00:02.49
jeffekennedy
Um, good morning. Everyone this is Jeffe Kennedy romantasy author of epic fantasy romance I'm here with my first cup of coffee.
00:13.35
jeffekennedy
Ah, today is say it with me people. It is Friday wo whoo whoo make third ah tomorrow is star wars day may the fourth be with you. But today is is the third but it's a Friday and um, yeah. It's just been a week for me. I mean it's literally been a week since last we spoke well at least a work week. But um, also it's been a week. Ah I probably say this a lot but recovering from con. I just have to accept the fact that it's gonna take me a while to recover from con um reentry is never easy. Is it. There's a burn to burn to reentry. Ah, and I'm facing the fact that I got like nothing done in april.
01:06.50
jeffekennedy
I got something like 11000 words and I will caveat that um with that I know for some people that sounds really good for me. It's really low. Um I did better in March although not substantially so. I think I'm still kind of reeling from step dad Dave's death and then lots of traveling and visitors in April and those kinds of things. So I've been working on reluctant wizard I finally. I didn't do any work on it for two days Monday and Tuesday were crazy. There were all kinds of things going on I'll tell you a little bit about that. But um, ah ah yeah, ah I was kind of in crisis mode for the first 2 days of the week and we ended up deciding. Ah, sharp listeners among you might recall that I was planning to go to Tucson this week I was going to be going there yesterday. David and I were going to drive out there and we changed our minds and we're going next weekend which gives us a little bit of breathing room here's Killian Killian who is the source. Of some of my difficulties all the way honey now. Sorry big tail in front of the camera there. Um, so on Monday morning um post podcast all of a sudden oops that was kill in hitting the wind chimes.
02:41.58
jeffekennedy
You know, look at that face though. You're such a sweet cat. He has a sweet cat but he also suddenly attacked our other cat Jackson um, like attacked attacked like pinned him down by the throat and I had to pull him off and it. Happened um again a little bit later and I thought maybe I brought them together too soon 1 Jackson was just coming in from around the side of the house and this had happened a couple of weeks ago which I had put down to Jackson having a weird smell on him. Which can happen right? You know cats can um displace that aggression and and sure enough like an hour later they were curled up sleeping together. Everything was fine. So I thought well that's what happened this time but no, ah he um.
03:37.47
jeffekennedy
I tried to let them be back near each other again a little bit later and Killian attacked again. Um, he didn't hurt him jackson's fine. But I mean at least he didn't cause injuries but it clearly hurt and then cleaning ladies came. Um, oh no wait sorry I'm jumping ahead of myself so I kept them apart I separated them and tried again that evening I thought well maybe I had not given enough time tried to get him that evening and Killian went after him again. Fortunately, we were able to keep him off this time. But um, yeah, that was it was really disruptive. It was shocking and upsetting because they had been such great friends and we didn't know what to do so Tuesday morning I called the vet. Because it was clear that Killian was still feeling really aggressive. So it wasn't just a something I called the veterinarian and um.
04:43.45
jeffekennedy
I called a couple of our local vets and no one could get him in for like a week and I felt as ironic because there was this one vet that we've been going to for a long time and it felt like they could never get us in in an emergency right in any kind of thing like that and they had even. Haul me like a few months ago because the main vet had retired finally and they kind of cold called me and I can't remember why I picked up the phone because typically I wouldn't but they had my number it showed who they were and I thought maybe we were traveling and I thought you know like our cats have been taken into the bed or. Right? I didn't know so I answered and they were doing like this survey and talking about how there've been all this gossip about the vet clinic and you know did I have problems and you know that they wanted to be responsive and that they have more vets now and you know more available appointment times. All this kind of thing and I was like well I mean. You know like I never leave my house so I don't hear Gossip. Ah but I was like you know it was just mainly that we can't ever get in and they're like oh it's better now. So I called them. They couldn't get him in for like three weeks and I was trying to decide which cat to take in first right? because ah because I of course I was doing my internet research and talking with some of my cat friends and 1 of the things that they say is that if an animal sick like if Jackson's sick that that might cause Killian to attack him. Um, so was like I you.
06:18.86
jeffekennedy
Supposed to leave for Tucson. So that's part of why we decided not to mom and so then I they I ended up going to Smith Veterinary Clinic here in Santa Fe and I am named calling them because they were awesome. They were amazing. They're entirely walk in. It's no appointments. But if you go early in the morning you don't even have to wait and I took Killian in there and one of the things I thought I'd better. Ask was is he neutered because I knew that he has his little ballsack but this is like something that's changed I know that a lot of vets. Um. Leave the the sec in place and just take the testicles out health reasons I don't know much about it. But I just knew that so I knew he had a little ballsacck I thought it was empty and reader it was not empty. So it turns out he is not neuter. He is a full. Tomcat. Ah I melty emoji. Um, and I feel I feel terrible that I did not know this I bought him from a breeder. He's a full breadd main coon cat and if you have ever bought. A fullbred anything. You know that the breeders don't sell you an uncut animal at pet prices right? You have to pay a lot for a stud or for a mama I don't know what the word would be for Mama. It's you you don't get.
07:54.30
jeffekennedy
And unfixed animal and I have you know I love Maine coon cats I've bought them from breeders. This is now killan's our sixth something like that and I can't believe that I didn't know he wasn't intact. But fortunately um. Some of my cat friends are are equally shocked. They were like and and even called the breeder irresponsible which makes me feel slightly better and less of an idiot. So yeah, Killan's eighteen months old now and full Tom but. Not for long. He's getting snipped on Monday and please think good thoughts I'm very very hopeful that this will stop his aggressiveness. Um my my friend marcea hi Marcelo who's one of my cat expert friends ah said that. I do up to a loud. She said it might take up to six weeks for the testosterone testosterone poisoning to leave his system. So hopefully it won't take that long. We are keeping them separated and that's working fine. Um, but not ideal. It. I told David this too and he's like and he's like he says I I find it really funny that she refers to to testosterone as poisonous and I was like yeah she also referred to it as poor jackson a victim of masculine toxicity in his own household and I'm not sure if David was amused by that. But.
09:27.79
jeffekennedy
All of us dealing with masculine toxicity were amused this one's like literally going for the throat. Sorry toxic masculinity is what I mean anyway. So that's been. That's been a thing this week and. I was talking with one of my friends and just feeling very off kilter and emotional and they said are you writing because my friends know me and I was like um, no I haven't written in like eleven days and they're like you need to start writing this is what you do this is who you are. And so Wednesday I started writing again and it did feel so much better and I'm going to share this quote I've shared it many many times but it's a quote from Mark Rutherford and I find it very meaningful. He says there is in each of us an up willing spring of life energy. Love whatever you like to call it. If a course is not cut for it. It turns the ground around it into a swamp and so I've shared that many times because I always think about that when I'm not writing yeah I get swampy. So while the past couple of days haven't been wildly productive. They are there. Um, and of course this book has just been disrupted and I need to um I need to get my head into this story and I feel like I've been saying this for weeks now I just don't know where it's going and maybe I just need to be more zen with.
11:00.78
jeffekennedy
Not knowing where it's going. Ah so um, yeah, it's just kind of like been a topsytury week but we're going to go to Tucsson next weekend I'm having a meeting with my editor on the thirteenth to talk about book 2 ah, the sequel to never the roses and so I'm thinking about that story too. I don't know it's an interesting place to be um, with reluctant wizard I have this beautiful cover I want to do the cover reveal but I want to have the pre-order ready. And I don't want to commit to that pre-order yet until I know what my schedule is going to be and I'm also having a heck of a hard time writing this book which I feel like I've been saying on the last nineteen million books that weren't oh near us slash neverthelesss. I want to be writing different things and I'm tempted to stop and do that but I know that you are all not all of you but many many of you are waiting for reluctant wizard and I'm really torn on this. So I don't often. Not write the book I'm supposed to be writing with never the roses being the great exception because it demanded to be written dark wizard I kind of did the same thing with um I was supposed to write part of it and then switch often I just had to finish writing the whole thing. Ah.
12:33.65
jeffekennedy
And both of those books like have paid off right? So now I'm starting to wonder should I only write the book I feel like writing which would this goes against my entire credo Any of you have been listening for a long time know that this is like not how I do things. Um.
12:53.31
jeffekennedy
I don't know I think I'm going to keep poking at this book keep pushing it forward until I get my line edits on never the roses and then I don't know if I mentioned here but I have to have never the roses 2. We could call it that. And we should call it Oneira 2. I don't know book 2 ah done by like November so I have lots of time to write it.
13:25.50
jeffekennedy
And I need a self-publishlish release. So I really should get this one out. Um, although if agent Sarah decides she doesn't want to go on submission with first order of the fa realms I could release that so I don't know I don.
13:41.77
jeffekennedy
Ah, my indecisiveness is not helping um but also not writing was definitely not helping so so we'll see I'll probably just keep trying to ramp up keep trying to push this book. Ah.
14:00.70
jeffekennedy
I'm I'm not at the act 1 climax yet. So I I don't feel like all of my stakes are set I feel like I've lost the thread of the overall arc and I'm not sure what the best way to get that back is except maybe get these other things off my plate and then a marsonette.
14:21.60
jeffekennedy
Yeah, yeah, I don't want to make you all wait for this book and I like what I've written so far like yesterday I kind of went back or maybe it was Wednesday it was probably Wednesday when I thought okay so I went back a couple of chapters which I don't typically do but I needed to get my head in the book again. So I went back a couple of chapters and um. And it's good I'm I'm happy with it. It's good. So I don't know what my problem is um I have not talked about the tortured poets department as you all know I am a swifty going way way back. So of course I have been listening to the. Tortured poets department almost since I did not step late I didn't listen to it Friday morning I'd work to do but I did listen to it over the weekend I've been listening to it a lot. Um.
15:13.75
jeffekennedy
Favorite songs are the black dog I love the black dog and I'm going to go on record here with my Swifty opinion that I believe the black dog is totally about Joe Alwyn. yes, there are Mattie Healey references in it. But there's too much emotion in that song. For that. Not to be about Joe all one. That's absolutely about him and I love that old habits die screaming. Oh her raising other songs I love are down bad definitely love Down Bad. Carien, I love the albatross too. Um, I particularly like the lyrics from this song these really resonate with me. Um I'd rather burn my whole life down than listen to 1 more second of all this bitching and moaning I'll tell you something about my good name. It's mine alone to disgrace. I don't cater to all these vipers dressed in empathe clothing such great lines that one's obviously in reference to Mattie Healey and everyone disapproving of her little rebound fling with him. Ah, but yeah I mean I am obviously not Taylor Swift I would like to have Taylor Swift's influence and money but I would also I I was about to say I would like to have her talent but I think I have talent. Um yeah I won't qualify any further I'm just going to own that. Um.
16:47.20
jeffekennedy
But yeah, um, that feeling of that you owe things to people that you have to maintain a certain kind of reputation um a certain kind of you know that you that you have to be pure. You know, especially for women right? that you ah yeah, I'm not being articulate about it. Um, but I love how she says I'll tell you something about my good name. It's mine alone to disgrace and yeah, yeah. Right? with you there Taylor so um, but yes, it's of course a brilliant album I'm annoyed that we can't get the anthology on the double cd set I do have um my Cd here because I like to have the Cd backups but I am starting to listen. More and more on the phone via my car stereo or light walking the dog. So yeah, it's good to good to enjoy that the brilliance of her lyrics and it is the breakup album that I wanted I grade that so long London. Is a great song. Um, and let's see what else there are so many good songs on that I really do love who's afraid a little me which is another one that resonates so now.
18:20.93
jeffekennedy
Anyway I feel like I need to get my head together I've probably been saying this for a long time I was just messaging with Kelly Robson this morning and she said she was struggling for story focus. So maybe this is just like the thing we always do we struggle for story focus. Alas, it's still an amazing job right? I was recently reminded of. You know how great it is the flexibility of my job and that I can do things like that right for a few days and deal with cats and vets and so forth. Oh I probably didn't answer your question. Are you all out there shouting to me I did take Jackson in as well. Um, after we discovered that Killian is intact and that's probably the problem. But the vet thought yeah we should check Jackson too. So this like I went home brought swapped out cats went back and they did a full senior screen on Jackson because he's 12 and the vet said that she was pleasantly surprised by his numbers. He is a very very healthy cat. So I feel like at least a good cat mom that way right? Ah, so hopefully this will get resolved on that note. Um I wish for you all focus if I can't have it I hope you have it and I will talk to you all on Monday you all take care. By bye.