The Families of Character Show
We serve parents who want more for their family. Our show offers research-based parenting solutions to the most common family problems, real-life parenting stories, and authentic support. The host, Jordan Langdon, is a wife, mother, and Licensed Clinical Social Worker who validates what parents go through and offers practical actionable steps parents can implement today to transform their families in joy and unity. Guests are experts in their field of work and provide high-value material for parents and families.
The Families of Character Show
Ep. #168: Your Family Needs an Emergency Plan with Garrett Golesh
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What would you do if you noticed something wasn't quite right in your neighborhood? When off-duty firefighter Garrett Golish spotted smoke drifting through his yard while chatting with his sister-in-law about campfires, he could have dismissed it as someone grilling or burning yard waste. Instead, he trusted his instincts and took immediate action – a decision that likely saved a family with a sleeping baby who had no idea their backyard swim spa was fully engulfed in flames.
In this episode, Garrett shares:
• Why recognizing danger signs quickly can make the difference between safety and tragedy
• Why smoke inhalation is more deadly than burns in most fire situations
• Family emergency preparedness essentials
• Practical safety tips
• The importance of escape ladders for second-story rooms and practicing their use
• The value of After Action Reviews (AARs) to evaluate what went well and what could improve
• Using family dinner conversations to help children develop awareness and response skills
Visit our website for more resources on building character and preparedness in your family.
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Hey parents, welcome back to our show. Listen, what would you do if you noticed something wasn't quite right while you're just in your backyard minding your own business doing yard work? Well, today in studio, our guest firefighter, garrett Golish, trusted his gut and jumped into action when he saw smoke drifting through his neighborhood, while off-duty from his own home. His story reminds us that everyday heroes are the ones who pay attention and take action. So this episode is all about seeing a need and filling it, not only in emergencies, but in everyday family life. Garrett also is going to introduce us to a powerful tool used by first responders the After Action Review, or AAR, and you're going to find out how your family can use it to build stronger teamwork, communication and readiness. So at the time this interview airs in September, it's National Preparedness Month, so there's really no better time to help your family get equipped for whatever comes your way. So welcome to the Families of Character.
Speaker 2:Show Garrett, Thank you very much. Thanks for having me. It's an honor.
Speaker 1:Yes, absolutely, garrett. Take us back to that day in your backyard. This was just a few months ago. But if you can kind of put yourself in that situation, tell us a little bit about what you saw and what made you stop and think like something's not right here for sure.
Speaker 2:So I was in my yard actually talking to one of my sister-in-laws because I had called her to wish her a happy mother's day and that's just the day that we were able to chat um and we were talking about campfires, because her sons like campfires, and we were talking about how to put them together and keep them safe and everything. And I'm out in the kind of the side yard and I see a little bit of a haze. It was super light at first and the first thought I had was oh great, spring and summer in Colorado, lots of wildfires. We always get that haze that you can't see the mountains you can't really see you know, too far away and very quickly I'm like that's a bit too thick, too fast for sure, and it doesn't usually come that often. You know that early.
Speaker 2:And the second thing that happened was that I smelt it, and you don't usually smell the haze very much, at least to that extreme Right, and so I just sort of walked to where it was coming from, because the wind was blowing towards me towards my house and at that point I could see around my house like very dark smoke and at that point I thought I don't think that that's a smoker or a grill.
Speaker 2:Um, it's just too much. And so I wanted to go sort of investigate, uh first. That's why I told my sister-in-law I said, hey, there's actually a fire in my neighborhood. So this has been great. But I've got to let you go so I can go figure this out.
Speaker 1:Wow, okay. So you're talking to your sister-in-law about a campfire. All of a sudden you see haze. Then you smell it and you're going, and I know where you live. You live in an area where people may or may not, you know close by be burning trash or something grilling out, like you said. But you're going, this is different and you assess that this, the smoke is coming quicker and you can smell it, and so you just hung up the phone and started heading the way of the smoke.
Speaker 2:Yeah. So I basically ran down my driveway and as I got, or yeah, down my driveway, down the cul-de-sac and as I saw kind of from that angle, it's like a dark kind of building smoke. That is just like no, there's something on fire. For sure, it's definitely not a smoker, it's definitely not just a couple branches that somebody cut and they're lighting in their little fire pit or something. So at that point, that's when I still had the phone in my hand, but that's when I called 911 and said, hey, I don't know what the house is yet, but there's definitely. In my opinion, the house is on fire at this point, based on the amount of smoke. And then I just ran through a couple of neighbors' yards, just kind of heading towards that spot and honestly trying to avoid being right in the middle of the smoke because it was blowing towards me. So I kind of did like a little bit of a banana swing to get to that yard and then that's kind of what I saw.
Speaker 1:Wow, OK. So what was what happened next? Like, walk us through what you did. You see this fire. It's coming from the back of the house.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so it was the back of the house. So I ran through the front yard of a house that faces me, through their backyard, and it was basically like the caddy corner or the opposite end, so kind of the backyards met a little bit at the corner.
Speaker 2:So I saw that it was a little bit more concentrated to a spot and I could kind of see the back porch door and so I kind of ran around the north side of it and I realized it looked like some sort of hot tub or something like that that was fully engulfed at that point and there was somebody there, an older gentleman, that was like kind of grabbing the hose and kind of looked like they weren't sure if it was on or trying to use it, and I thought that was the homeowner, and so I quickly just went up to him and said like, hey, let me you know, cause I could feel the heat and I'm pretty far away from it.
Speaker 2:And so as I go up to him it's like, oh, it's way too hot to be where he is right now, and so when I kind of grabbed him, I pulled him to the side and you could see that he had, like since, like the hairs on his face and some on his chest and his eyebrows and everything, so he had been a bit too close, obviously, and he was just a little bit out of it, and so I was thinking smoke inhalation, like she's just going to be a little altered, and so I'm like, hey, are you the old homeowner?
Speaker 2:They're wondering what this address is, and I don't know, because I ran through some yards you know, I know they can ping my cell phone, but he was just kind of like I don't know.
Speaker 2:I'm like is there anyone inside? And he's like I don't know. You know, it seemed like he just was a little off. So I thought, okay, he had some smoke inhalation, we need to get him out of this environment. And so I had him go with me around, basically to the front. And that was after I grabbed the hose and put just a little bit of water on it because I just thought maybe I could help a little. But at that point, you know, your hose is too small for that big of a fire really.
Speaker 2:And so I tried to just spray a couple of things around it to keep it wet, but mainly to get him out of the environment. So I got him out, we went to the front and then the homeowner answered the door and, um, she was like, is this my house?
Speaker 2:like, is there something wrong in my yard? Um, and so, uh, I guess she was downstairs working out. She had kind of checked on the guy working on their hot tub. That was the worker, actually, that's what I found out. And then she thought, all right, my one-year-old sleeping in the basement with me. Uh, you know, in the room next to me I'm gonna run on the treadmill for about 20 minutes. Um, and then we have a couple of dogs, and so she didn't really see anything, cause she was down in the basement.
Speaker 2:And so she um, I just kind of like went in and told her I was a firefighter cause I was hoping she would trust me in that way and, um, and tell her I was a neighbor as well and just say, hey, is there anybody else? Let's just get them out the front, it's okay, like it hasn't entered the house yet, it's something outside. So she grabbed her kiddo, we just sort of shoved the dogs out, you know, and just sort of went down to the street which is pretty far offset from her house. So she basically just went to a different neighbor's yard and then at that point it was pretty straightforward. I mean, I went and just kind of did what I would do if I was on duty at that point.
Speaker 2:You know it was like okay, I'm going to go open these gates, I'm going to tell dispatch that they can pull the line on the south side, because the north side has a tall retaining wall. It'd be hard to get over.
Speaker 1:Okay, and then I just kind of helped out.
Speaker 2:You know they showed up and I just kind of helped them flick out the hose.
Speaker 1:You know, it was pretty straightforward at that point.
Speaker 2:I went and took a couple more looks to make sure I could give dispatch, like hey, it is starting to hit the house or not, right? I mean, it kind of lit the fence there was like this little garden area and it melted the gutter and it blew out a couple windows. So you heard a couple like explosion sounds. It blew out like three or four windows, but other than that, the actual house with the stucco kind of bubbling, it didn't actually like catch the house, which was awesome.
Speaker 1:So inside the house there is a woman, her one-year-old child, two dogs, and she has no clue about what's happening, right in her backyard, similar to me.
Speaker 2:She said oh, sometimes we get a haze in Colorado. I just thought that's all it was. I could see through, like the little window in our basement, and I just thought, okay, whatever.
Speaker 1:Wow. So with your experience as a firefighter and just observing how quickly it was kind of spreading around and the type of fire it was let's say you hadn't shown up and this guy wasn't able to do anything to help how quickly would that have spread to her home, do you think? Yeah, in a matter of minutes.
Speaker 2:So what I found out later was that it was actually a swim spa, so quite a bit bigger than a hot tub, because it's kind of full length and you can swim against kind of that current that blows towards you than a hot tub, because it's kind of full length and you can swim against kind of that current that blows towards you.
Speaker 2:Well, it started to actually catch a couple of their cottonwoods on fire and so it just sort of escalates, right. So if it had gone to the east of where it was, it's sort of open field, native grass and trees, so that can be like a wildfire, which it's spring colorado, right. So it's windy, so it's a wind-driven fire. It really pushes it hard. And then on the other end you saw that the gutter was melting, the stucco was bubbling and the windows were breaking.
Speaker 2:So you give it, you know, maybe a handful of minutes, a slight shift in wind direction, which the wind does, and maybe part of the house starts to catch, because the fence leading up to the house was on fire at this point, and so a couple of minutes maybe, and then maybe the house would have started to catch, and you know, and really what's going to get you first is the smoke. That's like for sure the thing that will kill you first, because generally that's what you either see, first you inhale it. It's really dangerous, um, and so that's actually what kills the most people is smoke inhalation.
Speaker 1:I had no idea. Yeah, so you don't?
Speaker 2:you don't usually die in a fire because you got burned. It's usually because you inhaled a bunch of smoke. And if you hate inhaled too much and you're trapped in your house, sure, then you might pass out and eventually you may get burned, right. But you'll actually die more often at least, or get sick of smoke inhalation. So it's more like with those windows shattering, well, now smoke can enter the house and you definitely want to avoid that. So I don't know, it's hard to say a handful of minutes maybe, wow.
Speaker 1:Just think you're in your backyard minding your own business. You see this smoke and something just prompts you internally to go go now. Go check this out. Yes, we know you're a firefighter. So, you have some experience in this right, you can recognize it easier than the rest of us, but I mean, what do you think it's your day off? Like you didn't have to do that.
Speaker 2:Oh man, it's kind of funny because people actually talk about that at work, because there's a balance of mental health that a lot of people either need and for all of us, right, you know, it's kind of like any other profession. If somebody were to call you every day on your off day and ask you questions about it, I mean that's just draining, it's a lot Sure and so, but for me I don't know, I'm still just young and love my job still, or whatever.
Speaker 2:But I still will stop at accidents, I still stop when I see some sort of problem, that I think that me as a human, or me with some experience or knowledge medical knowledge, as a paramedic as well that maybe I can help in a situation and I think I truly love being a firefighter and paramedic that any opportunity just is it's like an automatic, it's like the Holy spirit like literally pulls my body towards the scene. There's no stopping it, there's no delaying or like, oh, should I go over there and help? You know, I just go and yeah, I just. I think it's totally still something that I willing to go help, I guess.
Speaker 1:It's innate in you, it sounds like, and as a man, as you know, god created us very different men and women and we believe that, and inside of a man is this desire and this need to rescue and protect and provide.
Speaker 2:Yeah, we run towards the danger to try to see if we can help and women are more nurturing and they can keep kids away from the fire.
Speaker 1:Right, right, which was beautiful that you were able to do both.
Speaker 1:You were able to rescue the mom and the kid and the dogs and then go fight the fire and let them, you know, be in a safe place while you were helping out. Wow, I just wonder too, growing up, some people may be going like why are we talking about, you know, rescuing this? This woman and her one-year-old and dogs from this neighborhood fire right On the families of character show. But it really sparked something in me pun intended, I guess sparked something, but I was just thinking like the average ordinary neighbor may have just thought you know, that's probably Joe cooking something on the grill, or I'm sure somebody's burning trash somewhere, and I'm also sure that someone's probably already called 911.
Speaker 2:And we did ask one neighbor and that's what they thought, because my father-in-law showed up at some point and he went and asked a neighbor and he said, hey, what did you think that all was? And he's like I thought it was a big smoker that somebody was using. I thought they were just burning some branches you know, and it's just all that like, um, like, just exactly what you said, yeah that's exactly what it was actually making assumptions.
Speaker 1:I think we can do that, and part of it is just like well, I don't want to get in their business or I don't want to make a big scene, if it's okay. But I think it's more important to err on the side of caution.
Speaker 2:And if there's something happening in your neighborhood go check the facts right.
Speaker 1:So often we are making stuff up. I call it MSU-ing, right? We just take a situation and we just make stuff up about it, and then we excuse ourselves from the responsibility of having to do anything about it and the next thing you know? I mean I can't imagine how you would feel if you just kept talking to your sister on the phone.
Speaker 2:Oh, man, I couldn't imagine.
Speaker 1:And then realize it was a house fire or something similar. There's a mother and a baby in the basement and you could have done something.
Speaker 1:That'd be horrible, there's no way. Right, right, terrible. And so I think this is so important for us to just really expose this story to parents and kids, because we want to train our kids to be able to see a need, to identify something's not right here in my neighborhood or at my school, and then give them the courage and confidence to speak up or to move their body in action, to spring forward and help people right.
Speaker 2:We were called to love our neighbor.
Speaker 1:And that doesn't mean just being like, oh, you're so kind, here are some flowers. It's like really loving them and serving them in times of need and checking things out and being of service to them. So did your parents like growing up if there were parents listening and they're going like, how do I get my kid to care? Right, how do I get my kid to even notice, like, look up from their video game or their you know cell phone or whatever? How are you raised? What did you witness with your parents?
Speaker 2:So I'm the seventh of eight kids and there were a couple of miscarriages between me and my older sibling, the next older sibling, so they were a little bit older, and so I just had great examples of people doing awesome things, I mean even now, you know, becoming parents. I have great examples of parents because all of those siblings are parents, you know, and so I think, each of them in their own way, including my parents, um, you know, they always go out of their way to help people and they do it in different ways.
Speaker 2:I mean, one sister, you know, went out of the country to volunteer and other sisters will do things locally, and it's just, I feel like, leading by example, they didn't make it an announcement. It wasn't like, hey, I'm going to go help with the food bank or I'm going to go donate this or that. It's like they would just do it. We'd kind of find out, or I'd see them go do it silently, right, silent servant, and it was just kind of the way, obviously, that our parents raised us. I mean they were examples first and then we followed them and I think the little things matter too. You know, just fixing something small that you see that's broken. I mean, there's a good quote. I feel like I heard it when I was really young, but it said you should never walk past something you could have fixed.
Speaker 1:Because if you have the ability to fix it.
Speaker 2:Why wouldn't you just quickly fix it, Even if it's simple stuff like the loose handle in the kitchen cabinet or whatever right, it's like just go grab a screwdriver and fix it real quick.
Speaker 2:And that obviously grows to how can I make a bigger impact than the kitchen handle? And it's like, hey, there's something I could do. Someone's pulled over. It looks like they're fixing a tire. Maybe I could at least offer it like, hey, you got this, or can I help you? Yeah, and it just sort of that consistency too, is like, oh, this is what we should normally be doing, and so, as I grew up, I feel like I just sort of followed in their footsteps, honestly yes, you, you mentioned, just leading by example, right, having people to model for you service and not to be afraid, right?
Speaker 1:I think so often in this day and age we're like, oh, I see somebody that's pulled over on the side of the road, but what if they're scary? What if they do something to harm me?
Speaker 2:Right and as a woman. Maybe we should, you know be cautious, cause things have happened. Sure, so I get it. You got to have a little bit of that, yeah for sure.
Speaker 1:But at the same time, trusting that if I am, you know, kind of following the prompting of my conscience, the Holy spirit, whatever you want to call it, and I feel compelled to help, then trusting that you're going to be okay, and then maybe this person really needed just you right at that time. And so I like the example. You're talking about small things, the handle on the cupboard door. You know, just you mentioned to you have a sister that is just so thoughtful, she's, she listens, and you know we'll give little things, little skittles on your seat.
Speaker 2:It's Valentine's day or something just like just something to serve someone in a sweet way.
Speaker 1:So, um, that's awesome, and I hear that, like you, just wouldn't have it any other way. Like you, you couldn't just sit back and there's no way yeah, there's.
Speaker 2:there's a few stories that I barely remember as a young kid, that my mom loves to tell, and I don't know if you want me to share?
Speaker 1:Yes, please, I love these stories.
Speaker 2:So one I was pretty young, I think, I don't know, five or six or something, I mean, pretty young and I was in my parents' bedroom, my mom was getting ready and I was just sort of like playing with some toys or something, and I think at one point she said there wasn't really, or maybe I wasn't playing with toys because she actually handed me a crucifix and thought, oh, I can have him play with this, I guess, or whatever. Well, the story is that I kind of remember that, but I don't remember like quite everything. But she came back and I had the crucifix, jesus and the nails and she was like initially really upset because it was like a nice crucifix, it was a gift, like all these things you took it apart yeah and she goes like you know, what did you do?
Speaker 2:and I guess my response was like I was helping Jesus get off the cross, you know. And so I don't know if there's like, um, that's just how I've always been where it's like, if I believe that there's something I can do to help, I'm just going to do it, whether, whether that was the right thing to do, whether I just ruined you, I'm sure my dad put it back together, I'm sure. But you know things like that, you know. And then the only other one that she loves to tell a lot I was 12 years old and I had just finished at St Mary's, a little 10 where we went to grade school, a babysitting class, and in that class you also have a little bit of CPR, the Heimlich, you know, obviously some good like situational awareness, you know, don't let the kid leave your sight, like all that kind of stuff. Well, my mom picked me up there's just her and I and we went to a McDonald's to get McFlurryries, just to kind of celebrate, like sweet. Now you're going to babysit and it's great.
Speaker 2:And while we're there, finding out a little bit later, this is an 80-year-old woman that started choking and you know, I'm sitting there eating my food and my mom was actually the one that was like Garrett, garrett, like she's choking. And I kind of look over I'm like, oh, like she was just kind of staring forward and I walked over to her and I asked her if she was choking, and at that point then she started pointing to her throat and was like nodding, yes, and so I pulled her out of the booth, did the heimlich, it removed the object and I was like, hey, you know, you're doing better now. And she's like, yes, thank you. And you know, I went back to eat my mcflurry. You know, I was like, sweet, that's how it's supposed to work, right, you do the Heimlich and it works. And of course my mom was just like, well, yeah, you just saved her, or whatever. I'm like, well, I don't know, it's like there was a need and I went and fixed it.
Speaker 1:That's right.
Speaker 2:And of course then she chatted with us and it was awesome, but just crazy that it was like an hour before that I learned how to do the Heimlich, you know like it was nuts to think that it was going to happen that quickly.
Speaker 2:And so those are two stories where, it's like, you know, I just sort of, I guess, saw a need. And the second one, my mom really told me that there was a need and so, again, leading that by example, she knew that I probably knew the Heimlich at that point or knew that I could help, and so she prompted me to help, which is just and I'm going to listen to her. Obviously right, she's my mom and she always helps people, so I think that's kind of like the big takeaway. I guess I would say, wow, wow.
Speaker 2:It's just to like, just try, like, just help. I mean, obviously she would have just passed out and like it would have just kept escalating. Yes and as a parent listening to your story as a young boy at five and then 12, helping jesus off the cross, dude you're nailed.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I gotta get like that looks like it hurts. And then, okay, mom, this lady's choking. I've got to use my skills. I just learned they're fresh here we go, let's try this yeah, you know.
Speaker 1:it just reminds me of how god really gifts us in unique ways. There's some kids that would just be like terrified or they'd be crying if they saw somebody in need like that, or wouldn't even notice Jesus on the cross in that way Right and um and so for us as parents, just being able to kind of observe our kids and take time to notice what are?
Speaker 1:things that they naturally are inclined towards. Because I have a child who's 18, almost 19. Just helping him kind of discover what he you know, what his gifts are and what his talents are and and how to align that with a career is just a real thing. We don't want our kids out there floundering or just trying to to write, you know, earn enough money to to meet these certain standards or whatever. But really, um, life gets easier when you're working in the gifting that God has Totally that's more fun.
Speaker 2:You're like you're good at it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, You're like I, maybe I'm just still young, still young, I still love my job.
Speaker 2:I'm like no, Garrett, I think you landed on like what.
Speaker 1:God gifted you with early, so also, I mean, I wasn't expecting the conversation to go this way, but when you graduated high school, did you feel pressure to like go to college and to do what people in your class were doing? That may have been different than what you did.
Speaker 2:I mean a little bit were doing. That may have been different than what you did. I mean a little bit, um, because most of my classmates went to a four year college, Um and I and I also played sports and had college. Uh, college scholarship offers, um, to play that sport and things like that, and, um, at the time, I really just didn't want to like, for whatever reason.
Speaker 2:I'm like man, I like school is great and I love education, of course, but the four year system was just like. I don't know if I want to go do that yet, you know so. At the same time, though, some of my siblings, who all went to four year colleges at least at a minimum we have siblings, masters and things like that but they actually told me like, like, hey, it might not be something you need to do, like it's. It's almost like the intro to what's currently happening, where, like trade schools or certain crafts that you can learn, versus getting a four-year degree, can be just fine and just suit you just fine yeah for some people that want a specific thing, yeah, it's great, go to that college and go get it.
Speaker 2:but, um, for me, I actually went and I wanted to learn Spanish, because I'm working in construction, because it was one again something that you see something needs to be fixed or done, and then you go fix it and do it, and maybe that I thought that's what I was maybe going to do the rest of my life. I don't know. In construction I had a few co-workers that only spoke Spanish and me only speaking English. It was just hard.
Speaker 1:So I'm going to go learn Spanish, you Spanish and me only speaking English.
Speaker 2:It was just hard. So I'm like, well, I'm going to go learn Spanish, you know. And so I went and learned Spanish, um, and volunteered a little bit, kind of following in a couple of sister's footsteps, and um, that's just kind of how it went for me. And then I just went to trade schools after that for paramedic and fire and stuff like that.
Speaker 1:Wow, so what? Where did you learn Spanish, Did you? Just so?
Speaker 2:I asked a professor that some of my siblings had known a Spanish instructor or teacher and he said Guatemala was sort of just where he would recommend, just based on kind of how the language is, because every country right has their dialects, their flow, slang, it's like sometimes you know I forget which word it is um, and they recommended he recommended guatemala. So I quite literally just looked online. It's kind of similar to just me being like okay, this is what I need to do, so I'm just going to do it. And so I looked online and found a website that's like yeah, you can go down there, we hook you up with a host family and you volunteer and take a spanish course while you're there, and so, not that I would probably do this the same way, but I prepaid for everything not really knowing this website.
Speaker 2:I mean I was 19, 18 at the time. And then I, about five days before the trip is four and a half months, I went and told my parents that I needed a ride because I sold my truck I saw you because I paid for everything. So I sold everything I had basically to save up for this few thousand dollar trip or whatever. And so I told my mom I think it was four or five days before the trip hey, I'm going to be in Guatemala for four and a half months learning Spanish. I need a ride to the airport. She's like wait what? And that's just part of kind of growing up. And being brutally honest, as my mom has always said, is one of my lovely qualities, I'm sure, but also, just OK, I need to do this.
Speaker 1:So I'm going to go do it Right.
Speaker 2:And once I really want to do something, sometimes I have like that track vision I want this and I'm going to put everything into it and get that goal, and so that's just kind of how it's always been.
Speaker 1:So I did that Guatemala, and then I did the kind of similar thing in columbia the next year. So I was 19 and then 20 when I traveled. So awesome, and I'm hearing that you made these choices pretty independent of your parents and that one of the things that, um, they offered you was like full financial independence, right Like you want something you got to pay for it, you might have to sell your favorite truck or your starter truck or whatever, if you want to go do this thing
Speaker 1:which is another thing that I feel like isn't happening anymore. It's very rare that parents are like you're totally on your own. You got to work for this, you know college is on you.
Speaker 2:That's an approach that that josh and I have taken with our oldest, and we've seen the same kind of um drive in him it's like well, if I want to get it done, I have to do it, and I think it started with little things like hey, you know, you're, I think. I don't think I got a cell phone until I was 15 or 16 like I was driving right, yeah, and I and I get that.
Speaker 2:maybe it's a little bit different now but for the most part that's hopefully what we're going to sort of implement as parents. But it's sort of started with like, hey, here's the basic phone and if you want a different phone, you're going to pay for it and I would pay for my own phone plan. Um, of course they would help me pitch it. I mean, you're, you're under 18.
Speaker 2:You're not really working that much like a little bit, especially in the summer, but I mean there's going to be times throughout the year where you just don't have any money, and so of course they would help out a lot. Um, but there are definitely times where it's like, hey, you had a full tank of gas at the beginning of the week and you chose to do all these extra things with friends or whatever, and so now you need to put the gas in like we going to fill it up, that's right.
Speaker 2:Obviously, if I need to get to school, it would sort of be like here's a little bit to do it, but it's like slow implementation, which I thought is good, just to kind of help start that responsibility of OK, money in, money out. How do I save? How do I? You know, and that's kind of how you know, lydia's my wife's really good at that. Yes, yes, and I'm learning more. Yes, yes.
Speaker 1:Well, you're. You both are on a great track. I want to hear, too, about just you know. Circling back to the story about seeing a need, feeling a need, being a firefighter You're trained for emergencies but, like families, generally speaking, are not trained for emergencies. For sure this is kind of crazy to think about but you send your kids off to school and they have fire drills right at the school and they know exactly how to get out of the classroom Exactly how to do it.
Speaker 1:Yep what it sounds like where to go, who the line leader is, and then you ask a family. So what's your plan If you have a fire? What happened?
Speaker 2:Dad drives mom. Dad tried to get out of the house, yeah they just run and we don't we've been for ourselves sure, sure, like natural instincts is what we're relying on. That's right, that's right.
Speaker 2:what are a few things that families can do to prepare themselves for an emergency, in your opinion, as being for sure, and I guess, to start to give advice on something like this, I always recommend, like, go look it up, go find a reputable source, of course, because I don't want to give advice that ends up being slightly off or not quite exactly what I mean.
Speaker 1:Sure sure.
Speaker 2:But just kind of the basics would be always have two ways out of every room in your house. So, for example, every bedroom, even to be a bedroom, has to have an escape window or at least something that you can crawl out of or get out of. You have to have more than one way to get out of it, okay, so it's kind of a basic. The second thing would be smoke alarms. They're making it even more intense, like, instead of just one in the hallway by the bedrooms, within whatever it was like eight feet or so, it's like one in each bedroom and in the hallway and you know. So just more of those, just to make sure, um, checking them.
Speaker 2:You know we've run a lot of calls in the fire department where smoke alarms are going off, but it's not because of smoke, it's because they're 10 years old or the batteries are dead or something like that. So sometimes it's just making sure you check those often and then talking with the family, hey, if we're upstairs and there's a fire down here, how are we going to get out? And so one thing that we have in our house we have two of them is like an escape ladder. You know, you just hook it to the kind of the windowsill, throw it over the window and obviously you can kind of picture your own house like where's going to be the best place to do that? Hopefully there's some grass or mulch or something to where, if you kind of miss a couple of steps, you're not getting too badly hurt.
Speaker 2:And it's not like you're concrete and you're 20 feet in the air, 10 feet in the air, whatever, right, and so I think, having a few of those things, but also just talking about it, I mean some people have never talked about- it.
Speaker 2:Right. And so I think just in general, like, hey, here's how we can get out of these situations, and then here's the meeting point. So for like in our situation, it would just be like our cul-de-sac, like out in the middle, maybe on the sidewalk by another family's house, yes, so you're far enough away and if you know, when emergency shows up, fire, police, everybody you're out of the way you're not blocking, they're not sitting there air horning you you know so and as an adult and as the parent you know you would be the one calling 911 and just trying to remain calm, knowing that when you do call 911, which is something I wouldn't recommend everyone practices, obviously, because that'd be the bombard 911.
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 2:But there are certain things that they will ask you immediately. So, knowing those things, you know what, what's the location of your emergency? Um, what is the emergency, things like that to where, knowing where you are, the address, as I learned in this one, I just didn't know exactly the address yes it's hard because it does take a while to then ping your phone, like it just takes a little bit longer.
Speaker 2:But the nature of of the call, the location of the call. They'll ask certain things like that right off the bat, and so just kind of being calm and collected, but also having that information in the back of your mind for when you do call.
Speaker 1:And when you said like just being calm and collected when you're talking to 911, answering their questions, because they're going to prompt you, right? Not just coming up with your own thing, but just waiting for them to kind of ask the question. Answer wait.
Speaker 2:And it's easier said than done. Sure, in the moment, your adrenaline is going to be way up. It's going to be so hard to be calm, it's just getting some of those basics Exactly Perfect.
Speaker 1:Well, and I imagine you know, we have an escape plan we have. Just last year, during September, National Preparedness Month, we bought the emergency ladders that go in the kids room and we actually took videos of them oh sweet.
Speaker 2:Oh, that's awesome.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Because sometimes there's that fear of like I'm going to step over the ledge and you know which I? Love. I think heights are just fun, honestly, but it's still like when you take that first step you have to be really confident and secure that you're not about to just topple over. It is actually pretty intense.
Speaker 1:Yes, and then just practicing how you get out of the upstairs and which door you go out of depending on where the fire is was really eye-opening for our kids and how to just sort of link to each other so that we're all going the same direction. And then also identifying a neighbor, like a block away that we talked to, to say, hey, in case of an emergency, we're going to come to your house.
Speaker 2:It's out of show, perfect. You know, I think, some of the some of the other things. You know some people have more things than other people. In general, their house might be a little bit an easy cause. We see, obviously, a bunch of varieties of home and having a good access, you know a good pathway or having access to the front door and the back door and not having stuff around the stove. You know that's flammable especially, and you know even simple things like when you're cooking, if the handles are pointing outward it's easier to bump that it's. You know just things like that to where you're just being preventative. I think a lot of things I tell my family members when they ask is they ask about how close can the grill be to the house?
Speaker 2:Because grill fires are just, they're common right, and so I ended up looking it up because I wanted to make sure I was giving a good recommendation, because I had just overheard at work, and basically your grill should be at least 10 feet from the home and your fire pit should be 20. That's like give or take it says 10 to 25, but it's like okay. So the grill is 10, fire pits 20.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:And that's 20 feet from like everything 20 feet from the tree right there, 20 feet from your wood fence you know, and then obviously ideally your fire pit would have like rock and other stuff around it, but in general you know, the grill can have pretty big flames and it's a grease fire, so it's actually very hard to put out.
Speaker 2:You have to use chemicals usually to try to smother it versus water and it's just. It can be a pain, obviously, especially if it's up against your house or underneath like an overhang, and you know at that point you're not going to touch it or push it. It's all metal basically, right, so you're not gonna. It'd be way too hot. So keeping things away from the house, um, you know girls are great, but just keep them about 10 feet away from you, my eyes are probably huge Cause I'm going the greasy, you know 80, 20 hamburgers were thrown on there.
Speaker 2:Cause yeah, and then.
Speaker 1:I'm sending my 13-year-old out there to tend it and he's like man, this is cool. The flavor I'm like ugh.
Speaker 2:And for most people how old is your grill? You're not going to replace it all the time.
Speaker 1:I'm not saying I recommend you replace it all the time. It's like 10 years old.
Speaker 2:But they're usually at least 10 years old. Oh, and so you're like yeah, there's a lot of grease buildup and sometimes it just happens.
Speaker 1:Okay, so real quick. What do you do for a grill fire when you've got grease on fire? So if you have an extinguisher.
Speaker 2:That can work, it can help, but usually families only have well, I guess that was the other thing. I have fire extinguishers on every level of the house, including the garages, but they're usually the smaller homeowner ones, right? They don't last that long, um, and so you might be able to put a good knock on it as kind of a new phrase that we're maybe using. Um, you might be able to knock the fire down a little bit, but, um, especially with the lid closed, you know it still has enough air to kind of keep the fire going. So you might not even be able to get to it necessarily. Um, but that's kind of the best thing you do is use your fire extinguisher, um, something that actually works more as like a blanket to try to smother it um versus water cools fire.
Speaker 2:That's how it puts out the fire. It cools it down. Um, and it just doesn't work with you know kitchen fires, usually things like that, and so, um, at that point it's like you do your best, but if you're not getting it, hopefully someone else is calling 911 while you're trying to put it out, okay, and at that point you just try to figure out, like, is it safe enough for me to keep doing this, or do I kind of need to back out and let First Spinner show up? Firefighter show up.
Speaker 1:Yes, yes, okay, folks, get your fire extinguishers today. Extinguishers today, one on every floor, one close to the garage or grill. Wherever you're, you're doing your cooking, because you don't want your kids to be caught in a situation where they're trying to to help and I think their natural response would be water, water yeah, for sure, and they could really get hurt really quickly that water will just sort of like it'll cause like little explosions when you put it on there so um, you know, it's okay to try.
Speaker 2:I mean, it could be something else that caught, like on the grill. Maybe it was like your the glove that you had right there that caught. I mean, who knows, maybe water will put it out, but uh, the extinguisher would be best. Usually it's an abc extinguisher, which are just different types of extinguishers but that's kind of the general home one.
Speaker 2:It sort of encompasses everything, um, but just you can get the medium one. It's not huge like the fire department has, and it's not just a little itty bitty, but just to have several around the house and know where they are. Yes, just read real quick too of how to use it, because you got to pull a pin first before you can use it and aim it and things like that.
Speaker 1:Yes, okay, okay, good advice. Good advice Well let's talk about that after action review that you use.
Speaker 2:For sure yeah.
Speaker 1:You know, emergency responders use what is an after action review. You have an incident, and then what?
Speaker 2:Yeah. So we call it an AAR, or after action report, after action review, and it's basically sort of like in sports when the coach would say, hey, after a game. It's like, hey, what did we do? Well, what do we need to work on? And then you go to practice and you work on those things right, but you also try to better the good things, and so you know, we have a lot of examples growing up, of course, of an AAR. We just have the official word for it.
Speaker 2:So we'll have a fire, even like a maybe a more intense medical call or something to where usually a chief or a safety officer or your lieutenant or captain will say, hey, we're going to do a quick AAR, and we basically just get together. And oftentimes they ask each person hey, from your perspective, how do you think that went? And each person will say, hey. So I was with this crew, we were assigned this task. Here's how it went.
Speaker 2:Maybe you know it was hard to get over the radio. The communication was was muffled and we couldn't figure it out, so we kind of just had to do what we thought was right initially. Um, maybe, for that crew everything went well, right, okay, we thought it was great, and so you kind of go around and talk to each person and, generally speaking, and hopefully it's the case where most things went well hey, you know we're trying to do this, so hopefully most things went well, yeah, but there's usually always something for the next one that you can make a little smoother, a little better, and if it's trainable versus like hey, these cars were parked and we couldn't get around or whatever If it's trainable it's like, hey, let's go throw another ladder, because it just wasn't that efficient when we put the ladder up against the house initially or whatever. Then we go train on it and hopefully that next time it's just one step better, one step better, and you continue to do the things you did right.
Speaker 1:Awesome. So you're looking back at what just happened, everybody's part in it, everybody's perspective of how it went, and then figuring out what do we want to do the same next time because it worked. And then, what do we have room for improvement on and can we train ourselves to improve in that area?
Speaker 1:for sure hello, family life. If you're listening to this, think about the car ride to school. You can do an aar on that. Think about, uh, having grandparents over for the weekend. They're staying the weekend and, uh, you know how did that go. How did you guys enjoy it? What do you wish that, uh, you could do with them next time they're in town or whatever? And I imagine that this would be, you know, going from one thing to another in family life, I feel like most of the time we're not looking back at what we just did, we're just focused on the next thing and we don't maybe take the intentional time to review something that we just did. We're just focused on the next thing and we don't maybe take the intentional time to review something that we just did. And so what a lot of our families that participate in our coaching and our community here at Families of Character do is a weekly family huddle.
Speaker 1:I think you and Lydia are also doing the weekly family huddle, and so what a great platform to just integrate an AAR, right? It's just like, hey guys, what have we done? Maybe it's out of the ordinary this week? Let's just take a look at that and review it and figure out what we can do and what we want to keep.
Speaker 2:And I didn't realize back then, but as kids my parents would do AARs every night at dinner, because we always ate together and have dinner when there wasn't sports and other things going on. But when we did eat together, all at the table, all 10 of us um, it's almost exactly the same. My dad and mom would sit at one end you know they're next to each other and we'd almost sit in order of age in a weird way, but maybe not. But they would go around and say, hey, I want you to tell me about your day at school. And they would usually say their day at school. Hey, what?
Speaker 2:was something good that you did for someone else or what was something just good in general about the day, and one fun example that one of my other siblings use is a chocolate chip, which is your God moment. And so you say you know how did you see God either work through you, work through someone else towards you, or whatever it was. You know what was a positive, what was a negative and what was your chocolate chip. And so if there was a negative, um, especially with really young kids, it's really cute, you know to whatever like.
Speaker 2:Oh, I dropped my pencil.
Speaker 2:You know, I don't know, like sometimes they just don't know what the negative is and, um, you can then say in that moment oh okay, well, how can we turn that into a positive, or how can we keep that from happening? Or you know, even if it's someone else that you feel like did something wrong to you well, do you know that person? Can you maybe reach out or whatever? Whatever the steps are, and if it's not, we can pray for them or we can maybe do something different so that they don't react in that way. So, in a fun way, my parents actually did that all the time growing up and now a lot of my siblings I'm sure all of them do that. Now. You go around the table, just like we do at work. You know the leader goes around the table and you talk to the parents about your day and the siblings, and it's like the same thing as an AR.
Speaker 1:Yes, You're training them from a young age to number one. Recognize the good. Let's celebrate the wins, guys. Right, I mean, this was a big fire. What did we do? Well, right, it's the same thing in a first grade classroom.
Speaker 1:You know like, hey, you thanked Mrs Joseph for doing such and such. That is wonderful, that's a win. What was something that was hard, right? So you're just conditioning kids at a young age to notice the good, recognize where they can improve, right? This is sort of like an examination of conscience, you know, on a mild level.
Speaker 1:It's just where can you do something different and do you owe anybody an apology, or is there something that you could do to improve your role on the team here at work or with your family, so that everybody works together more smoothly, and this is, we have better outcomes?
Speaker 2:Absolutely, and I think the AAR is almost just a condensed version of what parents do every day anyway. So if you see your son, you know, pick up a bag that someone dropped at the grocery store or hold the door open for someone or whatever, you probably compliment them oh, thank you, that was so nice of you for holding the door open for them. And then if they, you know, like me as a young kid, I would break things or whatever, and then you'd get in trouble for breaking something or say, hey, don't throw that's an object that can break you know, it's not a ball or whatever.
Speaker 2:Yes, and so if you condense that all down, at the end of the day it would be don't throw mom's decorations because they will break. Good job holding the door open for someone. And you know you're basically just listing it out, but you do it throughout the day without maybe realizing. This is just a way, maybe for everyone to sort of collect and realize what happened today as a whole.
Speaker 1:Yes, and this is bringing awareness to kids. It's helping them with their executive functioning skills. Right, If I assess how I did today, that helps me plan for tomorrow and this is a skill that many of our kids are leaving home without is the ability to plan, to see what's coming next and then to be prepared for that.
Speaker 2:So this is a gentle, natural, organic way of just conditioning to them for that.
Speaker 1:I love that. That is so good, okay, well, we've covered the whole gamut, man from burning hot tub, swim structures, to what it looks like to be gifted in an area and to just naturally respond to God's call in your life and then seek a career that matches up with your past and then also just like, okay, the reality of family life and going in different directions and circling back up and how can we make good use of our time and kind of assessing and doing those AARs?
Speaker 1:in order to prepare our kids and to have that unity and that connection in the family. So, garrett, this was awesome.
Speaker 2:Yeah, absolutely. Thanks for having me, it was a pleasure.
Speaker 1:Yes, thanks for blessing us and we're going to link a little article about Thanks for blessing us and we're going to link a little article about about Garrett here in our show notes so that you can see this in. You know, live this fire, the flames, the news interview that he did. I think it's a really important conversation with our kids about seeing a need and filling a need. So please be sure to have these conversations with your kids. Have a family emergency readiness plan at your fingertips. Discuss it in a weekly family huddle fingertips, discuss it in a weekly family huddle.
Speaker 1:And just remember that you are very much equipped to prepare your kids on how to step in and help out in just a moment's notice. So if you feel like you're not, you know you're not there or you don't have that history yourself. There's always room to improve and to learn and to journey along together, to be that person to see a need and fill a need. So if you found this helpful, please share it with people in your circles and you can always visit our website, familiesofcharactercom. And again, thanks for joining us for another episode of the Families of Character show. We'll catch you again real soon.
