Want Children to Find Their Inner Leader? Do This...

In part one of my S5E34 @schoolutionspodcast conversation, Muriel Summers of Leader in Me offers life advice and highlights the significant impact of entrusting children with real responsibility. This practice is a powerful, yet often underestimated, tool in child development. Summers, with extensive experience, offers valuable teaching and parenting tips, encouraging a positive parenting approach that fosters growth and confidence in children.

Muriel shares the story of how Oprah Winfrey's third-grade teacher changed her trajectory with a single, small act of trust. She breaks down the difference between handing a child a task versus genuinely entrusting them with responsibility and why that distinction is everything when it comes to student motivation, classroom belonging, and school culture.

We also dig into equity in education because when there's no system in place, the same children keep getting chosen. Muriel explains how instructional leadership and intentional classroom structures ensure every child, not just the confident or compliant ones, gets to feel what it's like to be believed in.

🎧 WHAT YOU'LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE:
- Why entrusting kids with responsibility is different from assigning tasks — and why students feel the difference
- How low expectations are the most dangerous thing in a classroom (and what to do instead)
- Why equity in the classroom requires a deliberate system, not good intentions
- How school culture shifts when every child gets a meaningful role
- What Leader in Me schools are doing globally to build inclusive classrooms and family partnerships
- Why discomfort is actually the whole point of empowered learning (preview for Part 2!)

Some Episode Mentions:
➡️Leader in Me 

➡️A.B. Combs Magnet Elementary

➡️Teacher Believed in Me 

➡️The Leader in Me

📑 CHAPTERS
0:00 - Introduction: What Changes a Child's Trajectory?
1:00 - Meet Muriel Summers & Leader in Me
2:00 - The Foundation: 7 Habits & 43 Years in Education
3:30 - Task vs. Responsibility: What's the Difference?
5:00 - Oprah's Third-Grade Teacher & the Power of Trust
7:00 - Every Child Deserves to Feel Trusted
8:00 - Equity in the Classroom: Who Gets Chosen?
9:30 - Individual Gifts & the Good of the Whole Community
10:30 - Global Connections in Leader in Me Schools
11:30 - Lightning Round: Most Dangerous Thing a Teacher Can Do
12:30 - Classroom Roles That Sound Meaningful But Aren't
13:30 - "They're Just Not Ready" — Muriel's Response
14:30 - Preview: Part 2 on Empowering Student Ownership
15:00 - Olivia's 3 Key Takeaways & Call to Action

Join our community of educators committed to cultivating student success, inspired teaching, and creating inclusive classrooms with a pro-kid mindset focused on the whole child. 

🎧 New episodes every Monday & Friday with bite-sized Wednesday reel bonus content.
📧 Connect with me at https://www.oliviawahl.com/coaching-consulting if you’d like a thought partner to help you cultivate curious learners who advocate for what they believe in.
🎵 Music: Benjamin Wahl

#schoolutions #schoolutionspodcast #forevergettingbetter #curiositydriven #evidencebasedstrategies #classroomreadystrategies 

When coaches, teachers, administrators, and families work hand in hand, it fosters a school atmosphere where everyone is inspired and every student is fully engaged in their learning journey.

Transcript

Olivia: [00:00:00] What if the moment that changed a child's entire trajectory cost you nothing but a little trust? Muriel Summers has spent 43 years watching teachers do exactly that, and today she's unpacking why entrusting children with real responsibility is one of the most powerful and most underestimated tools we have. If you've ever wondered whether the small things you do actually matter, this conversation is for you.

This is Schoolutions, the podcast that extends education beyond the classroom. A show that isn't just theory, but practical try it tomorrow. Approaches for educators and caregivers to ensure every student finds their spark and receives the support they need to thrive.

I am Olivia Wahl, and I am blown away that I get to be in [00:01:00] conversation with the wonderful Muriel Summers. Let me tell you a little bit about Muriel. Muriel Summers has spent 43 years proving that every child is already a leader, they just need someone brave enough to believe it first. She is the co-creator of Leader in Me. It's a movement now living in over 7,000 schools across 70 countries. Our conversation today will focus on two chapters of Muriel's book written with David K. Hatch. I have it right here, Muriel. It's fantastic. Teacher Believed in Me. Welcome, welcome, welcome to the podcast. 

Muriel: Oh, Olivia, thank you so much for having me. I am so honored and I want to begin, uh, by saying the brilliance behind the book Teacher Believed in Me is Dr. David Hatch. Um, he has been behind every wonderful publication from. The leader in me, [00:02:00] um, which is co-authored by Dr. Stephen R. Covey, Sean Covey, David Hatch, and myself. But David is really, um, the brilliance behind this book. If I added anything to it, it was, um, some of my experience with children over my 43 years, um, in education. So I wanna give credit to where credit is due from the very beginning, but what an honor it is for us to celebrate this book with you. 

Olivia: Yeah, I'm honored to be able to uplift the work and, um, we're zooming in on two chapters that I felt like really talked to each other. I've read the book a few times now. Um, and I like to start every conversation by asking us who is a researcher or a nugget of research that really, um strikes your heart when it comes to this idea of believing in kids. 

Muriel: You know, there's so many great educational thought leaders and psychologists, [00:03:00] um, who have certainly influenced our work. So to pick one I think would be very difficult for me. We do go back, however, to the foundation of what The Leader in Me and Teacher Believed in Me is really built upon. And that is Dr. Stephen R Covey's work in the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. Uh, it the foundation of, um everything that I have done in education for the past 25 years. And so for that being said, it is, um, certainly the work that I lean into when I am working with students and with adults. 

Olivia: What's fascinating to me is chapter four really zooms in on the act of entrusting children with responsibility, where then chapter six zooms in on empowering children, uh, to really own their [00:04:00] learning journey. So part one, we're going to focus on the act of entrusting children with responsibility. Part two, the idea of empowering, which I know empowering can be a word that some people don't love these days. Um, and we can talk more about that. Let's start with what is the difference between giving a child a task and entrusting them with a responsibility because you frame those differently?

Muriel: Yeah. You know, giving a task is just that, giving them a task, um, in terms of entrusting them with responsibility, you almost see. Right before your eyes, something transformational happening. One of my favorite stories, um, is from Oprah Winfrey, and I think if I share this, perhaps it will, um, define the difference between the two. Oprah shares that her favorite teacher was someone named [00:05:00] Mrs. Duncan and it was her third grade teacher. And Mrs. Duncan gave her a task of putting cookies on the desk of her classmates before recess was over. Now, where the entrusting comes in, the task was putting the cookies on the desk. But what Oprah remembers most vividly about this, is she, she says that it was more than just giving me a cookie to put on a desk.

She trusted me to go into the classroom before anyone else was released to go in, and she gave me that responsibility. She trusted me, and she used those words repeatedly. So when Oprah confronts Ms. Duncan years later and invites her on her show, and this was like 10, 15 years ago, Ms. Duncan was taken [00:06:00] aback because she could not believe it was that small of an act that made all the difference in the world to over. And I think often teachers, we as teachers forget that sometimes the biggest things we do for children are in the smallest things that we asked them to do. She had high expectations for, for, um, Oprah to follow through. She trusted her.

She believed in her. And those were the emotions that sat with Oprah from the time she was in the third grade until now. She still recalls that, uh, moment very emotionally and very vividly. Uh, and it's one that I, um, certainly took to heart the moment that I heard ah, and so of course, um wove that into what I did as a principal in terms of giving children roles [00:07:00] and responsibilities so that every child, not just some children, every child is given the opportunity to taste what it feels like to be trusted, to be believed in um, and I get emotional honestly, just thinking about the power of those small gestures. 

Olivia: It's so interesting too that, um I think as teachers, we've hopefully had a student reach back out to us, like Oprah, to let us know of something that we did when they were in that space that impacted them. And it's fascinating, the children, um, I began teaching in the nineties and the children that reach out to me are now, um, in beyond college and probably in their mid-thirties, I'd say, but they, um. They reach out and they're often the quieter children in my class [00:08:00] that, um, they'll say, you did this or you did this. And it, it's just so interesting to me that how critical, how important it is - you just mentioned that everyone has a taste of what it feels like to be entrusted with responsibility. Muriel, then how does the idea of entrusting children with responsibility play into equity because you just alluded to that?

Muriel: It wasn't until we put a system in place that we were astounded by the fact that there were some children that got multiple opportunities over and over and over embarrassingly, um, looking and seeing, oh my gosh, we left this child out, we left this child out, we left this child out. So in terms of equity, when you collect the data and you create the system to ensure that it is all children, and I mean all, [00:09:00] and you're gonna see changes in your school culture, changes in academics. I mean, it's, it's astounding to me that something so simple can be so impactful. 

Olivia: What did you witness in particular as an instructional leader at A.B. Combs when it comes to entrusting kids with responsibility and how it benefits the whole community, not just the individual child.

Muriel: It's our responsibility as educators to recognize the individual unique gifts that, that someone brings to a community, for example, to a classroom, um, if you will, because we all have our own unique gifts and contributions. With that being said, I do think we have a responsibility to recognize individual, [00:10:00] um, gifts and help to nurture those for the betterment of the good as a whole, and I am with you 100% about the power of community. Because you see, all we know is all we know unless someone opens a door wider for us, and I feel that global education is critical. It's an imperative that we help our children understand that our world is much smaller than it seams, and that we need to care just as much for the children that live in India, Guatemala, that the list goes on and on as we care about our own and providing children with opportunities to practice that to get to know one another, and that is the beauty of The Leader in Me. We do have a system in place for our leader in these [00:11:00] schools to make these global connections with schools all around the world. And the results have been tremendous because it helps students all over the world understand we all beat with the same heart. We all have unique needs related to our communities. But some of those needs are very similar to the needs that we have in our own community. 

Olivia: We're going to wrap part one with a lightning round, and I have a couple of questions for you just to give your gut responses. Um, let's start with a question right out of the gate. What do you think the most dangerous thing a teacher or parent can do when it comes to responsibility and entrusting our children with it?

Muriel: Low expectations. I think when teachers and parents, um, I think that's a problem. [00:12:00] Not having high enough expectations. I think there's a level of entitlement, I'll be honest, um, that we need to really dispel quickly. Um that children are entitled to certain things and, um, I think we have to teach children, we work hard, we need to work hard. Um, and that things should not come easy. Um, and we should not enable one another. We should, um, and trust one another um and see someone's greatness and push them to that if they need to be gently not pushed in that direction. 

Olivia: I like it gently pushed. Um, what is one task and role that sounds like it is meaningful, but it isn't.

Muriel: I think we have to be very specific in the roles and tasks we give our students if they're going to be meaningful. So I think [00:13:00] taking a look at what we ask children to do, um, and the roles in which they play in the classroom and ask ourselves the question, um is this worthy of their time? Is this gonna make a difference?

Is this going to have impact? So I think we have to look out for, are we wasting children's time? 

Olivia: What do you say to caregivers or teachers that say, oh, my kids, they're just not ready for responsibility yet they, they're just not ready. 

Muriel: Well, I have had that say, said to me, um, as a principal many times, and my response is always just try. Children can do far more than any of us can expect them to do, and you put children in situations to give them opportunities to practice what it's that you're expecting of them. [00:14:00] And I think probably you and I both grew up in environments where the expectations were high for us, but they also gave us the safety net. Children want to be challenged. We all do. We want to be able to do that. But we might need to have our hand held a little bit. But not for long. 

Olivia: Part two, we're going to talk a lot about the word empowering, but empowering children to own their own learning journey. And um, I'm excited to revisit chapter six for that conversation. Thank you so much, Muriel. 

Muriel: Thank you. 

Olivia: That is a wrap on part one of my conversation with Muriel, and here are three of my key takeaways. There is a meaningful difference between handing a child a task and genuinely entrusting them with responsibility. One feels more transactional and the other is transformational, and kids can feel the difference. A second takeaway is that equity in the [00:15:00] classroom means creating systems that ensure every child, not just the confident or compliant children, get to taste what it feels like to be trusted and believed in. A third, low expectations are the most dangerous thing a teacher or caregiver can bring into a room. Children will almost always rise higher than we anticipate, but only if we give them the chance to try. 

Between now and Friday, here is my call to action for you. Think about one child in your life, in your classroom, in your home, who hasn't been handed a real responsibility lately. Not a task, a responsibility. This week, find one moment to hand them something meaningful and let them carry it. Then notice what happens. Share this conversation with another educator or caregiver who needs to hear it, and please come back for part two on Friday. Muriel and I talk about what it means to really empower children [00:16:00] to own their learning. We also talk about why discomfort is actually the whole point and what Muriel has witnessed in classrooms across the globe that can make us genuinely hopeful about the next generation. See you on FridayI.