#186 After 2 Beers: Loyalty Test - When Your Relationship Needs Verification

Trust issues reach new heights as we explore the controversial business of relationship loyalty testing, where one woman charges $5,000 to digitally flirt with your partner and report back the results. Would you ever consider such a test, or does the very thought of needing one signal deeper relationship problems?

We dive into a heart-stopping courtroom moment when a judge mistakenly pronounced a man "guilty" of murder charges before realizing his error 20 agonizing seconds later. The casual "Did I not say 'not'?" correction that followed raises serious questions about our justice system and the psychological impact of such a profound mistake.

The scorned lover revenge story from Kentucky will leave you speechless – one woman's post-breakup rampage caused over $12,000 in damage to her ex's car. From glitter in the vents to salt in the engine, she proudly owned her destruction, later claiming pregnancy stress as the trigger. This leads us to reflect on those relationships we've escaped that could have ended similarly catastrophically.

Perhaps the most audacious crime story we've ever covered involves two teenagers who stole an actual train after learning to operate it on YouTube. Their joyride ended predictably badly when they couldn't figure out how to stop the locomotive – a perfect metaphor for many of life's impulsive decisions.

Between laughs and incredulous reactions, we're reminded that sometimes the strangest stories help us cope with life's challenges. As we always say at the end of our shows – life is hard enough, so we're just here to lighten the mood and remind you that we're all in this together. When you see someone struggling, sometimes all it takes is inviting them for a sandwich to make a difference.

Transcript

Show Introduction & Tonight's Topics

Speaker 1 0:02

Welcome to the After 2 Beers podcast. I'm Dutch Dalton, joined as always by Kimberly Ross. That's me, michael Summers. What's going on? And in the studio, mr Jeremy Screddy what? It be like and the producer himself, Mr Kevin Shook.

Speaker 3 0:17

Hi, we got a lot of people.

Speaker 4 0:19

We got a lot of people.

Speaker 3 0:20

Yeah.

Speaker 1 0:21

This is Look at that. Yeah look, it's starting to look fancy.

Speaker 4 0:24

We know what we're doing.

Speaker 1 0:26

Yeah, we appreciate you tuning into the after two beers podcast. We've been at this now a little over eight years and, uh, if by some chance this is your first time listening to the show, basically what we do, we consume a couple of drinks, the idea being that, uh, it kind of opens up the honesty tree. I actually just read today where 54% of Americans say they don't drink anymore.

Speaker 5 0:52

Really yeah, they just do the other stuff.

Speaker 1 0:55

Oh or nothing at all. Yeah, they're switched up Quitters.

Speaker 5 1:01

No, I'm thinking, you know a lot of the states have gone, you know to where it's legal to do the marriage whanny?

Speaker 1 1:08

That's probably why bars are still so popular in Richmond.

Speaker 2 1:12

I still have my vice.

Speaker 4 1:14

Everybody has their vice.

Speaker 1 1:16

So, basically, we chat about things that are going on throughout the world, A couple stories that you may not hear anywhere else. A couple stories that you may not hear anywhere else. For instance, tonight we're going to talk about how much do you trust the person you are with in a relationship?

Speaker 2 1:32

Oh my, this is a deep one, bro.

Speaker 1 1:36

I'm like, are you guys?

Speaker 2 1:37

going to like am I being punked? I'm out.

Speaker 4 1:41

I'm going to set this one out, guys. Oh yeah, I love you.

Speaker 3 1:44

I love out. I'm going to set this one out, guys.

Speaker 2 1:46

Yeah, oh yeah, I love you, I love you.

Speaker 1 1:51

We're going to talk about an issue at court. That is the wildest thing I've ever seen in a courtroom. Oh, I can't wait. And some other stories there's probably one about Florida somewhere in here you know it. Before we get going, we want to make sure we thank our good buddy, kevin Shook here at E-Studio's Global Media Enterprises. Helps us put this together, basically produces the whole thing. So if you're looking at this, thinking, well, I can do better than these guys.

Speaker 5 2:17

Yeah, these guys are some hacks.

Speaker 1 2:19

That ain't that bad. These guys suck. I could do that. Well, you can't. All you got to do is reach out to Kevin, he'll help you out with it.

Speaker 5 2:25

It's not that hard. Come down now. You'll just look fancier sucking at us yeah.

Speaker 1 2:29

Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 4 2:30

If I can figure it out. Hey, and if you don't think we suck, give us a like. Yes.

Speaker 1 2:35

Share or, biggest thing, you can us a review please? Um, just uh, let us know what you think. If you like the show enough to think you know what, I'm gonna make sure these guys are financially stable enough to continue this amazing broadcasting. You can do that. What you gotta do go to patreoncom backslash after two beers for as little as three dollars a month.

Speaker 4 2:57

We didn't raise our prices with tariffs no we held strong and I and I hope you know all that money goes towards alcohol.

Speaker 1 3:06

That's right, we're keeping Anheuser-Busch.

Speaker 5 3:09

Improving the podcast.

Speaker 1 3:12

We also want to make sure we thank all of the individuals and all the great organizations here in the community that helped make this possible. We do a lot of trivia here locally.

Speaker 4 3:20

Oh yeah.

Speaker 1 3:21

The VFW, the Mooseose, uh elks, all those places plus. Uh, we have a great partner in uh, down the street brings us this amazing liquor every week, the bottle shop, and uh, well, can't all be grammy winners can't be grammy winners tonight they brought us wine drinkers, but yeah well.

Speaker 1 3:44

They brought us minks which, as it was first described to me, is a 16% alcohol. Now you know you're dealing with a high-caliber wine when they have to bring up how much alcohol's in it. Very largely Right. It has nothing to do with flavor. Is this a fancy Mad Dog? This is. It's like this generation's Boone's Farm. Terry make this. Terry makes that. This is a 16% alcohol. Peach mango and, what's probably more important for most people, jeremy, what's the out-the-door price on this thing? $11.51. Oh you know, oh yeah.

Speaker 2 4:23

Yeah, daddy.

Speaker 5 4:24

For some 16 percenter.

Speaker 1 4:26

Yeah, and you got some DIY wine bottles. When it's all said and done, yeah there you go.

Speaker 4 4:31

That's a better deal than the hand sanitizer.

Speaker 1 4:33

Yeah right, Cheers the hand sanitizer tastes better, though. All right, here it goes.

Speaker 4 4:41

Oh, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 4:43

What is that? Peach mango.

Speaker 1 4:47

Well it is 32 proof.

Speaker 4 4:49

Tastes like pennies.

Speaker 5 4:52

It does not taste like pennies.

Speaker 2 4:54

Oh, wow, I'll tell you this.

Speaker 5 4:56

At first I thought you said panties and I was like, well, that's weird If it tastes like panties, everybody would be buying it.

Speaker 2 5:02

I think it says edible panty wine. Those things were pretty good really.

Speaker 5 5:03

It tastes like panties everybody would be buying it, buying it. Are these those edible panty wine, those?

Speaker 1 5:06

things were pretty good really. It tastes like Froot Loops yeah or Froot Roll-Ups.

Speaker 4 5:10

Did you ever have those? No, I never had one. I've had.

Speaker 2 5:13

Froot Roll-Up, and that's what it was we should do one for the show. Yeah, they stick to your teeth.

Speaker 4 5:19

Look at me, do I've ever had that? I'm too hot, melt on me and get all sticky. Oh sticky.

Speaker 1 5:25

I can't believe it. There you go, just out of my. This is why I don't tell my kids when I'm doing this show.

Speaker 3 5:29

Yeah right, all right, are we ready to jump into?

Speaker 1 5:31

our first subject for the evening.

Speaker 4 5:33

All right, what do we got tonight Dutch?

Speaker 1 5:35

Actually, before we get into it, this is and I just literally came up with this literally as Jeremy was talking. Actually it was Gibbler. Gibbler was talking about DraftKings Apparently they have some new swag out and she was very excited, which Jeremy said he's not allowed on that page anymore. And you know marital bliss and what have you probably.

Speaker 1 5:57

Regardless of that, it made me think about something one time as I'm watching television. You know, basically, basically, if you watch sports, now it's it's just oh, here's the DraftKings odds on this. It's all about gambling, and then they'll have an ad that comes up that says if you have a problem to give us a phone call, right right what's wild to me is the phone number. The phone number. Do you guys know this? No, it's 1-800 gambling.

Speaker 1 6:26

It's like the only thing that you would call that like you wouldn't say like man, I like little kids and it's like call 1-800 child molester, right you know what I mean. Like it's the one thing that you do bad and they put it in the title.

Speaker 5 6:41

Yeah, how many times you think that they have people call and be like, yeah, well, I just need to put $5 on the Spurs, yeah.

Speaker 1 6:48

You're supposed to be helping me out, right?

Speaker 5 6:50

What do you got on Sunday? Oh, I'm sorry.

Speaker 4 6:52

Wrong number.

Speaker 5 6:54

I thought you were going to help me out with my gambling. Well, it's like Vegas there, there's a thing like that.

Speaker 1 7:02

Yeah, the people that are good.

Speaker 4 7:05

No, if you have a problem, you can call the casino and tell them hey, put me on the list so. I cannot gamble there Really yeah.

Speaker 3 7:13

Well, that's good.

Speaker 2 7:13

You got that for strip clubs.

Speaker 3 7:17

Not that I found out, I mean so I've heard.

Speaker 1 7:23

Buddy Aaron Sitlow checking in. Hello Aaron, appreciate you All right, let's go ahead and jump into it. I just 1-800-GAMBLING. It's just. I don't know you could have came up with something better, like can't win, or you know, 1-800-loser. Right, something All right. Here's our first story no-transcript, and I'm sure Kevin can find some photos of Miss. Lana. Here's how it works For a fee of $5,000,. She uses only digital communication, such as social media or phone contact provided by the clients. So, for instance, if you, you and puddin were together, okay, you would hire lana I would hire her yes, pay five grand, holy

Speaker 1 8:33

cow to send messages to puddin to see if he'll respond, oh so, like a cheating trap.

Speaker 2 8:41

Yeah, yeah, it's kind of like entrapment it's like real life entrapment.

Speaker 1 8:45

That's bullshit. Well.

Speaker 5 8:46

I have friends that would probably do it for free.

Speaker 1 8:48

Now, this is what she looks like, right? Oh yeah, if.

Speaker 4 8:52

I got something from somebody like that, I'd be like, yeah, fuck off AI.

Speaker 2 8:55

This is catfishing. She's got a penis Get away from me China.

Speaker 4 9:00

You can't give me China.

Speaker 1 9:03

According to Madison, many men fold within hours, often responding to a single selfie or a flirty emoji, with some even trying to meet up the same night.

Speaker 4 9:15

No, that'd be a thing with me. I'd show her. I'd be like look at this fucking chick. You know, this is fake.

Speaker 2 9:20

Yeah, I mean that's fake news.

Loyalty Testing Services: $5,000 for Trust

Speaker 4 9:22

Even if she was real, she wouldn't like short fat guy's nickname Puddin' I guarantee that, oh my God, that's kind of funny.

Speaker 2 9:32

Only goth girls would get Puddin'.

Speaker 1 9:34

What's wild to me is here, local everywhere. I'm sure this happens all over the world. I'll get Facebook requests much like everybody does from a very attractive female who, literally, has just created her page. Yeah, this month, yes, and not a lot going on on the page, no, but you can Now. What's funny to me, though, is you can see your mutual friends All guys, yeah, and they're like the same 10, 12 dudes Every time. Every time, oh, this girl must want me.

Speaker 4 10:05

That's why I'm gonna accept this, yeah, yeah you're being, uh, you're being hacked there, buddy just like candy hip hugger love to me for three songs.

Speaker 1 10:15

Yeah, right as soon as I ran out of money. Apparently I wasn't pretty anymore. Uh, some clients break down emotionally after seeing the screenshots or receipts of their boyfriend's behavior. Madison views her role as often offering clarity not destroying what the hell Not destroying?

Speaker 5 10:34

What do you mean not destroying? Is it hot in?

Speaker 1 10:36

here or is it just me.

Speaker 2 10:38

Is it just the minks? It's the 16. Yeah, the minks is growing on you, baby.

Speaker 5 10:43

Sweating like a horned church over here. You do have long sleeves on. If you want to get warm, get some minks.

Speaker 2 10:49

Could be the shots plus the minks.

Speaker 1 10:51

Oh, that's true, we did have shots.

Speaker 4 10:55

I took my shower not too long ago.

Speaker 2 10:56

You ever feel like it didn't take. And we're not skinny, no, no.

Speaker 1 11:00

A lot going on there.

Speaker 4 11:00

Speak for yourself. I identify as two.

Speaker 1 11:03

Now Madison has 76,000 followers. I bet she does. After this show she'll probably have at least two more, and she had about 100.

Speaker 3 11:15

Three, what was?

Speaker 2 11:16

that name. Obviously, jeremy. One, two, three, well four. She's going to have four.

Speaker 1 11:22

Yeah, Jeremy and Aaron Sitlow those are the guys Got them $150,000 earned.

Speaker 5 11:30

What kind of time frame?

Speaker 1 11:31

A month Probably a month.

Speaker 5 11:33

I guarantee it.

Speaker 1 11:33

A day. I'm going to guess total. Okay 76,000 followers, isn't that? Before we got shut down by Zuckerberg. We were over 100,000. Yeah, but no, regardless. This is a real service. Now here's where the questions come. I'm curious Would you ever imagine yourself being in a relationship where you would try something like this?

Speaker 2 12:00

No.

Speaker 1 12:02

I can't imagine it either.

Speaker 4 12:03

Because as soon as it popped up I would show her. I'd be like look at this shit. You know that's fake, you know that's fake.

Speaker 1 12:12

I would imagine it would be just as easy to do it yourself. All you've got to do is go out and create a fake profile yeah, yeah, yeah, fake profile, and just tap here somewhere.

Speaker 2 12:22

Yeah, if you have to do that though.

Speaker 5 12:25

I mean, come on, that's what, it's already trouble.

Speaker 2 12:27

It's yeah, I mean, you should just be done.

Speaker 1 12:34

If you're, if you're trying to figure that out, that's just too much. Well, you know it's funny you bring that up because I was actually researching this about. Why do some people need reassurance in relationships? Right, and some were people that are dealing with insecurities amongst themselves. A lot of it's only it's self-staff, right Low self-esteem. Another one was unresolved issues from past trauma, but maybe deep down the relationship just sucks. I mean that happens.

Speaker 4 13:00

And you're looking for a way out Right. With the prophet, with somebody that's nobody.

Speaker 5 13:07

Now I thought of an A to B version of this whole situation right when he's trying to get out, so he goes ahead and pays for it. No, no, no.

Speaker 1 13:16

I'm trying to take this. Wouldn't it be awesome if you knew what was going on and you played along with it? Oh well, Some people do that. No, no, no, no, Hear me out Like you're just going to say how do you prove that you were new the whole time? Because you start saying the most weird shit.

Speaker 4 13:36

Oh, just bringing up weird shit.

Speaker 1 13:38

Like hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, I appreciate you reaching out. I've been looking to explore some shit. I'm not real cool doing it with my wife. I got this weird disney porn fetish, but here I want a big man off my ass. Like you know, snow white and seven dwarfs. I want one of the dwarfs to be regular size and there to be seven little snow whites and like just keep playing with it and like just keep playing with it.

Speaker 5 14:07

I want you to step on my pews right, just the weirdest shit.

Speaker 1 14:11

Or just like are you into old people porn too? But I want like the guy dresses the woman and the woman dresses the guy.

Speaker 5 14:19

I'm talking 80s can you smack my ass with your cane?

Speaker 3 14:22

whoa step on my pews beat me with the apple right. Can you smack my ass with your cane? Whoa Beat me with an apple.

Speaker 1 14:28

Beat me with the apple Right.

Speaker 5 14:31

That's what I'm thinking. I'm just going to lay here and act like I'm asleep, like sleep and beauty. You know what?

Speaker 2 14:34

would be funny Is if Kevin shook. We did this live podcast and we found an actual cheaters, like the show cheaters and we follow them in the bar.

Speaker 1 14:47

That would be funny. Aaron said that's a thought. I am not gonna lie. I was driving today. I wrote that on the way in.

Speaker 4 14:55

I was trying to think of weird Disney porn and I'm like some people, like dwarfs or little people right, but it wasn't the hair on her head.

Speaker 3 15:06

This is going to get really weird. Little people.

Speaker 4 15:08

I'm going to make this weird tonight Midget and the one-armed bandit.

Speaker 1 15:15

I mean, this is a TV episode waiting to happen.

Speaker 4 15:17

Only they wouldn't go as far as I just did right Step on my pubes, but the idea is like just go through.

Speaker 2 15:23

With the donkey, with Shrek.

Speaker 4 15:25

Why don't you shave my pubes, kick me in the balls, you know? Tell me I'm a good boy.

Speaker 1 15:29

I'm actually attracted to someone in my wife's family Her father.

Speaker 4 15:33

Her father Just see where it goes. As long as you pretend to be her mother.

Speaker 1 15:42

Tell me how shitty your son-in-law is. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 4 15:46

Okay, where are we going with this? I have no idea. No, no, my whole thing was.

Speaker 1 15:49

Can we keep going?

Speaker 2 15:50

I want to go on a Disney cruise now, oh boy.

Speaker 1 15:56

All right no, where I was going with it is that this is an actual service to basically set up someone to see if they're really fully invested in your situation.

Speaker 1 16:08

It's like there's a joke right where a guy is getting married into the family and he goes to the future in-law's home and his future sister-in-law is very attractive, right, yep, and she's like I know I shouldn't do this. You guys aren't technically married yet. You're engaged, you're going to be married soon. I want to have sex with you. Oh right, the guy you've heard this, yeah, and he's like what she's like I want to have sex with you. So the guy leaves the room, walks, walks down the steps, walks right out into his car. As he's getting into his car, the family runs out and said oh, we're so thankful.

Speaker 3 16:52

We didn't do it.

Speaker 1 16:53

He's like yeah you're right. The moral of the story is going to get condoms.

Speaker 5 16:57

Yeah, the condoms in the box.

Speaker 1 17:01

He was going to go yeah, he was going to go get laid. Chris Rock says that a man is only as faithful as his options.

Speaker 4 17:14

Josh Hunter. I don't know, buddy, you know what A?

Speaker 1 17:18

whole lot of stuff I'm taking After Two Beers on a new ride baby. Oh man yeah bonfire discussions oh, they're the best. All right, now I'm going to ask my good buddy, kevin Shook, to find a video here for me. This is the weirdest thing. Oh no, this is out of the court. Okay.

Speaker 4 17:36

The court one.

Speaker 1 17:37

This happened five days ago in Georgia. What you'll want to do, kevin up alton a-l-t-o-n like alton brown, last name oliver and um. Look up when his um verdict was announced. You're gonna look for a quick video now let me give you some backstory on this. This is a weird deal and the reason I ask you about this is have you had a moment in your life recently where you've had or not recently, just in general, like where it was something really, really impactful in your life and in a good or a bad way, and it literally sends lightning bolts up and down your spine, like maybe it's a medical thing and you're worried all of a sudden that maybe you know what I mean yeah, or like you can feel the adrenaline rush yeah, it's bad, right, so this would have to be.

Speaker 4 18:23

Yeah, I got this message from this hot chick.

Speaker 1 18:27

Yeah, this ain't it, Kevin, Let me if you go to YouTube, I should have sent you the link. Now I feel like a Joe Rogan podcast.

Speaker 4 18:35

Hey, bring it up, Bring it up.

Speaker 2 18:38

Theo Vaughn would be worse.

Speaker 1 18:41

I don't even listen to that guy. I actually I've, I actually Dro Rogan. It's hit or miss man, it's the guest.

Speaker 2 18:48

Bring up the homosexual squirrels that like chicken noodles.

Speaker 1 18:55

So this guy is 26 year old, Named Alton Oliver. He was on trial In Georgia last week. He was facing murder Charges. He was accused Of killing an off dutyduty cop in 2022. They claimed it was in self-defense. Yeah, but there's one that actually reads it, because that's like a news story. We don't want the news story one. The trial lasted three days, wrapped up last Friday and the jury quickly came with a verdict. They handed it to the judge and everyone was on the edge of their seat, just like everyone listening to this podcast right now, I know they are Waiting for the response.

Speaker 4 19:36

Oh my God, I don't know, guilty.

Speaker 1 19:38

I'm going to have to look into the cockroach race. I was going to say do you want to? Just it's a short one, 36 cents Verdict reach no, that ain't it.

Speaker 5 19:54

I was going to say we can just forward it to him.

Speaker 1 19:56

Yeah, anyway.

Speaker 3 20:00

Drop it in a Facebook messenger.

Speaker 4 20:02

Yeah.

Speaker 1 20:02

Drop it like it's hot Drop it like it's hot.

Speaker 4 20:04

Drop it like it's hot.

Speaker 1 20:05

This is why we haven't made any money.

Speaker 4 20:09

Pause for the cause People love us.

Speaker 2 20:11

Damn it. Let's talk about somewhere Disney. There's a whole other story right there.

Speaker 4 20:15

Getting worked up back here.

Speaker 2 20:17

What's that? The cockroach race is in Rochdale, Indiana.

Speaker 4 20:20

Are you serious?

Speaker 2 20:21

Yeah, I don't know.

Speaker 1 20:28

That? Are you serious? Yeah, I don't know, that's awesome.

Speaker 2 20:30

All right, here it is. Look up verdict. Reach for Alton Oliver.

Speaker 1 20:33

You could probably have a cockroach reach here in town. All right, here it is. Judge reads verdict as guilty.

Speaker 4 20:39

I said it Guilty oh no.

Speaker 3 20:40

Yeah, so here's what happened.

Speaker 1 20:43

The gentleman, alton, is waiting to find out his fate. Yeah, and the judge reads it and he says he was charged on six counts of different, various crimes. And the judge said that, per the jury, he was guilty on all six counts. The problem was he read it wrong? Oh no, but he didn't realize it until someone in the jury caught it. So that guy right there this is live right here Alton is sitting there thinking he just got convicted of six counts of murder against a police office and the judge goes oh, did I not pronounce it correctly?

Speaker 2 21:29

I'm not guilty oh shit. Yes, I'd punch him in the throat.

Courtroom Error: From Guilty to Not Guilty

Speaker 1 21:34

And then he makes a joke about it, and that's the part I really wanted to get. Was he goes? Oh, I apologize for my mispronunciation Right. Was he goes? Oh, I apologize for my mispronunciation Right. So he told this guy originally that he was convicted for six charges, one being murder against an off-duty police officer, and for 20 seconds that guy sat there and thought he was done Like I'm dead.

Speaker 5 21:59

Forever, how old was this guy? He had his tie already waiting.

Speaker 1 22:02

There's the judge. The kid was 26. Oh yeah.

Speaker 4 22:05

He, you know, he sat in there thinking his life was over Like over.

Speaker 1 22:09

And so he reads it and, as you're seeing, it's just. I wish we could get the audio of his.

Speaker 4 22:14

He'd be like looking at your lawyer, like I thought we did good on this.

Speaker 1 22:19

Right that lawyer's like what did you just say, man, I'm better like soups. And right there he goes. Did I not say not? And then he laughs, he kind of makes a smirk about it.

Speaker 5 22:31

Wow, I, I, just I, I'm so you can tell, because that guy's like back there trying to calm somebody down.

Speaker 1 22:37

Well, yeah, that was when he changed it and said oh, they're not guilty did you not the?

Speaker 2 22:43

I mean since the judge, and we're seeing all this did you see the judge that passed away the Judge Scudero? Yeah, yeah, the guy that was really cool on the videos yeah, all the videos and stuff he passed away 88.

Speaker 1 22:54

Yeah, squirrel, sorry.

Speaker 2 22:57

I'm like I have no idea, Not as sad. I've watched a lot of his videos.

Speaker 1 23:00

He's a cool dude, I know I'm just giving you shit. Now I thought about this what if it was the reverse?

Speaker 4 23:08

Oh yeah, if you said not guilty, oh, wait a minute, no Right.

Speaker 1 23:11

So for 20 seconds. You think you're free.

Speaker 2 23:13

Mistrial and life is good and you're going home, wouldn't you say mistrial?

Speaker 1 23:17

Yeah, and then all of a sudden, oh my bad, I mean guilty.

Speaker 3 23:29

Did I not my bad, I mean guilty, did I?

Speaker 5 23:30

not say that right and then make a joke about that. Yeah, I'm sorry, you're guilty.

Speaker 1 23:32

I'm sorry, I know you look good in orange yeah, like where's judge, you've got to hear the audio this oh, did I mispronounce it? Oh, my god, oh.

Speaker 4 23:45

Oh silly me.

Speaker 1 23:45

And I thought they had to wear robes.

Speaker 4 23:47

I don't know Where's this at I don't know Georgia.

Speaker 5 23:50

I have never been in a courtroom at all. Ever, Not ever in my entire life. Oh, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 23:56

Time for Kimmy to get in trouble tonight.

Speaker 1 23:58

You shut your face.

Speaker 2 23:59

That means she's got a good lawyer. You, that means she's got a good lawyer. It's time for Kimmy to do something bad.

Speaker 4 24:05

I thought I had a good lawyer.

Speaker 5 24:06

I've only been in the he got busted.

Speaker 3 24:10

You can punch somebody at the.

Speaker 5 24:11

Coney tonight. Intake no, I've paid to get people out of jail, friends of mine, why?

Speaker 2 24:18

do you keep looking at me? I wasn't. You've taken me to the hospital.

Speaker 5 24:21

I've taken you to the hospital, but no, I've only been into where the police actually park over there to pay a speeding ticket. I had one speeding ticket in Richmond, but no, that's it.

Speaker 1 24:36

Yeah.

Speaker 5 24:36

Well, most people haven't.

Speaker 1 24:38

That's another Chris Strach joke. Yeah, you know, credit for something you're not supposed to do.

Speaker 3 24:44

Most people aren't supposed to go to court.

Speaker 4 24:48

Yeah, I was going into court. One time A friend was coming out with a client of his and he goes hey, everything all right. I was like what do you think Not? So much, Not so much buddy. I'm not here on a field trip. He's not looking around.

Speaker 2 25:04

I've been there multiple times, kimmy, I just wanted to check out our judicial system. X's.

Speaker 5 25:10

I never took it to court.

Speaker 1 25:11

Actually, I'm so glad you brought that up.

Speaker 2 25:16

I just said I went to court multiple times.

Speaker 1 25:18

You said X's. And that brings me into my next story. This one comes out of Lexington, kentucky. 31 year old woman is facing charges after she damaged that's the mixin' oh.

Speaker 2 25:33

I've seen this one. You saw this. I saw this. This is crazy.

Speaker 1 25:36

She damaged her ex-boyfriend's car so bad the car had to be totaled. Her name is Stephanie Karklis. She's Dirty Hot, is she good?

Speaker 2 25:46

Yeah, she's dirty hot.

Speaker 1 25:48

Yeah, well, she's from Kentucky.

Speaker 2 25:52

And she's smiling kind of in her mugshot.

Speaker 5 25:54

She had an extra tooth.

Speaker 1 25:55

Well, they got in some sort of fight earlier last month and she slashed one of his tires, yeah, but the real damage came later that month.

Speaker 5 26:03

She did it again. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 26:05

He did it again After a second fight on July 5th. Yeah, that's the woman's side of it, right? What did, he do wrong.

Speaker 5 26:11

What did he do again.

Speaker 4 26:12

He did it again.

Speaker 1 26:20

After a second fight on July 15th. He says she smashed his windshield, cracked his rearview mirror, destroyed his radio, filled his vents with glitter, poured salt in his engine.

Speaker 4 26:28

Oh, there she is. She's a look at those eyes.

Speaker 2 26:31

I could save her. I mean, how can I make you? She's a nice lady, she is a nice lady.

Speaker 4 26:38

She's the perfect kind of crazy.

Speaker 1 26:40

Yes, I mean she did smash.

Speaker 5 26:43

Very attractive. How do you?

Speaker 1 26:44

smash the onboard stereo system too.

Speaker 2 26:45

She smashed it. I bet she was a softball player. She's very attractive. How do you smash the onboard stereo system too? She smashed it.

Speaker 1 26:48

I bet she was a softball player. She destroyed that car so much it had to be towed and they totaled it out after a mechanic said it would cost $12,465 to fix everything it was a 1986 Ford Ranger Right If you want to drive a junker.

Speaker 5 27:04

This is the perfect gal for you.

Speaker 1 27:06

For some reason, Stephanie was there when the tow truck driver showed up and told him she was the one that did it.

Speaker 4 27:13

Even better.

Speaker 5 27:15

She said miss, I did it she must be a stripper carrying all that glitter around.

Speaker 1 27:19

Who carries glitter?

Speaker 3 27:21

Nobody she also admitted in text to her boyfriend.

Speaker 1 27:25

later on, she claimed she did it because she's stressed out and pregnant because she's not sure who's the father.

Speaker 5 27:34

Oh.

Speaker 2 27:35

Jerry Springer show.

Speaker 5 27:36

I'm going to guess that might have started the fight.

Speaker 2 27:39

We need Montel.

Speaker 1 27:41

She said, she admitted to police that she broke the windshield, put glitter in the vents but tried to claim some of the other damages because the ex was overdue for an oil change.

Speaker 2 27:54

I'm overdue.

Speaker 1 27:55

I'm going to check his fucking oil. I've got his sticker.

Speaker 3 27:58

See if she has a Facebook profile See if she's got a.

Speaker 2 28:01

Facebook profile.

Speaker 5 28:03

I want to see a full body shot. I looked her up she's a school teacher, oh shit. I want to see a full body shot.

Speaker 2 28:06

I looked her up, she's a school teacher.

Speaker 1 28:07

Oh shit I want to see full body. Aaron's probably friends with her. So, here's the question I have on this story. Right, this is the after. Two beers spin on it. Have you ever seen an ex or someone that you were interested in and then you find out like they turn out, like here, like Miss Stephanie? Stephanie is a pretty girl, you know, in high school people probably chased out, especially kentucky, probably her brother and her dads and everybody right she looks pretty top heavy right she probably set up a few people right, but you read a story like this and have you ever saw?

Speaker 1 28:42

honestly, we're I'm 47. So I know I've done this. Where you sit back and you go, man, is that the boyfriend Dodged, a bullet Dodged a fucking bullet there.

Speaker 2 28:52

Oh, absolutely.

Speaker 4 28:53

Oh man.

Speaker 2 28:55

Can they see that?

Speaker 4 28:56

Yeah.

Speaker 1 28:57

That's the lady. Well, the boy, I wonder if that was.

Speaker 5 29:00

Oh, there they are.

Speaker 4 29:02

Yeah, look how happy she is. I'm sure he was okay with it too. Yeah, look how happy she is.

Speaker 1 29:07

I'm sure he was okay with it too. No, no, no, no, no, no. She's like I'm going to be the hot girl on.

Speaker 4 29:09

Glamour Shot. I'm good with it. It's fine, baby, come on back.

Speaker 2 29:15

You think that's it? Hey, send out the Facebook request. I've been meaning to have my inside of my car all glittered out.

Speaker 3 29:27

Hey couldn't.

Speaker 1 29:28

would you accept her Hell? No, Josh Hunter says no regerts.

Speaker 4 29:29

I love it.

Speaker 3 29:30

No regerts man, that is the guy, no regerts.

Speaker 4 29:31

Oh wow, Light it up. Did you see my comment? No?

Speaker 1 29:33

You had a comment.

Speaker 2 29:34

Right here I can save her. Oh my gosh.

Speaker 3 29:41

I wonder if you can find the car.

Speaker 2 29:43

That'd be kind of cool. The picture of the car Well. What Find the car? That'd be kind of cool, the picture of the car. Well, what do you think it was? It was probably a beat up Nissan Ford Ranger or something you really are on this.

Speaker 4 29:52

Ford Ranger AJ Ford Ranger.

Speaker 3 29:53

Purple Probably back in the purple old days.

Speaker 4 29:57

French Indian War.

Speaker 5 29:57

I bet it was a Honda Prelude.

Speaker 2 30:00

Or a Civic no no I got it, I got it. I got it.

Speaker 1 30:03

It was a.

Speaker 2 30:04

Pontiac Grand Am Chevy.

Speaker 1 30:05

Malibu, grand Prix, grand Prix. Aj would say a Chevy Malibu. Yeah, that's a girl's car though.

Speaker 5 30:10

What about a Beretta? What was my first car?

Speaker 1 30:12

No, the kind of car that this story probably involved. Oh yeah, I'm going to say Camaro. Pontiac Firebird, camaro kind of matches cars. All right, I'm just more. I mean, have you ever had an ex? You're thinking man. I'm glad I'm really out of that relationship.

Speaker 5 30:32

He's been to court. What do you think he's been to court for? Yeah, show him your punch card.

Speaker 2 30:36

I'm exactly glad he's got a punch card.

Speaker 4 30:39

Show him your punch card.

Speaker 2 30:40

Yeah, I do. They know me by name.

Speaker 5 30:44

The sheriff's when you have to go through there and he's like oh. Mr Screddy. Mr Screddy, you can leave your belt on this time.

Speaker 4 30:53

They got Screddy pyrotechnics poster on the wall Mini.

The Scorned Ex's $12,000 Car Revenge

Speaker 1 30:57

One more, one more and we're retiring your ID card up here.

Speaker 4 31:05

Yeah, someone said a Dodge Neon.

Speaker 5 31:09

It's like Marlboro Miles or Camel King Kevin.

Speaker 1 31:12

Johnson said we're going to send you a tent next week. Smiling in a mug shot. Ain't her first time there. One of the stories I did not include for this week there was a woman that was pulled over for a DUI and she had her head like this, with her tongue out, and that's the second time she's gotten a DUI and she had her head like this, with her tongue out, and that's the second time she's gotten a DUI and that's the second time she posed exactly like that. Lots of great stories in the US.

Speaker 5 31:35

Was that Richmond? So we like to play this game at home where we go through like the mug shots or whatever and we cover up what they're getting arrested for and we go name the charge. Name the charge.

Speaker 2 31:49

If it's Richmond, it's cocaine or drugs, it's drugs. That actually sounds like a fun game.

Speaker 5 31:54

It is so much fun. And I'm telling you what. Sometimes they surprise you. You're like, oh, I know what, that's, that, one's that. And it's like, oh no, just contempt of court.

Speaker 1 32:03

Can I be honest with you? I think Chomos. Have a look, chomos. Oh, I believe it. Yeah, you know what I'm talking about.

Speaker 3 32:10

No, are they the ones?

Speaker 1 32:11

that are like this 60 days in and when you see the guy that clocks in, he's in his mid-60s and he looks fine.

Speaker 4 32:17

What are you here for a fraud? The fuck you say.

Speaker 1 32:30

You mean his fred, you asshole. Let me see that paperwork, buddy. Let me see that paperwork. Convict, uh, convict, conflict. It's to me it's kind of like um see that paper. What's that game that ponder loves uh cards against humanity, oh yeah, but only you just whip out a card of someone on you pick the chart picture.

Speaker 4 32:46

Oh, it's almost like the guess who game. Yeah, oh, is this guy. Is he hunting for youngins? I will say click, click, click.

Speaker 2 32:54

I will say Ponder is very good at trivia 80s music yes, and drunk, and he would just say it before anybody else oh my god, it was like Rain man.

Speaker 1 33:04

Yeah, I've never seen nothing like that.

Speaker 4 33:06

We know, try keeping him to say it before anybody else. Oh my God, it was like Rain man. Yeah, I've never seen nothing like that. We know, try keeping it quiet in trivia. He's good we know, Pinball wizard Ponder.

Speaker 2 33:11

I'm on your team next time, bro.

Speaker 1 33:13

Speaking of guys that probably would have dated Miss Stephanie, this one actually comes to us from the great state of Indiana.

Speaker 4 33:20

It just happened yesterday Skitsky Literally yesterday.

Speaker 1 33:24

Michigan City area schools Just their fifth day of school of the year, they had to go on A e-learning day. Yesterday you heard this story. Apparently Someone broke into the school bus garage and stole catalytic converters From 20 buses.

Speaker 4 33:43

I thought that was in Cleveland too. It may be.

Speaker 1 33:47

They're just sitting there. It's like a big field of like deer just waiting to take us out.

Speaker 5 33:51

Those are a lot of money.

Speaker 1 33:53

Stolen catalytic converters are a huge business, so the thief or thieves really hit the jackpot. Can you imagine walking in yesterday morning going, hey, I got these big 20 catalytic converters I need? They're like hey, copper's, copper bro. The district didn't say if police had any leads, but there's no word on leads.

Speaker 2 34:15

We got them working in chips.

Speaker 1 34:17

This just goes to prove why maybe you should or maybe you shouldn't have shop class Right Michigan City, indiana, 20 of them 20 of them 20 catalytic converters.

Speaker 5 34:31

It's almost Michigan, michigan it's almost Gary, I say he, I'm just guessing because, mitch, I don't even know what a catalytic converter looks like. It's the chemical they had to have gone to a different area to go to the recycling center.

Speaker 4 34:46

I guess they know If they're getting them, they know somebody who will buy them Do electric buses have catalytic converters.

Speaker 2 34:52

I'm being serious no. So if they went to Northeastern they'd be shut out of luck.

Speaker 1 34:57

No, they're not all electric.

Speaker 2 34:59

Oh, I thought they got that grant and got all the electric buses.

Speaker 1 35:02

I knew Well as of at least two years, but they're only good for like so many years.

Speaker 2 35:08

They said after that they got to get new ones. Well, that's.

Speaker 1 35:10

America. Right there we can build shit that will last for 50 years and you don't think these car companies can make a car that lasts more than six.

Speaker 2 35:19

But could you imagine if those kids or whoever stole it, they went in there and they were all electric Like shit? You didn't do your research.

Speaker 1 35:26

I believe it has to do with emissions and it's from the exhaust and back to the.

Speaker 5 35:32

Yeah, I don't know much about I have people work on shit like that yeah, no, but what you were saying about things lasting longer?

Speaker 3 35:40

Our old-ass garage fridge is.

Speaker 5 35:42

Oh, my God no.

Speaker 1 35:44

It's like he's setting me up tonight. He is Softball Disney porn.

Speaker 2 35:49

Disney porn.

Speaker 3 35:49

Softball.

Speaker 5 35:57

Our old-ass garage fridge is probably going to outlive every one of our new appliances?

Speaker 1 35:59

Oh, absolutely it will. Oh well, yeah, it's anyway. Yeah, anyways they just love selling new cars every six, but let's be honest, most people can't go six years without a new car.

Speaker 5 36:09

I saw you looking straight at me, and it's normally three.

Speaker 2 36:12

It's three years, but, thank you, that's why they call them leases, yeah.

Speaker 4 36:16

That's what I did.

Speaker 2 36:17

Lease it out Gone. They get a lease.

Speaker 1 36:20

All right, Speaking of men, the guy I didn't even know this existed until today. Actually, you know you're having an interesting debate pre-show.

Speaker 4 36:31

Yeah.

Speaker 1 36:32

When you and Jeremy or me, specifically speaking in third person there, when Jeremy and I are debating who has the world's largest penis? Ooh, it wasn't him or I.

Speaker 4 36:44

Oh yeah, I'm nowhere near that. We're growers, not sellers.

Speaker 1 36:47

Yeah, the man with the world's largest junk recently broke his arm, and he says his enormous package is what caused it now now here's the thing there's actually a picture of this guy and what kind of picture are we looking at? I want to see his penis. This is pg-13 for sure. Um, you can look his name up he's a 41-year-old. His name is Matt Barr B-A-R-R, lives in London and apparently he's been in the news a lot over there.

Speaker 5 37:16

He's got a big wanker.

Speaker 1 37:18

His junk when it is fully engorged. Their word, not mine is 14.4 inches. Now this is him who recently hurt his shoulder.

Speaker 4 37:30

Yeah, what were you doing there, buddy? Wow, Take a break. Man Take a break. That shit is eating his pants.

Speaker 1 37:41

It looks like he has a backwards tail. Let me tell you it looks measurable. Hey.

Speaker 2 37:45

I'm glad that he has a big penis, because he has an ugly, ugly motherfucker you get one or the other buddy.

Speaker 4 37:53

You can't have both.

Speaker 1 37:54

It happens. Apparently, he was explaining that his massive manhood caused him to slip and fall in the shower. I've been there. It's so funny because I was getting out of the car earlier and I yelled ouch because you had to use so much soap on it and Amanda's like what happened. I said I squished one of my nuts. Oh yeah, I won my dick.

Speaker 4 38:15

It was my nuts that were fucking dropping with age to be fair, yeah, that was just the skin he's probably by himself all the time, because he could probably give his own oral.

Speaker 1 38:27

One of the issues with being so large is it's not exactly easy to see my feet. Welcome to having a belly bro.

Speaker 2 38:34

Yeah, have a belly bro.

Speaker 1 38:37

He said he was rushing to get ready for work and didn't see some shower gel in his tub.

Speaker 3 38:42

Because apparently his junk was blocking it Shower gel.

Speaker 1 38:46

He slipped on the soap, fell out of the shower, landed on his shoulder and ended up with two fractures. Good, I don't know how he fell. This guy has a permanent kickstand.

Speaker 2 38:54

You know that that dude is wearing skinny jeans every day.

Speaker 1 38:57

You know he is yeah, every single day he says this is just the latest way his extra large goods have caused him some trouble. Apparently, becoming aroused can make him lightheaded, yeah fucking thing Wow. All that blood going down there. Yeah, and it's made relationships hard, he recently told us, I bet it has been hard. He recently told a story about how he was with a woman once swung his hips too quickly and she ended up with a concussion.

Speaker 4 39:30

This dude's got a baby hammer. This guy is dragging. I just had two, but it was my belly that flipped around.

Speaker 2 39:35

He cannot flick it.

Speaker 1 39:37

He cannot flick it, he also went on vacation and wanted to swim at the pool in the resort. And it got stuck in the filter he wore board shorts with compression shorts underneath to keep everything tucked in, but it still wasn't enough. When he got out, he says his shorts were too short and clung you think he's circumcised.

Speaker 5 39:56

Oh my god.

Speaker 1 39:57

He'd lose three pounds. That's what I'm saying dude, you could make an umbrella.

Speaker 2 40:02

I know, he could make a very cool bat wing.

Speaker 1 40:09

You could make a parachute for one of the dwarfs.

Speaker 5 40:12

Oh my Jesus.

Speaker 1 40:13

The hair would be flopping through there.

Speaker 3 40:16

Let's see him in that picture. Outside that, he's a dog's soap.

Speaker 1 40:20

Well, he's.

Speaker 4 40:21

British. He's British, he's British. He looks like every British guy.

Speaker 5 40:24

He's a wanker with a large wanker.

Speaker 2 40:26

I can say this because I'm 50% British. He looks like every British guy. He's a wanker with a large wanker. I can say this because I'm 50 years old it looks like that wall out there, if he told me he was talking about that is wow.

Speaker 1 40:34

Look at that guy. They're not even like tight pants.

Speaker 4 40:38

I got my tight pants on.

Speaker 5 40:39

I was thinking it in my head. I know you are I got my tight pants.

Speaker 2 40:43

That guy right guy. He looks pretty tall though.

Speaker 1 40:45

Well, we can measure it. That's 14 inches of scale.

Speaker 2 40:49

Yeah.

Speaker 1 40:51

It's like measuring a map. I was going to say is it 14?

Speaker 2 40:56

That's soft.

Speaker 5 40:57

Which direction Is he?

Speaker 2 40:58

measuring that hard or soft?

Speaker 1 41:00

No 14.4 is fully gorged.

Speaker 2 41:02

Because I told you, you know, when we were talking about this earlier Dredd is supposedly the largest in the porn industry. I want to say his is like 12.

Speaker 1 41:12

I've never had a debate with a man about the size of the largest penis in the world.

Speaker 2 41:16

If you bring up John Holmes. He was, I think, the original 16.

Speaker 3 41:21

He was a white dude.

Speaker 1 41:24

And this guy's white.

Speaker 3 41:26

Wasn't he 16?

Speaker 2 41:27

inches, wasn't John Holmes 16? I don't know 16. I'm googling it, yeah take it all yeah.

Speaker 1 41:34

I'll google it for you guys. This is the search history.

Speaker 2 41:36

The NSA's like what the fuck's he into now right, hey, this will get you a package in the mail fucking dwarfs and John Holmes oh my god, this guy's crazy. Disney porn Could you imagine if that guy come trampling in your Disney Swinging?

Speaker 4 41:53

He's on our Disney cruise Just swinging. That's a big junk, fucking circle of life. Right there, baby Right.

Speaker 1 42:00

You can't wear sweatpants ever. You're done.

Speaker 3 42:03

Especially gray, ones.

Speaker 1 42:05

You're done. It wouldn't matter, it'd stick out. It'd look like he got poop pants on 18 inches.

Speaker 2 42:12

Says soft 12.5 to 18 inches hard.

Speaker 5 42:15

What.

Speaker 2 42:16

That's crazy.

Speaker 5 42:18

You guys realize that women's anatomy is not big enough to accommodate this.

Speaker 2 42:23

Yeah, you're only getting half of it in.

Speaker 1 42:24

Until. No, I believe it's funny Again things we hear about life.

Teen Train Thieves Learn YouTube Lessons

Speaker 5 42:30

Why'd you have to have your appendix removed?

Speaker 1 42:33

I believe a vaginal cavity. A vaginal cavity, I guess it would probably be the way to Cavity Cavity. It's only six to seven inches anyway.

Speaker 4 42:43

Yeah, but when you get 300 pounds pushing it, you're going to break some shit, son.

Speaker 3 42:48

Oh my.

Speaker 4 42:48

God Ribs. It might be three inches, looking like a button on a fur coat, but oh, that's funny Beer run. Oh yes, I need a beer.

Speaker 2 43:00

Did you say take out a rib?

Speaker 1 43:02

No, you wouldn't need two. With a dong that big, take out a rib if you there you go.

Speaker 5 43:06

All right, you wouldn't need to with a dong that big. Alright, do we have any more stories? Alright.

Speaker 1 43:11

Man, this is an interesting show tonight. I bet Annabelle would like it. Annabelle, I've had a sinus infection since you always have to sleep on your side. You fuck with.

Speaker 5 43:21

Annabelle, if you apologize to her.

Speaker 2 43:23

You'll get over that cold.

Speaker 4 43:24

Yeah, he won't do it, I ain't doing it.

Speaker 3 43:27

Maybe that's you'll get over that cold.

Speaker 2 43:28

Yeah, he won't do it. I ain't doing it. I ain't doing it. See, I ain't doing it.

Speaker 1 43:29

You tried to tell me to come. Maybe that's how we'll get famous.

Speaker 2 43:32

Dalton dies from a cold from Annabelle.

Speaker 1 43:35

Annabelle, let me ask you have a friend or a family member that let's say hypothetically, you have three sisters. Okay, total.

Speaker 4 43:45

Three girls Like I do, or anybody, okay, anybody.

Speaker 1 43:49

And one sister goes out and does everything. She picks the present out for Christmas.

Speaker 4 43:55

Okay, she wraps it. She's the one in charge of everything. Yeah.

Speaker 1 43:59

Then when you deliver it to the parents, all three.

Speaker 4 44:02

Everybody's name is on it.

Speaker 1 44:03

Take credit? Yeah Well, this is from us, because they gave you half the money for it. You see what I'm saying.

Speaker 5 44:09

Yeah, that's mostly how women do with yeah anyway.

Speaker 1 44:13

Okay.

Speaker 2 44:13

Yeah, you hear what I'm saying. By your own fucking gift.

Speaker 1 44:16

There is a potential story and I tried to research this today and I'm getting conflicting stories on this.

Speaker 3 44:23

Uh-oh.

Speaker 1 44:23

But it has to do with one of our own natives here in Richmond, indiana. Okay, went to our high school and that's Mr Wilbur Wright, specifically his brother, apparently Orville Orville, who I Redenbacher Great popcorn. Yeah, amazing guy. I said Redenbacher, I didn't realize Squirrel the Wright brothers. The rumor is that they didn't really pioneer flying together. The thought is that Wilbur basically did all the work, but he gave Orville half the credit, so his feelings wouldn't get hurt. I believe it.

Speaker 4 45:01

That's a good brother.

Speaker 3 45:02

Is he the younger brother?

Speaker 4 45:04

That's a good brother bro. I was like no, you got to take him along, Fuck man.

Speaker 1 45:06

All right, that's a good brother bro, your mama's like no you got to take him along.

Speaker 4 45:08

Fuck mama. All right, don't. That's a good brother man.

Speaker 1 45:10

Well, apparently I was reading about it. Orville is kind of an interesting cat, this guy. They think he had a touch of the tism, just found that out. Okay, he was a bit of a hipster Apparently, back then, wearing Argy, big deal Nice, and he liked wing tips. Really out there kind of guy. Now, what was also interesting, and I didn't even realize this Now, wilbur died early. He died in the early 1900s I think. He got typhoid fever or something, probably on a plane trip somewhere, yeah, anyway. Anyway, orville lived to be much older, he lived to almost 1948, I believe you guys can spot check me on that. But what's interesting about that? And I was telling AJ this on the drive here. I was like, do you realize that guy lived to see his invention that he came up with deliver atomic bombs and drop them on cities that instantly killed 100,000 people.

Speaker 5 46:06

Your invention, your invention, your invention, well, even, but it also took people to go visit their family they haven't seen for years.

Speaker 1 46:16

Well, I don't.

Speaker 5 46:18

I'm being the pessimist, are you?

Speaker 2 46:20

saying it's a bad thing that they invented that and he's like second-guessing himself.

Speaker 1 46:25

No, no, no, I'm saying more of. Can you imagine coming up with an invention that? Involves that much Exactly that you think to yourself all the things you're saying. It can free up travel. It can move masses but then it is used by someone to kill a quarter million people in two days, because that was what the guy that came up with TNT.

Speaker 4 46:47

He hated it.

Speaker 1 46:48

He wished he didn't. Orville Redenbacher 95.

Speaker 4 46:55

Or like even the Winchester gun. Yeah Same thing she hated it because you know how many people it killed.

Speaker 2 47:00

Well, in the French and Indian War they did it with bow and arrow, there we go.

Speaker 1 47:06

My lordy. Yeah, I'm looking into it more. I'm interested about this. Fortunately, Wilbur is the one that attended Richmond High School. Yeah, fuck you, Kitty Hawk.

Speaker 5 47:14

They were from Dittman, I thought. They both lived here, though in Richmond. I think they were down on North their birthplace is out on 38.

Speaker 2 47:21

Wilbur's is Okay.

Speaker 5 47:23

But they lived down around like North 12th, like in the star area.

Speaker 1 47:26

And then, um, well, they were. There was a difference in age, and Wilbur attended Richmond.

Speaker 3 47:31

Okay.

Speaker 4 47:32

And, uh, I think he may have graduated from Richmond, but they moved to Dayton, ohio, and that's when Orville and the only reason they went to North Carolina is because the wind here wasn't correct to make that plane fly.

Speaker 5 47:43

Whoa fly, whoa Okay, did you research?

Speaker 4 47:44

this oh, I heard about it. I listen to a ton of podcasts.

Speaker 5 47:49

Sometimes we just know things.

Speaker 2 47:52

No, I'm a fucking.

Speaker 4 47:52

He's a fucking genius bro. No, I ain't a genius. I know a lot of stupid shit. That's about it, did he frequently?

Speaker 1 47:58

ask people if they'd seen his base pill.

Speaker 3 48:01

No.

Speaker 1 48:03

No, I don't think he was special, I think he was autistic.

Speaker 4 48:06

Right, autism, a little touch, just a tad, a little tad yeah. Anyway, you'll have that All right. You guys want to do something fun to look into?

Speaker 1 48:14

Oh, this is an interesting story. It came out of South Carolina. Two teenagers were arrested there after they stole a vehicle to go on a joyride. What was the vehicle? It was a train.

Speaker 4 48:27

What? Yes, that's awesome.

Speaker 5 48:30

How the hell do you learn how to drive one?

Speaker 1 48:33

Oh, the internet, baby. They talk about it.

Speaker 4 48:36

Oh, they probably hopped on their phone and Googled it.

Speaker 1 48:38

They did it happened last Saturday.

Speaker 4 48:41

There you go.

Speaker 1 48:46

They broke into the railroad facilities in the evening and started on an engine that was connected to others. They drove it around the yard before taking it down the rail towards a neighboring town.

Speaker 4 48:58

They reportedly had gone on YouTube to learn how to start the train. That is awesome.

Speaker 3 49:02

There's everything on YouTube, you know.

Speaker 4 49:03

Mike, I will tell you this. My grandfather grew up in Indianapolis. His parents died when he was young, so his aunt raised him he loved trains, hopped on a train, ended up in St Louis, shouldered. Today I'm in St Louis. I'll be back later, that's wild. Oh my gosh yeah he loved it and hopped on them all the time.

Speaker 1 49:23

My grandmother who lives on or lived on Northwest E here in Richmond. There's that train track that now I think is primarily used just to park like cargo ship and stuff. But my mother tells stories that when trains would come through town the homeless would come to her door and she would feed them Really, and it was different people and obviously they never came into the house. You know, but you hear about it there are markings they put out.

Speaker 4 49:54

Is it? Yeah, they will mark a house if it's safe or if they will provide food. There's different markings they put on shit.

Speaker 5 50:01

Isn't that wild, yeah I mean it was a different world. You are a wealth of freaking knowledge tonight.

Speaker 1 50:06

My whole family grew up with trains.

Speaker 4 50:11

They just go to St Louis for the day he did. He went and joined the military when he was 16.

Speaker 1 50:13

Yeah, Well, apparently these kids, they learned how to watch it or start it on YouTube. The problem is, they didn't know how to stop it.

Speaker 3 50:21

No, Because on the way back from the toy ride the track switched.

Speaker 1 50:26

Oh shit. They ran into several cars on the same line, forcing them to derail and causing significant damage. They were charged with burglary, grand larceny, malicious damage and willful destruction of railroad property. How old were they? It says teen, so they're minors. Their names haven't been released as a result.

Speaker 5 50:46

Well, 19 is still an adult. If they were of age 18, they would have put their name out.

Speaker 1 50:53

Well, I don't know that they'll get off, but here's the wow part Stop giggling yeah. This is when you can tell I hang out with 12-year-old minded people.

Speaker 3 51:06

Right, you get off At 14.

Speaker 1 51:08

Right, they detain after train ride.

Speaker 3 51:15

Ain't nothing wrong with that?

Speaker 2 51:16

They'll just get some juvie Well here's the question.

Speaker 5 51:20

I feel like some of those charges might actually like constitute. I mean it should be the same as stealing a car right it's not even just the charges it comes.

Speaker 1 51:27

Who is responsible for repayment? So can you imagine that your son, 15-year-old, without with his buddy, a 15-year-old, steals a fucking locomotive and they come home and they tell you that you're I mean, I don't know that you can be held responsible for what if they caused a quarter million dollars in damage? Jesus Think, jesus, think about that. I mean, those trains can't be cheap. No, you never see them for sale.

Speaker 4 51:50

No, believe me, I tried. They don't want to give me nothing.

Speaker 1 51:54

Oh, that's just wild to me.

Speaker 5 51:56

But who left it unoccupied, with keys in it?

Speaker 4 52:00

Yeah, you know what?

Speaker 5 52:03

We're going to show some liability here. We're going to transfer liability.

Speaker 1 52:05

That reminds me of a skit SNL did one time and it was about people that had frivolous lawsuits and it was Chris Farley and he goes. I know the construction site said no trespassing, but when you were as drunk as I was, you couldn't read that sign. Alright, here's our next one. This one comes to us from the great state of Tennessee. A 51-year-old man in Tennessee named DeCarlo Pitchford shot his wife last month. They aren't a lot of details.

Speaker 5 52:35

On purpose or not, we don't know that.

The Man With The World's Largest Problem

Speaker 1 52:38

But that's not even the interesting part of the story. That's not the best part. A lot of the details on what was happening wasn't readily available, but the wife told police that he was blocking her from leaving the house, so it doesn't sound good. Now, when she tried to get past him, he apparently shot her in the abdomen and he said I told you to stop playing with me. This sounds like something an 8-year-old would say to a 6-year-old Don't play with me Now. She clearly needed medical attention, so he drove her to the hospital, but well, he took his time.

Speaker 2 53:10

He stopped on the way to get a beer All the road tracks, you'll be alright I gotta get a beer.

Speaker 1 53:17

Imagine shooting your wife, taking her to the hospital and being like, hey, can I stop and get a six pack. I'm probably going to be busy for a minute. I'm going to go ahead and get a pack, I'm probably going to jail.

Speaker 4 53:26

He probably packed it good for her, I'm going to get a sixer.

Speaker 1 53:28

He was charged with second degree attempted murder, domestic assault.

Speaker 4 53:31

She didn't die, so it's alright.

Speaker 1 53:33

And felon possession of a firearm. I just can't.

Speaker 2 53:37

It had to be a small caliber gun.

Speaker 1 53:39

It's still the fact that you're like he probably shot her with a .22.

Speaker 2 53:42

He's like.

Speaker 5 53:42

You good you good when you good, you good. When you say abdomen, I don't know that she had many abs, I'm guessing.

Speaker 2 53:49

She might have been fat, might have been cushioned in there and like didn't bounce around If he's got time to stop for a beer. Something stopped him and I'm not shaming. I'm not shaming at all. Maybe it was a clean shot that went straight through him out the back Right.

Speaker 1 54:02

And he knew it was a clean shot. I feel like there's times not to want to stop to get a beer and I feel like shooting someone is probably eyeing the list.

Speaker 5 54:08

That's probably yeah, but I'm pretty sure if my old man was shooting me in the abdomen I'd just be like let's just call 911.

Speaker 2 54:16

But why would you get in a car with this dude?

Speaker 1 54:19

I'm going to go out on a limb and say See, baby.

Speaker 4 54:21

I didn't want to do that. I love you baby.

Speaker 1 54:30

You know what She'll get out and she'll probably still be with him. Jeremy, we're going down some weird spots. We're not going there.

Speaker 2 54:33

I'm just saying like getting in a car with a dude that just shot you, that's not cool.

Speaker 1 54:37

Maybe she didn't get in on her own accord.

Speaker 4 54:41

I'm going to tell you what If somebody shot me and said hey, we're going to need some ring video.

Speaker 2 54:43

We're going to go to the hospital.

Speaker 4 54:44

I'm like okay.

Speaker 2 54:45

We're going to need some ring video.

Speaker 4 54:47

I love how I'm going to stop and get a beer first.

Speaker 1 54:49

I'm like, give me one. This is America and this is why I love this right. We're debating whether or not she made the right decision getting in the car, not the fact that he's shot. He's the one that stopped Victim blamers. Hey, don't mind bleeding and screaming in the car. Yeah, she'll be alright. She probably just needs some minks.

Speaker 4 55:16

She's usually bleeding and screaming anyway, so what's the difference?

Speaker 1 55:19

Classic victim blamer.

Speaker 5 55:22

She's bleeding and screaming in the car. She just met the guy in London.

Speaker 2 55:25

I hope he didn't have a nice car, because you know there's a lot of blood.

Speaker 4 55:28

It's a 96 pony right sunfire neon sunfire.

Speaker 5 55:33

Yeah, oh, I haven't heard of those, for I bet you he's already stolen her catalytic converter and all the copper wire

Speaker 4 55:39

and the copper wire.

Speaker 1 55:39

All right, well, I think that's gonna wrap it up. Here's the uh subjects I didn't want to cover this week, because I just don't give two shits uh--oh. But, apparently people want to talk about them, so I'm going to bring them up and see if you guys care at all Male cheerleaders in the NFL Don't care. Don't care either. Hated it Cracker Barrel. Change this logo, don't care.

Speaker 5 56:00

Don't care, stupid, but whatever Doesn't affect my life, I don.

Speaker 1 56:03

Why do you call it stupid Just because you don't think they?

Speaker 4 56:06

should have changed it.

Speaker 5 56:07

Why would you need to? Well, they changed the interior so they might as well change it.

Speaker 4 56:11

Yeah, they serve alcohol now. Yeah, they do. They changed the logo, though because it was racist.

Speaker 2 56:14

Is that what they said?

Speaker 1 56:15

Well, I think that's what some people are saying, yeah, and.

Speaker 2 56:18

I think that's why they did it, and so they caved, and it's bullshit.

Speaker 4 56:21

It's your logo dude, I'm not there for the logo, I'm there for the food. That's right, and they serve beer now that, and a candy bar is out front. That's all I care about.

Speaker 1 56:32

Yeah, man, you can play the jump game.

Speaker 2 56:33

We got some pretty cool shit up front.

Speaker 5 56:35

Yeah, they do, man, that shit's overpriced. I still just want to go play the little checkers on the rug.

Speaker 1 56:43

I still like when people say that was the second name. It wasn't going to originally be Cracker Barrel.

Speaker 4 56:48

Yeah.

Speaker 1 56:49

It was going to be Honky Bucket, honky Bucket.

Speaker 2 56:53

Even better Wow.

Speaker 3 56:55

Honky.

Speaker 4 56:56

Bucket.

Speaker 5 56:56

Cracker Barrel. Now they need to change the logo.

Speaker 1 57:02

Here's another one, I didn't give two shits about American Eagle and whoever was saying their jeans. Who cares man?

Speaker 5 57:11

What happened.

Speaker 1 57:11

Hey, I'm going to tell you what.

Speaker 4 57:13

Since I was 18, I could never wear American Eagle. Anyways, I had to order my shit online.

Speaker 5 57:18

I always had to upsize on their size.

Speaker 4 57:20

Believe me, growing up you were there. I had black, or blue, blue and deep blue. Can I get stonewashed? No, you're fat.

Speaker 5 57:29

It's so true, and those things are so thick that if you brushed your thighs together you might start a match.

Speaker 1 57:34

Right, and then they give you shirts that like not only do you know you're big, they put big dog on it.

Speaker 4 57:40

Yeah right.

Speaker 1 57:41

You're like can't you just put normal size?

Speaker 4 57:43

maybe above average size Medium dog, Big dog man I'm fat.

Speaker 1 57:49

Alright, I think that's going to wrap it up, but I got that big Johnson shirt. I love those. Licker in the front, poker in the rear. Those are the best shirts ever. Oh man, I'm not even intoxicated, it's the minks.

Speaker 3 58:04

It's the minks that get you going.

Speaker 4 58:07

I finished it. Look at him just making a face Everybody get down there.

Speaker 1 58:12

I bet you people that drink that live in a tent.

Speaker 4 58:15

Do they have other flavors besides? Shut your mouth. Shut your mouth.

Speaker 2 58:21

Or ride a train.

Speaker 4 58:23

They can't ride trains anymore. Do they have other flavors besides pink Mango, peach, mango?

Speaker 2 58:28

Yes, they do, I think so, okay, please, when I say live in a tent.

Speaker 1 58:30

I don't mean at a campground, I meant like in an urban area.

Speaker 4 58:33

Maybe next time We'll try a different flavor next time.

Speaker 1 58:35

I got to tell you that's what. Anyway, we're not good yeah.

Speaker 5 58:38

I'm not a wine person, but but thank you.

Speaker 1 58:46

Bottle Shop yeah, thank you, bottle. I went there one time for a bourbon tasting, yeah, or a bourbon drop. It was awesome, the store is amazing.

Speaker 4 58:53

I love the fact it's local owned and it's been around forever.

Speaker 1 58:55

Yeah yeah. But you see people coming there right when it opens and you know why they're there right when it opens.

Speaker 4 59:00

Oh, that's the best part about living in New Paris.

Speaker 5 59:02

Knock off that hangover Well yeah, twin dwellers.

Speaker 1 59:08

You know, there's a guy. 12.

Speaker 4 59:10

Twins.

Speaker 3 59:11

There's a guy I knew.

Speaker 4 59:12

Parasite by Stop it.

Speaker 1 59:14

That's a lot to say.

Speaker 4 59:14

Fast the gas station there get me a couple Cokes in the morning. He's here every morning Getting six Bud.

Speaker 1 59:19

Light.

Speaker 4 59:20

Bottles. Yeah, aluminum can Bottles.

Speaker 5 59:23

Those are nice. You know how you Never get a hangover.

Speaker 1 59:26

Never stop drinking.

Speaker 4 59:26

Never stop drinking baby here, stop drinking. Baby, here we go, yeah, my grandfather lived by that. All right.

Speaker 1 59:32

Probably shouldn't do a show called After Two Beers.

Speaker 5 59:33

Right here I am. All right, anyway.

Speaker 1 59:38

All right, I want to make sure we thank everybody for tuning in again this week we went on what Did I miss? A good joke, nope, no. We went on quite the path this week. We went everywhere, from getting catfished by your own significant other to the world's biggest penis, to choo-choo train rides by little kids.

Speaker 3 59:58

I'm glad you didn't talk about relationships.

Speaker 5 1:00:01

I can't wait to see this AI picture. You know what?

Speaker 1 1:00:04

Yeah, the AI, yeah, and relationships. It's funny because the question is cheating, right, and what's cheating to one person isn't cheating to another. You hear what I'm saying? Eating ain't cheating. Eating ain't cheating, sucking ain't fucking.

Speaker 3 1:00:25

Oh my.

Speaker 2 1:00:25

God, wow, that's what.

Speaker 4 1:00:27

I said you learned that from Bill Clinton, that's.

Speaker 3 1:00:30

Bill Clinton. I did not have relations with that woman. That's what I said. You learned that from Bill Clinton. That's Bill Clinton you learned that from Bill Clinton.

Speaker 1 1:00:34

No, what I'm saying is it isn't just intercourse, that's cheating Right, there's all kinds of shit.

Speaker 2 1:00:41

There's all kinds of shit.

Speaker 1 1:00:43

And you just have to be able to communicate with your person and explain hey, these are what is off limits for me. Intent it could be any. Here's the thing. Why does it have to be with another person?

Speaker 4 1:00:56

And I don't mean animals. Why does it have to be in tents? Oh you say.

Speaker 1 1:01:01

Because you're getting this wine, so apparently only the homeless can cheat.

Speaker 2 1:01:06

Going mild in the tent yeah.

Speaker 1 1:01:09

All right, anywho, anyway, yeah, lots of shit going on in that one. We're going to leave the rest of that alone.

Speaker 4 1:01:15

I love you guys, I love you buddy, all right.

Speaker 1 1:01:17

Thanks again to our buddy, kevin Shook, here at Global Media Enterprise for setting this up. Thanks to the Bottle Shop for this amazing bottle of minks. Can't wait to pour the rest of that down the drain, oh my god, maybe try a different flavor. Yeah, that'd be good, just saying. You still keep drinking it Because I'm a trooper. You know what it reminds me of? When I was a kid, I tasted my own urine. Did you just say I tasted my own urine?

Speaker 1 1:01:46

I thought you were going to say that no, what the hell, I can't take cough medicine, like I've been fighting this cough medicine shit, and I've been. I can take shots of, you know, rumpelmints, rumpelmints, tequila it doesn't cherry NyQuil and I'm like I got dry heaves and shit. And it reminds me of when I was a kid I had to get I used to get um strep throat and they would give you the oral and I would make my mom mix it with coke so I could take it my mom was my first bartender right, like I had her make it.

Speaker 3 1:02:22

Yeah, that's what I meant.

Speaker 1 1:02:23

It was coca-cola it's what you know, jim marcus russell got hooked on basically right, right, but anyway, that's what it tastes like. It tastes like oh yeah.

Speaker 4 1:02:35

That's nice there it is.

Speaker 1 1:02:37

Maybe it's an acquired taste, all right.

Speaker 4 1:02:42

But anyway, they got other great products down there. That'll put hair in your tongue.

Speaker 1 1:02:46

And uh, but for $11, 32 proof. I'm sure there's a bunch of high school kids that are going to be begging their uncles to go buy that for them. Yeah.

Speaker 4 1:02:53

Yeah.

Final Thoughts: Life Is Hard, Enjoy It

Speaker 1 1:02:53

And they're going to pass one around the parking lot, like I might have done when I was in high school.

Speaker 2 1:02:57

Purple passion, purple passion.

Speaker 1 1:02:59

Passing around until it's gone.

Speaker 2 1:03:00

We ought to get some purple passion up here.

Speaker 5 1:03:02

Oh man, a two-liter bottle? Yes, that would be amazing.

Speaker 2 1:03:06

Some boons Some boons.

Speaker 4 1:03:08

Brass monkey.

Speaker 1 1:03:09

Yeah, some Bartles and James, ooh, yes, yes, all right, let's wrap this up, see you. All right. Thanks again to everybody that tuned in. I think I've said that already. Thanks to our Patreon sponsors.

Speaker 1 1:03:21

Yeah, Love you guys, and you know we say it at the end of every show. We are really just here once every weeks just to try to lighten the mood. Life is hard, life is tough and you know there's a lot of important shit going on in the world and we're just trying to make you maybe think about something else for an hour Right. And we've got like 150, 175 of these things on iTunes, Spotify, SoundCloud Go out and listen to them.

Speaker 4 1:03:48

There's about 25 about the French-Indian War. That's freaking awesome.

Speaker 2 1:03:50

I've about 25 about the French Indian War. That's freaking awesome yeah.

Speaker 1 1:03:53

I've heard more about the French and Indian War than I've heard the word we should have French and Indian War historical day oh god, it's not.

Speaker 4 1:04:01

I mean what we'll all dress up like the.

Speaker 1 1:04:03

French and Indian War yeah, that's gonna come off racist we'll get some tents, tps, tps.

Speaker 2 1:04:10

Well, maybe 10's pregnant, maybe I don't know.

Speaker 1 1:04:12

Anyway, squirrel squirrel anyway, we're here just to try to entertain, lighten the mood and realize maybe that we're all in this together it's we're all fucked, so might as well enjoy ourselves.

Speaker 1 1:04:26

Have a good time say that at the end of every show and we say it at the end of every show, and that's why we're here. It is, um, you know, make sure you're taking care of each other out there. Yes, people, uh, they have their times, they have their moments. People get down and, um, you know, a big one for you. You guys went through a family change this week your son, goes off to college.

Speaker 4 1:04:45

Yeah, that's hard for people, you know, and we have five boys, so we have to do this five more times. Well, four more four because one's gonna join the military, pretty sure.

Speaker 1 1:04:55

Ride a train, yeah he's gonna join the military, we're pretty sure. Yeah, yeah, hey, nothing wrong with that. No, we need that too. But, um, just take care of each other and if you see someone out there you think they're struggling a little bit, just know that they may actually be. Just reach out to them, ask them. How? Ask them. Hey, do you want to come have a sandwich somewhere? Maybe you just want to watch a podcast with me.

Speaker 4 1:05:15

Come have a cabbage roll or whatever. There you go, man.

Speaker 1 1:05:18

Come on. So we appreciate you all. Thank you, kevin. Yes, thank you. We love all of you guys as well, and I guess, without further ado, gibbler, puddin, we'll talk to them all next time.

Speaker 3 1:05:29

After two beers Take me home, take me on home.