Ep. 51: Author Kevin Lewis--"Can You Trust Me This Much?"

Kevin Lewis has been a coach, teacher, singer, performer, business owner, podcast host and an author.  I know him personally and will add that he is a super nice guy--who encourages and affirms everyone he meets. Kevin's new book, "Can You Trust Me This Much?" comes out in June 2023. You can preorder the book here to get a signed copy:
https://www.hizworks.com/the-book 

I read the book and enjoyed his entertaining stories, perceptive observations and life lessons that speak to all of us. It's a great read. What prompted Kevin to write this book? From Kevin's website, www.HizWorks.com:

"A mustard seed. God asks us to have faith the size of an itty, bitty, tiny mustard seed. Now that shouldn’t be so hard,  should it? And yet, so many times we experience difficult, even traumatic events in our lives that make  us ask questions like, “If God loves us and wants the  very best for us, why  does He allow such horrible things to happen?”

For Kevin, it was a mass shooting in his town of Buffalo, Minnesota that brought him to ask this important question. And each time he prayed,  he heard the words, “Can you trust me this much? Those words kept replaying in his  mind over and over again. 

Kevin eventually wrote those six words down on strips of paper and Scotch-taped a mustard seed to each one. He proceeded to place the strips in random places. They were in his house, his business, on his computer, and even in his car.

What Kevin discovered was how the traumatic events we all face in life can either destroy  us or bring  us to place where we realize our pain has a purpose. And  when we finally get real and have the crazy courage to face the big hurts - those life-changing events - we can answer with certainty, “Yes…yes, I can trust you this much.”

A portion of the proceeds from Kevin's book will go to help people through The Least of These Ministries.

Also hear from Kevin on his podcast, The Next Step.
Find it here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-next-step/id1613368608?i=1000556141208
Follow his podcast on Instagram at @thenextstepwithkevinlewis

Find Kevin
Instagram: @officiallykevinlewis and @hizworks
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kevin.lewis.98499/
All links to all platforms: https://linktr.ee/officiallykevinlewis

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Transcript

Stephanie Nelson, Host (00:00):

Well, I would like to welcome my friend Kevin Lewis to the Pivotal People Podcast. Kevin and I met at a writer's workshop, gosh, almost two years ago, had so much fun getting to know each other. If you haven't been to a writer's workshop, you need to go to one because you meet all these people with fascinating stories who are writing books about it. Kevin has, and you can only describe his life as an adventure with a wide range of interesting activities. He, you know, growing up was super involved in sports. His dad was an amazing athlete. He has had career experience in so many areas. He has been in broadcasting radio and television broadcasting. When you hear his voice, you'll understand why he's a musician. And he has been a teacher for over a decade. He has worked in a family business as a restaurant for over a decade, and he has also been an owner of an athletics program, an owner of a gym, combining his love of being a teacher with his love of sports. And today we're talking to him because he has written this wonderful book called, can You Trust Me This Much? It's all about really just being able to trust God as tagline is finding hope, courage, and purpose, and the gentle and sometimes jarring nudges of the spirit. So Kevin, thank you so much for being with us. I appreciate you taking the time.

Kevin Lewis, Author (01:25):

Absolutely. Stephanie, I'm honored to be here.

Stephanie Nelson, Host (01:27):

You know, before we start talking about your book, I'd love to hear a little more about who you are and what you're doing these days and kind of what brought you to this point of wanting to write this book.

Kevin Lewis, Author (01:37):

Oh, yes. A as you, you, you touched on so many of the things, and, and I will tell you that the idea of writing the book was only slightly below the idea of being a women's gymnastics coach, <laugh>, I, I, I growing, I never ever thought I would move out of the state of Virginia, let alone 1200 miles away to Minnesota. And again my, my sports were football and wrestling, and I had a sister who did gymnastics, but that was about my only connection. And, and a again, to the idea of, of coaching girls seemed to be so foreign. But again, it, it, it was one of those top tier life experiences that again, I, I wouldn't, wouldn't have traded for anything.

Stephanie Nelson, Host (02:25):

So you had sat in your book that you grew up in Virginia. You lived in Virginia, and then you had this opportunity kind of out of the blue to buy a gym clearing like Buffalo, Minnesota, a little tiny town, 1200 miles away. Right? So you picked up and moved. You would never even, you know, as you said, you had never coached gymnastics, but that's where your story kind of started. I,

Kevin Lewis, Author (02:47):

I had spent 10 years in business with my parents, and I love my parents dearly. We, we had I'll say there was a fair misunderstanding on both sides. And, and that's fine. It, it, it, it

Stephanie Nelson, Host (03:00):

Didn't that happens, didn't

Kevin Lewis, Author (03:01):

End well in the beginning, but it ends well in the end. And so it was just an opportunity. I, I had been a teacher and I left the teaching profession in pursuit of like, I've gotta make some money. And I, I knew what my coaches, my coaches were still coaching when I became a teacher, and I knew they were at the top of the pay scale. And I thought, my goodness gracious, like, wow, I, I mean, I know what I can go do and work for with my family. And so I, I chased, chased the dollar. But even during that time with my, my parents, I kind of justified it, well, I'm, I'm helping these kids learn, you know, life skills and, and to customer service and that sort of thing, but it's just not the same as far as like, you know, working with kids on, on something, be it schoolwork or, or my first love with athletics. And when the opportunity in Minnesota opened up, I was like, I've gotta go chase this down. And so I think it was good timing all the way around. And then again, it was, it was definitely the start of a whole new world. My first winter up there was the fourth earliest winter in Minnesota history, and I had seen snow. I love to snow ski, but that was otherworldly.

Stephanie Nelson, Host (04:10):

Well, you talk about, you know, when we think about sports, people might think about the competitive aspect of sports or the, you know, physical benefits of sports, but you talk in your book about a really special experience that takes the whole experience of being on a team and having a relationship with a coach to really a spiritual level. Would you mind sharing the story that we talked about earlier, about your experience first as a player benefiting from that and then later as a coach?

Kevin Lewis, Author (04:40):

Yeah, absolutely. I, I love every chapter. Somebody asked me once, what's your favorite? I can't pick a favorite. They're like children. But the, if there's a connection between two chapters, it would be chapters 20 and 24. And my, my, that first experience I had my, I was growing up in, in playing, playing sports and, and I

Stephanie Nelson, Host (04:59):

In high school?

Kevin Lewis, Author (05:00):

Yeah, in high school, yes. And I had a lot of lofty aspirations. I thought for sure I was gonna be an Olympic wrestler. That didn't pan out. I thought my backup plan was playing in the N F L

Stephanie Nelson, Host (05:10):

And <laugh>. Good backup.

Kevin Lewis, Author (05:12):

Yeah, good backup plan. But as, as, as time was going on, some of those things became evident they were gonna happen. But you mentioned the life lessons and the connections and, and that's really what it was all about for me. My junior year I was struggling with mental health and getting things straight and was contemplating suicide and, and had the pills in hand. And the one alcoholic beverage that we had in the house, my parents had gone out of town and I was ready to be done. And out of the corner of my eye, I saw, do you remember those long telephone cords that even when our phone's connected to the wall, right? And it just all twisted up down there. I was, it was hanging out. And I saw that in the corner of my eye and I thought, well, if my parents are gonna discover me, the last thing I can do as a mind to be a good boy is try to untangle that.

(06:00):

So I had lifted it and untangled it like they had so many times. And I plugged it back in. And you remember the home of the live line when it was on, and it was like, like a prisoner with a, a last call, you know, like, Hey, you wanna make your call? And I hung that phone up cuz I was ready to be done. And to the right of that phone, my wrestling coach, huge influence in my life, had written a handwritten phone tree. And so I was like, oh, well of course I can't call coach about this. Let, let me find the least likely guy to help me. And he was a senior, he was a year in front of me, and I had just beaten him out for the starting position on our team. I figured he won't want to help me and that'll be fine.

(06:42):

Thankfully I was wrong. And, and he not only answered the phone, but figured out how to drive over to my house before g p s and all that stuff. And he came and he sat with me for hours. He took everything, flushed, everything. And even though I begged him to not tell anybody, he did tell the right person. He told my football coach. And a again, it's just a wow, a beautiful story of a teammate and a coach drawing alongside somebody that needed some help. And, you know, that kind of life experience, it, it just was again reassuring like, okay, I've got better choices, better options, but it stuck with me. And even through college, I'm, I'm going, what in the world was that about God? Like, that just made no sense. Like, I mean mm-hmm. <Affirmative>, yes, I've had struggles, but like, I just, that me pursuing that didn't make sense.

(07:30):

I put it on the back burner, didn't worry about it. And the, the chapter 24 part of this was when I was owning a gymnastics gym in Minnesota, 1200 miles away. I had no experience in this sport. But lo and behold, I, I bought the gym in the town where this family just happened to move into town. They just happened to have a daughter who wanted to do gymnastics. I happened to be the coach doing skill evaluations. I happened to be the pre-teen coach and just happened to have a spot open on my pre-teen group. And she came in and she just joined our team and she was just wonderful, delightful, always had a, a great big smile, but I couldn't get boo as far as talking with her. I mean, it took months to get more than a head nod. And so I even checked in with mom and dad said, Hey, you know, great kid, she's working hard, but is, is there something going on?

(08:20):

She, she doesn't speak a whole lot. And she goes, oh gosh, mom, mom is responding. And she says, gosh, she certainly talks about you. You know, and we're driving, all she's talking about is coach Kevin and gymnastics, and she just loves doing gymnastics. So I just brushed it off, didn't worry about it. She'd stayed with us for a couple of years and then parents decide to move closer to the city. They left on great terms and occasionally we'd see each other at gymnastics meets. But when the time came to to sell the gym, she had earned a banner. If they placed a certain place in the state championships, I put their name up on the wall and I was getting her banner to her. The new owner wasn't gonna keep him, so it just was an excuse to see her and her mom again.

(08:59):

They came out to the gym, gave her her banner, and it was great. And sent her on her. Way later that year, I'd already moved back to Virginia, her mom's posting on Facebook about pictures about her daughter, cuz it's her senior year. And she posted one picture of myself and her daughter with, with me, if you can picture me with a big hair wig. It was the one day a year I joked that I had more hair than the girls <laugh>. And so there's this beautiful picture there, and I just made a comment on it and the next day mom sends me an email off of social media and just said, Hey, I wanted to let you know how special our time was at, at your gym and in particular your coaching. We didn't, we didn't know it then, but our daughter was struggling with thoughts of, of suicide. Mm. And that was just kinda like a bucket of water in your face, a pun. You, you're like going holy. Like we never talked about, Hey girls, what do you do if you're feeling sad? Or that sort of thing. Right. And yet there was something in that communication that connected with that young lady and mom said, you know, that, that that relationship you're coaching really helped, you know, save. Wow.

Stephanie Nelson, Host (10:07):

Wow.

Kevin Lewis, Author (10:08):

Yeah. So

Stephanie Nelson, Host (10:08):

You just never, you never, we never know what people are going through. But what's so neat about that is you were doing this role that you hadn't anticipated you'd ever be qualified for. Right. And you obviously were very good at it, and just naturally, and you touched a person's life without even realizing that mother sent you the email. I am quite certain there are lots of other emails other mothers could have sent. So I always say, you know, on this side of heaven, none of us know the impact that we might be having in people's lives. But that's so beautiful, because of course you could relate to that.

Kevin Lewis, Author (10:42):

Yeah. It, it, it really was something. And I, and I like to think of it you remember the, the, the, the old school folding chairs that they were woven together, you know? Yeah. That's what I, I, I sit there and I go, God, that's what you, I mean the, the story of, of Jonah being eaten by whale and sent over to Niva, you know, like going, okay, yeah, right. There is no way in the world I would've ever picked moving 1200 miles away into a snowy Coldy, Minnesota. But yet that's what I ended up doing. And, and that's just a, a, a beautiful illustration of God weaving people. He's, he's not limited by age difference or miles. I mean, he can just poof, make that sort of thing happen. It just, I don't know, just it's reassuring that I was like, oh God, that's what that was for back in high school. Thank you. Okay. Now I, oh

Stephanie Nelson, Host (11:32):

Yeah. And you know, back when you were in high school, Lisa, when I was in high school, unfortunately this topic of mental health was not, we didn't talk about it. No. It was a source of shame. And I mean, unfortunately, I think 42% of Americans experienced some sort of mental illness or, or emotional difficulties. I read that statistic lately or recently. I'm not sure where it came from. But regardless, it is so much more recognized now and it's hopefully not a source of shame. So we can be more sensitive to people who are going through stuff. They just happen to be going through it at a different time in their life than perhaps we did.

Kevin Lewis, Author (12:11):

Yeah. And, and I'm really glad that you brought that up because I, I think as, as believers as Christians, you know, we, we kind of think rather naively that we'll be immune to that, you know, that lights is all sunshine and rainbows and, and that's not necessarily the case. That's where a lot of this book came from. We had these struggles as a small business person, you know, staffing people, am I gonna have enough clients come in to be paying, you know, all these people and pay the lease and all those sorts of things. Those are normal challenges. But then those, those life challenges come. And I would love to say, oh, I was this picture of strong faith and I was, everything was great. What tipped me over the point was a mass shooting that had happened in our town. And, and even, even before that, I, I had been reconnecting with a friend from college and she and I were comparing notes.

(13:08):

Oh, this new musician, this musician Lauren Dele had come out with a new album and she and I were connecting on this, oh, do you like this song? I like that song. And so I, I was new to social media and I was following, so I decided I'll follow Lauren Dele on social media. And she had mentioned Bob Goff and Oh, we're building a school with Bob Goff. And I was like, okay, well, who's this Bob Goff guy? We had come out of COVID and been shut down once we made it through summer. And I'd been struggling already, like is my, my days as a gym owner were usually six, sometimes seven days a week if it was competitive season. And those were like 15 hour days were just normal. And so it was, burning the candle at both ends would be an understatement.

(13:54):

And I've been doing this for 10, 10 years already. So I was contemplating, God, is it time for something else? Cuz I was getting whooped. And then it was about that time I was connecting with my friend. I decided, well, I'm just gonna list the business for sale. Let's see what happens. If nothing happens, great. Whatever. Literally, after, I think it was two or three days after I listed the business for sale, the state shuts us down for a second time. It shuts down all gyms to try and squash the spread. And so we were gonna have the month of December off. So I had heard about Bob Goff, and I'm gonna pick up this Bob Goff book that Lauren Dayl was talking about. Okay. So I read the book and everything and we roll into January, we're able to open up and into February.

(14:36):

I had discovered Bob has a podcast, so I'm like, well, let's listen to this podcast. And February 8th, I had stumbled upon the episode where he's interviewing a football player, an NFL football player. And this guy at the height of his career left his N F L job. His wife was I think a physician or a dentist or somebody at the height of her profession. They decided they're going to leave their professions. They bought this acreage, I think in North Carolina and they grow food for inner city folks. Hmm. I was, the big take away from the podcast was when extraordinary things happen, just do extra of the ordinary things. And of course, I'm listening to this about 11 o'clock, midnight, whatever. So I put that down, okay, time to go to bed. I wake up the next morning, February 9th, 2021, and I'm going to the gym and I go by the high school and there's state troopers blocking the entrance.

(15:31):

And I'm like, what the heck is going on? And I, of course end up finding out there's a, a mass shooting taking place in our little town. The entire town was on lockdown businesses like mine, the schools, everything. And oh, pulling into the parking lot, the news helicopter and the state police cop are flying over the top of my gym. The, the shooting had taken place 1.2 miles from my gym. Never in my wildest dream. I mean, I'd see this kind of thing on tv, you know? Right. But just never expected in real life. So we get the all clear to have classes and I make the decision. I'm like, we have to provide one sliver of normal for these kids, for these families. This day has been crazy. So I thought, well, I'm just gonna offer classes. If nobody wants to come, that's fine.

(16:18):

If everybody wants to come, that's fine. So we put on classes and my first class of the day was three to five year old ninjas. Okay. So we're doing obstacle courses, everything like that. So the three to five year olds get in there and we would start with a funny story and I'd be like, okay, let's get going. Let's get going to class. And one of the boy raises his hand and he says, coach Kevin, coach Kevin, did you hear about the man who took the gun and shot the people dead? Hmm. Oh my gosh. I mean, those, those words were a punch to the face, punched to the gut, whatever you, I mean, you, like a five year old shouldn't have to even think about that, even think about those words or put them in the form of that question. And, and it was all, you know, I, I, yes, yes I did.

(16:57):

And I, I tried to distract them, but let's get going into class, you know? But it was all I could do to not burst into tears. And, and that night we, we got through the night and it was wonderful. So many people just appreciative for that opportunity to have a a little bit of normal. And I get home and earlier in the day when all this extraordinary thing is happening, I'm thinking, oh, oh, oh, I can do one ordinary, one extra ordinary thing. And I sent an email out to the podcast host and the podcast guest, Hey, would you be praying for our town? And even sent them a link to let them know, Hey, this is really happening. I'm not, I'm not making this up. And I got home that night after the gym and I thought, well, I can't sleep, let me just check email.

(17:39):

Well, sure enough, I thought it was a auto reply, but it was really an email from Bob Goff. And he said, absolutely, I'll be praying for your town. And he goes, and I hope you're taking notes. He goes, I think you might have a book or two in you. And honestly, my reaction was just laughing out loud because I was like, right in the middle of six to seven days a week, you know, 12, 15 hour days, where am I gonna have time to write a book? That's just ridiculous. Okay, great. But I did think, okay, I'll send this response. That's an interesting suggestion. How would one go about doing such a thing? And I put the phone down thinking I'll never hear back again. <Laugh>

Stephanie Nelson, Host (18:14):

Not Bob, you're gonna hear back from him. Yeah.

Kevin Lewis, Author (18:16):

Stephanie, seven minutes later.

Stephanie Nelson, Host (18:18):

I know.

Kevin Lewis, Author (18:19):

I'm like, what in the world? And it, it's, oh, that's the easy part. Write a thousand words a day for 60 days and you're set.

Stephanie Nelson, Host (18:26):

Yeah. Oh, that's easy, <laugh>.

Kevin Lewis, Author (18:28):

Oh yeah. A thousand words a day. Sure. Great. But I, again, I spent probably another hour or two. But it, it was those word, the words of that five year old coming back to me. Did you hear about the man who took the gun and shot that? People did. And it took me back to that, that back when I was five year olds. And because I mean, I think the, you know, the, those times as little kids, we experience maybe what we consider little hertz, you know, I was born with a larger than normal head, and the kids in my neighborhood called me watermelon head. Oh,

(19:02):

Wa yeah. You know, I mean, just little things. But I did, I had a large head and, and it, it's compounded by the fact that I wasn't the best of readers. I struggled to put the words in. You know, so I'm just, those little things, nothing compared to that boy going through lockdown in a mass shooting situation, but it's those little traumas that we experience that, that I think start building, start building, start building. And I, I, that's my hope is that I, I feel like I started sharing some of those stories that I, I think the reader will be able to go, oh yeah, I kind of remember when I went through something similar may, maybe they didn't have a coach and a teammate experience, but maybe they were in choir or on stage. And they remember that connection they had with that, with that teacher or professor or somebody that really helped 'em through a tough time. And that's my hope is that people find, I I say in the book, I, yes, these are my stories, but I'm not the hero. Jesus is the, the, the, the hero of this book. And my hope is that people find their adjacent story, the story that they, that, that makes them connect to what's happening in the book.

Stephanie Nelson, Host (20:09):

Well, I love your cover of your book. It's, as I said, the title of the book is, can you Trust me this much? Trust? Right. I mean, trust every single day, you know, I pray for trust. I mean, if we could just have trust there, you'd be, we'd be all set. Yeah. The peace and everything else would follow naturally. But it's trust that if we have faith the size of a mustard seed. So your cover of your book is mustard seeds. And when we think about that and you see the picture, you're like, well, that is truly tiny. He said, that's all we needed. Faith the size of a mustard seed can do it. What I appreciated too about your book is yes, these are your, that you're sharing, but you have such a wide range of experience. I think it's easy for all of us to say, is what I'm doing really important?

(20:55):

Am I really making a difference in the world? You know what, I'm just a, gosh, I'm just in the small town of Minnesota. I just own a gymnastics gym. Whereas you have no idea that there is a little girl who doesn't even speak to you, right. Whose life you were dramatically impacting, and perhaps you even saved your life by being that encourager. So many times we think, well, if I'm gonna make a difference in the world, I'd get better. Find a really big thing to do. When really it's, it could simply be reframing in your mind what you're already doing. God could be using you right where you are in whatever role you have to be making an impact on people. As you said, not pointing 'em to our story, but pointing people to Jesus. It's reframing where we already are. And that is a big thing.

Kevin Lewis, Author (21:44):

It it absolutely is. And there's, there's, there's a, a, a great story about the, the title, again, I, I would love to take credit for this, but it was during those moments in that that mass shooting experience that I'm unlike going, God, what the heck are you doing? Like, this is just, this is insanity that a five year old should talk about these things. And, and, you know, again, I I think we all experience those, those those moments. Here I'm picking up a paperclip and it's one thing to get one paperclip in your hand and then another, and then another. But sometimes we all get to the, that moment of I've got too many paperclips in my hands. And, and I've been that person that has had those prayerful screaming matches with God <laugh>. I, there I, I kid you not, there was a night I was able to get in the church.

(22:32):

I was going to, I was able to get into it. It was, you know, after the night of the gym, and I'm just screaming at God, like going, what's going on? And the, the pastor who was in the church, he actually happened to be coming in and I, I was like, oh my gosh, did he catch me yelling at God <laugh>? And he was like, he, he, he's like, Hey Kev, it's great to see you. Just, hey, I, I'm locking up. He goes, the door will lock behind you. Don't worry about it. You know? Hmm. Just take your time. And, and I, again, I'd love to say I was in a super great spiritual spot, but you can't see this, but I actually hand wrote out about a dozen those words, can you trust me this much? And actually went to the spice drawer, found mustard seeds and scotch, taped them to the note, and I put them on my computer in the office, in the bathroom, e everywhere, just as little reminders like going, okay, take a breath. This is gonna serve a purpose. You might not know it now. You might not know it for many, many years. Mm-Hmm. <affirmative>. But all you gotta do is take the next step, take one step, trust that this has got a purpose.

Stephanie Nelson, Host (23:33):

Which brings us to, we're about out of time, so I wanna make sure everyone knows about your cool podcast called The Next Step. So Kevin has podcasts, as I said, I mean, he's, part of his professional background is broadcast journalism. His podcast is really good. He's an excellent interviewer. And you've heard he has a great voice. So tune into that. He also has, his book is coming out June 27th, but it's available for presale now. So we have the links on our show notes where you can find it. And Kevin, where can people find your website?

Kevin Lewis, Author (24:09):

I am@hisworks.com. H i z as in zebra, w o r k s.com. And again, nothing create just a little flip on the twist to, to hopefully point people in that, that other direction. It's not about me, but it's about he. Yeah. Yeah. I, I'd love for people too. They can check me out on, I'm on Facebook and Instagram and, and trying to put out little things there too.

Stephanie Nelson, Host (24:35):

I've read some of the chapters of your book because I just have the advanced manuscript. I haven't read all of them, so I'm really looking forward to getting the whole thing. I just wanna thank you so much for your time and what you've done in the lives of those kids. It just touches me so much. And it'll be fun to see what you're gonna do next, what your next step is.

Kevin Lewis, Author (24:53):

Oh, absolutely. Thank you for having me on. It's an honor to be on your show. I appreciate

Stephanie Nelson, Host (24:57):

It. Oh, it's great to see you. Good

Kevin Lewis, Author (24:58):

Seeing you.