Reasoning Through the Bible
Taking a cue from Paul, Reasoning Through the Bible is an expository style walk through the Scriptures that tells you what the Bible says. Reviewing both Old and New Testament books, as well as topical subjects, we methodically teach verse by verse, even phrase by phrase.
We have completed many books of the Bible and offer free lesson plans for teachers. If you want to browse our entire library by book or topic, see our website www.ReasoningThroughTheBible.com.
We primarily do expository teaching but also include a good bit of theology and apologetics. Just like Paul on Mars Hill, Christianity must address both the ancient truths and the questions of the people today. Join Glenn and Steve every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday as they reason with you through the Bible.
Reasoning Through the Bible
S33 || Part 2: Understanding God's Original Design for Marriage || Mark 10:1-12 || Session 33 || Verse by Verse Bible Study
Marriage reflects salvation itself—God's faithfulness despite our unfaithfulness. This profound reality explains why Jesus sets such a remarkably high standard for marriage in Mark 10, declaring "what God has joined together, let no one separate" and that remarriage after divorce constitutes adultery.
Yet beneath these severe-sounding statements lies a more complex and compassionate truth. The Pharisees tested Jesus with their question about divorce permissions, hoping to trap him in legalistic contradictions. Instead, Jesus cut through their self-serving interpretations by pointing back to creation's design while simultaneously revealing God's heart for protecting the vulnerable.
The cultural context proves essential for understanding what Jesus condemns. In patriarchal first-century society, men could discard wives for trivial reasons—even burning dinner—leaving women economically devastated and socially marginalized. Jesus specifically addresses this injustice, saying a man who divorces and remarries "commits adultery against her." His concern centers on protecting vulnerable women from exploitation, not forcing victims to remain in dangerous marriages.
Physical and emotional abuse represent profound violations of the marriage covenant. When one spouse systematically harms another, they have already fractured what God designed to be unbreakable. While God hates divorce because it breaks His ideal design, He also hates abuse and the exploitation of the vulnerable. Moses permitted divorce "because of the hardness of your hearts"—a recognition that in a fallen world, marriages can become destructive rather than life-giving.
For troubled marriages where abuse isn't present, hope remains through mutual commitment to growth. The triangular model provides profound insight: with husband and wife at the bottom corners and Christ at the top, as both partners move closer to Christ, they naturally grow closer to each other. This spiritual dynamic offers healing for relationships where both parties seek Christ-likeness together.
Whether you're contemplating marriage or navigating its challenges, embrace both God's perfect standard and His grace for our imperfection. Want to engage further? Email us at info@reasoningthroughthebible.com.
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May God Bless you!! - Glenn and Steve
Today we will have part two of a session that we started last time on divorce and remarriage in Mark, chapter 10. And if you were with us last time, then Jesus was answering a question that was posed to him by the religious leaders, which was is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife? Lawful for a man to divorce his wife? Jesus appeals to way back before the law in creation and he bases his answer on how God made the world in the first place. Male and female, the two shall become one flesh. He said some very difficult things. What God has put together, which God put together, the marriage, let no one separate. So with that he took away the right of any human being to have any divorce.
Speaker 1:That was quite a severe statement. So the disciples pull him aside and say Lord, help us out with this. And that's kind of where we left everyone hanging last time. So today we're going to pick up where we left off. Steve, there's parts of this that are going to get even more severe, but then I think, if we take a holistic look at this, there's also some very tender and loving things here that make some allowances. I guess is a lack of a better word that, I think, is going to not satisfy everybody, but nevertheless, this is what the Bible teaches.
Speaker 2:As we noted in last session, some might look at this and say, oh, this is about divorce and remarriage. I'm not even married, so I can skip over this part. No, this is really for people who aren't married at all, because we're really discussing how God thinks about marriage and it's the perfect time to understand how he thinks about it before you get into a serious relationship with someone else and get married to them.
Speaker 1:Jesus gives this teaching. And then, in Mark, chapter 10, verse 10, in the house, the disciples began questioning him about this again. Well, why were they questioning about it again? Is because they have a hard time accepting it, like all of us do, so they were hoping, possibly, for a different answer. They didn't understand a lot of what he thinks, a lot of what he taught, but nevertheless they're just like we are today. A lot of what he taught, but nevertheless they're just like we are today asking again, looking for a way to actually live life and still follow God's commands, because they knew they had to live in a real world, and a real world is full of fallible people. So hang in there with us. I think by the end of this we're going to see a very loving God dealing with normal human situations. Let's go ahead and read the last couple of verses from Steve. Can you read verses 11 and 12?
Speaker 2:And he said to them whoever divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her, and if she herself divorces her husband and marries another man, she is committing adultery.
Speaker 1:This is arguably even more severe than what he said before. Let no man separate. Now he's putting a moral baggage onto the idea of divorce and remarriage. We touched on this last time, steve, but let's again here because I think it's important. Why would Jesus make such difficult and severe claim about marriage? Didn't Jesus know about the pain that's in some marriage? And I think I mentioned last time I taught a class that had a large group of divorced people in it and there were physical abuse People whose lives were in danger physically because of the abuse of their spouse, and there were people that had such severe emotional abuse that it would affect their physical health just from the emotional abuse. And then you've got children involved and children living in situations like this. There's every type of abuse under the sun. Didn't Jesus know about marriages that are like this? There's every type of abuse under the sun. Didn't Jesus know about marriages that are like this?
Speaker 2:He does know that. He realizes that, obviously, but once again he's given a description of what the ideal situation is. As you noted at the very first part of our last session is when these Pharisees came up. They weren't asking him what the ideal situation was for marriage. They were asking him what was lawful. That had to do with the Mosaic law. God permitted Moses to make this allowance for divorce to happen because of the hardness of their heart. Jesus said that Moses permitted it because of the hardness of their heart. Jesus said that Moses permitted it because of the hardness of your heart, because of your stubbornness, meaning that they were going to do it anyway. There were going to be situations that come up that the divorces were going to happen. But, yes, jesus knows all of these situations and knows the heartache and everything that goes in with it, but he's still going to give us the ideal situation and the ideal directive of God the Father wants for marriages.
Speaker 1:One of the reasons why I think it's the main reason why Jesus puts such a high value on marriage is because the marriage relationship is a picture, a type of salvation. John 3.29,. Christ is the bridegroom. Ephesians 5,. The church is the bride.
Speaker 1:Salvation in Jesus Christ no less than our salvation in Jesus Christ is given as a picture of a wedding, a picture of a marriage. Because God is faithful and we are unfaithful. He stays with us even when we are adulterous and go after other idols and other gods. He stays with us. Even when we are very unlovable, he keeps the relationship. Even when we are very unlovable, he keeps the relationship. That's the picture is that we fall away in sin, but he still keeps his promise of a salvation. If he were to get mad and get frustrated and deal with all the abuse that we've given him with our sin, then it would destroy the salvation relationship. Now it's a salvation based on my ability to act right. Salvation is built on God's promise and his faithfulness and not mine. That's the picture. With this. We have this picture of salvation. That's why he's given it so important. We're the ones unfaithful to God, yet he still stays with us.
Speaker 1:Marriage is also the family, and just from a practical standpoint, in all societies, the family is what holds society together. The family is the unit that holds and I mean that seriously the unit that holds all societies together, seriously, the unit that holds all societies together. When the family breaks up, then the country breaks up, the society breaks up and you have mass chaos and a lot of abuse of people. This is why God says I hate divorce. So he has a very strict here in this passage let no man separate. And then in verses 11, 12 that we just read if you get divorced and marry another, you commit adultery. This is a high standard that our ear doesn't want to hear. The one possible exception is over in Matthew 5, 32, where Jesus gives an exception of unfaithfulness.
Speaker 1:Unfaithfulness, of course, has destroyed the marriage to start with. Again, we said at the beginning Steve, we are Bible teachers and as Bible teachers, what we have to do is teach what it says, and I think we've done that, but I think we haven't done all of that. It would be easy at this point to stop the lesson and pretend that there's people not out there really, really, really struggling with this. So the good news is that it's still in this passage. There's some love and some tenderness and even some allowances. I think it would be good to go through that, wouldn't?
Speaker 2:you, steve. Yes, and as we transition into this next section, glenn, over in Matthew 5, verses 27 and 28, say this this is Jesus teaching the people on what's referred to as the Sermon on the Mount. He says you have heard it was said, you shall not commit adultery, but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart. Now that goes both ways. That's both for the man and the woman.
Speaker 2:So guess what, before we even start talking about this other section and we've gone into it with some of the other part of it all of us most likely are already adulterers and have committed adultery in another fashion. So I want to put that out there. That, as we noted before, is that some pastors and teachers take this as just a clear black and white teaching, without putting some of the things into context. And if you haven't listened to part one, go back and listen to it, because we do give some context to this. But we are all adulterers, probably in most cases before we even ever get married, and I just want to put that out there as we get into this next section of this.
Speaker 1:Right, because I can say from what you said there in the Sermon on the Mount in Matthew, I'm guilty as anybody. I certainly have no moral grounds, matthew, I'm guilty as anybody. I certainly have no moral grounds for pointing at other people being immoral simply because I've committed so many sins myself. So we have here a situation where it's really easy for people that have good marriages to point fingers at people that don't have good marriages and say you should have been and you ought to have and look down on them. Please don't think I'm doing that. I was blessed with a very good marriage. I was blessed with my wife and I had very good personalities and we've gotten along very well over the years. Again, I can't put myself in the shoes of someone else that had a lot of abuse and pain and suffering and condemn that. I just can't. All I can do as a Bible teacher is tell you what the text says. I think too many times these legalistic pastors that possibly have very good marriages themselves look down on everybody and condemn them and they forget those passages, like you just said, steve, that none of us have any moral high ground. All of us have committed sins. That passage there in the Sermon on the Mount in Matthew 5, 6, and 7 concludes with be perfect, as your Father in heaven is perfect. Well, good luck, because none of us can do that, so none of us have any grounds to condemn anyone else. Next, look at Mark 10, 11. Yes, he says something very severe Whoever divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery, but don't stop there Commits adultery against her. Jesus is concerned about here the man abusing the woman and him sinning against her. What was the question that the Pharisees asked? Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife? And, of course, this patriarchal society, the men were in control of a lot of things. Jesus flips it around and says the protection is against the woman, the vulnerable one. He said of the man committing adultery against the wife that he put out, the wife that he divorced. The context of this type of divorce was the divorce that we mentioned in part one last time, which was she burns the chicken. Then we can divorce her, or we just get tired of her and divorce her. Jesus is saying that type of divorce is committing adultery against her. That's the context. We need to keep it in that context, which is the original one, and not pull this out into ours and say, oh, you know, we've got. I mean, people literally end up in the hospital because of physical abuse or having severe psychological issues because of emotional abuse. The context is not that. That's not what he's saying he's talking about again. One of these factions that Steve mentioned in part one was that divorce her for any reason. He's saying, no, you can't do that because you're committing adultery, you're just putting her out because you're tired of her. So that's really the first one.
Speaker 1:Secondly, notice here that in verses 11 and 12, the adultery is in the remarriage, not in the divorce. It's divorces and marries another. So the remarriage is the part where we need to stop and question. That's the one where we really need to have some questions. I mean, there was movie stars that have been married seven times and eventually you have to kind of say time out. There's something going on here that's not just a loving relationship. That's really kind of the context here. Secondly, and I think more importantly, steve, the original question here that Jesus asked back to the Pharisees was what? What did Moses allow? What did Moses say in that law?
Speaker 2:He permitted them to give a certificate of divorce, and it was for the man to divorce the woman. There wasn't any reciprocation of the woman being able to divorce the man. And I do just want to point out there in verse 12, that Jesus does extend this and says if she herself divorces her husband, Jesus acknowledges that the woman may do this as well, but there's still concerns about it in general as to what the ideal marriage is In.
Speaker 1:Mark, chapter 10, that we've spent last time and this time going over. The question was what was lawful? The law, as we just read back in Deuteronomy, chapter 24, was a protection of the weak. It was a protection of the most vulnerable to prevent abuse. So that was the context.
Speaker 1:Jesus answers the question by appealing way back before that, all the way back to the Garden of Eden in creation, and saying he based his answer on creation. Because of that, he says that's why it's male and female, that's why we shouldn't have divorce or else the remarriage is going to cause adultery. But get the picture God knew all that from the Garden of Eden. God knew all of that. God had the same value on divorce and remarriage all the way back to the Garden of Eden that he had in Mark, chapter 10. Jesus isn't introducing anything new. He told them that in this passage. They ask him well, why did Moses allow it? He said it was because of your sin. All the way back to the Garden of Eden, god still hated divorce. He had the same values around it. Yet he intentionally allowed divorce in the Mosaic Law. Why? Because of human sin. He knew we would be imperfect. He knew people would get into marriages where the other person is a sinner and they would be abusing people. So he allowed for divorce because he knew people would be in these situations and the human situations. God's not forcing people to stay in an abusive relationship. What he's saying in Mark 10, verses 11 and 12, is that these men that were in power passing these women around just because they're tired of them, that's adultery. Passing these women around just because they're tired of them, that's adultery. He said the same God said in the Mosaic law that, okay, I'm going to allow divorce, but I'm going to allow divorce in a way that prevents abuse of the weak people and prevents abuse of the system here. Abuse of the system here.
Speaker 1:God at the same time lays out a perfect standard. Just like you read quotes from Matthew chapter 5, if you look at a woman, you're guilty of adultery. You call somebody a fool, you're a murderer. That same level of moral standard is right here in Mark, chapter 11. But God still forgives, even in Matthew chapter 5, and he still forgives back in Deuteronomy 24, and he still forgives in Mark chapter 10. We teach this passage the way God said it.
Speaker 1:Yes, divorce and remarriage is adultery. So is looking at a woman with lust in your heart. So is murder being calling somebody a fool. We don't go around being legalistic about calling people a fool. I've heard some of these same pastors that were so legalistic and so judgmental about people getting divorced. They're calling people name and violating those same rules out of Matthew 5, and they're insensitive about it. So I submit that, yes, it's very clear right here in red and white in Mark 10, let no man separate, and if you divorce and remarriage, it's adultery. But that's half the picture. And remarriage it's adultery, but that's half the picture. The other half of the picture is that we have a God that's loving and he realizes the human condition and he realizes that not all marriages are perfect and he's not going to require abusive marriages to stay in that relationship because he cares about the most vulnerable in our society and gives them a way out, which is called divorce.
Speaker 2:And that's taken out of context many times for people to keep people in relationships that they shouldn't be in. I'm going to say right up front I think there are situations where divorces need to happen and I think it's from a case-by-case basis. That quote from Malachi, chapter 2, in Malachi God is posing rhetorical questions that the people are throwing up to him, and in that particular one the people are saying you're not honoring our sacrifices that we're making to you anymore, god. Why is that? In his response to them, he says you are not honoring the commitment that you've made to your wives of your youth. You're dishonoring the covenant that you've made with them. You're abusing the relationship from a standpoint that you're not taking it seriously.
Speaker 2:Then he comes with the quote that says God hates divorce. So it's not just a simple God hates divorce and that's it. No, there's a context in Malachi that he uses that they're not taking their vows seriously. They're not taking this. Man and wife leave their parents and they become one flesh. That's the whole background of that particular sentence. We're teaching the whole counsel of the Word of God related to it, and part of what we're doing is because we have seen people that have, out of guilt kept some people in marriages that they shouldn't be kept in. Now, the opposite of that is true, from the standpoint to tell people that God doesn't like divorce. If you're wanting to get a divorce from your spouse because you just don't love them anymore and there really isn't any other reason because of it, or that you want to go off and go with somebody else, and that's the only reason, you need to understand that, yeah, god has a divorce and you need to rethink it.
Speaker 1:On a serious matter, Exactly and I would agree with 100% of what you said. Just to be really clear with my opinion as a Bible teacher, I taught this as strictly as I could, but at the same time, to be a balanced Bible teacher, we have to recognize that the Word of God says that if you're in some type of abusive relationship, you don't have to stay there. That's what Deuteronomy 24 was about. God gave that, knowing that there'd be situations where that would happen Again. What did we bring up in part one? The woman caught in adultery.
Speaker 1:In the very act, jesus said where's your accusers? And if they're not here, neither do I condemn you. So that's in the Bible too. There's the woman at the well that had been married five times and was living with a guy. He's cordial to her. We have a God that is both loving and righteous at the same time, and he understands human condition. I don't think, as a Bible teacher, he would sit here and say, oh, you have to stay in that, no matter how painful and abusive it is. But as we said earlier, steve, I mean there's movie stars get married six, seven times and they're not really holding marriage to be a true thing, like God wants it to be.
Speaker 2:Along that vein. The opposite is is that most people, I would say, need to work on their marriage. They chose that spouse for a reason in their youth and they need to work on the marriage. They need to take their wedding vows seriously. If the reason that you want to get out of a marriage is really just a silly reason like I mentioned before, I don't love them anymore for some other type of reason that might be there, that's not outside of the abusive one that we've talked about then you need to work on your marriage and that's for both spouses to do that. You committed to each other and it needs to be worked on. So, like I said, it's a case-by-case basis. God wants marriage to be taken seriously and the point that you need to take marriage seriously is before you get married, and that's why we have encouraged people that aren't married that these two sessions really are for you to understand what you're getting into in the eyes of God.
Speaker 1:In our country, physical abuse of a spouse is a crime and I don't know all the laws in every country but if you're in a country where physically abusing and usually it's the women that get abused, but if you're in a country where physical abuse of a woman is not illegal, then it ought to be that's a crime, ladies.
Speaker 1:If you're in a situation where you're being physically abused, that's a crime. Do not stay there. Your life and your children's life is too important to God and to your future. That's a case for the authorities. It's a case for people that are better counselors than I to come in and deal with situations like that. Emotional abuse can be also just as detrimental. I've seen it, I've heard it and I would just simply say again yes, god says all these very strict things on divorce and remarriage, but at the same time, he also has compassion on people and does not expect people to stay in situations where they could be physically killed or put in the hospital or situations like that or emotionally scarred to where now the health of the children is at stake. God knew all of that in advance, which is why he allowed for divorce in the Mosaic Law.
Speaker 2:Now to end on a little bit more of an uplifting note, that to work on your marriage, I would suggest, if you feel that you need to go to counseling, go to a Christian counselor. Go to that. The first thing that you should also do is that if you're not a Christian, become a Christian. If you're not a believer in Jesus Christ, get serious about that. Acknowledge that you're in need of a Savior and change your mind about Jesus Christ. Believe on Him that's for both spouses and get serious about your life.
Speaker 2:Your life will be changed by becoming a believer. If you'll get a picture in your head of a triangle and you have the husband on the one bottom corner of the triangle, you have the woman on the other corner of the triangle and Jesus at the top. As both of you become more Christ-like, you find yourself becoming more and more closer together. That's the key way to work on your marriage. Get Jesus Christ involved in your life and in your marriage so that it can be restored if it's in a situation where you're not a believer, and even if you are a believer, go back to the love that you once had before of Jesus Christ. Both of you and your marriage will become better as you both become more Christlike.
Speaker 1:We'd love to hear from you because we are genuinely interested in your thoughts and feelings on how we teach. So you can leave a comment for us or reach out to us at our email, which is info I-N-F-O at reasoningthroughthebiblecom, and meanwhile, tune back in with us next time, as we will continue to reason through the gospel of.
Speaker 2:Mark, thank you so much for watching and listening. May God bless you.
