Finding Comfort in the Discomfort: Amanda Loewen's Rise to Jiu-Jitsu Mastery and Beyond

Sometimes life throws you onto an unexpected path that leads to personal greatness—just ask Amanda Loewen, Oregon's first female third-degree Jiu-Jitsu black belt. On the Bamboo Lab podcast, we had the honor of chatting with Amanda about her extraordinary journey from horseback trails to the disciplined mats where she mastered the art of submission wrestling. As she shared her story, I was reminded of the power of timing and how the universe has a way of aligning things perfectly when we least expect it.

This episode is a treasure trove of life lessons as Amanda opens up about the transitions that have shaped her, including the tough decision to seek healthier environments and relationships. Her resilience in overcoming challenging obstacles is not just inspiring; it's a profound reminder of the importance of trusting the process. We also delve into the importance of self-worth, the humbling experiences of competition, and how teaching others can amplify our own growth and understanding.

Amanda's insights extend far beyond the Jiu-Jitsu mat. They include the courage to pursue one's passions, the value of therapy, and why it's crucial to listen to those who have walked before us. As she gears up for her next chapter as a sheriff's deputy and plans to open her own 10th Planet Jiu-Jitsu studio, Amanda exemplifies that it's never too late for new challenges. So, join the conversation, share your thoughts, and let's continue inspiring each other to reach for our personal best, just as Amanda does every day.

Please explore these amazing sponsors of Amanda:

-VHTS (very hard to submit) 

use code Amanda10 for a discount

-Garden of life 

-S4L Equestrian Team

Non profit link to donate or sponsor: https://www.zeffy.com/en-US/donation-form/5b7a2740-30a0-4be3-9f5a-b105dedc2b3c

Website: S4Lranch.com 

Transcript

Intro: 0:00

Hello and welcome to the Bamboo Lab podcast with your host, Peak Performance Coach, Brian Bosley. Are you stuck on the hamster wheel of life, spinning and spinning but not really moving forward? Are you ready to jump off and soar? Are you finally ready to sculpt your life? If so, you've landed in the right place. This podcast is created and broadcast just for you, All of you strivers, thrivers and survivors out there. If you'd like to learn more about Brian and the Bamboo Lab, feel free to reach out to explore your true peak level at wwwBambooLab3.com.

Brian: 0:42

Okay, hey, everyone, welcome to this week's show. I think you're going to really enjoy today's guest. We have Amanda Lohan on here today and you know, probably four weeks ago I reached out to several friends of mine, some clients, some previous podcast guests, and I said, hey, this year I kind of want to get recommendations for people and a mutual friend of mine, amanda Justin Samples, who was back I believe he was June 12th of 2023. He shot an amazing episode that has done incredibly well on the show. It was episode number 92, I believe, and it was titled Outlast the Bastards by Justin Samples, and he's like, dude, you got to reach out to Amanda.

Brian: 1:25

She's an amazing Jiu Jitsu instructor out of Oregon. Here. She's worked with my boy, jackson, I think it was, and so I'm giving her a minute. Let's connect us. We did, we connected, we talked last week and it's just going to be so much fun. I had such a cool conversation last week, so I'm just going to share a little bit about her. Amanda is a third degree Jiu Jitsu black belt, a 10th planet black belt, and she was actually the state of Oregon's first female to be awarded the black belt. So, without further ado, my new friend, amanda, welcome to the Bamboo Lab podcast Hi.

Amanda: 2:00

Thank you so much for having me.

Brian: 2:02

And what did I promise you? That after the show, when we're done airing, you're going to say that was so much fun Exactly.

Brian: 2:08

So let's make it fun so I don't have to go back on my word, All right. So I got a chance last week everybody out there to talk to Amanda for I think, 30, 35 minutes or so on the phone. I was just so impressed with such a cool conversation so I got to know a little bit about her, but not a lot. So I'm going to be learning as you guys are at the same time. So, Amanda, can you share with us a little bit about where you're from, your childhood, who or what inspired you to do what you're doing now? Just whatever you want to share about so we can get a good framework of who you are.

Amanda: 2:39

Oh, man, it depends on how deep you want to go into my childhood.

Brian: 2:44

Deep as you want to go.

Amanda: 2:47

I was born in California and I grew up in Sanger, california, which is kind of a better country. It's near Fresno or kind of the Clovis area, so Central Valley and I had a good but I would say probably pretty tough childhood was some regards to my dad, but I absolutely loved where I grew up and the opportunities that I had as far as being able to really connect with animals and riding horses and not having to be super close to a bunch of neighbors. We had a couple acres growing up and I just absolutely loved just being outside all the time with my brothers and my sister and stuff. After that we ended up moving closer to Fresno and then when I was about maybe 20 or so, I ended up moving to Portland, oregon. So around 2007 or so, and I've been in Oregon since.

Brian: 4:00

Well, you missed me. I was in Portland in 98, the year I think I spent like six or seven months living in Oregon, portland. I think we talked about this. I think that was 90. No, it was like 99, 2000. I was there. I was there during the what do you call it? The 2000 madness, when everything was going to supposedly shut down. I think I was out there when that, on January 1st or December 31st, when it was what did they call that?

Amanda: 4:24

When the Y2K yeah.

Brian: 4:25

Y2K. I think that's when I was out there. I think I was in a hotel when all that went down.

Amanda: 4:29

Those are the good times yeah. Well it was fun.

Brian: 4:36

Back then I had my very first micro beer I think it was Widenburg Brothers, I think it was the name of the brewery and their HEPA vise and I had out there and I couldn't believe what I was drinking. I was used to Bud Light, Coors Light, just your big beer, and I'm like this is the best thing I've ever had. To this day I still find it out here in Michigan, still drinking it when I do or when I can find it.

Amanda: 4:58

Yeah, Portland has changed a little bit. I find myself out here in Central Oregon now and I couldn't be happier.

Brian: 5:09

Good, Are you still avid outdoors? Horses and animals?

Amanda: 5:14

Oh, absolutely. I've got a horse myself, and we are working on getting better every day.

Brian: 5:25

That's awesome. When did you start in the training of Jujitsu?

Amanda: 5:32

Oh, jujitsu. I started in 2009. Wow, at the time I had no idea what Jujitsu was. I hadn't really watched any MMA fights or UFC. I happened to work at a tropical fish store and then around the corner from that fish store was my first gym. I would just walk past and I would see these people in geese or kimonos. I thought they were doing karate and I was like, well, maybe I should do karate too. I'm just really, really glad no offense to people that do karate, but I'm really glad that it wasn't karate, that it was submission wrestling, basically. I went in, talked to a couple people. They said I should come check it out. At that time in 2009, it was more of survival of the fittest. You would just go into a gym and maybe do a class or go over some moves and then you would spar. I just got thrown into sparring afterwards, I would say, because I'm a very persistent or stubborn individual. I knew that I wanted to come back after just getting completely moped on the floor.

Brian: 6:57

I got to tell you, as you sit me your headshot and I always have guests send me a picture I said, pick a picture that you like and send it to me. That's what I'm going to use for the promo and for the podcast picture. This was definitely the most badass one I've ever got. It's probably my favorite to date. You guys will all see it when you see it now, when you're listening to the podcast the tattoos, the black belt, the black I guess title belt, the black shirt Then you look at your face.

Brian: 7:30

It's like that's not what I expected when I scrolled up and saw it. I expected just scars on your face and more tattoos. It just got this amazing smile like the most kind eyes. Then you look down. It's like this dichotomy of grace and grit at the same time. It's really a cool picture, man. It really is. What was it about for you when you were younger, growing up? Martial arts is a pretty tough thing to go into. Jiu-jitsu, obviously, is one of the more difficult ones. You're submitting and you got all these strong rules and everything. Was there a point in your life that you thought maybe not as a child, but maybe later on that you thought something had triggered you or inspired you, other than just walking by a dojo one day.

Amanda: 8:23

I'm not sure. Growing up, I wasn't an athlete. In elementary school I played soccer, but it was not like a traveling team or a phenomenal team by any means. I really wanted to play sports in high school, but at that time my mom was a single mom and she just couldn't afford to do that kind of stuff. Jiu-jitsu was, I think, the first really physical thing that I was able to do. I don't know. I absolutely fell in love with it as I was training. In the beginning I was going to school full-time and I was working full-time and I ended up just quitting it all. I don't know if I recommend that for everyone, but I definitely think that following your passions or things that you're in love with is really important. I knew that I would find a way to make it work. It's this puzzle that you'll never be able to completely solve. I think that's what keeps me coming back.

Brian: 9:35

So when did you earn your black belt?

Amanda: 9:38

I earned my black belt in 2014. I went from white to black in five years, which is pretty quick. For a lot of people, it takes 10 to 12 years to earn their black belt, but I don't know it was. I didn't choose. You know, you, you can't just ask for your black belt. I definitely didn't ask for for any of my belts. Sometimes I wish that, that I had gotten it a bit later, but you, you're constantly kind of growing into your belts, you know, and a lot, of, a lot of folks say like when they get their black belt. So you're basically kind of starting over.

Brian: 10:26

So I, you know. It's interesting. I don't know if you feel this way, I'm assuming you do and one of the things that I learned when watching my son get his black belt and karate was it was all. It was never about aggressiveness, it was, you know, his, his sense, a without. He was start every class at the dojo by saying what's the, what's the best way to win a fight, and everybody was scream, walk away. And I. That's the thing I learned watching this progression. Then he went into. He was trained by a world-class kickboxer. Now he is trained by, goes to a gym where a lot of the Olympic boxing team trains and it's the same kind of mantra throughout.

Brian: 11:00

You know you get a few knuckleheads in there that are there because they want to beat somebody up, they want to beat someone's ass on the street and they want to just be a tough guy or tough girl, but the vast majority that were the most respectful people I had ever been around at these tournaments and into classes and everybody was just amazingly respectful and it's so cool to watch now my son, who's 21, because he's able to carry that confidence with them, you know. But at 21 he has a lot of test-os drones, so sometimes it can get the better of him and he has to hold that back. When you walk down the street, I'm assuming and I don't know because I don't have a belt in anything that you walk with the sense of humble confidence that I'm probably gonna be able to take care of myself in the vast majority of situations. Is that true?

Amanda: 11:47

Absolutely. I mean, I definitely feel Confident when I'm walking around, but I don't know. I also I Don't go out very often, I don't know. So many told me just like well, don't go stupid places with stupid people and do stupid things so Best advice anybody could give anyone out there.

Amanda: 12:13

Absolutely. But um, yeah, I mean, I walk a ton, I'm always making sure that I'm I'm being aware of my surroundings. But also, yeah, I feel that if I needed to defend myself that I would be able to. But also, again, I'm not and I never have sought out like a fight. So, no, very good at de-escalation and just avoiding, not great situations.

Brian: 12:44

Well, amanda, when I was in college, I was. I was the opposite. I couldn't fight my way. I played rugby in college. I was fairly Athletic, you know, and but I wasn't a great athlete. I was. I was athletic enough, I was 215 pounds maybe. So I was, you know, fairly bigger guy and I was the opposite. I'd go out after I'd fought on the rugby pitch, I fought after the games, I fought at bars and I got my ass kicked, probably 75% of the time, and I deserved every one of those times. So I it's to kind of see that that, that that difference between like people like you and my son, and what the way I was when I was, you know, 21, that's my son is now. I wish I would have gotten into some type of martial arts. It probably would have saved me a few stitches along the way.

Amanda: 13:30

Oh, yeah, do you, yeah, do you get to, really humbles a person and it definitely checks the ego quite a bit. We've we've definitely had some, some real characters come into the gym. You know some people. They're just like, yeah, I want to, you know, I want to in the May fight, or I had some street fights and it's like, oh, that's, you know, that's cool, good, good for you. You can, you know, come in role and we'll give you a bit of a reality check.

Brian: 13:59

I imagine Justin and Kara's son was probably pretty good, naturally because Justin is a hell of an athlete and Kara is too. I mean, they're both athletes. I think any child, if you train to them, must have been had some pretty good there they come from. They, those boys, come from a pretty good gene pool.

Amanda: 14:16

Oh no, absolutely Jackson is. Yeah, I Tried to. You know I would tell him and I tell his parents. I'm like you know, I don't have try not to have favorites in kids class, but if I did, jackson would definitely be at the top. He was just very tenacious and he, he worked so hard and, man, I get it, because if you lose a match, it's just it can be devastating sometimes. But um, he would always get back in there and he would just try his hardest and he's, you know, adorable little redhead on top of everything.

Brian: 14:52

He is, I, I don't think I've ever met him. I remember when he was born, ever when they told me now that they were expecting, and I don't think I've ever met him. I float there a few years ago to do a speech for Justin's clients, but I don't think the boys were there. I don't think. I don't think they were. I see pictures of them all the time. So, so the next I have a question for you. So and I always put this on the I always ask it like what is the greatest thing you've learned in the last 12 months? But I don't really care about the time frame, but in the recent future, in the recent past, I should say, amanda, what do you think is one of the greatest learnings you've had in life that you could share with us?

Amanda: 15:28

Oh, man that's such a. I've been thinking about this a lot, but I think, more recently for myself, is that Timing is everything, and for me it's like God's timing is the best timing. I think sometimes we try to force some things on our own a lot and Maybe it's just not meant to be and and we get frustrated with that. But I think there really is A time and a place for everything. So I don't know, I've just been really really feeling that lately, just moving to a new place and I'll be starting kind of a new career here pretty soon. But everything, I think, has a reason as to why it's happened or why it's happening, and I'm just, yeah, I just feel super, super grateful and very, very thankful as to where I'm at right now and just remembering to be present.

Brian: 16:38

You know again timing, because I sat down last Thursday and at a beer garden with this amazing lady who is health I'm at right now I'm shooting this podcast, recording this podcast, and I was telling her that in the last, I would say, two months I've been getting it I couldn't think of the word. She said epiphanies. I'm like, okay, let's go with that one, and I don't necessarily always follow epiphanies and I guess I should say this I never have. I have spent, I've been doing what I do for 27 years.

Brian: 17:08

I'm in my 28th year of coaching for myself, you know, for clients and I always felt like I was so always trying to put a square peg in her own hole. I was always trying to rush things, hurry things, hurry the success, hurry the money, hurry the impact, and that is epiphanies. It was probably November of last year and literally, Amanda, I'm not joking I've gotten thousands since now. As of today, which is February 13th or 12th, 12th, I guess, I don't know what it is 13th, I think I have gotten thousands and whether it would be a meme that I read or something in a book or something I'll hear somebody say, or in my dreams, and it was all about let go of the wheel. I got this yeah yeah, exactly, yeah exactly.

Brian: 17:51

And so I literally sat down one day because I had. I found out why I guess I had. I think I had COVID three weeks ago because a lot of people I know had it and we had the same thing. I had a headache and then. But then I had a day of high anxiety and all these weird bad dreams and, like all my family members had the same thing.

Brian: 18:11

But when I was having this day of anxiety, I didn't know what it was. I never had anxiety before and I remember I looked and I said take the wheel, just take it. You're the captain now and I'm just going to focus on what I do really well. And that was probably three weeks ago and it was three weeks ago when I said this, and maybe three, two or three weeks and I'm going to be this is the weird thing. And all of a sudden I started getting people calling me in. Like I've gotten a couple of calling people saying, hey, I really would like to work with you, I'd like you to coach me, I'd like you to get this engagement in May of 2025 or hey, I'd like to be on your podcast, or, like you, I sent a text out and I get.

Brian: 18:49

I probably got 12 people who are. I got probably 12 recommendations of people to put on my podcast. And the best part about it is not just that I feel like, okay, I'm putting it in his hands, but also I'm a lot less stressed right now.

Amanda: 19:06

Exactly. Yeah, I think it's learning to be learning to be patient and the things that you want to grow.

Brian: 19:11

Exactly, Exactly. Okay, this question is my favorite question and it's the one that the audience seems to connect with the most, and so and you don't have to answer it but I'd like to find out what is one of the most difficult things you've ever gone through on your journey in life and over the past you know 10 years of being a black belt in the past, 15 years of being involved with martial arts and any part of your life. But over that journey, what is one of the most difficult things you've gone through in your life and how did you overcome it?

Amanda: 19:46

Let's see, Maybe I've like I've got a couple of different things. One was leaving my old gym and then the other was leaving a really tumultuous relationship.

Amanda: 20:04

That'll do it so yeah, but the leaving my first gym because I was there for 10 years or so, maybe a little bit less, but you know, that in itself is kind of like a relationship and there are still, I find, a ton of phenomenal people within that organization at that gym but it just was not a good, healthy place for me for a long time but kind of that. You know, the loyalty aspect was drilled into me so hard it felt like I couldn't leave for a bit. So I'm just really glad I had a really solid group of people to kind of help me work out of that and realize that there are much better things. And that's kind of how I ended up at 10th Planet with Phil Schwartz and Sam Hardy and all those guys. They're just a phenomenal group of individuals. And then, you know, with those people I was in a pretty not awesome relationship for far too long.

Brian: 21:30

Was that? The same time you were at the gym too?

Amanda: 21:34

A little bit. It was mostly after I had left, kind of exiting it for a bit. But yeah, I was with this person for probably three, almost four years and it was, yeah, super, super difficult, all of the things that I should have listened, I don't know. My mom had told me in the beginning, like this person is not your person, they're not right for you, but at the time it was really easy to listen to someone who was telling you all of these really nice things, yeah. So I got kind of consumed by this person and kind of the classic, oh, he'll get better, I can help fix him or I can.

Brian: 22:37

Yeah, Well, I'm not going to ask what happened that made you go, but was there a moment for you where you just said like an epiphany, I don't know, yeah, I had yeah.

Amanda: 22:51

So he was an addict, he liked to do cocaine and he definitely liked to drink and all that kind of stuff, which I'm not a huge fan of at all, actually. But after a few incidences of some things, I finally asked him. I was like, do you think you'll ever change or do you want to change? And he was like, oh no, I was like I'm not going to change and I was like God, that's all I needed to hear After all these years. I just needed to hear that. But, to be quite honest, if I didn't have the support system or the community of several people from the gym and obviously my family, I don't know where I would kind of be today. I would say that a lot of those people kind of saved my life or definitely helped me get through that phase of my life.

Brian: 23:55

Well, timing is everything you have to change people. That's right. So now looking back, how long ago was that?

Amanda: 24:03

That was two and a half three years ago now.

Brian: 24:08

So, when you look back three years later, what was the value you got out of? What did you learn that now made you a better person, that if you wouldn't have experienced that time with that gentleman, that you would never have gotten out of life.

Amanda: 24:27

I learned all of the red flags. I learned that I need to be happy with myself before I ever pursue another relationship. I learned that I cannot fix someone, that I am not in charge of someone's actions. I am learning still every day to love myself and that my value isn't within a win from a competition, it's not within a loss. It's someone's happiness. I shouldn't be in charge of making someone happy Again. They need to be happy with themselves before we can pursue something or link our happinesses together.

Brian: 25:25

Those are some incredibly strong, life-changing, altering learnings. I like to ask that because a lot of people tune into the podcast today, or a lot of podcasts of this type, because they're going through something. Some people want to continue to grow and their life is going very well, but we all know we're all going to fall flat on our faces at some point. We're going to have some really rough times. We already have some, are still in them. I think it's important for us to realize that we're in those moments and they're not there to beat us up. They do beat us up, but that's not the intent of those moments. The intent of those moments is for us to learn and grow from them. We don't look around for the learnings because we're so busy feeling beaten up, maybe playing victim, maybe feeling sorry for ourselves, that we don't stop and go what the hell am I getting out of this?

Brian: 26:17

Because there's value here. I went through a divorce 19, 20 years ago. I was married one time. I'm married for three years. Two and a half years Same problem. I have never done cocaine in my life. I've only seen it twice in my life. But unfortunately my wife at the time got into it. It wasn't until before we were married, but wasn't when we met. Each other got back into it. People look back and say that must have been a difficult time. It was because I had a little baby to raise.

Brian: 26:46

I got that little baby, full custody of him. Now he's a 21-year-old, incredible young man. I look back now and I think of and I did relatively soon afterward, maybe a couple of years afterward, I started thinking of all the amazing things that I got out of that. I got three amazing step-sons out of it. For one, I got this amazing young boy out of it.

Brian: 27:08

I also learned that whether I ever would have done cocaine in my life or not, I don't know. I don't think I would have. It was never part of my culture. But I know now I would never would do it, because I saw it destroy our family.

Brian: 27:23

I also learned that you have to have empathy for people. One of the things I've heard so many times in my life since this divorce is oh my God, she must have been a horrible person. My God, I'm so sorry you went through that. I can't understand how a woman could just leave their children and leave their family and never see them for 10, 15, 20 years. I'm like, yeah, I don't either understand it, but it isn't my job to understand. All I can do is say she wasn't a bad person. She was a good person but just got caught up in something that she couldn't control.

Brian: 27:56

I learned a lot more empathy for people because I was not a very empathetic person 25 years ago Not at all. I judged people. I was a very judgy person. If you didn't do this, you're an idiot. I was very divisive about things. I've just learned that, hey, people go through shit, man. I don't want to be a part of it, but I'm not going to cut, I'm not going to make that person, I'm not going to belittle that person or berate that person for the choices they made because they were in a different capacity emotionally or mentally than I am. You learn so much when you go through the shit of life.

Amanda: 28:29

For sure. I feel like it's hard to have success when you haven't gone through failure.

Brian: 28:37

It's impossible. I listen to Joe Rogan's podcast. I listen to a lot of podcasts and I drive a lot, so I'll get 15 hours on the road a week sometimes if I'm going to and fro. I throw Rogan on a lot because I love that he talks about it. He does a really good excerpt on just.

Brian: 28:56

He's never met a person who's been successful in life, in whatever capacity, that hasn't had some incredibly dark moments. You don't wish that on anybody. But yet at the same time, I'm glad you're going through this right now because if you handle it properly, you're going to come out of this incredibly strong. I equate it to during the COVID time. I've said this so many times in the podcast. I told when COVID hit and everything was shut down in 20, I guess it was I remember calling my clients and saying, okay, every one of them, you're going to come out of COVID. You will not come out of this unchanged. You will either be a weaker person and your company will be weaker, or you'll be a stronger person and your company will be stronger. It's going to be all you handle yourself.

Brian: 29:39

I told that to my family and obviously I preached that to myself. I saw that. I saw people go through COVID and come out much weaker. I'm not talking physically, I'm talking emotionally and mentally, but I saw people come out of it.

Amanda: 29:52

People just wanted to completely shut down.

Brian: 29:55

They shut everything down. Then I saw people come out of it incredibly strong. We did a thing, amanda, that you probably haven't heard me say, but I have talked about it in the previous show, when COVID hit the night that we were told that schools were shut down, the gym was shut down, our restaurants were shut down. It was just me and my son. He was a junior in high school. I think he was in high school. He had a lot of friends and socialization was shut down.

Brian: 30:20

I brought a whiteboard from my office and put it at the base of our living room. I put the letter C-I-A on it. I said we're going to focus on this right now. I said C stood for control, I stood for influence and A stood for accept. I said what are all the things we have to accept right now? You can't go to the gym, we can't have friends over, we can't go to our restaurants, you're not going to be in school. He didn't care about that one. He kind of liked that one, but not being able to go to the gym.

Brian: 30:46

Then we put a bunch of things down. I crossed them all off. I said we no longer will discuss those. We're not going to spend any time on those because we have to accept those. I said what can we influence? I said all we can influence is other people's behavior. Potentially, we won't even worry about that one. What we're going to focus on is all the things we can control during whatever this two weeks or two years or whatever it's going to be. It works things like we can work out at home, we can read a lot more, we can spend more quality time together, we can cook healthier foods rather than eating out. We put a list of all these things that we can control.

Brian: 31:17

Now, we didn't do all of those, but we did a lot of them. I said if we do these things and not focus at all on the things that we have to just accept and we focus on the things we can control, we're both going to come out of this a lot better person. I said because a lot of the world right now is going to sit there and piss in a moment about the things they have to accept and they're not going to focus on anything that they can control. That is exactly what happened. It happened within my own family. It happened with my friend group, with clients. I saw people do one or the other. It worked out every time. Those who worked on the control factors, they did better. Those who worked on the things that they just have to accept and they worry about those and complain about those, they came out weaker Going back.

Brian: 31:59

I asked you the question and I just want to clarify why I asked that because I think it's so important for the people right now who are going through something or maybe went through something over the last five years that they're still dwelling on. There's a lot of beauty in that dark moment. Find it. You can pull a lot of strength out of your dark side and your dark moments. Oh, absolutely I agree. What Right now? So, as you are advancing further and you're now changing into a new career, it sounds like going into something else Right now. What do you call a win for you in life? What is a victory for Amanda Lowen?

Amanda: 32:33

Okay, a win for me is to maybe have others see me as like a light or a positive presence after I interact with someone, and then definitely to leave people with like confidence and understanding anytime I coach, because I always want my students to be better than me when I started, whenever they started or at that particular time. But yeah, so that's definitely a win for me is to I don't know, I want to leave a really great legacy. Competing is cool. I like competing. It's probably the hardest thing that I have ever done or that I continue to do, but I do it because it keeps me humble and because it makes me so uncomfortable. But when I coach, I feel like I'm really able to let loose a little bit more because I just I love sharing the thing that I love so much with other people.

Brian: 33:43

Well, you think about when you go one on one on a mat or a ring with another human being with no but you know you don't have 11 other members or 10 people on your team that you can your mistakes will not be as exemplified If you're you're going one on one. Everything you do right and everything you do wrong is it's right there for everybody to see. I do think that is the most difficult challenge a person can go, could put themselves in on purpose, is to go one on one combat with another human being. I can't imagine anything more challenging.

Amanda: 34:15

Yeah, it's, it's extraordinarily challenging, but I think that's that's why I continue to do it, because I do want to be challenged. You've got, you know, some, some people in the gym that they just want to be, you know, gym heroes and they, they never want to challenge themselves outside of that pool. And I think those are the people that especially need to do it, because they need to get that slice a humble pie once in a while.

Brian: 34:42

Yeah, I agree, I think I'm one of those people. Actually, I Just look at it like this. I, you know, you said a couple of things there and I think the one thing that really stood out was you know, you want to be this light in this presence for people when you're, when you're, when you're coaching them and teaching them, to leave them with the confidence and understanding. That comes down to one simple thing and I I think this is probably the greatest learning I've ever gotten in my life is that I think our roles of as a human being if we could all take this one role seriously, whatever your profession is, whatever your socioeconomic status is, doesn't matter. Our role is to increase the sense of self-worth of other people and If you can do that because you know, we talk about Shortage of natural resources, whether it be oil or whatever in our country.

Brian: 35:29

Maybe we talk about there's a lack of unity in our country, but what really people mostly lack is a sense of self-worth. That's the biggest um Deficit we have and, as a human being across the entire planet, is people don't really love themselves that much they have. They might be confident in what they do for a living, but they're very insecure as people.

Amanda: 35:50

Yeah, but I think a lot of people just they choose to constantly live in fear. They're scared of everything. They want to be told what to do all of the time and so they take, like zero, I don't know, charge of their own life, because they're just, they're too afraid they're afraid.

Brian: 36:07

Yeah, and it comes down to if you have a sense of self-worth. You can say, hey, I'm not good at this, but I know I can get out there and try, but they're afraid to do that and I think that's part of our job is to increase people's sense of self-worth.

Brian: 36:20

I'm not talking about you know, saying, oh, great job, you're so good. Sometimes it means taking the behind the woodshed and giving them a Of the lashing they need you know the, the figurative lashing to tell them, hey, you're better than this, start acting it. Sometimes it means, yeah, I mean, do a person's face and challenging them and, you know, getting them to come out of their comfort zone, that. But the other thing you said I thought was profound was Getting in that ring and challenging yourself, doing something you're afraid of, because we we tend to love our comfort zones and our comfort zone and you can.

Brian: 36:48

When I meet a person that I'm just mesmerized by, I know that person is constantly stretching his or her comfort zones. Then I meet people who I Sometimes feel kind of comfortable around because they're they feel safe, because they don't ever stretch their comfort zone. I sometimes I like being around them too, because sometimes I need to slow down, I'm not stretch my comfort zones and I like being relaxed around people who are okay, just being who they are. But the people truly inspire other. People are constantly stretching that comfort zone, snapping it into a bigger size and stretching it again, breaking it, making it bigger and bigger and bigger, and I think that's one of the things that one-on-one combat if for lack of a better phrase does for people, it's, it's pretty powerful.

Amanda: 37:30

That's a huge thing, that that Jiu Jitsu teaches people is to be comfortable in the uncomfortable, like how calm, how patient can you be when, when someone is trying to, you know, ultimately Choke you or break the limb or break a foot or whatever it may be?

Brian: 37:50

Yeah, and I think sometimes it's also when you're going through those dark moments of life like you went through a two or three years ago. It's if somebody's in that right now you're uncomfortable. Be comfortable being uncomfortable right now. You can't, you can't, you can't necessarily deny your way out of this. Whatever just difficult you're going through, you have to say I'm in it right now. I have to accept it and get out of it. But you really can't get out of it Unless you accept it and be comfortable in it for a moment and be present in it. Then you can get your move, your way through it.

Brian: 38:19

I remember Dawson always said whenever he fought, whether it was boxing or karate when he was younger he's always afraid when he's in the ring until the first Contact is made, then the fear is just gone. He's absolutely. I don't have feel anything after that, no fear at all. And he did a podcast about a year and a half ago, amanda, with me. It was something titled like that fear. I'm paraphrasing but fear is not. Fear is not here to stop us, it's here to inspire us or something like that, and that's. I think you learn a lot, lot, a lot of that in the combat sports.

Brian: 38:53

Okay, I have an idea. I'm gonna fly out to to Culver, oregon, today and I'm gonna bring my time machine and you're gonna. We're gonna get it. We're gonna fly back to some point in life. I don't care what age you were, but you get a chance to sit down and talk to your former, younger self. I'm just gonna sit there and listen to, maybe take some notes. What would you say to the younger version of yourself? What wisdom, advice or store recipes for success would you share?

Amanda: 39:20

Okay, well, the the first thing I would tell me. I would say hey, go to therapy. Therapy is so cool and you need it. Find a great therapist who will give you some great tools To to go through some some of the tough things. Also, don't settle for what just feels right at the moment. Also, listen to your mom. Even though she was a pain in the ass when you were 15, she knows she knows a lot more than you think. Yeah, I think those are. Those are some huge things, but definitely I Don't know continue pursuing the things that you were most passionate about. I am really, really thankful that I I don't know I I stopped going to school, I had stopped my job and I just I just wanted to do jiu-jitsu and I had complete faith in myself that I would find a way to make it work. And I've mostly found a way to make it work.

Brian: 40:35

Today, about a little over 14 years later, Did I hear you write earlier, amanda, when you fell in love with jiu-jitsu, you kind of just you went full bore into it.

Amanda: 40:46

Yeah, I was. Yeah, I was going to school at the time. I wanted to do like zoology or wildlife rehabilitation. I wanted to work with animals. But I just it's not that I don't love animals today, but I don't know. I just I really wanted to pursue this jujitsu thing. I just I love being able to coach students and help them problem solve and hopefully, hopefully kind of find that passion inside of them.

Brian: 41:22

So Well, I think what I like, what you said earlier is you want to leave a legacy, and I don't think there's anything more profound for another human being to do than leave a positive, inspiring legacy with others. And you can do that, working with children or adults or whatever you do. I mean, everybody has that opportunity. And somebody who's listening might say, well, I washed dishes at a restaurant. Yeah, you can leave a legacy. You can leave a legacy in every capacity of your life. It's based on how you live your own and how you, you know and how you live. That's the biggest way to do it is live a really good life role, be a great role model for others, and no matter what our career choice or where our vocational landing is whatever that might be damn, you can leave it. You can leave a fucking, really good legacy at anything you do. It may not be in the career you chose it could be but it might just be how you treat others on the outside, how you live your life, how you think, how you grow, how you stretch your comfort zones, how you find comfort in the discomfort. You know anything. People are watching at all times.

Brian: 42:19

So, 100%, I want to repeat what Amanda said If she could go back to her younger self. She said, hey, go to therapy. So I'm going to share that with a lot of people, because there's a lot of people out there who will not go to therapy or maybe who are curious, but they've never gone. I've gone to therapy. I probably have had seven or eight different therapists in my life from college on and I've only met a couple that didn't do me any good, but they didn't last long for me. But some of the other ones changed the direction of my life and now you can get on and better help online and do everything remote. You don't even have to go to an office anymore if you don't want to.

Brian: 42:53

So I couldn't agree with that one more. But don't settle for what is comfortable at the moment. I mean you might have to stop and say I have to be comfortable in this discomfort, but I have to say I can do better, I can be better, I deserve better, and work your way through that process, yes, and then pursue your passions. But I want to do the last one, the one you said, the third one you said because I think the best one listen to your mom. I mean listen to your mom. I mean, they always say when I went to college at 18, my mom didn't know anything. When I graduated, five years later, I came home and realized how much my mom learned in those five years. You know.

Amanda: 43:31

It's crazy they know better. No for sure, and I understand not everybody's mom may have a you know that impact on them. You know, maybe my dad was a real interesting character. He taught me some significant lessons, but in a very different way than my mom did. Yeah, my mom has just always kind of been there. I think she's a big fan, but she also keeps me real honest.

Brian: 44:07

Well, it's kind of hard to hide from your mom. She kind of knows a lot of things about you. They all do.

Amanda: 44:14

Yeah.

Brian: 44:14

Oh yeah, and you're right, it doesn't have to be your mom.

Brian: 44:16

Maybe for some people they have a better relation with their dad or an aunt or an uncle or a grand or a friend, but there are people out there who know you, who love you, who trust you, who want to better you. Listen to them, and for my children I'll say this because I know they're listening Listen to your dad, too, and mom, I know you're listening. Trust me, I do listen to you. Whether you think I do or not, I do listen to you. There's nobody in the world whose advice I respect more than my mother's. Well, what's next for you, then, as you're continuing on this journey? What's next, what's the next big step or phase for Amanda?

Amanda: 44:50

Oh, next big step I am in the process of becoming a sheriff's deputy for Jefferson County Correctional Facility. Eventually I'll be opening up 10th Planet Bend, so if you guys are in the Central Oregon Bend area, keep on the lookout for that. And then eventually I will also be a rodeo champion what I don't know when that will be. My horse and I are pretty green. We're pretty new still, but that's my current favorite thing in the world is being really, really bad at something. I get to be a white belt all over and there's zero expectations and people in that world don't know who I am at all. So I get to start all over in that regard and one day I'll get a really cool belt buckle or something.

Brian: 45:50

You can put it on your other shoulder, that's right. That's right, ok, so that one. I knew about the deputy sheriff one because you told me that when we spoke last week.

Brian: 46:00

I did not know about this passion, about rodeo champion. I just think there's so much that we could dive into. We're going to do another podcast in maybe a year or so when you're more involved in that one. But just think about this everyone, first female black belt in the state of Oregon, continuing to grow in that field, starting a whole new vocation as a sheriff's deputy, but then also the next thing is rodeo champion. I mean, I think when you cross one threshold in life and you prove to yourself that you could do this and this is like the case for you getting your black belt in 10 years ago it gives you that hope and that faith and that confidence that you can do the next thing. And I think that's why, if you feel like you haven't had a win in life out there anyone go out there and get a little win.

Brian: 46:47

Find a way to get a win in life. It can be something small, it can be I'm going to walk three days this week. That's all it can be. Now I'm going to go for a walk three days. If you haven't walked at all in the last two years, walk three days. Then next week do four days. Find a way to get little wins, because little wins and successes they build on the bigger wins and those build on even bigger wins. It's not about jumping from zero to 100.

Brian: 47:09

It's going from zero to one, then one to 1.5, then 1.5 to two. That's how we grow. And then when you get those big, exponential wins like when Amanda got her belt, earned her first black belt 10 years ago, that was a big win, but that came after five years of little wins and now she's going to the next win and she's going to go to the next win, and they build on each other. They snowball. I didn't know anything about the radio and so rodeo. Now we've got to have everybody who writes in heart letters. This week please recommend to me that we get Amanda on social media, though. She has a very strong social media presence, so we got to tell her to get on Facebook more. We got to watch this journey evolve for her over the next few years, so hopefully people are going to write in and ask me, to ask you, to get on Facebook more.

Amanda: 47:54

All right, people want to see your story.

Brian: 47:56

Amanda, I want to watch it. All right, I'll work on it. I'll work on it, ok, all right. The last question I'll ask you is the question that is is there a question that I didn't ask you, that you wish I had, or is there anything? A final message you want to leave with the bamboo pack audience?

Amanda: 48:14

Oh, I'm just again. I'm honored and very thankful to have been invited on your podcast and again, I think, some things that we already touched on or covered. But just if you're interested in something, pursue it, like, just get out of that fear and get out of your box and just do it. Set those attainable goals, but then also set that goal that's a little bit scary to you and work on it.

Brian: 48:49

Attainable goals. I think that's powerful. I think what I hear. There is something that I'm doing a lot of coaching now, amanda on 10x growth, and that is kind of. I'm a big believer. That's why the name of my firm, the name of the podcast, is the bamboo lab, because I believe in the process of how they plant Chinese bamboo trees.

Brian: 49:08

And they plant them and I know the audience is here, we say this a dozen times and you plant the seed, you water, you nourish it, it gets the right sunlight, you come back, you keep doing that over and over and over the course of three or four years. Nothing happens. You don't see anything growing. And then right around between the fourth and fifth year, this tree explodes through the earth and it grows 90 feet in the first six weeks and what's happening is during that three to four years, it's growing. It's growing underground, it's growing this immaculate, incredibly strong root system. So when it does grow, when hurricanes and typhoons come, where all the other trees break and fall down, this tree bends and it comes right back.

Brian: 49:46

So that's what I tell people is you have to have these small, attainable goals that you just keep going after over and over, like they do plant. When you plant and water and nourish the bamboo seed because it's growing, you're just not seeing it Then you get this explosive 10x growth and that's where you or at the same time, you have to have this vision of I'm going to grow with 690 feet in the first six weeks once I do go through the earth. That's your 10x growth and that's the thing you have to go for, that thing that scares you. But in the meantime, just keep planting that seed, water that seed, nourish that seed, give it the sunlight, because it's all working. You just don't notice it yet, but it's working underground, man.

Amanda: 50:25

Yeah, learn to love those challenges and get out of that victim mindset. Not everyone is out to get you. Stop being so afraid of everything. Yeah, just live.

Brian: 50:41

OK, I have nothing else to say, because that's the best way to end it just live. Oh man, fred, I'm so glad you came on here, amanda. I knew this was going to be a great time talking to you, and I know there's so much more in there that we're going to get you back. Usually I can tell when I'm talking to somebody OK, this is the one that we're going to want to bring back Six to 12 months or so, so hopefully you're open to another interview sometime, maybe later in the year. We can want to hear what we're going to have.

Amanda: 51:06

Yes, absolutely.

Brian: 51:07

And I really want to go. I'd like to explore at one time your journey to becoming a Black Belt, like what you went through, what you did. So we can talk about that at another time, but I think for now I just want to take the time to officially thank you for being this amazing person that you are and is such an inspiring guest on the Bamboo Lab podcast.

Amanda: 51:25

Thank you so much.

Brian: 51:26

You're welcome. Hey everybody, please send in those heartletters. Let us know what this particular episode of Amanda Lowen did for you, how it inspired you, how it made you think on a different level, maybe challenged you to get out there and stretch that comfort zone, try new things, call your ask, listen to your mom, if nothing else, and just know that I appreciate you all. Please smash that like button, please rate, review us and please share this particular episode with three people you love who could get a little learning and inspiration and maybe be challenged just enough to take that next step in life. I'll talk to you all in a few days. In the meantime, please get out there and strive to give and be your best as a human being, show love and respect to others and to yourself, and please, by all means, live intentionally today. Goodbye.