Sir JP and Princess Yemilina face a crowd of fearful citizens, a swarm of sap bugs and evidence their time-traveling friend is taking drastic measures to fix the present.
Written and produced by Jennifer Lott
Voice Actors:
Shannon Rea as Nazzy
JP Lott as Sir JP
Jennifer Lott as Yemilina
Owen Lott as Wenoburt
Ivy Lott as Child Yemilina
Lynda Williams as Queen Augusta
Nicole Stoner as Enelcia and Peasant 1
Kenzie Stoner as Rose
Bill Rea as Peasant 2
Sir JP and Princess Yemilina face a crowd of fearful citizens, a swarm of sap bugs and evidence their time-traveling friend is taking drastic measures to fix the present.
Written and produced by Jennifer Lott
Voice Actors:
Shannon Rea as Nazzy
JP Lott as Sir JP
Jennifer Lott as Yemilina
Owen Lott as Wenoburt
Ivy Lott as Child Yemilina
Lynda Williams as Queen Augusta
Nicole Stoner as Enelcia and Peasant 1
Kenzie Stoner as Rose
Bill Rea as Peasant 2
EXT. MARKETPLACE
SOUND: opening theme music
SOUND: marketplace ambiance
SOUND: footsteps
SOUND: clanking armor
SOUND: restless crowd
SOUND: vivicord appears
SOUND: “Go away!”
SOUND: vivicord yelp
NAZZY
Come on, it wasn’t recording you until you got in its face. Leave it alone.
SOUND: “No, no, no!”
YEMILINA
Don’t mind the vivicord, everyone. Our documentary is strictly for ears in the distant future. Not even your direct descendants, as a matter of fact. No relations of yours shall hear anything you’re saying.
SOUND: rude voices
NAZZY
Just as well since you’re being so rude.
SOUND: angry crowd
NAZZY
Welcome back, dear cave people. Sorry about this. Our extinction is looming ever closer. It’s become common knowledge. Makes people edgy.
PEASANT 1
How can you wander about talking to yourselves, huh? Shouldn’t you be fixing our future? Before every creature turns to ashes in a crater?
YEMILINA
We won’t be ash. Our bodies are tastefully vanished by the last living wizard. And there’s no crater, right, Nazzy?
NAZZY
Even ground when our civilization ends. Very smooth.
SOUND: panicked voices
YEMILINA
We’re changing the future in stages. One step at a time. Now…were any babies born today? It is imperative I kiss their foreheads before sundown.
SOUND: panicked voices
PEASANT 2
Let dragons eat the babies! They won’t live to be toddlers anyway!
YEMILINA
That is a rotten, attitude, Sir, and I pity you.
SOUND: panicked voices
SOUND: shoulder grab
WENOBURT
Princess?
YEMILINA
What, Wenoburt?
WENOBURT
Can’t Nazzy take you back to all the babies you missed?
SIR JP
(snort)
The time meddler moving the princess through time is what caused the problem.
WENOBURT
But she moved me and that wasn’t a problem.
SIR JP
You’re a huge problem.
WENOBURT
Why?
SIR JP
She tampered with your destiny.
WENOBURT
I’m right where I’m supposed to be. I’m supposed to be here, so I can meet you and you can teach me to be a dragon slayer.
SIR JP
You are to be a bug expert.
WENOBURT
I don’t want to be a bug expert. That’s how I get eaten.
SOUND: restless voices
PEASANT 1
Where is the Queen?
YEMILINA
We lost track of her. I have a friend searching. No hurry. She’s quite useless, I’m afraid.
SOUND: panicked voices
YEMILINA
I am better suited than my mother to answer your questions! I’m in the thick of things, while she hides from her mistakes—oh! Why won’t they listen?
SIR JP
They barely know you, Princess.
SOUND: clanking armor
SOUND: sword unsheathed
SIR JP
Shut up!
SOUND: crowd noises end
PEASANT 2
Sir JP, please, tell us what’s really going to happen.
SIR JP
We will most likely die meaningless deaths in embarrassing and horrible ways. I wake up every day with this truth in my heart.
YEMILINA
(gasp)
You do? How do you get out of bed?
SIR JP
(quiet grumble):
By putting my feet on the floor.
(raising voice):
You can fight the future, or you can whine about it. Either way, you will move aside and let the proactive people muddle through it. You’re slowing us down.
SOUND: stick swishing
SOUND: stick hitting ground
WENOBURT
What does proactive mean?
SOUND: stick swishing
SIR JP
Not you. You’re just active. Put the stick down.
SOUND: stick swishing
SOUND: stick hitting ground
WENOBURT
It’s my sword.
PEASANT 2
Will your young page play a pivotal role in saving Wilzerlott, Sir JP?
SIR JP
He’s not my page or squire.
WENOBURT
I’m a knight.
SIR JP
Hush!
WENOBURT
(whisper)
I’m a secret knight.
SOUND: Pegasus flying
SOUND: Pegasus lands
SOUND: croaking frog
ENELCIA
I found the Queen. She’s at the castle ruins.
SOUND: dismounting
YEMILINA
Was she moping? Humph! It’s been weeks since the castle blew up. She just can’t let things go, can she? So clingy.
ENELCIA
I don’t think she was moping. She looked mad.
YEMILINA
What did she say?
ENELCIA
I didn’t try to talk to her.
SOUND: croaking frog
NAZZY
I can’t help noticing your daughter is still a frog. Is that healthy?
ENELCIA
She gets her cuddles. All the flies she needs.
NAZZY
You don’t miss cuddling your elf baby?
ENELCIA
A little.
SOUND: swarm of sap bugs
SOUND: panicked voices
SIR JP
Avoid getting bitten at all costs! Hide! Hurry! I don’t want to be the only one…
(heavy sigh)
SOUND: multiple bug bites
SOUND: laughing voices
SIR JP
(frustrated noise)
WENOBURT
(giggle attack / silly noises)
YEMILINA
(giggle attack / singing sounds)
NAZZY
(giddy)
I have a brilliant idea!
SOUND: time travel
SOUND: clanking armor
SIR JP
Don’t trust it! You’ve been bitten! Get back here!
SOUND: sword whoosh
SOUND: time travel concludes
YEMILINA
(through giggles)
Nazzy? Where did you go?
SIR JP
Somewhere impulsive with her brain full of sap. We’re doomed.
SOUND: frog croaks
SOUND: frog eating bugs
ENELCIA
You’re not the only one unaffected, Sir JP. I haven’t been bitten. Look! My daughter is using her new tongue to gobble up bugs before they even touch me.
SOUND: frog croaks
SOUND: frog eating bugs
ENELCIA
Oh, my angel! What a good girl. Do you like being a frog? Do you want to rid the kingdom of—
(gasp of realization)
SIR JP
What?
ENELCIA
We turn every citizen into a frog! That’s how we defeat the sap bugs.
SOUND: happy frog croaks
SIR JP
Your daughter seems sappy happy to me. Frogs may be just as affected by eating the bugs as people are by being bitten.
ENELCIA
So the frogs get sappy. So what? The sap bugs would still be digested and gone. We might want to get Teloopa back. Her transformation potion is lasting longer than any other potion I’ve tried. How many do you think she could whip up if we give her a giant’s cauldron? I know a giant who’d lend us one.
SIR JP
The sap bugs are too numerous. There won’t be enough potions, or enough people willing to be frogs.
ENELCIA
I can vouch for the elves. And we can ask all these lovely people. You’ll be frogs for a good cause, won’t you, folks?
SOUND: laughing and cheering voices
ENELCIA
If you’ve never transformed before, you’re missing out. It’s the best defense we’ve ever had against dragon attacks. My daughter’s living proof.
(singing:)
Reptile, bird or vivicord,
Mix them so you won’t get bored,
SIR JP
You have no sap in your veins. Have some decency and speak.
ENELCIA
Boring!
(singing:)
Frogs too slimy, fish too fin,
Lizards: dragons see as kin,
Get tummies that growl for bugs,
We’ll make save the kingdom mugs!
YEMILINA
(singing:)
Reptile, bird or vivicord,
SIR JP
Arrh, now you’ve set her off!
ENELCIA & YEMILINA
(singing)
Mix them so you won’t get bored,
Frogs too slimy, fish too fin,
Lizards: dragons see as kin,
SOUND: fairy arrives
SOUND: fairy wings
ROSE
(singing)
Get tummies that growl for bugs,
ENELCIA, YEMILINA & ROSE
(singing)
We’ll make save the kingdom mugs!
SIR JP
You, fairy! Get away from those bugs!
ROSE
I thought we were singing.
SIR JP
How do you all know the words when the elf just made it up now? I hate that!
WENOBURT
(giggly)
‘Fish too fin’? Really?
ENELCIA
I made it up on the spot. Give me a break.
SIR JP
(battle cry)
SOUND: sword whooshing
SOUND: armor clanking
YEMILINA
(singing)
Oh, he swings that sword,
Kicking up the dust,
Not hitting a single bug…
I think he’s just avoiding us.
SOUND: bug swarm
SOUND: fairy flying
ROSE
Ahhh!
YEMILINA
(singing)
Buggy stingers missed our fairy friend.
Thank goodness!
They’d probably impale her!
SOUND: fairy flying away
ENELCIA
Bye, Rose!
SOUND: sword sheathed
SIR JP
Elf, you bring the princess. Wenoburt and I will meet you at the castle ruins.
SOUND: mounting horse
SOUND: clanking armor
SOUND: galloping horse
EXT. CASTLE RUINS
SOUND: horse whinny
SOUND: dismount
SOUND: vivicord
WENOBURT
Why is there a vivicord here?
SIR JP
I don’t know.
QUEEN AUGUSTA
It was here when I arrived. Nosy beast! Take it back to the forest.
SIR JP
Are you certain you don’t require my presence here, Your Majesty? You seem…
QUEEN AUGUSTA
(battle cry)
SOUND: footsteps on dirt
SOUND: rocks crashing against magical wall
SIR JP
Agitated.
QUEEN AUGUSTA
I do not require your assistance. Throwing these rocks is good therapy.
(battle cry)
SOUND: rocks crashing against magical wall
SOUND: EEK laughter
WENOBURT
Awww, the tiny people built you a new castle.
SIR JP
It is a castle for themselves, Wenoburt. They are enemies, building over our ruins.
WENOBURT
Their castle looks better.
QUEEN AUGUSTA
I will crush you, you insolent fleas!
SOUND: stomping boots
SOUND: rocks crashing against magical wall
QUEEN AUGUSTA
Get your puny castle off my memories before I get the giants to throw bigger rocks at you. The bigger the rocks, the faster weak magic like yours will erode!
WENOBURT
What’s wrong, Queen?
QUEEN AUGUSTA
I wanted to stomp the EEK into gooey puddles under my boots, Wenoburt. Do you know what they’ve gone and done? They’ve put magic shields up over their invasion camp. Cowardly brutes!
SIR JP
(snort)
So much for the frog theory.
QUEEN AUGUSTA
What frogs?
SIR JP
The elf thinks we should all be frogs so we can eat the sap bugs. But if sap bugs aren’t the only defense the EEK--
QUEEN AUGUSTA
I love it! My loyal subjects can erase my mistakes with their long, greedy tongues. Summon my royal sorcerer.
SIR JP
Didn’t he quit?
QUEEN AUGUSTA
He is hiding somewhere while he plans out how he shall grovel and beg my forgiveness. You will determine his location and speed him along.
SIR JP
(sigh)
With all due respect, Your Majesty, I think we should be more concerned with locating the Time Meddler. Perhaps with a more available magic user? Someone who has some capacity to see changes in the timeline.
QUEEN AUGUSTA
Why? What has that Klutz done to the timeline?
SIR JP
She did not enlighten us.
QUEEN AUGUSTA
If she was secretive, she must be taking treasonous action.
SIR JP
I fear it is not well thought out.
SOUND: Pegasus flying
YEMILINA
(laughter)
SOUND: Pegasus landing
SOUND: dismounting
SIR JP
What took you so long? Your horse flies.
ENELCIA
The princess wouldn’t leave without vivicord.
SOUND: vivicord arrives
SIR JP
There’s no need to drag that one along. There’s already a vivicord here.
WENOBURT
Two vivicords! They can be friends.
SOUND: vivicord chatter
QUEEN AUGUSTA
I can’t stand vivicord chatter. Take them both to the forest.
SIR JP
Might as well.
SOUND: clanking armor
ENELCIA
Wait! Listen.
SOUND: vivicord static
NAZZY
(staticky)
Hello, fair listeners.
SOUND: vivicord static
YEMILINA
Nazzy’s voice!
SOUND: vivicord static
NAZZY
(giddy)
Hello, fair listeners. I snagged a vivicord on my way here, because I didn’t want you to miss my brilliant new plan. After that swarm came down on the marketplace, I realized—
SOUND: vivicord chatter
YEMILINA
(song words in italics)
That’s what just happened. She must have recorded this right after she left us.
QUEEN AUGUSTA
The Time Klutz left evidence of her treachery? How foolish!
SIR JP
She won’t be thinking of herself as treacherous, Your Majesty. She’s been sap-poisoned.
QUEEN AUGUSTA
Play the whole thing.
SOUND: vivicord chattering
YEMILINA
(song words in italics)
Stop chattering, please! Let us hear that recording as clearly as if Nazzy was right here with us.
SOUND: vivicord chatter ends
EXT. CASTLE
SOUND: footsteps
NAZZY
(giddy)
Nice to see the castle in one piece. Maybe I’ll grab some souvenirs.
SOUND: child footsteps
CHILD YEMILINA
Are you my time-travelling friend or my imaginary friend?
NAZZY
Hi, little girl Yemilina! Time traveller. Sorry I confused you last time. I had some silly notion I should let you think I was a dream. Protecting the timeline or some nonsense like that.
CHILD YEMILINA
Are you looking for mommy again?
NAZZY
Just you and some of these fancy dancy tapestries.
SOUND: pulling cloth
NAZZY
I used to live in the castle, you know. Wanna come see how it looks when it’s all blown up by experimental magic? It’s so cool.
CHILD YEMILINA
It sounds sad.
SOUND: pulling cloth
NAZZY
I just miss the tapestries. Maybe that painting…
SOUND: picture frame lifting off wall
CHILD YEMILINA
Are you here to save art?
NAZZY
That’s just a bonus. I’m here to save unkissed babies. Do you like babies?
CHILD YEMILINA
I like babies.
NAZZY
Do you like kissing babies?
CHILD YEMILINA
Mommy and daddy take me to kiss every baby born in the kingdom.
NAZZY
That’s right, you’re already at it. Off we go, then!
SOUND: footsteps
SOUND: shoulder grab
CHILD YEMILINA
Where are we going?
NAZZY
To the future.
CHILD YEMILINA
Am I really old there?
NAZZY
Oh, you’re completely gone. Thirty-one years Yemilina-less! It’s a princess void where I need to stick you. Come on now. Hold my hand.
CHILD YEMILINA
Can I ask mommy first?
NAZZY
Nope.
CHILD YEMILINA
I don’t think it’s a good idea.
NAZZY
Of course it is! It’s brilliant. There’s not a shred of doubt in my mind about that. I’m guaranteed to succeed.
CHILD YEMILINA
Maybe you took too much confidence potion.
NAZZY
No, no, no, I was bitten by sap bugs. You know, those creatures your mother summoned from the portal? Remember them? Weren’t they funny?
CHILD YEMILINA
Are they good bugs?
NAZZY
Good, bad – doesn’t matter. I’m brilliant and you’re going to save the kingdom. Off we go!
CHILD YEMILINA
Can I ask daddy?
NAZZY
Stop being so considerate. Mommy and daddy do things all the time without asking you first.
CHILD YEMILINA
That’s true.
NAZZY
So….ready for an adventure?
SOUND: time travel begins
CHILD YEMILINA
Time ride! Weeeeeeeeee! This is so fun!
SOUND: time travel ends
EXT. CASTLE RUINS
SOUND: vivicord chatter
SIR JP
Do you remember that? When you were a child, did you bounce around with that time meddler in those lost decades?
YEMILINA
(song words in italics)
I don’t remember. It’s shocking. I feel certain I’d have clear memories of something like that. It’s not such an everyday thing, is it? It’s memorable.
SIR JP
Very memorable. If it’s not your sap brain in your way, it must be a powerful memory spell.
ENELCIA
Or it was undone. Something Nazzy did might not have been the final result for the timeline.
QUEEN AUGUSTA
That capricious dragon welp!
SOUND: rock crashing against rocks
QUEEN AUGUSTA
She kidnapped my daughter! The nerve! The villainy!
WENOBURT
But, Queen, you wanted her to kidnap me.
QUEEN AUGUSTA
You were supposed to be older.
YEMILINA
(song words in italics)
Oh, mother. Nazzy is my friend. It’s okay to be kidnapped by friends.
QUEEN AUGUSTA
You were too young to have friends! If that lunatic can’t stick to adult kidnapping, she’ll be rotting in my dungeon before she--
YEMILINA
You don’t have a dungeon.
QUEEN AUGUSTA
She’ll have her powers destroyed by my royal sorcerer.
ENELCIA
You don’t have a royal sorcerer.
QUEEN AUGUSTA
I’m living forever! I can punish her longer than she’ll be alive!
SOUND: rocks crashing against magical wall
SOUND: EEK laughter
SOUND: vivicords moving
SOUND: vivicords chattering
SIR JP
(sigh)
I’m taking the vivicords to the forest.
YEMILINA
Oh, but don’t forget to save the recording we just made.
SIR JP
I’ve already forgotten.
YEMILINA
Then I’d better come with you. Look after Wenoburt, won’t you, Enelcia?
ENELCIA
Sure thing, Princess.
WENOBURT
I don’t want to be a frog.
SOUND: croaking frog
ENELCIA
Aw, come on. My daughter loves it, don’t you, darling?
YEMILINA
Goodbye, fair cave people. Thank you for listening! If we are not chomped by dragons, you shall soon hear more. Wish us luck!
SOUND: closing theme music