Street Farbrengen Episode 126 - Bitachon Is Not a Win Button

When does faith mean pushing forward—and when does it mean letting go?
In this week’s Street Farbrengen, we wrestle with a simple question: when a business deal is struggling, at what point does bitachon mean persevering, and at what point does it mean moving on? The conversation uncovers a deeper issue: perhaps we misunderstand what bitachon is in the first place.
Is it confidence that things will work out exactly as we want? Or is it something else entirely?

Drawing on Chassidus, business experience, miracle stories, Shabbos observance, and the debates that followed Gimmel Tammuz, we explore the difference between faith and wishful thinking, lamaila min haseichel - above intellect -  common sense, miracles and nature, and what it means to be guided without becoming desperate.

We conclude:
Bitachon is not certainty about an outcome as it is the calm confidence of being guided.
A raw conversation about faith, uncertainty, decision-making, self-knowledge, and the challenge of trusting G-d without abandoning reality.

Transcript

When To Trust Or Walk Away

0:00

Where is the line of when a person should have betuchen versus in an extreme sense when a person should give up? Let's just use an example of like a business deal. When should I have betuchen and continue working on the deal, even though there are signs that are things are struggles or challenges, and you know, a lot of signs are pointing to the fact that you should just give it up and just move on to the next deal, versus you just keep on trucking forward and trying to push through with the idea that your Batochen is clear that your future goal and outcome is is in hand. Oh

Bitachon Is Not A Win Button

1:10

no. I mean, that's not a bad thing necessarily for bringing. I'll tell you why you're triggering me, because the underpinning of what you're asking is really based on betahin means, and we've spoken about this so many other times, the gold at the end of the rainbow. Yes. I mean, to a certain degree, yes. When do I give up? When do I have betachin? No, I'm saying That's the way you asked. Yeah, well, not when do you have Betachen, but when when is it clear that the Betachen that you're talking about should not maybe you're deluding yourself and thinking that you have Batachen? No. You have Batachen. What is That's my point of why you're triggering me. What is the context and the target of Batachen? Okay. So you answer me. What do you think Batachen is? What is the target? Batachen means that if I go put money into Wall Street and there's a depression, a 1930, whatever it is, does that mean I keep on going because I know that that um You're being taken care of. You believe that the Kaylee that you're making is gonna be blessed. However, you want to phrase it. Well, I want to know how you phrase it. That's the whole point. I I hear the question. Let me explain to you what what I mean as triggering me. You're using beta as a way as as as a because I have betachin, I will be successful. And you're asking, therefore, even if everything in the business um format that's in front of me is saying drop it, you're saying, no, but have a tachem. Okay. Okay, so is that that's what you as you think, oh, so maybe I should have a tachum, even though you know it's like the bank went bankrupt. Maybe I should go and get my money out of it. Yeah, I mean, when you when you say things that make it in the extreme, I understand. I'm talking about the nuance. I understand you understand, but the nuance is where life is. I I get that. When you get slapped by a two by four, it's no big deal to wake up. So I I I guess the yeah, the the the more nuance of the question though is how far do you take Lemila

Using Common Sense With Faith

3:55

Minha Sechel? That you don't use Sekel to m to help determine very in my estimation, and who am I other than me, it's very simple. You're relying not on your sechel, but you're applying your sechel. But you could okay, explain that more. Meaning to say again, it's it's so you talk about nuance. It's the old story. Does God I'm gonna ask you a religious Hasidic Jew? Does God make the um storekeeper his money? Yes. Okay. If he's should he put up a for sale sign to get new customers in? Yes. Why? Have betakin. Sit there like a donut and wait for people to walk in the door. Don't even make a sign that you sell shoes. Oh, so you can say, no, well, that's crazy. Okay. No, it's not that it's crazy. It's still Hashem wants you to work and put in effort, but your work and effort is not going to be determining what your actual outcome is going to be. It's I understand that. But what's your outcome regarding? In other words, you're saying to me, if I'm in a business venture and it is not just that it reaches an impasse, you're saying a little bit more than that, right? Yeah. Okay. And it's and all your investors leave, and you have no more money, the lights are out, I don't know, blah, blah, blah. And you don't have absolutely any um avenue to keep it open. Sure. So what does it mean, Lamylaminacycle, to keep on to come to this, to come to the office and sit in the dark? So that seems stupid, but it maybe can you forget about it. Maybe. Well, now we get into another question. Lamylamina sacle, does that mean stupid? That's my that's my question. So lamyelamina stupid means stupid? I I I think it could appear that way to certain people, yes. I don't care what it appears to certain people that we don't know we're talking about. No, I don't actually think it means stupid. Then what's your question? My my question is it you could even feel stupid doing let's take it. Let's take let's take a let's take the famous question that does not apply to you or I that I believe, because it again it's an extreme. The person has his business open seven days a week. He makes 80% of his profit on Friday night to Saturday afternoon, and the Rebbe tells you shut it down, or Hashem tells you to shut it down. You're gonna you're gonna be total. That sounds stupid. It seems stupid. We know it's not. Okay, so I can't speak about the unusual stories that happen that lo and behold, all of a sudden everybody starts coming in on Sunday because Saturday went to the football game. I I can't speak to that. But let's so let's not go there. Let's talk about the average Alpiteva, you're saying he's gonna lose 80% of his business. Okay. So you're the guy in that position. What does it mean you have Betachim? You trust that Hashem is going to figure out how to give you the money some other way. What does it mean some other way? Not in a uh not in a in unkosher method. No, what do you mean? I'm gonna close my eyes, close the door on Shabbos, and know that Hashem is still gonna take care of it. Maybe you're but talking us to go into a different business. Okay, so I'm asking, how do you test it out, but I mean it's like hello? You live in this. We spoke about this in the last Febrang or two Febrangas ago. You have to be grounded, man. You can't live this is coming up because this just happened in my shoulder. Does Hasidis say that everybody has a spark of Mashiach? Yes. Okay. If I come to you and sit down and say, let's forbrink because I want to tell the audience that I'm Mashiach, would you be disturbed about that? Quite. Why? It says it. It's nuance. Well, what is this nuance? You learnt a new word in the dictionary. What is it, nuance? The idea that somebody would get up and say that would imply that they're mashukuna and not actually in uh alignment with what it means that everybody has a spark of Mashiach. Okay. And and if and if the Rebis has if I have a a store that makes 80% of its business on Sunday. Saturday. I'm sorry, on Shabbos, and I'm hoping that on Sunday everyone will come streaming in. It's probably even less than that. But by the way, in America businesses almost live like that when it comes to December, right? Yeah. That's besides the point. Okay. So and I say, okay, Hashem could make it that I start making money during the week. I uh and I have Bitaka and that's possible. Okay. I mean that now we're getting into how to ride the the the waves of life. So how long do I wait to decide that maybe I should try a different avenue? That's what I'm asking. You tell me. I don't know. You use your you use your common sense. But does that now fall into the realm of using my sachel to try to figure out not figure out? The money's not coming. The people are not walking into the store because it's made that way for some reason to only be on Shabbos, whatever that means. And now I have to find a different avenue of Parnasa. What's wrong with that? And there is where I really have to apply betachin. Because I have no idea what business to go into. Again, betachin is the sense at the very least of being guided. So you're being guided? Not being and listening for that guidance. That's what I believe is betachin. So you're listening to that guidance is Lamila Minasechel. Because you're now Lamila Minasechel

Closing On Shabbos Without Panic

10:35

means Lamila from your sakel. What's the what are you trying to differentiate there? You're using the Abish's sakel. The Abish is gonna guide you. Okay, so therefore you're saying Okay, so what when we were talking about coming from your core, yeah. And so now apply it to that idea that we've been discussing for a bunch of weeks now. If you're coming from a place of your core, meaning you're uh You know what, I'm gonna hit the jugular vein. Uh-oh. Pretend you were around on base Thomas. Right? I mean, I know you were alive, but I'm talking about in Chabad. And Gimel Thomas hits. So you're not a newcomer. Should I? And I was convinced 100% that the Reb is at the very least gonna bring Mashiach, but he is Mashiach. Okay. Is it uh and there's two groups in Chabad today? Flag wavers and whatever else the other group is called. Does the group that doesn't waive flag not having Batachin? In what? In in the Rebbe Big Mashiach? And the other way around, are the flag wavers completely insane? Because the other side would say yes. So it's a very interesting question you're asking. What's Lamila Mina Seychel? Yeah, that's a great it is a great question. That was that was really the underpinning uh struggle in in uh N Dal. Was you know, are you gonna apply Seychel or are you gonna apply Lamila mina sechel? Okay, I hear the question. Okay. What's the answer? I have to think about it. I don't know. How come you haven't been thinking about it all along? I mean, I've thought about it just in different ways. I mean, this is how we started Strefer Breaking six years ago. But uh no, so I'm gonna suggest to you my lamina sechel means it's not up to me to have to explain a question that I have. What do you mean by that? Okay, like we're going through oh you're doing three prakamade, but the people who are doing one parake Ramba, we're right now going through all the laws of uh uh Malacca on Shabbos, right? There's some weird stuff there. Okay, yeah. Yeah, okay. Uh in Halakha in general, there's some weird things there. And it's hard. I'll forget about halakha. I'll give you the con the the the this is the um my typical what I bring up when this comes into the question of Seichel, the Mayama Seichel. Everything is free choice, but God knows what you're gonna do. Can you explain that? There's a lot of different ways of explaining it, but very basically, yes, Hashem can know what you're going to do, and he can also give you the opportunity. How do you understand that in Seychel? I mean, ultimately it's something you're not gonna You're not gonna be able to fully get it yet. Not fully. You're not gonna get it. But who says you have to? Tayr says you have free choice. No, okay, the Rambam writes that we have to try the most we can to understand and explain things. Yeah. Because it's a miswhit to do that. Not to defend or to I like the more ideas like defending God and defending the Torah, I'm going to come up with answers to questions that are really valid questions. Right. As opposed to what does God want from me here? In other words, you're what we're doing, it occurs to me, is we're saying when I'm faced with a challenge, Bethachin is competing against business sense. Why do we assume that? I mean, I don't know if I assume that. It's just Well, your question is uh that was just nuance, but it that's what your question is. Okay, fine. Fine. Yeah. Why do we right away assume Because yeah, I assume that if you're activating uh power of Lamylam in a Seychol, that means it's going to be contrary to Seychol. Right. That you told me before no. Now you're saying yes? I'm saying that's the economy, it's contrary. In other words, it's stupid. It could appear that way to a person who is not in the I think it appears to you. And I think it appears to the average person who then says, I will close my eyes. Either one of two things. I'm going to close my eyes and keep going to the store that doesn't make money. Right? Yeah. Because I'm having bataklin. Now, is it true that God could pull a rabbit out of his hat, so to speak, and make your money on shop? Of course. But we're not we don't have that. Um So the fact that we we focus a lot of stories of miracle stories. Do we focus we we f we put a lot of emphasis? Which by the way is new in Chabad. Is that the uh that was kind of my question. Is that the reason why they never did that? Or is could that be one of the reasons? The famous the famous line. The re the Rebbe had a whole letter about this. He had the question to the Fridaika Rebbe. Yeah, I'm saying the re Friday Rebbe's response back to him was this was this a point of to a degree there was a little bit of a split there. And not only that, but the Rebbe writes in the and says in the brengas in the later years, in the old nuns, of Shnas and Nissim in particular. Now is a time where we can bring in a little bit of Polish Hasidic Hanhagas and talk about miracles if that's what is needed. Trevor Burrus, Jr. Yeah, but I'm saying is the reason you don't do that because the expectation for a miracle in the way that is being laid out and described ends up undoing the expectation of work on yourself, to know exactly who you are and what's functioning, and do it for the sake of the Abishta and work through what's going on. So if I am gonna let's go back to our idea of uh the guy on Shabbos and his and his store, and he shuts it down. Is so let's say it's me. So I'm thinking to myself, this is insane. Why am I doing this? Right? I have those kinds of thoughts. Well, I have to ask myself, why do I have those thoughts? What is the nature of those thoughts? Where do they come from? Right? Well, I can say I can come to the conclusion that um very simply I think this beta and God thing is nuts. Or it has a kvul, it has a limitation. Okay, now I can go down that road about where's that coming from? That's called knowing yourself, right? Sure. Okay. So the I that's one side. The I the other thing is that to go and say, and this is what you're saying, maybe I should just sit in the store and wait for, so to speak, God to make

Mashiach Claims And Healthy Nuance

18:50

a miracle. Yeah. Okay. And he's having a lot of betachim. Yeah. Of course, his wife is gonna walk out on it because he has no money, but that's besides the point. Okay. So is that betachin? I don't know what's going on internally for that guy, whether he actually has beta in an hour or whether he's being an idiot. I I have no clue. But you're but well, is your question theoretical? No. Okay, what's quite practical. Okay, what's your practical situation that you're in? Let's keep it with the business example. There are plenty of deals that I'm involved in that you could look at and say, give it up already and move on to the next one. But I continue to fight for it, I continue to come up with different strategies in order to come from different angles. When you're fighting and having those different strategies, are you feeling the power of God in your sails of your ship? Sometimes. Or do you feel that if I keep on pushing on, God will because I'm having bitachin, because I'm pushing on, therefore, God will put that pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. Sometimes. Both the I have experienced both. Yeah, my life. Which one has more okay? We know the answer. Go on. That to me is btachin. What is the what is the Chavez Sayyidarebbe brings out? You have complete surety. Calm. Okay, so you have these deals. First of all, you already know that you have friends in the business, or even yourself, have had the experience that three years after you worked on a deal, boom, it comes through. And you weren't even working on it. Yeah. Okay. So the question is not because I'm gonna put out extra sweat and extra hours and beating a dead horse, that therefore I'm having batache. That's like a little warped, I think, no? Yes. Okay, so let's try to parse it into one sentence. What is batache? I'm gonna say I can come up with a lot of lines, you know. I'm sure you can make them and make them up and sound like I'm smart or something. But I'm gonna say that batachein is the warmth of a guide. The warmth of guidance. Now guidance comes in many ways. You have to know how you feel inside the thoughts that you may come up with. Um, did you let's go back to our example. Did I exhaust all the different ways in which I could try to get more business when I shut down my business on Shadows? But I'm not desperate. You know, we spoke about this before. That I've noticed that in certain chiburas, specifically chasidic khiburas, but I'm sure it's not only chasidic, it's probably in Musarish Musas, which I've never attended, but I give them, but I don't attend them. I know. At a Muslim Khaburas, there's a certain patina of desperation. The desperation of this idea, this toira, this mimer, whatever is going to be the answer to all that bothers me. So it's the security of mentorship and guidance. It's not the desperation of mentorship and guidance. So, yes, I close my shoe, my store on Shabbos. People are not coming, 80% goes drops off. Is there a way for me to go and get people from Sunday to Friday? Seemingly, the reason why it's difficult for this guy to close on Shabbos is because he didn't see a way. And he's relying on Tevin. Sure. Okay. So now he's going to come up with I don't know, a sign in the window that'll bring people in on Monday. Okay? Okay. Okay. The beta is that the sign will work. Sure. And that he has betachim that this is a good idea because the Abishta gave me a good idea. And what

Miracle Stories And Knowing Yourself

23:40

if that doesn't work? Then you try again. Now, if you run out of avenues, what's wrong with saying I'll sell my store that makes 80% of its money on Shabbos to somebody who's not Jewish and I will go out and open up another business. I'll become the guitar player in a band that I always wanted to be. I okay. I I hear that. I guess if you have a limited amount of ideas that you could try things with that works. Well you can go for advice. Okay. I hear. I hear that. I I think No, what did I say? You said the warm you said the warmth of guidance. Yeah. Because the the what when I was thinking when you said come up with the line is that whatever the line is, I don't have as piffy pithy of a line as you, but the the experience and feeling of minuka with your movement of like of being. Again, the manuka, is it at the end result? No, no. Or is it in the travel? It's in the travel for sure. But the travel is what am I gonna do with this? Well, you once said to me about your the when you really felt yourself as who you were when you said I'm not gonna break Shabbos anymore. So that was going over the Gvul of Teva. That was Batachen. I mean, you're calling you're saying that it was Batachen. I don't why do you say that that was Batachen? For me, it was like there was no probably giving up a couple of other things too, honey. Yes. But what did that what do you mean that that was a Batachen thing? That you had Batachen that life would be fine. I don't know what was going through your head. Uh-oh, you're saying like, yeah, I mean I didn't really care about the outcome about what I was gonna lose. Yeah, well, yeah, because why? You were 17? Well, you didn't care about the outcome. I'm saying like I knew what I was giving up, but I was like f I was focused on the on the keeping of Shabbos, not what I was letting go of. Why? Because you had bataha. You may have been unconscious about it, but you had batacha. Okay. So I mean, we've spoken about this so much, you know. Blending miraculous into nature and their partners. You know, one of the interesting pieces in in Chidis, uh, I'm thinking about a mimer that I learned all the time. Um Pandereba is the Vort that there's Das Tachdu and then there's Das Elian. Das Elian is all there is is God, basically. And Das Tachdu, and then there's me, and there's a thing called God called Ayan, right? Because he's called nothing, whatever, because he's a blank, because he doesn't fit in with what my central base is, which is Ilam Haza and all of its natural um proclivities and dimensions and measurements. And both are true. How are both true? So the Rebbe asks in this Maimer a very fundamental question, essentially saying there's a in the question, there's a difference between saying God runs the world, meaning that you find out that Teva is really Elocus, okay, that really teva is elukus, and the Rebbe says, but the uh he's talking he's talking about a Maimer from the Frielik Rebba. The language of the Rebbe's of the Friliq Rebbe's Maimer is bringing down La Mylamina Teva into Teva. Okay? So the Rebbe's contrasting La Mylamina Teva into Teva versus Teva is a lacus. Yeah. How do you know Teva is a lacus? He says, when you have a miracle, you realize God runs the world, right? Okay, so let's go back to the Patachin. The guy's sitting in a store, and he's saying, you know what? The merging of Das Elin and Das Tachten means that God is going to bring people in all of a sudden a stampede on every Sunday. And I realize that all along Teva was run by God as Elecus. What's the other contrast that's the contrast that Rebbe brings out in the mind? But that's not La Mylamata and Teva. Yeah, that's a miracle. That tells you that Teva really is Elocus. Yeah. What's the difference between Teva is really Elocus versus La Mylamina Teva

Bringing The Beyond Into Nature

29:10

in Teva? Yeah. So what are you saying? That means Teva. That means Teva. What's the difference between the two? Forget about why uh To use that example. So we just said that that example is a nace, and then you just know that Teva is Elocus. So then what what would be the thinking if you're using Lamila Minuteva in Teva? That you decided not to give up right away. Because I know what your question was originally. I'm not gonna I'm not gonna give up my business, I'm not gonna fall apart, I'm gonna close it down on Shabbos, and I'm going to find ways in which keeping Shabbos will affect the weekdays of my business. But the Rebbe asks even a more interesting question to me, and that is in that mimora, and that is, he says, wait a second, if you look at Pesaf Eliyahu, which is what the Rebbe's mimers on, it says, Anthu Afikas Esratek, you brought out ten Sviros, Lana Handim, to manage the world. Okay. So first he asks, why in the mimer by the Friday Rebbe does he say Lamila Minateva is the much higher level than Esra Sviris? And why just go to the level up a little bit? Sure. Why go to the essence of what basically is what the Rebbe Frida Karebbe says? Antu Chad Baloi Bahushma. But then the Rebbe asks even a more interesting question. Since it says Va Antu Afikas Essa tekuninim, you brought out ten tekunim and you manage the world with ten spheres, the word is there, you. Why do you have to bring in Lamila Teva to begin with? In other words, running the world does not mean Lamaila Minateva, according to this mind. Yeah. Right? Okay. Okay. So what's your pata? Now what's your patachin? Yeah. What's patachin? I'm gonna say to you that ultimately I think, and I know you're gonna say, yeah, you like to say this, and I'm not sure if I understand this thought. The ultimate of patachin is Moisha Rabainu standing at the sea, and Hashem says to him, Lift up your arm, stretch out your rod, and split the sea. And instead of Moish Rabbaining Rain Rabbeinu saying, Who me or this rod, he's confident he could do it. That's beta. Okay. Okay, and if you're in a place where everything is stacked up against you and you can't find a way to bring people into your store, then you should have betachin that you could sell it. Because the betain is non-specific, really, about this store. Yeah right? Maybe Hashab is testing you that you should find a better way of making uh um uh parnas. Yeah. I don't know. So you put you play the you play the you play with the field of the f that you're on. But all the way through you feel but you know but you're gonna have an outcome and you're taken care of. Okay. This was very helpful. Does that answer the story the question? I'm not sure. I'm not sure, but it's been very helpful regardless. And I'm going to uh I need to think about this because this is this was very knowing you. I don't think you're having a question of Batachla in your situation. You're having a question in yourself. Okay, meaning what? Um I don't know. You wanna you want me to uh have everybody else listen? I mean meaning you could keep it in generalities if you'd like. Meaning, if you're working on a deal for a long time and the deal's not materializing. Right? Is that

Moshe At The Sea Applied

33:20

a good way of saying it? Sure. Okay. Did the guy say, I'm out of here, I don't want to take your phone call? Sometimes. Well then why would you keep on? If he says the deal's off, I'm out of here. And you have nothing new to give him. I'm gonna keep calling it because Hashem is gonna make him change his mind. Is that betaka? No, that's ridiculous. Okay. Now, on the other hand, you come up with an idea that could actually change his mind. Yeah. Batachim means you are Moisha Rabinu standing on the ocean with your rod in your hand. That's betakin. So who's doing it? Well, on one hand, you're gonna say, well, it's God who's doing it, but on the other hand, you're having 100% confidence in yourself. Because you have betakhin. Okay. I got it. Okay.