baeing a 16-year-old girl and messed around and woke up dead when his wife set the house on fire. He woke up one day and had a grandmother, an insane mother, a brother, a sister, and another brother. It's a lot to take in. All of that information was powerful and palpable. And instead of running from it, what did he do? He ran through it. Let me get to know these people more. Let me dig deep. Let me cling to my faith a little bit more. So you can imagine my surprise, or not so much, when the one thing that could turn this man away from his faith, his profession, he just knew I'm a priest through and through. I'm gonna love these people through it. I'm gonna counsel them through it. I'm gonna be a good representation of forgiveness and faith and all that jazz. I'm gonna love my sister, I'm gonna love my brothers, I'm gonna love my grandmother. Until he happened to bond the baddest baddie in all of Tuscany Valley. Some might say the West Coast. Her and Abby are neck and neck to me at this point. Until he happened to bone Melissa, bad girl, jailbird, Agretti Cumson Giaberti. A woman so bad that the local priest Bobby couldn't handle her. He said, Young Buck, I'm gonna pass her off to you. And baby, the woman whose father was murdered by his mother has become his lover, I suspect. Now, I can't confirm what happened in that swampy pool, but a man with no draws stands no chance when bad girl Melly Mel is on the prowl, okay? She leapt into the water with her clothes. Now I don't know what happened. But I've I whatever happened was life-changing. He had he was baptized by something. Amen. He emerged from the water completely convinced that you know what? I you know, I feel like I've done a lot of forgiving in my life. All this pre-stuff has been fantastic. But I think, I think I'm gonna take a break for a minute. I actually I'm gonna quit. Last episode, he tried to pass off his resignation letter, but Father Bobby was like, absolutely not. I get to take naps and vacations now. Young man, why don't you take a break? Let me handle the paperwork. Just give it a beat. You still love the Lord? Yeah, I love the Lord. Okay, well, cool. Just take a beat. Give yourself a couple weeks, and we'll we'll revisit this at a later date in time, okay? At the top of this episode, Pastor Panty Dropper stops by Falcon Crest in a suit with no tie, which seems very fitting to me for a man who's been wearing the cloth all this time in that collar. He's like, Let me just not put anything around my neck. People might get the wrong idea. Let me go loosey goosey about the collarbone. Shows up at Falcon Crest and he gets right to it. He says, Grandmother, I need a place to stay. I'd like to stay here at Falcon Crest. I'm on a leave of absence. Angela is scandalized. What do you mean you're on a leave of absence? Absence from what? Leaving where? He says, uh, priesthood. I need a little break. Does Father Bobby know this? Father Bobby's the one who told me to take the break. She's like, I'll be damned. Why? What about your vows? He says, I took those vows because I thought I was an orphan. I didn't realize I had a whole family and a possible other life on the West Coast. I need a moment to process that. She's like, I cannot believe you. I cannot believe you would abandon your vows. And he's like, uh, because you lied to me. I didn't know who I was. And she's like, don't you don't you go blaming me for you believing my lies? That's on you. Isn't that a typical old woman? You the one who believed me. Didn't nobody tell you to believe me. That's you. All I did was lie. You the one who ran with it. Mind you, the boy was an infant and a child in an orphanage, yeah. She's like, my lying to you and deceiving you and hiding you away and keeping you away from your whole family and lying about your mama and funding you. What's that got to do with anything? You better get back down to that church. And he's like, fine. If you don't want me here, then I'm out. I don't want to stay here anyway because you're probably going to be all up in my business. She's like, okay, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. I'm sorry, baby. I'm just, I'm under a lot of stress too. I'll tell Chow Lee to fix up one of the guest rooms, Mikasa Sukasa. He's like, great. But while I'm here, I need you to be a little more hands-off, Grandma. Now, right about this time, Lance comes strutting in looking like a whole snack. Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, I have to reiterate that Falcon Crest, possibly because they had a little more time to get it together, has picked out the baddest male baddies in daytime, excuse me, primetime television, circa 1985. If I'm wrong, and I kind of hope I am, I want you, soap fiends, to recommend some other shows to me, okay? If there's anybody better than Chase Gioberdi, which there's not, so let's just move on from that. Lance Thompson, Pastor Panty Droppers, I'll even throw in coal. Let me know what show was serving male baddie better than these guys. Lance walks in. He hears a little bit. Angela tells him to go mind his business. It's none of his business, but Pastor Pantydroppers is a generous gentleman. He says, yes, it is. It's his business, he's family. I'm leaving the cloth for a minute. I'm taking a sabbatical. And Lance was like, my God, it's about time. It was the vow of poverty, right? Who? Wildly inappropriate, but I'm really glad he has a very supportive brother so far this episode. Also on the last episode, baby Margaret, or Maggie Jr., as I would like to call her. I think she has two names I can't forget, I can't remember them, but Granddaddy Chase shows up to the hospital looking like a whole meal. He's got on this coal, gray, and black, looks amazing. You know how on this show the theme or the color of the season has been yellow thus far. Every woman on the show wears a big scoop of yellow at some point. Terry's colorway seems to be white and gold and a lot of lame. This episode is no different. But the men on this episode emerge with their own theme. The theme for the men seems to be horizontal stripes. Love it. Okay. So Cole, excuse me, Chase Gioberdi shows up to the hospital looking amazing, looks like a million bucks. He's gonna meet his brand new granddaughter, baby Margaret. And he asks the very obvious question when Cole and Melissa show up to greet him. He says, Well, who is going to care for the baby? He doesn't mean nannies or anything like that. He wants to know who's gonna be the baby's mama. This is kind of a weird predicament. My son has knocked up his wife's cousin, who's a mama. Melissa and Cole with a whole chest say, Well, we are. We're going to be the parents. Robin's gonna skedaddle here in a bit, and we are gonna raise baby Margaret because she's ours. She is family. She is family, that's true. Shays is like, mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. We'll see. He pulled in Angela, but you know what? He's not wrong. Time will tell. On the

Lance And Apollonia Feel The Strain

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other side of town, Lance and Apollonia are trying to make it work. So he's feeling a little bit slighted because her music career is taking off and she doesn't need him like she did at the beginning. She was in the middle of a bar the first time he met her. He got to knock somebody out on her behalf. He got to fund her dreams. Well, now her dreams and her talent, in quotation, are taking her to the next level. Hold up. I forgot a very, very important part of this story. Do y'all know what Maggie was wearing in the middle of the hospital? Do you want to know? Leather pants. Y'all know damn well there's only one person on the show allowed to wear leather pants. Apollonia in this scene is dressed like Betty Rubble but make it leather. Why do I keep calling her Betty Rubble? There's something about Apollonia that reminds me of Halle Berry. And Halle Berry was a secretary in the Flintstones. So she looks a little bit more like Halle Berry in the Flintstones to me just because she's got on a fur collar or lapel and it's leopard print. Anyway, Lance and Apollonia are having a discussion with the uh photographer. They're trying to set up some promo photos. She's about to go on tour, so they need a bunch of photos. She is giving leather secretary from the Flintstones, and she feels like Lance is not as supportive. She can see that there's a little bit of distance between them. Now, on this scene, Lorenzo Lamas has really grown up. That's what is happening here. I can tell he's getting older. He's looking more like a grown man to me. Fine. Fine. He's wearing a brown and black horizontal striped shirt. Chase had on a gray and black one at the hospital. Lance is wearing a brown and black one. And for some reason, this episode, Lance got all his chesicles out. He has chased your birdie in this scene. I was a little bit distracted, but they look so cute together. Like the colorway, they're looking good. Dynasty is having is giving a run for their money. Yeah, this is around the same time. They're giving Dynasty a little bit of run for their money. Everybody is looking good. Especially Lance this episode, I gotta admit. Let the record reflect that I don't want to see another stitch of leather on the show unless it is on LPP. I need to acclimate to her new face. If they don't bring her back around, I'm gonna be very upset. She was such a silent, pivotal, well, silent as quiet as you can be in leather pants all day. Pivotal part of season four, and it is a travesty not to have her on this. On the other side of town, Jordan, being a lawyer and working for that tall drink of warm milk, Richard, is chilling at Tuscany Downs, reading over the latest legal developments in the world or something. The

Jordan Draws A Hard Boundary

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Manimal finds her, tells her that he and Angela are no longer going to pursue suing Richard because he was a publisher. They're gonna go straight after Maggie. And she's like, that's so interesting. The manimal really only stopped by. He could have sent her, he could have called, he could have sent, I guess he couldn't have sent an email, telegram, whatever the hell they're doing in 1986. But he just wants to see her. She's given him the cold shoulder, and he can't understand why this beautiful, brilliant woman who had been warming up to him is so calmly against continuing any sort of relationship with him if he's going to continue any sort of relationship with her dad. It is very important to note that he is clocking. I don't know why. I mean, I don't know what the the big secret is. I have my hunches, I've already expressed that, but it's important to remember that he is noticing who Jordan is, how she behaves, and he finds this to be unusual. I think he's even more uncomfortable that she's so calm about it. She's so resolute, she's not screaming, she's not carrying on, she's not giving any ultimatum. She's just basically saying, this is what it is, this is how I want to live my life. If you choose to mingle with that man who happens to be my father, that is 100% your prerogative. I wish you the best. When someone is calm and someone has a boundary and they're not really getting excitable about it, there's something about that sort of resoluteness that makes other people uncomfortable or it makes them pay attention. The manimal is paying attention. Good on him. Chase Gioburdi is such an enigma. In bed, he's in his pinstripe pants and top, and he is buttoned all the way up. The only time he's covered completely up is when he goes to bed. Which makes no sense to me. But maybe he's trying to hide. Maybe this is too intimate of a situation to be in. And he's feeling a little bit insecure about Maggie's book. Who is this effing stranger that is rocking his wife's world in this literary masterpiece? She's lucky that she had a little bit of amnesia because she can't for certain tell Chase that she had a little thing on the side. It's a mystery, and she can play that card all she wants because she's had amnesia. So she can never say, Chase, yes, this is a real person that I had on the side, but she can say that it is fictionally factual. She has no idea who this person is or if this person is even real. She doesn't remember writing the book at all, which seems kind of weird to me. It's making me feel like Richard wrote the book. So new lawyer guy comes by to go over the inevitable suing of Maggie's scrambled egg brain by Angela. And he wants to know if she's liable. If has Angela been made liable, like I have you actually, did you use her name? Did you accuse her of anything in the book specifically? Now, this is obviously the next day. Chase thinks this is too funny. He's like, she didn't say nothing that wasn't 100% true. I gotta bounce. Once Chase leaves the room, Maggie says, Say, lawyer, how can I extract the identity of this mysterious man in my book? Why she would ask a lawyer this, I'm sure I don't know. Lawyer man is funny, and he says, look no further, baby. That's me. You wrote all about me and you. Don't you remember? He thinks he's cute. He is cute. Ha ha. She's like, ha ha ha, mofo. I'm not playing with you. Really don't know why she's asking a lawyer about her possibly fictitious memory. He tells her to read and reread her ish until something tightens up in that soft boiled brain of yours. You'll get it, honey. Just keep reading and it'll come to you. I suppose a memory that powerful would eventually rear its ugly head or its beautiful head, but it could wreak havoc on her marriage.

Terry’s Countdown And Richard’s Panic

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Speaking of marriage, Aunt Terry shows up to Richard's office unannounced, of course, with her driver and handler who has remained nameless. We don't know what his name is. I hope it's something fantastic, but she shows up for whatever reason in a gold LeMay evening gown. Terry is only seen in evening gowns this entire episode. Now, I don't know where she's coming and going from, but maybe she decided to start spending some of that dead Michael money. And it looks good on her, but she's in a complete. She looks like a can of Diet Coke, the caffeine free one. And Richard's like, oh my God, God. Who let you in here? Why are you here? Smith Solid Gold Dancher is there to tell him he better propose soon or else. You have 45 hours. Not 45 hours, y'all. 48 hours to say yes. Or else she's gonna air his ish out in front of God and everybody, ruining his life even further, possibly putting him in jail. Now Richard is stressed. He is so stressed. He does what? You know what he does. He chuggelugs and a lukewarm room temperature glass of milk as fast as he can, praying for some relief. That milk has him trip, and he's acting a tea total fool. And he tries to chin check Jordan, who has grown weary of his intolerable attitude by this point. She lets him know she don't give a damn if he signs her check or not. Remember, I'm rich. I've been that girl. She doesn't take crap from men with milk mustaches. And it's iconic and ironic because she has on a professional crisp white-collared shirt and a cape over one shoulder. But in her case, let's make it cow print. Cowprint, ladies and gentlemen. Now she traded like this this bolo tie that would really set it off. I feel like I wish she had strings. There's no strings, but it's a cluster of those pearls. And she's got a set of matching earrings. Her hair is high as heaven. She can get on a plane and be in Dallas in a minute. Girl, I have never wanted a cow print blouse so bad in my life with an effing cape. Are you serious right now? And cluster earrings? I feel like I have those. They might be brooches. I feel like she her ears stick out a little bit, which makes me think that's why they tease her hair to high heaven. And then they always put her in a big, chunky, I'm talking silver dollar size earring. But she ate that down. It looks so good. I'm gonna get me a cape. I'm gonna get me a cow cape, and I dare somebody to moo with me. I dare them. Oh, anyway, I forgot the plot there for a second. Her tasseless bow loud bowlow tie and cow prints shirt are a beautiful piece of armor on this scene. And she tells Richard, you gotta get your life together. Richard confesses to her. I know, I'm so sorry that I popped off on you like that. You're right. I have a milk mustache on me, but they in my place. And he tells her everything. He's like, I'm scared because she's he's blackmailing me into matrimony. She said if I don't marry her in 48 hours, she's gonna turn me into the feds. I have to. And Jordan's like, dang, every time I come in this office, Richard, is something else. Dang. You do can lawyers fire their clients? Like, this is this is beginning to be a lot. He's demanding, he's irrational, and he seems to be a little bit irresponsible, but she seems to be loyal and she's gonna stick by his side.

Angela Presses Father Bobby

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Speaking of an irrational human being who expects total and complete loyalty, Father Bobby has been invited to Falcon Crest. You already know what it is. I think Father Bobby's wearing heels. He seems a little taller than I remember him being this scene, but it is what it is. Angela invites him into her freshly painted study. He takes a seat and she wants to know what the hell is going on. What are you gonna do about Christopher dropping the pastor from his panty dropping moniker? Bobby immediately gets loud with her. It's been a long day. He's having to deal with all these people Christopher has been dealing with. He probably hasn't had a stiff drink all day. So he starts getting loud. He tells her to mind her own business. She confesses, she seems to take it from him. Perhaps because he's wearing the cloth, he's wearing the collar. She's like, well, I don't want to be in trouble with the Lord too, so let me calm down and talk to him. Like I got some sense. She confesses that she feels like crap for telling this. For telling Christopher the truth. Not for lying, not for sending him to an orphanage on the other side of the country, not for basically, you know, tricking him into this life. She doesn't feel bad about that. She feels bad that she told him the truth. Who tells their priest? They feel bad about telling the truth. Oh my gosh. Bobby is like, okay, okay. I know I'm finna have a cocktail after this. I'm gonna show you a little mercy right now. Angela, would you rather that he do a job that he isn't suited for for the rest of his life? And she's like, Yeah, that's what you do. He was supposed to be a priest. Father Bobby just kind of leaves, like, okay, whatever. At dinner, which Father Christopher is missing, by the way, Lance casually mentions that he and Apollonia are gonna go on tour for six months. Angela says, a tour of what? Apollonia's like the world, I'll be. Angela looks at Lance and says, You better tour your ass around these grapes on this property. What you mean, tour? How does she get her? She's touring what? Singing who? I know you lying. You better get out there and pick them grapes. Stop playing with me. This is the family business, heavy on the family. And you know, I ain't picking that. You better, Lance, snap out of it. Emma's there and she casually mentions that with Christopher around, there's absolutely no reason why Lance can't go on tour. You can just show Christopher the ropes. As she's saying it, it clicks. She's like, oh crap, wait, hold on. This is gonna get messy. Angela looks at her like she just, I mean, she just invented lightning or something. Angela's like, Yeah, yeah, that's right. I forgot we got a whole new Falcon Crair S. What did I just say? A whole new air to Falconcrest. Lance is not feeling this. He's like, wow, okay. Okay. Angela continues to talk. She's like, yeah. CRISPR has a work ethic and hell, he might even take over one day. Lance hears this, it's like a douse of cold water on his dreams. He's like, damn, Apollonia do be caterwalling. I don't know if I want to be on a 180 days worth of that. I don't even know if that's math is proper. Is 180 days? That can't be six months, right? That's like four months. No. Hold on, guys. Okay, yeah. 182 and a half days is six months. I don't know how that works. 182.5. Anyway, he is having second thoughts. He ain't really feeling it like that. So a little later on, he is chilling on the couch, got his feet all up on this stark white couch when in walks Christopher. Wait, I forgot the most important part of this episode. Seriously.

Christopher Shuts Melissa Down

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Christopher is sort of MIA this whole time, but apparently he had gone to the hospital to visit Robin and the new baby and see how the baby's doing after the heart surgery. Well, while he's there in his brown horizontal vertical striped shirt, he sees Melissa in all red and a red leather purse. I have to flip out now. No, I'm not gonna flip out because it's male. She's happy to see him. He's happy to see her. They're making small talk. Oh, hey, I heard the baby's doing well. Yeah, she's so strong, she's so wonderful, blah, blah, blah. He's like, hey, can I holler at you for a minute? She's like, Of course, Father Christopher. He goes, Well, listen, you don't have to call me father no more. You can call me daddy. He doesn't say that. I'm sorry. He says, I have taken a leave of absence so I can figure out what I'm gonna do next. I'm just not sure if the priesthood is what I really want to do. Melissa hears this and she's like, This means we can finally be together. And he's like, Melissa, listen, we shared a lot of things. And um, I really, really, really enjoyed getting to know you, but you're married. And although I'm no longer the pastor in the pastor panty droppers, I can't have a married woman chasing me. And he is so hot in this thing. He's getting finer and finer to me. She's sick in her stomach, though. And I'm with Melissa on this. Listen, dude, you can't do this. You know what you're doing. You could have sent her a letter. Don't show up and be like, hey, guess what? I left the priesthood. I'm gonna be around, but you're still married. I'm just as married now as I was in that swamp. Do you know how? Just like you can write a letter and quit your job, I can quit this marriage. She's done it before. Women like bad girl, Mellie Mel, Elizabeth Taylor, JLo. You don't, what do you look like married to one person your whole life? Are you high? These women have 15, 16 marriages. She got a divorce lawyer in her back pocket. After that, that little meeting, Melissa tells him she doesn't want to see him again. She's pissed. She's pissed. Which leads me to believe she's just gonna up the annie at a later date. Christopher goes home and Lance is chilling on that white couch with his feet all on it or whatever. They're having a little bit of small talk, and Lance wants to know, hey dude, how long do you think you're gonna be hanging around here? He's like, I don't know, just long enough to figure out what I'm gonna do. Lance isn't saying anything. He's just biting his lip really seductively. Look, y'all, I'm sorry I keep saying it, but they're so hot. I don't know what happened. I don't know if everybody went to the spa, they like washed their face, everybody is shine. Just they look so good. They look so good. I promise Lorenzo Lamas is hotter to me because he looks older. He's like more of a man. You know what I'm saying? That jaw is squaring out, haircut popping. Christopher's looking more like a man too, but them together in the same room, like, oh my God. Christopher quickly picks up on the fact that Lance is a little bit uncomfortable with him being there. Not mad per se, not jealous, but just like uncomfortable. Chris looks at him and is like, I understand that you've been an only child all this time, and you probably don't want to share things with a new person. And Lance says something like, I'm not, or you don't want to give that up to someone new. Lance is like, I don't give up or I don't share. Something to that effect. But there's no animosity. But Christopher also didn't back down. Seems like there's an invisible line that has just been drawn. It's it's still friendly, it's still cute. But there's definitely something there. So Emma drops by the castle that Maggie and Chase live in, and she and Maggie are just chatter, chatter, chittering about the book. And Maggie's like, girl, how did you read my whole book? Emma tells her, My mom's suing you, so of course she managed to get her hands on the manuscript. I just stole it one night and read it cover to cover. Girl, I love it. Who is this mystery man? He's so seductive, he's so sexy. And Maggie's like, I really don't know. He is truly a mystery to me. Emma says, Well, don't you think it's funny that she's just dropping all these gems all episode long, by the way. She's like, Well, Emma's like, Well, isn't that funny? Like, you've always had Chase. I found Dwayne and he's bringing all the all the joy to my life. He's making all my dreams come true. He's making me realize the dreams I didn't even know I had. He's also making me forget other stuff, but you've always had that with Chase. Isn't it so funny? Like, you don't even need a mystery man. You've got Chase. It clicks for Maggie. She's like, oh my God. Oh my God, you're right. She jumps up, she gets on the phone, makes an anonymous phone call to God knows

Campaign Questions And Family Secrets

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who. Meanwhile, back at Falcon Crest, Angela offers to hold a little campaign party. She was, I'll hold a I'll throw a party for your little campaign. When a woman in my in my culture, if someone says for your little this, for your little that, it means they don't really think you're gonna do much with it. Now, sometimes it can be like, oh, girl, you'll cart. It's cute. It doesn't mean anything sometimes. But in this context, I think she's not, she's not super excited, but she's she's definitely not hating them. Like, I'll throw you a little party over here if you want. Greg is feeling froggy this episode, so he decides he's gonna jump. He asks Jordan's dad, We're doing all this campaigning. You are heavily out in the public. Don't you think it's kind of weird that your daughter doesn't want to be a part of that? The manimal has already told Jordan's dad that he and her had a little thing going on. They're not really seeing each other anymore. So the dad, I think the dad is a little bit suspicious that maybe Greg knows more than he is letting on because his body language and everything this episode, the manimals, that is, is totally different. Jordan's dad tells the manimal that it's really none of his business. You don't really need to worry about why me and my daughter do or don't get along. The manimal being a lawyer says, ah, ta-da-da. Not so. You are a public figure. Your public life is out for everyone to see. People are going to be a little suspicious if your daughter is not supporting you. Angela's like, yeah, wait a minute. Manimal's starting to make a little sense. I'm with you when you write. Do tell, Mr. Senator, why is your daughter not a fan of you? He's like, if you must know. When Jordan graduated from law school, she got mad at me because I didn't want to hire her for my firm. I wanted her to earn her own keep. She threw a fit. She barely talks to me since then. I don't know if Angela believes it. I doubt it. I'm sure she's smelling that that's kind of foul, but Greg immediately is like, wow, I don't really see Jordan being the type of person you need to coddle. I agree with him. I don't see that at all. She's very strong and she has yet to throw a fit over anything. Now, granted, people are different in their youth, but she does not strike me as that. She strikes me as a very poised woman. And plus, Greg has spent a lot of time with her one-on-one. He ain't buying this for one second. So this whole conversation has made him even more suspicious of her dad. Meanwhile, on the other side of town, Richard has gotten word about Jordan's dad running for governor and the manimal running for that. And he knows that Angela has her hands in both their pockets, and he don't like that. He don't like all this canoodling with a potential politician. He immediately puts a plan in place to ruin this campaign. He tells Jordan, Jordan, I'm about to blow up your daddy's whole spot. Are you in or you out? She's like, You like it, I love it. He's shocked. He's like, You're not, you're not upset that I'm gonna ruin your dad's campaign. She's like, I, honey, you do whatever you want to do. I'm down. Count me in. He's like, Well, damn. She's definitely cool with watching this ish burn to the ground. Before the conversation can be explored anymore, this random girl comes bursting into Richard's office. She is hollering, she's crying, she's saying that her husband just went full on MMA on her, beat her down because she tried to leave him. She's like, I tried to do what you told me, Jordan, and he beat me. Richard's like, wait, what? Who is this? What's going on? Jordan looks over his shoulder and says, I'm taking a lunch, Richard. I'll be back. She leaves. And the the random secretary is standing in the middle of the of the room, like, wow, what was that about? Richard says, I don't know, and I don't like not knowing. Richard and the secretary we've never seen before are left perplexed. Okay, just real briefly, the sheriff stops by Chase's place to let him know there better not be any funny business. Yeah, the mealy malls were created in a lab and dropped off into his orchard or field or whatever you call it, vineyard. Yeah, it sucks, but you better not be pulling any stunts. And Chase is like, that's cute. Oh yeah, all right. Got it. Angela Channing, despite almost being a bride to a man she wasn't really feeling, still feels a way about him leaving her, but also that is no excuse to curl up in a ball in bed and not be the baddie that she

Angela Finds Peter’s Paper Trail

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was born to be. Instead of getting upset, instead of crying and losing her power, she decides to do what she does best, and that is dirt. Dirt sometimes means you need to be a little bit better at research than the average person, and thankfully she is. Angela is a due diligence icon. She has collected all of Peter's business affairs and searched through them thoroughly with a fine-toothed comb. What she discovers is that he had added her to several of his personal businesses, and he'd moved his daughter's name completely off all of those businesses. Angela's like, I'm saying something isn't right. She brings it to the mammal. He looks over and he's like, that's really weird. She's like, Yeah, I do think that's really weird. I'm in, the daughter's out. He disappears before we can be married. And she also notices that there was a there was one piece of paper that was supposed to be filed a couple weeks back, but it never happened. Something ain't right. All I'm saying is there may or may not be some foul play. The manimal's like, are you sure? You sure he didn't just leave you? She's like, I mean, this don't really make sense to me that he would give me my land back, he'd give me most of his businesses and then bounce. That don't make sense to me. Oh. These little girls can't contend with a woman with a short just for me perm now. She's straightened it out. But does that stop Terry? No. Terry stops by in yet another evening gown, elbow length gloves. Angela looks at her like, Heifer, are you on a pageant or something? Why are you floating around my house looking all weird and whatnot? And she is. Terry is totally spinning around this whole time, not the whole time, but making a show of wearing the dress. She just wants to stop by and make an unofficial announcement. It's a red dress. I don't know if I mentioned that. Red dress, asymmetrical, red gloves, fabulous satin scarf or whatever. Satin shawl. She makes an unofficial announcement that she is about to become Mrs. Richard Channing. And she wants to thank Angela for opening up that position in her at Tuscany Downs. I really appreciate you pushing me into Richard's arm. I think it's going to pay even more for me. It's going to pay dividends. Thank you, boo. And Angela's like, oh my God. This rubs Angela the wrong way. So she does what any rational, not spoiled woman would do. She shows up to Richard's place unannounced to confront him about marrying a pop tart. Burst in and she's like, hey, guess who came by my house today? Your little wife came by. He's like, man, I don't know that girl. She ain't my wife. And she says, you know, Mrs. Richard Channing was a high-priced hookah. She used to turn tricks. You know that, right? She was a whole Richard says, Aren't we all whores? We just, some of us do it in kind of an obvious way. Who am I to judge her for being a whore? I'm like, okay, Richard, that's very progressive of you. I kind of think he's into it. If I'm being perfectly clear, perfectly honest here. I think he's like, ugh, I can work with that. Angela leaves because she did not get the reaction she wanted. And this is the first time Jordan is hearing about Terry being a hooker. She's like, oh my God, dude. I thought I thought you were more noble than that. I thought you cared about marriage in this way. I'm like, girl, what when? When did we ever hear this? I this is the first time I'm ever hearing about this. Because this man was about to marry Cassandra just to be petty. So yeah, he's super serious about relationships. That tracks. Richard tells not to worry her pretty little six-inch high gone head. Don't worry about that. I'm gonna make sure that this marriage is painfully short. I assure you of that. Okay, we got a little bit of just bit players we need to go ahead and get rid of.

Lance Backs Out Of The Tour

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Avalonia is heartbroken in her Elvira gown as she comes downstairs to show Lance who she's gonna wear on tour, and he has to drop the bomb on her. He wants to delay, if not completely, just break out of their contract and not go on the tour. And she's like, no, we have to. He's like, baby, there will be other tours. She goes, No, no, no, I want this one. I want you on it with me. I want to go. He lays it out. He's like, I can't really do that. Christopher has moved in and he's jeopardized my heirhood. Mr. Lockstock and Bible is here to take over the throne. Apollonia says, You being petty, you being a jealous little baby, and you only want what you can't have. You weren't worried about being the heir. Matter of fact, I'm gonna have to agree with her. He blew up his whole spot. He he he bought that radio station. He sold the globe to Richard. There was she was never going to leave you Falconcrest after that. But now that Christopher's there, there's a little bit of competition. I kind of see his point. He's never actually had to battle another male heir, and you know that's what she wants. She was ready to Angela, that is. Angela was ready to give everything to baby Joseph. So he's got an actual threat he's got to work on now. That sucks. But he looks hot doing it, and apparently he wants to stick around to make sure everything is not everything. In this totally random scene, Emma is trying to get her grown woman on. She ain't seen her man in a few days because you know what? He can't come by the house. He can't be on Falcon Crest property since he started his I'm calling it a wine hot shot business. Whatever. He's he's gonna be delivering wines and goods and stuff. So they're there at this hotel, and Emma gets grossed out when she says, Dude, do you realize six million people have boned on this very bed? We can't be bucking here. And he's like, I know, you're right, you're right. She goes, I want to bang where we always bang. Can we please, please go to the back of your truck and go on and handle this? And he's like, Honey, say less.

Robin Nests And Terry Drops A Bomb

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Over at Melissa's house, Robin is nesting. No pun intended. She is making sure that the baby's nursery, which is amazing looking, is is suitable for the baby. She ain't really feeling it. She feels like it's over the top, but I love it compared to any of the other nurseries we've seen thus far on any of the other shows. Robin thinks it's tacky as hell. Melissa thinks it's cute, and Robin sets the baby down. She's sort of fussing over her. And you can tell that Cole and Melissa are very uncomfortable because they're like, hmm, I wonder when she's gonna leave. Seems like she might be getting attached. And I'm like, dude, that's what their body language is giving off. Like it's very obvious that Robin is comfortable, she's happy. She ain't trying to leave that baby. And if she does, if she leaves Melissa's house, I guarantee you she's leaving it an oversized purse. It will not be a clutch, and that baby will be in that bag. And when the cops come, what can anybody say? What can they do? There ain't a whole lot they can do. So Maggie is at home one afternoon, waiting patiently for Chase to come home. Chase comes in and he's dressed just like Mr. Rogers. I mean, dark sweater, undershirt. He's completely buttoned up. I see not even one follicle of his glorious chest hair. So I knew something was wrong right away. He's had a long day. Oh rump. Maggie's like, hey, I know what'll make you feel better. Why don't you read the revised, rewritten version of my last chapter? And he's like, I ain't reading that crap. She's like, No, no, no, no, no, no. You'll you'll really like this one. This one reveals the identity of the stranger. He's like, yay. Sounds whack. I ain't reading that. She's like, baby, just read it. Let me tell you what it is. Think about it. It's so obvious. It was you. Think about it. The aviators, the attitude, the bare chest and the dead of winter, the smell of Jerry Curl Activator, baby. It was you. And he's like, Oh my God, Maggie. Oh my God. He brushes his hair behind his scene. You know, he's like, you wrote me, I'm your mysterious stranger. You're my mysterious stranger, baby. I'm your mysterious stranger. Before they can get into it, you know, they're about to try to get something popping. Maggie had bought champagne and all that. She's really trying to set the mood. Guess who shows up again? The ghost of Florida Past herself, Miss Terry, burst in once again. She's interrupting in yet another gown. She drops by to mess up the vibe and announced that she is gonna have a wedding in about one week. I'm marrying Richard, y'all. End scene.

Predictions And How To Reach Us

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Absolutely fantastic episode of Falcon Crest. There was a whole lot going on. I am most excited, of course, to see if Terry and Richard actually go through with this. I really need Cassandra to pop back up. I need LPP to pop back up. I need to see what Robin's fixing to do too, though. Robin's heavy on my mind, probably because it was like one of the next to last scenes. Robin is not leaving a baby. I'm gonna tell y'all that now. But is Melissa gonna let her leave? I feel like Melissa will put her in a body bag before she lets her walk off. The only little twist of this I can see coming would be if Father Christopher somehow gets in there and works that magic. I don't think Melissa would give up another baby, though. I mean, even though that's not her, it is her flesh and blood because it's her cousin. But even though she didn't give birth, I think it'd be really hard for her to leave another kid at this point. Come on, Falcon Crest. Also, I'm trying to figure out when they're gonna work in the Maggie and Richard angle. That was my first thought. When Terry burst in to announce that she was marrying Richard, I thought, oh crap, what is Maggie gonna think? What is Maggie gonna do? Also, I'm ready to get to the bottom of this Jordan and her father thing. The clues are pointing to definitely an abusive relationship of some sort. Maybe he used to smack her around. I didn't really think about that until the random woman came running in. It would explain why she's such an advocate for battered women or women who need to run away. But I really do think he either beat her or he allowed someone to take advantage of her and did nothing. Because she said, Well, you've committed the perfect crime. I don't really know what that means. She said that on the last episode. All right, guys. Oh well, we're gonna find out together on the next one. Remember, if you have any tidbits, you have any opinions on the show, or if you can name a hotter cast of primetime men circa 1980 through 1990, let me know. You can send me a text if you're listening on your mobile device. There is a link in the show notes. Send me a text. You can also send me a voicemail. Send me a couple because they are kind of short. If you have a lot to say or you want to include pictures or just chat a little bit more, send your girl an email. You can reach me at soaplorepodcast at gmail.com. That's S-O-A-P-L-O-R-E, P-O-D-C-A-S T at gmail.com. We're gonna get there, we're gonna get ready for dynasty, but in the meantime, in between time, keep your keep you two or three evening gowns at the ready. You never know. I am completely convinced that is the only way to drop bad news on people. Elbow length gloves, evening gown, or the very, very deep people. Stay hydrated, stay moisturized, mind your own business, and keep all of your drama on TV.