Timothy (DM)
Welcome to Shadows of Prophecy, a D&D real play podcast, where we will find out what it takes to become a hero, face our darkest fears, and pull ourselves out of a pit of despair. Shadows of Prophecy is a Dungeons and Dragons podcast with violent themes and adult language. Listener discretion is advised.
Timothy (DM)
With us today, to traverse through adventures of loss and tragedy, we have myself, Timothy, as our ambivalent DM; Chris as our professional negotiator cleric, Salvador Saltrose; Jen as the meek heiress to the Valerian estate, Lenore, Valerian; and Ellie, as the boisterous heir to the Camaxtli fortune; Xocatl Camaxtli. Join us as we enter the Shadows of Prophecy. Prologue: A World Unravels. Chapter Eight - Bound Souls.
Ellie (Xocatl)
I opened the coffin on the left.
Timothy (DM)
You open the coffin on the left.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Are they like stone? Sorry, I'm just figuring it out...
Timothy (DM)
They are shaped wood.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Oh, shaped wood.
Jen (Lenore)
So, I don't have to push [strained voice] a heavy stone?
Timothy (DM)
Yeah, no, no need to push a heavy stone. It just the lifts with a nice glide of a hinge.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Not even a creak?
Timothy (DM)
No creak.
Ellie (Xocatl)
[eyes narrow] Somebody lives down here.
Jen (Lenore)
Right in this coffin.
Chris (Sal)
[New York accent] "Whatya doin'? I'mma sleep in heer!"
Jen (Lenore)
[Dracula voice] And then a vampire pops out!
Timothy (DM)
And inside, you see a corpse of a person in a dress, holding an empty phylactery. On their fourth left finger, you see a signet ring of a sea turtle.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Which one was... but, was that in... the sea turtle?
Timothy (DM)
Leona Valerian.
Ellie (Xocatl)
[to Lenore] They were in love?
Jen (Lenore)
[unsure] I don't know! What about the other one?
Ellie (Xocatl)
I'll open the other one.
Timothy (DM)
You open the coffin of Deardra Camaxtli... and it is empty [Jen: "Aw"] except for the signet ring of an orchid.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Well...
Jen (Lenore)
I don't know what happened, but I just got really sad. [Tim laughs] [to Xocatl]...well, get in! [all laugh]
Ellie (Xocatl)
[outraged] "Ex-CUUUSE ME!!!" Xocatl PUNTS Lenore across the room! "YOU get in!"
Jen (Lenore)
That was Jen saying that.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Oh, no that's very funny. It's very funny.
Jen (Lenore)
It's a good... it's a good, it's a Spongebob one where he's just like "Get in!"
Ellie (Xocatl)
Oh, it is? I don't about SpongeBob references well.
Chris (Sal)
We'll send that
Jen (Lenore)
We'll send it.
Ellie (Xocatl)
.Okay, great.
Ellie (Xocatl)
[slowly] Well, I... am going to go... try to take the sea turtle ring... off of the, um, lady?
Jen (Lenore)
We'll send it, don't worry.
Jen (Lenore)
Can I roll... can I roll History to see if I know the name of this person, this Leona?
Timothy (DM)
Give me an a History roll, Lenore.
Chris (Sal)
And I'm guessing Deardra is a family member of yours?
Jen (Lenore)
12.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Yeah, Big D, Big Beautiful D; everyone loves her! The boat's named after her!
Chris (Sal)
[shocked] She's a boat?!?
Timothy (DM)
You don't know this from your family history, but you do recognize it from a name in the family tree. This was at the beginning. This is the first name listed in the series of books.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Do I recognize Deardra?
Timothy (DM)
You recognize Deardra for two reasons: one, it is the name of the ship that you took here; and two, it is the first name listed in the other series of books at the beginning of this burial chamber.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Oh, so they're like the founders? We knew that.
Jen (Lenore)
But why is one missing?
Ellie (Xocatl)
[shrugging] Well... somebody has to take care of the roses. [Chris laughs] I don't know. Hey, look! I don't know.
Chris (Sal)
Could it be that she turned into the boat?
Jen (Lenore)
Oh, no! She's a boat?
Ellie (Xocatl)
Well--
Jen (Lenore)
[tearfully] Trapped forever? In a... in a boat? On the seas...? [pause] With no mouth or anything? [Chris and Ellie laugh] Just floating? [pause] That's so sad; I'm gonna keep talking.
Ellie (Xocatl)
[dismissively] Okay, well, she's probably not a boat. And also what's up with this-this little jar, huh? Fancy little jar?
Jen (Lenore)
Oh, the phylactery, I forgot about that.
Timothy (DM)
It's empty.
Ellie (Xocatl)
I guess I--
Timothy (DM)
--which is not normal for phylacteries.
Ellie (Xocatl)
--yes, like, the whole point is they have blood in them.
Jen (Lenore)
[slyly] Oh, I know where we can get some blood. [all laugh]
Ellie (Xocatl)
Well, so... I'm going to try and, like, ease the Camaxtli signet ring off of the, uh--
Jen (Lenore)
[sassily] What are you touching my dead ancestor for? Get out of here!
Ellie (Xocatl)
She has something of mine.
Jen (Lenore)
You don't know that; it could have been hers. Clearly! I mean, it was clearly hers; it's on her dead finger for thousands of years.
Ellie (Xocatl)
She's not using it anymore, and--
Jen (Lenore)
[superstitious] You are gonna cause a curse to happen right now!
Ellie (Xocatl)
[selfishly] "Well, so be it! But I've takin' this ring!" and I yank it off the finger and maybe even disturb the phylactery when I do it if it's, like, laid between her interlaced hands or whatever.
Timothy (DM)
Yeah, so you rip the signet ring off of her finger, and the phylactery rolls to the edge of the coffin, and now you're holding the signet ring, and you wait for something to happen--
Ellie (Xocatl)
I have to assume this is what I was sent here to get.
Timothy (DM)
--and nothing happens.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Well...
Jen (Lenore)
I fix her; I put the phylactery back in her hands.
Timothy (DM)
All right.
Ellie (Xocatl)
I don't know if I was expecting anything to happen. My mom was said to come here and get a ring so... or y'get a relic... Relic acquired! I'm ready to head back.
Chris (Sal)
Lenore, does your grandma know anything in regards to one of your ancestors being what I presume to be a lich?
Jen (Lenore)
[to Tim] Do I know that?
Timothy (DM)
Leona Valerian is accounted for; Deardra is not.
Jen (Lenore)
--the Lich, maybe... [Tim laughs]
Ellie (Xocatl)
I also just gonna put the ring on my other hand. I've got my own signet ring on this hand, and then I'll just put this on one. That one on the other hand: double ringin' it.
Chris (Sal)
[looking at the corpses] Oh, that makes a lot of sense. Okay, sorry.
Ellie (Xocatl)
[suspicious] Oh, what makes a lot of sense, leader?
Jen (Lenore)
Are you... are you...? [Tim laughs]
Chris (Sal)
What? Oh. He's sitting at the edge of the cough and just trying to think, "Oh, why is that... [pointing to Deardra's empty coffin] oh, she's a lich because she's not here anymore."
Ellie (Xocatl)
But then why is this other person have the phylactery?
Chris (Sal)
Because that's where it's stored. Usually you store it somewhere where people can't find it.
Timothy (DM)
But this phylactery's empty.
Jen (Lenore)
Empty.
Chris (Sal)
[stumped] Oh.
Timothy (DM)
So, to quickly run through facts: Leona Valerian is accounted for, her phylactery is empty, she is wearing a Camaxtli signet ring.
Ellie (Xocatl)
[brandishing the ring] Not anymore!
Timothy (DM)
The empty coffin for Deardra, who is missing, has JUST the signet ring of the Valerian family.
Chris (Sal)
Oh, was it supposed to make it seem like Leona disappeared, and she put Deardra's body in this one to make it seem like Deardra is missing, but when she's actually... Leanna's actually missing?
Ellie (Xocatl)
Uhhhh, or they just traded rings because they were in love--
Chris (Sal)
Maybe.
Ellie (Xocatl)
"--and they were... wives. [to Lenore] Do you want your ring?" I pick it up out of, uh, the empty coffin and hold it out to her.
Jen (Lenore)
Sure? Yeah, I take it.
Ellie (Xocatl)
There you go. [looking at the duo] Well? [to Salvador] And then on the way out, we'll get your amulet. Great! [clapsing hands] I'd say we're all happy here!
Chris (Sal)
Let's see if we met the goals of the mission. We learned--
Ellie (Xocatl)
We haven't taken any notes. [Chris laughs] I pull out the empty piece of paper that you gave us at the beginning. I haven't taken any notes.
Chris (Sal)
To be fair, there wasn't a lot to make--
Jen (Lenore)
Mine's wet. [all laugh]
Ellie (Xocatl)
Yeah, mine is wet too.
Jen (Lenore)
I pick it up, and it's all soggy and...
Chris (Sal)
Our bodies are totally soaked. Everything is thoroughly soaked.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Yeah.
Chris (Sal)
Well, I guess you have your your tokens. There's only two real bodies that we know of that are in these tombs that aren't just bones. So, yeah, I think this is pretty successful.
Jen (Lenore)
I'm gonna pick up the phylactery and poke my finger with a dagger.
Ellie (Xocatl)
[very WTF] Oh, Lenore?!?
Jen (Lenore)
[laughing] And see what happens...
Ellie (Xocatl)
Hey! What are you doing? I don't think that's a good idea--
Chris (Sal)
Wait until we get OUT of the tomb.
Jen (Lenore)
I feel like this is important, you guys.
Ellie (Xocatl)
No, I don't think that's a good idea at all.
Jen (Lenore)
Mmm. [pouts]
Timothy (DM)
So, Lenore, you pick up the phylactery, you have a dagger in hand, you jab your finger as everybody else is--
Jen (Lenore)
Like, "Waiiiit, hang on, wait a minute!"
Timothy (DM)
--very concerned, and blood starts pooling out of the tip of your finger, and then it starts to turn into a red cloud and funnels its way into the phylactery, and you just see little droplets of blood filtering into this phylactery, one drop at a time.
Jen (Lenore)
It's kind of cool.
Ellie (Xocatl)
You're 14! What do you need to be a lich for? [Tim laughs]
Jen (Lenore)
[innocently] Oh, is that what happens?
Ellie (Xocatl)
[clinching bridge of nose] Oh my god.
Chris (Sal)
You don't just go poking yourself with daggers and touching strange jars.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Do you put blood in every jar you find?
Jen (Lenore)
[spinning excuses] Well, it's a blood jar! It's a jar for blood, and it's empty!
Ellie (Xocatl)
How can you tell that it's a jar for blood? Maybe it's a jar for iced tea.
Jen (Lenore)
I don't think you could be buried with iced tea--
Ellie (Xocatl)
I could kill for an iced tea right now. [Chris laughs] I would like to be buried with iced tea--I'm GONNA be buried with iced tea in like 10 minutes if this whole blood thing goes crazy. Anyway... that's great for you.
Jen (Lenore)
Thank-thank you. Thank you?
Ellie (Xocatl)
Is there anything else that's happening, or do we just have a weird jar full of blood now?
Timothy (DM)
Just a weird jar. [laughing] This isn't full blood, it's just, like, a little, a couple little drops.
Jen (Lenore)
I put it in my bag. [Tim laughs]
Ellie (Xocatl)
Great.
Jen (Lenore)
[nonchallantly ]Yeah, see, put the phylactery in your bag...
Ellie (Xocatl)
Now we've ALLLL got what we came here for, huh?
Chris (Sal)
I guess so... This is the end of the line?
Jen (Lenore)
I just feel like this is... there's more to this.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Do you want me to poke my finger too?
Jen (Lenore)
[unsure] Maybe?
Ellie (Xocatl)
"All right, great." I take her dagger, I poke my finger, and I hold it over also the jar opening.
Timothy (DM)
Your blood also begins to turn into a red cloud, drop by drop, and swirl into the phylactery. Now your blood is mixing.
Ellie (Xocatl)
There you go. So, if anything fucked up happens to you, it'll happen to me too. I got'chu.
Jen (Lenore)
That's really nice. Thank you.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Whatever horrible afterlife plane [Ellie and Jen laugh] that you're gonna get yourself sucked into, my little friend, you're gonna need somebody to watch your back.
Chris (Sal)
Salvador is, like, tearing up seeing--
Ellie (Xocatl)
[points to blood jar] Salvador, you want to get in on this? [Tim laughs]
Chris (Sal)
[shakes head] I'm good. [Jen laughs]
Ellie (Xocatl)
Are you sure?
Chris (Sal)
[pointing toward Bottomless Bowl of Blood] There's some blood you can... I'm a hemophiliac, so, no.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Oh, yeah, that's, that's fine.
Jen (Lenore)
[nodding] Fair, fair.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Well...
Chris (Sal)
I put the lids back on the coffins. [Jen laughs] *ERR ERR*
Ellie (Xocatl)
Do up the latches.
Jen (Lenore)
I slowly close the lid and say goodbye to my departed family member.
Chris (Sal)
Did you keep the jar?
Jen (Lenore)
Mmhmm.
Chris (Sal)
Okay.
Ellie (Xocatl)
I tell you what: I cannot wait to get back to the ship and have some--
Jen (Lenore)
Iced tea?
Ellie (Xocatl)
--friggin' eggs benedict. [all laugh] Well, after you, leader,
Chris (Sal)
He mops his forehead 'cause he's been sweating this whole time, and he--
Ellie (Xocatl)
He's also just wet.
Chris (Sal)
Yeah, I'm just I'm wet! I'm-I was bloody, and I'm just confused. So, I, uh, turn on my heel, and I start to go towards the Bowl of Blood, and I wait for them to come, and I say "I will follow right behind you."
Jen (Lenore)
Can I do one more look around the room?
Timothy (DM)
Yes, you may. Are you looking for anything in particular or...?
Jen (Lenore)
No, just anything.
Timothy (DM)
All right, just give me Perception check.
Jen (Lenore)
That's a 15.
Timothy (DM)
A 15. So, you quickly scan the room. You see the two coffins sitting on opposite ends of the small chamber, and the last thing you really notice is at the top of the doorway leading out: again, the crest of a sea turtle over an orchid.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Are you wearing your signet ring?
Jen (Lenore)
No, I keep mine on a chain around my neck.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Do you wanna, like.... I was thinking we could fist bump.
Jen (Lenore)
"Okay, we can try that." I put the new signet ring on, and we fist bump them together [laughs]
Ellie (Xocatl)
Just a hunch.
Timothy (DM)
You bump your fist together and... nothing happens.
Jen (Lenore)
Well, that was nice!
Ellie (Xocatl)
Well, we bump fists, and do a little, like, *budlle-luddle-luh*
Jen (Lenore)
Yeah, we do!
Timothy (DM)
Yeah, you do your little finger flourish.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Like, turn...kind of turn it into a whole intricate handshake.
Jen (Lenore)
Yeah, wow, camaraderie! That's nice. I've never had a friend before!
Timothy (DM)
But you find yourselves--
Ellie (Xocatl)
[to Lenore saying she's never had a friend] That's understandable.
Timothy (DM)
--a little bit closer than you started.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Friendship was the true journey... [pointing to the crest] but they're on top of each other!
Chris (Sal)
Yeah, that's the thing. You'd have to either put the bo-- one body on top of the other or one... have-have both signet rings--
Ellie (Xocatl)
We're stacking corpses!
Timothy (DM)
So, it's like... [imitates an overlay]
Chris (Sal)
Oh, they're crossed.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Oh, they're like overlayed.
Timothy (DM)
Like overlayed, sorry.
Ellie (Xocatl)
I was picturing, like, a sea turtle ON TOP, yeah!
Timothy (DM)
Yeah, a sea turtle overlaid on an orchid.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Okay, I've been picturing that like wrong.
Timothy (DM)
The two crests are just combined.
Ellie (Xocatl)
--like overlayed.
Chris (Sal)
Crossed.
Jen (Lenore)
Okay, okay.
Ellie (Xocatl)
[deflated] Well, nevermind then.
Chris (Sal)
Yeah, I thought there was, like, a puzzle, like "You have to put both rings on your hand and slap that turtle over there."
Ellie (Xocatl)
Well, maybe it's just saying that you should be friends; our family should be friends after all. I don't have a problem with that (even though you're a little bit annoying, but...).
Jen (Lenore)
Oh, well. Thank you.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Yeah, you're welcome.
Jen (Lenore)
I'd be okay with that.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Great.
Jen (Lenore)
Okay.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Done deal. How do you feel about... cocktails?
Jen (Lenore)
I am not really supposed to drink, but--
Ellie (Xocatl)
That's not what I asked.
Jen (Lenore)
Oh, I-well, uh! No, I drink some wine sometimes with my grandma.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Okay, that sounds nice. You're a classy lady. I think we're gonna get along.
Jen (Lenore)
[nodding] Mmhm. Mmhm. Mmhm.
Ellie (Xocatl)
I've got a great vintage. I'm gonna show it to you when we get out of here.
Jen (Lenore)
Oh, okay!
Ellie (Xocatl)
Yeah. Real nice.
Jen (Lenore)
That sounds really nice. Thank you.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Yeah, I'm not supposed to know about it.
Jen (Lenore)
Okay; it's a secret! [Tim laughs]
Ellie (Xocatl)
It's a secret. Yeah, my family purchased it the year that my great-great grandmother was born, and they keep it at a secret special place where eventually they're gonna, you know, like, drink it in her memory, but I've actually just been taken sips of it this whole time and when they go and get it, it's gonna be gooooooone and so will I, bay-beeeee!!! [all laugh uproariously] XOCATL'S OUT! Yeah, and then my older brother had to go and die, now I'm RESPONSIBLE for everythingggggg, so it's just--
Jen (Lenore)
[trying to connect with Xocatl on a personal level] My siblings died too!
Ellie (Xocatl)
I know. I just fooled myself. He was gonna be all surprised and disappointed, and now he's dead!
Jen (Lenore)
Oh, I was trying to related to you by saying, "Oh, my siblings are also dead." [laughs]
Ellie (Xocatl)
[sardonically] Well...how fun for us.
Jen (Lenore)
I know.
Chris (Sal)
Now, you're the heirs, and think: you could have a-a great partnership between your two families.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Yeah, I think so. Nobody would be able to stop us.
Jen (Lenore)
That's true. [feeling generous] I'd like to start paying our workers.
Ellie (Xocatl)
I think you're gonna like my younger sibling. [Chris laughs] I do have a younger sibling; do you have a younger sibling? [completely ignoring the fact that she literally said that all of her siblings are dead]
Jen (Lenore)
No, I am the last one.
Ellie (Xocatl)
[retaining that classic Xocatl charm] Yeah, that makes sense.
Chris (Sal)
Oh, ouch.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Anyway, let's take a swim out of here. Xocatl'll go first.
Timothy (DM)
All right. So, you all start making your way out of this very bizarre experience. Do you try to grab your...
Chris (Sal)
Yeah, I yank it out. *HUMPH* Oh, I closed the doors to the... to the lady.
Timothy (DM)
Yeah, so you close the doors behind you. Xocatl jumps into the watery cavern beneath you. Salvador pulls the amulet from the altar and sees blood start to... fill up the basin yet again, and you all jump into the water, swim through the cavern, enter into the next chamber, climb up into the Tunnel of Bones, crawl your way through, snapping just a few more femurs on your way out--
Ellie (Xocatl)
Just a couple we missed the first time. [laughs] Do we see my little friends or no? They're probably long gone.
Timothy (DM)
Yeah, they're gone.
Ellie (Xocatl)
My skeleton buds, yeah.
Timothy (DM)
Yep, crawl on into the chamber with the now broken empty mirror frame, back through the set of double doors into the altar room.
Ellie (Xocatl)
I still, by the way, have the book, the last book from ours, I-I took it when we first left the room and I still have... I guess it's wet now, fuck! Well, whatever.
Chris (Sal)
Yeah. Well, you could've put it in a bag, so it might be slightly less wet.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Hmm, yeah.
Jen (Lenore)
Yeah, I wanted to look again at the names of my family.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Oh, yes, see if you could find her.
Jen (Lenore)
--and ask... and find her and then ask you if you recognize any of the other names?
Ellie (Xocatl)
Do I recognize any of the names?
Timothy (DM)
So, Lenore starts showing Xocatl some of the names in the book. [whispers] Are you asking about the demon names?
Jen (Lenore)
Yeah.
Timothy (DM)
Okay, you're asking [laughs] Okay. Um, so you show your family tree to Xocatl, and Xocatl, you instantly recognize the difference. The statements that each of these family members appear to be... have been offered to some sort of entity, but you don't recognize those names.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Every family's got their little "quirks" but no, I don't recognize any of these names.
Jen (Lenore)
Okay. I figured I'd ask.
Ellie (Xocatl)
You guys some kind of a cult or something?
Jen (Lenore)
[tersely] Well, kind of.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Yeah. That's fine,
Jen (Lenore)
--unfortunately. Yeah.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Yeah. My great-great uncle went off. Started a cult; not long-lived but he was very charismatic.
Jen (Lenore)
Oh wow! Mmm-mmm-mmm. That helps. It does.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Yeah, well, can I take one last look at this statue... like, this armored statute. I want to take a gander at it.
Jen (Lenore)
That's really brave of you, and I'm proud of you. [Tim laughs] You're being really... brave.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Leaderly almost?
Jen (Lenore)
Almost leaderly
Ellie (Xocatl)
Almost literally?
Jen (Lenore)
Mmhm.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Wow. Eh. [Ellie and Jen turn slowly toward Chris] [all laugh]
Chris (Sal)
Salvador nods approvingly, and he takes the L hat that he has on and he puts it onto Xocatl's head.
Ellie (Xocatl)
[checking himself out] Oh, hey hey, not bad. [honsetly] Do I look cool?
Jen (Lenore)
You look really cool.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Thanks. All right, I'm gonna take a close look at this statue. Can I do, like, an Investigation check or something to see if there's anything, like, weird about it?
Timothy (DM)
Yeah, do an Investigation check.
Jen (Lenore)
Okay, that is a 12.
Timothy (DM)
All right. So, you start to inspect the statue again, giving it a second glance, and you start to realize that there's a couple of features that you didn't take into account earlier. One, you can notice long hair flowing out from the bottom of the helmet. Two, you recognize the form of the chestplate--
Jen (Lenore)
[whispers] It's Deardra [Tim laughs]
Timothy (DM)
--has space for breasts.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Maybe! I was thinking about too. Okay.
Timothy (DM)
--and other than that, you just notice the emblem of a sea turtle... overlaying an orchid.
Jen (Lenore)
Wow... cool. [laughs]
Ellie (Xocatl)
Badass.
Jen (Lenore)
[whole-hearted assent] Badass! [Tim laughs]
Ellie (Xocatl)
I, uh... y'know, when I get out of here, I'm gonna grow my hair long; that looks pretty good. [sighs] Well, shall we go?
Jen (Lenore)
We shall.
Ellie (Xocatl)
All right, I'll lead the way back into the tunnel, the weird vertical tunnel hole.
Timothy (DM)
Yep, so you push open the final set of double doors, and you see the lonnnnnng dark tunnel ahead of you, and at the end, you can see the starry sky above you?... as you start to remember that you've been going down this entire time! [Ellie laughs] And so you begin to walk down this tunnel, the light of the stars becoming ever closer, until you approach the rope laying on the ground. You know to grab it and just start your ascent back up to the mouth of the pit. You emerge out the top, standing once again on the jagged rocks of the island. You see your paddle boat on the shore nearby and your ship just off the coast.
Jen (Lenore)
[in a "Teacher, you forgot to collect the homework" voice] Is it safe to paddle back in the dark? [Tim laughs] I feel like maybe we should camp.
Ellie (Xocatl)
I have dark vision; it's alright.
Jen (Lenore)
Okay.
Ellie (Xocatl)
--so does Salvador.
Chris (Sal)
Yeah, there's not too much of, uh, space. I don't want to roll over in my sleep and--
Ellie (Xocatl)
Fall into the pit.
Jen (Lenore)
That's fair.
Ellie (Xocatl)
'sides: I got some eggs benny callin' my name. [Chris laughs]
Jen (Lenore)
Alright, Lenore clutches her eyes closed the whole way back to the ship... 'cause she's scared.
Ellie (Xocatl)
This time, Xocatl helps paddle.
Jen (Lenore)
Xocatl paddles. [jazzy song] Xo-catl padd-llllles!
Timothy (DM)
So, you start paddling back to the ship, the starlight reflecting off the water of the sea and casting a faint glow over the silent ship sitting in the water, and you paddle up, waiting for some indication of life on the boat... but it is all silence, aside from the splash of water as the paddles hit the surface.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Well...
Jen (Lenore)
H-hello?
Ellie (Xocatl)
I knock on the side of the boat like it's the door. *knock knock knock knock*
Timothy (DM)
You hear the sound of wood as you hit the side of the boat, it echoes across the surface of the water, and again, you fall into silence. You can see a rope ladder, just down five feet, towards the back of the ship.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Well, this is embarrassing. They're usually much better behaved than this. [Jen laughs] Let's go paddle up to the rope ladder, and I'll climb it up and see what's going on with my ship.
Timothy (DM)
Alright, so you paddle on over to the rope ladder. You hoist yourself up onto it and begin to climb. You're still listening for some sort of indication of life on the ship as you reach the top and you see your crew standing around in a semicircle facing you. [Jen fearfully inhales] They all hold scimitars and just lock eyes with you.
Ellie (Xocatl)
[waving arms at Sal and Lenore, exasperated] Okay! Allowed! [Tim laughs] Fine! Allowed!
Timothy (DM)
[joyously] Everybody roll initiative.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Ohhh shiiiiit.
Jen (Lenore)
[sad by the roll] Oh god.
Ellie (Xocatl)
[sad by the roll] Oh boy. Oofa-doofa.
Timothy (DM)
And I know I said there were 20 people on the ship -- we're not going to fight 20 people.[laughs]
Chris (Sal)
Yeah, understandably.
Ellie (Xocatl)
What happened to my BOYS?!?
Jen (Lenore)
10!
Ellie (Xocatl)
6... [introspective] I pushed them too far.
Chris (Sal)
7.
Jen (Lenore)
Wow, some rolls.
Chris (Sal)
Yeah, this is not a good day
Timothy (DM)
I roll the 2. [players rejoice]
Ellie (Xocatl)
Great!
Chris (Sal)
Perfecto!
Jen (Lenore)
Excellent.
Timothy (DM)
Okay, so it will be Jen, Chris, Ellie, Myself. Lenore, you are climbing the rope ladder. You still hear silence, you've seen Xocatl has crested over into the ship. You would be next in line on the rope ladder.
Jen (Lenore)
Ok, yeah, I climb up as well, and now I see all the... all the bad guys. I am gonna cast Crown of Madness on one of the du-- [California voice] on, like, the toughest lookin' dude.
Timothy (DM)
[laughing] All right, so what do we do with that?
Jen (Lenore)
It's a Wisdom save
Timothy (DM)
A Wisdom save. Okay, so you climb up the ladder, uneasy with the silence. You get right up to the top. You see Xocatl looking uneasy. Hand on... what's your weapon?
Ellie (Xocatl)
I have two flails on either side.
Timothy (DM)
Okay, hands on their flails. You're surrounded by the crew members that you sailed here with. They were weird before but they're REALLY weird now. [laughs]
Jen (Lenore)
Are they saying anything or they just, like, st-staring--
Timothy (DM)
They're completely silent, staring at the two of you. They are drawing their scimitars and looking as if they're about to lunge; you cast Crown of Madness on the tallest, scariest lookin' person, and they... they're gonna get 6.
Jen (Lenore)
[coolly] Okay, cool. So, I'm gonna instruct them to attack the guy next to them... and now they do that.
Timothy (DM)
All right. So, you cast the Crown of Madness, you see a thorny crown appear upon their head as they slowly turn to the person next to them, and they kind of bring down their scimitar on them, and the other crew member is able to step out of the way just in time as the scimitar slashes down to the wood of the ship.
Jen (Lenore)
Okay, so the charmed target must use its action before moving on each of its turns to make a melee attack against a creature that... other than itself that you mentally choose.
Timothy (DM)
All right. So, Salvador, you are the last one climbing up. You've heard the impact of a sword hitting the wood of the deck.... not much else. [laughs] You heard Lenore utter some phrases. So, yeah, you're able to climb up that ladder., and you can then see the scene.
Chris (Sal)
Are they undead? There humans? They're thralls?
Timothy (DM)
Yeah, they're just humans.
Ellie (Xocatl)
They're just regular humans.
Jen (Lenore)
They're just guys, normal guys.
Timothy (DM)
[nonchalantly] They're just regular humans.
Ellie (Xocatl)
They're my employees. [Tim laughs]
Jen (Lenore)
[curiously] Hmm.
Ellie (Xocatl)
...they're unionizing.
Chris (Sal)
In that situation, I'm going to run up into the middle. I want to get 15 feet away from the other two, and I want to cast Thunder Wave. So, they all have to do Constitution saving throws.
Timothy (DM)
We've got a 12, a 15, and a 12.
Chris (Sal)
12, 15 and 12. Everything.... oh, dang it. They all save because it matches my spell save DC. So, on a save, they take half damage of 2d8!
Timothy (DM)
Alright, so you slam down your bolt of electricity through the ground in a cone around you towards three of the crew members.
Chris (Sal)
And they're not pushed, so they take 7 points of thunder damage, and then I'm going to use the rest of my movement to move back.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Oh, I would like to (and you tell me how this, like, looks like it would work out for me): I want to try and get to the hold using, like, movement and Dash. Do I have to run through them, or can I sort of, like, skirt around them?
Timothy (DM)
Give me a Dex save as you skirt around some of the crew members to get to the stairs of the hold.
Ellie (Xocatl)
That's a 12?
Timothy (DM)
It's just enough.
Ellie (Xocatl)
[cha-chinging his arm, whispering] Yesssss.
Timothy (DM)
They almost grab you by the collar as you spin on point and head down the stairs, bolting as fast as you can. You make it down into the hold, and that's when you see the glow from behind the planks at the back of the ship.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Huh.
Timothy (DM)
Little shards of light between the cracks in the boards.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Like something's under or like behind--
Timothy (DM)
Behind it.
Ellie (Xocatl)
[hand on chin] Well, this was not my plan, but interesting. Do I have any... I used my event to move, my action to dash. So, I think that's gonna be it for me for right now... Ha! JK, I'm gonna use Action Surge! [Ellie and Tim laugh]
Timothy (DM)
Yay, Action Surge!
Ellie (Xocatl)
And so... am I, like, near the wall?
Timothy (DM)
So, it's maybe 20 feet out. It's on the other side of the room.
Ellie (Xocatl)
My one additional action I'm going to take is... hopefully-- well, we'll see. You tell me if this counts as an action: I want to light the barrels of pitch on fire. [Tim laughs]
Jen (Lenore)
[timidly] You're gonna try to burn us all alive?
Ellie (Xocatl)
Not us, but here's...! My internal logic (that you guys don't know about) is that the workers are thralled to prioritize the safety of the ship and an active fire on the boat is a more immediate threat than we are, and so if there's a fire occurring, they will all go try and resolve that and leave us alone for at least a little while, and I have faith in their ability to resolve it! So, it'll buy us some time. [Tim laughs] But now I'm really curious about this, but I'm... so I'm going to, like, try and, like, torch the pitch and then my next turn I'll go check out this light thing.
Timothy (DM)
Yeah, Action Surge gives you another action in a turn?
Ellie (Xocatl)
Yeah.
Timothy (DM)
Okay.
Ellie (Xocatl)
You can take one additional action.
Timothy (DM)
All right. So, you whip out your flint from your sack, and you start hitting it against the pitch in one of the barrels, and it quickly lights up.
Ellie (Xocatl)
I have a--!
Jen (Lenore)
I hope this works!
Ellie (Xocatl)
--I think for a minute. [suddenly thinking] Yeah, I also think for a minute "Shit; I hope this works." [Tim works]
Jen (Lenore)
[narrator voice] Otherwise, we're all dead.
Ellie (Xocatl)
I went into this feeling really confident and now that I've actually been faced with the situation, I'm wavering but no going back!
Timothy (DM)
A barrel of pitch is aflame before you. You hear the crackling of fire as we return back upstairs. [laughs]
Ellie (Xocatl)
I think pitch also burn slowly.
Timothy (DM)
Sure, yeah.
Jen (Lenore)
[logically] Boats don't. [Jen and Tim laugh] Boats are wood; that burns fast!
Ellie (Xocatl)
Well, fact!
Timothy (DM)
They're not exploding, so they're not exploding.
Ellie (Xocatl)
[rethinking his choice] Yeah, it'll... Yeah.
Timothy (DM)
So, there's a fire, a... Blaze may be a strong word?
Ellie (Xocatl)
A flickering taking hold?
Timothy (DM)
Yeah, so a flame takes hold of the pitch [sensually] as you feel the warmth on your skin.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Mmm, that's nice.
Timothy (DM)
It is kind of nice; it's a chilly night...um. [Jen and Tim laugh]
Jen (Lenore)
Oh nice.
Timothy (DM)
All right. So, back to the two up stairs: you have these crew members, one enthralled who again is going to try to make a slash at their compatriots, this time making contact with their skin; while the others charge towards you, trying to throw you off this ship with their force. What are your ACs?
Jen (Lenore)
Mine is 13.
Chris (Sal)
16.
Timothy (DM)
Okay, so Salvador, you are slammed up against the side of the ship.
Jen (Lenore)
Again.
Chris (Sal)
I'm sensing a recurring theme.
Timothy (DM)
And the force behind this slam is IMMENSE as they start to crush into your ribs. You take 8 bludgeoning damage.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Oofa-doofa.
Chris (Sal)
Whenever that happens. I want to use a feature called Wrath of Storm, and it has to do a Dexterity saving throw.
Timothy (DM)
All right, 16.
Chris (Sal)
Okay, I think that passes, so it's going to take half damage, and that is... it takes ONE thunder damage, but I'm going to use Channel Divinity: anytime... so I can use Channel Divinity... anytime I roll lightning or thunder damage, I can make it roll max damage. So, it takes 8 thunder damage instead.
Timothy (DM)
All right, and how does this thunder damage happen? Is it just like a bolt of lightning from the sky?
Timothy (DM)
Alright, so the bolt of lightning smites them down as you see the electricity traveling through their body. Lenore is able to sidestep the other as it bashes into the side of the ship, and the final two crew members turn towards each other as the one defends itself from its enthralled compatriot
Chris (Sal)
Yeah, I say "OWWWWW!" and a... and a bolt comes, and it smites him right there.
Jen (Lenore)
Okay so I'm gonna break concentration on Crown of Thorns, and I'm gonna cast Shatter on these two who are there so they have to make a Con save, yeah.
Timothy (DM)
A 4 and a 6.
Jen (Lenore)
They both looooose
Timothy (DM)
Looooozaaaas!
Jen (Lenore)
3d8...
Ellie (Xocatl)
They need the L hat.
Timothy (DM)
They need the L hat. [Chris laughs]
Ellie (Xocatl)
But in a loserly way, not in a leaderly way 'cause they're losing, not leading! [Tim laughs]
Jen (Lenore)
Oh my god; that is 28 damage each. [awed "Whoa" from Chris]
Ellie (Xocatl)
What the hell, Lenore?
Timothy (DM)
Okay, how does Shatter END these beings?
Jen (Lenore)
Um, so Shatter, I believe is, yeah, it's thunder damage. It's a really.... but it's a big noise, so maybe their, like, heads explode? [all laugh] But, their ears start to bleed and then their heads explode.
Timothy (DM)
All right, so you drop your Crown of Thorns, you say your incantation, wave your arms, and you all kind of hear a rumbling in the air, and then *splat*; both of their heads explode, brain matter and blood goes EVERYWHERE. You hear it splashing into the water below.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Lenore's like "Oh my god! Oh, I'm sorryyyyy!" [suddenly realizing] Those are my employees!
Jen (Lenore)
I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!
Ellie (Xocatl)
No, I don't know what's going on.
Chris (Sal)
Well, now that this brute has got me pinned to the... pinned to the side of the boat, I'm going to cast Inflict Wounds on him... them. That's going to be a 22 to hit.
Timothy (DM)
Oh, that will hit.
Chris (Sal)
And that's going to be 3d10 damage.
Timothy (DM)
[awed] Y'all are powerful, which is great. [laughs] I have 20 to 30 of them to work with, so! [Jen and Ellie laugh]
Jen (Lenore)
That's 20 points of necrotic damage, right to the face! As I reach my face over their face and I say--
Timothy (DM)
Ok, so how--
Jen (Lenore)
[airhorns] *ber-ber-ber-berrrr*
Ellie (Xocatl)
Your face over their face? Are you kissing them?!?
Chris (Sal)
[backpedalling] My hand over..., oh my--! [laughs]
Jen (Lenore)
You put your face on their face, and then they DIE! [Chris laughs]
Jen (Lenore)
The face just ages really quick. [laughs]
Timothy (DM)
So how does... how do these wounds kill them? Like, what is going on?
Chris (Sal)
I stick my palm out over their face, and you can see that sort of like... like a black spread of cracks is sort of, like, penetrates their flesh and is opened up into wounds, I suppose.
Timothy (DM)
Oh gosh. Okay, so the black tendrils reach out, their skin starts to split, blood starts pouring out, and they collapse to the floor in front of you.
Jen (Lenore)
[seasick voice] Could you... could you not do that one again, please?
Timothy (DM)
[laughing] Says the girl who just BURST heads open.
Jen (Lenore)
She's, like, trying not to puke. [all laugh]
Chris (Sal)
I'll make sure to use a less, uh... a more SUBTLE attack next time. [to Ellie] Oh yes, sorry; this card is new to me. [Editor's Note: this was a physical card passed around to denote who was next in initiative order]
Timothy (DM)
All right, back downstairs, we have Xocatl over flaming pitch.
Jen (Lenore)
You can probably put that out now. [laughs]
Ellie (Xocatl)
I don't know that!
Chris (Sal)
Yeah, you don't know.
Ellie (Xocatl)
--I'm down here solving problems. I'm sure you guys are just pissing yourselves up there. [Tim laughs] You guys must be SO thankful you have ME [Tim laughs] to solve problems for you. I am going to whip out my flails, which... I don't know, you guys know what flails are? Spiky ball on a chain on a stick? Yeah, I'm gonna go to the back wall and start wailing on it and try to break through, so that I can see what the hell this light is 'cause there's not supposed to be anything back... this is my boat (my family's boat). There's not supposed to be ANYTHING back here... I don't think as far as I know.
Timothy (DM)
Yeah, make as many damage attacks. You automatically hit because it's the wall.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Okay, perf.
Timothy (DM)
--as many damage rolls as you can put out in a single turn.
Jen (Lenore)
[anime battle announce voice] "The wall steps out of the way of your attack." [Tim and Ellie laugh]
Ellie (Xocatl)
Okay, I think I get to do things... well, so I have Two Weapon Fighting, so I guess I can attack twice (once with my action, once with my bonus action) but I'm allowed to add my ability modifier because I have a two weapon fighting style with my bonus action.
Timothy (DM)
Yeah, perfeeeeeeect.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Just to make sure that I'm getting all the... good and all the "goods-goods" that I deserve.
Jen (Lenore)
Hell yeah, goods good.
Ellie (Xocatl)
So, I don't have to make an attack roll 'cause it hits.
Timothy (DM)
Correct, so just roll damage.
Jen (Lenore)
Kill that wall, Ellie!
Timothy (DM)
I don't know if you're allowed to do that. I think that objects have AC's for some reason. I don't... know.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Eh, whatever. It's fine. It's LITERALLY a wall. I'm in front of a wall.
Jen (Lenore)
It's a wall with cracks in it already, so...
Ellie (Xocatl)
Okay, so--
Jen (Lenore)
--made of wood.
Ellie (Xocatl)
18 points of bludgeoning damage.
Timothy (DM)
Ohhhh yeah. So, you just start flailing with your flails on this wall that's not moving--
Ellie (Xocatl)
I feel like I look cool
Timothy (DM)
--it starts ripping apart the boards the ship--
Jen (Lenore)
[mock buzzkill] It actually has 30 HP, though...
Timothy (DM)
--and you...So, you start ripping apart the the boards of the ship, and you start hearing footsteps above you, all collectively running towards the stairs.
Ellie (Xocatl)
[shrugging shoulders] This was kind of my plan.
Timothy (DM)
As you rip away the wall, you see the source of the glow: a pale green heart pulses in the back of the ship emitting a faint green glow.
Ellie (Xocatl)
[wagging finger] Deardraaaa. [laughs]
Jen (Lenore)
[unhappy father voice] Deardraaaa.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Oh, you old... you old bastard!
Jen (Lenore)
The lich ship? [Tim and Jen laugh]
Ellie (Xocatl)
Yeah, well, now... I don't know about this. I'm done... for right now.
Timothy (DM)
All right, you'll know what to do in just a moment!
Ellie (Xocatl)
All right, I'm gonna find out I suspect. How's my pitch fire doing?
Timothy (DM)
Your pitch fire is running. It is... you see the flicker of flames.
Ellie (Xocatl)
"I'MMM leading!" [Tim laughs] I think to myself. [Jen and Chris laugh]
Timothy (DM)
And I'm gonna have to ask you to make a Constitution saving throw, Xocatl.
Ellie (Xocatl)
That's fine. My Constitution's pretty good. That's an 18.
Timothy (DM)
All right. As you break through the wood, you see this pulsing green heart about the size of your head beating in the back of the ship, glowing green. A ray of energy shoots out from it and hits you square in the chest [Ellie *ooofs*] [dramatic pause] for 3 necrotic damage. [all laugh]
Ellie (Xocatl)
[astonished by her luck] You rolled three times!!!
Timothy (DM)
Yes, it was 3d6, but you saved so... half.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Great.
Jen (Lenore)
Still, that's a WHACK 3d6 roll. [laughs] A-a 6?
Timothy (DM)
A 7, but you round down.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Great. I really... I, like, brace myself for it, and then I'm, like, "Oh, actually, that wasn't that bad." [Tim laughs]
Jen (Lenore)
That wasn't so bad.
Chris (Sal)
Just a little heartburn.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Yeah. Oh god.
Timothy (DM)
Upstairs, there's a bunch of crew members making their way down the stairs. There's only one left behind engaged with you all in combat. Again, they try to slash at Lenore. Oh my gosh, they're awful. Does a 14 hit though.
Jen (Lenore)
Yes.
Timothy (DM)
Okay. So, that's... that's... okay.
Ellie (Xocatl)
We didn't recruit them for their sort of fighting ability.
Timothy (DM)
So, they slash into Lenore for 4 slashing damage--
Jen (Lenore)
Owie! Oouch ow-owie!
Timothy (DM)
--the others are making their way down the stairs. You can hear them behind you, Xocatl.
Ellie (Xocatl)
"This was my plan! This was my plan." I keep telling myself "This was my plan!"
Timothy (DM)
And as they arrive, you see a glow of energy emitting from the heart, the whole room lights up in green light, and then you hear the collapse of bodies hitting the floor behind you.
Jen (Lenore)
Lenore is going to cast Guiding Bolt on this guy in front of her, just right in the face.
Timothy (DM)
On brand. [laughs]
Jen (Lenore)
Oof, that was almost a 6 but it was a 16 +... a 21 to hit.
Timothy (DM)
Mmhmm. Yeah, that will hit.
Jen (Lenore)
Cool. Great. I like warlocks; they are pretty good. That's 10 + 3. That's 13 radiant damage, and my next attack has a advantage.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Oooo.
Timothy (DM)
All right. So, you blast them with this guiding bolt, chunks of skin [Ellie wails] sloughs off their face--
Ellie (Xocatl)
Chunky time up there.
Timothy (DM)
They are... [laughs] they are not having a good time. They are kind of teetering back and forth.
Jen (Lenore)
"I use my bonus action to kick them in the shin." [laughs]
Timothy (DM)
--the cusp of death.
Chris (Sal)
You got this all handled, Lenore?
Jen (Lenore)
What?!? [Jen and Tim laugh]
Chris (Sal)
I'm thinking, you know our friend, Xocalt? There's, like, 16 other guys on the ship!
Jen (Lenore)
[trembly] Okay, I'm a child, but alright, you can leave me here. That's fine.
Chris (Sal)
I point to the three bod-- to the TWO bodies that you've just bloodied on the ground.
Chris (Sal)
And I say...I do... I do quick pep talk. I get down to your eye level and I say--
Jen (Lenore)
*ah-uh-ah-uh*
Jen (Lenore)
While this guy is, like, right in front of me, like-like holding his face-- [laughs]
Chris (Sal)
I push his face... I push his face out of the way. [all laugh]
Jen (Lenore)
Put a hand on my... the other hand's on my shoulder.
Ellie (Xocatl)
"Just. Listen."
Chris (Sal)
Lenore, you know you have this. You're so powerful. Look what you've done already. You've gone into the depths of the earth. You've dealt with some... shards, and you've seen... all sorts of things! And I know you can do this.
Jen (Lenore)
[tearfully] Okay, thank you for making me believe in myself.
Chris (Sal)
And I cast Guidance on Lenore--
Jen (Lenore)
Thank you!
Chris (Sal)
So, you have a d4 to your next roll.
Timothy (DM)
All right. So, you've got an advantage on your next roll, you've got an extra d4!
Ellie (Xocatl)
And this dude's on the verge of death! Yeah,
Chris (Sal)
I go downstairs... or I start to head downstairs.
Timothy (DM)
All right. So, Salvador starts running towards the stairs. You see at the bottom of the stairs: a bunch of bodies on the ground.
Chris (Sal)
Oh, man!
Timothy (DM)
Just like a pile. The whole crew has collapsed onto the ground.
Jen (Lenore)
[psychically] Oh, he's gonna pretend he did that. He's gonna pretend that he killed all these guys by himself.
Chris (Sal)
I really underestimated Xocatl. [Tim and Jen laugh]
Timothy (DM)
This is as far as you get.
Chris (Sal)
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Yeah. So... So, the green heart flashed, all the bodies hit the floor.
Jen (Lenore)
[singing that one song] LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOR. LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOR. LET THE BODIES HIT THE. RRRWWAAA.
Ellie (Xocatl)
So, now I'm a little confused about whose side of this green heart is on because it did zap me but it also zapped all the...
Jen (Lenore)
[astute in the function of demon ships] Or it took all their strength for its own.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Well, so I look over my shoulder. I see all the bodies. I see... Salvador.
Timothy (DM)
At the top of the stairs.
Ellie (Xocatl)
[exactly as planned] Oh, I'm gonna tell him I did that. [Tim laughs] [thinking to himself] Sweet.
Jen (Lenore)
[in Xocatl's mind] Sweet. Cool. That'll be cool later. Keep that in my back pocket. [Ellie and Tim laugh]
Ellie (Xocatl)
If the heart is on our side, I don't want to antagonize it by attacking it, but it did zap me and there isn't a lot else to do--
Jen (Lenore)
It's almost definitely not on our side. [Jen and Tim laugh]
Ellie (Xocatl)
I feel like it--
Jen (Lenore)
I can almost guarantee that it's not--
Ellie (Xocatl)
This is my boat! This is my boat.
Jen (Lenore)
It's a lich boat... that ZAPPED you, and the whole crew turned on us!
Ellie (Xocatl)
But my... but my ancestor--
Jen (Lenore)
--is a lich boat.
Ellie (Xocatl)
It's a family argument. Okay, this is a disagreement--
Jen (Lenore)
--Know you know the truth, and the lich boat's mad about it.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Yeah, that's probably true. Okay! I'm going to--
Jen (Lenore)
--be like, "Hey, are you on our side?" [laughs]
Ellie (Xocatl)
--ready? I'm gonna... I'm trying to remember how this works: I'm gonna ready a Dodge action, so if the green heart tries to attack me again, I'm going to dodge.
Timothy (DM)
You're to dodge. [reading the rulebook] Until the start of your next turn, any attack made against you has disadvantage if you can see the attacker, and you make a Dexterity saving throw with advantage if you have to make like a AOE dodge. [Editor's Note: AOE means Area of Effect]
Ellie (Xocatl)
Okay, well, so I'm going to dodge whatever that... whatever mechanic, whether that's a prepared action or whether I just do it on my turn and then procee-- like, propagates--
Timothy (DM)
Yeah, it just proceed. So, you just use all of the action that's in your--
Ellie (Xocatl)
Gettin' ready to wiggle. [Tim laughs]
Timothy (DM)
Just wiggle wiggle away?
Ellie (Xocatl)
Gettin' ready to wiggle. I'm loosenin' up and limbering up. Yeah, so I'm going to dodge and see.... Dodge and See.
Timothy (DM)
Dodge and see.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Dodge and see. That's my strat.
Timothy (DM)
[pause] Melora take the wheel-- no. [laughs] [Editor's Note: Melora is a god in D&D, and Timothy is making a reference to the 2005 smash hit by Carrie Underwood, "Jesus Take the Wheel"]
Ellie (Xocatl)
And it is for you, my dear DM. [Editor's Note: the "it" refers to the initiative card used to track initiative order]
Timothy (DM)
Oh, lovelyyyy. Well, you're dodging! So...
Ellie (Xocatl)
I'm dodging!
Timothy (DM)
You're dodgein'...
Ellie (Xocatl)
I'm loose! I'm limber! I'm doing that footy-steppy thing that football players do.
Jen (Lenore)
*step step step step step*
Timothy (DM)
Another ray shoots out from the heart. Make a Wisdom--
Ellie (Xocatl)
At me???
Timothy (DM)
At you. [Jen laughs]
Ellie (Xocatl)
Just checking.
Timothy (DM)
--at Xocatl. Make a Wisdom saving throw. [Ellie groans] You can do that with advantage; I don't really know how dodge helps you with Wisdom saves but it does in D&D, so we're doing it!
Jen (Lenore)
[skeptical] Mmm, does it? Does it?
Ellie (Xocatl)
I'm thinking... good because I need advantage. O-kay, that's a 19.
Timothy (DM)
A 19 will pass.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Amazing; I'm beginning to think this heart is NOT on our side
Jen (Lenore)
[looking to the heavens] Oh my god. Unbelievable. Incredible.
Timothy (DM)
Beginning???
Ellie (Xocatl)
I'm beginning to think... you know once: could be a mistake--
Jen (Lenore)
Twice: maybe? [starting her turn] Okay, Lenore's just, like *concerned noises* and she casts--
Ellie (Xocatl)
[a bit peeved] C'mon, Lenore.
Jen (Lenore)
She casts Eldridge Blast at this guy. Once again, just right in the face. Just like "GET AWAY FROM ME!"
Ellie (Xocatl)
if you're trying to avoid chunks, yeah.
Chris (Sal)
You have advantage!
Timothy (DM)
And a d4.
Chris (Sal)
Well, I messed up because Guidance is for ability checks, not attack rolls.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Extra d4.
Timothy (DM)
Oh, oops.
Jen (Lenore)
That's still... it's a 17 to hit.
Timothy (DM)
17 will hit.
Jen (Lenore)
Ok, cool. That's a 1d10, which is this one, no, that's a 12.
Timothy (DM)
You just really wanted to impart your wisdom on this child.
Chris (Sal)
So, yeah, the next time they have to convince somebody of something, then they'll be good.
Jen (Lenore)
That's, um, 2 damage.
Timothy (DM)
2 damage?
Jen (Lenore)
Yeah, is that enough?
Ellie (Xocatl)
I hope that does it.
Jen (Lenore)
[Tim sighs] He has 1 damage... he has 1 HP left. [Ellie laughs]
Ellie (Xocatl)
He has 1 HP.
Timothy (DM)
Oh my god, that's sooo funny.
Jen (Lenore)
Oh my godddddd-uh.
Timothy (DM)
So petty, oh my gosh, he's rocking back and forth.
Jen (Lenore)
Oh my god, I blow on him.
Timothy (DM)
His blood is, like, GUSHING out of the wounds on his face. He can barely hold a scimitar.
Chris (Sal)
So, I see the heart now?
Timothy (DM)
Yeah, so you see Xocatl standing in front of a wall that they have ripped apart, and behind it is a floating pulsing green glowing heart.
Chris (Sal)
[practicing his stand-up routine] What's the deal with this? [Jen and Tim laugh]
Ellie (Xocatl)
Well, I know you find may find this hard to believe, but I killed all those guys. That's what you're asking about, right?
Chris (Sal)
Yes, aside--
Jen (Lenore)
You're just gonna believe it? Roll Insight, c'mon! [Ellie laughs]
Chris (Sal)
Can I do an Insight check?
Jen (Lenore)
Roll Insight! [to Chris] At least roll Insight, [to Ellie] you roll Deception!
Ellie (Xocatl)
It's a deception. 12?
Chris (Sal)
That's a 20. Dirty 20. [Jen and Tim laugh]
Ellie (Xocatl)
Oh my godddd. You're so insightfulllll! Can I switch it to Intimidation? [laughs] "I DID IT" [all laugh] No, that's fine. Anyway... so I killed all these guys. [Tim laughs]
Chris (Sal)
[ever the supportive friend, thumbs-up] Good job.
Ellie (Xocatl)
[like 2nd grade show-and-tell] And look at my pitch fire.
Chris (Sal)
That-that's good too.
Jen (Lenore)
No, it's not. It's really bad and we should put that out--
Chris (Sal)
This green heart is NOT on our side.
Jen (Lenore)
--we should definitely put the fire out as, like, soon as possible before the fucking boat catches. Oh my god! I'm very stressed out about the fire.
Ellie (Xocatl)
You don't know about the fire.
Jen (Lenore)
No, JEN is stressed out about the fire. Lenore's stressed out about the man I'm trying to kill her [laughs] and exploding people's heads. She's new to that.
Chris (Sal)
Can I cast Inflict Wounds on this heart?
Timothy (DM)
Yes, you may.
Jen (Lenore)
You love some Inflict Wounds. Fuck yeahhhhh.
Chris (Sal)
Oh, dang. I hope it being a boat doesn't have any "weird" effects on, um...
Timothy (DM)
--its ability to float, or...? [laughs]
Chris (Sal)
No, on it's ability... it's like, oh, um, I don't know. I don't know where I was going with that sentence. I thought it might be like an "un-lich-y" thing. So, I have to do a melee attack on it.
Jen (Lenore)
[teen girl voice] That's not a very litchy thing to do.
Chris (Sal)
Dang, I'm not rolling very well. That's only a 9.
Ellie (Xocatl)
[slightly bitter] You rolled well on your Insight check. [laughs]
Chris (Sal)
Yeah, man, I wish that would have worked.
Timothy (DM)
A 9 does not do it.
Chris (Sal)
But I will stand in front of Xocatl.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Oh, I'm dodging.
Chris (Sal)
Oh!
Ellie (Xocatl)
It's really not necessary but..
Chris (Sal)
I will stand beside... I will stand behind Xocatl.
Ellie (Xocatl)
I mean, you can stand in front of me, but I'm just [imitates dodging motions]
Chris (Sal)
Yeah, you're dod--I,uh, I give you, like, cover, but now I'll be standing beside.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Okay.... Oh my god, I love the character arc of, like, you were our leader, and now we're all equals because we're taking on more of a leadership role.
Chris (Sal)
[rubbing his hands together] It's all part of the plan!
Ellie (Xocatl)
Side by side. No one in front, no one behind: side by side. All right, I'm gonna attack it with my flails. *flailing sounds*
Timothy (DM)
All right, make those attach rolls.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Okay, greatttt. So, I roll... I'm going to do this thing that's supposed to save time. [sudden reversal] No, I'm not. I'm gonna waste time.[Tim laughs] I'm wasting time! Okay, that is a 17 and a 6 to hit.
Timothy (DM)
The 17 will hit.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Ok, and that is 9 points of bludgeoning damage as I make contact with my flail.
Timothy (DM)
Yes, you bash into the heart with the flail. As you pull it back out, you see a viscous green blood dripping from the heart.
Ellie (Xocatl)
*YECH*
Jen (Lenore)
Yuckyyyy.
Ellie (Xocatl)
I'm upset by the thought that this might have been on my boat the whole time. [Tim laughs]
Jen (Lenore)
Oh, it almost definitely was. [laughs]
Timothy (DM)
You never noticed it, why would you--?
Ellie (Xocatl)
This is some Tell-Tale Heart shit, y'know, like? [Tim and Jen laugh] Ugh, it almost certainly was. I ate eggs benedict RIGHT over there. [points to corner]
Jen (Lenore)
Oh noooooo! Nooo! What if it had some green goo in that eggs benny, and you didn't even knoooow? [Ellie laughs, Tim "oh noos"] Ewwww-ah.
Chris (Sal)
[trying to think of a pun] Green eggs and...
Ellie (Xocatl)
Benny. [Chris laughs]
Timothy (DM)
So again, a ray of light is going to shoot out of the heart, and it is going to (this time) hit Salvador.
Jen (Lenore)
*Bum-bum-bum* [Tim rolls so many dice] Uh-oh, don't love the faces that are going on. Uh-ohhh!
Ellie (Xocatl)
What happens if Salvador dies in the prologue? [Jen and Tim laugh]
Timothy (DM)
Okay, so Salvador, the ray of light hits you in the chest, you take 6 necrotic damage and must make a Constitution saving throw.
Chris (Sal)
Don't fail me nowwwww! Bad rolllllls! Oh my gosh!
Jen (Lenore)
Damn, dude.
Chris (Sal)
[utterly desolated] That's a 3.
Timothy (DM)
You feel your life force draining from your body, and you feel weakened by it as your max hit points is reduced by 6.
Chris (Sal)
Okay, just as a background, the first battle that me and Tim ever did, I get one shotted, so this is... [Jen: "wow"] this is a markedly, uh, "improved" situation.
Jen (Lenore)
Incredible.
Timothy (DM)
Yes. [laughs]
Chris (Sal)
Like, the first ROUND.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Wow, that's brutal. You didn't even get a turn?
Chris (Sal)
Nope!
Timothy (DM)
[so contrite] Nope. [laughs] Sorrrrrrry.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Oops!
Jen (Lenore)
Alright, we're doing another [southern drawl] Eldritch Blast. A 14?
Timothy (DM)
A 14... a 14 will hit. They just have leather armor on.
Jen (Lenore)
He's dead. Okay, great. I will Eldritch Blast him in the face.
Timothy (DM)
Y'don't even need a roll for damage (they have one hit point) and you BLAST them in the face, their body flings backwards, crumbles to the floor.
Jen (Lenore)
I scream a little and then run downstairs towards where the other guys are.
Timothy (DM)
You run down the stairs. You see the PILE of bodies--
Jen (Lenore)
Oh my God.
Ellie (Xocatl)
[lying] I killed all these guys.
Timothy (DM)
[laughing] --you see Salvador, you see Xocatl, you see the glowing heart--
Jen (Lenore)
Roll Deception.
Timothy (DM)
[laughing] --you're rolling Insight against a Deception as Xocatl attempts to lie yet again.
Ellie (Xocatl)
4.
Jen (Lenore)
9! [she and Chris laugh]
Ellie (Xocatl)
Neither you believe meeee!
Jen (Lenore)
I go... I go "Sure you did." [Tim laughs]
Ellie (Xocatl)
[to himself] Man...
Chris (Sal)
On the heart's turn, it had to do a Dexterity saving throw because it hit me.
Timothy (DM)
What happens if it doesn't have a speed? [laughs]
Chris (Sal)
Well, it has a Dexterity skill...
Timothy (DM)
It technically does, but I'm wondering if it shouldn't.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Because how would it move at all?
Timothy (DM)
'Cause I made this monster, so I might have not thought about that.
Ellie (Xocatl)
You're allowed to change the rule.
Timothy (DM)
I'm gonna say that it automatically fails the Dex save because it cannot move; it is embedded in the ship.
Chris (Sal)
So, it takes 10 points of lightning damage as I scream as I get hit and I say "AAAAAAHHH!", and a bolt of lightning comes in through the side of the ship [Jen and Tim laugh] and it defib--
Jen (Lenore)
[laughing] Like a cartoon! It just, like, comes from wherever.
Timothy (DM)
A bolt of light shoots in through a porthole and hits the heart square-on through the hole in the wall.
Chris (Sal)
It defibrillates it. It goes *BZZRRZZRRZZRRZA*
Timothy (DM)
You see the static bursts all around it.
Chris (Sal)
And now I'm gonna attack it.
Timothy (DM)
And then you go attack it. [laughs]
Chris (Sal)
I'm just going to attack it with my battleaxe, and that's going to be a 6. Man, not the day for dice rolls.
Timothy (DM)
A 6 is deflected by a mysterious arcane energy, shielding it from your attacks.
Jen (Lenore)
*Bum-bum-BUUUM*
Ellie (Xocatl)
Uhhh, how's my pitch fire doing?
Timothy (DM)
It's slowly burning in the background.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Great. All right. [Tim laughs]
Jen (Lenore)
I have no water spell, so...
Ellie (Xocatl)
That's fine.
Jen (Lenore)
No, it's not. No it's not.
Timothy (DM)
You're lucky there were no curtains in the vicinity of the pitch. [Chris laughs]
Jen (Lenore)
Honestly.
Timothy (DM)
--because your crew (very well-trained) would not put curtains above pitch.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Yeah, yeah. Also there are no curtains on this boat.
Timothy (DM)
[laughing] Yeah, also that.
Jen (Lenore)
Except in your room.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Right. I... but I brought my own, and I hung those up.
Timothy (DM)
You do notice that a black smoke is trying to collect along the ceiling of the room.
Jen (Lenore)
Uh oh. Uh oh. Oopsy!
Ellie (Xocatl)
I just quickly Googled like pitch to learn more about how it burns very quickly, and that smoke (let me tell you) is, like, carcinogenic. Yeah, just FYI.
Timothy (DM)
Yeah. Smells awful.
Chris (Sal)
Well, there's a porthole open, so...!
Ellie (Xocatl)
That's true, yeah.
Timothy (DM)
Pretty soon y'all are gonna be coughin'--
Jen (Lenore)
Won't be able to think
Timothy (DM)
--hackin' up a lung.
Ellie (Xocatl)
But in the meantime, I'm going to do my little flail... double flail on the heart. Classic. If it ain't broke, don't fix it. Okay. That is a 12 to hit, and a 13 to hit.
Timothy (DM)
It deflects both of your attacks.
Ellie (Xocatl)
UnbeliEEEEvable. Wow. Well, I feel a little ashamed because I know my friends don't believe me... (well, friends is maybe a generous term) I know my comrades... (Compatriots? Acquaintances...) don't believe that I killed all those guys and then I just, like, totally whiffed on that.
Timothy (DM)
So did Sal.
Ellie (Xocatl)
[doubtfully] Yeah... but I'm wondering if maybe I don't deserve the leader hat.
Jen (Lenore)
[sing-songy] I don't knoooww.
Timothy (DM)
[laughing] Ohoho, nooo.
Chris (Sal)
It's now for Lenore!
Jen (Lenore)
Lenore's about to snatch that leader hat off of your head.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Yeah, Lenore's really taking the leadership role here.
Timothy (DM)
[wildlife documentary narrator voice] "And in the middle of battle, Xocatl goes into Existential Crises mode [all laugh] and forgets what he's doing."
Jen (Lenore)
[wildlife documentary narrator voice] "Lenore is covered in blood and guts." [Tim laughs]
Ellie (Xocatl)
Leadership potential!
Jen (Lenore)
"--with a wild look in her eyes."
Timothy (DM)
All right. So, now, another bolt of light is going to shoot out of the heart. What is your AC, Lenore? 13? Okay, it hits you--
Jen (Lenore)
Owie.
Timothy (DM)
--in the side of the head.
Jen (Lenore)
Oh fuck!
Ellie (Xocatl)
It just did.
Timothy (DM)
--for 4 necrotic damage, and you also must make a Concentration saving throw.
Jen (Lenore)
Where's my d4? [crestfallen] That's a 4, so no, I do not save.
Timothy (DM)
So, your max hit points are reduced by 4 as you feel your life force draining your body and yourself weakening.
Jen (Lenore)
Mmhm, mhmm. Lenore is going to cast Guiding Bolt on the Bad Green Heart lady. [fumbles dice] I mean, I rolled a 19, so that's pretty cool. Can I just keep that even though it wasn't on the table? Okay, so that-that hit-hits I presumes.
Timothy (DM)
Yeah, 19 hits.
Jen (Lenore)
Okay, so that's... "Guiding Bolt, 4d6." Love that for me. 5 so that's 12 radiant damage, and my next attack has advantage, and then with my bonus action, I'm going to try to put out this fire [laughs] with like one of the... dudes', like, cloaks. One of the dead guys, I just take his cloak and try to smother the flames.
Timothy (DM)
Alright, so you shoot a bolt at the heart, it makes impact. You grab a cloak. You start fanning and trying to smother out the flaming pitch. You start coughing as the smoke gets into your lungs; make a Constitution save.
Jen (Lenore)
A natural 20.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Whoooa. You do have good lungs. Powerful... child lungs?
Timothy (DM)
Alright, and you are able to hold back the tears that well in your eyes as the pitch burns your lungs.
Jen (Lenore)
Very cool.
Ellie (Xocatl)
[nodding sagely] This was my plan.
Jen (Lenore)
[laughing] To give this child cancer.
Timothy (DM)
Nobody lives that long. [laughs]
Ellie (Xocatl)
I'm going to start a nonprofit in your name...
Jen (Lenore)
Wow. Thank you, it means a lot--
Ellie (Xocatl)
--as a front.
Jen (Lenore)
Oh my god
Ellie (Xocatl)
--for money laundering operation. [Jen and Tim laugh]
Timothy (DM)
Alright, Salvador.
Chris (Sal)
Yeah, I am going to try to continue to attack this thing. How many pitches did you light on fire?
Ellie (Xocatl)
Just the one.
Chris (Sal)
Just the one?
Ellie (Xocatl)
Yeah. One barrel.
Chris (Sal)
So, how big is this barrel?
Timothy (DM)
[laughing] Barrel size? How big is a barrel? It's, uh--
Chris (Sal)
Size of a human.
Timothy (DM)
--three or four feet tall. Maybe two feet in diameter.
Chris (Sal)
And this thing's probably got to weigh a ton.
Timothy (DM)
Yeah, it's full of pitch. It's very heavy.
Ellie (Xocatl)
You can roll it.
Timothy (DM)
Yeah, they usually roll these onto the ship.
Chris (Sal)
Is there, like, a lid that we could put over top of it? I know you're smothering it with a cloak.
Timothy (DM)
Yeah, there is a lid to the side of it that Xocatl would have had to remove to light it on.
Chris (Sal)
I don't want to spread pitch. I don't know how to get it out otherwise... I'm going to keep that in my mind, but I'm going to attack this thing again, and I hope to God that I can hit it.
Timothy (DM)
You hope to... Tao. Wait, what's... what is your guy's name?
Chris (Sal)
What's-it, I forget the name of the...
Ellie (Xocatl)
Aren't you a cleric?
Chris (Sal)
Tao, yes. Yeah, the storm god.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Oooh.
Jen (Lenore)
Cool.
Chris (Sal)
But yeah, let's see how this goooooes. Yes! That's a 17 to hit it
Timothy (DM)
A 17 will hit.
Chris (Sal)
That's gonna be a bunch of damAAAAGE, but it takes 11 points of necrotic damage.
Timothy (DM)
And with your attack, the heart shrivels, the glow of the light dims until the three of you stand in a torch-lit room amongst the bodies of your crew members and the debris of the wall.
Ellie (Xocatl)
And the smoking barrel pitch.
Timothy (DM)
And the smoking barrle of pitch [laughs]. That's right.
Ellie (Xocatl)
*cough cough cough*
Timothy (DM)
As you see Lenore battling this barrel of pitch, smothering it with a cloak. Eventually, it also goes out... as she coughs up a storm. [laughs]
Jen (Lenore)
And she's like, "I-- three! I killed three people."
Ellie (Xocatl)
[putting a hand on Lenore's shoulder] Well, they weren't people. Let's go up. [Ellie and Chris laugh]
Timothy (DM)
And you make your way up to the deck of the ship. You stand under the starry night in utter silence across the surface of the ocean.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Where's the island? Is the island still there?
Timothy (DM)
The island is still there. Just a ways away, and you think to yourself, "Damn, it is going to be VERY difficult to navigate a ship this size back to fucking Terra Vas." [laughs]
Ellie (Xocatl)
With just three of us.
Timothy (DM)
WIth three crew.
Jen (Lenore)
Oh, no. We're gonna have to learn to work, I guess. [Chris laughs]
Ellie (Xocatl)
Oh my gosh. Yeah.
Chris (Sal)
This is team building.
Jen (Lenore)
It's gonna be a learning experience for everyone
Ellie (Xocatl)
I do know a little bit about sailing boats. So...
Jen (Lenore)
I don't; I'm a child.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Yeah, I know. [Tim laughs] Fortunately, you take direction very well.
Jen (Lenore)
Oh my god. Thank you. I can murder real good, apparently.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Yeah, APPARENTLY. I think we could probably do something with that. [all laugh]
Jen (Lenore)
Lenore hands you the rose that she picked--
Ellie (Xocatl)
[rosy cheeked] Ohhhh
Jen (Lenore)
--in the crypt, and she's like [demurely] "It was nice meeting you."
Ellie (Xocatl)
I take the leader hat off of my head and put it on yours ands say "You deserve this more than I do. You were a real leader in... murdering the hell out of my employees." [Chris laughs]
Jen (Lenore)
[tearfully] "Thank you." and Lenore's crying.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Xocatl starts tearing up a little bit too, but is, like, looking up, away. "Huh, ugh, the moon, like, ooo"
Timothy (DM)
Blinking profusely.
Jen (Lenore)
Yeah, a lot of blinking is happening.
Ellie (Xocatl)
It was just the smoke. It's, like, a lot of smoke down there.
Jen (Lenore)
It's all the smoke. Oh, I KNOW.
Ellie (Xocatl)
And the fire. But the pitch fire was a good idea, right guys?
Chris (Sal)
[looking at Lenore] Ehhhhhhh.
Jen (Lenore)
In theory, in theory, yes! In theory.
Chris (Sal)
Yes, if all those bodies hadn't died, yes, I think it would have been a wonder--
Ellie (Xocatl)
I killed all those guys.
Chris (Sal)
Yes, you-you did
Jen (Lenore)
Yes, you diiiid. Sure you did.
Ellie (Xocatl)
And we're all gonna go back, and it's gonna be so great.
Jen (Lenore)
Yeah, and then my grandma will die, and we'll stop making deals with demons, presumably. That'll be cool.
Ellie (Xocatl)
And I'm going to take more of an active role in the running of my family business instead of sitting back and letting my mom stomp all over me.
Jen (Lenore)
Good for you.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Yeah.
Jen (Lenore)
Proud of you, man.
Chris (Sal)
Takes initiative, yeah.
Ellie (Xocatl)
And we'll be buddies forever,
Jen (Lenore)
[singing] Buddies for-evah
Ellie (Xocatl)
--and someday when we die, we'll be reincarnated as a weird combo lich! [all laugh] All smushed together in a weird way!
Timothy (DM)
A weird combo lich!
Chris (Sal)
It'll be the ten-foot creature that was there before.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Oh my god, YEAH!
Jen (Lenore)
It'll be a third orc? A quarter orc?
Chris (Sal)
A sixth? Yeah, a quarter. Yeah, you'd be a quarter orc.
Jen (Lenore)
If I'm full human, and you're half human. Three quarters. Yeah, one quarter orc lich is what we'll be.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Right.
Chris (Sal)
A few days after we've got back to... back to town, and you have gone your.. to your separate estates. Xocatl gets a present in the mail.
Ellie (Xocatl)
*gasp* I open it extremely enthusiastically. This is either some sort of terrible poison from an enemy or some sort of raunchy gift from a lover, and I can't wait to find out which! [Jen laughs] I tear it open.
Chris (Sal)
It is a hat with an L and a little note on an envelope on top of it.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Well, I open the envelope!
Chris (Sal)
You open up the envelope. It's a letter from Salvador, and it's a sketch of the three of you standing on the bow of the ship. And you're all wearing L hats.
Jen (Lenore)
How good is the sketch? [all laugh]
Chris (Sal)
Please! I-I
Jen (Lenore)
[laughs] The one good roll, come on!
Chris (Sal)
Well, as.. as it's been established in other things, Salvador sketches, like, in his downtime, so I really hope this goes well.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Oh, he's a good artist. I feel like you should have advantage then.
Chris (Sal)
That's a 14. Do I get to add anything to it?
Timothy (DM)
You have proficiency. Your proficiency then.
Chris (Sal)
Ok, so that's a 16.
Jen (Lenore)
So, it's a really decent sketch.
Timothy (DM)
It's a really decent sketch. Yeah, it's a really decent sketch. And even for your standards, it's decent. It's like a good good standard.
Chris (Sal)
[thanking the dice gods for this blessing] Yesss.
Ellie (Xocatl)
Yeah. Xocatl's tearing up, and he holds the hat to his chest whispers under his breath "Everybody likes me."
Jen (Lenore)
Awww. Very nice.
Ellie (Xocatl)
And he puts it on. [laughs] And looks in the mirror and makes, like, a face like "Mmmm, yeah. Get it!" ...and the end, I guess? The End.
Jen (Lenore)
[singing] Theee Ennnnd
Ellie (Xocatl)
[all player harmonizing] The End!
Timothy (DM)
And that is where this chapter of Shadows of Prophecy comes to a close. Thank you for joining us through the darkness and continue the story next time for a thrilling new adventure.
Timothy (DM)
Shout out to my brother, known as the chill electronic vapor soul artist, LUSQ, for writing our chillingly epic theme song; editing by Scrubcast; and a big shout out to Syrinscape for some amazing atmosphere and music. Make sure to check them out @syrinscape.com. I always use them at my game table, and it really does add that little something special to bring your players into the story. Also, please follow us on Twitter @ShadowsProphecy and Instagram @shadows_of_prophecy. And show us some support by becoming one of our fabulous patrons at patreon.com/shadowsofprophecy, where you can get access to bonus content like handouts, encounter maps, and even adventure guides to run your own horrific campaigns or one-shots. And at the very least, give us a five star review on your podcast platform of choice. This is how we get the word out about our podcast, and we love sharing it with you all. Thank you, and tune in next time for more tales of dread and despair at Shadows of Prophecy.