S3 E2: The Balloon Brain

Wilzerlott folks decode a song from the future to unravel the mystery of a future man's brain.

Written and produced by Jennifer Lott

Voice Actors:

Shannon Rea as Nazzy

Lisa Van Gool as Pisanna

Tegan Lott as Teloopa

Nicole Stoner as Enelcia

Jennifer Lott as Yemilina

Owen Lott as Wenoburt

Kenzie Stoner as Rose

Tory Lott as Toddler Giant

Transcript

SOUND: Opening theme music

EXT. ENCHANTED FOREST

SOUND: Forest ambiance

SOUND: Distant water fountains and water slides

SOUND: Foliage inflating

SOUND: Overlapping flute tunes

SOUND: Giant footsteps approaching

SOUND: Fairy arriving

SOUND: Fairy wings

TODDLER GIANT

Frozen elf friend! Mommy elf and her baby.

ROSE

Nazzy and Teloopa are frozen. What could have happened?

TODDLER GIANT

The bad balloon trees did something bad! I will beat them up.

SOUND: Fists hitting balloons

ROSE

That’s not helping. Shhhhh! Listen.

SOUND: Overlapping flute tunes

TODDLER GIANT

Too many songs. Go away, songs!

SOUND: Magic ice thaws

ROSE

Nazzy! You’re unfreezed.

NAZZY

(shivering noise)

Oh, wow. That was strange. When did you two get here?

ROSE

Just now. You’ve been frozen for at least an hour. My friends flew this way and saw you, so I came to check on you.

TODDLER GIANT

Fairies were flying all around you and you didn’t move. Why did you freeze?

NAZZY

I didn’t know I froze. The anomaly shot out some kind of gas. I thought the foliage was deflating, but none of that stuff changed. I just got blasted with cold air and then I woke up. It feels like a second ago.

SOUND: Magic ice thaws

ROSE

Teloopa!

TODDLER GIANT

Wakey, wakey, witch.

TELOOPA

(shivering noise)

What the hell! Why did I let you get me interested in this? I refuse to be fascinated any longer. This isn’t worth it.

ROSE

You were frozen for at least—

TELOOPA

I figured that much out. I will never have zero awareness of magical activity, no matter how frozen I am.

NAZZY

I remember feeling something when the cold air hit us. It wasn’t my feeling. It was—

TELOOPA

Shock. He can’t believe where he is.

NAZZY

What?

TELOOPA

The caveman in the anomaly. You felt his shock. I felt it, too.

ROSE

The cold air was his shock?

TELOOPA

Damn it. I’m fascinated again. Yes, absurdly wise fairy. I think my bug bomb going off on a human caused his internal stuff to explode outward into physical things.

NAZZY

The anomaly is…his mind?

TODDLER GIANT

Don’t make the caveman mad! His mind place will grow a volcano.

TELOOPA

You are too young to catch on that quick. Aren’t we still calling you ‘baby giant’?

TODDLER GIANT

I am a big boy.

TELOOPA

Congrats on the potty training. Do you have a name now?

TODDLER GIANT

I am Tory.

TELOOPA

That can’t be it.

SOUND: Overlapping flute tunes

ROSE

What are the songs for? Are they songs stuck in the caveman’s head?

TELOOPA

They started catching on Yemilina’s recordings earlier. Mixing with her voice.

NAZZY

Maybe her song made him think of songs he knows.

SOUND: Dragon wings approaching

SOUND: Soft dragon roar

WENOBURT

(improv, fading in)

SOUND: Dragon wings

SOUND: Dragon landing

SOUND: Soft dragon roar

WENOBURT

I heard that some trees turned into balloons. Whoa, that must be them! Look, Sir JP. Fairies were right.

SOUND: Dragon grumble

SOUND: Feet hitting dirt

WENOBURT

Thanks for the ride. Hey, you guys, remember: if you forget what Sir JP looks like when he’s a dragon, you can ask him for rides. If he rolls his eyes, he’s the one and only good dragon in Wilzerlott. Got it?

ROSE

But if that’s how you find out, what if you ask the wrong dragon and it tries to eat you?

WENOBURT

Hmm…fair point. It’s better not to forget what Sir JP looks like, isn’t it?

TODDLER GIANT

Hi, nice dragon.

SOUND: Soft dragon roar

WENOBURT

Why is the elf frozen?

ROSE

She and her baby must have been hit with a bigger blast of caveman shock.

WENOBURT

What?

TELOOPA

You’re too late. We’re not recapping.

NAZZY

Wenoburt, I’ve been meaning to ask you something.

WENOBURT

What is it?

NAZZY

Well, I know last time the queen’s enchanted flag was waved, it was Yemilina who found that flag and stopped it – to save you.

WENOBURT

(sigh)

Why are you bringing that up? That was so embarrassing.

NAZZY

Sorry. It’s just Yemilina didn’t see who was waving it. We never talked to you about it afterwards and I wondered if you saw who…?

WENOBURT

I saw someone carrying around the flag before Yemilina got there.

NAZZY

You did? Who?

WENOBURT

The lady who makes stained glass windows for the churches.

NAZZY

Pisanna? Oh…no…

ROSE

What?

NAZZY

That might be significant. My future self made an ominous reference to her.

TELOOPA

Aren’t we getting a little off track?

NAZZY

Not necessarily. Pisanna hates me for a reason and anything I’m doing now could be leading to that.

WENOBURT

What about the caveman’s balloon mind? Are we going in there?

NAZZY

We’ll have to.

WENOBURT

Oh, I forgot to bring my new dagger! Don’t go in without me. Sir JP, please take me back to my house, please, please, please? I need to be prepared. There could be nightmares in there I have to fight. Hi-ya! Hooooo-yo!

SOUND: Dragon sigh

WENOBURT

Thank you!

SOUND: Mounting dragon

SOUND: Dragon wings

WENOBURT

(fading out)

Wheeeeeee!

SOUND: Dragon wings fading out

NAZZY

I’m going to find out if Pisanna can clarify anything for me.

TELOOPA

No. Not interested.

NAZZY

I don’t make my plans to entertain you.

TELOOPA

Just don’t take too long. When Enelica unfreezes, I’m going to try to convince her she’s been frozen for a hundred years and she’s holding her great-great grandchild. The more bored I get, the bigger your job fixing her shattered grip on reality.

SOUND: Giant stomp

TODDLER GIANT

Bad witch!

SOUND: Fairy wings

ROSE

I’ll tell her the truth.

TELOOPA

Don’t spoil my fun.

SOUND: Banishment spell

NAZZY

Where did you send them?

TELOOPA

Nowhere dangerous. They’ll just have to commit to some travel time to lecture me again.

NAZZY

I’ll hurry.

SOUND: Time Travel – departing

EXT. MARKETPLACE

SOUND: Time Travel – arriving

SOUND: Marketplace ambiance

SOUND: Distant running footsteps on dirt

SOUND: Distant running footsteps on rock

NAZZY

I see Yemilina. I better not let her see me.

SOUND: Walking footsteps on dirt

SOUND: Magic flag waving

NAZZY

It is Pisanna waving the flag!

YEMILINA

(distant)

Who’s here? Who’s waving it? Show yourself!

SOUND: Walking footsteps on rock

NAZZY

Don’t show yourself.

PISANNA

(startled noise)

SOUND: Flag dropped

NAZZY

I need to talk to you.

SOUND: Overlapping footsteps on rock

YEMILINA

(fading out)

Coward! Whoever it was is gone.

PISANNA

Get away from me, you – you – you crime against nature!

NAZZY

Take it easy.

PISANNA

That’s what he called you when I explained you to him. He wanted to know what transported him to such a bizarre place and I told him all about you.

NAZZY

Do you mean…the caveman from 2025? You know him?

PISANNA

Know him? Know him!

NAZZY

You are connected to what’s currently happening. How do you know him?

PISANNA

He was my caveman! I looked after him for four years.

NAZZY

Really? But then how did he end up—

PISANNA

What is that wretched princess doing with my flag? I need it back.

SOUND: Scuffle

NAZZY

Leave her alone. She’s protecting a child who was powerfully affected by you waving that flag.

PISANNA

It’s the rest of Wilzerlott that I need affected. We must reinstate the queen!

NAZZY

A loyal mob won’t get her back on the throne. She’s trapped in an enchanted maze andthesorcerer who made it is a fish now. He can’t even be forced to free her.

PISANNA

Only the queen knows how to summon the Pus Bugs that will infect the dragons with a lethal disease. Only she can save us. Only she can avenge my caveman!

NAZZY

The bug summoning went wrong when she did it herself. Maybe if I can find her original research…wait. Why did you say ‘avenge’? Dragons had nothing to do with—

PISANNA

Is it too much to ask that a man die of natural causes in his own natural habitat? Why must you snatch and toss people like playthings? Why don’t you play with a life of your own for once? See if you can even get one!

NAZZY

Look, you seem to think—

PISANNA

I wish I’d never met him. He makes me crave unattainable things and now I can’t even appreciate the gentlemen who admire my gorgeous windows in church. I want galleries and world fame. I can’t even yell at him about it now that he’s dragon dung, the careless simpleton.

NAZZY

You think a dragon ate—

PISANNA

I told him dragons aren’t picky eaters. I swore they wouldn’t care about the so called ‘plastics’ in his blood. The pollutants and contaminants. I warned him he’d be delicious enough for those brutes. Why couldn’t he have just listened—

NAZZY

He wasn’t eaten! I know where he is.

PISANNA

(shocked)

What? Where?

NAZZY

He got caught in some kind of spell anomaly in the forest. We haven’t found a way into it yet, but we’re trying to get to him. I promise he’s alive.

PISANNA

You’re lying.

NAZZY

Why would I?

PISANNA

To mess with me. You figured out I’m the one littering your house with broken glass.

NAZZY

A minor inconvenience. I’m not a vindictive person.

PISANNA

You have a funny way of showing it.

NAZZY

I didn’t target a man from 2025 just to turn your life upside down. It was an accident.

PISANNA

There should be no such thing for a time traveller! Why don’t you just go back and undo everything you ever did wrong?

NAZZY

That gets complicated. Some things already done set certain other things in motion that have such a big impact that—

PISANNA

No, no, no! Don’t explain it. I’m right and I don’t want you to explain it!

NAZZY

You sounded like you were asking.

PISANNA

I resent your unruffled tone. It’s so disrespectful.

NAZZY

You’d rather I start screaming at you?

PISANNA

Yes! Attack me to silence my searing truths, so you can continue your reign of chaos. You know you want to, Time Meddler!

NAZZY

Okay, well, if you change your mind, join us two weeks from now in the forest beside the water park. You can help us save your caveman.

PISANNA

You, you, you—

SOUND: Time Travel – departing

EXT. ENCHANTED FOREST

SOUND: Time Travel – arriving

SOUND: Forest ambiance

SOUND: Distant water fountains and water slides

SOUND: Foliage inflating

SOUND: Overlapping flute tunes

SOUND: Baby fussing

ENELCIA

You monster! I thought I missed her whole childhood! I already lost so much time when she was a frog.

TELOOPA

It was funny.

ENELCIA

No, it wasn’t!

TELOOPA

But it was. You had to look at her twice.

ENELCIA

I could tell she wasn’t my great-grandchild.

TELOOPA

Oh, really? If you didn’t believe me even for a second, why not blow a rude raspberry? Why not an immediate ‘don’t be ridiculous, Teloopa’?

ENELCIA

As if you weren’t disoriented and gullible after you unfroze!

TELOOPA

I wasn’t. 

ENELCIA

(angry growl)

TELOOPA

Look, if you need to go home now and savor some Mommy time, I’m not judging you. Honest. We’ll see you at our next weird mystery gathering.

ENELCIA

I’m not missing this one, you childless, powerful woman! You think you get all the fun. I’m getting a babysitter!

SOUND: Retreating footsteps

SOUND: Saddle movement

SOUND: Pegasus whinny

SOUND: Pegasus wings departing

SOUND: Dragon wings approaching

WENOBURT

(improv)

ENELCIA

Ahhh, Wenoburt, that better be Sir JP you’re riding, because I don’t want my Pegasus to panic!

WENOBURT

It’s Sir JP. Stop freaking out.

SOUND: Dragon noise

ENELCIA

(fading out)

That’s smart of you, not trying to ride a real dragon. Good call!

SOUND: Pegasus wings fading out

SOUND: Dragon landing

WENOBURT

I’m ready for the balloon brain!

SOUND: Feet hitting dirt

NAZZY

We still need to find a way in.

TELOOPA

Oh, so your little trip just now got us nowhere?

NAZZY

It might yield results. I invited someone who knows the caveman personally.

SOUND: Overlapping flute tunes (one getting louder than the others)

TELOOPA

There’s more than one tune in that jumble.

WENOBURT

One song is getting louder. We should hum it.

(hums Five Little Monkeys)

SOUND: Disturbed foliage

SOUND: Rubber friction

SOUND: Dragging bed

SOUND: Creaking bed

TELOOPA

What the…?

NAZZY

Uh, for the benefit of our listeners, a big bed just popped out of the balloon trees.

WENOBURT

But none of the balloons popped.

TELOOPA

The trapped caveman is tired, or…is it because you were singing? Is that song we keep hearing about a bed?

SOUND: Pegasus wings fading in

WENOBURT

It must be a lullaby.

TELOOPA

Okay, so sing about stars and sleepy bunnies and stuff. Go on.

SOUND: Pegasus whinny

ENELCIA

Are we singing? What are we singing? I wanna sing.

TELOOPA

That was fast.

ENELCIA

My babysitters are amazing! I can’t believe I didn’t try village raising sooner.

TELOOPA

You owe them their grossest chores. Don’t forget.

ENELCIA

Yeah, yeah, okay. So look – free hands! Look at my baby-free hands! What can I do?

TELOOPA

Dance choreography?

ENELCIA

What’s the song?

WENOBURT

Whatever that is. Listen.

SOUND: Overlapping flute tunes (one louder than the others)

ENELCIA

I don’t recognize that tune.

NAZZY

That’s the problem. It’s from the future.

ENELCIA

Why is there a bed out here? 

WENOBURT

It’s a clue about the song.

SOUND: Overlapping flute tunes (one louder than the others)

ENELCIA

Sounds kind of simple. Over and over again notes, like a little kid could sing…the caveman was little once, right? He got shocked and probably scared by this whole thing and when people get scared maybe they think of their mommies? Songs their mommies sang to them?

TELOOPA

You think it’s a kid song? Wenoburt, you guess.

WENOBURT

I don’t know caveman kid songs.

TELOOPA

Nazzy? You know what kids sing about in the future.

NAZZY

Not really. I don’t hang out with kids when I go to the future.

TELOOPA

Come on, we’ve got a kid and a time traveler here. You two have to figure this out. Think harder.

SOUND: Trotting horse (fading in)

WENOBURT

I’m thinking. Umm…

(improv)

SOUND: Horse snort

WENOBURT

(gasp)

The princess is out of bed! Sir JP, look! The princess!

SOUND: Startled dragon noise

WENOBURT

Look, over there! She’s coming this way with the weird stained glass lady.

SOUND: Dragon growl

YEMILINA

(fading in)

You should have sought Nazzy out the moment you met him. If you’d only informed the Nazzy of four years ago about her future self’s mistake, that Nazzy could have sent him home straight away and you wouldn’t have gotten so attached. 

PISANNA

Rubbish!

SOUND: Saddle movement – dismount

PISANNA

Nazzy of four years ago was still kicking herself for dropping you thirty-one years in the future.

SOUND: Feet hit dirt

PISANNA

She was hopeless at carrying people with her.

YEMILINA

Well, she can fix it now.

PISANNA

She hasn’t for you. Why aren’t you back in your real time?

YEMILINA

Because then I’d be past child-bearing age by the time Sir JP was old enough to settle down and raise a family with me. Really, what a stupid question.

SOUND: Dragon roar

YEMILINA

I know I’m supposed to be on bed rest, My Love. Pisanna burst into our cottage demanding she find Nazzy before Nazzy could lure her into this trap – which of course, Nazzy did no such thing, she merely invited Pisanna to participate in this rescue effort. I had to bring her here myself. She wouldn’t come without me.

PISANNA

You seemed keen enough to get out of that cottage.

YEMILINA

Shhh!

SOUND: Dragon growl

YEMILINA

I was resting peacefully. It’s Pisanna’s fault I’m here.

PISANNA

I’m just using you as a shield.

YEMILINA

(gasp)

I’m pregnant!

PISANNA

Double shield.

SOUND: Dragon roar

NAZZY

Careful with that roar, Sir JP; you might breathe fire accidentally. Pisanna, there’s no need for bodyguards. There’s no trap here for you. Not that we know of, anyway. We’re stepping into the unknown. It’s probably less so, for you. You might actually know how this man’s mind works.

PISANNA

What will you do with him if you find him?

NAZZY

Return him safely to his time.

PISANNA

Oh! No, you mustn’t do that. He’ll have to stay in Wilzerlott.

NAZZY

You said I should have left him in his ‘natural habitat.’

PISANNA

I was angry. I didn’t mean it. You can’t take him back to 2025. He hates it there. It’s always burning and flooding and there’s a convicted felon running his country.

YEMILINA

(gasp)

NAZZY

I’ll drop him off a bit later then. Once they’ve sorted out…well, at least the government.

YEMILINA

Hadn’t you better bring the 2025 people some frog transformation potions instead? Their prisons must be bursting at the seams if they are being forced to put their felons in positions of power.

PISANNA

It’s true! They desperately need a frog justice system.

NAZZY

Let’s keep our focus small for now. One man right here to rescue…

SOUND: Overlapping flute tunes

SOUND: Inflating foliage

PISANNA

Catch us up. What’s happening?

WENOBURT

We’re trying to guess what the dumb cave kids are singing about.

YEMILINA

Do you mean the cave children of 2025?

ENELCIA

Yeah, the caveman might be projecting his songs from his childhood.

TELOOPA

Because his mind vomited like a baby all over Yemilina’s recording.

ENELCIA

Ewww! I just said he might be scared. You’re making it weird.

TELOOPA

She gets it.

SOUND: Overlapping flute tunes (one getting louder than the others)

PISANNA

Hmmm…he sang a couple little songs for me once. I think I recognize that louder tune…

NAZZY

Anything about—?

PISANNA

Quiet, you! Let me concentrate. Yes…I can almost hear it now. The song involved injuries.Head trauma, I think.

ENELCIA

Oh. Maybe not a kid song, then. Was it a ballad about a duel?

PISANNA

Oh, no, not violence. Accidents. I recall they seemed…avoidable.

TELOOPA

Hmm…is the song about standing behind a horse? Stupid people do that. Heads get hurt.

PISANNA

The way they get hurt started with ‘B’…buh…buh…

TELOOPA

Bruised? Battered? Broken?

ENELCIA

Bonked? Bumped?

PISANNA

That’s the one – bump! I remember now.

(singing:)

Five little monkeys jumping on the bed…

WENOBURT

And they bump their heads?

YEMILINA

Because they’re jumping on the bed! That’s why this bed is here.

WENOBURT

Me first! I wanna jump on that bed!

SOUND: Bed creak

SOUND: One body jumping on bed

ENELCIA

Whoa, whoa, aren’t you ignoring a cautionary tale?

YEMILINA

It’s what the bed wants. That’s why there are five dents in the mattress. We’re meant to jump on them!

SOUND: Two bodies jumping on bed

SOUND: Grumpy dragon noise

YEMILINA

Calm down, my love. I won’t bump my head. It only happens to monkeys.

SOUND: Entrance slowly opening

TELOOPA

Something’s happening. Do you see that dark crack starting at the top of the balloon trees?

PISANNA

I see it! Yes, that must be…

TELOOPA

The way in, right? His songs got drawn out by Yemilina’s recording. If we make ourselves part of this song, it might just draw us in.

PISANNA

Yes! Yes, we must jump like his foolish little monkeys to get to him!

SOUND: Three bodies jumping on bed

TELOOPA

Worth a shot.

SOUND: Four bodies jumping on bed

TELOOPA

Get up here, Enelcia.

ENELCIA

Ooookay.

SOUND: Five bodies jumping on bed

SOUND: Entrance slowly opening

PISANNA

It’s working! The entrance is widening.

YEMILINA

There’s only five jumping spots. I don’t think six of us can go in. Wenoburt, you’re too young for this. Go wait in the Elven Grove.

WENOBURT

No way! I’m the best jumper. Look at me go! Wheeee!

SOUND: Dragon roar

YEMILINA

(sigh)

Oh, all right. I guess my belly is the youngest child, technically.

SOUND: Body getting off bed

SOUND: Dress movement

SOUND: Footsteps on dirt

SOUND: Four bodies jumping on bed

WENOBURT

Come on, Nazzy, you be the fifth monkey.

SOUND: Bed creak

SOUND: Five bodies jumping on bed

NAZZY

Do we have to jump as long as the song?

SOUND: Five bodies jumping on bed

PISANNA

Don’t jump so close to me, Time Meddler!

NAZZY

I’m not trying to. Beside you was the only spot left.

PISANNA

You’re jumping into my personal space.

NAZZY

It’s hard to jump straight up and down in the exact same spot.

PISANNA

Only for you! It’s no wonder you zig-zag like a drunken maniac through people’s lives.

NAZZY

I’m trying to help you find your caveman.

PISANNA

We don’t need you. Get off!

YEMILINA

Don’t push her!

SOUND: Body slam

NAZZY

(startled noise)

SOUND: Splash potion

SOUND: Body hitting dirt

NAZZY

(grunt of pain)

YEMILINA

Oh, Nazzy!

SOUND: Dress movement

YEMILINA

You didn’t bump your head, did you? I thought it wasn’t a violent song, Pisanna!

NAZZY

I-I think I’m okay. She just splashed me with something…oh no…

SOUND: Flesh expanding

SOUND: Blubber slapping dirt

NAZZY

Ohhh…this is uncomfortable.

PISANNA

(nasty laugh)

You’re not so tough when your body changes shape, are you? I heard how badly that diminishes your power.

ENELCIA

How could you do that to her? She’s like a beached whale with a human head and feet!

(freaked out noise)

TELOOPA

Relax. Transformation potions have to be consumed to have a lasting effect. Splashing it on her like that will only affect the splashed parts of her, and only for a few minutes.

WENOBURT

We’ll wait for you, Nazzy!

ENELCIA

I can’t jump much longer. Hurry up and lose the blubber!

SOUND: Body flop on bed

SOUND: Three bodies jumping on bed

SOUND: Entrance slowly closing

WENOBURT

Don’t stop jumping, Enelcia. Look! You’re making the entrance close.

ENELCIA

(groan)

SOUND: Four bodies jumping on bed

NAZZY

The entrance is closing anyway.

ENELCIA

But I’m jumping!

NAZZY

You’re all jumping, but I don’t think it works with four. It takes five jumpers to open that thing. Pisanna, please—

PISANNA

Put the princess back! I’ll go nowhere with you!

NAZZY

You’ll have to, Yemilina. We could lose our chance if someone doesn’t go right now.

SOUND: Dragon growl

YEMILINA

I’m sorry, my love! I don’t think you’ll fit on this bed. I’ll be careful!

SOUND: Five bodies jumping on bed

SOUND: Entrance opening

YEMILINA, TELOOPA, WENOBURT, ENELCIA and PISANNA

(surprised screams)

SOUND: Entrance closing

SOUND: Screams cut out

SOUND: Forest ambiance

NAZZY

(sigh)

I hope there’s a vivicord in there.

SOUND: Vivicord approach

SOUND: Vivicord chatter

NAZZY

Oh, that’s right. You walked through Mijar’s enchanted maze barrier. This one isn’t any tougher for you? You can follow them in? Would you mind?

SOUND: Vivicord chatter

NAZZY

Thanks very much. Farewell, cavepeople of the future. You’ll hear from the five jumpers as soon as this vivicord catches up to them. In the meantime, I’m going to see if I can start smoothing things over with Pisanna. Her dragon mission would benefit us all. It might curb her anger if I can find the queen’s research. If I’m not roasted by dragons, you’ll soon hear more from me. If they’re not…

SOUND: Foliage inflating

SOUND: Flute tune “Five Little Monkeys Jumping on the Bed” fading out

NAZZY

Well, I’m not sure what could happen to them in that Mind Anomaly…but wish them luck!

SOUND: Closing theme music